Tainted Royalty - cielshouse - Shingeki no Kyojin (2024)

Chapter 1: 00. Prologue

Chapter Text

Year 825 - Marley-Liberio

“Useless,” muttered a young man pacing the sterile corridors, his lips turned down in distaste while the smell of rubbing alcohol permeated his being. “f*cking useless,” he scowled, his green eyes narrowed down at the floor. “I’m a doctor, dammit.” He ran a frantic hand through his dark hair, lips curling back in disgust as his hair stuck to his clammy palm. “I should be in there,” he quietly insisted, “I should be in there!” He spun around to shout at the door, though no one paid him a second glance.

“Mr. Jaeger, I’ll kindly ask you to lower your voice,” came the stern nurse’s voice from behind the desk. Grisha Jaeger had been pacing the corridor for several hours while his wife lay just behind a closed door, and she’d had more than enough of his anxious movements.

“My wife is in there,” she watched the man jut an angry finger towards a door. “And she’s screaming, how do you expect me to stay calm?” he incredulously fired. The nurse regarded him for a moment, fixing her eyes on the bags beneath his eyes, the messy brown hair, his creased clothing, and the wrinkles he seemed to have developed within the last three hours. “If I could just—”

“Mr. Jaeger, I insist you sit down and stop disturbing our other patients,” came the nurse’s quick, apathetic tone, “If you don’t, I’ll have security throw you out.” She left no room for arguments, marching into the filing room behind her desk while Grisha sucked in a displeased breath.

“Bitch,” Grisha glowered, watching her shadow in the window open a file, though his angry mood dampened when he heard a guttural scream, and before he could process it, he had slammed a fist up against the door, slouching against it helplessly. His wife was suffering. She was suffering because she was an Eldian instead of a Marleyan. It was all corrupt. The whole f*cking country. “This is bullsh*t,” he seethed quietly, crumpling against the door while another scream echoed.

What was he even doing with himself? He was a man, a proud Eldian, and there he was, unable to do anything but listen to his wife's wails. He should have been there, holding her hand and telling her to breathe through the pain. She would have given him a small smile, and he would gently dab the sweat from her forehead. And then, soon enough, little cries would reverberate around the room while they held their son, Zeke, a product of their love, who would carry on the royal bloodline and lead the Eldians to victory. He would look regal, just as Dina did, and he’d hold himself with pride, shoulders back, chin high. He would be the one giving orders, not receiving them.

“Grisha, get yourself a cup of coffee. They’ll be here when you get back.” It was that damn nurse again, ordering him around without a care in the world. And yet, despite his unyielding fury, Grisha couldn’t help the tired sigh he breathed out, relaxing his shoulders and hesitantly pushing himself off the door.

“You’re right,” he softly acknowledged, shuffling down the corridor at a snail's pace. He focused on the fluorescent lights and the shadows they cast over the white paint, which had begun to chip and crack over the concrete. It seemed blank and empty, devoid of all life, despite being the maternity ward. An uneasy shudder wracked through Grisha. Why was the maternity ward so vacant? Shouldn’t there have been more people, or more colour, at the very least? In his own hospital, the maternity ward had been painted a soft, calming pink, but here? A crisp white wall stared back at him, burning his eyes if he stared for too long at the cracked paint.

The nurse let out an exasperated sigh, watching the 20-year-old sulk his way down the hallway. He was insufferable. Absolutely impossible. She had no clue how Dina Fritz put up with his petulant behaviour, let alone why she agreed to marry the spineless man.

“Grisha Jaeger?” a man called out reluctantly, his eyes skimming over the small waiting room. He wore a white lab coat stained with clots of blood and bizarre brown spots. A few nurses slipped by him, eager to freshen up into cleaner scrubs.

“I’m here,” Grisha hollered, sprinting back the way he came. “I’m here. Is she alright? Is my son okay?” he frantically questioned, eyes wide while the doctor peered down at him, a strange and unsettling look on his face.

“Yes, but—” Grisha’s heart dropped while time seemed to freeze, apprehension and heart-wrenching fear gripping him tightly. The doctor shifted uncomfortably, clearing his throat before he continued, “You… You also have a daughter,”

The doctor watched as the young man’s jaw slackened, a blank look settling over Grisha’s eyes as he processed the news.

Grisha Jaeger had a… daughter?

Grisha moved forward, past the doctor and into the room numbly. Blood-covered drapes were piled high on a tray at the end of the bed, while small cries filled the air. Dina Fritz lay in the hospital bed, pale and sweaty. Hair clung to her forehead and temples despite having pulled her blonde locks back in a braid, and her hands quivered just slightly while she held two tightly wrapped bundles to her chest. She tiredly smiled at her husband, leaning against a battered pillow and the headrest on the bed.

“Twins,” she murmured weakly, watching Grisha step towards her bed before he knelt on the ground, peering up at her with an unreadable expression. For a moment, Dina’s heart leapt into her throat, terror seizing her as she froze. Was he unhappy she had conceived a daughter for him? Her fingers subconsciously tightened on the blankets. Would her husband rid them of the girl? Dina knew she hadn’t been accounted for, but she’d already grown attached to the infant.

“We had...twins,” Grisha uttered. He seemed dazed as he held his arms out, and Dina bent forwards, transferring the newborn into his waiting hands. A tuft of brown hair peeked out from the blankets and Grisha let out a disembodied laugh. “Dina,” he swallowed thickly, staring in disbelief at the child who curiously peered up at him, “I’m a father, can you believe it?” The baby tilted her tiny head, miniscule fingers reaching up and pressing against Grisha’s cheek. “Oh my god, what are we going to name her?” Dina’s lips tilted up, relief settling into her bones, smiling at her husband and daughter.

“Faye.”

A choked gasp left Grisha’s throat while he whipped his head up to stare in shock at his wife, jaw unhinged and wide eyes.

“That’s—” the world brightened just slightly, everything more vibrant and lively. “My sister? Are you sure?” He watched Dina nod, and tears pooled in Grisha’s eyes as he gaped down at his newborn daughter.

“Faye,” he said tentatively, testing the name on his tongue. A small shriek sounded out from Dina’s arms, causing Grisha to chuckle quietly. “I have a feeling your brother is going to do a lot of that,” he mused softly, leaving Dina to laugh at her husband’s sarcasm.

“Grisha, what—” Dina cut herself off, biting her lip in a demure fashion, averting her eyes from her husband, choosing instead to look out the large, barred window. “What if we aren’t ready for this? What if something happens? The police are just waiting to—”

“Dina,” Grisha breathed, coddling their daughter and taking a seat next to his wife on the hospital bed. “We can’t think like that, these kids… You are royalty. We’ll do the best we can for them,” He brushed his fingers over Dina’s cheek, silently urging her to peer up at him, but instead she kept her eyes locked on the world outside. “We’ll talk about this in the privacy of our own home, but promise me you won’t fret over it the whole day, please?”

Dina pressed her lips together in a thin line while Zeke gave another sharp, shrill cry from Dina’s collarbone. She glanced over at her husband, who clutched onto Faye tightly, wiggling a finger near her face until her tiny fingers wrapped around Grisha’s finger. He smiled widely, a soft chuckle making its way past his lips, while Faye gurgled in his arms. Grisha was a natural.

Dina hummed, rocking forwards slightly and easing the infant's cries. She’d been surprised when Zeke came out of her, crying and helpless to the world around him. He even looked like Dina: the same blonde hair, fair skin and big blue eyes. But when she had another contraction, she nearly lost it. And then out came Faye, and Dina’s world tilted on its axis, everything tumbling and flattening into an unnatural position. The newborn had cried, as any other child would, but she’d been bizarrely cognizant of the world around her, curiously peering around the room and pointing towards Dina. Zeke’s eyes were wide and innocent, a beautiful baby blue, but Faye’s were sharp and jarring.

*

The infants slept soundly in a crib, curling next to each other to absorb the other’s body heat. The room was small, with a single crib and a chest filled with toys in the corner. Moonlight shone down on the twins through a barred window, and Grisha found himself struggling to peel his eyes away from the scene, enamoured with his children.

Dina had retired hours ago, exhausted from birthing two children, but Grisha didn’t mind, not one bit. His eyes roved over to two, silently memorizing their features and imagining what they’d look like in a few years. Zeke tossed, extending a tired hand over his body and snuggling into Faye’s cheek, his mouth opening and closing quietly as though he were sucking milk from his bottle.

Grisha sighed, a tired smile curving on his lips. These two babies would save the Eldians from their oppression. He would teach them the truth amidst the propaganda and lies the government promulgated, and he would help them pave the way to a better future. A future in which they could wander through the streets without receiving a stranger’s glare, or fear that they’d be taken by the authorities. A future in which Zeke would be hailed a hero, his name would be known throughout Marley, and he’d make his way through the country, free to go and do as he pleased, burning the armbands which separated Eldians from Marleyans out of existence. A future in which he could see an air blimp with Faye, and they could both return home safely.

Zeke stirred, a cry vibrating in the infant’s throat, and Grisha chuckled, bending down to brush the stray hairs off Zeke’s face.

“Don’t cry,” Grisha whispered, stroking the chubby cheek. “Rise from your sleep victorious, and lead this godless country to greatness.” Zeke leaned into his father’s touch, a small, relieved breath leaving his lips while he slept, and Faye shifted in her sleep, reaching a tired arm out and pushing her cheek against Zeke with a content sigh.

Yes. Those two were humanity’s saviours. Grisha was certain of that much.

“Come to bed.” It was his beautiful wife, leaning against the doorframe, admiring her husband. Grisha hesitantly glanced back at the twins. They looked so innocent, completely at the world’s mercy. “We’ll hear them when they wake up, come dear,” she pushed, stepping forwards and grabbing her husband’s hand, gently leading him away from the newborns.

Chapter 2: 01.

Chapter Text

Year 832 - Marley, Liberio

Faye swallowed thickly as she stared up at the tall warrior instructor, standing in his shadow next to her twin. He was intimidating, even with a neutral expression on his face. His hands were clasped together behind his back, and he refused to tilt his head down to survey the two children, instead staring down his nose at them. “I could have sworn I told you two that Marley had no use for pathetic warriors like you,” he snapped, “So why the hell did you come back?”

The words caught on Faye’s throat while she bowed her head respectfully, following Zeke’s example. They’d gone over it a thousand times last night; she knew the words like the back of her hand. All she needed to do was take a deep breath and—

“To show our loyalty to Marley, sir,” Faye ground out, heart hammering. “And… and to atone for the sins of Eldia, please allow us to take part in training today, sir.” She could barely feel her fingertips while she waited for the instructor’s decision.

Zeke kept his eyes trained forward, a stern look on his young face. The twins were only six, but they had the entire Eldian population riding on their small shoulders. They needed to do well today, no matter the cost.

“Get your asses moving; you’re already behind,” the instructor spat while the twins nodded, the backpacks weighing their small forms down as they rushed forward. The gun was cold in Faye’s hands while she pushed on to catch up with the other kids; the cool steel did little to soothe her frozen fingertips as she jostled with it clumsily.

Faye’s insides felt chilled despite being blisteringly hot, like she had been stuck in an ice bath the entire day. Maybe it was because she knew her parents were watching from a vantage point, and if she performed badly, all of the Eldians would suffer for her misdoings. She was supposed to restore Eldia with Zeke, give them back their freedom...

Faye felt disembodied while she sprinted next to Zeke; she could feel her lungs expanding with air, but she couldn’t feel her legs. She didn’t dare look behind her at her parents, no. That would only slow her down, and in turn, she’d make a bigger fool of herself. Her father’s admonition to do better within the program made Faye strive to ameliorate her performance, which ultimately landed her at the top of the class.

She chewed her lip when she reached the others, Zeke a few paces behind. Why was she so nervous? She’d caught up with the others in no time.

“Zeke,” Faye placed a hand on the boy's shoulder, stumbling back when a stranger turned their head and sneered at her, pushing her away from them. “Who— But then, where’s my brother?”

“Jaeger, get a move on!” came their sergeant’s voice, and Faye’s blood ran cold as she turned to see Zeke in a cold sweat, staring up to where she knew their parents should have been, but only her mother watched, face crumpled and lips quivering as she covered her mouth with her hand in horror at her son’s lacklustre performance.

Faye rushed back, grabbing Zeke’s hand and pulling him forward.

“Come on,” She hissed, “Stop looking for their approval; you’ll only sh*t yourself more/” Faye pulled him forwards, seamlessly blending in with the rest of the group. In her periphery, she saw how red Zeke had gone, and sympathy washed over her.

“Zeke, get your head out of the clouds,” Faye whispered, tugging on his hand gently while their instructor belted out orders. “We’ll figure something out, but you need to focus on this, or else we’ll get kicked out.” That was the last thing she needed. Grisha would be furious, and Dina would never look at either of them again.

They ran drills the entire afternoon, mercilessly practicing their sharpshooting skills and athleticism. This wasn’t just some summer boot camp they were participating in. They were preparing for an all-out war, one that they might die fighting for.

“Damn,” Zeke muttered, squinting his eyes as the bullet only just grazed the side of the target.

“Here,” Faye pushed his hand to tilt the gun a little higher and more to the right, discarding the use of the magnifier. “Try that. You have to remember to account for the wind,” she reminded, a determined look in her eyes.

He took in a deep breath, settling his finger on the trigger while he braced himself for the kickback, and when his index finger squeezed, the gun shot back into his shoulder.

“How do you always do that?” The words came out astonished, as though Faye didn’t do this every day.

“I keep doing it until I get it right.”

“Yeah, but what if you never get it right?” Zeke’s tiny head canted to the side, eagerly waiting for his sister’s advice.

“Then I keep doing it until I do,” she stated. “Even if it takes a million years. Mommy says being stubborn isn’t attractive, but it definitely counts for something.”

“Yeah, but I’ve been doing this just as long as you,” Zeke retorted, his fair eyebrows knitting together. “How come I always have more trouble than you?”

“You’re too tense,” Faye simply said, “You take training so seriously that sometimes I think you’ll pop a blood vessel.” She watched him take an offended step back, and Faye found herself rushing to finish her sentence, “If you just took a deep breath every once in a while, unclenched your jaw, and straightened out your shoulders, you’d advance a lot quicker.”

“Fine,” Zeke grumbled, taking her advice. He settled himself back into position with his rifle, squaring his shoulders, but leaving his jaw loose, checking the wind and adjusting his position just slightly. He took a few deep breaths and pulled his finger back, using the magnifier to guide his shot.

“What the hell?” he muttered out, shock filtering onto his face. The bullet had made a clean bullseye. “Why are you always right?”

“I gotta go run the drill,” Faye had already started to take a step away from her twin, “But if you just keep at it, you’ll figure it out eventually.” She sent a bright smile up at her brother that left his heart fluttering, and he gave a curt nod, turning back to the gun range.

Gunshots rang out while the other kids took aim and fired, and just like his sister suggested, Zeke started chipping away at his shoddy gunman skills. When the instructor blew into his shrill whistle, he heaved himself away from his spot and over to the lineup of kids waiting to start the drill.

“Hey,” Faye tugged on his sleeve, easily getting his undivided attention. “The climbing wall has spikes on it,” she whispered, “So just be careful not to stab your hand accidentally.” She watched Zeke try to stutter out a response before his eyes caught on her bloodied hand. “Don’t worry about it, just don’t make the same mistake I did,” she advised, quickly teetering off to join the rest of the kids at the range.

“Jaeger!” the instructor yelled, bringing Zeke back to earth, “Get a move on; you’re up first!”

“Yes—yes, sir!” Zeke stammered, clumsily moving forward to start hopping over old tires filled with sludge.

Meanwhile, Faye’s eyes narrowed in dissatisfaction at the bullethole, and she pursed her lips while getting ready to aim again. Just as she had her shot lined up, a hand clamped over her shoulder, and Faye slammed the barrel of the rifle into their ribs, swivelling around to stare at the dumbass who startled her.

“What the hell, Faye?!” It was a boy a few months older than her, and he was clutching onto his ribcage as he took ragged breaths with a dark scowl.

“You shouldn’t have scared me like that,” Faye chewed her cheek, slinging the gun around her back and getting to her feet, “Next time, just call my name like everyone else does.” She had started unbuttoning the boy's shirt, and he let her. It was well known that Faye had experience dealing with patients at her father's hospital, and as a result, many of the kids often went to her when they hurt themselves.

“I was just going to ask what you told your brother earlier,” he glowered, letting the six-year-old carefully inspect the bruise.

“Take a few deep breaths and let me know if they hurt,” she ordered, prodding the rib. She felt his diaphragm contract while he sucked in a greedy gulp of air. When he said nothing, Faye carefully felt around the area, nodding to herself. “Just bruised. You’re lucky I didn’t hit you harder.”

“So, are you going to tell me?” The boy had already started buttoning up his shirt again.

“No. Now piss off so I can get back to practice,” she snipped, going to spin on her heel, but she was pushed forward, tackled to the ground. She quickly rolled onto her back, holding her arms out defensively while she watched the boy bring his arm back, ready to take a swing at her nose.

It was all instinctual, really. The way Faye’s hand darted out, jamming her fingers right into where the boy’s shoulder met his chest — the brachial plexus— and as his fist came down, the boy’s face had turned from annoyed to panicked as his hand and forearm went numb, weakly slamming into the girl’s cheek.

“What the hell?” he muttered, trying to flex his fingers while still straddling Faye. “Why is my hand—”

Faye didn't waste any time pushing the boy off her, using his panicked state to her advantage. He was pathetic if he really thought he could land a half-decent hit on her.

“You’ll regain mobility in a few hours, but you should probably lay off any heavy-duty work,” she haphazardly suggested, as though it were an afterthought.

“What did you do to my arm?” He tried again, scrambling to his feet. “Why can’t I move it?”

“Go see the medic on standby,” Faye snapped, turning and settling into her seat again. Whatever the boy did next wasn't her problem. She slid the rifle back over her chest, aiming like she’d done a thousand times before.

Deep breath in, deep breath out, unclench the jaw, loosen the shoulder muscles, straighten her back out, focus on the target, and gently pull—

Perfect shot.

So she worked on her speed and accuracy for the remainder of the half-hour, drilling it all into her head. If she were still alive in twenty years, she’d remember the exact muscle memory: how to align the shot in case of wind, how to focus on the target with the magnifier, and how to relax her body just enough to get the bullet exactly where she needed.

When the instructor blew his whistle again, Faye found Zeke, and they made their way to the institution together. It was a large building, mostly cement and stone pillars. It looked a lot more grandiose than it should have, with overarching doorways and solid oak doorways.

“Do you think they’re angry?” Zeke whispered, clutching tightly to Faye’s sleeve, “Mommy looked like she was going to cry, and dad…” His back gave an involuntary shudder.

“We’ve got gun assembly and dismantling next,” Faye quietly replied, trying her best to push Zeke’s words to the back of her mind. “Don’t think about their reactions, or your hands will start getting clammy. Focus on getting through the day, and when this lesson ends, we’ll deal with mom and dad,” she ordered.

“But how?” Zeke stressed, “Dad looked so angry I—”

“Jaeger!” came the drill sergeants bark. He stormed towards the pair, and the twins’ backs stiffened at the displeased scowl he wore, “Which one of you runts put Muller in the infirmary?” Faye noted that spit had started accumulating in the corners of his mouth, and she couldn’t help the disgusted curl her lips took. The man was revolting.

“I did, sir,” Faye confessed, “He tackled me and was going to assault me.”

“Next time, finish the job.” The instructor's voice had gone dangerously low, a menacing scowl pulling his lips down.

Had he just said what she thought he did?

“Of course, sir.” She tried to sound convincing and stoic: like the perfect soldier, and when he gave a curt nod, spinning on his heel and disappearing around the corner, Zeke snatched Faye’s sleeve again with wide eyes.

“Did he just tell you to kill Muller?” there was a disbelieving tone in his voice, hinting at the incredulousness of it all.

“Let’s just get this stupid lesson done and over with,” Faye growled. “I want to finish my birthday gift for you.” She pulled Zeke along with her into the classroom, and took a seat next to her brother, patiently waiting for the lesson to start.

“Seriously, Faye,” Zeke whispered. “What’d you do?”

“He was going to break my nose and I just…” She let out a frustrated breath. “I don’t know. My muscle memory kicked in and I hit a pressure point in his neck, and now he can’t move his arm for a few hours.” It sounded dumb when she said it aloud, but Faye didn't know how else to word the sentence.

“What do you mean he can’t use his arm?” Zeke hissed. “Where’d you even learn that from? I don’t think I’ve ever even heard of something like that.”

“Dad was showing me all the different pressure points a few weeks ago, and he was showing me how to hit them all.” She rubbed her temple, trying to shut out the dull throbbing that had started.

“It’s freaky how much information you absorb, Faye,” Zeke’s eyes stared at the desk dejectedly. “I wish I could do that. You’re like a sponge.”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Zeke,” she sighed. “I’m just interested in what dad does to people; it’s cool.”

“It’s gross,” Zeke corrected, his brows furrowing. “Did you see how much blood he had on himself when he got home yesterday?” He pursed his lips. “It was insane. I didn’t even know someone could bleed that much.”

“He was stitching someone up. People tend to bleed when they have gaping holes in their body.”

“Hey,” Zeke’s brows knit together, and he pulled Faye’s hand onto the desk to inspect it. “Speaking of, how’s your hand doing? When did you have time to bandage it all up like this?”

He examined the neat gauze, carefully taking in the square knot and the stench of rubbing alcohol. “And where’d you get the disinfectant?”

“Just after I spoke to you,” she admitted. “And I’ve always got supplies on me. You should ask dad about basic first aid sometime; it might come in handy.”

Faye internally swore when she saw the heavy dip on Zeke's lips and how disappointed he looked. How could she have forgotten that Zeke and Grisha didn't exactly see eye to eye?

Just before Faye could open her mouth to give some kind of reassurance, the door opened, and in marched their grumpy instructor. He was a no-nonsense kind of guy, and the entire class went silent when he took his place at the front of the room.

“Dahlia Arner,” he called, “You’re up first.” And so started the hour of watching everyone take apart their gun and put it back together like it was some sort of puzzle. It was morbid, really. Everyone quietly waited their turn, anxious to try and get the highest score and earn bragging rights.

When Faye’s name was called, she completed the task with an air of nonchalance and ease, picking apart the gun in record time before puzzling it all back together. When she looked up to hear her score, she listened to the class groan. It was good, faster than any of the other kids could do, at least.

Zeke went up next, and Faye could tell he was buckling under the pressure. He hadn’t even started, but his hands were shaking, barely managing a convincing salute. When the instructor gave the word to begin, Zeke crumbled, and the magazine went flying down to the floor while he stared at it in shame, lips gaping open and eyes wide.

When Zeke bent to reach a trembling hand for the magazine, he caught the instructor's eye, and all Faye could do was watch in horror as the adult’s boot came stomping down.Faye could only cringe when she heard the snap of one of Zeke’s fingers.

Needless to say, Zeke was excused for the rest of the lesson.

*

“I just couldn’t—” Zeke tried, but his voice got caught on the back of his throat, and he used his free hand to bury his face in his hands. “You didn’t see dad’s face. He looked so,” He paused, shame filling him to the brim, “disgusted with me, like his own son couldn’t do anything right.”

Faye was wrapping gauze over Zeke’s finger and a pencil as a makeshift splint, and when she snuck a glance up, she felt her world teetering. “That bad?” was all she could manage. She knew the exact look; Dina had given it to her a few too many times already.

“I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die,” Zeke mumbled.

“Hey now,” came a voice, and when Zeke whipped his head up to meet kind eyes framed by round glasses, a grin broke out onto his face. “I watched you today; you did pretty well during the drill.” It was Mr. Ksaver, the current holder of the Beast Titan.

“You think so?” The switch in attitude was so fast that Faye had to blink a few times.

“Yeah, it’s a shame your parents didn’t stick around to watch,” Mr. Ksaver praised, “They would have been so proud that you were the only cadet who tactfully evaded the nails on the climbing wall.”

“Well,” Faye cut in, standing quickly, “This is all done, so I’m heading to the library.” She wasn’t sure what made her feel so uncomfortable while in the presence of both Zeke and Mr. Ksaver, but it made her stomach curdle. Like she was encroaching on a private conversation. “When mom and dad get here, do you mind letting me know?”

“How come you never stay?” Zeke whined, oblivious to his sister’s discomfort.

“I just—” Faye chewed her lip, trying to look to the adult for help, but his eyes were just as curious as Zeke’s. “I feel like you need an adult in your life, and I want to give you some alone time, that’s all.” She came out looking small, but at least she was blunt, and her feelings couldn’t get misconstrued. A heartbeat passed, and the young girl quickly averted her eyes, choosing instead to stare down at her combat boots. “Anyways, I’m heading off now.”

She started down the small alleyway, steps rushed and awkward, eager to get herself to somewhere quiet where she could think about the day by herself, maybe cry a bit if she could find somewhere private enough.

The library was old and dusty, and the kids rarely ever used it. It was just as grand as the rest of the building, but it was just...covered in dust, tucked away in a corner, and forgotten by seemingly everyone except Faye.

She padded over to the far left corner where the medical books were kept.She picked one at random, settling into her usual seat at the desk in the corner as she let her mind focus on the words.

It had only been a few minutes of Faye reading up on pneumothorax and its treatments when the door quietly opened and Faye’s drill sergeant strolled in.

The man was tall. Earlier, when he’d worn a hard look and a scowl, he looked terrifying, but now he just looked tired. When he took a seat across from Faye, rubbing his temple as though he had a headache, Faye couldn’t help but tilt her head, and the words slipped out of her mouth with ease.

“You should try some melatonin.” It was a simple suggestion. Her father had explained where the body created its own melatonin, and how some people didn’t produce enough. He went into great detail about a supplement that could help.

“Come again?” the drill sergeant questioned, eyes narrowed and brows pinched. It felt bizarre to hear him speak in a tone that wasn’t barking out orders every few seconds, and Faye stilled at the sound of it.

“You look tired,” she started slowly, “Dark circles, sunken eyes—” irritable, “And you aren’t yelling,” she explained, keeping careful not to offend the adult. “I was just saying that you should try taking some melatonin. It’ll help you sleep at night.” Faye couldn’t be sure, but she thought she saw something akin to amusem*nt flash in his eyes, and his lips twitched for a split second.

“I’ll look into it, Jaeger,” he assured, and when his eyes flickered down to the open book, recognition filtered into his face. “Med book, huh?” he asked. “That explains why you know so much about medicine.”

“Actually,” Faye corrected. “My dad is a doctor, and I like going with him to work.” The sergeant didn’t say anything, so Faye continued, sensing the casualness of the conversation. “Last month, he had me working on stitching patients up, and this month we’re working on illnesses related to the heart and lungs and what to do in emergencies.”

“That so?” His finger drummed on the table, watching the cadet in front of him nod. “I was actually on my way to inform you that you'll be out on the field starting tomorrow.”

Faye choked and her eyes snapped up to meet his. “All due respect, sir, you can’t just spring that on a child,” she said tightly, “I don’t think I want to go.”

His eyes hardened, and in an instant, he had stood up to his full height, whatever tired lines his face previously held disappearing. “That’s an order. It will be just like sharpshooting class, but you’ll be hitting moving targets.”

“Living targets,” Faye angrily corrected, also hopping off her chair to stand. “Other humans—” The soldiers who came back to base flashed in Faye’s head, and they all wore the same hollow look—like the life had been drained out of them.

“Too f*cking bad, Jaeger. That command came from my superiors; they’re all invested in seeing you perform on the field.” She licked her lips, narrowing her eyes at the new information. Were they seriously considering her for inheriting a titan? Already? “Be at the base by 8:00 am, and don’t be late.”

She watched his back while he retreated, and after a second, she calmly put the book back where she’d gotten it from and pulled out some thread, a needle, and some fabric. She pretended the material was skin, the needle was curved, and that the knots she was tying were sutures because that was all she could do to keep from crying. Just keep moving her hand in and out in a methodical tempo.

She tried to think about hers and Zeke’s birthday was in a few days, and she’d be seven, but the intrusive thoughts kept sifting in. If she made it to her birthday, Faye would be a killer, a murderer. She would have blood on her hands that could never be washed away.

“I’m not scared,” she huffed out quietly, “And I’m not going to sit here and cry like a baby.” She could feel her eyes burning. “And I’m not going to die, and I’m not going to feel guilty. None of that,” Faye whispered, still needling the fabric. It was starting to take form, and after a few minutes, she pulled out some cotton and stuffed it into the small hole. “And I’m going to do this all for the Eldians because they deserve rights too.”

She felt the tear slide down her cheek, but she reminded herself that this was nothing in comparison to what the Eldians had to go through— what they were all going through now.

Meanwhile, Grisha and Dina stared down at Zeke’s pitiful excuse of an apology.

“I’ll find Faye,” Grisha decided, needing some more time away from his son to keep from blowing up. He was swift as he walked away from his son, not sparing a second glance. He could hear Dina trying to console Zeke, but he just couldn’t bring himself to follow her stead. Not yet.

So he went to find his other child. The child who constantly amazed him with her performance in the Warrior Program and his hospital. She had only been learning about his line of work for two years, but she was already better at stitching the wounded than half his nurses were. She could even correctly diagnose most common illnesses.

She was a true prodigy.

Grisha Jaeger strolled into the library, fully expecting to find his Faye hunched over one of the medical books studying hard. However, as he neared the section his daughter usually frequented, he felt his heart drop and a chill run through him when he heard tiny sobs coming from the corner of the room.

“Faye?” he called, rushing over to her usual spot. She was clutching tightly to a small monkey plushy while tears streamed down her face uncontrollably. “Sweetheart,” he kneeled next to her chair, letting his hand rest on the small of her back while she sniffled. “What’s wrong?” His heart was contracting painfully inside his chest, and the longer he watched his pride and joy cry, the more he felt like an awful parent.

“Why does it have—have to be me?” She leaned into Grisha’s chest, letting him wrap his arms around her. “I’m—I’m going into the—the trenches and—” The trenches? But wasn’t that dangerous? She would be getting shot at. “And I—I don’t know what to do.”

“What do you want to do?” Grisha softly asked, rubbing small circles onto his daughter’s back.

“The Eldians, I—I need to do my best to help them,” it came out feebly, and she shuddered in a breath. “I can’t— you told me that Zeke and I had to free them.”

“That’s right,” Grisha agreed. “So that means that whatever happens tomorrow, you need to make sure you keep yourself alive,” Slowly, Faye started to take deeper breaths, and she wiped the tears away, though they were still brimming in her eyes.

“But what about all those people I’m going to kill?” she asked. “I can’t— can’t just take a life.”

“Save twice as many people then,” the older man suggested. “Save them all with your own hands.” She sniffled again, staring up at Grisha with wide, cognizant eyes. “You can start working shifts at the hospital on your days off.”

“But what about Zeke—”

“Zeke needs to learn how to work independently,” Grisha gently cut in. “He’s old enough now that he shouldn’t be relying on you to get him through the drills. Today was…” How would he describe today? “Unacceptable, and Dina and I will need to start working him harder at home.”

“He’s trying his best,” Faye tried to say, “He was just so nervous because you and mom were there—”

“That’s no excuse,” Grisha’s lips had settled into a fine line and Faye knew better than to argue.

She hung her head, giving a nod, and she moved to shove Zeke’s birthday gift into her bag before she followed her father out.

Dina gave her daughter a small, reassuring smile while she stood holding Zeke’s hand, and as they began the walk home, she started asking the twins how their day had gone.

“Faye is joining the soldiers in the trenches,” Grisha voiced from beside her. “She’s moving along quite nicely.”

“What?” Dina’s eyes shot up furiously to stare at her husband in partial shock. “But she’s not even seven yet. How is she supposed to make it out alive?” Dina’s fair blonde hair flew when she spun to look at Faye, and she tried her best to soften her eyes, “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“No,” Grisha interrupted. “She does. She’ll be charged with treason for abandoning her position.”

“Hey,” Zeke tugged on Faye’s sleeve, demanding that she rip her attention away from their arguing parents. “When did this happen? How come you didn’t tell me?”

“Our drill sergeant came into the library while you were with Mr. Ksaver,” Faye whispered back guiltily. “I was going to tell you when you came to get me, but dad found me first.” She tried not to think too hard about tomorrow, and she dryly added, “I finished your gift, by the way. I’m going to give it to you when we get home.”

Faye tried to convince herself that she wasn’t giving Zeke the gift just because the possibility of her death the next day was looming and threatening, but she felt the familiar twinge of her conscience screaming at her lies.

“I didn’t get you yours yet, though,” Zeke muttered out. “And I had a perfect idea and everything...”

“Worry about it for when our birthday rolls around,” Faye smoothly suggested. “I just know we’re going to get the lecture of our lives when we get home, so you might as well have something to look forward to.”

“We?” Zeke grinned.

“I can’t let you listen to mom and dad argue alone. You’ll probably sit there and beat yourself up,” Faye pointed out, a small smile tugging on her lips.

*

“Dammit! This is bullsh*t!” Grisha screamed before something crashed against the floor from the kitchen, probably one of Dina’s good china plates.

“He sounds furious,” Zeke murmured, staring down at his hands from the floor beside his bed.

“Don’t talk like that,” Dina chastised. “We need to support him— them,” Another crash. “He’s—They’re trying their best, can’t you see?”

“How many plates do you figure we’ll have by the end of this?” Faye joked from beside him, grabbing her backpack.

“Their best— His best isn’t good enough!” Faye could just imagine how red Grisha’s face was. He probably had that vein on his neck sticking out too. “He’ll never become a warrior like that!”

“Here,” Faye tugged on Zeke’s sleeve. “Close your eyes. I’m going to give you your gift now.”

“What?” Zeke stammered. “Like right now? But they’re yelling about me.”

“Close your eyes. It might as well brighten your day, one way or another,” she had already started rummaging around in her bag, and when she snuck a glance over, she was pleasantly surprised by Zeke holding his hand out patiently. He felt the weight of something being placed into his waiting hands, and when he opened his eyes, his heart swelled with love and admiration.

There, sitting in his hands, was a neatly stitched monkey plushy. It wasn’t the nicest, but he could tell Faye had put a lot of work into it, going as far as to use two different colours of brown to add detail, and she had embroidered its eyes, nose, and smile. The sides looked like they’d been neatly sutured shut, but it added character.

“You—” Zeke’s burning eyes shot up to look at Faye, eyes wide and brimming with tears. “Why would you—”

“Neat, huh?” Faye grinned. “I saw you were looking at one like it at the store a few weeks ago, so I decided to make it for you.”

His head bobbed up and down, and his throat clenched. Whatever words he wanted to say got caught in his throat, and a tear slid down his cheek while he stared down at the soft stuffed animal.

Before Faye knew it, Zeke had lunged for her, wrapping his arms around her shoulders while he cried, and after a few seconds, she felt tears streaming down her own face, and they lay on the floor sobbing together, though for wildly different reasons.

“Kids?” It was Dina, standing in the doorway and staring down at her two children, who clung to each other as though their lives depended on it. “Grisha, come quick! It’s the twins,” she called, quickly getting down to her knees. “What’s wrong, is one of you hurt?”

“What are you talking about?” Grisha grumbled, stepping into the room, but he froze the second he saw his kids. “Oh my god, Dina, what happened?”

“We’re fine,” Zeke sobbed. “We’re okay.” He could feel Faye’s tears through his shirt, and her head was nestled into his shoulder. “We just—” They were just what? What was he supposed to say? “We’re just crying, that’s all.”

“What’s gotten into you two?” Dina asked, placing a comforting hand on Zeke’s back, gently trying to prompt him to open up.

“It’s nothing. Faye is just—” He sniffled. “She’s just—Just so cool.”

Grisha co*cked his head to the side, he’d never seen either of them this emotional, and that was twice now in one day for Faye. For a split second, he wondered if this was too much responsibility to put on his kids. But the thought was fleeting, and as soon as it came, he’d rejected it. No. They were Eldia’s saviours. Zeke and Faye were going to save them all, and in Grisha’s blind faith in The Owl, he really believed he was doing the right thing.

“Did you…” Faye wiped her eyes with her sleeve, releasing a shaky breath, “Did you need something?” She tried desperately to pull herself together, but the more she tried to force a smile on her face, the heavier the tears dropped.

“I was just coming in to tell you that dinner was ready,” Dina said, raking her hand softly through Faye’s hair.

“Do we even have any plates to eat with?” Faye grinned through the tears; her mother’s face was blurry, and she couldn’t tell if she looked scornful or amused. “Or did dad break them all?”

“I think we’ll manage with what we have,” Grisha dryly replied, his lips pulled into a thin line, though his eyes flashed in adoration.

Chapter 3: 02.

Chapter Text

It had been a month since Faye’s first time in the trenches.

A month of being subjected to sh*tty weather, of being covered in mud and grime, of blowing out snot laced with dirt, of fearing for her life every time she moved positions. It was hell and, by the end of the month, Faye felt like she wanted to die. If someone shot a bullet her way, she didn’t think she had the heart to worry about it.

She came home on the weekends, and she usually spent them at her father’s hospital, trying to care for his patients. Since her newfound Warrior status, Faye had patched up her fair share of soldiers, and if her sutures had been shoddy before, they were damn well near perfect now.

And when Grisha watched Faye stitch one of his patients up, his eyebrows had raised at how efficient his seven-year-old daughter was when it came to medical dilemmas. She was quick to diagnose and prescribe medication, and when he double-checked, he never found a mistake.

Then, during her second weekend home, Faye told Grisha about how she had cauterized a wound with little more than some disinfectant, a blade, and a candle, preventing infection and saving her comrade’s life.

It amazed Grisha as much as it worried him. So on the fourth weekend, he sent Faye away, telling her to spend some time with her brother down at the Warrior’s HQ. The boy had been waiting for an afternoon to spend with his sister, and when she finally told him she had the day free, he leaped at the opportunity.

That was how Zeke found himself wiping down the windows while Faye swept the floor, carefully getting rid of all the dust.

“How’s training going?” Faye asked, sweeping a pile of dirt onto the dustpan. “Are you getting any better?”

Zeke blew out a heavy sigh, pausing in his motions to watch the solvent slowly drip down the glass. “Yeah, but mom and dad are getting more and more distant, and I’ve been spending a lot of time with grandma and grandpa.”

“More?” Faye’s brows furrowed, “What about when they are home? Does dad ever want to spend some time with you?” She knew the answer in the pit of her stomach, but she needed to hear Zeke say it so she could say something to her father. Maybe convince him to ease up on his expectations for Zeke.

“No, nothing,” Zeke’s hand glided over the bubbles, getting rid of all the streaks. “And when he does, all he wants to do is study.”

“Why don’t you ask to help out in the clinic?” Faye suggested, “Whenever I go, dad always looms over my shoulder to make sure I’m doing things right.” It was a lie. He had stopped doing that two weeks before, and now he skimmed over her files haphazardly.

“You know I’m no good at that stuff,” Zeke muttered, “He’d probably just get more upset than anything, and he’s been extra grumpy lately.” He squinted, checking for any fine lines he left behind. “Probably has to do with his extracurricular activities.”

Faye narrowed her eyes, attacking a corner and ridding it of all the built-up dust and dirt. “Yeah, I’ve noticed that he’s been extra tense too.” She started sweeping it all out into the open. “What about mom? Is she any better?”

“A little,” Zeke confessed, moving onto another windowpane. “She’s more affectionate, but she’s pretty stressed too, and I think my lack of progress is starting to irritate her.”

“It’s okay. Every time mom sees me, she looks like she wants to cry and throw up at the same time,” she quietly confessed. “I think it’s sinking in that I’ve killed people, and I don’t think she’ll ever be able to look at me the same.” It was true; every time Faye tried to smile or make conversation with Dina, the latter always seemed jumpy, and her eyes held something between disdain and disgust for her daughter.

“At least you became a Warrior,” Zeke grumbled, staring at Faye’s armband. It reminded him of Mr. Ksaver.

“It's…” Faye hesitated, knitting her brows together while her lips pulled into a fine line. How was she supposed to describe her life in the trenches? “It’s not all you think it’s cracked up to be,” she settled. “You’re dirty all the time, and everyone smells like crap, and there are a hundred injuries that nobody knows how to treat except for me.” She kept her mouth shut about all the blood and death; he didn't need to know about it yet. He was still innocent.

“You don’t look the same anymore,” Zeke trailed off, canting his head at his sister, trying to figure out what it was that had changed about her.

Faye said nothing. She knew exactly what it was. It was the pressure of war and all the guilt and shame she carried. She looked like a shell of herself, and every time Faye passed by a mirror, she barely recognized the person staring back.

“Do you mind if I head home early?” Faye suddenly asked. “I just want to take a nap. After dinner, maybe we can get some ice cream together and go for a walk around the pond.”

“Yeah, I just need to mop up,” Zeke waved his hand. “I’ll meet you back at home,” he dismissed. Zeke whistled to himself, watching Faye put away the broom and dustpan before he went in search of a mop and bucket.

He wiped the sweat off his brow as he looked at the dampened floors, satisfied with his work. He felt better after talking to Faye because maybe, just maybe, this was for the best. The trenches sounded awful, so even if he couldn’t leave the internment zone, at least he’d still be alive. Mr. Ksaver didn’t sound too pleased about being a part of the Warriors either, come to think of it.

He pulled on the handle of the bucket, lifting it and making his way down the hall to put everything away.

“We finally pinned ‘em down,” came a voice from behind a door, but Zeke paid no mind to it; it was none of his business. “They call themselves the Eldian Restorationists.” His spine froze, and the hair on the nape of his neck stood up.

“It’s a pretty large group,” chimed another voice. “Apparently, it was formed by a traitor called ‘The Owl.’ Our people are looking into several leads as we speak.”

Zeke’s head was starting to spin. He knew that name well; The Owl was the person who gave his parents— and therefore him— orders and knowledge. They were all going to be found out.

“It’s just a matter of time; we’ll get the proof we need.”

The day passed by in a blur. Zeke couldn’t remember if he had even put the mop away, and when he got home, he stared at his desk until dinner was ready, where he sat and stared at his dinner plate, too lost in thought about what he had heard earlier.

“Zeke?” Dina called, breaking the boy's concentration, “Is something wrong?” She stared at her son with motherly concern, and Zeke swallowed the lump in his throat. “Why aren’t you eating your supper?”

“My… my stomach hurts,” he lied, glancing from his mom to his dad, then he took a sharp inhale. His father looked suspicious, and he grunted in disapproval. “I’m sorry,” he averted his eyes, not able to bear the brunt of Grisha’s inevitable sharp gaze, “But please, stop going out and doing dangerous things.” He could hear his mom gasp in surprise, but he couldn’t stop himself. Their lives were on the line. Faye’s life was on the line.

“Look, if you get caught, we’ll all get sent to the Island of Devils,” he took another deep breath, “First, they’ll ship us to Paradis; then they’ll make us titans.”

“Have you somehow managed to learn nothing from me after all this time?” Grisha quietly questioned, though his calm voice was nothing to take lightly. If he got riled up enough, Grisha would start to yell, and after he was blue in the face came the hitting. “Unless someone takes a stand, our people will be doomed to live pitiful lives, trapped in this tiny cage forever.”

“Yes, that’s right,” Dina agreed, face lined in seriousness, “We’re fighting to create a dignified future for Eldian people everywhere, including you and your sister.”

Zeke’s heart was hammering in his chest, but there was no turning back now. “But would you still say that if you knew I could end up like Aunt Faye?”

Zeke jumped when Grisha’s hands slammed down on the table and leaped to his feet, knocking his chair to the ground.

“Dammit, Zeke,” he shouted. “You know the only reason Faye isn’t alive now—” It felt weird for Grisha to say Faye’s name and not think of his daughter. “— is because the world is such a sick and twisted place.” Zeke swallowed again, the air getting stuck in his throat. “We need to fight and fix the world so that no one else will ever have to meet her fate again— least of all your sister,” God forbid anything happen to Faye. She had survived this long, and she was a natural prodigy when it came to medical work. “That’s why we’re determined to win our rights back.”

“Hey, what’s all the ruckus?” came a sleepy voice from the doorway. There, clad in shorts and a shirt, stood Faye, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. “Don’t tell me you guys are ganging up on Zeke again.”

Grisha choked on his saliva.

“Ganging up?” he questioned. “Your brother should know better than to ask me to stop meeting with the restorationists,” Grisha snapped, waking Faye up immediately.

“Don’t get mad at me too,” Faye met his tone evenly, crossing her arms. “Zeke is just worried for you. You two don’t spend enough time with him, and he misses his parents.” She spoke like an adult despite only being seven, and Dina’s eyes widened.

“Don’t spend enough time with him?” Dina asked. “We do everything for him!”

“Maybe if one of you took Zeke out to play catch and reassure him you still love him, he wouldn’t feel so left out,” she pointed out, “Look, I need to head back in the morning, so I’m going back to bed. Don’t bother saying goodbye unless you’ve made up with Zeke.” She spun on her heel and returned to her room.

A tense silence clouded over dinner, no one daring to speak a word.

*

Faye found herself stuck in a place that was little more than a barren wasteland. The ground was muddy, and the sun was scorching. It had rained the night before, and the trenches the men had dug out a few days earlier had started to flood. Her clothes were covered in crusted-over dirt, but that was the least of Faye’s concerns.

“Get down!” a soldier screamed from beside her, tackling her to the ground just as a grenade flew overhead. She heard it whistle before she felt the sweltering heat blow her and the soldier away from the explosion, and when she shook her head to get her bearings, the soldier was lying on top of her, having used himself as a human shield from the blast.

“Hey, talk to me,” Faye ordered, rolling him over. He had to be in his early twenties, but the war had done him no favours. There were dark creases running around his forehead and mouth, accentuated by the dirt that had accumulated in his wrinkles. His eyes looked distant, but he took a ragged breath.

Faye swore when she saw his back. It was all burned to a literal crisp, and if the blackened skin told her anything, he wasn’t going to make it.

“Give me your name,” Faye tried again, shaking his shoulder to try and get his attention. He was looking at something over her shoulder, reaching for it. “Hey,” Faye snapped, moving to block his view. “I need a name to find your family.”

He mumbled something out, coughing up thick blood. “Alex-an-der,” He gritted out, another shallow breath moving his chest up, “Du-or-ko.”

“Listen,” Faye took a look over her shoulder. The trench was too far away to try and pull him back without getting caught in the crossfire. “Do you have a message for your family? I’ll get it to them.”

Another grenade shot overhead, landing far off in the distance while gunshots exploded out from around Faye. She heard the shouts of soldiers and superiors barking out orders, but she paid them no mind, too focused on Alexander.

He couldn’t get the words out as another coughing fit overtook him, and he seized up, going stiff. His hand shakily reached into his pocket, forcing a piece of paper into Faye’s hand.

“Go.”

It was a simple command, but it had Faye rapidly nodding while she dove for cover, another wave of bullets narrowly missing her. She supposed it was because the enemy was used to dealing with adults, and her tiny body was a smaller target.

She chanced a glance from behind a large rock. Two sharpshooters on either side of the tower and soldiers lined up on the bridge with machine guns and explosives.

She settled in on the ground. She had done this a hundred times before, so there was no reason to fail now. She angled her gun out from a crevice on the rock, lining her shot up and adjusting due to wind. She took a deep breath in and forced her jaw to unclench, squaring her shoulders and pulling the trigger—

Perfect shot.

She heard the men hollering at each other, and she saw them point in her general direction, but she forced herself to ignore it. She’d managed to go an entire month without getting too cut up, and she wasn’t going to start now. She angled her rifle again, narrowing her eyes at the second sharpshooter who looked to be lining a shot directed at her.

Faye repeated her process, and when her finger squeezed the trigger, she watched the man drop like a fly, red dribbling down his forehead. She pursed her lips. That was number 208. Two hundred and eight soldiers she’d killed off because of a war she knew nothing about.

“Jaeger!” called a lieutenant from one of the tanks. “Retreat immediately.”

“Sir,” she called over the gunshots, “I can take them out—”

“Retreat! That was an order!” Shouted the insistent lieutenant. He looked livid about Faye questioning his orders, so she slung the rifle around her back, peeking out to take a look at the heavy machine artillery before she sprinted, diving headfirst into the trench. She watched a ginormous figure leap overhead on all fours, easily covering the four-metre-wide hole in a single jump.

She’d never seen the Cart Titan in action before, but now that she had a front-row seat, it was like her eyes were glued to it. They, for the most part, looked like any other titan— not that Faye had ever seen one of those either— but its face was horribly disfigured, having been gruesomely elongated into a demonic snout. It held cannons, artillery, and heavy explosives on its back, carrying soldiers who manned the weapons.

When Faye peeked over the trench, she watched in horror as the soldiers on its back launched heavy-duty explosives at the fortress before it all crumbled, and then she heard the cries and screams.

It was the enemy, but Faye felt her heart clench at their death throes, yelling out because they had nothing left to lose. She turned away, screwing her eyes shut and ducking back down into the trench, sliding down the mud and into the cool murky water.

The screams were echoing, and some morbid sliver of her soul recognized the sound. It was shrill, and it pierced through her resolve like a flaming arrow. Their cries were filled with anguish and red hot fury. They were only protecting their land, so why…why did Marley need to invade like that? It was brutal, and they’d massacred an entire fleet of soldiers, for what? So they had more land to build their stupid colonies on?

“Hey,” A hand clamped onto her elbow, pulling Faye’s butt out of the water. “Stop crying. The general is on his way, and he’ll be pissed if he sees you like this.” Whoever it was had his eyes shadowed by thick, greasy hair, and he looked to be in just as bad condition as Faye felt.

“Sorry,” it sounded disembodied when Faye spoke, “I’ll get my act together, I swear. It’s just—”

“Save it for someone who gives two sh*ts,” they grunted, “You want a cig? It’ll help stop the tears.” He didn’t notice Faye’s tilted head while she squinted up at him through bleary eyes.

“What kind of adult offers a seven-year-old nicotine?” she asked, though she still reached her hand out, plucking a cigarette and letting him light it, just to satiate her curiosity. He said nothing and instead watched Faye take a sharp inhale before she coughed involuntarily, the smoke catching in her throat. The more she puffed, the more acclimated she got to it, though, and within the two minutes it took for her to finish her cigarette, she had indeed calmed down a notch.

“So why’re you here?” he asked, taking a heavy drag. “Your parents don’t love you or somethin’?” He spoke lazily, skipping the end letters of his words, and the small beard he had was covered in mud.

“They just have high hopes,” Faye shrugged, “Want to be honorary Marleyans.” She threw the cigarette butt into the muddy water, watching it fizzle out before she let out a sigh. “I just want to make it to the end of the week, you know?”

She wasn’t sure what it was about adults, but they were almost always easier to talk to than kids. Somehow, they knew exactly what she was trying to say even when she couldn't find the words.

The soldier hummed. “You gonna give that letter to Al’s boyfriend?” he inquired, a fine brow raised at the child.

“Boyfriend?” Faye questioned, “Like a relationship?” She’d known about a woman and a man dating, but she’d never heard of two same-gendered people committing to each other.

“Why not?” he gruffly questioned, flicking some ash away, “If you love someone, then that’s all there is to it.” He took another long drag, taking in Faye’s curious head tilt. “Love is love. Simple as that.”

“Love is love,” Faye repeated quietly, the words tossing around in her head, “I never thought of it like that.” It had always seemed like the only reason to get married was to have kids, and she had never heard of a man and a man having children together, but maybe there were other ways, like adoption.

“So,” he coughed awkwardly, tossing his cigarette down to join Faye’s, “The letter?”

“Oh,” Faye’s eyes snapped up to his, “Yeah, I’ll get it to him,” she assured him, though she frowned a half-second later.

“Well?” The man impatiently held out a hand, and it was then that she realised he was Alexander Duorko’s lover. She hastily dug the letter out of her pocket, handing it over immediately. She left quickly after; the man probably needed some alone time.

She waded her way down and over to their makeshift camp, nestling near a tree. None of the other soldiers bothered her much, so she took that as a sign that they didn’t want to babysit her. Faye’s eyes trailed over the soldiers, and briefly, she wondered if she looked like them, with the same hollowed-out expression and miserable thin lip. Some of them were missing limbs, and most had ugly, jagged scars marring their bodies. It was a wonder she had made it out relatively unscathed.

She pursed her lips at the long line leading out of the medical tent. It must have been a particularly straining day for everyone.

It was odd when Faye looked at the other soldiers, who were all at least eighteen —she was the only odd duck. They all seemed so cognizant of the situation, grasping and tearing lives away like it was just another day at the office. But when Faye did the same, she had to dissociate just to deal with the trauma, pushing her feelings to the back of her mind as though they were a disgrace. Then, when she did get a lucid thought about the death and the blood, she had to ram it back out until she got home so that she didn’t have a nervous breakdown in front of the more seasoned warriors.

The first week she had spent out on the field had been the worst. She couldn’t hold down any food and probably looked like a blubbering mess to the rest of them. Whenever they risked a look down at Faye, they were quick to avert their eyes, like she wasn’t even worthy of a head pat.

“General says you’re going back with him,” a gruff voice startled Faye, “He’s leaving in two minutes; get a move on.” They paid no attention to the seven-year-old who was scrambling up from her seat. She wasn’t due back for another two days, so why would they send her home early?

“Yes, sir,” she saluted, keeping her hand at her head until the soldier tsked and turned. She slumped and pulled her feet to start moving in the direction of the tank. Whatever the decision for sending Faye home early was, it couldn’t be good news.

Maybe Zeke had finally dropped out of the program, or maybe Grandma Jaeger had gotten sick and she was lying on her deathbed. It was possible Dina had gotten pregnant again too, or maybe Grisha needed immediate aid at the hospital.

“Jaeger, don’t just stand around. Get a f*cking move on!” snapped the general, head poking out the window of the massive military-grade vehicle.

She gave another salute, hopping into the backseat of the car next to the general. He was in his mid-forties, but his hair had already started greying and he had a wiry moustache that looked whiter than snow. Up until then, he hadn’t seemed to give two sh*ts about Faye, which was why when he turned to her with a concerned eye, she furrowed her brows.

“Faye,” his voice had come out soft, gentler than any of the other military personnel she had heard speak her name before. Something in the way his lips pulled down, bringing his thick moustache with it, and how his eyes abated from their usual tightness had Faye’s heart thrumming. Maybe he was just being nice because she was only a kid; that was always a possibility, right? “There have been some very serious accusations made against your family, and you’re being brought back to be interrogated about your involvement.”

A nervous laugh bubbled past Faye’s throat while she stared up at her general with incredulous eyes, “I’m sorry?”

“Jaeger, this is no laughing matter,” the general mumbled into his moustache, “If you don’t claim ignorance, you’ll be sent to the Devil's Island.”

“Sir, what even were the claims?” She tried to keep her head clear, but the argument she had walked in on the night before she left kept digging into her brain, and all she could think about was how Zeke had mentioned Paradis shortly after she had woken up and waddled into the kitchen to disrupt the verbal fight.

A heartbeat passed where the general awkwardly shifted in his seat, not daring to meet Faye’s inquisitive eyes, and her stomach fell into a pit.

“There are claims your parents are a part of a radical group bent on overthrowing the Marleyan government.” It had all come out in one full breath, and with the greedy gulp of air the general took in, Faye’s breath caught in her throat. “Impossible, right?” he chuckled, not noticing the blood draining from Faye’s face.

“Sir, I’d like to go home, if it’s all the same to you,” she managed a polite smile, but she kept her expression guarded under a thick veil, “My grandparents and brother are probably worried sick.” She had broken out into a cold sweat, and her leg had started shaking uncontrollably.

“Ah, yes,” the general’s lips twitched up into a relieved smile, “Zeke Jaeger is your twin, yes?” She gave a curt, numb nod. “Ironically, he’s been coming in last in all of his lessons,” There was a reluctant pause where the general wondered if it was appropriate to discuss her brother’s marks in his courses, “Ironic, considering you were top of the class.” The explanation was useless, but the general still felt inclined to add it since Faye's lips stayed frozen in their thin line

“And look where it’s gotten me,” Faye mumbled out, not quite able to smother the sarcasm. ‘Fighting a useless war while my parents are probably getting turned into titans.’ She didn’t dare say that out loud, though.

“Are you unhappy with your position in the military?” the general curiously asked, moustache bobbing up and down with every word. Apparently, he had no clue how insensitive his question was.

“No, sir,” Faye gritted out, “Just curious why I was promoted so early on.” It was a stupid excuse, but she still forced it out, hoping to appease whatever moronic part of the general she could.

“Well,” he gushed, slinging an arm around his soldier’s neck. She could faintly smell the alcohol on him, “It’s because we’re considering you as a candidate to inherit a titan, of course.” He grinned, letting his typical stoicism fall away with his newfound confidence and ease. He thought the seven-year-old would have leapt from her seat clapping, and when a tense second passed with no reaction from her, he frowned.

“I thought so,” Faye whispered, massaging the pads of his fingers into her temple. This was precisely where she was supposed to be in the grand scheme of her parents’ master plan, and she was about to throw it all away.

*

Grandma Jager was a sobbing mess when she pulled Faye through the doorway, fretting over the dried blood and crusted mud cloaking the seven-year-old’s figure. Faye’s grandparent’s house was exactly as she remembered it: smelling of cinnamon and carefully decorated to her grandparent’s tastes with lush plants littering the corners and ancient bookcases lining the walls.

“Faye, thank goodness you haven’t been caught up in this mess,” Mrs. Jaeger cried, kneeling on her frail knees and embracing her grandchild as though she would never get another chance to. “It’s awful; I can’t believe it myself.”

Faye let herself be wrapped up in her grandmother's arms, and when she finally let her go, Faye turned to the stoic figure in the kitchen doorway. She hugged her grandfather’s torso, leaning into the warmth. Mr. Jaeger let her, and he settled for patting her back awkwardly.

She said nothing and, after a minute, she peeled herself off, setting towards the stairs and marching into the spare bedroom. Zeke sat on the bed, staring down with tears in his eyes at the gift Faye had given him. He didn’t even flinch when the door opened.

“What the heck happened?” Faye quietly asked, closing the door behind her before she settled atop the bed next to Zeke, “I was back at camp for all of five minutes before the general pulled me into his crappy car and told me mom and dad were ratted out.” She patiently waited for her brother to speak up. After all, she had been patient on the five-hour journey home; she could wait a few minutes more.

“I…I had- had to,” Zeke stammered out, voice cracking on the last word while he furiously wiped his eyes with his sleeve. “At least this- this way us and Grandma and- and Grandpa could still- still be free.” He was gasping in between words while tears flooded down his cheeks.

Faye chewed her cheek, processing the information. It was smart, really. Too smart for Zeke to think of himself, which left one other person who could have suggested the situation: Mr. Ksaver. As much as Faye resented the man, she was equally as grateful. Zeke would hopefully make it out of this mess relatively unscathed. She had to act like an adult, for Zeke’s sake.

“I don’t blame you,” Faye reassured, “But I need to go with mom and dad.” She had made her decision long before she reached home, and there was no talking her out of it.

“What?” Zeke panicked, leaping to his feet and digging his nails into Faye’s hand, “No! You- you can’t,” Faye made no move to get up or pry her brother's fingers from her skin.She forced herself to take a deep breath. If there was one thing war had taught her, it was that panicking led to death and destruction, which was most certainly not the path she wanted Zeke meandering down.

“I know you did this for us,” her voice had gone quiet, and she gazed at her brother tenderly, pleading with him to just listen to her—because as usual, she was right.

“But I can’t just leave mom and dad like this,” she shuddered in a shallow breath, trying to smile, “I never even got to say goodbye, and I’ve killed too many people to live with myself comfortably.”

“Faye, I-I’ll,” Zeke’s eyes darted around the room, trying to look for some sort of threat, but they all paled in comparison to what he knew was going to be waiting for her on Paradis Island.

“I’ll be fine, Zeke,” Faye assured, tiredly getting to her feet, “Maybe when you inherit a titan, you’ll infiltrate the island, and on your way to the walls, you’ll pass by me.”

“You won’t be you,” he sobbed, engulfing Faye’s slight frame with his arms, “You’ll be a titan.”

“So will you,” Faye laughed humorlessly, unable to make light of the situation, “I’ll see you when it’s all done and over.” Her words did little to soothe her twin’s cries which wracked through his body violently. “If you can, abandon the mission. Do what you want to do for a change. Don’t throw your life away, like I have.”

“I- I can’t,” he uselessly shouted. “It’s all up to me now, and I don’t know how…how to handle—”

“Let Mr. Ksaver help you,” Faye suggested, gently manoeuvering herself out of Zeke’s arms, “He’s been such a wonderful role model for you when our parents couldn’t be, so let him in.”

“But why can’t you be my role model?” he stubbornly questioned.

“Because,” Faye ruffled his hair— something she’d never done before, “I’ve got the blood of two hundred and eight men on my hands, and I’d screw your life up more than mom and dad already have.”

“But you wouldn’t—”

“I really would, Zeke,” Faye cut in. Zeke blinked, and in horror, he swore he saw the lives of everyone Faye had shot and knifed down in the heat of battle in her eyes before they hollowed out, as if she was resigned to her untimely demise. Whatever innocence Faye once held had been gunned down the second she stepped onto the war-torn field, replaced with an emptiness in her eyes that he had only seen worn by traumatised adults.

“I can’t stay because I’d be too guilt-ridden and miserable. And as much as you and mom and dad argued, I still love them.” She stood on her tippy toes, giving her brother a soft forehead kiss, “Call me selfish, but I want you to start a new life where you get to carve out your future and find your own freedom.” She gave him an apologetic smile, "And you can't do that with your murderous sister loitering around in your life." She spun on her heel and left Zeke to stare at her retreating form.

The moment she started down the stairs, his heart crawled out of his throat, and he finally snapped back into action. “Faye, wait, I’m- I’m sorry.” His tiny legs carried him down and over to where his twin was halfway down the stairs, “I can’t– I need you, please don’t go.” He tried to snatch Faye’s hand, but she was faster— she was always faster, and she took the steps two at a time, evading Zeke’s frantic attempts at halting her movements.

“Zeke, I mean it. Let me die in peace.”

“I- I love you. Isn’t that enough?” he cried forlornly, breathing heavily on the second last stair, his hands balled into fists.

“Of course it is,” Faye slowly turned, her own cheeks tear-stained and blotchy, “But I can’t just abandon mom and dad like this. They’ve worked so long for their goal, and dad… He didn’t even say goodbye to me before I left for the field,” Her breaths came out shallow, and she felt lightheaded.

“So you’re going to abandon me?” he levelled.

“I’m sacrificing myself for you, Zeke,” Faye corrected, screwing her eyes shut when the image of her bullet-riddled body held by Zeke flitted intrusively into her mind, “I don’t want my body coming home in a casket and you having to plan my funeral.”

“So don’t die then,” he yelled incredulously, as though Faye really had a choice in the matter.

“Zeke, I love you,” Faye whispered hoarsely. “But I’ll die either way. Might as well speed up the process.” She swallowed the lump in her throat before she continued out the door and onto the street, her eyes narrowing in on the closest policeman.

She looked like sh*t, she knew she did, and when the police officer gave her a snide once over, she felt even worse. Maybe she should have at least showered before she turned herself in, like an inmate's last meal, scrubbing herself clean of the war.

“Sir,” her heart hammered in her chest and her palms had gone clammy. “My parents… They were just taken in under suspicion of being part of the Eldian Restorationists,” she said it all slowly, mostly because she could afford to rush through it all, “I’d like to turn myself in.”

“What?” the officer barked out a laugh, “You? You’re a kid. What the f*ck did you do?”

“I was supposed to infiltrate the Marleyan Army and rise through the ranks to act as a spy,” she said, deadpan, watching the amusem*nt die out on his expression and eyes falling on her yellow armband.

“Kid, this is a serious offence—”

“Sir, I was top of my class and I’ve already been stationed on the battlefield for them to judge my prowess. If you’d like me to stab you to prove my point, I will,” she clipped, “Just arrest me already. Get this done and over with.” She held her wrists out calmly while the officer clamped on some cuffs, warily eyeing the seven-year-olds movements.

Chapter 4: 03.

Chapter Text

Time always seemed to pass by differently when there wasn’t any way of telling how much had ticked by. Like it was all distorted and murky, and the clock's hands had started to turn in different directions.

She was underground somewhere, of that much Faye was sure. The only light sources were the outdated sconces littering the walls that cast long shadows around the cells. She had no clue how long she’d been there, but it had to have been at least three days. Three long, harrowing days that seemed to drag on with no end in sight.

“Stop,” Grisha tried to scream, but it came out as little more than a hoarse groan. It was sick, and every fibre in his body told him this was a worse fate than death,

“Don’t— She’s just a kid,” Dina whimpered pathetically from across the room, likely having caught eye contact with her daughter.

“Who is The Owl, little girl,” the officer taunted, voice taking on a jolly, singsong quality, mocking Faye for all she was worth. He had bent over Faye’s back, partially choking the seven-year-old, a sad*stic smile twisting his features when she tried to shake her head.

“I—I don’t know,” Faye tried, squirming against the man’s hips.

“More fun for me,” he tsked, leaning in to angle himself again. Faye grunted, her eyes screwing shut while the wind got lodged painfully in her throat. She had endured a war, but the second she’d been detained, it felt like she had finally entered Hell.

It smelled like a cesspool, piss and sh*t mixed in with the metallic scent of blood and the musk of sweat. Every kind of bodily fluid had already been spilled in the cell, with no exceptions, as Faye had come to quickly learn.

Grisha was, by far, the worst when it came to being tortured. His screams would reverberate around the cell. Faye would sometimes try to glance up at her father, but as soon as their eyes would meet, Faye could not stop immediately looking away in shame.

She could hear the man questioning her father again, and after a few seconds, his screams filled the room, tearing into Faye’s ears like wild dogs to a kill. Blood leaked from the spot where his index finger should have been, staining the dull blade and officer's fingers as he dangled the still warm appendage, turning to her with a sinister smile.

“No—” Faye murmured, shaking her head at the severed finger headed her way. “I don’t—please, no more.”

“Eat it,” the officer behind her hissed, fingers knotting into her hair to yank her head back. “You need to conserve your strength, don’t you?” He leered at her from his spot between her legs, not at all put off by the situation. She tried to shake her head again, but her act of disobedience was met with a harsh slap, the sound cracking in the air, while another officer pried her lips open and the finger was dropped in.

She threw up. Or, at least, she would have if her airways hadn’t been cut off.

She let out a feeble whimper, forcing her teeth to snap the bone and swallow the finger despite every bone in her body begging for it all to just end. She felt her stomach lurch again, and the severed digit came back up her throat.

“f*ck,” the soldier convulsed inside of her, breathing against Faye’s neck. “Do that again.”

"Please," Faye grunted when he slammed in again, eyes screwing shut at the soul-splitting pain. "Just chop my fingers off, please."

"You're much too pretty for that," he let out a harsh laugh, and he guided her hand over to another soldier by her side. "Wouldn't want to scar you up before you're shipped out to Paradis."

The hours ticked by in agonising seconds. That was what the last three days had all been like, and until they got bored of her body or decided chopping her parents’ fingers off would produce better answers, Faye was stuck being a fun pastime for the authorities.

It felt like just a second had passed. One moment, she was closing her eyes to blink and the next, she was standing breathlessly next to her father, just above the beaches of Paradis. She wasn't sure how she had gotten there, and she had a brief, fleeting thought: Had she been so severely traumatised that she'd blocked it all out?

In the far-off distance, Faye could see a tiny human screaming, their legs carrying them across the sand as quickly as they could manage while titans followed suit. There were at least a dozen of them, all ginormous, even from Faye’s perch on the wall.

They were all naked, moving towards the human as if in a stupor, seemingly hyper-focused on their early evening snack.

“Oh, this one’s a woman,” drawled a lazy voice. He was a short man cloaked in medals, and his eyes roved up and down Dina’s figure, “Too bad... If only you weren’t a devil.” She was shoved to her knees just beside Faye.

“Dina,” Grisha breathed, eyes wide in disbelief while he tried to form a coherent thought. His wife gave a small, apologetic smile, and he missed the way her eyes lowered to avoid his daughter. “Why are you here? I...” He grasped at his denial. Surely, the military wasn’t this cruel. “I told them every last thing there was to know,” his voice rose in sync with his panic, “I thought they let you go. I saw you leave…”

Faye swallowed her pride, hanging her head low while her father prattled on. There was no point in arguing over any of it. He had the last week to come to terms with his death; he shouldn’t have been so loud about it.

“This woman is of royal blood—”

“Shut up!” the soldier behind Grisha leapt forward, smashing her father's head into the concrete while keeping his hand over Grisha’s mouth. The ordeal captured Faye’s attention, and she watched in morbid interest. “Shut your mouth.”

Her brows knitted together. Why was this soldier so adamant about keeping Dina’s royal blood status a secret?

“Grisha, I promise,” Faye watched as the violet liquid was injected into Dina’s nape. Her mother’s eyes started watering, and she refused to look at her own daughter, even though she was about to be turned into a titan, “No matter what form I take, I swear I’ll come find you.”

“Well, isn’t that romantic,” the short and fat soldier chuckled, leaning his boot on Dina’s back. “I’m sure you’ll make a lovely titan couple.” He showed no hesitation before he booted Faye’s mother off the ledge. If anything, the man looked absolutely delighted with himself.

Vaguely, Faye could hear Grisha screaming for Dina, but it was all in vain. Lightning erupted from Dina’s form, and out snapped the jaws of a grinning titan, its eyes filled with euphoria akin to nothing Faye had ever witnessed in her short life. Its ribs protruded grotesquely, and before Faye could even cry out for her mother, it had caught eye contact with her.

For what felt like an eternity, it stayed glued to its spot on the sand, staring up at Faye with glassy blue eyes. She couldn’t tell what the titan felt, but her own heart clenched painfully in her chest, and she could feel tears streaking down her cheeks. Reality was finally setting in. Her mother was a titan. The woman who birthed her and tried to love her the best she could wasn’t even conscious of herself anymore.

The seven-year-old snapped out of her stupor, and when Faye’s eyes left her mother's, the titan’s lips jeered back to reveal yellowing teeth, and it began dawdling off after the rest of the titans.

“Look at that,” the fat one snickered, medals glinting in the low sunlight, “I guess she fancies Grice more now, eh?”

Why were they dragging this out?

“It’s you,” Grisha growled, seemingly growing a pair within the instant, “Fifteen years ago, you fed my eight-year-old sister to the dogs. It was you.”

Faye’s spine tingled. This was the man who murdered her namesake, the woman she was named after. Had she been incarcerated under his watch this whole time?

“Kruger,” the killer addressed, lighting a cigar and kicking another hostage to their knees, “If you’re done interrogating this one, I’d like to see him dance.” He blew out a rancid puff of smoke, an ironic tilt on his lips. “I remember you too now, son,” Faye’s lips twitched down at the belittling name. “So I’m going to let you go out in a special way.” He flicked his match down into the sand with ease, “We’ll turn this guy into a three or four-metre titan, then the two of you can fight.”

“Why would you do something so sad*stic?” Faye snapped, finally dragging her eyes up to meet his volatile ones. Everyone was staring at her, including her father. “Do you get off on seeing other people suffer?” Her stomach was lurching again, and this time, she couldn’t stop the vomit that spewed from her lips and off onto the sand while— what was his name again? Kruger? held onto her tied wrists to keep her from falling. He wasn’t gentle about it, but she still appreciated that he’d actually saved her from taking a nose dive into titan-territory.

“I wouldn’t call it pleasure. I just find it interesting,” he shrugged. It was so nonchalant, Faye thought he was taking the piss out of her or something, “Does that sound a bit crazy to you?” He started prepping another needle for the hostage in front of him, unbothered by Grisha and Faye’s horrified and pitiful expressions. “Well, the fact is most people want to see cruelty. Don’t get me wrong, I think peace is a wonderful thing, but something about it just feels lacking.” He pushed the air out of the syringe, holding it up to his face to inspect, eyes reflecting off the glass.

“Clearly, you’ve been a part of the chaos for too long then,” Faye managed.

“We’ve pushed death out of sight and mind—”

“Speak for yourself,” Faye spat hot-headedly. “Enroll in the military and repeat that sentence to me after.”

The bastard chuckled at the child’s unbridled fury, “Death is always near in nature, and some may think me abnormal for investigating such things, but to them, I’d say I’ve faced this cruel world head-on, much like you have, little girl.” There was nothing taunting in his voice, but Faye couldn’t help the stab of annoyance at his pet name for her. “And because we’ve bothered to deepen our understanding of death, we can both accept it when our time comes,” She held back a scowl while he pushed the needle into the skin with a straight face, still smoking his cigar, “You haven’t even screamed once since you’ve been up here, so my point is further emphasized by your actions.” His eyes turned back to Grisha, “It’s all about education. My boys learned from watching their dogs eat your sister.” He booted the man off the ledge, his face shadowed by the lightning of the new titan.

“Do you not feel any remorse?” Grisha’s head co*cked, trying not to get swept under the wave of madness the soldier was exuding.

“Well, I guess I get what you mean,” he took another long drag, polluting his lungs with the cancerous cigar in pleasure. “If something that horrible were to happen to one of my children, my heart would break, no question about it.” His eyes stayed trained on the titan below, who was still steaming, gathering its bearings. “You poor devils. It’s a shame you had to be born Eldian.”

“That’s a little callous, no?” Faye inquired, brows raised in silent questioning.

“Look,” his hand jutted out, and his finger pointed down to the titan hunched over the sand, “That is your people’s true form. All it takes is some titan spinal fluid, and any one of you will turn into a man-eating monster.” Kruger’s boot nudged Faye’s hands, which had been balled into fists. The action was so jutting that she jumped slightly, knitting her eyebrows together in confusion. “The whole of humanity would feel safer if you Eldians would just disappear, we wish we could just eradicate,” he viciously snarled out the word, “you from this world.”

“You what?” Grisha stammered out in disbelief.

“I have no trouble sleeping at night because I’m not really killing humans,” he spelled out, flicking his cigar off the ledge before he stepped past Faye and over to Grisha, towering over him menacingly, “If you had restored Eldia, you’d be butchering us Marleyans right now. Where’s your remorse, you murderous devil?”

“You’re lying,” Grisha intoned, and Faye found herself holding her breath. Why was her father picking a fight now of all times? “You’ve always lied, but I know the truth.” No. Of all Marleyans, this one was gave the least amount of sh*ts about our history. “Our founder, Ymir, helped this continent to prosper, she—”

“Yeah,” he scratched his head in impatience. “I’ve heard it before.” He grabbed onto Grisha’s shoulder and hand-less wrists, pulling him over to the ledge as if to taunt him, “Say, since your history is so wonderful, why don’t you share it with your friend down there?”

“No!” Grisha yelled, struggling, “You can’t do this to me!”

“Oooh, hear that?” he taunted, glee eating away at his stoicism at having made Grisha’s eyes pool with tears, “Your sister is calling for you.”

It was a guttural scream that ripped out of Grisha’s throat, one that she’d heard countless times during her month shooting down men on the field. In a split second, she was back in the mud, diving for cover while her comrades cried out for help.

But it left just as fast as it came, and in an instant, she watched the soldier be thrown off the ledge by none other than Kruger. The betrayal on his face haunted Faye. They must have worked together for years, but Kruger had seemingly thrown it all away for a man and child he barely knew.

Faye couldn’t tear her eyes from the scene. The titan had opened its maw, bringing the soldier closer and closer before chomping down, skinning his face clean off and leaving blood to splatter onto the sand.

“So was it as interesting as he said it was?” Kruger sighed, taking his hat off to brush his fingers through his hair. A weary look in his eyes.

“Wait,” Grisha craned his neck to look at the man whose back blocked out the sun. There were no signs of remorse or guilt, just a bottomless chasm of exhaustion. “Why’d you do that?”

“Because I’m The Owl, Grisha,” he tossed his hat to the side haphazardly, “Watch closely, and don’t forget.” He flicked out a swiss-army knife, dragging it across his palm in a clean slice, “This is how we of The Nine use our power.” He jumped off the ledge to land in the water, but the lightning and gust of wind had Faye clambering onto her father to keep from being blown away from the sheer force of it all.

His titan form stood tall in the water, and he effortlessly slaughtered his former comrades, drowning them all in the sea and decimating their only chance at escaping. She watched him pick up a lone soldier in his massive hands, holding them up to his face before he squeezed the life out of them, casting the scraps backward like compost.

Faye screwed her eyes shut, desperately clutching onto the idea that Kruger was her saviour and not a murderer, but when the thought crept into her head, her eyes slammed open. Of all people, Faye had no right to judge, not when it came to killing other people.

So when he returned to the ledge, she let him cut the rope on her wrists, and she gave him a thankful nod, hoping he understood the gesture. She let the adults talk, her head was starting to hurt, and Grisha’s yelling was only worsening the dull throbbing, so when Kruger kneeled down, his breathing laboured, Faye began to wander away from the pair, meaning to give them some privacy.

“Hold on,” Kruger’s voice had gone uncharacteristically soft, and he held a hand out to Faye. “You remind me of someone I used to know. Do you mind if we all sit and I just—” What the f*ck was he saying? “I know you’ve been through a lot, but can I just sit with you?”

Faye stood there for a second, carefully searching through Kruger’s eyes for any signs of mal-intent, and after a long, hard moment, she sighed, and she nodded. She settled herself next to him on the ledge, but she wasn’t touching him. No, that would be just a little too much too soon, and she wasn’t sure she could handle that sort of physical contact yet.

“You look really pale,” Faye murmured from her spot, inspecting the man's face. “And I still haven’t gotten a name.”

“Eren Kruger,” he managed, letting himself relax before he looked back at Grisha, green eyes on green eyes, “It wasn’t just fellow patriots. I’ve severed thousands of fingers from Subjects of Ymir—” Faye expertly flexed her own fingers. She’d evaded most of the brute physical torture in turn for being used sexually by the men interrogating her, and she wasn’t sure if she would have preferred one more than the other. “—and made them into titans. Women and children too, all while believing it was for the sake of Eldia.” Tears were welling in Eren’s eyes, and Faye’s empathy got the better of her, so she laid a hand on his knee. “I don’t have much time. Grisha, Faye, I’m entrusting you with the final task, just the two of you.”

Something in her found comfort and familiarity in the titan shifter, and when she noticed his nosebleed, she passed over a spare hanky, and she shifted just a little closer. During the interrogation, he’d been the only soldier to not participate, and that had to count for something.

“The day I first met you,” he was talking to Grisha, so Faye busied herself with pulling at the threads of her shirt. It was tattered and raggedy, and it had dried blood and mud covering the sleeves. It was disgusting. “If none of that had happened, you wouldn’t have festered enough hatred of Marley to come this far.”

A few words ran through Faye’s head: Premeditated, planned, strategist.

“Is that—” Grisha hesitated, almost curling back into himself in fear of the answer, “The reason you chose me?”

“That’s part of it,” Eren sighed, and his blunt honesty had Faye shifting closer to him. She was so close she could feel the warmth radiating off his body. “The country, your father, yourself,” he listed, moving his arm to let the child lean into him, “The hate in your eyes was enough to burn the world to ashes.”

“But don’t you think that kind of attitude breeds more violence?” Faye yawned.

Eren hummed, his chest vibrating soothingly beneath Faye’s head, “It depends. I was once like that too. The royal family that stayed behind formed a revolution. My father was a part of it.” His eyes remained downcast, swimming in sorrow and anguish, and Faye saw herself reflected in his glassy pools. “However, they accomplished nothing and were all burned alive.” That mental image made the child cringe. It seemed like most decent adults she had met had undergone some severe mental trauma.

“I was so young,” Eren continued, “All I could do was peek through the closet door and watch.” His hand balled into a fist on his knee, but his eyes never changed, “Ever since then, I’ve sworn revenge on Marley and the revival of Eldia, but all I’ve managed to do is cut the fingers off my fellow patriots and watch others be raped before kicking them off this wall and turning them into titans.”

“Lighten up, Mr. Kruger,” Faye mumbled out. “We’re all kids peeking through a crack in the closet.”

“Tell me, Owl,” Grisha spoke up seriously, “What is this task you left for me?”

“I want you to infiltrate the walls and retake the Founding Titan.” That sounded vaguely familiar. Something to do with Karl Fritz, Faye thought. “After you inherit my titan, that is.”

Alarm bells were ringing in Faye’s ears, and whatever relaxed state she’d been in while leaning on Mr. Kruger had been thrown out the window while she shot a hand out to steady herself.

“You want me to what?” Grisha’s voice was wavering, and Faye caught the telltale signs of his reluctance in the way his head tilted and his hands— or lack thereof— receded to his side as though he’d been burned.

“That means I’ll be eaten by you as a titan,” Eren cut in again, allowing Faye some space while she processed the information. The mental image of Grisha as a titan just… didn’t sit well with her. “You’ll take the Founding Titan from its owner the same way.”

“Why aren’t you doing it?” Faye questioned, squinting at Eren and trying to discern if he was just sending them on a suicide mission.

“Those who inherit the power of the Nine Titans perish in 13 years—”

“And you’re already on your last year,” Faye finished for him, piecing it all together efficiently.

“It’s called the Curse of Ymir,” Kruger explained, “The founder, Ymir, lived that long after her powers awakened, and none who came after her can surpass her.” Yeah, Faye could see how that would make sense. “If one possessing the power of the Nine Titans dies without passing it on, the power is inherited by a baby yet to be born by a Subject of Ymir.”

“So what,” Faye slowly forced her shoulders to ease, and she leaned against Eren again, “Are we all connected or something?”

“One inheritor said they saw paths– the blood and bones that form a titan,” It sounded shoddy, and Faye couldn’t quite picture it clearly. All she could think about were the streets back home and how they all led into one another. “All the paths cross at a single coordinate: The Founding Titan.”

“Who exactly was Ymir?” Grisha asked, eyeing his daughter, who had begun to slump against Eren. She seemed tired, probably more emotionally than physically.

“Under Marley's authority, she’s a pawn of the devil, but during the Eldian Empire era, she was a miracle of God,” Eren tilted his head back, surveying the cloudless sky while a flock of birds flew by in a rush, “Some say she touched the source of all living matter. Who am I to say they’re wrong?” Then his eyes fluttered down to the child, whose eyes were starting to droop. “The only truth in this world is that there is no truth. Anyone can become a god or a devil.”

“You’re the one who said Dina had royal blood in her,” Grisha suspiciously pointed out, carefully scrutinising the man in front of him. “Was that another ’Truth’ of yours?”

“Unfortunately, Dina having royal blood was true.”

“Then why’d you let them turn her?” Grisha snapped.

“Precisely because she had royal blood,” Kruger let out a long sigh, glancing down again at the brunette nestled into his side, “You saw what they did to her. Dina would have been met with a much crueller fate. It had to be done before Zeke told Marley everything.”

“He was scared,” Faye tiredly cut in, “You can’t objectively blame this on him; he’s only a kid and— well,” As much as Faye didn’t want to point it out, it had to be done. “Let's be honest; he didn’t exactly have the best upbringing.” After a thoughtful silence, she quietly added, “He probably tried to tell you beforehand too, but you were just too upset to see it.”

The dinner when Zeke asked Grisha to stop going out and doing dangerous things flashed in Grisha’s head, and he had to dig his nails into his forearm to keep from being overwhelmed with grief and emotion.

“I’ve failed as a father,” He muttered out sullenly.

“You still have a child to raise,” Faye reminded him, “Let's say we do make it to the walls in one piece— assuming you saved me because you wanted me to go with him—” She spared a quizzical look up at Eren, waiting for him to dip his head in agreement before she continued, “I still have, like, eight years until I’d be ready to make my own decisions.” It was all a lie, but Grisha needed the confidence boost, and Faye was more than willing to help the man out.

“Only someone with the power of the titans is capable of reaching the walls,” Eren added.

“To be perfectly honest, I don’t think I’m fit for the job—”

“You will do it,” Kruger held steadfast to his determination, and in some dark corner of Faye’s head, she wondered if he could see into the future.

“Look at that,” Grisha tried again, pointing down to the bloody and mangled corpse— or what was left of it, at least— of the soldier who had killed aunt Faye. “He was eaten alive by a titan, and you asked if watching that was interesting?” He laughed incredulously, and Faye subconsciously tensed. “It wasn’t interesting at all.” He sounded like he was going to have a mental breakdown. “His screams of agony were unbearable to hear.” Just as Faye braced herself, Grisha blew out a big huff of air, staring down at his fingerless hands. “I didn’t know any better. If I had known this was the price of freedom, I wouldn’t have paid it,” Faye stilled when she caught her father’s gaze, green eyes reflected in green eyes.

He pitied her.

“Stand,” Eren ordered, pulling Faye up with him. She stumbled a bit, not expecting Kruger to move so suddenly. “Fight. For the sake of restoring freedom and dignity to Eldia.” She watched Grisha’s shoulders slump, and he shook his head. “Look,” Eren’s free hand dipped into his pants pocket while he gently held Faye’s shoulder to his leg, and he handed over a photo, “I brought this from your home,” He held it up for Grisha to look at, but Faye’s obstinate father kept his eyes shamefully pointed down.

“I can’t look.” He sounded so dejected and worthless.

“So you can’t look, can’t stand, can’t fight,” Eren enumerated ruthlessly, “What’s wrong with you? Did Marley cut your balls off?” Faye clung to Kruger’s leg, knitting her brows together at her father’s lack of enthusiasm.

“It’s pointless to try and make me recall my hatred,” self-loathing laced Grisha’s tone, “All I have left are my sins.” Tears brimmed his eyes.

“That’s more than enough,” Eren cut through Grisha’s doubts like a hot knife, “The main reason I picked you was because you left the walls that day.” The day he’d indirectly killed his own sister. “That day, if you hadn’t taken your little sister and gone past the walls, you would have taken over your father’s clinic. Your sister may have grown up, married, and even had children.”

Faye internally winced, ‘ No need to remind the poor guy about what he screwed up. ’

“But you did go outside the walls,” Eren pressed, “Ever since the first day I kicked a patriot off this wall, ever since that day you took your sister outside the walls…” Grisha had started to quietly sob at his words, and a pang of sympathy ran through Faye. “We must push forward until the price of our actions is paid, even in death and after,” something clicked for Grisha, and he finally let his eyes dart to the side to stare at the family portrait, the very same one he would keep for over a decade. “This is a story that you began, is it not?”

“Come on, dad,” Faye left Eren’s leg to teeter over to her dad, taking the photo from the soldier's hands to place it into her father's, “I didn’t enlist in the military and get raped for nothing.” Grisha flinched at the brutally harsh words his seven-year-old unleashed, “So get your ass up so we can move on with our lives already.”

He was reluctant, but he listened, and a knowing look passed between Grisha and Eren.

“There are names given to each of the Nine Titans that includes the titan you will inherit,” Eren informed. “No matter which era this titan has found itself in, it has pushed forward, seeking out freedom, and for the sake of freedom, it fights.” Grisha listened with rapt attention, devouring all of Kruger’s words. “Therefore, it’s named The Attack Titan.”

“The Attack Titan,” Grisha echoed, tasting the name on his tongue.

“If the Founding Titan falls into Marley's hands, the Eldians are done for,” Eren warned.

“The King in the walls wouldn’t let that happen,” Grisha tried, but Eren cut him off again, a grave tone in his voice.

“The King in the walls won’t fight.” Faye couldn’t tell what it was about Eren Kruger that had her coming back like he was a magnet and she was scrap metal, but she found herself at his side again, hugging his waist. “‘If once again Eldia is driven to sin, we will perish as it’s meant to be. I have made a vow renouncing war with the Founding Titan.’ He said that to the royal family on the continent and then closed the walls,” Eren recited.

“What about all the titans in the walls?” Faye piped in, her mind dipping into one of the lessons she’d attended a year ago, “Didn’t he say they’d ‘Flatten the Earth,’ or something?”

“Those words were meant to deter an attack,” Kruger gently said, eyes softening when he let his hand rest on her shoulder, “It allowed for a brief time of peace. The King of the walls stole his people’s memories and made them believe humanity perished beyond the walls.”

“Sounds like a massive dick—”

“Faye,” Grisha hissed, “Where did you learn that word?”

“Heard a few soldiers saying it,” she shrugged. “I’ve had a potty mouth for the last year and a half, though, to be honest.”

“Focus,” Eren brought the two back from their short spat. “A King who can’t protect his people is no king. You must find them and strip them of the Founding Titan; that is our mission.”

“Hey,” Faye spoke up, “You still haven’t told me about my mission.”

Eren let out a soft hum, kneeling down to level himself with the child, and he let both of his hands rest on her shoulders, “You need to focus on Zeke; I’m sure you’ll see him again someday, and when you do, you need to be prepared.”

“Mr. Kruger,” Faye sent up a quizzical look, mimicking his movements while she placed her own hands on his shoulders, and she leaned in just slightly. “Do you—” The idea was stupid, she knew it was, but she needed to satiate the little nagging voice inside her head. “Can you see the future?”

Eren blinked. “What— Not exactly.”

“But you have some sort of idea?” She gave an expectant tilt of her head, and he nodded slowly. “When I see Zeke again, is he going to be angry?”

“He’s going to feel betrayed,” Eren corrected, “It’ll all unravel at some point, but I’d like to warn you that it’s not going to be an easy reunion.”

“That’s okay,” Faye nodded, mostly to herself. “I have this feeling, I think—” She shifted from foot to foot before she locked gazes with Eren again. “I think I’m gonna kill him.”

Grisha sucked in a sharp inhale of air, not believing his ears, while Kruger furrowed his eyebrows before he got to his feet and took out a syringe and a vial of titan serum.

“This goes for the two of you, but after you enter the walls, build a family.” He was already starting to fill the needle, and he let Grisha send up a glare.

“What are you talking about?” he questioned, “I’m still married to Dina.” Yes. Dina Jaeger, who was now dawdling off somewhere on the island, looking for humans to devour whole. “Won’t I just forget the things you tell me just before I become a titan anyway?”

“That’s not always the case,” Eren sighed, “And it’s possible someone else may see it.” Grisha let out a confused sound, and Kruger continued. “Your wife, your child, your neighbours if need be.” He turned to Faye again, holding something out for her to take. “That reminds me, I picked this off your mother while she was detained, figured you might want to keep it.”

There, he dropped Dina’s wedding ring into Faye’s palm, and her breath caught in her throat. She’d never seen her mother without it, and now that Faye was holding it, the tears were starting to pool in her eyes.

“I know you may think your mother disapproved and was angry with you in her last moments,” Eren laid his hand on her shoulder, prompting the child to look up at him. “But I think she felt proud of you. You should hold your head high and remember where you came from.”

“Mr. Kruger, I—” Faye tried to thank him, but her words caught in her throat, and she settled for wrapping her arms around his torso.

“Love someone inside the walls,” she heard him say, “If you can’t do that, it’ll only repeat. The same history, the same mistakes, over and over again.” He pet her hair the way Zeke used to. “To save Mikasa, Armin, and everyone else, you must see it through—”

Faye’s back stiffened, and vaguely, she could make out three figures inside her head, though neither of them seemed remotely familiar except the middle one, who looked similar to Grisha. The image was fleeting, though, and it left just as soon as it came.

“Mikasa? Armin? Who are they?” Grisha questioned, canting his head.

“Who knows,” Eren glanced over to the sea, staring out at the sunset beyond the horizon with a sorrowful gaze. “I’m not sure. They aren’t from my memories.”

“The sea,” Faye murmured from Eren’s side. “They wanted to see the sea.” She wasn’t sure how she knew, but there was a resolute tightness in her chest that throbbed the longer she thought of the trio she’d seen for a split second, “Something about wanting freedom.”

Chapter 5: 1. Of Shaggy Dogs and Doctors.

Chapter Text

Year 850 - Paradis Island - Trost District

The sky was littered with thick clouds that darkened the sky despite it only being noon. A small tea shop stood huddled between similar-looking buildings, the only thing distinguishing it was a crude sign that read, “The Tea House” in white paint over a wooden panel. It was worn and had clearly seen better days, if the chipped paint and shoddy wood were anything to judge by. Despite the decrepit sign, the shop was packed with customers, all hunched over hot cups of fragrant tea.

Behind the cash register stood a lanky man. He was generally attractive, with bright blue eyes and a mop of ginger hair and soft freckles. “You sure you’ll be okay to make it in this weather?” He glanced up in concern when his boss placed her small duffel bag on the counter, buttoning up a jacket.

“Save the niceties for the man in the back,” she teased, angling her head back to discreetly point at the Garrison soldier who was particularly easy on the eyes, smirking when she caught her coworker blushing.

“I already did,” he whispered, quickly averting his eyes when the soldier peered up from his seat near the window, “It’s not easy being a hom*osexual these days, Faye.” He lowered his voice, though his tone remained casual.

“I never said it was,” Faye shrugged, “Never hurts to subtly flirt though.” She swung the bag over her shoulder, pulling her hood up, before thoughtfully adding, “You’re not half bad at it either.”

“Faye,” he hissed, crossing his arms.

“Alexander,” she mimicked, easing up when he let a small smile peek through, “I’ll see you in an hour. You good to hold down the fort until then?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Alexander huffed, waving her off, “I’m going to see if he’s looking to get laid, so if I end up in jail, be prepared to bail me out.” He grinned down at his boss.

“You have your own money,” Faye quipped, spinning on her heel, “Do it yourself.” Alexander watched Faye’s back as she gave a lazy wave over her shoulder, exiting her warm establishment.

She swore when a chilly wind nipped at her cheeks, and she internally groaned at the prospect of having to walk around in such dour weather. Of all days, the weather had to turn to sh*t when she had deliveries to run.

Faye broke into a jog, and it wasn’t long before she was ducking beneath an overhanging roof, knocking on a door.

“Doctor Jaeger,” an old, frail woman smiled kindly at her as she opened the door, “Please, come in.” She hobbled to the side, but Faye shook her head, trying her best to look undeterred by the rain.

“Sorry, Mrs. Mondo, I’m in a bit of a rush today.” That was a lie. She could take as long as she needed to — Alexander would manage the shop just fine without her — but her brain forced her to stay outside in the relentless winds, knowing that if she took refuge in the home, she wouldn’t leave for another twenty minutes, and frankly, she didn't want the spend that time stuck making small talk about the weather. Faye was quick to unzip her bag, pulling out a small jar filled with pills, “Here’s your prescription for your arthritis.” It was a quick transaction, exchanging the medicine for a mediocre sum of money.

“Thank you, dear,” Mrs. Mondo graciously grinned, “I’ll see you in a few weeks.” Faye nodded, bidding the old woman farewell before starting for her next patient.

She repeated the process several times, sighing when she finally made it to the popular brothel. The lights flickered inside, and she could hear the raucous music half a block away from the establishment. The guard tipped his head in acknowledgment when she strolled past him, though he gave no warm welcome.

The first thing to hit Faye was the smell. It was like some horrible mixture of cheap perfume, sweat, piss, and alcohol, not to mention the palpable desperation of sex. Next was the dim lighting and loud music, though that was to be expected at any establishment that served alcohol. The main floor was littered with patrons, boozing it up and flirting with the prostitutes, who seemed unbothered and interested in the money.

“Hey Bertha,” Faye greeted, taking a seat at the bar, “Busy night?”

“Do you have the goods?” she bluntly questioned, setting down a glass to fix Faye with a serious stare. It was all business and no play with the woman.

“Yes ma’am,” Faye teetered in her seat, pulling her medical bag up to the counter to grab a few jars, “Birth control and muscle relaxant as promised.” They were hefty jars, enough to last a month for all twenty women. “I also included some herbal tea—on the house,” she slid a tin canister over the bar counter, grinning when the grumpy woman’s lips twitched upwards into a small smirk.

“You’re going to bleed yourself dry,” Bertha commented, beginning to shelve the medication and salve under the register.

“It’s the least I can do,” Faye shrugged, “I know how tough it is to work in a brothel, so I don’t mind adding in goodies here and there to boost morale.”

“To boost morale,” Bertha repeated, crossing her arms and staring at the tin, “I know they’ll be thrilled, but honestly, Faye.” The woman seemed to have aged another twenty years in front of Faye, the creases in her forehead deepening and the bags under her eyes darkening, “You’re losing money—”

“Consider it a donation from a retired sex worker,” Faye dryly insisted, “But if you have a bottle of water, I won’t turn it down.”

“That’s nothing compared to the quality of your tea,” Bertha frowned, though she passed over a stale bottle, “I know we promised to keep things professional, but if you need something, anything, Faye—”

“Bertha,” Faye cut in, “My tea shop is financially booming and I’m healthy—”

“But what if the MPs find out about your side business,” she shifted her eyes to a far table, where three soldiers sat in uniform, sipping on ale while chatting.

“I’ve been at this my whole life.” It was true. Faye had been acting as a doctor since she could hold a scalpel properly. She was only twenty-five, but was probably the best doctor within all three walls. “None of them have caught on yet. I promise I’ll keep my head down and out of trouble.”

“There have been rumours,” Bertha hissed, leaning over the bar to grip Faye’s collar with urgency, “and I’m worried. They’re going to find you sooner or later, Faye, and when they do—”

“Is there a problem here, Bertha?” It was one of the MPs, who’d luckily only just gotten within earshot of their conversation. He leaned against the bar, looking down his nose at Faye, who was still hunched over the counter being held by Bertha.

“No.” It was amazing to see how quickly Bertha’s demeanour switched from being serious and imposing, to flirty and inviting. She had subtly pushed her elbow into her side to show off her breasts, and she leaned in towards the soldier like a cat stalking a mouse, “We were just having a little girl talk. She’s been stealing my customers.”

“Her?” The soldier's lips dipped down in distaste while he scrutinised the woman in front of him. She looked ordinary enough: brown hair, sharp eyes, dressed in an oversized jacket that modestly covered everything from prying eyes. She was sopping wet from the rain, and a small puddle had begun forming under the barstool she sat at. Sure, she was a little on the short side, and most men he knew enjoyed a petite woman, but still… “She doesn’t look like a prostitute—”

“She doesn’t want the money,” Bertha interjected, sending a glare over at Faye, “She’s a slu*t for lavish dates.” The words sounded venomous, and Faye found the soldier’s eyes boring into her own.

“Is that so?” he hummed, stepping forward too close for comfort, “What sort of lavish dates?” He’d bent down just slightly to angle his head closer to hers, and his tone had morphed into a sultry whisper.

“I like coffee and hot baths,” Faye gave him a shy smile, watching as the soldier frowned.

“Coffee and a hot bath?” He echoed dumbly, visibly paling. Coffee was hard to come by, and was considered a luxury, and a hot bath… He hadn’t had one in years. “Must be some rich men you’ve stolen away from Bertha.”

“Hence why I’m so irritated,” Bertha snapped, discreetly sliding an envelope into Faye’s bag which was still haphazardly sprawled on the counter. She turned to address Faye, jerking her thumb at the door, “Now get the f*ck out of here before you drown my customers and rob me of even more money.”

“Sheesh,” Faye grumbled, slinging her bag around her shoulder, “I came here to apologise and I ended up getting yelled at.” She flitted her eyes up at the MP for a second before hopping off the stool and putting some much-needed distance between them.

“Cranky service means cranky customers, Bertha,” Faye lightly reminded, ignoring the inquisitive stare of the soldier, “I’ll send him your way next time.” She wasted no time in spinning on her heel to exit, suddenly needy for a breath of fresh air.

When she stepped out into the rain, it hit Faye like a carriage how stuffy the bar was. She’d need to let Bertha know to crack open a window to release the stale piss stench.

The rain was chilly, but Faye kept her hood off, letting the water run down her forehead and cheeks to cool her off from the brothel’s stifling atmosphere. ‘ Coffee and a hot bath, huh?’ she thought, ‘Haven’t had a cup of coffee since dad was around… ’ She sighed, rubbing her temples. As awful of a father Grisha Jaeger was, he certainly tried his best towards the end.

She felt around her bag, fingers grasping at the envelope and tugging it out before opening it. She chewed her lip, furrowing her eyebrows in frustration.

Bertha had overpaid.

It didn’t happen often, usually just around the holidays, but it was nowhere near Christmas or Easter, and her birthday wasn’t due for another few months. Why were there almost forty coins more than usual tucked away in her envelope? She could pay her bills with the forty and still have some left over.

Had she tipped off the Military Police, and this was her way of apologising for it? She seemed awfully anxious about them earlier. Was Bertha telling the truth when she said she heard rumours that the MPs were closing in on her?

Faye let out a frustrated growl, hastening her pace to get home. If the Military Police found her, she would be tortured and publicly executed. Not to mention Eren would probably be questioned or accused of conspiring with her, and he’d be offed as well, and by association, Mikasa and Armin would be jailed too.

Great. Just f*cking great.

She walked in silence, her brain racing over the possibilities and places to hide all of her medical equipment. The herbs and plants would be an easy fix; she could just tell the police that it was all for her tea shop. The hard part was actually physically hiding the evidence that she was patching people up and prescribing medications and salves. It wasn’t like she could send it home with Alexander; his house would probably be searched as well.

Faye guided herself down an alleyway, forcing big, deep breaths of air into her lungs. She could deal with this. One way or another, she’d make it out just fine. She had to. She plunged the envelope back into her bag, tucking it away safely as a contingency.

Just as she shifted her eyes forward, her foot caught on something, and she went flying face-first into a puddle, tumbling down in a heap.

“Damn,” Faye groaned, clutching tightly to her forehead. She brought it up into the dim lighting to check for blood, but thankfully her hand came back slick only with rain. She flitted her eyes backward for a second, just to see what she'd tripped over, only to scramble to her feet and take a few hasty steps back, effectively putting some distance between her and the soldier.

He was sitting up against the wall, wearing a brown leather jacket, though the clouds and dark alleyway made it difficult to make out the crest on it. He looked lanky and scrappy, with the beginning of a moustache and a goatee starting on his chin. She couldn’t tell if his eyes were open or shut, and she kicked her leg out, nudging his foot.

“Hey, are you dead?” It was blunt, and after a second, the man snapped an irritated look up at her, and that was when she noticed the blood seeping through his shirt. It was gruesome, and the rain only seemed to make it all look worse and more smeared. “Holy sh*t, buddy, are you alright?”

She hesitated for a second, Bertha’s words echoing in her head about the Military Police, but after a second, Faye mentally shrugged.

f*ck the police.

“I’m going to help you up, and take you home to patch you up. Do you think you can walk if I support you?” she questioned. After a moment of silence, Faye shifted her bag around her torso to sit just behind her hip before kneeling down on the balls of her feet to sling his arm around her neck. “Ready, let’s get you up on three,” she felt him tense his arm, and she watched him nod broodily.

“Brace yourself,” she warned, before quickly counting upwards, struggling to hoist the tall man to his feet. He was at least a foot taller than her, and she had to stand on her tippy toes to properly support him, and even that didn’t seem to help much. He hunched forward, trying to make it a bit easier on the girl, but the height difference wasn't exactly making it a cakewalk.

“I swear, my place is just a few minutes away,” she reassured, taking small steps forward while the soldier wobbled and struggled to keep up. “What happened to you? Why didn’t you go to the hospital?” Faye questioned, shifting to try and help him more.

“I did,” he quietly muttered. He felt the woman beneath him stiffen when he sniffed a few times, furrowing his brows. She smelt nice.

“Didn’t your mom ever tell you not to smell strangers?” Faye sarcastically quipped, a little creeped out by the injured soldier who was still sniffing her.

“You smell like disinfectant, mint, and...” he took another sniff, tilting his head just slightly, “black tea.” He’d know the smell of black tea anywhere. After all, his fellow captain was an avid drinker of tea, and black tea just so happened to be his favourite. But this woman was different. It was definitely black tea, but it smelled more fragrant and… expensive.

“Do you make it a habit to comment on other people’s body odours?” Faye questioned, sending a sharp look up, “Or is it just for the pretty women you trip in alleyways?” He curved his lips up just slightly. She had a decent personality.

“Usually I try and buy them a drink first,” he grunted, stumbling slightly, “I also tend to be less bloody.”

“You said you went to the hospital, right?” Faye inquired, stabilising the man to the best of her ability. He nodded, a bit more focused on putting one foot in front of the other. “Then why the hell were you bleeding out in an alleyway?” she hissed, thankful to have made it halfway through the narrow passage.

“More pressing patients,” he replied.

“So what?” Faye grumbled, “Everyone deserves to be treated properly. Instead, they let you out and you probably would have bled out if I hadn’t found you.”

“Who says I won’t? It’s only two hours past noon, there’s still time,” he pointed out.

“Listen here,” Faye snapped, “Stop being so pessimistic and start focusing on walking. At the pace we’re going, we’ll get there by sundown tomorrow.”

He let out a dry laugh, “Who made you my superior?” His thoughts wandered to Erwin for a second, and he wondered if his commander had even noticed he was missing, “I don’t even know your name.”

“It’s Faye, and unless you want to die of blood loss, you’ll follow my orders,” she aggressively suggested.

“Mike.” He groaned, forcing his legs to keep moving despite the urge to keel over, “My name is Mike Zacharias.”

“Well Mr. Zacharias, count your lucky stars,” Faye wryly said, stepping out of the decrepit alleyway, “We’re almost at my house, and I can get you some meds for the pain.” The teashop was in sight; they just had to make it down half a block.

“What, are you a drug dealer?” Mike questioned warily.

“Sort of,” Faye mumbled. Maybe this was a bad idea after all. “I’m an illegitimate doctor.”

Mike’s head swivelled to stare at the short woman, who was smiling sheepishly. “You could get into serious trouble for this,” he reminded gravely, frowning, “What kind of dumbass picks up a soldier when they’re doing something illegal?”

“You can hand me over to the MPs after I treat you,” Faye promised. “For now, just take a few deep breaths and brace yourself for some stair climbing,” She warned. Two more buildings to pass and then Alexander could help him upstairs.

Faye’s shoulders were all but screaming at her to drop the heavy soldier, but she ignored it, hellbent on finishing what she’d started.

“Stairs?” Mike snorted, “You can barely support me on even ground, how do you expect to—”

“Faye? Oh my god,” He was cut off by a ginger-haired boy, who’d rushed out of a quaint-looking teashop. “Why would you bring a soldier here? Are you insane?” he hissed, rushing to sling an arm around Mike and help carry his weight.

“Alexander,” Faye greeted with a pleasant— albeit strained— grin, “Meet my newest patient: Mike Zacharias.” Something about the boy seemed distantly familiar, and he leaned into Alexander, taking a big whiff of his scent.

Like Faye, he smelled like tea, though it was a lot more distorted and strong on him, like he’d doused himself with twenty different varieties of tea. He took another sniff, searching for the familiar tinge, and he creased his eyebrows. It was… Earthy, but not dirty.

“Faye,” Alexander whispered, eyes teetering to the side to discreetly look at his boss while he opened the door, “Why is this nutcase smelling me like I’m a piece of meat?” He grunted, holding the door open as Faye and Mike hobbled through.

“I can hear you,” Mike growled, ignoring the curious onlookers. The shop explained why the two of them reeked of tea, but still, he couldn’t shake the familiar scent on the boy.

“I dunno, did the same thing to me when I picked him off the street,” Faye muttered back, letting out a relieved sigh when Alexander hooked his hand around Mike again, taking the pressure off.

“I have a sensitive nose, that’s all,” Mike defended, not knowing what to say.

“Maybe he’s part dog,” Alexander theorised.

“Definitely scruffy enough for that,” Faye agreed.

“The sexy kind of scruffy though,” Alexander amended, a little too enthusiastically for Mike’s comfort, “I’ll bet you know exactly when your partner in bed is having a fun time—”

Mike coughed uncomfortably. “I’m about to bleed out and all you want to talk about is what I’m like in bed?” he questioned incredulously. They heaved him up a step on the staircase.

“Alright, Al, he’s clearly not comfortable talking about his sex life, so drop the topic,” Faye ordered, helping him up another two steps.

“You’re skinny, but goddamn, are you ever heavy,” Al whined, “Seriously, what are they feeding you?”

“Gruel,” Mike replied deadpan. He couldn’t even smell the oatmeal, let alone actually taste it.

“That’s going to have to change, Mike,” Faye ordered, they were almost up all the steps, and she ducked under his arm to get the door, “No patient of mine is going to go malnourished.”

Alexander pushed the soldier up the last step, helping him through the door before settling him down on the small bed.

“I’m heading back down,” the ginger informed them “If you need anything, just holler.” Alexander was gone before Mike could even blink. His head felt disoriented, like he’d had a few too many drinks.

“It reeks of disinfectant in here,” Mike complained, finding that despite lying down, the room tilted paradoxically to the side.

“Let's take a look at where all that blood is coming from,” Faye wasted to time in helping Mike out of his leather jacket and shirt, neatly hanging them up on a coat hanger in the corner before she turned her eyes on his chest and whistled, “Wow, you f*cked up with this one.” He heard her rummaging through her desk. “Let’s get some saline on there and take a look, shall we?”

It was a rhetorical question, of course, and Faye didn’t bother waiting for an answer before she started dabbing away at the blood and squirting the saline solution over the deep gash running across his shoulder and chest.

“What kind of knife tears through skin like this?” Faye inquired, leaning in to get a better look at the jagged edges of his skin.

“Wasn’t a knife, it was a titan,” Mike admitted. He failed to notice Faye tilt her head curiously, eyes sharp.

“You’re from the Survey Corps then.” It wasn’t a question, it was a statement, and Mike bobbed his head to confirm it. He smelt the rubbing alcohol the moment she uncorked the bottle, and he couldn’t help the guttural whine that sounded in the back of his throat.

“Don’t put that sh*t on me.” The alcohol was already burning his nose hairs, and he felt ready to dive out the way. He groaned when Faye set a hand on his chest just above the gash, keeping him in place while she ruthlessly poured the alcohol on him.

Mike let out a string of swear words; the alcohol felt like it was smouldering his insides.

He wasn’t sure what happened next; everything passed by in a rushed blur of Faye trying to sooth him, offering proper alcohol (which he downed with absolutely no regrets). It all swept by him too quickly to process, and before Mike knew it, his wound had been sutured shut, and his chest was wiped down of all the smeared blood.

“Well,” Faye started, tilting her head to look at her handiwork, “I think I’ve successfully kept you from dying today, so I’ll call that a win.” She wiped the sweat from her brow, getting to her feet, and handing him his shirt and jacket.

“You said you were an illicit doctor,” Mike furrowed his eyebrows, carefully shrugging on the shirt, “But you operate better than any professional I’ve ever met.” There was a silent accusation, one that Faye heard loud and clear.

“You can search through the files on every established doctor within the walls, but you won’t find my name on any of the documents,” Faye assured, “I learned from my father, and I never bothered with the university. It’s illegal, plain and simple. I have no credentials to my name.”

“I should report you,” Mike said slowly, just to see what she would do.

“Go ahead,” Faye shrugged, “Just keep Alexander out of it.” It was a simple enough request, and if Mike followed through on handing the information off to the MPs, the least he could do was omit her coworker.

“I’ll think about it,” Mike sighed, starting to tug on his jacket.

“Well,” Faye hummed. “If I’m still walking the streets the next time you injure yourself, feel free to drop by.” She was careful to keep her tone lighthearted despite the creeping anxiety she felt. It was a serious threat, and if Mike turned her in, Faye could kiss her life goodbye. She was quick to dig out a jar of blue salve and disinfectant, “Here, apply these two or three times a day to protect the wound from dirt.”

Mike stared at the jars apprehensively, though he still accepted it, dipping his chin in thanks, “I’ll see you around, one way or another.” Mike turned and left, without so much as a backwards glance.

Faye, on the other hand, peeled off her soggy clothes, discarding them in her laundry bin before sliding into a sweater and some sweats, grateful for how warm they felt on her cool skin. If it were raining this time next week, she’d have to push back her deliveries. As much as she enjoyed the rain, she hated the idea of leaving a trail of puddles wherever she went. She scowled at her wet floor.

*

It had been a little over a week since Faye had found Mike bleeding out in the alleyway near her shop, and with every day that passed, her anxiety seemed to worsen. The shop was closed on Sundays, and despite having the day off, Alexander found himself sitting in the downstairs kitchen, rubbing his forehead in aggravation.

“It’s a month and a half away,” Alexander clipped, “Can’t we just plan this out a week before?”

“Over my dead body,” Faye mockingly placed a hand over her chest, “Besides, it’s not every day my brother graduates from the training corps, you know?”

“Okay, but Eren is going to be the least appreciative out of the three,” He grumbled, tipping his cup back to finish off his tea. “And you can bet they’re all going to be annoying little runts.”

“Says you,” Faye teased. “Lets not forget I was fifteen when I moved to Trost and opened my tea shop. And how old were you then? Hmm?” It was a rhetorical question, but she still let the silence hang in the air for a second, “You were ten when you started working here. And I was the coolest teenager you knew, so naturally, it runs in the family.”

“Does not. Eren is a hotheaded maniac, and he’ll probably get himself killed.”

“Well, if he does, then we can plan his funeral out together,” she smiled when Alexander shoved his hands over his face, groaning loudly.

“Are you going to want banners and balloons for that too?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Faye chastised. “We’ll have a live band and order in pastries from Mitras.” She gave Alexander the most dazzling smile she could muster, while internally she was bashing her head in with a brick. What was going to happen if she couldn’t even make it the month and a half before the MPs busted her operation? “What should I get as a gift?”

“Well, do you have anything that belonged to your dad that you could pass along to Eren?” Alexander hummed.

“Yeah, I have his wedding band,” Faye murmured. “And a few shirts... ” She winced at the thought of giving away her fathers' last possessions. “I guess I can package that all up for him.” Her friend nodded slowly. “I was just going to get Armin a sudoku book because he likes running the numbers through his head; something about it calms him down — Though I can’t really sympathise.” She grumbled out the last part quietly. “And Mikasa, well…” Faye shifted in her seat, tilting her head in thought.

“Why don’t you get her a journal,” Alexander suggested, “She’s too quiet and stoic to voice her emotions, but maybe she’ll have an easier time writing them all down.”

Faye’s head snapped upwards, brows raised in surprise, “Al, that’s actually really thoughtful.”

“Well, I do have my moments…”

The two stared at each other when they heard the front door whip open, slamming against the wall.

“Go wait by the back door,” Faye ordered, a steely look in her eyes, “If it’s the police, make a run for it.” She was already on her feet, stalking forwards quietly, not waiting for Alexander to reply. She slowly peered out the small window overlooking the dining area of her tea shop, scanning the tables for signs of movement, and she huffed out a sigh. Must be near the staircase then.

She deftly opened the door, peering around the corner, heart catching in her throat when her eyes locked with the tall soldier.

He looked like sh*t. He had dark circles beneath his eyes, and he had a crutch situated under his left arm, though he was hunched over it at an uncomfortable angle.

“Mike? I thought you were going to turn me in to the authorities?” She forced her shoulders to sag, and she made her way over to the lanky man. Despite being obviously injured, he looked healthier, less pale.

“I thought about it,” he admitted, glancing backwards at the door when Alexander peeked his head out to watch the interaction, “But it doesn’t seem like you’re doing much harm, so I decided against it.” Mike shifted from foot to foot, glancing around the room while Faye stared up at him quizzically.

“I hurt my back during a spar,” he said it so quietly, and Faye almost didn’t hear him. “Do you think you could take a look at it?” It was in the way he averted his gaze to inspect the floor, and clenched his fists together that Faye realised he was probably wounding his pride.

“Yeah, head upstairs and take your shirt off. I’ll be up in a second.” She watched him nod, wearily making his way up the steps, struggling to manoeuvre up the stairs with his crutch. She turned to Alexander, who’d come to stand next to her. “Do you think he’s going to tell?”

“Hard to say,” Alexander admitted, voice low, “Doesn’t seem like the type to go back on his word though.”

Faye bobbed her head in agreement. “Head home for the day. Like you said, we have a month and a half to plan the graduation party, so there’s no rush. We can resume our planning- next week.”

“I’ll see you in the morning then,” he gave her a quick side hug, squeezing her gently before he padded off, leaving Faye to make her way up the stairs warily.

Mike sat on her bed, stiffly staring down at his hands when Faye opened the door.

“Alright, flop over and let me take a look,” Faye directed, grabbing a pair of gloves before settling into her chair and wheeling herself over to the bed. She pursed her lips at the nasty-looking bruise on his shoulder.

“It’s my lower back,” Mike mumbled, “I can’t really move around…” He felt Faye press down gently on his back, probing the muscles and tender skin.

“Can you straighten your back out when you’re walking?” She felt him wince under her hand, and she expertly massaged the skin.

“I’m crippled,” Mike confessed, “It hurts to move around, let alone straighten my back— f*ck.” He flinched when Faye started working her fingers into the muscle under his skin.

“You sprained a muscle in your back,” Faye announced, reaching behind her to grab some cream, slathering it onto his back. “I’m not a chiropractor, but I think if I stimulate this muscle, and push down like this—” Mike grunted when he felt her weight on his back, screwing his eyes shut, “And then we’ll loosen the muscle.” She worked in silence, kneading the tender area somewhat vigorously. She could feel the muscles relaxing.

“Try and sit up now.” Mike heard her loud and clear, and he grit his teeth, bracing himself for the inevitable pain he’d been subjected to for the last four days. He let the surprise filter into his face when he found he could straighten his back without pain

“This feels…”

“Better?” Faye shot him a cheeky smile, disposing of her gloves, “I know it’s not back to full capacity, but you should have a bit of relief now.” Her words rang true when his back only throbbed dully. She pulled out a container of goo, setting it on the bed next to Mike. “This is a muscle relaxant. Get someone to help you put it on, and see me in a few days so I can check on your back again.”

Her eyes trailed down to the stitches she’s given him, which looked like they were healing neatly and only just starting to dissolve. He’d clearly been using the medicated salve she gave him, and she nodded to herself. It hadn’t gotten infected.

“A couple of the other soldiers were wondering where I got the stitches from,” Mike spoke up, shrugging his shirt on, “What do you want me to tell them?”

She let out a surprised hum. She wasn’t expecting him to be so courteous.

“I’d rather keep the number of people privy to my illicit practises to a minimum,” Faye explained, “But if you trust them not to tell the authorities, I suppose you can bring them around.”

“What else can you do within the medical field?” Mike asked, curiosity burning a hole in his throat.

“I’m pretty good at amputating and stitching people up,” Faye didn’t fail to notice the amazed incline his head took, nor the way his jaw slackened just slightly, “I dunno. I’ve been doing this my whole life, so I’d say I’m just as knowledgeable as any other doctor within the walls.” ‘ If not more’ she added inside her head.

“Do you mind if I let Commander Erwin in on your abilities?” This woman could prove to be infinitely useful to his superior. He knew Erwin was more curious than the other soldiers when he’d gotten wind of the neat stitches, and Mike had been avoiding him out of fear Erwin would question him.

“I stand by my previous statement. If you think he’s trustworthy then go ahead, but next time, I’ll expect some kind of compensation.”

“Compensation?” Mike dumbly echoed.

“Money, less than what the hospital will charge, but I’ve got to cover the bills somehow, right?” she joked, watching Mike bob his head in understanding.

“I’m going to be off then. Thank you again for easing my back.” It was the first time Mike Zacharias had properly thanked her, and Faye couldn’t help the grin she shot him.

“I actually have a favour to ask you,” Faye interjected, “I’ll walk and talk with you, if you don’t mind.” Her palms had gone clammy, and she fell into step beside the soldier. “How close are the Scouting Regiment and the Military Police?” Faye asked, gripping tightly to the rail on the staircase.

“We hear from them occasionally,” Mike stiffly replied.

“Oh,” Faye let out a dejected sigh, “One of my patients informed me that the MPs might have gotten wind of me, and I’ve been wracking my brain for a way to elude them.”

Mike let out a small breath when they reached the bottom of the stairs. “I’ll speak to Commander Erwin and see if we can do anything for you,” he assured, leaning on his crutch with a much lighter back and less pained expression.

“You don’t have to—”

“Faye, you have no idea how grateful I am for my back,” Mike cut in, an earnest smile tilting his lips up, “It doesn’t hurt to at least inquire about it.”

*

Humanity’s two strongest soldiers sat on a small couch, while Erwin sat in a chair adjacent to them, mulling over Mike’s words.

“And she single-handedly stitched your wound?” Erwin reiterated while he sniffed the contents in one of the jars, watching as Mike nodded.

“Erwin, look at how clean the sutures are,” Levi’s finger traced just above the jagged skin. “And it looks like the ointment she prescribed kept it from getting infected too.” He leaned in to closely inspect the neat stitches, furrowing his brow. He’d never seen them done in such a tidy fashion. To add to that, Mike had been hunched over with a pained expression since their spar a few days ago, but he seemed to be in less pain since he arrived back at base, crediting the criminal for his recovery.

“And how long did you say it took her?” Erwin asked again, closing the lid on the jar.

“Fifteen minutes, give or take,” Mike shrugged, “She was pretty efficient.”

Erwin’s mind was teeming with possible ways he could use the illicit doctor’s medical skills. She could easily decrease their death rate, and in doing so, would simultaneously boost morale. The woman was capable of stitching up a sizable wound in a timely manner, and she did it neatly, not to mention providing Mike with salve and disinfectant to keep the wound clean.

Of course, all of the Scouts were obligated to undergo a mandatory first aid course, but if the mortality rate was anything to judge by, the first aid training was useless.

“Levi,” Erwin addressed. “Go with Mike to meet her in a month. Let him collect some intel first, and we’ll send her salve to Hange; maybe they can replicate it.”

Levi grimaced, crossing his arms. “I’m not injured,” he pointed out.

“Maybe she can prescribe something for your headaches,” Erwin suggested passively, while the Captain scoffed, lips curling down in distaste.

“It’s not a physical injury. It’s psychological,” Levi reminded him, “I doubt she’ll be able to reverse the damage done to my psyche.”

“Still,” Erwin persisted, “In a month I expect you to accompany Mike.” And after a thoughtful moment, he added, “Besides, Mike said she owned a tea shop. If she can’t prescribe you anything, you can at least enjoy the tea.”

Levi let out an irritated sigh, choosing to let his silence answer for him. Regardless of the woman’s so-called abilities, he was still apprehensive. A criminal was a criminal, and no one knew that better than himself.

Chapter 6: 2. Siblings and Necklaces

Chapter Text

Three weeks passed by in a relative blur. Faye had most of the kinks worked out for Eren’s graduation party, and she had sent him a letter to assure him it was fine to invite his friends as they deserved congratulations too. Mike had stopped by once a week to have his stitches inspected and his back massaged, though after the second week, he had assured Faye he was back to optimal health.

“You think he’ll be back today?” Alexander’s eyes glanced up at the brunette, who was working on the logbooks of the shop.

“Maybe,” she shrugged, “He’s been back every week so far, and I think they left on an expedition a few days ago. If they get back today, he’ll probably want me to check his wounds.”

“How long do you think it’ll take before Mike starts bringing his buddies around?” Alexander mused, a smug smirk plastered over his face, “If he brings them in, you could have some really hot sex—”

“You know how uncomfortable it makes him when you talk about his sex life,” Faye sighed, “So why do you insist on always bringing the topic up?”

“He smiled last time,” Alexander corrected, swivelling on his stool to point out, “I think he likes my sense of humour, more than yours, anyway.” Alexander hopped off his stool, grabbing a teapot and refilling some of their customers' cups, making small talk with them. She watched in amusem*nt when he reached the Garrison soldier from a few weeks back, a subtle blush tinting his cheeks while he filled the man's cup.

“Do you ever wonder what would have happened if I never hired you?” Faye questioned, tallying the money on her page.

“Let’s not forget how obsessed with you I was when you first moved in,” Alexander reminded her, a nostalgic smile gracing his lips, “I would have found a way to hang around you, one way or another.”

“Well, that was back when Petra first enlisted into the military,” Faye glanced up, “I think you were just lonely because you didn’t have your big sister to bother—”

“Yeah, so I latched onto you, and here we are,” Alexander childishly stuck his tongue out, “Ten years later, we’re running a tea shop and an illegal hospital together.” He let out a small snort at his words.

Silence befell them again while Faye ran the numbers into her books, and Alexander doted on the customers. Something felt bizarre that day, like the air was laced with dread and disquietude, and the two of them tensed every time the door swung open.

It was just as Faye watched their last customer leave some money on the table, that the door opened and the cool night air crept into the building, bringing with it two bloody figures. They stumbled in, leaning on each other for support. The customer was the last thing on Faye’s mind, and she snapped her eyes over to Alexander, who stood frozen behind the till, gripping tightly to a pot of tea.

“Al, get some damp towels,” she snapped, setting down a teacup she had been drying on the counter to stand next to the shorter fellow, looping her arms around his torso and lending support, “You guys don’t look like you’re in any condition to climb some stairs, so you’re going to have to use the tables.” She guided the two of them over to one of the tables she had scrubbed down earlier, letting them figure out how to splay themselves out.

Faye’s heart thudded loudly in her chest while she spun on her heel to grab some supplies. Alexander would be back any moment and he could help her. She reached the top of her stairs and was suddenly extremely glad to have her emergency bag on standby, sitting just to the left of the steps. She had never had to bring it out before, but now seemed as good a time as any to finally make use out of it.

“Alright,” she muttered, standing next to the shorter of the two while Alexander shifted from foot to foot, riddled with anxiety. “Al, start cleaning the blood away from the other one. You brought the towels, right?”

“Here,” Al set a large basin between the two bodies which had towels soaking in it.

Faye was quick to pull out a pair of scissors, efficiently cutting open the man's shirt before dipping her hand into the basin, mildly surprised to find the water warm. Alexander had clearly added in some boiling water.

She started on the man’s waist, which seemed to bear the worst of the lacerations on his body. “Looks like you narrowly avoided hitting any arteries or veins,” she murmured, gently dabbing away some blood to get a better look. She couldn’t even tell how much blood he lost.

“Alexander, how’s the other one looking?” Faye asked, calmly grabbing some disinfectant and her suture kit.

“Faye. It’s... He’s bad,” Alexander’s voice had started to waiver just slightly, “It’s Mike and…” Faye’s head snapped up to stare at the familiar soldier. She couldn’t even make out his face because it was covered in blood.

“Take a deep breath,” Faye instructed, listening to the boy take a shaky breath. “I’m going to disinfect this one. I think he passed out.” She wasn’t entirely sure, but he hadn’t said a word to her the entire time. “And then I’m going to suture him. Do you think you can clean the wounds on Mike for me? Keep putting pressure over the wounds that are still bleeding too.” He let out another unsteady exhale, nodding slowly while he continued to apply pressure over the man’s wounds. “After I switch patients, I need you to run home and grab some extra clothes for these two, and I’ll need your help to move them upstairs, got it?”

“Yeah, do you think they’ll make it?” he hesitantly asked, dipping the towel in the warm water and wringing it out.

“This one doesn’t look too bad. He’s got a lot of smaller cuts and he might have cracked a rib, but he’ll make it. It’ll take me ten minutes to suture him.” She poured the isopropyl alcohol over the wound, wincing as the still unconscious man groaned. “Do you think Mike can hold out until then?”

“Faye, there's just…” He snuck a glance over at Faye, who was concentrating on keeping the man still while she disinfected his gash. “...There’s just a lot of blood.”

“How bad are the wounds? Talk to me,” she kept her tone gentle while she threaded a hooked needle.

“They look painful,” Al admitted, while Faye started dipping her needle into her patient's skin. “And he’s really cold—”

“How is his breathing? Is it steady or really faint?” Faye interrogated, knotting the first suture.

“It seems kind of wheezy, like he’s struggling,” Alexander numbly listened to Mike shudder in a laboured breath.

“If he stops breathing let me know immediately, okay? Just keep talking to me, you don’t even have to talk about Mike; talk to me about your mom or your sister.” She slid the needle into the skin again.

Alexander, meanwhile, had gone pale. He was doing a good job of maintaining pressure over the worst of the wounds, and he focused on clearing away the blood as best as he could. He wasn’t really sure what words his lips formed, but he was vaguely aware that he was babbling.

Mike had gone just as pale as he had, and he was slightly cold to touch. He was in bad condition, that much was for certain. His laboured breathing put Alexander on high alert, and everytime Mike inhaled, he exhaled. Al’s stomach lurched, but he made no move to vomit. Mike could be on his deathbed, and here he was feeling nauseous just at the sight of his bloodied body.

The thought disgusted Alexander.

When had he become such a selfish bastard? Mike was fighting for his life right in front of his eyes, and Alexander was worried about vomiting? He unpeeled the towel, peeking at the gnarled wound, which had slowed its bleeding.

“Alright, Al,” Faye placed her hand over his shoulder. “Grab the clothes. I’ll take over from here.” She knitted her brows together at Alexander when his lip quivered. “You’ll be out for five minutes tops. I can handle Mike until you get back, but you need to hurry. The longer we spend dilly-dallying, the less time we have to patch him up before he runs out of blood. Come on,” Faye urged.

She watched Alexander stand up, wordlessly making his way out of the tea shop. He was in emotional shock. He’d get over it though.

“Alright, let’s take a— oh sh*t,” Faye swore loudly, and her lips curled back in alarm. “Mike,” She shook his shoulder, growling when he groaned but remained unconscious. She dug around in her bag, fingers wrapping around a few capped syringes.

She had paid a hefty price for the opioid earlier that same year, and now that she had it, she felt less guilty when she swiftly injected it into a vein. She turned on her heel, grabbing a scalpel and disinfecting it before she lit a candle, setting it down just off to the side.

She held her breath while she held the scalpel over the open flame. She didn’t have time to stitch Mike closed, and by the laboured breaths he was taking, she wasn’t sure he’d actually make it. She winced when the scalpel made contact with the skin, which sizzled before she all but glued it together using the melted skin and blood.

She had not cauterised a wound in years, and Faye was acutely aware of that fact, while the stench of burnt human skin filled the air. She held the scalpel over the flame again, repeating the process of cauterising Mike’s wound.

“I got the—” Alexander barged in through the front door, but the moment the smell of Mike’s burning flesh made contact with his nostrils, he leaned out the door, retching.

“Get a hold of yourself, Al,” Faye reprimanded, “I need you to wipe your mouth and finish dressing the wounds on the other one.” Faye felt awful for being so blunt and harsh. It was hard to remember that Alexander had never seen this much blood or such severe wounds.

“Got it,” Alexander heaved in a breath, wiping his mouth with the back of his sleeve before he got to work on the shorter soldier. Something about the man screamed at him, yelling and insisting the man looked familiar, but he couldn’t quite place where he seemed to know the soldier from.

He poured disinfectant over his chest, placing a square bandage atop the scrape to keep dirt and bacteria from entering. Though, if Alexander were being honest, he was grateful Faye was finally treating Mike.

The two had not interacted a whole lot, but Mike was always pleasant, giving polite nods in greeting, and discreetly leaving money on the front counter before he left, usually ordering some tea to go as well. It wasn’t much, but he had quickly grown attached to the scout.

Faye, meanwhile, wiped the sweat from her brow before she doused Mike’s chest in more disinfectant. He gave a whine in his sleep, but the opioid was definitely muffling the pain and successfully kept Mike unconscious. She was quick to wrap the bandages around his chest, poking the purple skin and checking his ribs, several of which were cracked.

“Help me load Mike onto the stretcher,” Faye ordered, carefully tucking half of it under Mike before Alexander helped roll him onto it, and they transported him onto the bed. This was no easy feat, as the lanky man weighed a fair bit, but when they finally rolled him onto the bed, Faye heaved out a sigh. The worst was over for Mike, and the only thing she could do now was wait and see how he fared through the night. The morphine would wear off in four hours, and with any luck, he would wake up.

The pair returned downstairs and wrapped the unknown soldier in secure bandages to keep his ribs from moving too much before they rolled him onto the gurney and hauled him up the stairs, settling him in next to Mike, and covering the two up with a blanket.

Faye only hoped Mike would make it to the morning.

*

Levi let out a low groan. His head was throbbing and his torso felt numb, not to mention he was lying down on a particularly soft bed with some sort of behemoth next to him. He cracked an eye open, and stared up at the wooden ceiling. ‘That’s right,' he thought, ‘Mike and I made it to that criminal doctor’s tea shop.’

He blinked away the bleariness from his eyes, grunting when he sat up. It had to be midday if Levi were to judge the sky outside the small window. His eyes shifted, inspecting the small room. It was nothing special– just a desk pushed up against a wall, a bunch of cupboards, the bed, and a small chair in which a young lady was slumped over.

“Oi,” Levi kicked his leg out, nudging Mike’s knee, “Wake up.” He winced when he leaned over, his ribs squeezing together painfully. “I said wake up, Mike,” he hissed, darting a hand out to shake the soldier.

“f*ck off,” Mike groaned, his hand clutching tightly to his chest, “That hurts.”

“It’s going to hurt more if you don’t wake the girl up,” Levi snapped, hurling his leg forward to kick Mike’s knee again.

“Alright, alright,” Mike muttered, lazily reaching a hand out to the woman and gently shaking her leg.

“Mike?” Faye questioned, rubbing her eyes. “How are you feeling? Don’t move around too much or you’ll risk tearing the skin I cauterised,” she warned.

“Cauterised?” Mike echoed. “You mean you—”

“You were losing a lot of blood a little too quickly,” Faye interjected tiredly, “You can thank me by resting up when you leave.”

“You aren’t keeping us here?” Levi cut in, crossing his arms with an irate scowl.

“It’s not like I can detain you two,” Faye gave a meek smile, “If you want to leave, be my guest.” That was all Levi needed to push the blanket off himself and slowly get to his feet. His ribs hurt like a motherf*cker, and he wanted to bathe. “Feel free to grab some tea on your way out.”

Mike swept the blanket off himself, moving slowly and cautiously while Faye held up a container of salve. “Twice a day, and make sure you use that disinfectant I gave you a few weeks ago to keep the wounds clean. Share with your irritable friend.”

“Much appreciated,” Mike dipped his head in thanks, moving to follow Levi out the door.

“Next time you come battered up like that, don’t pass out. You almost gave Alexander a heart attack,” Faye murmured, while Mike wordlessly nodded.

It was when he descended the staircase that a ginger haired blob clutched onto him, much like a child would when their parent returned from work. Mike could smell the tears Alexander was blinking away.

“Don’t do that to me,” he chastised, while Mike awkwardly patted his back. “Do you have any idea how worried Faye and I were?”

“Get off of him,” Levi growled from beside Mike. “Assaulting military personnel is a punishable offence.” Levi expected the pathetic boy to move himself off Mike and mumble out an apology, but he took a step back when he whirled around and jabbed a finger into his chest.

“And you!” Al snapped. “Some thanks would be nice— Captain Levi?” The boy frowned, his finger dropping back to his side. “What are you— Oh my god, is Petra alright?” Worry flooded the ginger’s eyes while he held his breath, waiting for Levi to respond.

“She’s fine. Relatively unscathed,” Levi scoffed, “Why? What’s it to you?”

“I’m her brother, you dick—”

Something in Mike's head clicked. The familiar earthy scent Alexander had. That's where he recognized it from. Petra.

“Alrighty,” Faye nervously laughed, slinging her arms around Alexander’s torso. Levi narrowed his eyes at the insolent boy. He could definitely see the family resemblance in the hair and freckles, but his attitude would have gotten him two months worth of cleaning the stables if he were part of the scouts. “Let’s not piss off the injured soldiers,” she hissed out the last part, flitting her eyes back up at Levi, “Forgive him. He’s been worried sick the whole night and his manners have dulled with the lack of sleep.”

Any moron could see she was covering for the boy, afraid of what the soldiers might do, and Levi let out an annoyed scoff.

“See to it he’s dealt with,” Levi muttered, spinning on his heel and making a beeline for the door, while Mike shot an apologetic smile over his shoulder before falling into step with the short captain.

Faye and Alexander stared at each other, shuffling in discomfort.

“He’s an asshole,” Alexander decided, “I liked him better when he was unconscious.”

Faye hummed, tilting her head tiredly, “Did you see how short he was?”

“Still taller than you,” Alexander quipped, grinning at the snide eye roll Faye shot him. “Maybe you guys’ll have a threesome— Ow!” Alexander stood, holding his forehead where Faye had just smacked him.

*

Erwin chuckled into his hand, trying to keep from offending Levi. The short captain was frowning, but if one looked close enough, you would notice his lips had curled up just slightly in quiet amusem*nt.

“The kid has balls,” he shrugged, “Though I don’t think he would last long in the military.”

“And you said she cauterised your wounds?” Erwin’s eyes flickered over to Mike, who sat shirtless on the small couch, letting Erwin and Levi inspect the skin Faye singed together. He was going to scar, that was for certain, but the fact that none of his wounds opened up on the journey from Trost seemed like a miracle. The last medic the Scout Regiment hired was barely able to suture skin together, so to hear that an illicit doctor was capable of cauterising a wound… It was curious, to say the least.

“Levi and I will return tomorrow,” Erwin decided, “I think it’s high time for me to meet her.” He watched Mike shift in his seat, averting his eyes.

“Erwin, she’s not some pawn in your chess game,” Mike quietly said, “She’s saved my life twice now, and I owe her as much.” Guilt was quickly crippling Mike the longer he thought about Erwin meeting Faye. There was no doubt in Mike’s mind he would manipulate the woman. “I don’t want to be the reason she gets killed.”

“As much as I appreciate you bringing your concerns to the table, Mike,” Erwin started, “I don’t think they’re needed. I’ll simply ask… Faye, was it? to join the Scouting Regiment, and if she declines I’ll leave her alone.” It was a lie. A big, fat lie. Faye had proven through treating Mike and Levi that she was an extremely valuable asset to the Survey Corps, and he would be damned if he let her slip between his fingers. “What can you tell me about her?”

“She keeps her shop and bedroom clean,” Levi volunteered, rolling his shoulders back. “When I woke up, I didn’t even see dust particles floating around near her window.” Mike nodded, confirming Levi’s statement. Last week he’d witnessed her furiously scrubbing away at the dining tables in the shop, and she always faintly smelled like disinfectant, so it wasn’t much of a surprise she met Levi’s cleanliness standards.

“The kid,” Levi continued, then hesitated, Petra’s face flashing in his mind, “He’s Petra’s brother.” He hadn’t bothered to ask his name; it made no difference to him. “Faye seemed close with him; maybe they’re lovers.”

“No,” Mike cut in. “Alexander is….” he hesitated, “ay. He’s more interested in me than Faye, and he likes to joke around about sex.” Already Mike began regretting opening his mouth. Erwin’s lips curled up into a deranged smile, clearly making a plan to use this information to his advantage, “Erwin, I insist I go with you tomorrow.”

“Fine by me,” the Commander shrugged, “She’ll be more at ease if you’re there too, instead of just two strangers.”

*

“So, theoretically,” Alexander grunted, lifting a particularly heavy box filled with jars of salve and ointments, “If Bertha is right and the MPs show up tonight, how do you know they won’t search your attic?”

“Because I’m not putting all this sh*t into my attic,” Faye replied, boxing her scalpels and medical supplies, “It’s going into the walls and flooring.” They were almost done packing everything up.

“That literally makes no sense,” Alexander deadpanned, setting the box next to the corner, “If some of this is going into the floor, then isn’t that considered the ceiling and therefore an attic?”

“No, but that's not the point,” she shoved the last of her herbs into the box, brushing away the fallout and chucking it out the window, “You work on fitting everything into the walls in here, and I’ll start on the floor.” She grunted, pushing her heavy desk over just slightly, taking careful consideration not to scratch her wooden floors up.

“What if Mike and Captain Levi swing by today?” Al questioned, peeling away the cardboard Faye had fitted into the wall.

“They were just here yesterday, why would they come back?” Faye pressed down on one of the floor panels, feeling the plank tilt upwards with ease before she repeated the process several times.

“Well, maybe Mike got into another scrap or something,” Alexander suggested, cramming another box into the hole.

Faye started lowering a box into the small hole, fitting it perfectly inside so none of the nearby panels on the floor would accidentally lift. “If he does, I’ll make him come back later.”

“But what if it’s an emergency?” he stressed, shifting a box into the wall again, “Or what if they get here when the MPs do, and Captain Levi lets slip—”

“Have some faith in Mike,” Faye cut in, “Besides, I already slipped some medical supplies into the first aid kit downstairs.” The news made Alexander’s heart settle just slightly, and he shoved another box into the wall. “And I already removed all the questionable herbs in the spare room, so we’re clear on that front.”

“What about your medical bags?”

“Already sealed up behind the cupboards in the pantry,” Faye assured. “Why don’t you go man the till downstairs so I can finish up here?” she suggested. There were only a few more boxes, and it wouldn’t take much to tuck them all away and reseal the holes. Besides, with Alexander’s constant worrying, he’d be more of a nuisance than help.

Alexander obliged, and she heard the door click shut before his footsteps padded down the stairs, and she continued hiding her illicit practises.

“Hey, mom—” Alexander called, rounding the corner, only to stop dead in his tracks. “Oh,” It came out choked, the words getting stuck in his throat while he tried to swallow a lump.

Petra Ral stood next to their mother, frowning and knitting her eyebrows together at Alexander.

“Hunny, look who dropped by for a visit,” Mrs. Ral excitedly teetered over to her daughter, carefully moving her forward to present to her son, “I wish your father would have taken the day off. We could have all had some tea.”

“I don’t think Petra is interested in having tea with me, mom,” Al narrowed his eyes. “In fact, I think this is the first time she’s ever stepped foot into Faye and I’s tea shop.” He’d started to sweat, his hands clammy.

“Mom, why don’t you go home. I’ll meet you in an hour; I’m still on duty,” Petra shot an innocent smile at her mother, ignoring Alexander’s previous statement. He was right; she’d purposefully avoided coming into the shop out of bitter resentment.

Alexander watched his mother give a rushed nod, scurrying out the door to start on a hearty dinner to celebrate Petra’s visit.

“So?” Alexander questioned, “Are you here to see me, or did you have some ulterior motive?” The words came out in a venomous hiss, and he bit his tongue to keep from swearing at his sister.

“Commander Erwin, Captain Mike and Captain Levi all came to visit some kind of prodigious doctor,” Petra vapidly explained, not noticing the way Alexander steadied himself on the countertop, suddenly feeling the floor sway under his feet. “Imagine my surprise when I walked in and I saw mom manning the till.”

In his surprise, Alexander had indeed failed to notice Mike and his comrades, who sat at a nearby table with a few soldiers, and he bit back a growl. Of all the days Mike had decided to show Faye off, he had to choose the one when they were scheduled to get searched by the MPs. He knew something like this would happen, and Faye had brushed his concerns off without a second thought.

“I’ll let Faye know they’re here to see her,” Alexander stiffly informed, ready to spin on his heel and put some distance between his sister and himself, only for a hand to latch onto his wrist, spinning him around with hostile intent.

“Faye?” Petra questioned, her lips curling down into a scowl, “I thought she was your boss—”

“We’re co-owners now,” Alexander coldly said. It was true, Alexander’s name had been put down as a co-owner three years prior, but that didn’t stop him from referring to Faye as his boss. He’d be damned if Petra ever found out that tidbit of information though. “And what she does in her spare time is of no concern to you.” He felt her fingers tighten on his wrist.

“This concerns my Captain,” Petra spat, “And I’ll be damned if she intends to turn him into a waiter for her lacklustre tea shop like she did you.”

“This lacklustre tea shop is what generates the money we send you every month,” Alexander reminded, flicking his wrist and forcing Petra’s fingers to lose their hold, “And you should be thankful Faye was kind enough to patch Captain Levi up in the first place.” He watched Petra open her mouth, but in his anger and petulance, he made sure to get the last word in, “If you’ll excuse me, I think Faye deserves to know she has company.”

The moment he rounded the corner, he found himself rushing up the staircase, desperate to breathe in some air that hadn’t been polluted by his sister’s noxious words.

The door slammed open, and Faye snapped her head up, not five minutes into her peace and quiet, to see Alexander’s frantic eyes settling on her.

“Hey, are you alright? Did the MPs—” Alexander rushed forward, leaning down to hug his friend, who had been pushing around some boxes.

“Petra called our tea shop lacklustre,” he let out a hollow laugh, slumping into Faye’s arms. He felt like he’d travelled back in time ten years, all of a sudden back in the mindset of a ten-year-old. “She’s here with her team.”

“Do you need a minute to decompress?” Faye offered, letting the twenty-year-old lean his head on her shoulder. “I can go downstairs and—”

“No,” Alexander slowly took a deep breath, steadying himself, “I need to talk to her anyways. I don’t understand why she doesn’t like you.”

“Come on,” Faye chastised, “It’s obviously because I dot the letter ‘i’ with a heart.” It was a sh*tty joke, even for Faye, but Alexander laughed regardless, glad to know Faye was relatively calm about the situation. If she could joke around and keep her anxiety under control, so could he.

“Mike and Captain Levi are back,” he murmured, letting go of Faye, “They brought the commander too.” Faye noticed how pale his face had gotten, and she frowned just slightly. His hair looked like he ran his hand through it a few hundred times, so she brought a hand up, patting it down.

“First things first,” she sighed, gingerly fixing his hair, “You need to take a few deep breaths and figure out a way to talk to your sister without panicking.” He let her fix his shirt, straightening it out. “Then you’re going to march downstairs, send Mike, Levi and the Commander up,” she scrunched her nose, wiping away some dirt from Alexander’s arm. “And then you’re going to sit down with your sister, and have a serious discussion with her about why she’s been so hostile and defensive with you for the last ten years, kapeesh?”

“Faye, I don’t—”

“Bertha said the MPs would show up around six, which gives us a half hour,” Faye cut in calmly. “I know you don’t want to confront her, but I’ve watched you struggle and blame yourself for your sh*tty relationship with Petra, and I’m getting tired of it,” Alexander shifted his eyes to the ground, nodding. “I’m going to be thirty in five years, and do you know what that makes me?” Faye questioned. “Old. I’m getting old.”

It was the methodical tone Faye’s voice took that had Alexander easing his shoulders and unhinging his jaw to relax.

“You’ll come down when you finish, right?” Al quietly asked, eyes wide in apprehension. He looked like a complete child, receding into himself like that and slumping his shoulders with a subtle pout.

“I promise I will,” Faye nodded, guiding him to the door, “Just keep your shoulders back, your head held high, and remember to breathe.” She watched Alexander give a nod, straightening his posture before he started down the stairs again. He was twenty, but he still acted like a ten-year-old.

Faye settled herself on the floor again, returning to sorting through the boxes and carefully tucking them away from prying eyes. It wasn’t long before she heard a knock on the door frame, and she called over her shoulder for everyone to shuffle in.

“Sorry the place is kind of topsy-turvy,” Faye waved over her head, another box getting laid down into her floor, “We’re expecting a raid tonight, and I’d rather not get thrown into jail.”

Erwin’s eyes roamed the room, taking in all the boxes, and the panel in the wall with a few boxes next to it. “A raid?” he asked, tilting his head in curiosity while Faye whipped her head around to stare at the commander.

He was tall, standing just a few inches shorter than Mike, and easily towering over Faye. It was bizarre to stare at Mike next to Erwin, because while Mike was somewhat skinny and lanky, Erwin was built with huge muscles, adding to his daunting frame. His shoulders were pulled back in a proud and commanding pose, while his lips were set into a thin line. His eyes wandered the room, his thick eyebrows raised while he carefully took in the boxes littering the floor before he settled on Faye, whose stomach gave a lurch.

“Faye, this is Commander Erwin,” Mike quickly introduced his superior, shooting an anxious glance down at Faye, silently pleading with her not to screw this up.

“And the list of high ranking officers grows,” Faye muttered, getting to her feet and dusting her hands off, offering a hand to Erwin to shake. “Faye Jaeger, unlicensed doctor and owner of The Tea House,” she introduced. Erwin’s hand clasped around hers, shaking firmly. His lips curled up into a small, off-putting smile, and Faye was quick to release his hand. “Feel free to take a seat on the bed or chair. I’ve still got some boxes to hide, so you’ll need to excuse my multitasking.”

Levi took a seat on the edge of her bed, crossing his legs and observing the woman, who had resumed sitting on the floor and shoving cardboard boxes beneath the boards. Mike opted to stand near the window, glancing out of it broodily while Erwin sat down on her chair by the desk.

“So what brings everyone here today?” She drawled dryly.

“I’ve been getting migraines,” Levi started, stoically leaning back to look down at Faye, who sat less than a foot away from him, ”They’ve been getting worse, and Squad Leader Mike suggested I come to see you about it.” He shifted in discomfort, unhappy to be revealing such a personal issue with a stranger. His fingers drummed over his knee in impatience. Faye glanced up at Mike, raising an eyebrow and tilting her head in a silent question, but Levi shot forward, grasping onto her elbow to get her attention and effectively halting her process of moving boxes around in the floor. “Oi, I’m your patient, not him,” he reminded, frowning when Faye’s jaw dropped just slightly.

He wasn’t being rough with her by any means, but the action still came as a surprise. His grip was firm, shaking her resolve, but in the end, Faye sighed, nodding. Captain Levi was right. She shouldn’t have looked to Mike for answers.

Erwin watched the interaction carefully. Faye hadn’t so much as flinched when Levi caught her elbow. Her jaw seemed to have slackened just slightly, but she was quick in bouncing back.

“Right,” she breathed, slowly pulling her arm out of Levi’s fingers, ignoring the disgusted glare he wore while he settled back onto her bed. “Migraines typically occur in people who are under severe stress, those who don’t sleep enough, and individuals who lack vitamins and minerals,” she started, while Levi sat back down on her bed begrudgingly. “When you grabbed me, your hands were a bit cold, which tells me your circulation isn’t the greatest, and you have bags underneath your eyes the size of titans.” She started replacing the flooring, “Your lack of height tells me—”

“Excuse me?” Levi stonily questioned, “What does my height have to do with my migraines?” She’d hit a sore spot, and Erwin watched her send up an annoyed glance.

“Listen, I’m not judging you. We’re in the same boat in that respect,” she huffed, motioning to herself. “We skipped out on all the vegetables and protein when we were kids, and that’s why we’re so short now,” she explained, “I don’t know about your current circ*mstances, but I’d suggest eating more greens and meat to—”

“Meat isn’t exactly easy to come by,” Levi snarkily pointed out.

“Take some time to go hunting during your next expedition then,” Faye countered. “It’ll help with your body mass, and you’ll be able to build up your muscles easier.” She shifted the last panel in, testing it by pressing down on the ends and making sure it didn’t accidentally fly up. “You’re also pretty ill-tempered—”

A strangled sound came from Levi at Faye’s words. ‘Ill-tempered?’ He had been perfectly polite to her this entire time, refraining from swearing at her like he would have with anyone else, and he had yet to insult her. If anything, she was insulting him.

“If I had to take a guess, you’re probably grouchy because you don’t get enough sleep,” she crawled over to the hole in the wall near Erwin, pushing more boxes out of sight, “I can give you some herbal tea to help with that.”

“That’s not real tea,” Levi quietly addressed.

“No,” Faye’s lips twitched into a small smile, “It’s not. But most people enjoy it more than traditional tea, and who am I to deny them?” It didn’t come as a surprise Faye used tea as a remedy; afterall, she owned a tea shop. “Anyways, I can also give you some pills to take, but I’ll need you to come back a few times this week to make sure you aren’t reacting badly to them,” she instructed, while the muscles in Levi’s jaw flexed.

“And if he does have a bad reaction?” Erwin voiced, watching the doctor’s sharp eyes flit to his direction.

“Then he stops taking them,” she shrugged. “Then there's the issue with your foul mood and stress,” she sighed, “I can’t really tell you how to feel, so there’s not much I can do.” Erwin leaned forward. He wasn’t expecting her to outright confess she couldn’t do anything. “Maybe you should see a massage therapist to relieve some of the tension you have,” Faye suggested, noting Levi’s stiff posture.

“What makes you think I’m…” Levi started to blurt out, apparently Faye’s comment had been eating away at him. “Ill-tempered?” he quoted, taking a deep breath and shutting his eyes in irritation.

Faye halted her movements for a second while Erwin blinked in surprise. Levi wasn’t usually one to let his emotions get the better of him, and he could count on one hand the few times he did.

“I don’t think you’re going to like what I have to say,” Faye chewed her lip, slowly lifting another box into the wall.

“If there’s something I can do to…” Levi scowled, “Improve,” it came out in a strangled hiss, “then I should at least hear what you have to say.”

“Let’s start with the fact that this is the second time I’ve treated you, and you have yet to introduce yourself,” Faye kept her hands and eyes trained on the boxes despite Levi making an awfully ungrateful sound, “You haven’t smiled once while in my presence, and yesterday, you all but threatened my coworker, who bandaged all the minor cuts and scrapes on you.” She snuck a glance up, noting the disgruntled frown he wore.

Erwin watched the scene with an amused glint in his eye. In all his years, he had yet to see someone turn Captain Levi inside out in such a calm and methodical manner. It was fascinating to watch the woman quip and display her brutal honesty.

“To be fair though,” she added, “I don’t know you all that well. It’s very likely that you don’t mean to come off so cold and unapproachable, and instead you’re just...” she trailed off, squinting her eyes at Levi, “socially awkward.”

Silence reverberated around the room while Faye and Levi stared at each other, lips pressed into a thin line.

“And what about my so-called tension?” Levi questioned, unable to disagree with her statement. He was offended by how blunt she’d been, picking him apart like it was an everyday occurrence, and he wasn’t sure he liked the way she read into his body language. “Where am I supposed to find a massage therapist?”

Erwin found himself nodding, agreeing with Levi’s obvious line of thinking. It was no secret that any massage parlour a citizen happened across was a front for prostitution, and the only massages their customers would receive were sexual.

“I suppose I could do it.” Faye hesitantly offered, “I wouldn’t call myself the most experienced, but I can definitely relieve the stress you’re holding.”

“Mike mentioned you gave him a massage when he hurt his back,” Erwin pointed out. “And he said he felt instant relief. Why would you say you aren’t an expert?” He kept his tone light and guarded.

“It’s just a massage. I’m not a chiropractor, and I’m not a massage therapist, so I can’t say I’m the most versed in that respect,” she shrugged, “But it doesn’t take a genius to knead out the skin and get rid of some knots.” Erwin watched her grab a piece of cardboard, expertly fitting it into the wall before she grabbed some sort of paste and began filling in the crevices,

“When do you propose we do this?” Levi stiffy asked.

“Not tonight,” came Faye’s response, “The Military Police are going to be arriving shortly, and I can’t give you any medication until they leave.”

“Why would they be interested in finding a doctor with no credentials?” Erwin questioned, brows furrowing. This seemed like something trivial for the MPs to get so worked up over.

“I’ve indirectly murdered a lot of people,” Faye muttered, feeling the air go stale while everyone turned to stare at her, “And the police tend to get cranky when people turn up poisoned every few months.” She did her best to finish filling in the space between the cardboard and the wall, dusting off her hands before she got to her feet. “It also doesn’t help that doctors in Mitras have gotten wind of me, and I doubt they’re happy my hard-earned money wasn’t spent getting into their university.”

She moved the desk, letting out a grunt when she pushed it back into place.

“When you say you’ve indirectly murdered people,” Mike started cautiously, watching the woman kneel on the balls of her feet to inspect the hidden panel in the wall.

“Doesn’t happen often,” she admitted, “But I have a drug that effectively ruins the internal organs once ingested. From what I hear, it’s pretty painful.” Her eyes roved around the room, carefully checking for any discrepancies. “I get some interesting customers every so often looking to settle a score.”

“If you knew I was a soldier, why didn’t you kill me?” Mike softly asked, confusion melting away his usual stoic attitude.

“That’s not something I enjoy doing,” Faye idly confessed, “I’m here to help people, not play god.”

“And do you believe in one?” Erwin inquired, “A god, I mean?”

“Who am I to say something doesn’t exist just because I’ve never witnessed it?”

She’d answered his question by eluding it, and Erwin locked his jaw, raising an eyebrow in wonder.

“Moving on,” Faye clapped her hands, effectively dismissing the dour atmosphere, “Why don’t I get us all some tea, and you can all get a front row seat to me evading execution?” She said it with such a confident smile, that Levi thought he’d misheard her.

Faye made quick work of ushering the three military personnel down the stairs, though she halted at the sight of Alexander sitting at a table looking miserable out of his mind with his sister.

“Make yourselves at home; I’ll be right with you,” she said distractedly, quickly pointing at a small stand near the door, “The menus are just over there.” She didn’t stop to look behind her before she made her way forward, keeping her chin held high.

“Hey,” Faye greeted, shooting a smile down at Alexander when she neared the table. “How are you guys enjoying the tea?” She could feel a hostile stare burning a hole into her forehead.

“Faye, maybe you should—” Alexander meekly grabbed Faye’s hand, ready to suggest she stay near the till and away from the table, but his sister intervened with a spiteful glare.

“Petra Ral,” her hand shot out, ripping Faye’s fingers away from Alexander’s, “Alexander’s older sister.” She was curt with Faye, firmly gripping her hand and shaking it somewhat aggressively.

“Nice to finally meet you,” Faye sent a strained smile. “Alexander talks about you all the time, he says you’re really skilled—”

“Cut the sh*t,” Petra snapped, her ginger hair flying while she whipped her head to fix Alexander with a glare. “You’ve been working a menial job for too long. I think it’s high time you signed yourself up for the military.”

It was at that moment that Faye decided she did not, in fact, like Petra Ral.

“I’m happy here,” Alexander mumbled, “Mom doesn’t have to work anymore, and we use the extra money to send you—”

“I never asked for the money,” Petra spat, “This is a pathetic job, and you’re disgracing our family. You’re smearing my name in the mud—”

“Is this because I called Captain Levi a dick? Because if it is—”

“You what?” It came out in a low hiss, and Petra’s soft brown eyes nearly bulged out of her head as she fixed an incredulous stare at her brother, “That’s my Captain you insulted.” Faye shifted nervously. Petra wore a wild and erratic facial expression, and in Faye’s experience, people like that were unhinged. “You can’t just insult someone with such a high status.”

“Oh, but you get to insult me?” Alexander retorted hotly, fingers curling into his palm.

“Captain Levi deserves respect and admiration for all of his effort in aiding mankind,” Petra clung tightly to her idolised version of her captain, and Faye tilted her head wondering where her blind faith stemmed from. “And you’re a piece of sh*t who sits in a tea shop all day taking our hard work for granted.”

“Hey,” Faye’s voice had gone low as she interrupted Petra, “Let me remind you that our taxes— our hard-earned money— goes into funding your expeditions and resources.” Petra defiantly glared up at Faye, but she faltered when she noted the hard look in her eyes. “I’ll have you know that Alexander and I work hard to keep our business running, so I would appreciate it if you didn’t discredit us so quickly.”

“You want to compare a job working in a tea shop to killing titans?” Petra challenged, “You try watching your colleagues get their limbs chomped off, and eaten alive.” She snarled, her hand slamming into the table. “Risking your life everyday hoping your death will mean something, anything.” Faye’s teeth gnashed together, fleeting memories of a life she’d long abandoned flashing before her eyes for a split second. Her mother’s tears on her cheek, a grinning titan dawdling off into the distance, her father begging and pleading for her life to be spared. Months spent without proper food or water, fearing for her life every second of every day. “While pigs like you sit safely behind the walls, blind to the titans that keep us penned in.”

“I never said your job wasn’t difficult or useless,” Faye started. “I just said that Al and I work—”

“Al and you?” Petra let out a bitter, humourless laugh, “What? Now you have pet names for each other? How cute.” Maybe it was the lack of sleep or the way Faye seemed immune to her anger, but Petra leapt forward, knocking her chair back and swinging her arm out to smoke Faye’s cheek, sending the woman stumbling backwards.

Alexander, thankfully, had also leapt up from his chair the same time his sister did, and he caught Faye by her shoulders, steadying his coworker and gently guiding her over to his chair.

The shop had gone quiet, everyone watching the exchange with wide eyes.

“Alright everyone,” Alexander called out in a sheepish tone, “The tea is on the house, but we have some family matters to attend to, so we’re closing up shop for today.” A chorus of complaints and whispers sounded out, but they fell upon deaf ears, Alexander had already shuffled over to the door, holding it open for everyone, “Yeah, I know, I know. sh*tty timing, I’m sorry. Have a nice day. Don’t worry about paying. Nope, keep it moving. Everyone out.”

Meanwhile, Mike had kneeled in front of Faye, turning her cheek to inspect the tender skin which had already started to bruise, and he clicked his tongue, trying to think of something to say. Faye’s eyes had tears welling up in them, but her lips stayed pulled into a thin line, and her chin remained still.

“Petra, let’s take a breather.” It was one of Petra’s teammates that hooked their arm around her shoulder and guided her out the door to decompress just outside the shop.

Erwin remained seated, tilting his head while his eyes flickered between Faye, Alexander and Petra, frowning. Levi, on the other hand, let out an irritated sigh, and started following behind Petra, intending to see her out and ask her about it all.

“Damn,” Faye muttered out, “I wish I hadn’t packed all my supplies away.” She pursed her lips, blinking and forcing the tears to dissipate. “I think I’m getting a headache from all the drama today.”

“You’re already bruising,” Mike murmured, gently feathering his fingers over the darkening skin, “Do you have anything to numb—”

“It’s all tucked away inside the walls and floor,” Faye couldn’t help the incredulous laugh that bubbled past her throat and out her lips, shaking her head, “What the hell?” The world was tilting on its axis, and there Faye was, teetering on the edge of a mental breakdown.

She didn’t have time for this sh*t.

“I have the MPs coming in a few minutes, d’you want some tea?” She’d already gotten to her feet, completely disregarding the throbbing pain in her cheek.

“Faye,” Mike scrambled up from where he’d been kneeling. “Wait, are you okay?” His eyebrows had knitted together while he fell into step beside the woman who’d saved his life twice over.

“Yeah,” Faye gave a curt nod, “Peachy.” She didn’t halt her movements, and she was quick to pour herself a cup of steaming tea in the kitchen. “Go ask your commander what he wants to drink.”

Alexander shuffled in just as Mike slid out the door. He kept his eyes on the ground while a lump formed in his throat. “I didn’t mean for her to—”

“Don’t worry about it,” Faye dismissed, “I deserved a good sucker punch anyways.” It was the lopsided grin she shot Alexander caused his stomach to twist, and he felt the guilt smother him.

“Not for that,” he whispered, “You didn’t deserve sh*t.”

Erwin and Mike strolled leisurely through the door, standing a few feet away from Faye who leaned against the counter.

“What can I get you boys?” She ignored the perplexed and quizzical look the two scouts gave her. “Is oolong alright?” She didn’t wait for an answer, already pouring them a cup each and motioning to the dining table in the corner, “Take a seat, let me know what you think of the tea.”

“Faye,” Mike tried, as he took a seat beside Erwin, “I’m s—”

“Water under the bridge,” Faye insisted, her voice constricting tightly.

“Doctor Jaeger—” It was Erwin this time.

“Faye.” She gave a tight lipped smile.

“Faye,” Erwin started again. “How can I repay—”

“Drop it. That’s how.” Her fingers drummed against her teacup, which she held as though it were a coffee mug. The same way her father used to hold his morning coffee when she was little. It looked bizarre with a teacup, but there weren't very many mugs in the walls.

Levi sauntered in through the door, a frown tugging his lips down while he took a seat next to Mike, though Petra seemed to be the only one missing. It wasn’t that the kitchen was small, or couldn’t hold that many people, but it was a foreign feeling to have so many people congregate in the back room of her tea shop. The walls seemed like they were caving in, and Faye took a long sip of her tea, trying to push away her claustrophobia.

“Help yourselves, it’s on the house,” Faye gave a vague motion to the various teapots on the stove and the bread that sat on a glass tray. She took another sip, savouring the taste. “You have a loyal soldier,” Faye stated, catching Levi’s eye. Anything to ease the palpable tension in the room.

“She shouldn’t have assaulted you like that,” he said the words slowly, in a bit of a daze, and he poured himself a cup of tea from the pot that sat on the table.

“Karma for insulting you earlier,” Faye gave a cheeky smile, praying that Mike and Alexander couldn’t see past it.

Levi gave a curt snort. “Mike, why don’t you present her with our gift?” He’d worded it as a question, though his tone indicated it was an order.

“Yeah,” the scruffy blond man murmured. He took a long stride forward, easily closing the distance in three steps, and Mike rummaged around in his pocket to hand over a small box, wrapped in brown paper with twine.

“I can’t—” Faye had started to say, but the box was shoved into her hand regardless.

“We were going to give it to you anyways, so we might as well lighten up the sour mood,” Levi pressed.

“It’s for taking care of Mike and Levi,” Erwin spoke up, leaning back in her chair to carefully watch Faye. “A sign of our appreciation, if you will.”

“But I didn’t do anything...” Faye trailed off, chewing her lip. “I’m going to feel indebted to you.”

“Why do you think we went through the trouble of finding a gift for you?” Mike dryly asked, “Open it up already.” When Faye peeked up at Mike, he wore a persistent frown, one that silently informed her that she couldn’t refuse so easily.

They all watched Faye pull the string off and peel the paper back, staring at the brown leather box for a second before she sighed and pulled it open.

“This looks expensive,” the words came out weakly, and she stared at Mike while her stomach flopped. It was a silver circle shaped locket, no bigger than a penny. Engraved on the front was the Scouting Regiment’s crest: the Wings of Freedom. “I can’t accept this.”

“Faye,” Alexander glanced between her and the locket. “You can pawn this and get a hefty price—”

“Oi, don’t pawn our gift away,” Levi snapped. “We went through the trouble of picking it out, so you better wear the sh*tty necklace,” He ordered before Erwin’s hand clamped over his shoulder, silently urging the short captain to relax.

Faye blinked dumbly down at the necklace, her head throbbing almost as much as her cheek did. “I guess I’ll wear it?” she mumbled, at a loss for words.

Everyone watched Alexander fasten the metal around Faye’s neck, silently agreeing that they had settled on the right piece of jewellery for the illicit doctor. It wasn’t flashy or tacky, and it seemingly went nicely with her plain shirt.

They all jumped skittishly when a thump sounded from the front of the shop before a bunch of footsteps echoed out into the kitchen.

“Faye Jaeger?” a man who barked from the front of the shop, nearly causing Faye to drop her cup of tea.

“Coming!”

She made her way out of the kitchen, the scouts hot on her heels to witness the scene before them.

A dozen soldiers stood, blocking off the exits of Faye’s store, and one stood at the forefront, holding papers out for Faye to take a look at.

“Faye Jaeger,” he once again addressed. He had a short mop of black hair, and sported a red bolo tie, identifying him as the leader. “We have a warrant to search the premises. You are under suspicion for offering medical services without a licence, as well as being linked to the deaths of several citizens in Wall Rose and Sina,” he gruffly stated, shoving the papers forward for Faye to gloss over. “Should we find any evidence supporting the accusations against you, you will be imprisoned and tried to decide your fate.” He watched Faye nod, taking the papers from him. “Start with the upstairs; I want this place turned inside out,” he ordered, watching his men rush forward and up the stairs.

“Nile,” Erwin interjected, sending a pleasant smile at his fellow commander, “How have you been?” He clapped a hand over Nile Dok’s shoulder, watching the gears in Nile’s head turn at a breakneck pace. What in the world was Erwin Smith doing here?

“Erwin,” He nodded, “Here on business?” His eyes slid over to Faye, who was still shuffling through his papers in deep concentration.

“I dragged everyone here,” Levi cut in, sending an unimpressed grimace up at Commander Nile. “The brother of one of my soldiers works here, and I heard the tea was above average.”

Nile raised an eyebrow, assessing whether or not Levi was being honest.

“Can I get you some tea?”

Chapter 7: 3. Of Rings and Cardiac Arrest

Chapter Text

Maybe the Military Police weren’t as dumb as Faye initially thought.

When she had been taken aside to be interrogated, Erwin had gone upstairs to watch Commander Nile Dok’s cronies push aside her furniture and make a mess of her bedroom, and they had almost uncovered her secret stash several times. Had Erwin not been there to subtly redirect them elsewhere, she would have been caught red handed.

Then Nile Dok questioned Faye about her first aid kit, and why she had scalpels and a suture kit packed away inside, leaving the illicit doctor to lie and say her father had gifted it to her years ago when she first moved to Trost, which then led to the inspection of her immigration papers.

In addition, she was thoroughly questioned about the spare bedroom she had upstairs that was filled with plants and herbs, leaving Faye to tell them it was all for tea (she’d been smart enough to relocate the plants she couldn’t explain into the wall behind one of her cupboards). And they left with the promise they would be visiting again for a surprise inspection at some point during the month.

Since then, Erwin had made it a habit to drop by during the afternoon with Mike and occasionally Levi, and he would insist Faye take a break to have tea with them before he pestered her about joining the Scout Regiment. After a week of this, Faye had found her patience thinning out.

“Tell them I’m out,” Faye ordered from her bedroom upstairs.

“Mike can smell you,” Alexander pointed out dryly, “So unless you want to climb out the window, you’re going to have to— hey!” He hadn’t actually expected Faye to shove open her window and start shimmying through it, but when she did, his eyes widened, and he hurried to tug her back in. “You can’t just leave like that— God, Faye, what have you been eating?”

“I’m not sitting through it again,” Faye hissed, squeezing her ass through the small window. “I mean it. I’m going to— Wait a second, did you just call me fat?” She halted her movements to send a questioning look up at Alexander, who froze in place for a moment. “Whatever, I have been eating a lot of bread lately,” she confessed, shrugging his comment off before she continued her escape.

“Mike is just going to sniff you out,” Alexander insisted, tightly gripping Faye's hand in vain. She was more than halfway out, and it would be a miracle if Alexander could actually wrestle her back through. “It’s only an hour; don’t make me deal with them.”

“Screw that,” Faye grunted, twisting her shoulders to squeeze through the window, “Every day of the week he’s asked me the same question: ‘Faye, why don’t you join the scouts? You could make a great asset to our team,’” She mimicked, ripping her hands out of Alexander’s. “And then we go around in circles. I’m done playing his stupid game.” She started scaling the wall on a ledge, ignoring the questioning stares of the onlookers.

“What am I supposed to tell them?” Alexander called from the window, while Faye braced herself before she pounced to the side, landing on her neighbour’s patio.

“That I died,” she retorted, carefully climbing over the railing before she held tightly to the bottom of the bars and dangled before she dropped to the ground.

“Wait! Of what?” Alexander hollered.

“Uh—” she stuttered over her words, freezing in place for a moment when she locked eyes with Erwin Smith, who stood inside her tea shop at the window, watching her. “Embarrassment,” she called back, still staring at Erwin, “And tell him it’s a no today too.” She stayed glued to the spot, waiting for Erwin to blink, talk, do something. And when he finally opened his lips, still staring at her, Faye turned on her heel and sprinted like her life f*cking depended on it.

The guard tipped his head in recognition as he usually did when he saw Faye, and she easily slid through the doors, taking a seat at the bar where Bertha was wiping down a cup.

“Haven’t seen you in a while. I take it you avoided the MPs?” Bertha questioned, leaning on the bar.

“Yes, ma’am. I’m out of the frying pan and into the fire,” Faye grumbled bitterly, a sour look on her face, “I have the Commander of the Scouting Regiment breathing down my neck now, insisting I join.”

“Commander Erwin?” If Bertha wasn’t interested before, she certainly was now, “He comes in here every month,” She informed her, “Likes to—”

“Okay, Bertha, please don’t ruin the man’s image for me,” Faye cut in, lips curled down in disgust, “I don’t think I want to know what he likes to do in bed, especially when he’s trying to recruit me.” An involuntary shiver ran down her spine while she forced her brain to reset. “Anyway, do you think I can hide away in one of the rooms here for an hour?”

“How much are you going to pay me?” Bertha asked. Faye scrunched her nose up, digging around in her pocket and clutching onto whatever pocket money she had, dropping it on the counter. “Two dollars?” Bertha squinted, “No deal.”

“I’m desperate,” Faye dramatically cried, “You can’t hide me away? Just for a few minutes?”

“No,” Bertha’s eyes trailed over to the door, and she leaned forward, “But I can tell you that Commander Erwin and two soldiers just walked in, and they’re heading this way.” Faye stiffened, heart thudding loudly in her chest. “Take the back door, and give me some entertainment; the short one looks ready to pop a blood vessel.”

Faye didn’t need to be told twice, and she leapt over the bar, hearing Mike yell her name from a distance. She refused to look back. No. It would only slow her down. Instead, she took off towards the kitchens, flying past the cooks with blinding speed before she circled around into the pantry and up the servants quarters. It was pure luck that most brothels used the same general layout, and having worked in one for two years before she moved to Trost, she easily manoeuvered down the corridor and took a left, taking the stairs back down two at a time.

Bertha was exactly where Faye had left her, and when she had looped back into the bar, she gave the prostitute a cheeky smile, successfully exiting the establishment.

Unfortunately, the moment she slammed open the back door, her elbow was seized, and whoever it was that grabbed her, used her momentum to throw her down to the ground. In her disoriented state, they pinned her wrists and scowled.

“You made me walk through that sh*tty bar,” Levi growled, “It’s f*cking disgusting in there. And the smell—” Faye blinked when he actually started to heave, and for a second, she felt genuinely guilty. But it was only for a fleeting second, and when Levi had leaned down to start vomiting, Faye wrenched her hands out of his, and her fingers shot over to where his shoulder met his chest, jabbing into his pressure point. She didn’t bother sticking around to see his expression when his hand and forearm went numb though.

She staggered to her feet, sending down an apologetic frown at the man she left throwing up outside the brothel, and she ran through the streets, pushing past the citizens of Trost and blending into the crowd.

When Mike and Erwin trailed after her, they both stared down at Levi, who was hunched over a small puddle of what used to be the contents of his stomach. He was clutching onto his hand with the deepest scowl either had ever seen on Levi’s face.

“Damn,” Mike grunted, helping Levi to his feet and handing him a handkerchief, “She got the run on you too?”

“I had her,” Levi snapped, “But if you had just let me circle around the exterior like I wanted to, we wouldn’t be in this situation.” He wiped his mouth, deciding his whole day had effectively been ruined. “She did something to my hand,” he tried to flex his fingers, but they only twitched.

Erwin smiled up at the sky. He would be back tomorrow. And the day after, and so on. This was too golden an opportunity to let slip through his fingers. After all, it wasn’t everyday someone bested Humanity’s Strongest.

*

Faye let out a sigh when the bell over her door rang, and Alexander nudged her, willing her to look up. Captain Levi was dressed out of uniform, without Erwin or Mike accompanying him. Despite the lack of uniform, his clothing still looked formal: a white button down shirt and dress pants, an oversized suit jacket on his shoulders .

“He looks like a model,” Alexander whispered beside Faye, shamelessly eyeing the Captain, “If you don’t sleep with him, I will.”

“You’d better be careful,” Faye quipped, watching him stalk closer to the counter, “You might mysteriously disappear tonight if he hears you.” She kept her eyes trained on the pot of tea while she poured a cup, nudging it in front of her for Levi.

“Erwin sent me to pick up the medicine you prescribed last week,” his lips tilted up in what he hoped seemed less grumpy and more welcoming, but it looked more like a grimace.

“Yeah, if you have some extra time, I can give you that massage right now too,” Faye offered, nervously shifting her weight onto one foot while Levi tipped the teacup back, savouring the taste.

“Yeah, do you want me to head upstairs or..?” He didn’t understand why he was being so awkward. No. Scratch that. He knew it was because he had been thinking about the doctor the entire evening, brooding over the fact that she had thrown him off of her while he was heaving the contents of his stomach on the ground, and after that, his brain went off on a tangent, overanalyzing every word she had ever spoken to him.

It bothered him when she said he was unapproachable and grumpy. It had nagged at his brain the entire night, and he had tried to brush it off because he was like that with everyone. He didn’t get too attached, he kept his distance, and he tried his best not to step out of line. It wasn’t his fault that she was too thick headed to realise that.

Except that she wasn’t.

She had hit the nail on the head when she said he was socially awkward, and she called him out for it. And maybe — just maybe — his pride and ego had taken a hit because of that.

“I’ll be up in a minute. I’m just going to grab you a tin of herbal tea,” Faye said, while Levi nodded and spun on his heel, oblivious to Alexander’s prying eyes.

“You’ve got some drool,” Faye motioned to Alexander’s chin, watching his face heat up while he rushed to wipe it off.

Alexander shot her a dirty look while she prepared Levi’s tin, a smug smile on her face. “It’s not my fault he’s attractive,” he shrugged, “I don’t know how you control yourself around them. I mean, have you seen Erwin?” Alexander licked his lips. “Tall, blond, handsome. Who wouldn’t want a piece of that? And Levi? I’ll bet you he’s rough in—”

“Stop objectifying my patients,” Faye ordered, pressing down on the lid, “They might be persistent, but they still deserve respect.” She watched her coworker roll his eyes mockingly.

“All I’m saying is that you could have the hottest threesome with him and Erwin,” Alexander pulled his hands up in surrender at the dirty look Faye shot him.

“Next time you mention it today, I’m telling Captain Levi,” Faye warned, “I’ll be back down in an hour, but if you want to close up early tonight, feel free.” She waited for Al to give a nod before she trailed up the stairs to Levi.

He was sitting on her bed, staring down at his hands, and she cleared her throat nervously to get his attention.

“I’m really sorry about yesterday,” she blurted out the words before she could think too hard about it, and Levi whipped his head up to stare at her, seemingly startled. “It was really sh*tty of me to leave you like that, and I feel bad that you had to walk through Bertha’s bar. I know the smell is awful, and it’s dirty and I didn’t realise it would have made you feel so sick.” Her back felt rigid and stiff while she held her breath, waiting for some sort of reaction.

“Erwin shouldn’t have been so pushy,” Levi slowly admitted. “He should have realised you needed some time when you jumped out of your window just to avoid the confrontation.” His lips tilted up into the well-meaning grimace again, and he snorted softly. “Who scales out of a two story building just to escape a conversation?” He was making an effort to be nice, and he sincerely hoped Faye realised that.

“The same person who runs an illegal hospital,” Faye quipped. “Anyway,” she held out the tin to Levi, who gratefully accepted, “I wrote some instructions on the inside, and I’ll grab your sleeping medication after your massage.” She chewed her lip for a second before adding, “Do you also want some pills to help your headaches? Just in case your sleeping habits aren't the root of the problem?”

“Yeah,” he mumbled, “If you don’t mind.” They stared at each other for a painfully awkward moment.

“Okay, well, I’ll just go grab some muscle relaxant, you should probably take off your shirt and get settled in on the bed,” Faye suggested blankly. She closed the door behind her before she quietly raced down the stairs, catching Alexander’s eyes.

“I don’t know what's wrong with him,” she hissed. “I apologised for yesterday and I think he tried to smile and joke, but it was so… out of character, which made me look like an idiot.”

“He tried to smile?” Al squinted his eyes, trying to conjure a mental image before his lips pulled down into an uncomfortable frown, “Yeah, that’s… Not a pretty sight.”

“How do I fix this?” Faye swept her hair to the top of her head, putting it all into a messy bun.

“Ask him about his hobbies? I don’t f*cking know!” Alexander snapped. “You’ve been on more dates with men than I have.”

“I was 13, and I was selling my body for money,” Faye stressed. “I hardly think that counts.”

“Just talk about yourself until he latches onto something familiar,” Alexander snarkily replied, “It worked with that Garrison soldier.”

Faye reached under the counter, grabbing onto a jar of the muscle relaxant. “Yeah,” she nodded, “Alright. Sure, I can talk about myself.” She kept mumbling to herself while she made her way back up the stairs, knocking on the door before letting herself in.

“You took so long, I thought you were taking a sh*t,” Levi voiced, face down on Faye’s bed.

There was a long stretch of silence where Faye stood in the doorway, clutching her jar, knitting her eyebrows together. She drummed her finger on the jar, trying to determine if he was trying to be funny or condescending. How was she even supposed to respond to that?

“To be honest, I have no clue where we stand right now,” Faye bluntly stated, her feet glued to the ground, “Are we acquaintances, or friends? I mean, I literally kicked you off of me yesterday, and now I don’t know how to act around you.” She watched Levi sit himself up to stare at her, deadpan.

“What the f*ck are you talking about?” he questioned, tilting his head.

“Well, like,” Faye pursed her lips. She sounded like a spoiled teenager. “I’ve only been talking to you for the last five minutes, but this whole time has just been cripplingly awkward, and I’m struggling to read you.” The words all came out in a rush. “You’re not acting like yourself, and I’m—” What, was she worried? Because he wasn’t acting like an asshole? “confused.”

Levi felt his shoulders tense. So it hadn’t just been him that felt out of place. Her words from a week ago echoed inside his head, reverberating loudly, and he did the only thing he could think of to appease his brain: he slid off the bed, padded over to where Faye was standing and stuck his hand forward.

“I’m Levi.”

He watched her hesitantly raise her hand to meet his, and he gave her a firm handshake like he had seen Erwin do a million times before, and he forced his lips to curl into a smile, but it looked off-putting because of his furrowed brows. “I like black tea.” His lips curled back down; it was too much of a strain, and it made him uncomfortable. “And you were right when you said I was acting like an asshole.” He had to force the words out, and they came out in an aggressively embarrassed tone.

“I’m Faye,” her jaw had slackened just slightly, and she wracked her brain for something to say, “I also like black tea, and I’m sorry I offended you?” She winced when Levi’s eyes narrowed. This was by far the most uncomfortable situation she’d ever found herself stuck in.

They kept shaking each other’s hand, their crippling social awkwardness on full display to the other.

“No, but seriously,” Faye voiced, “Does this mean we’re friends now? Or are we strangers that just shook each other's hand for a minute straight because neither of us know how to deal with this situation?” She swallowed while Levi’s hand slid out of hers, and raised an eyebrow.

“It’s going to be a sh*tty friendship if you keep questioning it.”

“Aye aye, Captain,” Faye gave a mock salute, grinning, “Well, now that that’s out of the way, you go lay down, I’m going to put some gloves on and I’ll see if I can ease the tension in your back.” She was quick to bounce back from the awkward situation, and Levi was grateful he didn’t have to try and smile back at her.

Levi resumed his position on her bed, face resting on his arms.

“So what made you want to join the scouts?” Faye asked, sliding on some gloves while Levi let out a soft hum.

“What makes you so apprehensive about joining?” he fired back, grunting when she started kneading into his shoulder. He did his best not to cringe at the contact, but his lips twisted to a disgusted frown.

“My brother is graduating in a few weeks, and that’s the regiment he wants to join,” Faye admitted, “It’s been his goal since he was a kid, and I don’t want to steal his thunder.”

“He’d get over—sh*t—” His muscles had started to grow tender, and his shoulder dug into the bed. “He’d get over it.”

“He’s pretty stubborn,” Faye dryly admitted, “I think he’d feel betrayed and babied, and it would be hypocritical of me to force that on him.” It was safe for Faye to assume Levi hated her touching his back by the way he flinched under her hands. Hegroaned painfully the more she loosened the muscles and tendons.

“Why do you— Ease up a bit, that f*cking hurts,” Levi snapped, “Why would you think that?”

“Sorry,” Faye tried slathering on more muscle relaxant, hoping that would help, “I moved out at fifteen, and now that he’s fifteen, it would be unfair of me to barge in on his life,” She was gentler in massaging the knot out of his shoulder.

“So why’d you move out in the first place?” Levi almost regretted asking when he felt Faye’s fingers falter, but it was only for a split second, and she seemed to recover her pace with ease.

“Too much trauma in Shiganshina,” she shrugged, “I worked at a brothel when I turned 13, and most of the men started recognizing me on the street.” The words came out bitterly, “It was either I moved or I died. There was no other option.”

“Understandable,” Levi murmured softly, “My mom was a prostitute too.” He wasn’t sure why he was telling Faye this, but the words had slipped past his lips, and it was too late to take them back. “She died when I was pretty young though, so I don’t have a lot of memories of her.”

Faye was half tempted to tell Levi that she watched her mother get turned into a titan when she was seven, but she bit the comment down.

“Yeah, every now and then I’d get these fleeting memories of my mom,” she hesitantly shared, “They don’t even feel like my own anymore. It’s like they’re from another life.”

They slipped into a comfortable silence, both mulling over what the other revealed.

*

Levi’s heart thudded loudly in his chest when he jutted out a hand and startled himself awake. The bed was softer than the one back at base, and for a second, his stomach lurched. He was shirtless, his back was sweating, and he felt disoriented, like he had been a soccer ball getting kicked around by a bunch of titans. He stretched his back out on the bed, hearing his bones crack, and he realised with horror that he felt virtually weightless. And for a split second, he wondered if he was dead.

No.

If he were dead, he wouldn’t be so conscious, and his bones wouldn’t have cracked so loudly.

He blinked the bleariness from his eyes, which had started adjusting to the dark room. He was still in Faye’s room. How long had he been sleeping for? When had he even fallen asleep? He grunted when he forced himself to sit up, gritting his teeth when his feet met the cold wood of the floor. Why was her room so chilly?

He was up in a blink of an eye, buttoning up his shirt and shrugging on the loose jacket. When he rolled his shoulders back, they cracked again, and he tilted his head at how sore his back was. It was strange. Despite how tender his back was, it felt equally as good.

He came padding down the stairs, running a hand through his hair while he held onto the tin of herbal tea and two vials of pills. He was relaxed, and it felt bizarre.

“Morning,” Faye called from the register, sending a small smile up at him. There were three other customers, all clustered around a table gossiping, and they hardly spared Levi a second glance when he pulled a chair up to the counter and plunked himself down. “Can I get you some tea?”

“Black, please,” Levi replied, leaning on the counter as Faye disappeared through the door for a second before returning with two teacups and a whole pot. He glanced behind his back at the small clock over the door: 8:00pm. He had wasted an entire day. He felt the steam softly brush his face when she poured him a cup, setting it onto a saucer in front of him. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“I tried to,” Faye let a smile slip, “You whacked my forehead and swore at me though.” He had? He didn’t even remember that. He must have been really out of it. He watched her reach under the counter, pulling out some bread which had been pre-sliced and setting it down on a napkin between them. “How does your back feel? Any better?”

“Yeah, thanks,” he brought the tea to his lips, savouring it. It was better than what they sold in Mitras, which was impressive. It tasted different though, more citrusy and sweet, but not so much that it was overpowering. It was just right. “How do you make your tea?” It was small talk, but at least he was genuinely curious about it.

“It’s mostly handpicked and grown in the spare room upstairs,” Faye grinned. “Alexander and I spent years perfecting the ratios and tinkering around with the blends.” She put a lot of time and effort into her tea shop. It wasn’t surprising. He could see her experimenting with different flavours during her spare time.

He glanced over his shoulder, assessing the room while he gave a small hum. Looked like Petra’s brother had gone home for the day.

“Is this what you do all day?” he questioned, sounding unimpressed, “Sit behind your counter and watch other people drink your tea?” He helped himself to a slice of bread, breaking off a piece and haphazardly throwing it into his mouth.

“No, I balance the books, clean the tables and the kitchen, keep things orderly,” Faye shrugged, “I also tend to work on prescriptions for my patients while I’m down here too,” She held up a vial and a jar of pills she had taken from a shelf on the counter.

“What would you do if an MP walked in and told you he had personal witnesses stating they saw you filling prescriptions during the day?” His nose scrunched up at the thought. The MPs were kind of stupid, and he doubted they would actually get very far into an investigation against Faye. They had already tried once, and he couldn’t imagine Nile Dok barging in again without sufficient proof.

“Why? Are you planning on tipping them off?” Faye asked sarcastically.

“I might, if you ever serve me sh*tty tea,” Levi halfheartedly threatened, watching her lips curl just slightly.

“I’m not much of a fighter—” Faye started, only for Levi to scoff.

“That’s bullsh*t,” he cut in, “You threw me off of you so swiftly the other day, I thought you might have had experience with one-on-one combat.”

“Not really,” Faye scratched the back of her neck somewhat nervously, “My parents signed me up for a few self-defence classes when I was younger. But it was so long ago, I think I was working off muscle memory.”

He hummed again while Faye looped a finger through her teacup to hold, and Levi let his head tilt.

“You don’t hold your teacup by the handle?” he asked, narrowing his eyes just slightly at the way she held the cup.

“Like you’re one to talk,” Faye quipped, jutting her chin to Levi’s fingers which held his own cup by the rim.

“So why does your brother want to join the scouts?” Levi asked, trying to fill the silence.

“He and his best friends want to see the world outside the walls,” Faye started slowly, “But when Shiganshina was breached, he saw his mom get eaten, and that goal morphed with his newfound twisted hatred for the titans,” she chewed her lip for a second, furrowing her eyebrow, “I’m worried for him; his anger and hot headedness are going to get him killed.”

Levi dipped his head, nodding, “I’ve seen that happen to some of my comrades. It’s not a pretty sight.”

Faye swallowed thickly, “Do you think you could keep an eye on him—”

“I can’t promise he won’t die on the field,” Levi cut in, a grim frown darkening his features.

“sh*t happens,” Faye sighed. “I’m not asking you to jump in and save his ass, but it would make me feel better if I knew Humanity’s Strongest was at least watching over him for me,” she explained, watching Levi’s shoulders roll back.

“He has the same last name as you?” he gruffly questioned, and Faye nodded. “I’ll keep him in mind.” That was the best he could promise. And he supposed it was the least he could do since it wasn’t like he had paid Faye for treating him. He sighed into his cup.

It was just as Faye had started to lean back in her seat with a satisfied grin that the door to The Tea House slammed open, and a wide-eyed Alexander stood in the doorway, sopping wet from the rain outside.

“Faye, you gotta help my mom,” he wheezed, “She’s—” He looked like he was going to be sick, and his eyes had already started leaking, tears mixing in with the rivulets of rain. “She’s not breathing.”

Faye jumped off the stool immediately, leaning down and snatching a small duffel bag from the floor. “Get everyone out of here and lock up,” she ordered, slinging the bag around her neck and jumping over the counter. She had started to jog forward, and Levi found himself following closely. “Meet me back at yours.”

It was lucky Alexander only lived half a block away from the shop.

The door was wide open when Faye arrived, and she rushed forward to where the older woman lay at the base of a staircase, her husband frantically cupping her face, trying to speak to his wife.

Faye dropped to her knees on the other side of Mrs. Ral, leaning her head down and quietly listening before she swore loudly. The skin was still warm, but she wasn’t breathing. Blood leaked out of her nose, and had been smeared around gruesomely by Alexander’s father, who kept touching her face in a desperate attempt to evoke some sort of reaction.

“Give me some space,” she ordered, pushing the man's chest away, “How long ago did this happen?”

“I—” he took in an unsteady breath, shaking his head frantically. Levi could hear the crack in his voice, and he flinched at the raw emotion. “I don’t— don’t know.”

Levi stood in the doorway, watching with twisted, morbid interest as Faye Jaeger tilted the woman's head back before she started administering compressions to the middle-aged woman’s chest. He could hear her counting under her breath, keeping a steady rhythm. He cringed when he heard the woman’s ribs crack, the sound echoing out amidst the harsh pitter-patter of the rain. Faye had just broken a dead woman’s ribs. He started forward, his lips curling back in utter disgust.

What right did Faye have to desecrate a corpse like that? But then he watched the illicit doctor pinch the body’s nose, and tilt the chin upwards, and his eyebrows furrowed together when her lips met Mrs. Ral’s lips twice in quick succession, a second at a time, and then she went back to the chest compressions.

What the f*ck?

He snapped out of his daze when Faye leaned down for another kiss, and as he started to reach down, intending to rip Faye’s body off of Mrs. Ral, he froze.

Mrs. Ral suddenly gasped and then started sputtering, coughing, and hacking.

Levi’s prior question remained.

What the actual f*ck?

Mr. Ral scrambled forward to resume cupping his wife’s jaw while tears streamed down his face, and he started mumbling into her neck, sobbing.

“Try to keep still. It looks like you sprained your ankle, and I had to crack a few ribs to get your heart pumping again,” Faye said, shifting to tend to her ankle.

“Faye, how is—” Alexander had just arrived at the scene, eyes bloodshot, and seeing his mother patting his father’s back, his breath hitched, he swooped down beside his dad, hugging her torso.

It all happened in a blur; one second Faye was wrapping Mrs. Ral’s ankle, the next she had wrapped her ribs. She then dug a few jars out of her bag and placed them beside Alexander, muttered into his ear for a few minutes, and then she left.

Wasn’t she supposed to stay and keep the woman under observation or something? She had been dead. Little more than a corpse ten minutes ago. And now she was leaving? None of it made sense in Levi’s head, and after a second of staring at the place Faye had occupied just a moment ago, he turned on his heel and jogged to catch up to the insane doctor.

She was already up the stairs when he made it to her shop, hearing her taking the steps two at a time, and when he had caught up to her, he stood in her doorway, watching her rummage around in her desk.

“What the hell did you do to Petra’s mother?” he demanded. His mouth had gone dry, and he wasn’t sure if he felt amazed by her methods or disgusted.

“I jump-started her heart,” Faye said matter-of-factly, squinting down at a jar in the low light before she got to her feet, intending to slide past Levi in the doorway. Instead, he stepped to the side, and she knocked right into him. “What’s the matter with you? I need to run these pain meds over to Mrs. Ral, so unless you want her to suffer for longer than necessary, you’d better move your ass.” She frowned.

“I’ve never seen a doctor bring someone back from the dead like that,” Levi growled, standing his ground.

“What do you want from me?” she scowled, “I forced some air into her lungs and I got her heart to start beating again—”

“You cracked that woman’s ribs,” he snarled, taking a step forward., “You shouldn’t be anywhere near her after inflicting that kind of damage.”

“Fine,” Faye shoved her hands forward, dumping the pills into Levi’s hands, “You bring these to her, and you tell her to stay in bed for the next six weeks.” Faye instructed. “Alexander has the next three weeks off to help her recover. She also needs to start taking deeper breaths because if she doesn’t, the alveoli in her lungs could collapse, and she could catch pneumonia. Make sure you grab the can of tea labelled ‘Chamomile— Lavender and Valerian,’ and let her know that it’ll help put her to sleep.”

“How do I know you won’t run when I leave?” Levi questioned.

He watched Faye rub her cheek aggressively before she stomped over to her dresser, and opened the third drawer, grabbing something small, all but shoving it into Levi’s waiting palm.

“Family heirloom, it's the last thing I have of my mother,” she asserted. “Consider it my leash and collar.”

He grunted, pocketing the ring without so much as a second glance before he started down the stairs, trailing into the kitchen to grab the tea, and retracing his steps to the Ral household.

Alexander stood by the door, anxiously shifting from foot to foot, and when he saw Levi trailing up the street, his heart sank.

“Captain Levi,” his eyes darted behind him, searching for his coworker, and he frowned, “Where’s Faye?”

“At the shop,” Levi replied stiffly, noting the confused way Alexander’s brows furrowed, “I’m going to bring her back with me for questioning—”

“What?” Alarm bells sounded in Alexander’s head while he whipped his head down to gape at the short captain. “Why? You already knew she was running an illegal hospital, so why would you change your mind all of a sudden?” Alexander had started to try and brush past Levi, but Levi wrapped his fingers around the boy’s wrist, twisting it forwards and effectively halting the taller man.

“Here, Jaeger said your mother needs to stay in bed for six weeks, and she needs to start taking deeper breaths or she risks getting sick,” Levi placed the small jar and tin into the hand Levi had twisted, letting go of it roughly. “She said the tea will help put her to sleep, and she also said you have the next three weeks off.”

“Does that mean you’re bringing her back tomorrow then?” Alexander questioned, hope blooming in his chest.

“No.”

Levi didn’t even wait for Alexander to sputter out another question, marching back the way he came.

He knew she was a criminal. He knew. Levi knew better than anyone that no one escaped that sort of life so easily. She had confessed to selling poison, and indirectly murdering perfect strangers. So why had he even bothered with feeling sorry for behaving so poorly earlier? He knew better than that.

“You’re going to see Commander Erwin,” Levi stated, pulling Faye up by her wrist and twisting it behind her back, guiding her back down the stairs.

“Levi, I don’t get it,” Faye had already started down the steps, trying not to stumble or lose her balance, “What’s the problem?”

“You need to explain to Erwin what you did in extreme detail,” he didn’t bother grabbing her other wrist; she hadn’t started trying to wiggle her way out yet. “Because what you did to Petra’s mother…” he forced in a big breath of air. “I’ve never seen anyone else do, and I don’t know whether I should be amazed and in awe of you, or sh*tting my pants in fear of you.”

Chapter 8: 4. Interrogations and Fevers

Chapter Text

Erwin sat at his desk watching in blatant amusem*nt while Levi paced his room, running his hand through his hair every few seconds. Mike stood by the window, peering out of it quietly while Hange sat next to Faye, excitedly bouncing around and effectively pissing the doctor off with their unending energy. Faye rubbed her temples, snapping and frustratedly pointing at key points on numerous pieces of paper.

They had been at this the entire night, and she was exhausted.

“Erwin, I swear to the walls,” Faye seethed, “I’m going to kill someone— probably myself— if one of you doesn’t start understanding this sh*t.” He knew perfectly well what she was explaining, but Hange kept throwing out questions, twisting Faye’s head through a loop and testing her patience. “Look,” she held up a drawing of an anatomically accurate heart, “Your heart pumps blood through your body, bringing blood to and from your lungs.” She traced her finger over her chest. “When I started my compressions, Mrs. Ral’s heart had stopped. I don’t know how long she was dead for, but she was most definitely not breathing, and her heart was not beating.”

It was maddening. Faye’s eyes had started to go bloodshot, and all she wanted to do was take a nice, long nap on the couch in Erwin’s office.

“So when I started pushing down on her chest,” Faye clasped one hand over the other to mimic her compressions on Erwin’s desk. “I was mimicking the heart when it contracts, to try and keep the blood flowing through the body,” she said it all slowly, just f*cking waiting for Hange to jump in with another question, “And after 30 compressions—”

“But why thirty?” Hange asked, a pen and a sheet of paper at the ready.

“I don’t f*cking know!” Faye snarled. “That’s the way my dad taught me, and I’ve been doing that for the last 25 years.”

“So he started teaching you when you were an infant?” It was a genuine question. Faye knew Hange just wanted to be thorough, but she was ready to rip the pen out of Hange’s grip and stab herself with it.

“No,” Faye squeezed her eyes shut, and she buried her face in her hands. “I started learning when I was— I don’t know— maybe… Five?”

“But just to reiterate, you seriously don’t know why it’s specifically 30 pushes?”

“No Hange, I don’t. I didn’t think to ask that when I was learning. I was just following orders.” She could feel her eyes burning with tears.

All f*cking night she had been talking in circles.

“After 30 compressions, I tilted Mrs. Ral’s head back, breathed some air into her lungs twice, and then went back to the compressions.”

“And you did that twice?”

“Yes.”

“Is there a limit to how long someone can stay dead for before this method doesn’t work?”

“Four minutes.”

“Why four minutes?”

She heaved out a heavy sigh, not bothering to straighten her back out and look at the quizzical scientist.

“It’s called the Golden Four Minutes. If your brain doesn’t get any oxygen within four minutes, the cells start decomposing and breaking down which causes brain damage,” she explained. She felt a tear slide down her cheek, pooling in her palm, though Faye couldn’t discern whether it was from frustration or exhaustion. “And if you wait longer than 10 minutes, the patient goes brain dead, and there’s absolutely no coming back from that.”

“What’s the difference between brain damage and being brain dead?”

“I think brain damage—”

“You think?”

“I’m getting confused!” Faye snapped, “You keep throwing question after question at me, and some of them are making me seriously question everything I’ve learned. My mental state is crumbling like a pillar of salt. And sh*t, I’d do anything to just take a f*cking nap right now.”

Faye peeked out from behind her hands at Hange, who was grinning wildly at Faye.

“Why are you crying?” they asked, leaning forward in their chair, dropping the pen on Erwin’s desk, “Is it because you feel guilty about lying to us?” Hange had slammed her palms onto the arm rests of Faye’s chair, while Faye shrunk into the chair trying to maintain some sort of distance. “Or maybe you’re telling the truth. But then, where did you get all this information?” Hange brought their head down, leaning their forehead against Faye’s, and the latter screwed her eyes shut, trying desperately to take in some slow, deep breaths. “You said you learned from your father, but where did he learn?”

That was the question Faye had been dreading the most.

“I’d ask him, but he disappeared five years ago,” she retorted hotly.

“Hange, get off of her,” Levi ordered.

“I’ve done a lot of research on human anatomy to compare with titans, and in all the medical records I’ve gone through, I’ve never come across a method like the one you used,” Hange continued, breath fanning Faye’s nose.

“I told you that I don’t f*cking know!”

“Liar!” Hange rounded on Faye. Their fingers tangled into Faye’s hair at the scalp and yanked Faye’s head backwards while their other hand wrapped around her throat, one knee leaning over Faye’s thighs. “What are you so bent on keeping a secret?” Faye let out a strangled sound when Hange squeezed her throat. “You have five seconds to tell us, or your brother is going to be detained and tortured for information.”

Faye’s whole world was crashing. She couldn’t breathe, and vaguely, she could tell her chest was rising and falling rapidly, taking in short, shallow breaths. Hange’s face morphed into one of her old customers, and she flinched when his fingers dug into her neck, effectively cutting off her air flow while she flailed beneath him. She uselessly pawed at his hand, and he groaned, pushing his hips forward while she desperately tried to crawl away. He was laughing, watching her panic, and her eyes had started to droop while her movements became sluggish. He was going to kill her if she didn’t get away. He was going to torture her before killing her, and Eren would find her body dumped in a dirty alleyway, covered in sem*n and piss, and he’d forever remember his sister as a whor*—

Light blinded Faye’s eyes while she violently coughed. The air was getting caught in her throat, but that didn’t deter Faye from forcing down greedy gulps of oxygen. Someone was holding her. She couldn’t tell who, but they were warm, and they weren’t holding down her arms. Her eyes were unfocused, and she tried to squint to see who was slapping her cheek gently. It was a mess of black hair, and they cupped a hand somewhere near her temple.

Levi was trying to say something. By the way he tilted his head, Faye assumed it was a question, but the only thing she could really hear was the blood rushing in her ears and the ragged breaths she was forcing in. Her mouth tasted metallic and salty, and she frowned, trying to figure out where the blood had come from.

Another gentle slap. Levi was trying to get Faye’s attention, but she was too busy patting the ground beside her. Wasn’t she just sitting on a chair? How the f*ck had she managed to end up on the floor?

She brought a hand up; it was shaking and numb. She felt blindly around her face, and when she hit her nose, she groaned, reeling her hand backwards and swearing at the smeared blood on it.

Her ears had started to ring, and distantly, she could hear Hange shouting, and Levi’s lips moved again, and Faye could have sworn she could make out his swearing before he glanced over his shoulder then back at her.

It was like she was underwater, everything was distorted and flimsy.

“Man,” the words sounded gurgled and slurred, “What a way to start off our friendship.” She tried to stare at Levi, who slapped her cheek again, just slightly rougher.

Was she drunk?

Someone heaved Faye to her feet, looping their arms around her armpits, but her legs buckled, and they had to shift her. Levi had come around to her side, slinging an arm around her torso while the other person mirrored him on the other side, and they dragged her forward.

She had no clue where they were taking her, but it wasn’t home. Home was through the door behind her, but she was being hauled forward. When she tried to dig her heel into the floor, her foot uselessly flopped.

She tried to tell whoever was holding her that she wanted to go home, but the words caught in her throat, and she let out a choked gasp instead when the door flung open and she realised in horror that it was someone’s bedroom.

She tried to swing her hands down to claw at the arms holding her upright, but they stayed limp by her sides. She tried to ask them to let her go, that she had given up her job as a whor*, and that she regretted ever resorting to it. She had a tea shop now. She wasn’t an object that was up for sale anymore.

She felt a sob wrack through her body before she was gently laid down on the tiled floor. She tried to crawl away, shaking her head and explaining that she just wanted to go home. She wanted to see Alexander and ask him how his mother was doing—

And just like that, the world came rushing back to Faye the second the freezing water hit her. She sputtered for a moment, tensing before she let out a crazed laugh.

She hadn’t had a panic attack in the last seven years, but boy did this one ram into her.

“Would you stop slapping me like a piece of meat?” Faye’s head lulled to the side to fix Levi with a tired stare, and he furrowed his eyebrows.

“You look like sh*t,” Levi muttered, squinting at her.

“That’s not very nice to say to your friend,” Faye slurred.

“Mike, shut the water off. I think she’s fine now,” Levi drawled, offering a hand out to Faye, who gratefully took it, leaning against the wall to steady herself.

“Hey.” There was a sharp squeak of the metal nozzle turning before Mike reached a hand out, and Faye couldn’t help the subconscious flinch. He paid no mind to it and gently put his hand on the small of her back, guiding her out of the shower, “What happened?”

Levi’s hand left hers, and when she took the second step, her leg buckled, and she caught herself on the sink.

“I think I should be the one asking you that,” Faye dryly replied, clutching onto the cool glass to keep from falling.

“Hange took a swing at you,” Mike started, offering her a hand, which Faye stared at for a moment.

“I’m just going to chill here for a second,” Faye decided, leaning against the sink.

“Erwin pulled them off of you, and they’re probably getting the lecture of their life right now,” Mike dropped his hand, but continued explaining, “You were pretty out of it, and when Levi and I hauled you up to get you in here you just…” His lips pulled down into a guilty frown. “...Broke down.”l

“It’s not your fault,” Faye sent an apologetic smile up at Mike, but it looked wild and vicious with the blood smeared around her nose and lips, “I guess I had a panic attack, and I got sucked into my memories. It wasn’t something you guys had control over—”

“You kept telling us you weren’t an object anymore,” Levi spoke up. He had crossed his arms and leaned against the opposite wall, “And that you weren’t a whor* anymore.”

“I did tell you I was a prostitute for a couple of years,” Faye blandly pointed out.

“You neglected to mention how traumatised you were.”

“I told you I only had two options: move out or die,” Mike snapped his head to fix Faye with a stunned expression.

“I thought you were being metaphorical,” Levi scowled.

The door opened and in stepped Commander Erwin Smith, who ran a hand through his hair before he dipped his head in greeting, blissfully unaware of the trauma Faye just relived.

“You should get a change of clothes,” Erwin suggested, noting the puddle of water Faye was standing in and the soaking wet clothes she wore.

*

It was the seventh day The Tea House had been closed, and the customers were starting to get nervous. Erwin had started noticing that everytime he dropped by and tried to open the door, the same few people would casually be rounding the corner, watching intently as his hand turned the knob, and they would frown dejectedly when he jiggled the doorknob, meaning the shop was still closed.

Every day, Erwin had opted out of taking Levi or Mike with him to visit the illicit doctor, but on the seventh day, he’d had enough. When he found the front door still locked, he let out an annoyed sigh.

“I can probably squeeze through that window on the second floor,” Levi offered, his finger trailing upwards to point at the open window.

“That looks like a tight fit, even for you,” Mike countered bitterly, “I can smell her up there, but something is definitely off.” His eyes squinted while he flitted his eyes back and forth, trying to determine another entry point. And then his heart sank. “You don’t think the shop has been closed because she’s...sick, do you?”

Alexander stood a few paces behind the three. He had watched Erwin try the door to no avail, and he had almost retorted when Levi said he was going to try and shimmy through the window, but now that Mike had finally gotten his two cents in, Alexander took a deep breath of air and crossed his arms.

“She’s in bed with a fever,” he said curtly, and when the three soldiers turned to stare at him, he felt his mouth go dry.

“A fever?” Erwin repeated, “Shouldn’t she be able to handle something as minor as that?” A fever sounded mild in comparison to what he knew she was capable of. So why had she been stuck in bed for an entire week, recovering from a measly fever?

“It’s…” Alexander hesitated, not knowing how much information he should divulge, “It’s not pretty in there.” Maybe he shouldn’t have said anything, but now that all of them were patiently waiting for him to continue, he couldn’t exactly back out. “She’s really out of it, sweating and shivering, and I think she’s hallucinated a few times.”

“You think?” Levi cut in, “It’s either she did or she didn’t, so which is it?”

“It’s bad. That’s all I know for certain.” He wasn’t sure if he had actually seen her talking to the open air, and a part of him sincerely hoped he had been dreaming when it had happened. “I’m going in right now, if you guys want to see her,” Alexander offered hesitantly, not knowing what else to say.

So when the three men nodded, Alexander opened the door and stepped through, holding it open and locking it once all three had stepped inside. Mike grimaced. The air inside was stale, and if he wasn’t certain about Faye’s scent smelling like the plague earlier, he was definitely sure about it now.

Levi’s eyes roved the dining area which should have been otherwise spotless, but instead was covered in a thin layer of dust. He could physically see small dust particles floating languidly through the filtered sunlight in a small window. The shop didn’t even smell like tea anymore;instead, it left a bitter taste in his mouth.

Under normal circ*mstances, there would usually be a few candles littered around casting a soft glow over the wooden walls, and the lights would be dimmed to create a nice atmosphere, but the room looked grey and depressing without it’s usual customers. Like the hollowed out shell of what it used to be.

“She’s upstairs,” Alexander directed, “I’ll be up in a few minutes. I’m just going to make a pot of tea for her.” He had already taken a few long strides forward, disappearing behind the kitchen doors.

“This is eerie, right?” Mike murmured, trailing behind Erwin and Levi, who had started for the staircase. “It doesn’t even smell the same in here, and it’s only been a week...”

“Erwin, I’m bringing my squad in tomorrow to clean up.” It wasn’t a request. Levi continued grimly, “This place is filthy. I can’t imagine Faye enjoys living in a layer of dirt and grime.”

“Do what you want,” Erwin sighed, “But if she’s as sick as Mr. Ral says she is, don’t disturb her.”

Mike's stomach gave a lurch when Erwin twisted the doorknob to Faye’s bedroom, and he stepped inside with a grimace. The air downstairs might have been stale, but the air in Faye’s room was stifling and humid.

On the bed lay Faye, splayed out with several blankets on top of her while she muttered something in her sleep, twisting violently. Her hair had been pulled into a high bun, but the fly-aways clung to her forehead and cheeks under a sheen of sweat. Her skin was pale and her lips chapped, while her eyebrows were drawn together, creasing her forehead.

Erwin kneeled beside her bed, gently brushing the stray hair away from her forehead, while his lips pulled into a thin line. “She’s burning up,” he murmured, while Faye dug her head into her pillow.

“Should we wake her up?” Mike anxiously inquired, moving to stand near the open window, which was the only source of fresh air, “Or maybe take her to the hospital?”

“Let me check her forehead,” Levi ordered, waiting for Erwin to shift to the side. Levi bent his head down, pressing his cheek against her sweaty forehead and he couldn’t help the furious scowl. He had dealt with his fair share growing up in the underground and had to take care of ill people a number of times (his mother, when he was still a child, and Isabel, the few times she had gotten sick), but this seemed graver.

She was sweltering hot.

Faye tossed in her sleep, muttering out something unintelligible, but she sounded distressed.

Levi spun on his heel, kneeling down in front of her desk and rummaging through the drawers. She had suture kits, disinfectant, homemade salves and ointments, and a wide variety of pills for any and all occasions. Hell, she even had opioids, for f*ck’s sake. So there was no way she wouldn’t have something for a sh*tty fever.

The only problem was that the labels on all of her jars and containers were in medical gibberish, and none of it meant anything to Levi.

She was sweating like a pig, and that meant she was probably thirsty. “Wake her up and get her some water,” Levi growled, “Mike, go see what's taking Petra’s brother so long; see if he’s taking a sh*t or something.” And when neither of the men moved, something inside of Levi snapped. “Did I stutter? Move your asses!”

Levi’s outburst seemed to work, and Mike hurried through the door and down the stairs while Erwin followed to get a cup of water. His eyes flitted over the bottles of pills: Pseudoephedrine Hydrochloride, Amoxicillin, Adderall, Caffeine, Acetaminophen, Alprazolam, Ibuprofen. None of it made any sense to Levi; he might as well be reading words a child made up.

Erwin was quick to make his way back up, setting the cup on the nightstand and gently shaking Faye’s shoulder, but she turned again, shaking his hand off and shivering at the cool air that brushed against her bare skin.

“Faye,” Erwin tried again, watching her eyes blink open for a second before they fluttered shut again, “You’re sick, you need to wake up, come on.” He shook her shoulder again, and when she strained her eyes to keep them open, he furrowed his brows.

“Zeke?” It was just above a whisper, and she reached a shaky hand out, patting his hair down. “I’m so- sorry—” Her teeth were chattering, and she was struggling to get the words out in one breath. “Don’t b-b-be mad at d-d-dad.”

“It’s Erwin,” he corrected, tucking Faye’s hand back into the blanket and helping her sit up, “Do you think you can drink some water?” She was wearing a tank top, but from the looks of it, she was drenched in her own sweat.

“Erwin?” It came out stuttered through her vibrating teeth, and she had to squint to try and see him properly. “But then—”

“Faye, the water?” Erwin repeated, holding the cup up to her lips, patiently letting her take a few greedy sips.

“That's it,” Levi snapped, pushing himself away from the medication, “We’re taking this woman to the hospital.”

“This doctor is a hospital,” Alexander corrected from the doorway, holding a small tray, “I don’t know what happened, but a day after you took her to be questioned, she turned back up at my house at six in the morning, shivering and soaked to the bone.” He watched the short soldier freeze up from his spot on the floor amidst all the medication.

He shouldn’t have let her leave. He should have insisted she change into something dry, or at least have given her a coat or a jacket, or arranged for a carriage to pick her up and take her home. He shouldn’t have let her walk out of HQ into a storm.

“Erwin,” Faye’s voice was still hoarse, and she tried to tug on the man’s jacket, “Why is it so cold?” She sounded like a five year old, and her unsteady breathing made Erwin’s insides twist painfully.

“You’re sick,” he replied, watching Alexander yell at Levi.

“You’re warm.” The words were slurred together, and she leaned into the furnace of a man, stealing his body heat.

“Stop bickering,” Erwin barked at Alexander and Levi while he bundled Faye into more blankets, letting her lean on his shoulder. “It’s been a week. Alexander, I’m not questioning your ability to care for Faye, but she needs to see professional help. She’s burning up, and at this rate, she’ll die.” His words were harsh, and he tried to reel himself back when he noticed Alexander’s hands start to shake while he hung his head.

“I’ve tried everything,” Alexander muttered. “I gave her ibuprofen and made her drink water. Her fever hasn’t gone down at all.” He grit his teeth, berating himself, “She kept telling me to just let her sweat it out, but nothing was working...”

Ibuprofen.

Levi snatched the bottle, yanking the cap off and shoving it in Erwin's direction.

“Give her two of these.” His eyes shifted to scrutinise the young man standing in the doorway. “You, get some ginger and soda crackers, and tell Mike to get more blankets.”

“All due respect, Captain,” Al snarkily started, “I don’t think you’re qualified to give medical advice like this.”

“f*ck off,” Levi licked his lips in irritation, “If this doesn’t improve her situation in the next five hours, we’ll take her to a hospital.” He squared his shoulders back. “If Faye said she wants to sweat it out, then we’ll let her.” His eyes slid over Erwin who was keeping the blankets wrapped around Faye. “Commander, you need to take your shirt off and get into bed with her.”

“Pardon?” Erwin’s brows raised in surprise.

“You’re a living furnace,” Levi explained, “You and Mike are climbing into bed with her, and you’re going to let her share your body heat.”

“And you?”

“This whole building is filthy. I’m going to clean it all.” His lips curled back in disgust. ”And you.” He turned back to Alex. “After you get the ginger and soda crackers, you should go check on your mom.” He tried to sound a little less abrasive before he stormed off down the stairs, leaving Erwin and Alexander to stare at each other in a somewhat baffled way.

“You heard the Captain,” Erwin sighed, prompting Alexander to trail down after Levi while he tried to lay Faye down on the bed. When Mike finally returned up the stairs, he raised an eyebrow at Erwin, who laid near the wall with Faye snuggled into his shoulder.

“I thought Levi was joking...”

“When was the last time you heard Levi joke about getting half-naked?” Erwin dryly responded. Mike said nothing, but he peeled off his shirt and got onto the small, twin sized mattress.

They weren’t sure how long they stayed like that, but Faye had stopped tossing and turning, seemingly at ease being sandwiched between the two heat sources. Alexander had stopped in with a tray of ginger slices and soda crackers, and he later brought a pitcher of water that Mike made sure to have Faye drink from every so often.

*

The first thing Faye noticed when she woke up and formed a proper, lucid thought, was that her entire torso was drenched in sweat, and she couldn’t understand why. Her head throbbed and, for a moment, she genuinely wondered if she had too much to drink the night before. But then she went to swing her legs off the bed, but instead found they were tangled up wotj someone else's legs, and she was curled into someone’s chest, snoozing the night away.

Two men.

Faye Jaeger had two men in her bed.

She peeled off the blankets and carefully crawled out of the bed, careful not to disturb whoever it was that had taken up residence in her tiny bed.

She then calmly collected a shirt and some sweat pants, and changed into them, cringing at the soaked shirt she had worn to bed.

As much as she tried to stretch her mind out and try to recall past events, the last thing she could clearly recall was leaving Ehrmich and making her way back to Trost, but even that seemed fuzzy.

There were holes in her memory, and when she padded downstairs intending to make herself some tea, she froze.

Because there, at the counter, was Captain Levi, grouchily jotting down an order from a customer, and beside him sat Alexander, tallying the money up. What in the world had Faye missed out on last night?

Levi nudged Alexander, jutting his chin in Faye’s direction, catching eye contact with her for a moment, and her stomach lurched. Alexander shot up from his seat, guiding Faye over to the till to make her take a seat while Levi poured her a cup of tea.

“Sorry, I’m a little lost. Since when did you retire to take over my tea shop?” Faye asked quizzically, taking a sip of tea.

“Someone had to nurse your dumbass back to health,” Levi tsked, but when Faye stared up at him, patiently waiting for him to continue, he scoffed, “You’ve been in bed with a fever for the last week and a half.”

“No, seriously. How much did I have to drink last night?” Faye questioned. “I woke up with two guys in my bed. Why would you let me take them home?”

“Why don’t you go wake them up?” Alexander challenged. “I know I was teasing you about having a threesome with Erwin and Mike, but I didn’t actually think you’d sleep with them before I got the chance to— ouch! Captain, what the hell?” He whined, clutching his head where Levi’s fist had struck him.

“He’s screwing with you,” Levi deadpanned, “Erwin, Mike, and Alexander all took turns sleeping in your bed to generate more heat so you could sweat your fever out.”

“Why would you go through the trouble?” Faye’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“Why did you pick Mike off the street?” Levi countered, “Because you saw someone in need of help.” He had answered his own question, and after a second, his eyes glanced over to the clock on the wall over the door, and he stretched. “We need to start packing up. We have an expedition coming up tomorrow and Erwin needs to get a decent night's worth of sleep, or he’ll be constipated the whole day.”

He had already started making his way around the counter, and Faye watched him tiredly make his way up the stairs.

“What happened while I was out?”

“Oh, the usual,” Alexander shrugged, picking at some dirt under his nail. “I tried and pitifully failed to keep your fever under control, and then Commander Erwin showed up with Captain Levi and Mike, and all hell broke loose.” He refused to glance up at Faye, keeping his eyes trained on his fingers. “Nurse Levi decided to make you sweat it all out, and some dishes were broken—”

“Levi broke my dishes?” Faye incredulously asked, and a split second later, Alexander barked out a laugh.

“Don’t be stupid. I did. I actually threw them at his head and the f*cker dodged them all like some kind of sexy—”

“Get to the point.”

“Excuse me for wanting to express my feelings,” Alexander mocked. “Anyways, lots of words were exchanged — mostly mine— and then he threatened to bring Petra with him tomorrow, and I caved,” he shamelessly admitted, “As angry as I am with him, I’m furious with Petra, and I’d like to avoid her for as long as possible.”

“So what’s the date today?” Faye asked.

“Well you’ve only been talking about tomorrow for the last month and a half,” Alexander snorted.

“What?” Faye snapped, “Eren’s graduating tomorrow? sh*t!” She swore. “sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t!” She raked a hand through her hair, headache forgotten. “I need to go get that stupid journal and sudoku book—”

“I already took care of it,” Alexander admitted, “It’s all wrapped including one of your dad’s old shirts and his ring.”

“Alexander, I could kiss you right now if you weren’t a raging hom*osexual.”

“Thank me by checking in on my mom,” Alexander dryly replied, “She looks like she’s okay, but it would make me feel better if you at least checked on her tomorrow.”

Erwin strolled down the stairs with Mike and Levi in tow, looking stoic as ever. He sent down a polite smile when he neared the register.

“I’m glad to see you’re awake and conscious,” It wasn’t condescending, but something in his tone made Faye’s lips tug down, “We’ll be heading off on our expedition tomorrow. Will you be seeing us off?”

Faye teetered for a moment, before hesitantly nodding, “Yeah, I’ll pack my emergency medical bag and hand it off to you tomorrow.”

“Make sure you label things in a language we can actually understand,” Levi piped in, “I was trying to find some kind of drug to give you but they were all chicken scratch to me.”

“I’ll try and be more concise,” Faye promised, but then she shifted uncomfortably, “Hey, do you still have my mom’s ring?”

Of course, he did. He had been thumbing it for the last three days in his pocket, tracing the curvature and engravings.

“Here,” he grunted, gently placing it down on the counter, frowning when he realised how empty his pocket felt without the small weight in it.

“Until tomorrow then,” Faye gave a mock salute, and Erwin dipped his head, nodding before he stalked off.

“Faye,” Alexander nibbled his cheek, watching the soldiers’ backs as they pushed past the door. “Captain Levi doesn’t sleep an awful lot,” he said,slowly and unsurely. “I was just thinking,” he pursed his lips, “Do you think his fallen comrades haunt his thoughts at night, and that’s why he has trouble falling asleep?” He casted his eyes downward, lost in his thoughts.

“Are you worried Petra is going to join them soon?” Faye questioned, leaning a hand on his shoulder.

“Well, I just—” He chewed his bottom lip anxiously. “She keeps sending letters home about how great her squad is with Captain Levi, but the mortality rate keeps increasing," he explained, watching his boss lean on the counter, mulling over his words.

"If she does, at least you know she passed away doing something she enjoyed and believed in," Faye assured, sending him a small smile.

"I just feel like she's throwing her life away," Alexander admitted.

"I like to think that their deaths mean something." Faye started slowly, Eren coming to mind, "They're learning more and more about titans everyday, even if it's only little bits and pieces. You have to start somewhere, right?"

Alexander nodded numbly, “Eren is going to graduate and join soon.” The words didn’t feel like his own, and they reverberated inside of Faye’s head. “Do you think his death will mean something?”

“I think he’ll die fighting for freedom, or live long enough to see his dreams come to fruition. In one way or another, his death will have meant something,” she reluctantly forced a breath into her lungs. “The world might not know his name, but I’ll remember it, and I’ll carry it with me wherever I go.”

“But what if that isn’t good enough?” His face contorted into a pained expression, and Faye watched him try to imagine a world in which Petra was dead, and he became an only child. “What if—” He couldn’t even get the words out, and he hung his head in shame.

“What if she loves you just as much as you do her?” Faye asked, “Have you ever considered you two fight and clash so much because you’re scared for each other?” It was a wise question, and after a second of rubbing Alexander’s back, she left him to mull it over, refilling her customer’s cups and making small talk.

It was bizarre to think ten years had already passed since the scrawny, red-headed ten-year-old slammed open Faye’s door and demanded a job. He had refused to talk about himself for a long time. When he finally broke down about how his sister had joined the corps, and he didn’t know how to handle the fear of her death, he had started seeing Faye differently. She wasn’t just his boss, and the person who gave him money at the end of the day. She had morphed into a crutch for him to lean on, and inadvertently had become his role model.

She didn’t try to replace Petra, but she listened when he asked, and despite his childish fear and antics, never lost her temper with him (except the one time he had accidentally created a bomb with Eren, Armin and Mikasa). Alexander found solace in having someone who could understand where he was coming from.

She wasn’t his family by blood, but even if he lost everyone else, he would be fine so long as he had her.

Chapter 9: 5. The Fall of Trost

Chapter Text

The air was unusually crisp while the early morning sun beat down on the dilapidated wooden sign which read ‘The Tea House’ in central Trost. Faye’s shop was decorated by balloons and banners of all sorts, and the entire building smelled of sweet bread and cinnamon in preparation for Eren, Mikasa, and Armin’s graduation party. Her medical supplies had all been stashed away, deep in the cellar. She couldn’t afford to take chances with a bunch of teenagers coming to party, especially not when they were all entering the military.

Faye had thus taken the liberty of digging a four-foot-deep hole and stashing away all of her medical-grade supplies beneath the damp dirt. It would only be there for the day, and the soil was relatively soft, so she shouldn’t have a tough time digging it all back up the next morning.

The short brunette tucked her key into her pocket after she locked her door, and she set off down the street to see the Survey Corps off before they left. Despite the relatively early hour, the hustle and bustle of the Trost District had already started, and merchants piled into their stores to begin a long, arduous day, while children excitedly played on the street, sending laughter to echo down the cobblestone pathways.

Of course, the brunette stepped into the brothel, smiling at the guard when he tipped his head in greeting. Not much had changed in the establishment. Same humid air that smelt of sex and alcohol, though there were considerably less patrons so early in the day. Faye sat down at the bar, grinning up at the thirty-year-old brothel manager.

“What’s got you so happy today?” Bertha grumbled, polishing off a wine glass, “It’s not your birthday, and the holidays haven’t started yet,” She squinted long and hard trying to discern the twenty-five-year-old’s behaviour. “Did you finally find a rich man to marry?”

“No lavish gifts for me,” Faye licked her lips, an ironic smile curved on her lips, “My brother is graduating today, and I’m just excited to finally see him. It’s been like four months now.”

“Is he old enough to buy one of our girls yet?” Bertha questioned, pouring Faye a shot of hard liquor.

“He’s fifteen, Bertha,” Faye rolled her eyes.

“I’ll get him in five years,” the manager shrugged, nudging the drink over and pouring her own, “Just you wait. We’ll give him the sex of his life—”

“Let’s not talk about my baby brother’s sex life,” Faye grimaced, “That’s making me a little nauseous, and I still have a few deliveries to make.” She mirrored Bertha, raising the shot, clinking the glass and knocking it back, letting out a hiss when the alcohol burned down her throat. “What’d you pour me?” She coughed, “That’s not vodka, is it?” If it was, it shouldn’t have been so strong.

“Moonshine,” Bertha gave a smug smirk. “Anyways, do you have the goods?” She was always right down to business with Faye.

“Let me see here,” Faye rummaged around in her smaller medical bag, bringing out the jars and setting them down on the bar haphazardly, “Birth control, muscle relaxant, and I tossed in some tea too—”

“Faye,” Bertha snapped, “Stop giving us free tea.” Despite reprimanding the younger woman, she cracked the tin open to smell it, but she frowned when the paper bills spilled out. “What the hell is this? Why are you giving me my forty dollars back?”

“Because I’m not a charity case,” Faye countered, “The tea helps put you to sleep; it’s chamomile with valerian root and lavender.”

“You’ll run out of ressources if you go around giving freebies like this,” Bertha crossed her arms, leaning over the counter and sliding an envelope over.

“It’s only for you and the Scouting Regiment,” Faye reasoned, teetering on her stool while she shoved the money into her bag.

“Maybe I should have given you that room when you asked for it,” the bartender was starting to rethink her decision from when Faye had Erwin Smith and his dogs tailing her, and Faye pursed her lips, shaking her head.

“I would have been sniffed out either way.” Literally. Mike Zacharias had the nose of a hound.

“But still, it’s concerning that Commander Erwin Smith has taken a shine to you...” she trailed off, eyes flitting around the room to make sure no one was listening before she leaned in, voice just above a whisper, “He’s very… manipulative and persistent, Faye. Promise me you’ll be careful.”

“Cross my heart and hope to die,” Faye grinned, “Anyways, I’ve still got a few deliveries to run today, and I wanted to catch Erwin before he left, so I need to run.” Bertha watched Faye hop off the chair, dusting off her pants. “I’ll see you next month.” She sent up a wave before she carried on her way out the doors and back down the street.

The crowds had already started gathering around Main Street, which led directly out of Trost, eager to count the number of soldiers they started with and compare when they returned.

“They’re stealing our taxes,” she heard a man beside her grumble to his wife. “And for what? To fund their suicide missions?”

“Bleeding our pockets dry,” the woman hissed back, “I don’t understand why they don’t just disband them already, it’s a waste of our money.”

“I heard Humanity’s Strongest was working in a tea shop a couple days ago,” Faye’s cheeks burned, and she glared down at the ground, “No doubt looking for candidates to feed to the titans and conduct experiments on.”

“Different Corps member,” Faye muttered.

“Pardon?” the husband sent a pointed glare down at Faye, no doubt sizing her up. For a moment, she considered waving the man off and letting him continue on in ignorance, but then his eyes lit up in recognition and he licked his lips, bringing his wife’s attention to Faye. “That’s the manager of the tea shop we were just speaking about, dear.”

“Oh?” his wife let her eyes scan Faye up and down, frowning, “She certainly looks like a spinster: no dress, no nice shoes, and—” Her eyes caught on the silver around Faye’s neck, and she squinted, peering down to get a better look. “Henry, look at that,” she let out a laugh, “This woman is wearing their emblem like a collar.”

“How much do you wager she’s sleeping with one of them?” Henry barked out a laugh.

“None. I saved their asses a few—” ‘None, I saved their asses a few weeks back and now they won’t leave me alone.’ Is what Faye wanted to say, but the woman tutted, shaking her head.

“A lady shouldn’t use that sort of language,” she reprimanded, “Though to be fair, you certainly don’t look like much of a lady.” She passed another judgemental gaze over Faye’s appearance again.

Faye bit her tongue to keep from screaming out obscenities, instead choosing to face the street again, finally hearing the familiar sound of horses pushing forward on the cobblestone.

Erwin rode at the front, his shoulders back and his head held high, seemingly oblivious to the belligerent whispers from the crowd. Mike rode just behind him, cooly staring forwards with his team filing one by one after him, and Levi and Hange seemed to be arguing with each other about something or other.

When Faye stepped forward, jogging to catch up to Erwin’s horse, she felt the stares of the crowd bore into her, picking her apart, from her pants and shirt to the messy low bun she wore. It made no difference to Faye though; their opinions were their problem, not hers.

“Faye,” Erwin dipped his chin in acknowledgment, slowing his horse to come to a stop.

“Hey,” she greeted, swinging the large duffel bag off her shoulder, “I relabelled everything and wrote down instructions on what to use each for, so hopefully you guys can make use of it all.” She held the strap out to Erwin, and his hand brushed hers when he grasped onto it with a thankful smile. “You guys should have just about everything you should need: headache pills, suture kits, a lighter, pain killers, salves, ointments, creams,” she listed off, “Opioids—”

Erwin choked on the air for a second, sending down a half impressed, half incredulous look. “Opioids?” he repeated. “I wasn’t even aware you had any.”

“Yeah, I put some morphine and codeine in there, so have at them. I have some more back at the shop, I was going to try and replicate them, but I’m not great with all the chemical breakdowns.”

“I’ll ask Hange to take a look.” He wasn’t offering, he was stating, and Faye had to remind herself that it came from a place of kindness, not condescension. His eyes caught onto the silver around her neck and he nodded to himself approvingly, “Is there anything else you’d like to say before we head off?”

“Yeah,” Faye’s tone turned serious, “Don’t f*cking die.” She could hear murmurs going through the crowd, all wondering what she could possibly be giving to the Commander and why the conversation was dragging out so long. “Also, don’t overdose on any of that medication. It’s one to two pills— maybe three if they’re on the heavier side. And it’s one tablespoon to two tablespoons of the drinkable meds. And make sure you bring back my bag. That thing was expensive, and I’d—”

“Are you done babbling?” Levi cut in, his horse trotting to stand beside Erwin.

“And you,” Faye grinned, thumbing the metal in her pocket, “Here.” She held out her hand, dropping the ring into Levi’s open palm, “Don’t lose that. It’s to make sure you come back safely. All of you.”

Levi stared at the golden ring sitting in his palm. The same one he had been thumbing a day before inside his pocket while he waited for Faye to wake up again. The same one she’d dumped into his hand, calling it her leash and collar, though now it seemed more inclusive, like the line went both ways instead of just one.

He couldn’t really find something to say in response, and instead he gave a curt nod, guiding his horse to stand back by his squad.

“No, but seriously Erwin,” Faye continued, “Bring everyone back safely. If not for your sake, then for mine. I just had to swallow my pride when a woman insulted both the corps and I, so don’t put my honour on the line if you can help it.”

“I’ll do my best,” Erwin pleasantly promised, “As always, I hope you’ll reconsider my proposition—”

“Don’t push your luck,” Faye dryly interrupted, an ironic smile on her lips, “Leave this on a good note, and I’ll take a week to genuinely think about your offer.”

“As always, lovely to see you,” he chuckled, “Send my regards to Alexander.” His leg pressed against the horse, willing it to start moving again, and Faye sent up a wave, stepping back into the crowd to watch them all carry on, green capes fluttering in a gentle gust of wind.

She watched them all canter, and her eyes locked with Petra’s warm ones. Faye sent up a small smile and a wave, and Petra gave a small nod, her fingers twitching up from the reins to return the gesture. That seemed like an improvement, in Faye’s opinion.

She had known Mike for a month and a half, and as she watched him follow Erwin through the gate, her jaw slackened and she let out a strangled gasp.

Somehow, in all the chaos Mike, Levi and Erwin had brought, she had found herself actually caring about their well-being.

She didn’t even relabel everything when Alexander asked her three years ago. But the moment Levi told her he had no clue what Acetaminophen was, she curated a medical bag for use, t with clear instructions for everything she had packed.

And when Mike gave her that pointed look in her kitchen when they had presented her with the necklace, she couldn’t reject it like she would have with any other person. Instead, she even found herself wearing it everyday.

And Erwin. She was still trying to wrap her head around the persistent commander, but everytime he opened his mouth, she found herself listening with rapt attention like a dog waiting for a command.

She wasn’t sure when it happened. Maybe it was the first day she picked Mike off the street and patched him up. Or maybe it was the day Levi apologised. Hell, it honestly could have been when Erwin continuously visited her to insist she join the scouts. Maybe it was when she woke up after her fever to find herself sandwiched between Mike and Erwin, with Levi busy manning the store below. Whenever it may have happened, Faye hadn’t even realised it. Now that she was standing on the sidelines, watching them all depart into the unknown, her stomach shifted uncomfortably.

She was in too deep now to not give a sh*t.

She stalked off down the road, trying to focus on making her deliveries. There was no use crying over spilt milk. Especially not when the milk came in the form of three relatively well known and respected men who were on their way into titan territory with no active medic.

The words reverberated in Faye’s head.

No active medic...

*

Alexander’s house was big, and everytime Faye visited, she always found herself staring up at the high ceiling and yellowing wallpaper. It probably paled in comparison to the lavish houses Faye imagined were in Mitras, but it was definitely on the upper class side for the citizens in Trost.

It wasn’t that Alexander’s family was rich. His father worked as a merchant, and he travelled quite a bit between the walls, moving from consumer to consumer on the hunt for a good deal or trade. Mr. Ral easily worked the hardest out of the family, and his work constantly had him out of the house, which, unfortunately, often left Alexander and Mrs. Ral alone.

“So where is Mr. Ral today?” Faye inquired, stepping into the home.

“Yalkell,” the ginger replied, eyes trailing out the door and up at the sunny afternoon sky.

“That’s pretty far,” Faye ventured, “Is it a day trip?”

“It’s supposed to be three days before he gets back. He said something about stopping in Ehrmich to trade some jewellery,” Alexander shrugged, “I’ll bet you a whole month’s worth of money he’ll visit Petra—”

“Just left on an expedition,” Faye bluntly informed him, “So he’s sh*t out of luck.” Alexander hummed, and when he turned to start leading Faye up the stairs, she raised an eyebrow and grabbed onto his hand, pulling him back. “You’re not acting like yourself. Are we going to talk about this, or is it something you need to deal with on your own?” She was straightforward about it, and her words had Alexander slumping his shoulders.

“Petra wrote home about you and your involvement in the Scouting Regiment,” he let it all out in one breath, and he fisted his hands so hard his knuckles turned white. “My dad thinks you’re a whor*, Faye,” Alexander’s teeth gritted together, and he scowled so deeply Faye thought his face would remain that way permanently, “And he thinks you’re getting in the way of Petra and Levi’s engagement—”

The air seemed to get sucked out of the room, and Faye tilted her head, trying not to look like the news had winded her.

“They’re in a relationship?” the brunette questioned, forcing her voice not to come out as small as she felt, “Why didn’t he tell me?”

“It’s all some kind of delusion,” And again, Faye found herself so out of the loop, she couldn’t even see it, “I asked him about it while you were out with a fever, and he said he never proposed. He didn’t even know Petra had a thing for him.”

“Oh,” Faye winced, “That’s got to be hard for Petra.”

“Serves her right,” He wore a hard look, one that Faye rarely ever saw so blatant in his eyes. “And my mom… She doesn’t know what to think…” Yeah, Faye could imagine Mrs. Ral trying to discern whether Petra was being truthful, or if she didn’t know Faye as well as she thought she did. “It doesn’t help she’s been struggling to get in a whole breath. But every time she’s lucid enough to actually think, all she can ask me about is about you and whether or not you’re romantically involved with Captain Levi… or Mike or Commander Erwin. I keep telling her that it’s not even a possibility but—”

He was rambling, his entire thought process unfurling.

“Why does it bother you so much?”

It was a simple question, but it made Alexander’s breath hitch and his spine stiffen, and he looked at Faye with such a heartbroken expression, like the world around him was slowly shattering into a million pieces.

“Why doesn’t it bother you?” he countered, running a hand through his hair, “Your image is being dragged through the mud.” His voice was steadily rising, and his breaths were coming out short and uneven. “And Petra is making my mom and dad question your character and morals, and they’ve known you for ten whole f*cking years,” he seethed.

“You’re like a daughter to them, you saved them from poverty, Faye. You gave them everything you could, and you almost killed yourself in the process—” He stopped mid sentence, and he bit his lip, wondering if he’d finally gone too far, “I just… It’s our fault you started selling drugs and poisons, and now you have all this blood on your hands, and it’s my fault. It’s all my fault, Faye.” The hard look in his eyes dulled and was replaced with complete and utter vulnerability and guilt. “And I hate that Petra is twisting their view of you just because her captain visits you and sees you as a friend.”

“Al, you need to remember that I’ve only known them for ten years,” Faye softly pointed out. “They’ve known Petra for twenty seven—”

“She abandoned them,” Alexander snapped, “She abandoned them to throw her whole life into a titan’s jaw, and they sit there and glorify her for it.” He was angry. But anger was never a primary emotion, and Faye tilted her head, trying to figure out where the anger had rooted from. “But you—” His voice cracked, and he squeezed his eyes shut, “You’ve put your whole life on the line for them… for me, and it’s like they’re willing to forget it all—”

“Alexander, they never even knew about half the things I did,” Faye reminded him, “Sure, they know I have a little bit of experience in treating people from time to time thanks to my father, but they don’t even know about the deliveries, or the entire room of plants upstairs, let alone that I started dealing out drugs and poison—”

“But they should…” he pressed, his lips tugged down in anguish, “You deserve the recognition for saving our f*cking lives over and over and over again. You’ve killed for us, and I know that’s not something you’ll ever recover from—”

“And I’d do it again in a heartbeat,” Faye interrupted, “Stop feeling guilty. It was my decision to hire you that started this whole mess. So if you want to blame someone, you can point your finger at me.”

“You have enough fingers being pointed at you!” Alexander exclaimed, “Don’t you get that? My father called you a whor* earlier, a slu*t who was looking to wreck relationships and steal money. And he knew…He knew you worked as a prostitute, and he knew how badly that screwed with your head.”

“Maybe some things never change,” Faye passively offered, “Maybe I really am a whor*. If enough people think so, why can’t I be?”

“Because you’re not.” Alexander had stomped forward, leaving his hands around her shoulders to shake, as if that would better get his point across, “In all ten years I’ve known you, you’ve never so much as kissed anyone. Not a man, not a woman. No one. And as much of a raging hom*osexual I am, I love you.”

Ah. His anger stemmed from respect and loyalty to Faye.

“I might not be able to love you the same way any other man could, but goddamn it, you’re my best friend. I’ve watched you for ten whole years, and I know you like the back of my hand. You deserve some sort of compensation, and Petra has screwed the closest thing you have to a set of parents.”

“Did you ever stop to wonder if she felt jealous?” Faye inquired, feeling Alexander’s fingers tighten around her shoulders, “That she saw me as a threat who was stealing her baby brother and parents away? Or that her family was replacing her with me?”

“Well, no but—”

“I think that the next time Levi comes around, you should ask him to bring Petra, and you should ask her about it all.” She left no room for reasoning, and she shrugged his hands off, starting for the staircase.

“That’s a terrible idea,” Alexander hollered, but Faye didn’t bother stopping.

“Tell me that after you talk to her, you coward.”

She made it up the steps and onto the second floor, starting off for the room down the corridor.

“Hello Mrs. Ral,” Faye politely greeted when she stepped into her woman’s bedroom, “I’m just going to check on your ankle and lungs, if that’s alright.” Faye would have been lying if she said it didn’t hurt when Mrs. Ral’s eyes snapped up to her and started evaluating her as though she were an alien lifeform.

“If it’ll ease Alexander’s nerves,” she grumbled, allowing Faye to peel back the covers and start to gently prod at the skin.

Her ankle was bruised, but otherwise, it didn’t look too bad. No bones seemed out of place, though the tendons and muscles under the skin were likely tender.

“Can you walk on your ankle?” Faye asked, gently pressing down to see how taut the tendons were.

“A little, but I’m old and slow.”

“Save that mentality for thirty years in the future,” Faye quipped, pulling out some gauze and wrapping it around Mrs. Ral’s ankle to give more support.

“You know,” the woman started hesitantly, “I’ve always thought you and Alexander would make marvellous children.” She tucked a piece of copper hair behind her ear, trying to gaugeFaye’s reaction. “If he proposed, would you accept?”

There it was. The woman’s incessant curiosity and concern.

“I think he could find someone a little more suited for him than me,” Faye replied dryly. ‘Like that Garrison soldier that always comes around the tea shop.’ she added in her head.

“Are you saying that because you already have your eye on someone else?” Mrs Ral tried to innocently ask, clasping her hands over her lap while Faye finished tying a neat knot on the gauze.

“I’m saying that because I’m not interested in getting married or being courted,” Faye countered, moving up the bed and rummaging around inside her bag, “I have my own source of income, and I enjoy living alone. Why would I want a husband to disrupt the life I’ve built for myself?”

She pulled out a stethoscope and began to examine Mrs. Ral’s chest.

“Are you implying you have a bed warmer?” Mrs. Ral questioned pointedly.

“Take a few deep breaths, I need to hear your lungs,” Faye ordered, “I’m saying that I’m not interested in a relationship, romantic or otherwise. Not even for money or status.” She pursed her lips and let the stethoscope fall, straightening her back. “You should ask Alexander to change out your gauze for more support,” Faye directed, “And you need to start taking some deeper breaths. Right now they’re too shallow and your lungs will start filling with fluid—”

“It hurts when I breathe in too much,” Mrs. Ral snapped.

“It’ll hurt more if you don’t,” Faye warned, removing the stethoscope from her neck while Mrs. Ral watched the woman with brutal sharpness. As her gaze trailed down to stare at the stethoscope, they caught on the metal resting over Faye’s shirt, and she screeched.

“You whor*! My husband was right all along,” her fingers curled around Faye’s wrist, pulling her in with blinding speed and tightly gripping the small locket around the doctor’s neck. “I knew you were a homewrecker,” she hissed, as though the pendant had confirmed her worst fears, “Petra is fighting for her life and love everyday, and the moment you meet her captain, you snatch him from her.”

“It was a gift,” Faye gritted out, prying Mrs. Ral’s fingers from her necklace, “For saving Mike and Levi’s life.”

“That’s Captain Levi to you, whor*,” Mrs. Ral spat, “You should show some respect to Humanity’s Strongest, or do you think that just because you’re f*cking him, it gives you the right to treat him as an equal?”

“I’m not sleeping with him,” Faye insisted, moving to put some space between her and the furious woman on the bed, “I’m not interested in him at all. He comes by for tea and medical supplies, that’s it.”

“And I suppose that’s why he had your little ring?” Mrs. Ral snapped, watching Faye freeze up at the mention of her mother’s ring.

“I got into trouble and he wanted a failsafe to make sure I didn’t run the second he let me out of his sight,” Faye tried to explain, but Mrs. Ral shot a finger up in disbelief.

“That’s bullsh*t and you know it. He and Petra have been on the same team for years, and within the last month, everything has come crashing down on their relationship, and it’s your fault—”

“Mom,” Alexander cut in from the doorway. “Stop it. Faye wouldn’t do something like that.”

“Oh? And how would you know? She’s had her eye on Captain Levi since the second he walked into her dingy tea shop—”

“Our dingy tea shop,” Alexander corrected, “And I’ve flirted more with the Captain than Faye ha—”

The ground shook below them, and Faye found herself pawing at the wall to keep herself upright. Crashes sounded out around them, while people outside screamed. Another booming crash shook the ground, and Faye finally sprung into action, remembering that screaming and earthquakes were generally a bad sign.

“Al, get your mom out of bed. I’m going to go check on those crashes.” She’d already started for the door, “And make it snappy.” She rushed down the stairs, taking them two at a time and wrenched open the door.

Angry smoke billowed out from several houses in the distance, while the citizens of Trost ran for their lives, all heading towards the direction of the inner gate. Chunks of the wall were lodged atop houses and businesses, and several paces to the left of Faye lay an older man’s head staring up at her, unblinking from beneath the rubble that had crushed his entire body.

It took her a second to peel her eyes from the man’s lifeless ones, and they trailed up the wall where an enormous head peeked over the wall, covered in exposed muscles and tendons while smoke clouded around it. It’s yellow teeth were pulled into an angry snarl while it watched the tiny humans below scramble for safety.

For a moment, time froze. The smoke had stopped billowing, the people had stopped in their plight for safety, and Faye’s heart sunk. This was exactly what Eren, Mikasa and Armin had experienced when Shiganshina fell.

They had always described the Colossal Titan as red and skinless, with exposed teeth and a bald head, but their words failed to convey the monstrosity’s grotesque form. It had an angry, hardened look only a seasoned soldier wore, and the devoted expression it wore for its mission.

This was no ordinary titan. At least if it were, Faye would be able to figure out how to evade them from personal experience. This was a human wrapped in a cocoon of nerves and flesh that protected them from prying eyes, and instead portrayed an inhuman and feral beast.

She didn’t even have to think about it, Faye bounded back up the steps, looping an arm around Mrs. Ral and started hurriedly rushing her to the door.

“Titans,” Faye hissed. “We need to be quick. No stopping. Make a beeline for the gate—”

“What?” Alexander breathed, his pace increasing as they hurriedly made their way down the stairs, “Titans, in Trost? What about the wall?”

“Kicked in. More titans are going to come pouring through the hole in the wall, so we need to move our asses and pray we’re quick enough to evade them.” Faye kept a calm exterior. If she started panicking, Alexander would panic, and his mother would slow them down with every breath she tried to take.

“How are we—” Mrs. Ral started.

“Stop talking. Focus on breathing slowly and keeping your ankle straight.” She helped the woman out the door, guiding them towards the masses that swarmed down the street. They were swept into the crowd, forced to keep pace with the rest of them or be trampled.

When Faye angled her head, just out of curiosity to look at her shop, her insides turned themselves inside out. There wasn’t even a shop to look at anymore. It had all been decimated by the rubble the Colossal Titan had kicked in, and the only thing that looked to have somewhat remained intact was half of her shoddy wooden sign that she’d painted with Alexander, the white paint chipped and peeling.

“Faye,” Alexander took in a shaky breath, “Are we going to die?”

“We will if you keep thinking about death instead of survival,” Faye clipped, “I didn’t see any titans, but they’re going to come bounding down one of these streets soon, and if we aren’t careful, we’ll get eaten.”

“Why are you so calm?” Alexander questioned, “I’m barely keeping it together and my mom is already crying—”

“Al, I’ve survived getting raped, being stabbed, drugged, and shot at. I don’t have the patience to worry about my own death anymore, do you understand me? Keep your eyes forward, your legs moving and—”

“When were you stabbed?” Alexander shouted over the crowd.

“When I first moved to Trost. Get over it,” Faye barked. “Get your head out of your ass, I mean it. Your mom is already a liability, and if we don’t—ow, what the hell Mrs. Ral?”

Mrs. Ral had wrenched out of Alexander’s grip, and instead barrelled into Faye’s side, knocking them into a side street and away from the safety of being tucked away in a crowd.

“If I die, I’m taking you with me,” she snarled, holding tightly to Faye’s wrist and pulling her along the empty street.

“Hey,” Faye tried to pull her hand off, but the woman’s grip was as solid as her newfound hatred for the doctor, and if Mrs. Ral’s ankle hurt, she showed no sign of it as she continued forward, “You’re going to get us both killed.”

“Better the both of us than just one of us, dear,” Mrs. Ral pointed out, “At least then I know Petra can still have the Captain, and Alexander won’t keep pining over you.”

“He’s gay!” Faye yelled, “He’s known he was gay for the last three years, you insufferable idiot. And I don’t want Levi! Or Mike, or Erwin, or anyone.” She was starting to breathe heavily, “I just wanted to run my f*cking tea shop and help people.”

“It’s a little late for that,” Mrs. Ral dryly replied, “You’ve probably helped a little too much.”

“I did not survive military training, getting betrayed by my brother, and certain death just to get eaten by a titan because a delusional old hag has some stupid idea in her head that I’m out to ruin her daughter’s life,” Faye snarled, still stumbling along.

“Well deal with it—”

“Move!” Faye screamed, just as a massive hand darted out of an alleyway, sweeping the spot her and Mrs. Ral had just been in. Faye then began tugging the woman along, forcing the older woman's legs to move just as fast as hers. “I swear on my father’s grave, if you get me killed, I’ll come back to haunt your ass,” Faye threatened, now on high alert.

It had been years. Eighteen long, awful years since she’d had her last day in the Warrior Program, but it was like something in her head had shifted, and her muscles sprung back into shape. It was all just adrenaline, but the rush of it had Faye feeling just that bit faster and sharper.

She could hear the thunderous footsteps in the distance, but she kept her eyes trained forwards, frustratedly pulling along Mrs. Ral, blocking out everything else. Which was why just as she reached a tunnel and felt her arm getting ripped backwards, Faye’s jaw unhinged and she screamed.

It was dislocated. It had to be. She could feel the ball part of her joint ripping out of the socket.

She looked up and saw Mrs. Ral now above her, holding onto Faye with both hands, while she was being dangled in the air by a titan. Blonde hair flashed inside of Faye’s head, and the titan morphed into something horrendous. Short blonde hair, protruding ribs, a slender body, and a euphoric grin.

“Mommy?” Faye heard herself whisper, but it was distant and gurgled. And then it all vanished. Brown eyes bore into her own, and Mrs. Ral was hoisted further into the air, and she could feel her grip slipping. Mrs. Ral was sweating bullets, screaming at Faye, but it was too frantic to understand, and after a split second, Faye felt herself falling backwards, away from Mrs. Ral’s outstretched hands.

She braced herself for the impact of hitting the ground, angling her feet downward. The second her feet met with the cobblestone, she forced her knees to buckle, and she barrel rolled to disperse to force of the fall. Her shoulder was smouldering, and she physically had to bite back the guttural whimper that bubbled up her throat. She turned back, already scrambling to her feet just in time to watch the titan’s jaw opening wide as it dangled Mrs. Ral above it’s waiting mouth like she were a mouse.

It all seemed to happen in slow motion. Its fingers let go of Alexander’s mother, her screams echoing against the concrete, and the old woman fell straight into the titan’s maw. It snapped it’s teeth up, and the crunch of bones sounded out while part of Mrs. Ral’s leg fell to the ground.

The titan’s eyes shifted, apparently having noticed Faye, and it took a step forward, a grin stretching its face, similar to what her mother wore. That was all the motivation it took for Faye to scramble into the tunnel, pumping her good arm and gaining momentum. She could hear the arm squeezing into the tunnel after her, but Faye was already halfway down, and when she made it to the other side, she peeked her head out, watching and listening for any titans lurking around the corners of buildings.

Her shoulder was pulsing, and every time she tried to move it, tears sprang in her eyes. She couldn’t even put it back into place without flinging her hand back as though she’d been burned. It would have to wait until she could find Alexander or a medic.

The streets were all silent, and Faye took that as a good sign. She started her journey down to the gate. It was a good twenty minutes away, but Faye cut corners by going down narrow alleyways, carefully avoiding the titans she could hear off in the distance. It was a wonder she’d only run into the one, and when she made it to the arched gateway, she let out a breath she hadn’t even realised she’d been holding.

She slipped into the crowds, being careful not to let her shoulder get battered around too much, and when she was deep enough that no one would spare her a second glance, Faye’s fingers popped open a small vial and she downed three pills in a single gulp.

*

The day might have been blistering hot, but when night fell over Ehrmich, it was disastrously cold. Faye sat against the wall, watching the refugees around her cluster together, trying to share their body heat with each other. They weren’t allowed very far into town, leaving them sequestered all along the gate with MPs and Garrison Soldiers guarding the exits, watchful for those who tried to slip away.

Faye had done what she could for her shoulder, but everytime she attempted to put it back into place, her hands shook, and she couldn’t bring herself to steel her resolve, so she relied on taking pain relievers until she could meet up with Alexander again.

She had also done what she could for the minor injuries some of the refugees sported, but her small bag of medical supplies had dwindled down to nothing more than a quarter jar of disinfectant and some gauze she saved for when she could finally shove her upper arm bone back into its socket.

It looked bad.

Earlier, when she had peeled back her shirt to take a look, she grimaced at how swollen and bruised it was, not to mention gruesomely disfigured. Green and yellow tendrils weaved out of the blackened part beneath her skin, spanning over her entire shoulder and part of her arm. She did her best to hide it away from prying eyes, but the odd square shape her shoulder took on wasn’t exactly easily hidden by her flimsy shirt. Every time she tried to move it or realign it, her hands shook at the exquisite pain so she settled on trying to rest and keep it immobile. Her hands had gone numb long before the night set in, and when the chilly air swept past her left arm, she barely paid any notice to it.

She passed the time wondering about Eren, Mikasa and Armin. If they’d made it out of Trost okay, how bad their injuries were, if they were even still alive… Mikasa was the least of Faye’s worries. The girl was built like an athlete and she had the reflexes of a cat, so if Faye had to put money on who would survive, it would no doubt be on Mikasa.

But then she thought of Eren and Armin. While Armin was intelligent and quick thinking, he lacked physical strength, and while Eren could hold off in a fight by himself for a bit, he had nowhere near as much stamina as Mikasa. He also often let his temper get the better of him too easily. Faye had seen all three of them a few months back, and she was sure three months couldn’t have been enough time to whip Armin into shape, and give Eren some semblance of higher intelligence and better emotion control. They had been training for the last three years, and sometimes, it still looked like they were ten.

She rubbed her cheek with her good hand, blowing out a long breath of air. At some point, she let her eyes close, and when they opened back up, it was morning, and she was slumped up against a familiar redhead.

He let out a groggy groan, and when he looked down to see Faye popping three pills into her mouth, he raised an eyebrow. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Dislocated my shoulder,” Faye grumpily replied, “Do you feel up to realigning it? Because I physically can’t. My hands are shaking too much, and everytime I move it, I instinctually rip my hand away.” It was getting annoying; she wanted to get it done and over with already.

“I don’t think I can,” Alexander swallowed, “That—” He took a peek at the disfigured shoulder, and he felt the bile rise into his throat before it all spewed out beside him, and he felt Faye rubbing his back soothingly.

“I’ll deal with it then. Just don’t look at it too much,” she assured him when the ginger stopped emptying his stomach. A long silence ensued, and Faye laid her head against the wall. “Your mom, she’s—”

“Dead,” Alexander finished, “I figured as much when I saw you, but not her.” Smart kid. “I didn’t even get to tell her I loved her.” Realistically, her chances of survival had dropped by fifty percent because of her ankle, but an additional twenty percent could be knocked off because of her ribs.

“How are you feeling about it?” It was hesitantly asked, and Alexander gave a shrug.

“Hasn’t set in yet.” Ouch. “I think I’ll have a moment like you did when your dad abandoned you, and you saw something and broke down.”

Faye gave a hum, nodding. “Better out than in,” She said vaguely.

“How did you feel when the numbness wore off?” Alexander asked, his eyes trained on the ground, not daring to look at Faye.

“Felt like my ribs all cracked and my heart withered away,” her voice was steady. Too much emotion too soon, and she didn’t want to overload Alexander, let alone herself. “I thought it would go away after a month, but then it turned into six months, and then a year, and time just kept passing. It never really went away. I just learned how to live with it.”

“How are you feeling right now?”

“I’ll be honest. It’s pretty bleak,” Faye’s throat had suddenly gone dry. “I’m waiting for some kind of good news, like that Eren is okay, or that the Scouts are back and everyone is safe,” She knew it was asking too much for both, but it was all she had to cling on to.

“Do you think Petra is okay?” Alexander hummed out.

“Couldn’t say,” Faye shrugged, “But I definitely hope so. Have you figured out what you’re going to say to her?”

“I was going to wing it,” he shrugged, “Maybe start with mom and then—” His voice cracked, and he buried his face in his hands, shielding his tears from the world while his shoulders heaved up and down in silent sobs. His heart clenched every time he tried to take a breath, and the air got lodged in his throat.

And when Faye wrapped her arm around his shoulder, he lost it, and anguished cries rang out into the empty air. It was like every bad thing that had ever happened in his life echoed inside his head and made itself known in every breath he took, every sob he let out.

It was well into the night when Alexander Ral’s tears ran out, and he slumped against the wall, tiredly rubbing his eyes. He hadn’t said anything to Faye, and she hadn’t said anything to him. It was a comforting silence; one that the both of them needed.

*

It was the second morning Faye and Alexander had spent sitting against the wall. The refugees all looked hollow-eyed and exhausted, and despite the temperature being blisteringly hot on the first day, they had all clumped together, in need of support. But now, on the second day, a rainstorm had rolled in, and everyone sat drenched to the bone, shivering, miserable and depressed.

Faye and Alexander had received minimal food rations and a bottle of water to share between them. Every once in a while, Alexander would break down for a few minutes before he pulled himself back together and tried to look like he wasn’t broken inside. It wasn’t like he could really control it though. None of them could.

Faye sat next to him, offering what little comfort she could, but when the rain started pouring, her heart sank, and she prayed she wouldn’t catch another fever. If she did, she wouldn’t survive it. Not when she didn’t have all of her medical supplies and a warm bed.

Then there was the issue of Faye’s shoulder. Alexander couldn’t stomach looking at it, and Faye lacked the resolve to pop it back into place, so she’d opted on suffering through it. She ran out of painkillers after the first afternoon, and she had no choice but to endure the sweltering pain.

“You should see a therapist,” Faye let out, “I think you could really benefit from it, maybe improve your mental state.”

Alexander opened his mouth, still struggling to catch a breath since his mother’s death. A therapist? Only the mentally ill needed to see a therapist, and he most definitely had not lost his sanity quite yet. He flinched, Faye’s words from years ago echoing inside his mind. “Stage one of Grief: Denial” He couldn’t even deny that he was in denial.

“Can you—”

“Not versed enough in psychology,” Faye cut in, already knowing exactly what he was going to ask. She watched his eyes shift down to stare at the muddy ground, looking despondent, and guilt ebbed its way into her. “And…” she hesitated. ‘And if I listen to you, I’ll be putting myself at risk.’ is what she wanted to say, but she quickly forced her lips closed. No. She was giving herself a mental health break. She deserved that much. Instead, she settled on: “I’ll find someone for you though; someone who knows more about it than me.”

“Nobody here knows more about it than you,” Alexander dryly pointed out, his lips curling just slightly for the first time since he made it into Ehrmich, “I don’t know where you learned all this sh*t from, but you’re the smartest person inside these walls, Faye.” He’d said it so sincerely, and when his eyes caught hers, she had to blink and quickly avert her eyes in embarrassment.

“I’m sure there are other people who are more intelligent, like Erwin or Armin,” she murmured. She watched a refugee kneel down before a woman, recognition lighting up their eyes and they tackled one another in glee at having finally found each other.

“That’s different,” Alexander insisted, rubbing his cheek tiredly, “They’re smart in a strategic and tactical way. If they want something, they know how to get it by twisting their words and putting themselves on a pedestal.” Faye couldn’t disagree. “But you’re smart in the ‘I have no other agenda’ way.”

“That’s not true,” Faye sighed, “I do it all out of crippling guilt.”

Alexander wasn’t sure he heard her right. “Guilt?” He echoed dumbly, “What could you possibly feel guilty over?” From the minute he met her, he had witnessed first hand the woman’s unending generosity and kindness. And then it dawned on him. It must have happened before she moved to Trost.

“I don’t really know,” Faye lied, chewing her lip, “Sometimes it feels like I have imposter syndrome, where I just feel like I don’t belong despite being the same as everyone else here.” That was pretty close to the truth. Sort of.

“Do you mean emotionally?” Al’s eyebrows furrowed, “Like you don’t have the right to feel sorry for yourself or something?”

Faye hummed, “Not quite. Sometimes I can look at a crowd, or even you, and I’ll realise that I just don’t fit the standard image here. Like I’m an alien or something.”

“Oh,” Alexander murmured, “I kind of understand you. Sometimes I don’t think I’ll be accepted into society if I come out as gay.” His analogy was valid, but it wasn’t the same. He was born within the walls, and that gave him as much of a right to live there as anyone else. His sexuality shouldn’t have even played a part. But it was similar, and Faye could credit that to him.

“Glad to know I’m not the only one.” The two leaned against each other, trying to pool together their body heat. “I guess this must’ve been how Eren, Mikasa and Armin felt when Shiganshina fell.”

“What? Because now we’re considered refugees?”

“Because I just lost everything I’ve put time and effort into over the last ten years, except for you,” Faye corrected, wetting her lips, “Feels weird. The shop was literally just a bunch of wood and rocks.” She felt a twinge flicker in her chest. Something akin to being despondent, she supposed.

Alexander said nothing, silently agreeing with his best friend, and they sat together for a long time before they drifted off to sleep.

It really only felt like a split second after Faye had shut her eyes before someone grabbed her dislocated shoulder, and she let out a guttural scream, muffling it with her hand. She could feel Alexander recoiling from her side, panicked at her sudden pain.

“Hange!” she could hear Levi yelling and reprimanding the scientist, and her eyes stung like someone had sucker punched her right in the nose. Instinctually, Faye’s hand darted out to hold her arm, but she flinched away. If she held onto it, it would only make the pain worse. She could hear Hange apologising and Levi trying to get her attention

“I’m fine,” Faye gritted out, her eyes screwing shut, “Really, it was probably an accident.”

“You look like sh*t,” Levi scowled, already shrugging off his coat to hand over to Faye, “And your shoulder…” His lips curled back in disgust. “How’d you manage that?”

“Titan,” Faye grunted, heaving out another breath while the pain simmered, and she balled up the jacket in her hands, not putting it on quite yet. It was a half lie, but she couldn’t bring herself to say anything in front of Alexander. He needed to be the one to ask about how his mother passed.

“What? Like when they first got into Trost?” Hange questioned incredulously, while Faye nodded. “That was two days ago, don’t tell me you’ve been dealing with that this entire time,” Her finger darted out to point at the blackened shoulder. “I thought you were a doctor. This should have been an easy fix for you.”

“I couldn’t do it,” Faye said bitterly, “Every time I tried, my hand would recoil out of instinct, and Alexander can’t even look at it without throwing up.” The words tasted acrid on her tongue.

“Do you want me to…” Levi had started to offer.

“Please, if you don’t mind,” Faye nodded.

“Do you have anything to bite down on?” This was on the more common list of injuries soldiers received, and he was no newcomer to the sight. She shook her head, and he silently swore. “Use the jacket.”

“What?” Faye whirled around to look at him. “But—”

“Use the sh*tty jacket,” Levi repeated, clearly annoyed, “I can always get a new one, but you’ll bite your tongue off, if you don’t.” He watched the hesitation flash in her eyes, and he fixed her with a hard glare, silently daring her to challenge his orders.

“Lay down. I can’t do it if you’re leaning up against the wall like that.” Faye complied, resting her back against the muddy ground and lifting the arm of the leather jacket into her mouth. “On the count of three,” Levi promised, watching Faye brace herself for it. He manoeuvered her arm out in front of her, and he popped it back into place on two, ignoring her tormented scream, muffled by the leather.

Alexander swore from beside Hange, eyes wide and sympathetic. “Worst is over now,” they assured.

“Do you need a sling?” Levi asked, gently settling his hand on the small of Faye’s back to help her sit up.

“I’ll make one later,” she mumbled, “Thanks.” It was like blood had finally started to flow normally again, and her fingertips started tingling while she flexed her hand experimentally a few times, “Anyway, why’re you here?”

Hange let out an excited sound, stepping forward. “Faye Jaeger,” they addressed, “You’ve been formally ordered to attend and potentially act as a witness at tomorrow’s deliberation.” And when Faye tilted her head, not knowing what any of this was about, Hange grinned widely, her molars peeking through, “Your brother—”

“Hange,” Levi cut in, a distressed frown apparent on his face. His eyes looked a little bloodshot, and the bags beneath them were dark and noticeable. Had he been taking the sleeping medication like he was supposed to? “You take Mr. Ral to Petra and her father. I’ll inform Faye.”

“But that’s the fun part,” Hange whined, crossing their arms and petulantly stomping their foot, “I wanted to see her face when I told her that her brother—”

“There are people watching, listening,” Levi hissed, pouncing forward to physically move Hange’s head to observe the refugees who had started staring at the group. “You don’t know how to be discreet or sensitive to the situation, so go take Alexander and I’ll handle Faye.”

Faye’s stomach lurched, and for a moment, she swayed. What had happened to Eren? Was he dead? In a coma?

“Fine, fine,” Hange glowered, snatching Alexander’s wrist and tugging him forward through the crowd.

“Is Eren okay?” The words came out just as small as Faye felt, and when Levi turned to look at her, his eyes softened, and his lips pulled out of a scowl and into a thin line.

“Here,” he took the jacket from Faye’s hands and helped slide it over her arms, “He’s fine at the moment. He’s been unconscious the last few days though.”

“What kind of trouble is he in?” If Faye were being honest, she wasn’t sure she wanted to know. Levi had started guiding her forward, gently holding her elbow to keep her close to his side while they stalked through the refugees.

“When we’re away from curious ears,” he promised.

Chapter 10: 6. Faye's Trial

Chapter Text

Faye strolled alongside Levi in the pouring rain while they made their way to Mitras. It was bleak outside as the dark clouds rolled over the green hills along the trail the pair used. If Levi was cold, he showed no signs of it despite only wearing his green scouts' cape- having given his jacket to Faye.

His stomach gave a lurch when he glanced over at the illicit doctor. Erwin should have been the one to tell Faye. He had a way with words, and if Erwin were here, Levi was sure Faye wouldn’t look so constipated and worried.

“Here’s your ring back,” Levi awkwardly pulled the ring from his pocket, handing it over to Faye who raised an eyebrow. She was utterly unaware as to how sh*tty he felt inside, like a rotting carcass that had been lying out in the hot sun all day.

“You added twine to it?” She sounded amused, though he didn’t share the sentiment- how could he?

“I didn’t want to risk losing it.” His head bobbed up and down numbly.

“So,” She drawled, taking a nervous breath. “My brother? How deep in sh*t is he?”

“Knee deep,” Levi sighed. “He’s being detained in the cellar of a courthouse right now, and when he wakes up there’s going to be a deliberation to decide what to do with him.” Faye rubbed her temple, and Levi noted the dark circles under her eyes and pale skin. “I-” Levi hesitated for a second. How was he supposed to tell her without sounding like a lunatic? “He was eaten by a titan,” He started slowly, buying some time to think about his next words carefully. “There were reports another titan exploded out from that titan, and later shifted back into your brother,” He was nearly reciting the documents he’d skimmed over, struggling to find his own words. She was obviously startled, taking a few long seconds to process his words. After a moment of silence, he added: “We’re aiming for the Survey Corps to take him.” As if that would help ease her shock.

Faye’s heart hammered spastically. How had Eren shifted? Did he finally remember that night with Grisha? Her hand numbly reached out, looking for a wall to lean on, but instead, she found her knees buckling again. Levi was quick to reach his own hand out, grasping onto her elbow gently and guiding her to the ground to sit down. He could use her stupor to his advantage

“He said something about a basem*nt,” He slowly began, letting the words hang in the air for a second and watching her grim face freeze.

“Like, in Shiganshina?” The words sounded lame and stupid when she asked, and she mentally hit herself with a brick. Eren had never once been remotely interested in any other basem*nt, just the one their father used as a study. Levi nodded, noting how clammy her hand had become. “Levi, I-” She sucked in a breath, what was he going to do if she told him the truth? What would happen to her if the government found out? What would become of Eren?

“Yes?” He drawled out, waiting somewhat impatiently for her to confess.

“That basem*nt was the one secret my father had,” No, she couldn’t risk indirectly killing Eren. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself. “I’ve only been down there once,” She admitted. It was safer to stick as close to the truth as she could. “I-” She swallowed again, “It was his study, if there was something to hide, it would be down in that basem*nt,” She concluded, watching Levi give a stony nod.

Once a criminal, always a criminal.

“I know you’re holding back,” He watched her shrink under his knowing stare, guilt rolling off of her in palpable waves. “But whatever it is, I hope you divulge before it’s too late.” He couldn’t bring himself to use the chilling tone he would have used with anyone else, she’d somehow managed to get on his good side, and for once in his life, he didn’t hate being stuck in the company of someone else.

She blinked once. Twice. Three times.

“I uh-” She didn’t know what to say. “I was serious when I said I’ve only been down there once.” She was honest, Levi could tell by the desperate way she peered up into his eyes. She was being vulnerable, and he could appreciate that.

“But you know what’s so important about it,” Levi stated.

“Well-” She chewed her lip. “His old journals.”

“You won’t tell me about the contents?”

“Unless you want me going into a panic attack,” Faye gave a weak smile.

“You know Erwin will get it out of you one way or another, right?” He watched her bob her head in confirmation. “And if it isn’t Erwin, it’ll be Hange,” Another nod. “And you know I’m going to tell Erwin about this conversation?” He offered Faye a hand, hauling her up while she nodded again.

She trailed along beside Levi, and after a few minutes, she pushed out a sigh, raking a hand through her hair with an annoyed frown on her face.

“I’m being backed into a corner, aren’t I?” She watched Levi’s jaw clench and a dour frown tug his lips down. He said nothing, but his silence was an answer in and of itself. “It starts off with isolating me, separating me from Alexander,” She met Levi’s eyes, but she couldn’t pick apart his emotions, so she continued. “It was strategic of Erwin to send you, really. I’m sure you told him about the night I gave you a massage, and when he saw me pass the ring back to you,” She sucked in her cheeks, pursing her lips. “He’s using the friendship we’ve established to lure me into a false sense of security-”

“Is it working?” It was asked out of genuine curiosity, interested to see how comfortable she felt around him.

She hesitated, her brows knitting together to pin Levi with an inquisitive stare, trying to peel back the layers on his body language and emotions, and after a long, hard minute, she sighed. “Yeah.” She let her answer simmer into the air for a second, and inwardly, Levi found himself equally pleased as he was disgusted. “Then you’re going to do something so screw up my trust, and Erwin is going to use my vulnerable emotional state to recruit me.”

“Sounds like you’ve got it all figured out,” Levi stoically voiced.

“No,” Faye’s eyebrows furrowed, and she stared at the ground in concentration. “I don’t know why he wouldn’t send Mike, and why he would have Hange bring Alexander to see Petra, you could have left him with the refugees just as easily.” Her tongue slid over her bottom teeth before she chewed her lip. “And I hate myself for knowing exactly what he’s doing, but I can’t weasel my way out of it.” Bertha was right when she said Erwin was manipulative. Probably even got off on it just a bit.

“Mike wouldn’t do it.” He’d said it so quietly, Faye wondered if she’d imagined it, but when her eyes swiveled up to Levi’s, he held tightly to his deadpan expression, locking away whatever resentment he felt toward the situation. The more stoic he looked, the more emotion he was probably bottling up.

Her stomach curdled, and her mouth went dry. Whatever it was, it was going to seriously screw with her head, and she thumbed the ring inside her pocket.

“How angry do you think I’m going to be?” It was a simple question. Eight words long, and straightforward.

“I think you’ll feel more betrayed and hurt than angry,” Levi muttered out, balling his fists.

“How much do you value this friendship?” It was another straightforward question, one that he had no clue how to even begin answering. He shifted, averting his gaze off to the distant walls and grit his teeth together.

“Okay,” Faye started again. “Let me reword the question.” She cracked her back, feeling the joints pop. “How remorseful are you at an action you haven’t even committed?” No answer. “Fine,” She huffed, grabbing the ring and stuffing it into his hand. “You hold onto this until after the hearing. That way I’ll have to talk to you, and you can try and explain your sh*tty reasoning.”

He swallowed, staring at Faye’s mother’s ring. “I can’t-”

“Stop it. You didn’t go through the trouble of telling me about your mom for sh*ts and giggles, or my life as a prostitute for nothing. You told me from the beginning that this is going to be a sh*tty friendship if I keep questioning it,” His mouth had gone dry, panic welling up inside of him. He could handle Faye being angry with him, but the moment she forgave him the guilt would smother him.

“You’re going to hate me,” He tried, but Faye shook her head, leveling him with a passive smile.

“Maybe for a while, but give me an hour to cool down, and I’m sure I’ll get over it one way or another.”

“You’re insane.”

“It took you that long to figure it out?”

“Why would you-”

“If I can’t keep questioning this friendship, neither can you,” Faye shrugged. “You did me a favor by letting me in on some of the plan and warning me beforehand, so I have to assume you’re twisting yourself into knots over it all.”

He said nothing. There wasn’t anything he really could say. Faye had hit the nail on the head once again.

*

The courthouse was massive. Overarching pillars decorated the entrance, and the walls had been hand-painted with images depicting angels, demons, and mortals all vying for a swift victory. It had sconces that lit up the room and set a soft, but bright glow to the walls, and the curtains had all been pulled back to display the city of Mitras just below the tall hill and down a forested pathway.

When Faye had first stepped in, her breath caught in her throat, and she suddenly felt too poor to be standing in the doorway. She’d known Mitras was filled with only the wealthy, but this was pushing it, no? She looked out of place with her mud-crusted pants, torn shirt, and sandals, not to mention Levi’s jacket that still had indentations from her teeth on the sleeve. She was bruised, and dirty, and she felt like a con artist trying to swindle their way into high society.

But then Levi escorted Faye to her designated room, and she swirled around to pin him with an inquisitive stare as if to ask ‘ Is it all really just for me? ’ and all he did was shrug, as though the room wasn’t bigger than the dining area of her tea shop. Levi left shortly after, suggesting she get cleaned up and prepare for the upcoming trial which would take place once Eren woke up, and he left.

That had been two days ago.

And now, Faye had been sitting in the same locked room, alone with her thoughts, and she was slowly going mad.

Of course, it had been nice in the beginning, she had a scalding hot bath and she washed away the dirt and blood that had crusted over, taking extra care to try and massage the tender muscles on her shoulders. She’d eaten her fill of the fruit and ham that was in the fridge, and she’d laid in the king-sized bed, letting her eyes rest for a few hours.

But then she woke up, and she’d tried the door, and her heart sank when she realized she’d been locked in. Like a bird in a gilded cage.

So she did what she could to bide the time away, drinking fine wine, (Well, tried to. She took one sip and decided she could live without the wine) She checked the desk for stationary, but was disappointed when the drawers were all empty. She checked the nightstand for a bible, but there was only half a chicken bone in the corner. The closet had a military uniform in it, but Faye had quickly decided she’d rather die than be forced to wear something that branded her as a military dog.

So she’d spent the day carefully washing her clothes, while she was wrapped up in a blanket. And when she finally put them up to dry, she sat down at the desk, and she breathed out the heaviest sigh she’d ever heard, hiding her face in her hands while she silently wondered how long she’d be subjected to the solitude. She stared out of the window, watching the citizens of Mitras from high atop a hill, they were all too small to make out, but it soothed her to know there were still people going about their daily lives. Sometimes she’d try to imagine the conversations they would have, perhaps about the weather or the refugees, but they always sounded phony inside of Faye’s head.

She’d fallen asleep at the desk, and her back ached from the bizarre angle she’d slept in. And when her stomach grumbled, she ignored it and settled for water, and when her clothes had finished drying, she shrugged them on, glad to have some sense of normalcy.

And on the second day, someone knocked on her door.

They were loud, booming thuds against the door, startling Faye out of her reveries, and her hand jutted out to claw at the desk to keep herself from falling off the chair. The pounding at the door had turned into a dull throb in Faye’s head, just below the skin, and she gently massaged her temple.

Faye’s hand twisted the doorknob, and she froze in place at the sight of Petra standing on the other side with her arms crossed, lips tugged down into a frown.

“What happened to my mother?” The ginger hissed, anger and fury seething in her eyes. She'd crossed the threshold of the door, slamming it behind her

“It was my fault,” Faye breathed, guilt seeping into her bones and smothering her. “I- She was angry with me, and we got separated from the crowds,” She forced air into her lungs, willing them to inflate despite the overwhelming urge to keep them empty. “We kept going down back roads which took longer and a titan-”

“It should have been you.”

“I know,” Faye whispered. She couldn’t breathe, she was stuck taking in shallow breaths. “I know it should have been me.” It wasn’t a lie, if it had been Faye, Petra and Alexander would still have their mother, and a murderer would be off the streets. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re a piece of sh*t,” Petra spat, “Garbage that should have been crushed under the foot of a titan. You should have just killed yourself.”

Faye could only nod while she swallowed the lump in her throat. She couldn’t even argue with Petra. In all of Faye’s twenty-five years of living, she’d killed thousands of people, people who were most likely innocent, who had families and children, and jobs. She was a killer. A killer who didn’t even know the names of her victims, let alone what they looked like. The few individuals she had seen and been directly responsible for, well, their image inside of Faye’s head had eroded with time and they were little more than blurry photos inside of Faye’s head that no one else would ever remember.

“I hope you rot in jail, execution would be far too nice of a punishment,” Petra's hands balled into fists at her side, “You’re a slu*t,” Faye would be lying if the words didn’t sting in the deepest pits inside her soul, ringing true. “Your mom would be ashamed to have a daughter like you-”

“Hey,” Faye growled lowly, her eyes narrowing. “You can say what you want about me, but leave my family out of this.”

“That’s right,” Petra let out a bitter laugh. “Your family.” her lips curled into a cruel, gnashing grin. “How could I forget. Your brother is on trial because he’s a titan, which would probably make you an accomplice and a traitor to the walls.” Despite being petite, Petra was no joke, and her hatred of Faye bit into her like a titan sinking it's teeth into a human. “And your father probably abandoned you because he knew how much of a whor* you are, and you’d only disgrace his name. After all, he was a real doctor- unlike you.” Faye’s face contorted at Petra’s words while they reverberated inside her head. “And your mother. Who even knows where she is now. Probably dead.”

She was right. Petra was probably right, and it was literally all Faye’s fault.

The guilt was smothering Faye’s insides, and whatever retorts Faye had got caught in her throat, and all she could do was listen to Petra, and silently agree with her words.

“I should kill you here and now to end your misery,” She threatened, lips curled down in disgust. “You’re a sniveling brat who ended my mother's life when you could have done something, but instead you chose to be selfish, and you came out of Trost alive while my mother’s corpse sat in the belly of a titan before she went up in steam-” Her fist raised, ready to strike Faye, and just as it came crashing down, three rapt knocks echoed out into the otherwise silent room.

At first, Faye wondered if she’d hallucinated them, but then the knocks came again and she caught eye contact with Petra, who’d frozen with her fist centimeters away from Faye’s nose. Slowly, Petra started to back up, but it was too late, the door swung open, and there, standing in all his glory, was Erwin.

No one moved a muscle, Erwin’s hand remained on the doorknob, his eyes unflinching while he took in the scene. Petra’s fist had only moved an inch upward, and she looked to be in an extremely compromising situation, and Faye- sh*t. She was stuck in the middle of it all, still struggling to get in a full breath and fill her lungs with air.

“It was my fault,” The words rushed out of Faye’s lips while she scrambled to step away from Petra. “I was just asking Petra about proper form in hand to hand and she was just giving me some pointers, I swear.” Guilt seized the medic, that was the first time she’d outright lied to Erwin. She felt like a teenager again, lying to adults in an attempt to shift the blame.

“I see,” Erwin started slowly, brows knitting together before he entered. “Ms. Ral, if you would be so kind, I was hoping to have a word with Doctor Jaeger,” His eyes slid off of Faye to his soldier, who looked ready to piss herself.

“Of course, Commander Erwin,” She sent up a salute, and she scurried out the door, gently closing it behind her.

“That was a lie, but don’t punish Petra,” Faye muttered out, finally pumping air into her lungs while her diaphragm contracted downward to make space. “I deserved it.”

Erwin’s lips twitched down, “I could hear her through the door, you’re lucky I interrupted when I did or-”

“I deserved it,” Faye repeated, her heart hammering in her chest while she looked up at Erwin. It was all she really could say, not knowing the words to convey how remorseful she felt inside.

“I can’t turn a blind eye, Faye,” Erwin tried, but the illicit doctor shook her head, sending up a weak smile.

“Consider it a favor then.”

She watched Erwin set down a bottle of whiskey before he disappeared wordlessly into the kitchen, and a few seconds later he returned with two glasses. His steps were long, but they tittered more than usual, and when he finally slumped into the chair at the table, she tilted her head in wonder.

Commander Erwin Smith looked like he had just fought off a titan with his bare hands.

His hair had been tousled, probably from running his fingers through it a few hundred times. His shoulders had sagged, he hadn’t shaved in a few days, and he looked like he got less sleep than Levi did on a daily basis. His hands were shaky - not so much that anyone would ever notice unless they were looking for it - And the apologetic curve his eyebrows took when he looked at her told Faye everything she needed to know.

He hadn’t meant to keep her locked up like an animal.

“Do you have any cigarettes?” The words tumbled out of Faye’s lips while she took a seat, earning a curious tilt of Erwin’s head, and his lips curled up.

“I didn’t know you smoked,” His hand had already ripped into his pocket, and he offered her the pack with no hesitation. She was likely just as stressed as he was.

“I don’t,” She shyly murmured, but regardless of her words, she gratefully took the pack, fishing the lighter from inside along with a cigarette before she lit it and inhaled the nicotine greedily, flicking the ashes into a small, crystal ashtray on the table. “Not usually, at least.”

The Commander let out an amused hum. “Must be bad if you’re breaking your abstinence then,” He dipped his head in understanding. “My apologies.”

Faye tsked, taking a long drag. “They’re your cigarettes, shouldn’t you be the one quitting?” The smoke blew out from her lips lazily, ignoring his apology. He let himself sip on the amber liquid he poured, relishing in the way it burned down his throat.

“Levi hates them,” He said fondly, something soft glinting in his eyes, “Says they’ll rot my lungs.”

“He’s not wrong,” Faye agreed. “Your lungs will literally turn black because of all the smoke, and it takes decades to fix.” She breathed in, her eyes fluttering closed for a half-second. “Feels good to pollute my body.” She watched Erwin give a small, halfhearted smile while he chuckled. “So?” Faye finally took a sip from her own glass. “What’s the verdict? How long am I going to be stuck in here for?”

“You seem to be a very popular topic in conversations these days, Faye,” His lips pulled into a thin line, and though Faye looked to be calm on the outside, her stomach had curdled, and she felt sick. “Many believe you to be a co-conspirator with Eren, and Nile Dok had your shop searched again,” His eyes met hers, and he took a second to try and figure out how she was feeling. “They found evidence of your practices,” He assured. “And you’re going to have a court hearing as a formality.”

Faye drummed her fingers against the glass, while she flicked the cigarette, frowning. “I took precautions before I left the shop.” Her words were muttered out as if she were quietly voicing her thoughts. “It was all beneath the ground...So how did it-”

Erwin’s eyes narrowed, and he leaned forward in his hair, intrigued by her words. “When you say ‘beneath the ground...’” He trailed off, forgoing the end of his sentence.

“The cellar. It was all in the cellar. I dug a four-foot-deep hole and everything was piled into it.” There was a hard look in her eyes, “And I saw my shop on our way out, it was all in shambles. There wasn’t even a front door to get in with.” She tried to swallow back the bile that rose in her throat, and she took another drag, hoping to ease her nerves.

“Nile mentioned not much being left of your shop,” He teetered in his chair, flexing his fingers. “And he said he had some of the debris cleared to investigate, but he didn’t mention a cellar.”

“They checked it the last time they stopped by,” Faye shrugged. “I don’t really keep much down there because of how dirty and damp it is so it was never of much use,” She wet her lips, sighing. “But Eren and his friends were supposed to have a graduation party, and I wanted to be careful about it all, so I moved everything down there and covered it up with a layer of dirt just to be safe. It should literally all be buried underground.”

“Faye, there was no cellar on the report-”

“I’m telling you the truth,” Faye cut in, raking her hand through her hair. “I was meticulous about it all, there’s no way the MPs should have found anything- least of all after the wall was breached.” Something about it all wasn’t making any sense.

“Do you think you’re being framed?” Erwin bluntly questioned.

“I think I’m being set up,” The brunette corrected. “Someone wants me jailed or dead.” And after a long second, she let out a whistle and a wry smile. “Wonder what I did to piss them off.”

“And you don’t think it’s one of your...Shadier contacts?” Something inside of him was eating away at his insides. Someone had to have been at the shop after the breach, they would have had to risk their lives just to plant evidence of Faye’s illicit activities

“I can’t think of anyone that I’ve wronged,” But then her shoulders tensed, and she clenched her jaw. “Well, there's one guy, he’s kind of… Unhinged, but-” It was nagging away at her. “-I don’t think he’s that unstable.” Stone-cold killer, absolutely. But would he go through all the trouble just to kill Faye? She couldn’t imagine it.

“Faye, this is serious, if you have his name-”

“You can’t,” It came out a little too quickly, and Erwin’s eyebrows raised in surprise and intrigue. “He’s got connections to people in very high places. He has no issue offing either of us if we become a threat to him.” It was true too. She knew he was a serial killer, she knew and she still sold him drugs and poison.

“What do you propose we do then?” The blond rubbed his temple tiredly, screwing his eyes shut when his head throbbed.

“I have no clue,” It came out quiet, her teeth chewing at her bottom lip. “Let’s just see how the trial pans out. Worst comes to worst, you can make a proposition for me to join the scouts and serve a few years as your medic.”

Erwin’s eyes snapped open to stare at her in blatant shock, she was putting out her cigarette, and she let her hand rest on the table, staring back calmly despite the cognitive dissonance she felt inside her mind. It was like a war, one part of her wanted to scream out in frustration and anger and pure, unadulterated guilt, while the other felt smaller than a walnut, and wished for it all to just end- like she wanted to take a nap and never wake up.

“If I’d known all it took for you to agree was to threaten you with jail time-”

“Alright,” Faye’s lips curled up at Erwin’s sarcasm. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. I’m agreeing because my tea shop isn’t an option, and I can’t help anyone without supplies.” She kept it lighthearted and ironic. “Besides, before I agree to anything, you need to ask Eren for his permission about this.”

“Done.” There was no hesitation, and his eyes shone in determination. “What else?”

“I want a garden to grow all my herbs and plants,” He nodded. “And I need a decent-sized infirmary- if possible, a medical wing,” Another head bob. “You’ll need to buy me a wide array of supplies. And- stop nodding before you even hear what I’m going to ask for.”

“Money and resources aren’t an issue, Faye,” He leaned forward, brushing his fingertips over hers. “If I need, I’ll pay for it all out of my own pocket.” She squinted her eyes, trying to discern whether or not he was telling the truth. “Do you know how many casualties we had thanks to your medical bag?” Slowly, she shook her head, “One. One casualty. My soldiers patched up a fair share of bodies, but that was over fifteen men who got to live another day and make it back to the walls.” He gave her a moment to let the words register and sink in. “Now imagine how many we could save if you were there.”

“There’s no evidence to suggest I could save them all,” She reminded, apprehension brewing in her guts, but Erwin leaned back in his chair, tipping his glass to his lips with a smug smile.

“You’re right, but I’ve seen your work. You’ll lower our death rates drastically.” He said it so confidently, that for a second, Faye believed him. But then, he looked as if a lightbulb had gone off inside his head, and he reached into his pocket. “I almost forgot, Alexander requested I pass along this message to you,” He handed a crisp envelope, watching curiously when Faye ripped it open.

Crazy Uncle Orwell is on the case, don’t sweat it.

-Alexander Ral

“Huh,” Faye murmured, easing the tension in her shoulders and unclenching her jaw. “Looks like I don’t have to be too worried about tomorrow after all.” She started to rip the letter, and inwardly, Erwin’s heart shattered. He’d been waiting all day for Faye to open it up and tell him about the contents. “Don’t get involved in my trial tomorrow, I’ve got it covered,” Faye assured. “Do I get to see Eren before-”

“It’s best you don’t see him before his trial.” His jaw had clenched, and Faye tilted her head.

“What is Levi going to do?” His spine froze, and he took a second to think of a reply. At his silence, Faye chewed her lip, “Can you at least promise me that whatever your plan is, it’ll work?”

He nodded, slowly, and Faye forced a breath out. “Eren’s trial is a few hours after yours, you should get some sleep and make a list of the supplies you’ll be needing.”

*

When Faye was escorted into the courtroom, she felt the eyes boring into her skin, picking apart the pathetic way she stumbled in. She’d been cuffed behind her back while MPs shoved her forward, and when she reached the front, she was cuffed to a pole, forced to kneel before the court. Whispers broke out among those wealthy enough to attend her hearing, and it disgusted Faye to know that her fate was a source of entertainment to them, like some kind of sh*tty novel.

The doors behind Faye opened, but she kept her eyes settled on the ground in front of herself in a hard stare. The judge certainly took his time getting to the dais up front, languidly hanging his jacket on the back of the chair before he sat down. It was an ornate chair, probably cost more than her life, and when he’d gotten himself settled, he mumbled something out- Faye couldn’t quite hear over the sound of her heartbeat pounding in her ears- and he peered down at a small pile of papers.

He looked like every other wealthy man in Mitras. Fat, sweaty, and pompous. His suit was expensive if the golden buttons were any indication, and his watch gleamed in the early morning sunlight.

For a second, they met each other's gaze, and they sized the other up. He was an older, greying man, and from Faye’s spot on the floor, he looked superior and godlike. She was all too aware that Judge Orwell held her life in his palm, and by the subtle tilt of his lips, he was conscious of it too. She was below him, and he could squash her within the blink of an eye.

He cleared his throat, hiding the curve his lips took when Faye narrowed her eyes.

“Your name is Faye Jaeger and you own a quaint tea shop in Trost,” He stated. “Is that correct?” He’d discarded whatever amusem*nt he held for Faye, and she tilted her head, trying to get some sort of read on him. His voice hadn’t come out imposing or anything, but it was a well-known fact that anyone who knew how to lie could manipulate their microexpressions to seem more appealing.

She nodded, keeping otherwise quiet.

“Due to the nature of your situation, I’ve been asked to oversee your hearing,” He informed, seemingly unbothered. “Any objections?”

“Only should you drag this out longer than necessary,” Faye grumbled out. When the judge’s lips curved up, hers tilted down in disgust. This was all a game to him.

“Let us proceed,” He ignored. “Due to the discretion of the Military Police, your existence hasn’t reached the masses, and thus, we risk no outbreak of civil unrest.” In other words, he could have Faye subjected to whatever punishment he saw fit without the masses rising against him. Not that they would though, it was, after all, the citizens of Mitras who lost money because of her unwillingness to attend the university. “In the reports, it’s stated your establishment was thoroughly searched, is this correct?”

“Yes sir,” Faye kept her chin up, and she met the judge's eye stoically.

On one of the balconies, Erwin stood next to Mike, watching the scene unfold beneath them with a frown. Something seemed bizarre about the judge, and Faye’s attitude towards John Orwell made him watch with rapt attention.

“And in your own words, what did they find?” He jovially questioned despite the tense atmosphere, seemingly oblivious to it all.

“Absolutely nothing,” She deadpanned. “I was questioned about an old first aid kit my father gifted me when I first moved to Wall Rose, and a spare room I used as a makeshift garden.”

“Commander Nile Dok stated you kept medical-grade scalpels inside your first aid kit,” He shifted in his chair, and he spoke to Faye as though he were explaining a math concept to a child. “Do you deny this?”

“My father was a doctor, sir,” Faye co*cked her head. “He was always paranoid he might need supplies whenever he visited, so he made sure to slip some into my first aid kit.” No one had interrupted yet, and Faye clung tightly to the hope her trial would wrap up quickly.

“And the spare room?”

“Used to grow herbs and plants for my shop and practices,” She replied, not missing a beat. Her nonchalance made Erwin wary, something was definitely off about the judge, he kept smiling at Faye the way a predator eyes its prey.

“And you maintain you never used any of the medical-grade supplies?” He shuffled his papers, stifling the entertained look on his face when Faye pursed her lips.

“No sir,” She forced herself to say. “I don’t maintain any such thing.” Her palms were sweating, and her knees ached, not being used to kneeling on the floor for more than a minute at most. This whole trial was an annoyance, but knowing Orwell and his affinity for theatrics, it didn't surprise Faye that he was carrying it all out.

“And on average, how often would you estimate you used the supplies?” It was all there in Nile’s handwriting, of course, but he wanted to hear Faye say it.

“Daily.”

“You’re incriminating yourself, no?” He leaned forward, looking down his nose at Faye curiously. “You realize you could be sentenced to execution?” He was trying to faze her out, make her sweat as much as he was, and Faye was having absolutely none of it.

“Just stating the facts, sir,” She mumbled back sassily.

“Alright,” He leaned back again, clasping his hands. “And how many people would you estimate you’ve killed due to the nature of your illicit practices and deals?”

She sucked in a breath, steeling herself. “Thousands, at least.” ‘ 5472- including Mrs. Ral- ’ Faye thought. Erwin frowned. She was that lethal? From the way she’d spoken about it in the past, he’d assumed it was a few dozen at most. How long had she been procuring deadly drugs? But more importantly, why?

“Observe!” Someone yelled from one of the balconies. “She shows no remorse for the blood on her hands, execute her.” Whispers broke out, and she could distinctly feel people pointing in her direction to gossip.

Judge Orwell hummed, smirking smugly while Faye outwardly cringed. “Yes, not even a grimace.” He clicked his tongue and banged his gavel, demanding the room's attention again.“How many patients would you approximate you’ve treated in the last ten years?” Ten was a specific number, and if his co*cked head was any indication, he hadn’t just pulled it out of his ass.

“I never kept count,” Faye tried to say, weaseling her way out of the question. Of course she kept count. She was at number 7849 if she included Mike and Levi in her numbers.

“Guess.” The judge urged, a sad*stic smile curled on his lips.

“Thousands of treatments, I don’t know about the number of patients though,” She watched his eyes flit down to his papers for a moment.

“And Bertha Bauer?” He inquired. “How long have you been providing her with drugs for her employees?” Erwin’s eyes narrowed at the mention of Bertha. She had been an annoying pain in his neck every month whenever he needed to release some steam, and when she had threatened blackmail, he threw the option right back into her face. She could have severely damaged his reputation, and she should have been glad he hadn’t taken harsher actions.

Faye’s spine stiffened, and the hair on the nape of her neck stood on edge. “What does this-”

“Answer the question, Ms. Jaeger.” Judge Orwell cut in.

“Seven years,” Faye’s forehead creased at the delighted expression the judge wore, and he clapped his hands together. She’d been procuring Bertha with birth control, muscle relaxants, and occasionally tea for seven, long years. Would have even considered her more of a friend than a business partner.

“And were you aware that she’s been feeding the Military Police lies about you for the last seven years?” He was leaning forward over the desk, peering down at Faye hungrily. Like she was a piece of meat he’d carefully curated.

“Yes sir, but she-”

“And were you aware that earlier this morning, Ms. Bauer attended her own trial?”

Faye’s stomach curdled, and her heart dropped, mouth going dry while the words caught on her throat, “No sir, I had no idea.” She wasn’t sure the rest of the courtroom heard her, but the judge certainly did.

“She’s been executed,” He informed, “As a result of your actions, do you take full responsibility?” She was at 5473 now.

“Yes sir, of course, I do.” The news winded her, and the room spun like a tightly coiled spring. Never in Faye’s life had she felt so pliant and disgusted with herself, and she hated every second that she was subjected to being scrutinized by the sad*stic judge.

“And do you feel any remorse?” He questioned, licking his lips.

“What kind of f*cking question is that?” Faye snapped. “Of course I do you piece of-”

“Order!” Orwell yelled, banging his gavel again while grinning. “Answer the question, Ms. Jaeger, or you’ll be penalized with harsher severity.”

“Yes sir,” Faye ground out. “I feel guilty for their deaths.” It was only a trial. She could cry when she made it away from prying eyes and hushed voices. Her dignity and pride deserved that much, at the very least.

“All of them?” His eyes scanned hers, searching for vulnerability. It was a high he got off on. He loved watching her crumble in front of his eyes, but nobody else needed to know that.

“All of them,” Faye confirmed. “Even the people I never met. They all had their own intricate lives, and because of my irresponsible actions, they’ve all perished.”

“And what of the lives you saved?” He was digging into her now. “Surely you must realize they’re also victims of your actions, no?”

“All due respect, sir,” Faye snapped. “But you’re being a pretentious asshole, and I’d rather you kept your questions-” A fist connected with her jaw, and her face swept to the side, burning and throbbing.

“Answer the question,” He repeated, absolutely delighted at the shade of green and purple Faye’s chin was slowly turning.

“f*ck you,” She spat, blood coating the floor.

“Oh you minx,” Orwell breathed, his hand subtly snaking off the counter and away from prying eyes. “Don’t try to worm your way out of this.” And when his eyes met disobedient ones, he raised his free hand, a soldier’s foot swept forward into her gut, effectively knocking the wind out of Faye. “Answer the question.”

“I regret not helping more people,” She gasped through the pain. “I probably did a better job of diagnosing those people than any of your doctors could ever hope to-” The soldier’s hand darted out, grasping at her hair.

“And do you deny providing multiple serial killers with your illicit services?” He was all too pleased with himself when Faye looked up at him from her spot on the floor, looking lovely as ever with his soldier’s hand knitted tightly into her hair.

“I deny nothing,” Faye grunted when the soldier’s hand pulled back, whipping the back of her head into the metal pole behind her.

“And what do you propose your punishment be, hmm?” He asked.

“Just sentence me to death already you old codger,” Faye ordered.

“Very well,” Judge Orwell’s lips curled up into a maniacal smile, it was enough to make anyone who didn’t know him feel on edge, but Faye only let out a relieved sigh. “You’ll be sentenced to the next year working as the Scouting Regiment’s new medic. You’ll dedicate your heart to the cause, and give your life should Commander Erwin see fit,” He looked down again, giving a curt, satisfied nod. “Let’s see how you play when your life is in someone else's hands, Faye.”

*

“You couldn’t have asked the soldier to go a little easier?” Faye hissed, holding a warm towel to her scalp. “He nearly gave me a concussion, and for what? Your bizarre kink for seeing people battered in front of you?”

“It was worth it,” John Orwell smiled. “The sight of you glaring up at me in defiance-”

“Finish that sentence,” Faye dared in a dangerously low voice “Go on, I’ll wait.”

“It was hot,” John shrugged, sending a cheeky smile down at Faye who sat opposite to him at his desk. “Besides, Alexander said that the Commander wouldn’t force you to join, but it still gave me chills-” She was quick, and he’d only closed his eyes for a split second, but that was all Faye needed to lean over the desk and pull Orwell’s finger backward, hearing the familiar snap of the bone. “f*ck!” John cradled his newly broken finger to his chest, glaring at the culprit.

“I don’t enjoy being objectified, Mr. Orwell,” Faye sighed, pulling the towel back from her head to see it covered in diluted blood. “So unless you want another finger to join your broken one, I’d advise you to keep your opinions to yourself unless asked for them.”

“Amazing how quickly your attitude changes when you aren’t chained to a pole,” Orwell grumbled, keeping his disfigured finger against his chest as though it would help relieve the pain. “Perhaps you’ll get into more trouble, and I’ll need to choose your fate again,” When Faye didn’t reply, too busy gently prodding her scalp, he let out a low, predatorial hum. “Maybe you liked it more than you let on,” He suggested, “Maybe you get off on it all just like I do.”

“John, you’re really pushing your luck today,” The doctor growled, guts curling inwards while the word ‘ Violated ’ flashed in bright, neon lights inside Faye’s head.

“Come now, you can’t tell me you aren’t getting wet at the thought of-” The door slammed open, and in strolled Faye’s savior: Erwin Smith. John Orwell cut himself off immediately, hiding his finger and trying to give a cordial smile up.

“Judge Orwell,” Erwin greeted, noting how pale the man had just gotten. “I just came to pick up Doctor Jaeger,-”

“ Doctor Jaeger? ” Orwell co*cked his head in amusem*nt, eyes flitting over to where Faye was still sat, sending imaginary daggers through his head. “Is that another one of your kinks?” He wasn’t teasing Faye, he was genuinely curious, and his tone had Erwin stepping in to block Faye from Orwell’s prying eyes.

“I would appreciate it if you stopped degrading my newest captain,” Erwin took a threatening step forward, towering over the balding judge. As flattered as Faye was, she felt equally as uneasy.

“Captain?” Faye perked up from her seat, raising an eyebrow. “When did you decide this?”

“Last night,” Erwin replied, still staring down into John Orwell’s beady little eyes. “Just after our conversation. I’ll give you more details once Eren’s trial is over.”

Faye let out a nervous laugh, forcing her legs to comply and hop up while she grabbed onto Erwin’s arm, “Let’s go then,” She tugged gently, and he complied, allowing Faye to pull him toward the door, and away from the judge. “I already broke his finger, and I don’t want to push my luck with him quite yet,” She had leaned in to whisper it just as they passed through the doorway, and Judge Orwell watched Faye slip out of view, still clutching the towel to her head.

He leaned back for a moment, staring down at his finger and he heaved out a sigh. What a troublesome woman. He pursed his lips, grunting when he reset the bone with ease. He would need to send his messenger out to give word to Marley, he was certain Mr. Jaeger would be interested in the new developments of Faye Jaeger’s life, what with her recent promotion.

Meanwhile, Erwin had pulled Faye into a massive, empty dining room, sitting her down at a table and taking it upon himself to check the back of Faye’s head.

“There’s blood,” He murmured, brushing his fingertips over top some of the dried blood. “I didn’t realize it was that bad.”

Faye waved dismissively. “It’ll heal. It’s not deep enough to need stitches, and it’s already started clotting, so the bleeding should stop in a few minutes,” She could feel Erwin dabbing away at the new blood carefully, trying not to press too hard on the open skin. “So what’s this business about me being a captain?”

“You don’t want the position?” Erwin tilted his head, and Faye glanced backward just slightly at his surprised tone. “I would have thought you’d jump at the opportunity.”

“I don’t like being put in a position of authority over other people,” Faye mumbled out. “Too much responsibility and pressure to be a good role model, and what happens if their opinions or views don’t line up with mine?” She chewed her lip, swept under by her thoughts. “I can’t just order another person around like a dog-”

“They’re soldiers, Faye,” Erwin sighed, setting down the cloth and sitting down next to her. “They’ll lay down their lives if that’s what you order them to do.”

“I’m serious Erwin, I don’t want my own team,” She held a determined expression, and when Erwin made eye contact his lips settled into a fine line. “Give me an assistant, and we’ll teach everyone else what we can, but I refuse to hold someone else's life in my hands like that.”

“As opposed to holding their life when you’re treating them?” Erwin dryly inquired, carefully observing the doctor in front of him.

“Different feeling,” Faye insisted. “I’m doing what I can for them when I’m treating someone, not the other way around.”

Erwin gave a thoughtful hum, mulling over her words. “And your assistant?” He already knew, of course, but just to satiate the little part of him that liked hearing Faye talk, he still asked.

“Alexander.”

“He’s had no military training,” Erwin pointed out, just to see how adamant she was.

“Neither have I, but you’re willing to promote me to captain despite only officially being part of the regiment for an hour,” She pointed out in a huff, annoyance welling up. “If it’s about us not having any combative skills or experience using the gear, why don’t you have one of the cadets teach us?”

“That’s risky,” He leaned back, “They don’t have all that much experience on it either.”

“But they just graduated from training, which means it’s all still fresh in their heads.” She had a point, but Erwin was still apprehensive. They hadn’t even been on the field yet. “Besides, we really only need the basics, it’s not like Alexander or I are athletic enough to take down a titan, we just need to be able to make it to safety.”

“And which cadet did you have in mind?” Erwin questioned, his fingers drummed on the table, carefully considering her words.

“The one who came top of their class,” Faye grinned. “She’ll be joining the corps. I can assure you of that.” She was awfully confident, and the way the brunette grinned as she mentioned the cadet in mind had Erwin memorizing the scene to replay later in his head.

“I suppose that’s doable,” He started. “Are you still going to be able to find time for your other duties?”

“I have a pretty clear idea of what I need to get done,” Faye nodded. “But my idea of what I’d like to do might vary from yours, and since you’re The Commander, your word overrides mine,” The words tasted uncomfortable on her tongue. She hated working for other people’s agendas, even less if they had no respect for her.

“You know you have full autonomy, right?” He gave a quizzical look, his lips curving up in delight when her jaw slackened just slightly. “I’m the one who wanted you on the team, and your needs outweigh mine.”

“If that’s the case,” Faye hesitantly started. “Then I need this to be a partnership.” That wasn’t the answer he was looking for, but her words had him hooked, so he dipped his head, patiently waiting for her to continue. “I’m going to need you to trust me as much as I need to trust you, and that starts right here and now.”

“So what do you suggest?” He’d leaned forward, excited to hear what she had to say, and he found himself disappointed when she teetered backward, keeping their original distance.

“I’m going to be honest with you,” Her eyes had narrowed, and she sucked in a breath, trying to brace herself for the inevitable kickback. “I can’t tell you everything I know, but when the situation calls for it, I’ll spill it all.”

“Is there anything you can tell me?” Erwin’s smile deepened with interest while he watched Faye squirm under his intense gaze. The f*cker was intimidating, and the twisted smile he wore made Faye want to vomit.

“Yeah,” It came out reluctantly, and when her eyes flitted to meet Erwin’s, she held her breath. “Sometimes if I touch a person-” God, this was going to sound so stupid. “I’ll get little flashes of their lives. It doesn’t happen often, and I’m not claiming it’ll happen at all while I’m in your service, but if it does, I’ll report back to you.” She could at least do that much.

“Little flashes?” Erwin breathed, his fingers twitching, longing to reach out and brush his skin against hers just to see if she’d react.

Faye hummed, “They’re not all that clear or straightforward, sort of like a light flickering,” She didn’t really know how to describe it. “It all feels familiar, and-” Her breathing hitched, and her brows furrowed while she found herself remembering Eren Krueger from all those fateful years ago. Something about all Eldians being connected at a pathway.

“Yes?” Erwin snapped Faye out of her reverie, his eyes desperate and starving for Faye to continue in her plight to explain her bizarre ability.

“And like we’re all linked together,” She settled on, though it sounded vague and distant, and Erwin probably couldn’t make much sense out of it. “Anyway,” She forced the eroded memories from her head, trying to focus on the matter at hand. “Like I said, it only happens once in a blue moon. I can’t forcefully trigger it, and it’s only happened a handful of times.”

“May I?” His intrigue was burning a hole in his chest, and he hovered his hand just above Faye’s, his heart pounding in excitement. She gave a curt nod, and he laid his hand down, eyes trained on Faye’s expression, and his lips tugged down when she stared back at him with an apologetic smile. The Commander recovered rapidly from his disappointment, and he sent Faye a charming smile, one that was meant to dazzle her.

“I also wanted to inquire about the likelihood of you becoming my personal assistant,” He smoothly asked, mirth dancing in his eyes when she raised an eyebrow inquisitively, and Erwin found himself rushing to explain. “Nothing extensive, you’d be helping me with some paperwork and menial tasks.”

“Drop the assistant title, and call it a friend helping a friend,” Faye crossed her arms, grinning. “Besides, I’ll probably end up passing most of it off to Alexander, he likes hitting the books more than I do.”

It was all in the subtle microexpressions she had that Erwin picked up on. Playing with the hem of her shirt when she got shy, the lines near her eyes when she smiled, the curve of her lips when she was satisfied. And just as quickly as he’d noticed it, he discarded the thought.

“My thanks in advance,” Erwin smiled. “In the meantime, you should prepare yourself for Eren’s trial, and speak to Alexander about your proposition-”

“First of all,” Faye teasingly cut in. “It’s not a proposition if I’m the one asking. It’s more like a-” She paused, taking a second to think of the right word. “-A favor,” She settled.

“And if he refuses?”

“Then I guess I’m the one stuck helping you with your paperwork,” Faye quipped.

Chapter 11: 7. Eren's Trial and Petra's Realization

Chapter Text

Faye stood awkwardly between Levi and Erwin.

It was a courtroom similar to the one Faye had sat in earlier, though this one was grander and more immaculate. Even the wooden balconies had been carved to perfection, and there were more people attending Eren’s trial. A lot more people, including all of the military personnel. And while Erwin had promoted Faye to a captain, she felt like a child within an adult’s workplace, interfering during an important meeting

When she’d first stepped onto the balcony with Erwin and Levi, Nile Dok had glanced over, and his jaw slackened while he took Faye’s appearance in. Sure, her jaw was a little bruised as was her shoulder, but she should have been dead by now. And when he stared in shock, she tried to muster up a friendly smile, but the olive branch she attempted to extend seemed to snap in half, and the dark-haired man scowled at her like she was gum that’d gotten stuck to the bottom of his shoe.

“Don’t worry about him,” Levi muttered from beside her. “He always looks like he’s constipated.”

sh*t jokes, as Faye was coming to realize, were the only jokes Levi cracked every once in a blue moon.

Commander Erwin had given Faye a gentle, reassuring smile when she glanced up at him, but he hadn’t so much as glanced back at her since then. Levi had opted to ignore her completely afterward too, staring forward with sharp eyes and a tired frown. Had he taken his medication last night?

The doors below opened, and in came her little brother: Eren Jaeger.

Faye frowned, he was sweating, and his strides were short and uneven. She hadn’t gotten a good look at his face yet, but she could tell he was panicked. She watched Eren get shackled to a metal pole, and she bit her tongue to keep from scowling at the military police. Hours ago that had been her cuffed to the pole, and if she had only felt uncomfortable, Eren probably felt distressed and panicked.

An older, greying man strolled over to the podium, folding his coat neatly and taking a seat at the ornate chair front and center of the courthouse. Despite his obvious old age, the man kept himself in pretty good shape. He mumbled something out, Faye couldn’t quite hear, before he adjusted his glasses to peer down at a small pile of papers. He cleared his throat before beginning.

“Your name is Eren Jaeger, and as a soldier, you have sworn to give up your life when called to for the good of the people,” he stated. “Is that correct?” Faye tilted her head uneasily. She didn’t know the man, and he hadn’t shown a whole lot of emotion, making him difficult to read. It was the nonchalance that threw Faye for a loop, and when she narrowed her eyes to try and piece together his indifference, she came up blank.

Eren went still, nodding and confirming the judge’s words.

“As an enlisted soldier during a time of war, military doctrine demands your tribunal be held as a court-martial. As Commander of our armed forces, this matter is left to my discretion. Thus, I will decide whether you live or die.” The words sounded callous inside of Faye’s head, but maybe she’d just imagined it. “Any objections?”

Eren looked down to the ground, shaking his head. “No sir.” The words came out meek and small, the complete opposite of what Eren stood for. Faye had a few mindful words of her own to shout out, but she had half a mind to keep her lips sealed shut. She would only make the situation worse.

“Your astuteness is appreciated,” The Commander dully noted. “Let us proceed.” From across the room, Faye caught eyesight of Mike and Hange stepping onto a platform to watch the hearing. The scruffy squad leader looked deep in thought as his eyes drifted down toward Eren, not even batting an eye in her direction. “As expected, covering up your existence has proven quite fruitless,” Carried the Premier's voice. “And unless we publicly disclose your existence one way or another, we risk the outbreak of widespread civil unrest.” The crowd had all shifted uncomfortably at the Premier’s words, though he continued. “A choice must be made, and the regiment that takes custody of you will determine your fate. The Military Police, or the Scout Regiment?” Both parties held grim faces, but at least the Scout Regiment seemed to be trustworthy. Or, at least, Mike and Levi were. “The Military Police will now present their case.”

A familiar mop of black hair had stepped forwards, moving to stand in front of Eren and facing the crowd of onlookers.

“Thank you. My name is Nile Dok. I am Commander of the Military Police,” He introduced tightly. “Our recommendation, following a thorough examination of his physiology,” Faye flinched, they wanted to cut Eren open and examine his insides in an attempt to find what gives him the ability to shift into a titan. They had such primitive science though, there was no possibility they’d actually find what they were looking for, and his death would be in vain. “Subject Eren Jaeger should be disposed of immediately.” She felt her fists tighten in on themselves, the familiar stinging sensation on her palms as her nails drew blood.

“We acknowledge that Jaeger’s ability played a part in turning back the latest Titan Incursion, however, as has been stated, his mere existence is creating a swell of rebellious sentiment.” He was right, rumors had apparently begun to surface about Eren, and many weren’t happy with the news from what Levi had told her this morning. “For the greater good, after we have gathered all that we can from him, we would see him made a fallen warrior of humanity.”

Faye scoffed. What utter bullsh*t. He’d be seen as a menace to society, and many would thank the MPs for discarding a monster who threatened their lives. Nile Dok didn’t seem like a stupid man, Faye was certain of this, but he was obviously deluded if he really thought the masses would buy into that crap.

“Unacceptable!” A man shouted. “This verminous fiend has defiled the Mighty Wall...” It was a Wall Cultist. They must have gained recognition and popularity to have made it into this courtroom today, a stark contrast to their reputation when she had first been accepted into the walls as a child. They used to be looked down on last she remembered, but maybe the tides had shifted into their favor—which—in Faye’s eyes, wasn’t exactly a good thing.

The Premier turned his head in Faye’s direction, and her heart thrummed quickly. “And now I’d like to hear the Scout Regiment’s proposed plan,” He ordered, calmly clasping his hands together and waiting.

“Yes, Sir,” Erwin stepped forward, keeping his back straight and his face neutral. “As the Commander of the Survey Corps, I, Erwin Smith, propose the following:” His head shifted to glance over at Faye’s brother, half addressing him too. “Let Eren join our ranks. Reinstate him as a full member of the Scouts, and we will utilize his titan ability to retake Wall Maria. That is all.” It was a simple plan, sure, but something gnawed on Faye’s insides. Eren was still considered a risk.

The Premier leaned forwards, humming to himself. “Is that it?”

“Yes. With his assistance, sir, I’m certain we can reclaim Wall Maria. Ergo, I believe our top priority is perfectly clear.” Erwin stood resolute while the Commander’s eyes searched for any hesitance or uncertainty.

“Quite bold.” The greying man admitted. “Assuming you were given clearance, where do you plan to launch this operation from?” He asked, tightening his fists, and turning to look at a bald man. At least he was seriously considering the plan. “Commander Pyxis,” he addressed. “The wall in Trost District has been completely sealed, is that correct?”

Commander Pyxis nodded with a small, proud smile. “Yes, I doubt its gate will ever open again.” He acknowledged.

“We’ll depart from Calaneth District to the East. From there, we’ll make for Shiganshina,” Erwin replied dutifully. “A new route can be established as we proceed.”

“But that’s ridiculous!” Another man interjected, slamming his palms down on the railing. “Our time and money would be better spent sealing up all the gates,” He seemed a bit frantic as he stood up to his full height, clutching at the air in front of him. “They’re the only parts of the Wall that the Colossal Titan can break, right? Let’s reinforce the blasted things and wash our hands of the entire affair,” He reasoned

“Shut your mouth, you spineless merchant dog!” Shouted a man from behind Faye. “With a titan on our side, we can finally return to Wall Maria!”

“We can’t afford any more of your childish antics or your delusions of grandeur.” Another voice from across the room replied venomously.

“Squealing louder won’t help your case, pig,” Levi finally interrupted, ending the argument. “And while we’re bolstering our defenses, do you think the titans are going to stand idly by?” He raised his chin despite the venomous glares aimed at his forehead. “And when you say ‘We can’t afford,’ Do you speak for anyone other than your fat merchant friends? Do you pigs even realize that most of our people are struggling just to survive off what little land we have left?” Another question that hung in the air, letting it stew in everyone’s mind. “I’m simply saying that sealing the gates is the only guaranteed protection we’ve got.” His tone was calm and authoritative, and it made Faye tilt her head.

She’d never heard him shut down someone so methodically. Maybe it’s because he never had to while in her presence, but nonetheless, Faye was impressed. He was blunt about it all, but he’d delivered it all in a way that would make everyone consider his words.

“Hold your tongue, you belligerent heretic!” The Wall Cultist had made his way over to Levi, bending slightly and shoving his face closer to the Captains. Maybe Faye had spoken a little too quickly. “Are you really suggesting that we lowly humans meddle with Wall Rose, a gift to us from on high?” Levi scoffed as the cultist continued, “The Wall is a miracle, and its divinity transcends human comprehension.” His eyes had glazed over just slightly, and he frantically searched for some sort of understanding in Levi’s eyes, which only held disdain for the cultist in front of him.

Another man from across the room had begun to argue again, and within the minute, several voices had piped in, eager to share their two cents.

“Order, order,” The Premier bellowed, slapping his hand against the table a few times, gaining the courthouse’s attention. “I ask that you save your personal sentiments for a more appropriate venue,” He had worded it as a question, though from the stern look on his face, it was clearly an order. “Now then, Mr. Jaeger, I have a question for you,” His beady eyes trained on Eren, scrutinizing the boy who had been rather silent amidst his own hearing. “As a soldier, you have made a solemn pledge to answer humanity’s call,” He reminded. “Can you still serve by controlling your ability?”

“Yes!” Eren immediately answered, face growing serious. “I will, sir.” There was no hesitation, and Faye struggled to discern whether it was from fear of losing his life so prematurely, or if he truly believed in his words.

“Oh, is that so?” The Premier’s voice came, and it took a moment for Faye to register that he sounded somewhat condescending and derisive. “But this report from the Battle for Trost contradicts that statement,” He pointed out. “Just after transforming, it seems you made an attempt to crush Mikasa Ackerman.”

Faye felt her blood run cold as she nervously shifted her eyes to stare at her brother. Levi and Erwin had neglected to mention this incident… Eren would have never consciously laid a finger on Mikasa. At least, Faye hoped he wouldn’t.

“And who is this Mikasa Ackerman?” The Premier patiently inquired.

Mikasa stood bravely, speaking up. “Me. That would be me, Sir.”

“Alright then,” He acknowledged, glancing over his papers to inspect the fifteen-year-old. “Is it true that Eren Jaeger assaulted you while in titan form?” He bluntly asked. Faye had subconsciously grabbed onto her arm again, digging her nails into the skin anxiously.

“Yes,” Mikasa confirmed. “All of that’s true.” A cacophony of whispers and gasps sounded through the air while Faye felt the floor tilt beneath her. That was most certainly not the answer she was hoping for. She clenched her jaw when her eyes slid over to Eren, who looked just as shell-shocked as Faye felt. “However,” Mikasa’s voice rang out again, easily silencing the whispers. “He also saved my life twice before.” Faye’s shoulder slumped in relief just slightly while she continued to listen to Mikasa’s testimony. “And in each circ*mstance, he was using his titan ability.” This was good. He was at least somewhat lucid while in titan form. “The first: Shortly after Trost fell I was nearly killed by a titan, but then Eren came.” Another wave of whispers broke out, but Faye paid them no mind, desperate for Mikasa to continue. “He stepped in and protected me. The second time: He transformed to shield Armin and me from the cannon fire-” Faye’s face paled. Cannon fire? Her eyes slid to Erwin, why hadn’t he mentioned any cannon fire? That most definitely did not sound good. Why were those three being shot at with a cannon? “I implore you to take these facts into consideration-”

“Objection!” The Commander of the MP bellowed. “I have reason to believe that personal feelings play a large part in her testimony,” He accused hotly, refusing to lay his eyes on the teenager he was accusing. “Let the records show that Mikasa Ackerman was orphaned at a young age and was subsequently taken in by the Jaeger family,” Faye’s eyebrows furrowed. Even if her personal feelings were at play here, it seemed to Faye that Mikasa was telling the truth. “What’s more, our own internal investigation into this matter led to a most shocking discovery,” He lifted a few pieces of paper to his face, reading off the accounts. “Eren Jaeger and Mikasa Ackerman, at the tender age of nine,” Faye didn’t think it was possible for her stomach to sink any further, but she’d just been proven gravely mistaken. “Dealt with three adult kidnappers by stabbing all of them to death,” No. No, that account was wrong. Before Faye had the chance to object, Commander Nile had already continued. “Granted, this was done in self-defense. All the same, one cannot help but question the violent nature of the act. Knowing all of this, should we really invest in him? Money, manpower… Perhaps the very fate of us all?”

“Sir, that report is missing some key details,” Faye had spoken out of turn, and everyone’s eyes had slid over to scrutinize and assess her.

“Name and rank?” The Premier questioned, eyes narrowed at her lack of uniform.

“Faye Jaeger, the newest captain in the Scouting Regiment,” Faye replied, gripping tightly to the railing.

“What is your relationship to Eren Jaeger?” Premier Zachary asked.

“I’m his sister, sir. But my personal feelings have nothing to do with my statement,” Alright, so, that was a lie, but she wasn’t wrong when she said that report was missing details.

So when Premier Zachary considered Faye’s words for a moment and then dipped his head and said, “Proceed,” Faye’s hands suddenly went clammy and her mouth had gone dry.

“Objection!” Nile spoke up, his eyes piercing into Faye’s with unadulterated loathing. “Faye Jaeger had her own court date to attend today on the basis she was practicing medicine without a license and providing numerous drugs to criminals.”

Zachary’s brow raised just slightly in—well, Faye couldn’t quite tell. It wasn’t the same emotion Erwin sometimes showed when she did something that fascinated and drove his curiosity. If she had to guess, it would lean more towards astounded that she put herself in the limelight despite the serious accusations she was being charged with, but then his eyes slid over to Erwin, and her back stiffened.

“Commander Erwin,” The Premier addressed. “Is what Commander Nile Dok stated true?” Faye felt a twinge of annoyance, he could have just asked her and she would have given him an honest answer.

“Yes sir, Faye was previously considered an illicit doctor, having offered her services to criminals, but as of her hearing earlier, she was sentenced to a year in the Scouting Regiment, and I appointed her to the rank of Captain.” He wasn’t even sweating, and he seemed so calm and collected, Faye marveled at his level-headedness. “I can personally vouch for her unyielding honesty and ability to objectively speak about personal matters.”

Zachary seemed to at least consider what Erwin said, and after a thoughtful bout of silence, he nodded to Faye, signaling for her to continue—much to Nile’s chagrin.

“They were both acting on my orders,” She swallowed the lump in her throat, forcing herself to breathe. “The kidnappers were planning on selling Mikasa, and when my brother and I happened upon them, they were going to kill the both of us,” She could hear the murmurs rippling through everyone on the ground floor, all spectators, no doubt. “I urged Eren and Mikasa to fight back, so if there’s anyone to be at fault in this situation, it’s me,” She licked her lips when the Premier said nothing, and she took the opportunity to drive in her point just a tad more. “It was kill or be killed, and we weren’t left with any other choice. When you’re in mortal danger, your brain works on instincts and all three of us went into Self Preservation Mode,” Something twisted inside her stomach, and in horror, Faye wondered if it really was self-preservation or not. Maybe it was just plain murder. Was that the incident that started her killing spree? “I can assure you that the three of us regretted our actions deeply, and their deaths carried a heavy mental toll for years,” She blinked, and when Levi nudged her arm, she stuttered out, “Uh, Your Honour, sir.”

Eren had shifted to stare open-mouthed at his sister. She shouldn’t have been there. She was going to get herself killed. Why was she defending him like that? Everyone in this courthouse was bloodthirsty, they wanted to point fingers and kill someone. Didn’t she realize that? Why would she even bother opening her mouth?

The crowds had begun whispering again, pointing fingers at Eren and Faye, accusing them of horrendous deeds. The Commander seemed to have a thoughtful look as he stared at Faye, and the sincere look she outwardly wore.

A man pointed between Mikasa and Faye, “Maybe they’re one, maybe they’re not human either!”

“Yeah!” cried another. “Dissect all three of them!”

“They’re going to murder us all!”

“We’re really gonna listen to the words of a criminal?” Shouted another.

“I vote we kill the boy and the girls!”

“Now hold on a second!” Eren yelled, thrashing against the pole he was shackled to. “Maybe I’m a monster you all want dead, but leave them out of this,” He insisted, craning his neck to frantically look at all the faces in the crowd.

“Look! They must also be titans if he’s protecting them like that!” Accused another man.

“Stop it!” He cried, helplessly trying to lean forwards to stand, but to no avail. Though, he did manage to get everyone’s attention. “You’re wrong. About it all.” He blamed quietly, but stubbornly. “But you’re so intent on pushing selfish agendas, you’re blind to what’s in front of you,”

“Wait, what do you mean?” Commander Nile questioned intently.

“What does it even matter? None of you have ever seen a titan, so why are you so afraid, huh?” He pushed. “There’s no sense in having power if you’re not going to use it to fight. If you’re too scared to fight for your lives, fine, then let me do it,” He had started yelling again, glaring up at the crowds of useless cattle behind him. “You—You’re all cowards, just shut up, and put all your faith in me!” He ordered, passionately.

“Take aim, dammit!” Cried Nile to the soldier next to him.

“Right! Yes sir!”

Faye blinked. Levi had jumped over the railing at a breakneck speed, and snapped his leg forward, connecting it with Eren’s jaw. A tooth flew through the air while Eren’s neck snapped to the side from the blunt force.

“Holy sh*t,” Faye breathed, eyes wide. Levi swung his leg mercilessly again, this time connecting with Eren’s stomach. There was no remorse on his face as blood splattered onto the floor between the two.

Faye’s legs had moved instinctually, ready to pounce forwards and take the next thrashing for her brother, but Erwin tightly grasped onto her arm, effectively trapping her behind the railing, doomed to watch Levi grab onto Eren’s collar, and drag him forward by the neck before slamming his knee straight into Eren’s nose.

“Oh my God,” Her eyes were wild and frantic and she clutched onto Erwin’s arm desperately. “You need to let me go, he’s decimating my little brother,” Faye pleaded, flinching as she heard Eren’s grunts every time Levi landed a hit. Erwin shook his head in response, watching Faye’s eyes water. “That’s my baby brother, and he’s literally defenseless. I need to help him, let me go, dammit,” Her voice was slowly getting louder, and she began to try and lift Erwin’s hand off of her arm. He once again shook his head, pulling her in tightly to his chest and forcing a hand over her lips, muffling her protests and forcing her to watch Levi beat the sh*t out of Eren. She tried to look at the opposite side of the room at Mike for some sort of help, but her lips curled back in disgust at the small smile he wore. What part of this was amusing to Mike?

Eren’s head cracked painfully on the floor as Levi brought his foot down, planting it overtop the teenager’s skull to keep him from jostling around too much while he choked on his own blood. “You know, personally, I think nothing instills discipline like pain,” Levi’s voice carried through the room, echoing in Faye’s ears while she watched in horror. “You don’t need a good ‘Talking-to.’ What you’re in need of, boy, is to be taught a lesson,” He hadn’t once glanced up at Faye or Erwin, or even addressed the crowd. No. It was only him and Eren. “And you happen to be in perfect kicking position,” Faye flinched as Levi’s foot came rushing down, a strangled sound catching in her throat while he ruthlessly kicked Eren again, and again, and again-

“N-now hold on, Levi,” Nile tried, lifting a hand out, but not daring to step forwards, but stopping cold in his tracks when Levi addressed him cooly, lifting his boot from Eren’s face with an irritated scowl.

“What is it?”

“It’s dangerous,” Commander Nile admitted seriously. “What if he gets angry? Turns into a titan?”

Levi’s foot came crashing down, smashing Eren’s nose in again. “Don’t be silly,” He sighed, staring coldly down at Eren before seemingly making up his mind. He reached down and fisted a handful of Eren’s hair, pulling the boy up to his height to inspect his face closely. He was swollen and had already begun to bruise. His nose was most definitely broken, and blood had been smeared around savagely. “After all, you guys just want to dissect him, don’t you?” Stunned gasps sounded from the Military Police, and Erwin noted that Faye had finally frozen in place, Levi’s words sinking in and processing while she realized why he’d taken such violent, premeditated actions against her brother.

“During the time that he was transformed, they say Jaeger was able to kill twenty titans before he finally ran out of strength,” He’d glanced over at Commander Nile, but his gaze quickly flickered back to Eren, who’d sat pitifully in a heap below him. “As an enemy, his intelligence makes him all the more dangerous, but I could still take him down without a problem.” His eyes raked over the crowd, scrutinizing each and every one of them. “How many of you can say the same?” Everyone stood in silence while Erwin finally removed his hands from Faye, gently guiding her to rest behind him and away from prying eyes. “Before you torment the beast, you’d better think: Can you actually kill him?”

Erwin’s hand shot to the sky slowly. “Sir, I have a proposition,” he began, waiting for the Premier to nod, waiting for him to continue. Faye found herself scowling from behind Erwin. She started hating that word 'Proposition.’ “There’s still too much we don’t know, and no doubt, his danger will be ever-present,” He explained nobly. “As such, I suggest this: Eren Jaeger will be placed under Captain Levi’s supervision, and we’ll conduct a recon mission outside of the wall.”

The Premier listened thoughtfully for a heartbeat, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes at Erwin. The man's silence was nerve-wracking, sinking into Faye's bones like lead and filling her very being with unease. Premier Zachary didn't strike her as the type to let his sense of justice be swayed by others, yet, something in the depths of her souls cried out into the void, pleading with her not to trust his judgment so lightly.

“Jaeger will join you in the excursion?” He bluntly questioned, watching Erwin nod.

“Yes Sir. Then you can look upon the mission’s results yourself, and if he successfully controls his ability Eren will have proven his value to mankind.”

“Eren Jaeger will be closely supervised?” Premier Zachary once again questioned. “And if he should lose control?”

“I can definitely kill him if it comes to that,” Levi declared, finally turning away from Eren to look at The Premier. “The only downside is that there’s absolutely no middle ground.”

Zachary hummed, clasping his hands together. “Then I have made my choice,” He announced.

*

Hange sat next to Faye, both of them cleaning Eren’s face up with cotton balls doused in leftover isopropyl alcohol that Faye had packed for the Scouts. Eren flinched when Hange prodded at his face with a little too much enthusiasm, but Faye kept her comments to a minimum, stewing in her resentment.

“Well, that went better than I expected,” Came the admittance from Hange, watching Eren wince as they once again jabbed the cotton ball into the wound, and earned a scowl from Faye. “Does it hurt?” They morbidly asked, watching Eren nod. “Describe it to me,” They loudly ordered, leaning forward in anticipation.

Faye had enough of their rough handling though and instead nudged them away from Eren, moving to take a seat directly in front of her brother to finish disinfecting the cuts. There was no way Faye felt safe with Hange handling Eren like that. No, it was better if she finished the rest off. There were only a few cuts left anyway.

“Sorry about all that,” Erwin apologized, though Faye noted that he sounded apathetic. “But the theatrics did get you placed in our custody,” Another sour look graced Faye’s face as she glanced at Mike, who stood solemnly near the window. His smile kept replaying in Faye’s head, and as much as she understood that the performance was important, she hated every second of it. Eren nodded in understanding, accepting the commander’s apology. “I can assure you the pain was worth it,” He voiced, moving to stand just behind Faye, who quietly snorted while she moved to the side, finally finished and satisfied with her handiwork. She watched Erwin squat down, resting on the balls of his feet “We played our trump card at the perfect time, you have my utmost respect.” He’d reached a hand out with a small, proud smile, shaking her baby brother’s hand. “Eren, I’m glad that you’re on our team.” Faye watched her brother flush, surprise glazing over his face.

“Uh!” He stuttered, quickly shaking his Commander’s hand. “Me too, glad to be here, sir!”

Faye bit her tongue to keep from scowling when Levi took a few long strides and sat down on the couch beside Eren, roughly slamming his hand down next to Eren’s head to rest on the framing while he crossed his legs lazily, taking up more than half the couch despite his short stature.

“So, Eren,” Levi acknowledged, listening to Eren nervously greet his captain. “You don’t resent me now, do you?” Faye pursed her lips. Of course he didn’t. He was too nice to harbor any ill feelings for the man who’d beaten him bloody.

“No. I can see that what you did was necessary, Sir,” Eren stumbled over his words, glancing shyly up at Levi before averting his gaze quickly, while Levi gave an appreciative nod.

“Good.” The Captain sighed. “Then you understand.”

“Still, don’t you think you went too far?” Hange inquired, slowly moving to stand closer to the small group. “I mean, you knocked his tooth out,” Faye’s stomach turned uncomfortably as they’d flung a hand open to reveal Eren’s missing tooth sitting on a small cloth. “Neat, huh?” They proudly asked, gazing down at the tooth with admiration.

“You picked it up? How disgusting.” Levi’s lip had curled back in revulsion.

“This is a precious sample, I’ll have you know!” They defended, closing their hand around the cloth and tooth, carefully pocketing it away for later. Yes, Hange Zoe definitely fit the description the crowds murmured, all repeating the same thing: They were a mad scientist who was obsessed with experimenting on titans.

“Hey,” Levi called for Eren’s attention, jutting his chin towards his comrade. “Just be glad people like that aren’t dissecting you.”

“Don’t you dare compare me with them,” Hange darkly warned. “I would never even dream of killing him.” Faye had begun to quietly step backward, intending to leave the group to their own devices. “Hey Eren,” Hange began, “Let me take a look inside that mouth of yours.” Faye smiled when she heard Eren hesitate, opening his mouth up like he used to as a child while saying ‘Ah’

She had grasped the door, swiftly pulling it open and moving past the threshold, eager to find some peace and quiet away from Levi and Erwin. Faye’s displeasure would dissipate on its own in a few hours, but for the time being, she just needed a minute alone to catch her breath. Tea. She wanted a searing hot cup of tea.

The door behind her swung open, and Faye’s body twitched, eager to jump behind a box and hide from whichever captain had come to seek her out, and her muscles pulled into action at a blinding speed, carrying her just out of view when the door opened and out stepped Erwin and Levi.

“Where do you think she went?” It was Levi, and Faye could just imagine the deep frown he was sporting.

“Perhaps she ventured off to find Alexander,” Erwin suggested. “You head that way and I’ll check the dining hall, she’s bound to turn up sooner or later.”

Of course they would be in a rush to find her. Three days of solitary confinement was fine, but the moment she joins the regiment they’re breathing down her neck.

The footsteps dissolved with the distance, and when Faye peeked her head out the crate, she let out a heavy sigh. They were finally gone, and she could finally have a few minutes to herself. She wasn’t really sure where she was headed, just that she needed somewhere private and quiet where no one would interrupt her solace.

Just as she rounded a corner, a door opened, and Faye was yanked inside faster than she could process. A hand slid over her mouth, and she was pinned to the wall. Cold blue eyes met hers, and Kenny cracked a grin.

“That was a close one, even for you,” He chuckled. “I was kind of hopin’ you’d be executed, would have made a fun show.” Slowly, he let his hand drop from her mouth, and he took himself off her.

“I haven’t seen you since Shiganshina fell,” Faye started, glad at the distance Kenny gave her. “If you’re looking for goods, you’re sh*t out of luck,” She kept her back against the wall, carefully taking in Kenny’s older appearance. When she was a teenager he always looked so much younger, but now it seemed as though time had finally caught up with him. Wrinkles creased his skin, near his mouth and eyes, and the fedora that once gave him the illusion of being slightly more wealthy than he was now looked outdated and bizarre.

“I’m not quite in that life anymore, kid,” Kenny shrugged. “I heard you’d be in town and I wanted to check up on my favorite doc’.”

“Well, you’ve seen me, greeted me, I think it’s time for me to take my leave,” Faye announced, reaching for the doorknob, but Kenny was quicker—he was always quicker—and he blocked the doorway, towering over Faye menacingly. “Alright,” She muttered out in annoyance. “Cut to the chase already, I have an empty room I want to cry in, and you’re taking up my alone time.”

“Long day?” He cracked another smile, and when Faye didn’t return the amused sentiment, he heaved out a dramatic sigh. “I’m just curious, you could have given information about me during your trial for a lesser sentence, so why didn’t you?”

“Patient confidentiality,” Faye snorted. “I may not have a license, but I do adhere to most of the rules.”

Kenny squinted, trying to discern whether she was being serious or not, and when she showed no signs of screwing with him, he grinned again, clapping his hand overtop Faye’s bruised shoulder.

“Look at that,” He chuckled. “A runt with a sense of duty,” If he saw Faye flinch when his hand made contact with the bruise, he paid no mind.

“Hey, Kenny," She hesitated, inflating her lungs with a long inhale of oxygen. The medic wasn't entirely sure it was even worth mentioning, but her moral compass wouldn't allow her any rest if she chose not to. "I might tell Erwin about our deal, or, well, I guess 'former deal' would be more accurate. I can’t operate with him if I don’t have his full trust,” she wearily eyed Kenny. He was a loose cannon, and Faye didn’t trust him any more than she could throw him.

“That so?” His head tilted, “Well, let me return the favor. John Orwell.” What did Judge Orwell have to do with anything? “He was talking to some kind of messenger earlier,” His eyes searched hers, “He said something about a Zeke Jaeger?” He watched her spine stiffen and her eyes widen just slightly. “But the thing is," His grin deepened, canines peeking out from behind his lips as he narrowed his eyes. He was practically buzzing with excitement, and the sudden shift in the atmosphere had the hair on Faye's nape tingling. "I did some digging, and there aren’t any records in any of the walls of a man named Zeke Jaeger.”

“You’re sure he didn’t say Eren Jaeger?” Faye asked, her eyes were distant, and she looked like she was in deep thought.

“Mentioned him too,” Kenny shrugged.

“I, uh-” She was stuttering, and her world was slowly tilting on its axis. “I don’t have any more information to give you for this,” She felt the color drain from her face, and her legs felt wobbly.

“All in due time,” Kenny dismissed, lips turning down. “You should take a seat, you look like you’re going to be sick.” His hand gently gripped Faye’s elbow, and he guided her over to the couch in the room. “I don’t know who Zeke Jaeger is, but he sounds dangerous,” He watched Faye shutter in a breath, nodding numbly. “You gonna be okay, or am I going to be burying your ass under a sh*tty tree?”

“I don't know, are you going to at least look for the prettiest tree in the walls?"

Kenny snorted, "You think I have the time for that? Hire a landscaper if you plan to die and shove that responsibility on some other f*cker."

“Thanks for letting me know," She forced in a breath, trying not to look as lightheaded as she felt. "I—that was really important information, you have no idea.” Faye let a heartbeat pass, swallowing as she looked into Kenny's eyes. “You—in the trial—” Her head was spinning faster than a horse could run, and she couldn’t even form a proper sentence. “Did you plant evidence at my shop for the MPs to find?”

“If I wanted you gone, I’d have done it myself, kid,” Kenny pointed out thoughtlessly.

“sh*t—yeah. You’re right,” Faye breathed. “Do you?” It was a stupid question, but she most certainly was not in her right mind.

“Want you gone?” He bellowed out a laugh. “I like checking in on you from time to time, just don’t piss me off or get into any trouble, and you and I won’t have a damn problem.” Faye was a cute kid, reminded him of Levi too much, and during his monthly visits all those years ago, he’d grown a soft spot for the illicit doctor.

“Thank you, Kenny,” Her eyes shifted to meet his in earnest, and for a split second, it felt like they were peering into each other's souls. “I mean it, you didn’t have to tell me sh*t, and you went out of your way—”

“Alright, stop babbling like that, sheesh,” Kenny ordered, spinning on his heel. “I just came to tell you what I heard. You can expect word from me in the next year or two to collect on your debt.” He didn’t wait for a response, and he walked in long strides right out the door.

John Orwell. Alexander. Uncle. Orwell was Alexander’s uncle. Was Al' in on it? What even was it? How did Orwell even know Zeke? Why Zeke of all people? She hadn’t seen him in eighteen years, so what was his end game in all of this?

She ran through the questions on the couch, clutching her head while it throbbed. This was bullsh*t. She wasn’t supposed to ever hear his name again. So what the hell was he doing with informants within the Walls?

Faye stayed on the couch for a long time—maybe two or three hours just staring down at her hands, contemplating the day and all the new information. It was a lot. More than a lot. And before she knew it, there were tears streaming down her face.

Hot, angry, frustrated tears. It was like every bad thing was rushing into her all at once. Her parents, watching her mother get turned into a titan, wandering around Paradis for months, not knowing if she was going to make it through to the morning, the brothel, the torture, the betrayal, everything.

After a while, Faye felt herself going numb inside, and her tears dried, and she slowly pulled herself together, enough to shift on the couch and take a much-needed nap.

*

Levi stared down at the sleeping medic. She’d been missing for five hours, and Erwin had started panicking an hour into the search for her, but all this time, she’d been napping in a room he had personally searched. The cheeky little criminal…

“Oi,” He nudged her shoulder, “Wake up br—” He cut himself off. Something about calling Faye a brat rubbed him the wrong way, so he settled on omitting the word when in her presence. “Come on, wake the f*ck up, you sh*tty doctor.” He shook her shoulder with a little more vigor, and his lips twitched when she let out a groan.

“I thought I was the best doctor in the walls,” She was half asleep, but her sarcasm knew no bounds.

“Remains to be seen,” Levi quipped, shaking her shoulder yet again. “Come on, Erwin is sh*tting himself right now because he doesn’t know where you are.”

“Tell him to find a toilet.”

“I’ll get the water bucket,” He threatened lowly, keeping the smile out of his voice.

“Stop stalling and cut to the chase,” It came out muffled, half of her mouth was smushed up against the armrest of the couch, and she made no move to get up as per Levi’s request. “I’m emotionally drained and I’m tired, so either carry me or get out.”

Levi narrowed his eyes at Faye. “Get on my back,” He ordered, turning around and kneeling. She obliged, wrapping her arms and legs around his body lazily, but she was still pretty out of it, and when he nudged the door open with his foot, he felt the even rise and fall of her chest, and Faye’s breaths tickled his neck. She’d fallen asleep not thirty seconds in.

When he made his way down the corridor, and he gently maneuvered the woman on his back to open Erwin’s door, she stirred just slightly, muttering something out in her sleep, though it was unintelligible.

“Where was she?” Erwin whispered, wide eyes trained on his newest and most prized captain. “She’s been gone for the last five hours, where the hell was she hiding away?”

“First room I checked. Must’ve snuck in there after I sweeped it,” Levi muttered, kneeling down next to Erwin’s couch and gently shifting Faye onto it. It looked instinctual, the way Faye’s legs came up to meet her chest on the couch while she turned on her side, perfectly content to nap the hours away.

Erwin’s shoulders eased only slightly when he took in the sight of his medic sleeping on his couch, relief flooded his bones at finally having located her. As worried as he had been, he couldn’t exactly blame the woman for needing some time alone, and thus whatever anger he might've felt dissipated.

“You think she knew about Eren?” Levi questioned, taking a seat in the chair closest to Faye, but opposite to Erwin who sat at the other end of his desk.

“Undoubtedly,” The Commander confirmed, his eyes had gone from soft to serious in a matter of seconds. “She knows what's in the basem*nt as well, so it’s only a matter of extracting the information.”

Levi tsked, clicking his tongue. “Ask her about it,” It was a bland suggestion, clearly suggesting that Levi wasn't in the mood for any of Erwin’s manipulative plans.

“Where’s the fun in that?” The Commander’s eyes shone in amusem*nt, and if Levi hadn’t known the man for upwards of five years, he would have thought he was making a joke. “I’d rather coax it out of her, have her trust us—”

“You,” Levi cut in with a scowl. “Have her trust you. I want nothing to do with your schemes.”

Erwin let out a thoughtful hum, one that vibrated in his chest. “I suppose it doesn’t hurt to be straightforward,” He kept the rejection out of his voice with a practiced mask.

“Erwin, I mean it,” Levi warned icily. “She’s not like the rest that you can order around—she’s too smart and she’ll see right through you.” He couldn’t tell if Levi was saying it for his sake, or for Faye’s. “If she doesn’t want to bring it up, don’t push your sh*tty luck, she’ll tell you when she’s ready.”

The blond’s thick brows raised in surprise. It was usually the other way around, where the commander would be the one telling Levi how to navigate a social situation, how to speak to someone, get them to open up within a few minutes. This was practically unheard of though, and his interest was most certainly piqued.

“I have some news I think you’ll appreciate knowing,” Erwin’s lips formed around his words, a coy curve on his lips.

“Don’t waste my f*cking time,” Levi cut in impatiently.

“Last night I went to speak with Faye,” He knew he had no obligation to tell Levi, though it stemmed somewhere between respect for the short captain and morbid curiosity. “I knocked, and when she didn’t answer I opened the door to find Petra’s fist inches away from Faye’s nose.” Levi’s jaw clenched, the vein in his neck jutting out just slightly—a telltale sign he was annoyed, as Erwin had come to know. “I could hear Petra through the door, blaming Faye for her mother’s death.”

“She’s an idiot if she really believes Faye would purposefully allow an innocent bystander to die,” Levi apathetically stated. “I’ll put her on stable duty for our time at the castle.”

Air shot out of Erwin’s nose as he breathed out a small chuckle. “Faye has requested we refrain from punishing Petra,” He informed, clasping his hands together while he let out a sigh. “Apparently Faye agrees with her.”

Levi’s eyes narrowed, and he craned his neck to glance over at the sleeping doctor.

“I’ll have a talk with Petra then,” He decided, already standing from the chair. “Make sure Faye eats before you let her out of your sight.” He kept it curt, and he spun on his heel to exit Erwin’s temporary office.

Levi had already been in a sour mood to begin with, having had to put on a spectacle during Eren’s trial, but the recent development between Faye and Petra made him beyond uncomfortable.

The first time he’d witnessed Petra and Faye interact, his squad member had nearly broken the doctor’s nose. Of course, Petra had a breakdown just outside the tea shop where she’d sobbed to Levi about Alexander and how Faye had taken over her role as his sister. That had been something Levi could excuse, understanding her reasoning which had only been human instinct, and her fever hadn't exactly been any help to Petra in making thought-out decisions, but the situation had shifted, and Faye was no longer just a civilian—no—Erwin had dragged the illicit doctor into the military just as he’d done to Levi.

He knocked on Petra’s door with the back of his knuckles, his lips pulled thin while he leaned on the balls of his feet.

“Captain?” He watched Petra’s brows furrow, and she stepped aside, granting him access to her quarters.

“Erwin informed me of the recent developments between you and Doctor Jaeger,” He kept it neutral, keeping himself next to the door. “Whatever sh*tty squabbles the two of you have, need to end tonight. She’s been appointed a captain, and—” Petra’s lips pulled into a frown, blatantly unhappy. “—Regardless of your feelings, she’s your superior and you need to respect her.”

“Captain, with all due respect,” Petra started, anger boiling just beneath the surface. “Doctor Jaeger is responsible for my mother’s death, and—”

“I’m not asking for your life story,” Levi reminded. “I’m ordering you to make peace with Faye—for your sake and hers.”

Alexander’s head peeked out from the washroom, listening with his undivided attention.

“Captain, I really don’t think—” Petra tried.

“I’m ordering you,” It was in the way he lowly muttered out the words that made Petra’s breath hitch. He said it like it was the last thing he wanted to do, and the soft, pleading look he gave her made the soldier’s heart skip a beat. “Faye has specifically requested we not punish you for insubordination—” Just like that, whatever well-meaning words her captain had said were thrown out the window.

“I’d rather the punishment, sir,” She briskly replied. “I have no desire to make friends with my mother’s killer.”

“Petra!” Alexander hissed, his long legs closing the distance quickly while he grabbed onto his sister’s arm to spin her around. “Why would you say that? Faye loved mom, she’d never purposefully push mom into a titans mouth.”

“Petra, I’ve given you your orders,” Levi cut in tiredly. “I’ll be off now.” He was too quick for Petra to stop, and he left the room before she could object.

“Why would you do that?” Petra’s foot stomped on the ground while she wrenched her arm out of Alexander’s grasp. “What’s so special about Faye anyways? Huh? She killed our mom, Alex, and you’re still acting like she’s some kind of saint.”

“She didn’t kill mom,” Alexander’s voice had raised an octave, and he ran a hand through his hair frustratedly. “And if she did, it wasn’t on purpose, why is that so hard for you to understand?”

“Then why is she still here, and mom is dead?” Petra’s voice cracked, and she turned away to save her dignity.

“I don’t know,” Alex quietly admitted, his shoulders slumping. “Just before the wall gave way, mom said some really nasty things about Faye, and I think—I think she was angry enough to try and pull a suicide mission to try and kill Faye.”

“What?” Petra spun to regard her brother with wide, bloodshot eyes. “Mom wasn’t suicidal, why would you even—”

“Your supposed marriage was on the line,” His throat was dry, and the words grated against his esophagus. “She probably thought that if she got Faye out of the way, Captain Levi would finally propose.”

Petra’s world had teetered on its axis, and her legs gave way, sending her knees to the floor.

“No—” She murmured, the words distant and foggy. “You—you’ve got it all wrong. This was done on purpose,” Vaguely, Petra could feel her mouth starting to salivate while her stomach lurched. “Faye—she’s a serial killer—she—she murdered mom on purpose.”

“Petra.” Alexander kneeled beside his sister, gently rubbing her back. “Faye has done so much for our family, you have no clue,” He watched with sympathy as tears welled in his sister’s eyes. “She’s saved us—me. She saved me, and mom, and dad,” His voice cracked, and his throat constricted. “She wouldn’t—Faye wouldn’t—” He couldn’t even bring himself to speak the words.

“Oh my god,” Petra’s breathing had picked up, and her stomach gave way as the contents of her stomach spewed past her lips onto the hardwood floor. Her torso bent in half, and her head bounced against the hardwood floors.

Numb. Petra felt absolutely numb. She’s killed her own mother. It had never been Faye’s fault, it had been hers all along. She hadn’t heard Alexander scramble out of the room, all she could focus on was the smoldering guilt setting the pit of her stomach on fire.

Faye’s once tired eyes surveyed the sh*t show in front of her. Petra had fallen into her own vomit, but her eyes were wide with an emotion Faye knew a little too well.

“Hey,” She kept her tone soft while she gently pulled Petra away from the floor. “Let’s get you into a bath, okay?” She looked back at Alexander, who stood by the doorway looking absolutely petrified. “Help me get her to the bathroom,” She ordered, looping a hand around Petra’s torso.

“What’s wrong with her?” Al' whispered, mirroring Faye and heaving his sister up.

“She’s having a panic attack or something, just help me get her into the bathtub,” Their steps were slow. “Petra, listen to me, whatever is going through your head—it’s probably not as bad as you think it is.”

“It’s all my fault,” Petra murmured out into the open air. “It’s all—”

“We’ve been over this,” The doctor’s tone was eerily empathetic, chilling Petra’s bones as they stepped foot into the washroom. Pure, unadulterated guilt was seizing her heart, and her stomach's unease only worsened the longer she was subjected to Faye's presence. “It’s my fault. I’m the one to blame.” Faye didn’t miss the dirty look Alexander shot over Petra’s head, but she ignored it.

Alexander laid her down in the tub, and Faye waved him away, ordering him to close the door on the way out.

“I know I’m not your favorite person at the moment,” She settled Petra in, undoing the top button of her shirt before she started the water, making sure it was warm. “But I think you shouldn’t be alone right now. I won’t even look at you, but I’ll be over by the sink if you do want to talk.”

“Yeah,” Petra shuddered out a breath, feeling the water encapsulate her being.

Neither spoke, choosing to bask in the presence of the other, silently whittling the hours away. Every so often. Faye would drain some of the water out before adding more in to keep the temperature from dropping. After three long hours, she quietly left the bathroom before coming back with some clean pajamas, setting them on the counter, and gently ordering Petra to get changed.

“Al’,” Faye called, shutting the bathroom door to give the soldier some privacy. “Listen, I’ve been appointed captain, are you coming with me?” She had forgone whatever social grace she had, the exhaustion hitting her like a freight train.

“Like—enrolling in the Scout Regiment?” Alexander squinted at his best friend, trying to discern whether or not she was being serious. “I’m not going through the training, I’ve heard rumors about the guy in charge—”

“Mr. Shadis is actually a very nice man,” Faye cut in. “But no, you would be accepted immediately and you’d be appointed my lieutenant as second in command of the Medical Branch.” She wasn’t really sure if that’s what her squad—or lack thereof—would be called, but it made sense.

“I—well,” Alexander sputtered, trying to think of a response. “Yeah, that’s—wow, alright. Sure,” He stammered. “Not like I have anything better to do.” He’d follow Faye to the ends of the Earth if only to make sure she was safe.

“Alright, when Petra gets out make sure she eats something and drinks some water,” Faye ordered, flawlessly stepping into her new position as his boss. “Check the cupboards for chamomile tea and brew some if she can’t sleep, I need to go let Erwin know you’re coming with us tomorrow.”

“Aye aye, Captain,” Alexander sent up a sarcastic salute, watching as Faye made her way out of his and Petra’s room.

Chapter 12: 8. Trust

Chapter Text

The sun shone down overhead, leaving speckled patches along the pathway to be bathed in light while the trees provided protection from the sun, giving way for cool shadows to be trailed along during particularly bright days.

A short brunette rode alongside a tall blond, chatting softly on their way to the Special Operation Squad’s base where the newest captain would be taking up residence for the next month. They left an hour after Levi, deciding to let his squad get a head start on cleaning out the musty castle and to give them some much-needed privacy, away from prying eyes and curious ears.

“You should feel flattered that Levi thinks so highly of your cleaning skills,” Erwin chuckled, “He tried to argue that you clean better than his whole squad combined.”

“I just scrubbed everything down because I had a lot of patients coming in and out all the time,” Faye mumbled back, her ears burning in embarrassment. “Everything had to be sanitary, which meant it needed to be cleaned every day.”

Erwin Smith had been making small talk with the doctor for the last hour, asking her about the weather and other menial subjects in which neither of them really cared about, and his throat had been burning to ask her more personal questions.

“I was quite surprised when you sent Alexander with Levi’s squad,” He voiced, tactfully changing the subject.

“I think Petra needs him right now,” She shrugged.

“I see,” Erwin's chest vibrated as he hummed. “What exactly happened last night when Alexander pulled you away, he seemed panicked.” He didn’t miss the way Faye’s lips pursed, nor the tightened hold on her horse's reins.

“I think she was forced out of the first stage of grief, and whatever denial she held withered away a little too soon for her to grapple with,” She said it slowly, mulling the words over in her head while they spilled from her lips. “It’s not really my place to say though.”

“Do you know a lot about grief?” Erwin inquired, his horse subconsciously moving closer to Faye’s.

The medic swallowed, chewing her lip. Of course she did. Better than most anyone else she knew, but the sarcastic retort died in her throat the longer she thought about it. Perhaps now wasn't the time to try and make a joke out of it all.

“Yeah,” Faye breathed, her head bobbing up and down. “My parents are both gone, and I’ve killed more people than I can heal.” Guilt seized her heart, and she took in a breath, though it caught on her throat.

“I thought your father was missing?” Erwin’s brow raised, his mind teetering over the files he’d read during the week.

“He’s dead,” Faye softly murmured, staring down the pathway in an attempt to evade The Commander’s inquisitive eyes. “He died the night Shiganshina fell.” Grisha’s eyes flashed in her mind, the desperate, penitent glimmer he looked at her with. “It was suicide.” Despite having five years to come to terms with her father’s death, her heart still contracted at the words, and she felt her throat closing in on itself.

“And your mother?” The words had slipped past his throat into the open air, and Erwin mentally scolded himself for being so inconsiderate.

Faye hesitated, shoulders slumping down into a pitiful mess. “It’s complicated.” She settled on. “She’s either wandering around in a mindless haze or was put out of her misery and laid to rest.” She let a heartbeat pass before she thoughtfully added, “The only thing I have left of her is her wedding ring, but I guess that’s in Levi’s possession right now.”

“He seems very fond of it,” Erwin commented. “When we embarked on our fifty-sixth expedition, he made certain to attach some twine to keep it around his neck.”

“Yeah, I saw that,” She sent up a weak smile, her heart still reeling from talking so openly about her parents.

Erwin’s lips tugged down into a frown at the melancholic woman beside him. Their conversation had been perfectly cordial and lighthearted until he asked about her parents, which must have hit a depressive chord inside her.

“My mother died of a broken heart shortly after my father passed,” He offered, needing something to quell the disquietude brewing in the pit of his stomach. It wasn’t often he found himself lost in social conversations, but Faye was a special case. "I often blame myself for both their deaths."

“That’s awful,” She acknowledged, her eyes sliding to her side to watch Erwin’s adam’s apple bob. “Must have been lonely for you.” She wouldn't pry and ask him questions, she would probably accidentally open old wounds which ran deeper than skin—a cut she wouldn't be able to heal.

“Are you saying that because that’s how it was for you?” He questioned, disappointed at how easily she seemed to understand him. She picked him apart faster than Levi did, and the thought unsettled Erwin greatly.

Faye hummed, leaning forward on her horse to slouch. “It felt like I was the only one left to deal with all of their secrets,” She earnestly admitted. “I was only seven when I got separated from my mom, and my dad—” She shuttered in a shallow breath, holding it until her lungs burned. “I try not to think too hard about him. Too much grief and—” She cringed inwardly, hating herself for admitting it out loud. “—I’m still not over his death yet.”

“You seem to be holding onto a lot of secrets,” Erwin slowly started, shifting atop his horse uncomfortably. It made his knees weak at how well she seemed to empathize with him. “If you’d like, I’ll listen to whatever you have to offer.”

Faye felt her shoulders tense, and she clenched her jaw, trying to discern what she could and couldn’t say. Whatever sorrow she once held had dissipated and morphed into weariness and guilt, which smothered her.

“Listen,” She forced an exhale out, letting her lungs deflate, and her diaphragm contract upwards. “I know you’re curious, and you want to know more, but I can’t give you all the answers yet, I’m...” How could she even explain the dread or the weight of it all? “I need something to get the ball rolling—just so I don’t feel insane when I can finally get it all off my chest.”

“I’d like to get to know you .” Erwin pressed, though it came out quietly. “Not your secrets.”

“I hardly think that's—” ‘I hardly think that’s appropriate,’ Is what Faye had started to say, but the words died in her throat when her eyes met with Erwin's, and within a moment she was plunged into a chilling abyss, where the only sentiments she could make out weren’t even hers to begin with. She was swept under by the raw emotions her commander held in his eyes, ones that reflected her image in blistering accuracy.

“Please,” Erwin whispered out. He was subconsciously gripping tightly to his reins—as though his existence depended on it, and he was all too aware of how vulnerable he looked in Faye’s eyes.

“Fine,” She relented, keeping her eyes on his. “Ask away, and I’ll answer with what I can.” That was the best she could offer, her world was still spinning at a breakneck pace, and the trees all seemed to ominously loom overhead.

“Levi said you made his arm go numb the day you scaled out of your shop,” Faye’s lips twitched, her heart slowly just slightly at the memory. Things seemed so much easier back then. “Did you have any previous fighting experience?”

“A bit,” Faye conceded. “I hit a pressure point, it’s called the brachial plexus.” She pulled that same stunt on a number of people over the years, and it had become a reflex. “I—” She bit her lip, averting her eyes for just a heartbeat. “I’m really good with a rifle too. You’d be surprised at how sharp my aim is—though I’d need a few minutes to get back into the swing of it.” She exhaled, meeting Erwin’s surprised eyes. "And I've got a bit of experience with a knife. One of my more violent customers taught me when he was low on money."

“Your file said you were found outside the walls when you were seven,” His lips had tugged up into an off-putting smile that made Faye’s stomach involuntarily twist. “Do you have experience fending off titans?”

“I think anyone who ventures outside the walls would be considered a miracle to have not encountered a titan,” Faye dryly replied, an ironic tilt on her lips despite her hammering heart. “I’ve taken a few down, but it’s been eighteen years, and I’ve probably gotten rusty.”

“I see your sarcasm is just as sharp as ever,” Erwin quipped, trying to lighten the dour atmosphere. It was suffocating him, and he wasn’t sure he could stand watching Faye frown so deeply for much longer. “Did you know about Eren’s titan ability?”

“Yeah,” She bluntly confirmed, slackening her hold on the reins. “He’s got no clue though, and I don’t know much about it.” She swallowed thickly, chewing her lip. “Just that he’s stuck with it, and I think it’s safe to assume he’s not the only one.” There, she said plenty without actually revealing anything, and Erwin could do whatever he wanted with that information.

“And yesterday?” He questioned. “You were gone for five hours before Levi located you, where did you disappear?”

Faye let out a nervous laugh, scratching her cheek. “I jumped into a box to avoid you guys,” She smiled a bit at the amused tilt Erwin wore. “I just needed some alone time, that’s all.”

“That’s the second time you’ve taken a rather drastic measure just to avoid me,” Erwin’s lips curved up in a teasing smirk. “Should I assume I’ve done something to land myself in your bad graces?”

In the blink of an eye, the tense atmosphere dispersed immediately, and Faye grinned up at him. “Absolutely,” She quipped, leaning back and straightening her shoulders, “I expect flowers and tea every week to make up for your never-ending questions.”

The blond barked out a laugh—one Faye had never heard before, but it made her heart flutter, and she couldn’t help the genuine smile she wore. She felt some of the pressure in her chest alleviate, and she let out an easy breath.

“I can have that arranged,” He chuckled, “Though I think Levi’s squad might question it, they’re very cautious.”

“Yeah?” Faye asked. “Can you tell me a bit about them? I haven’t met any of them except for Petra,” There was an inkling of insecurity welling up in Faye’s bones, and suddenly, she found herself weary, willing to camp out for the remainder of the day if only to avoid meeting The Special Operations Squad. “And despite being best friends with her brother, I know next to nothing about her.”

Erwin tilted his head, swiftly debating his next words with an entertained smirk.

“I’ve heard that Petra wishes for Levi to propose, do you think he will?”

His words made Faye tilt her head up to look at him, a blank look on her face.

“Erwin,” She started. “Do you—” The thought was ridiculous, but Faye couldn’t resist. “Do you enjoy hearing the gossip?” Her lips had quirked up into an ironic smile when the commander cleared his throat, averting his gaze to watch the pathway.

“It’s interesting, keeps me up to date with the ongoings of the Regiment,” He defended.

“I wouldn’t have pegged you for the type,” Faye teased. “Maybe we can make a weekly meeting to chat about the scouts, it’ll help me get acquainted with everyone and get to know you better,” She kept a bright grin, and Erwin smiled politely in return, somewhat embarrassed by Faye’s sharp intuition.

“Sometimes you’re really hard to read,” Faye started again. “See, usually you give this guarded smile like you just did, but I can’t figure out if you’re amused by the situation, or just trying to be courteous.”

“Usually it’s just a formality,” Erwin admitted, impressed by Faye’s bluntness. “Sometimes I do mean it though.”

“That’s helpful,” Faye snorted. “I guess it’s just one of those things I’ll have to pick up on.”

Another long stretch of silence passed by where the two looked at all the passing greenery, listening to the horses trotting along the pathway.

“What would you do if someone was gaining intel on you, but you weren’t certain, and you had no way of knowing,” Faye asked, filling the silence with her question. Her heart was thrumming in her chest when she spared Erwin a glance, whose face had quickly gone from pensive to calculated.

“Who do you think is spying on you?” He pried, “Perhaps I can pull a few strings and get their—”

“It’s complicated,” Faye weakly cut in. Her stomach felt like it was tying itself into knots, and she outwardly looked as conflicted as she felt. “I, um—” She was stammering now, and she couldn’t just not tell him. “I have a twin—” Erwin’s eyes bulged at the news. There hadn’t been any mention of Faye’s mother, but a twin as well? How had the government missed two files in the Jaeger family? “I heard that Judge Orwell was going to send an update to him and—”

“Faye, this is serious, why wouldn’t you tell me about this as soon as you found out?” He didn’t look angry, he never did, but Faye was sure he was seething just below his skin, where her eyes couldn’t quite reach.

“It’s—” ‘It’s complicated’ She was going to repeat.

“Not something you can divulge,” He finished for her, a hand raking through his hair rather aggressively, unaware of the way Faye shrunk into herself in perpetual guilt and turmoil. “Is there anything you can tell me so I can help you?”

“I only found out after Eren's trial, so don't get your panties in a twist over my concealment of this." She couldn't help but sigh and glare down at the ground. Perhaps mentioning her predicament with Zeke was a mistake. "Al' wouldn't be involved, he's lived in the walls his whole life. But maybe..." She trailed off, sparing Erwin a glance and receding under the intensity with which he listened to her. He looked to be hanging onto every syllable she mumbled out, “How is John connected to everything?"

"John?" Erwin echoed, brows raising and lips threatening to twitch. "John Orwell? Your judge?"

"He married into the family five years ago, right after—"Her jaw went slack while the world encroached upon her thoughts.

Five years ago.

Five f*cking years ago.

“I’m a fool,” She whispered. “An absolute moron, oh my god.” The walls. He’d gotten in when Wall Maria was breached, and who knew how many others had infiltrated during that time, and now that Trost had been recently kicked in by the colossal, there were most definitely more of them inside the walls. They were like sitting ducks inside the walls, and it was only a matter of time before Marley decided to take action against them all.

Her grip tightened on the reins, and her lips pulled into a thin line. Whatever self-pity she’d been subjected to was washed away and replaced with frustration. She knew when the Marleyans got in, but now she had to wonder: Why would they even bother?

“Faye, you need to give me something to work with,” Erwin sighed, his hand brushing through his golden hair yet again.

“Not time yet,” Faye numbly murmured, panic surging through her muscles and tendons.

“How will you know when the time comes?” The commander was obviously foreign to not being the one in control, and it blatantly showed through his tone and the aggressive way he kept touching his hair.

“Erwin,” Faye viciously ripped herself away from her thoughts, fixing Erwin with what she could only hope was a reassuring tilt on her lips, and she softened her eyes at the exhausted expression he wore. “I need you to trust me. My life is in your hands just as much as your life is in mine.”

“That's not easily done,” He mirrored her microexpressions to perfection, his eyes reflecting the inner conflict he felt while still coming off apologetic and resolved. "You seem to have all the answers we've been searching for, but you refuse to share your knowledge."

She didn't know how she knew what sliver to let him know about, but her bones lifted, and her heart thrummed, whispering into her soul about what she needed to tell Erwin.

“The royal family here,” She hesitantly commenced, noting how fast Erwin’s eyes snapped up to meet hers. He was desperate for the information, like a hungry dog for food. “When the walls were first built,” Her heart was pounding against her chest in absolute dread, but the commander's raced in anticipation. He knew exactly what she was going to say, but he needed to hear the words from her lips, so he quietly listened. “They changed everyone’s memories. It made everyone more compliant, and fearful of what laid beyond the walls.”

His lips curled up in victory. Yes. Faye was most definitely someone he was invested with now, he’d make sure to keep her close.

“Thank you for telling me.” The blond breathed, dipping his head in thanks. “That makes quite a bit of sense.” He would tell her eventually, it would be an exchange of sorts, he would tell her about his father, and she would tell him whatever it was that weighed so heavily on her conscience.

“We had a deal,” Faye absentmindedly fingered the leather reins. “I told you this was only going to work if we trust each other, and I meant it.”

“Yes, well, I didn’t assume this would come at the price of your mental health,” Erwin nobly admitted. “You look so depressed, it’s almost hard to recognize you. When we get to HQ, you should take the day to rest and allow Levi’s squad to clean your medical wing.” He let his eyes linger on hers, baby blue eyes on sharp green ones, and the longer he stared, the more he felt like he was staring into a yawning chasm filled with knowledge and secrets.

“I’d actually rather clean my wing if that’s okay,” Faye awkwardly asked. “Makes me feel like I have some sliver of control in my life.”

The commander’s eyes narrowed at the medic’s words, and he took a long moment to mull them over before he carefully said:

“You should talk to Levi about that. He’ll understand better than most.”

“Are you going to tell him?” It was an innocent question, though it still knocked the wind out of Faye when she asked.

Erwin’s eyes met Faye’s again, and he furrowed his thick blond brows at the vulnerable tone she used.

“Do you want me to?” He countered, slowing his horse to come to a stop to properly assess Faye, and she mirrored his movements.

She chewed her lip, thinking it over carefully. How was she even supposed to answer him?

“I—” She wet her lips, keeping Erwin’s eye in a contemplative manner. “I think I would be okay if you did. I just—I know how much this is to deal with alone, and you guys seem pretty close, and I mean—I think he’s my friend, maybe.” She was rambling, letting the thoughts out of her head.

“I’ll have a meeting with him tonight then,” Erwin decided, shifting on his horse to continue the tread forward. “As per our agreement, is there anything you want to ask me?”

“Yeah, actually,” Faye followed closely to Erwin. “It’s been on my mind for a while now,” Erwin’s brow raised, prompting Faye to continue. “Bertha Bauer—” His stomach dropped. “—She had some choice words for you, and I never got to ask her about them before she—” Her lips pulled into a frown. “Before she was executed.”

“I can’t imagine she had much nice to say,” He sighed out, trying to find a decent way to explain the situation.

“What? Did she try and exploit your sex life?” Faye snorted, but when a heartbeat of uncomfortable silence followed, Faye swiveled to the side to stare at Erwin, who, despite his racing heart, blinked when he caught her eyes.

“I’m only a man,” Erwin dryly admitted, not noticing the way Faye’s expression had dropped in mild horror.

“Listen,” Her stomach had curdled in on itself, she hadn’t said much about her previous sexual endeavors, deciding it wasn’t worth mentioning, but maybe she should have spoken up. “Is this something I’m going to need to worry about?”

“Worry about?” Erwin’s lips twitched down, confusion spilling over him. “I don’t think so—” A garbled sound spilled out of his throat before he realized what she meant, and it would have been laughable how fast he tried to convince Faye of his noble intentions. “It wasn’t anything like that,” He assured, “I came in every month after an expedition and—”

“Erwin, I’ll tell you the same thing I told Bertha when she tried telling me about your sexual exploits:” Faye cut in, teetering on the horse. “Don’t ruin the image I have of you.”

“Men. I slept with men,” Erwin blurted out, his cheeks had gone red, and the breeze did little to soothe his furious blush. “She was trying to blackmail me and expose me as a hom*osexual.”

There was a beat of silence before Faye tilted her head and raised a fine eyebrow.

“I’m sorry, have you met Alexander?” She was being sarcastic, and she made it abundantly clear. “He’s as gay as it gets, if that’s all it was, then it makes no difference to me.” Her thoughts flashed back to the first Alexander she’d ever met, back in the trenches and his lover, and she found herself muttering out the same words he’d confidently spoken to her. “Love is love.”

“I wouldn’t call it love,” Erwin thoughtfully hummed, easing when he realized he wouldn’t be shamed for his sexual encounters. “It’s just what I grew acquainted with for a long time.”

“You should talk to Alexander, he’s been cracking jokes about boning you since the day he met you,” She let out a soft snort. “Imagine his surprise when he finds out he’s not actually that far off.”

“I’d appreciate it if you kept this between us,” Erwin gave another polite smile, trying not to come off as pushy and domineering.

“Yeah, that’s fine,” Faye stretched her arms, letting her back crack. “He’s going to be shipping you with people though, and that’s a conversation I’ll be a part of.”

“Shipping..?”

“Where you think two people would look cute together, it’s a whole thing,” Faye waved dismissively. “He’s already started with you, Mike, and Levi,” She let a small smile slip at all the threesome jokes he’d made. “Nothing personal or anything, just helps pass the time in his little head.”

Erwin, meanwhile, had no clue what to do with the new information, and he tried to quell the discomfort stirring in the pit in his stomach.

“So,” Faye drawled. “Where does this conversation land us on the friend spectrum?”

“The friend spectrum?” Erwin narrowed his eyes, “I’d assume we’re quite close considering we know a few of each other's innermost secrets, wouldn’t you say?”

“Not the same,” Faye flatly stated. “I knew the identities of murderers, but I was never friends with them,” Exchanged goods and teachings, yes, but that was little more than a trade-off. “Am I allowed to come pop into your office and annoy you?”

“Your bluntness is astounding,” Erwin praised with an ironic lip curve, easing himself the more he saw the usual, chipper Faye present herself. “It’s only a matter of time before we get comfortable with each other.” He watched Faye nod before he tried his hand at lying. “I consider myself amicable with you.”

“No, you don’t,” Faye swallowed, there was no hesitation in her statement. “It’s different with us. With Levi, you look at him so fondly, and with Mike, you seem to just click, but you don’t do either with me,” She huffed a little bit, “Guess we’ll have to gossip together like school girls to build our friendship up, huh?”

Erwin let slip a chuckle, eyes flashing in amusem*nt. “I’ll start by telling you Mike is interested in his second in command.”

“No way,” The doctor grinned, “Isn’t that against the rules?”

“Who’s going to tell the commander?” Erwin shrugged, lips twitching upward. “As far as I’m concerned, I know nothing, and they would make a cute couple.”

“Erwin,” Faye mockingly gaped. “What else?”

That’s how the two spent the rest of their trip down to the castle, gossiping like two old women about the scouts, and admittedly, Faye was excited to put names to the faces in her head.

When the base finally came into view, it had Faye tilting her head to take in it’s decrepit grandeur through a small opening in the leaves. It was an old castle, which looked to have been older than any landmark she’d previously ever encountered. For a minute, Faye wondered how many people knew the castle even existed, and how many thieves had raided its walls.

Faye glanced curiously up at the old castle, which hadn’t fared well against the weather. It was ancient and worn down, but stood tall. “Erwin, isn’t this castle a bit, well, impractical?” She asked, glancing between the man beside her and the Scout’s new Base of Operations.

“Under normal circ*mstances, I’d agree with you,” Erwin sighed. “But for our current plans, it’ll serve our purpose well. Eren needs to be kept under lock and key, and you need a large medical wing, where you can grow your greenery and treat the injured.”

“Yeah, I suppose you’re right. I’m sure Hange also needs a lot of space to conduct experiments too,” Faye thoughtfully added, earning a nod from the blond.

“They’re deployed at a different base,” He informed, shifting back into the tone he used when he took on the role of Commander. “This one is exclusively secluded in order to give Levi and his squad some privacy while working with Eren, and because of your medical prowess, you go where Eren goes.”

“Makes sense,” She bobbed her head. “Can’t go letting him die before the expedition, can we?”

When they approached the front door, Erwin offered to guide her horse to the stables, sending Faye off to ask one of Levi’s squadmates where the medical quarters were. She stepped towards the door but stopped short when her eyes caught onto the windowsill, where mushrooms had begun to sprout in the shade.

She inched toward the fungus, bending her head over to closely inspect it. “Amanita Phalloides,” Faye muttered, noting the signature curvature of the mushroom. “I should come back to collect some, it’s pretty deadly—” The window swung open, dust clouding Faye’s vision just as she had moved her head out of the way, nearly getting smoked by the wooden frames.

Her fist moved on some deranged mix of muscle memory and instinct, launching itself forward while Faye swore. Her balled fist connected just off to the side of the white figure’s nose, having moved at the last second in an attempt to dodge, but the damage had already been done.

A groan sounded out as Faye froze, looking over at Levi who’d worn a white mask and matching bandana to protect himself from the dust. “sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t, ” she swore, hopping over the window to kneel next to Levi. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry,” She apologized, helping him sit up and gently tilting his head forward when she noticed the nosebleed seeping through his mask.

“I thought you were supposed to heal people, not injure them,” He groaned, sending a dirty look up at Faye.

“I’m so sorry, all I saw was this white figure and—”

“Captain? Petra is wondering when—” Faye’s heart dropped when a man had stalked around the corner and into the room. He stared at her for a split second, the scene in front of him registering before he recognized Faye as an enemy, and leaped forward, tackling her away from his captain.

It was Faye’s turn to groan when her head slammed against the floor so hard it bounced, and her vision had gone blurry while bizarre shapes formed in bright, lucid colors. The air had been knocked out of her windpipe, and Faye heard herself take a rattled breath, struggling to breathe it out before taking another. The soldier sat on her stomach, further adding to her inability to breathe properly, while he held both of her wrists above her head.

“Captain, are you alright?” Vaguely, the man who’d tackled her had turned his head slightly to glance at Captain Levi through his peripherals but otherwise kept his beady eyes trained on the woman beneath him.

“Stand down, Gunther,” Levi ordered, shaking his head to orient himself, clutching onto his nose.

“But, sir—”

“Stand down,” Levi repeated, voice rising as he got to his feet, watching Gunther slowly remove himself from Faye’s stomach, releasing her wrists. She coughed for a moment when a little too much air had filled her throat in a rush while Levi had moved to kneel next to her, slapping her back while still pinching his nose.

“I’m so sorry,” Faye apologized again when she’d finally stopped her coughing fit. “I swear, I didn’t know it was you, you scared me and I thought it was a ghost and my hand acted out of instinct, but when I realized it was you it was too late and—”

“Stop talking faster than a horse can run,” Levi interjected, undoing his mask only to reveal his lips curled down in an irritated frown. Blood had dripped down his nose and was smeared around thanks to his cleaning bandana, and when his lips opened, Faye flinched at the bloody teeth he wore. “Gunther, go find Commander Erwin and direct him to the medical wing,” He ordered, swiftly hooking his arm around Faye’s waist and hoisting her to her feet.

She followed suit, wrapping her own arm around Levi’s torso trying to support him just as much as he was for her, but he seemed much less disoriented while he moved through the castle.

“You can punch me back,” Faye sounded from next to him as he turned a corner.

“What are we? Ten-year-olds?” He scoffed, itching to wipe the blood from his face.

“I’ll make it up to you, I swear,” Faye promised, entering through a door where Levi set her onto a cot before also taking a seat himself. Her head was throbbing, and every time she glanced out the window she had to screw her eyes shut because of how bright the sun was.

“What were you even doing right outside the window?” Levi questioned, pinching his nose to stop the blood flow. He watched Faye furrow her eyebrows, obviously trying to concentrate and think back.

“There was a mushroom, it’s pretty lethal.” She voiced, “I was going to stick it in a jar and keep it.”

“Well, that’s one way to start your first day in the Survey Corps,” Erwin greeted from the doorway, clutching onto a few heavy sacks.

“Can you fill a bowl with water and fish out some cloths from that bag,” Faye asked, pointing towards the middle bag. She hadn’t tried to stand up quite yet, hyper-aware of her right leg which had begun to uncontrollably shake, embarrassment drowning in her lungs.

Erwin wasted no time in carrying out Faye’s request, quickly returning and setting her supplies down on the bed next to her and Levi. He watched with interest as she dipped the cloth into the water, and began gently dabbing at the blood which had started dripping down the Captain’s chin. When she could actually see the skin beneath the blood, she had prodded the nose, letting out a relieved sigh.

“Good news, your nose is still intact,” She informed, pressing the material into the dribbling blood. “Bad news, you’ll be bruised for a while, and it probably hurts like a bitch right now.”

She had handed Levi the damp cloth, instead slowly standing on wobbly legs and trying to make her way over to the bags which Erwin had conveniently placed just out of reach on the floor. When she took her second step, she stumbled, and Erwin had rushed forward to keep her head from smashing against the floor a second time.

“Thanks,” She breathed, “I think I’ll be okay now though.”

“That was some right hook,” Levi admitted, fingering the swollen side of his face, he found it bizarre to know he was touching something that should have hurt but felt nothing.

“That’s some subordinate,” Faye countered, forcing herself to unzip yet another bag and take an anti-inflammatory, trying to lessen the headache which had continued to pound away relentlessly. Her fingertip had grazed the back of her head, where a lump had already started forming. “He must really care for you if he jumped me like that, couldn’t even blink before he was on top of me.”

Erwin had inched closer to Faye, carefully tilting her head forwards and running his finger over her scalp, frowning. “You have a bump,” He informed, releasing her head. “Is there anything you can do to heal faster?”

“No,” She mumbled. “The most I can do is take some acetaminophen and avoid any more collisions to my head.” Erwin nodded in response.

“I’ll send Gunther to clean in here, you can do some less physical tasks,” Levi stated, already heading for the door.

“Don’t worry about it,” Faye dismissed. “I need some time to gather my thoughts, but you can send Alexander in if you want,” She sent up a small smile, “I know he’s not great at cleaning, and from what I hear, your standards are pretty high-”

“His sh*tty cleaning is a disgrace,” Levi cut in. “You can expect to see him in two minutes.” He exited swiftly, not leaving room for argument- not that Faye would have objected.

“So,” She started awkwardly, maintaining eye contact with Erwin. “I guess I’ll see you next week?”

“I’ll stop by again later tonight, actually,” He informed, his tone carrying unyielding authority. “I’ll bring back a rifle and more supplies, and I need to have a meeting with Levi.”

“Don’t forget about my flowers and tea.”

*

“sh*t!” Gunther breathed, eyes wide. “I thought she was screwing with us.”

“Yeah,” Eld muttered back. “The first shot she took was completely off—but sh*t, the second one?”

“Dead center too,” Petra called, having jogged forward to inspect the empty can.

“Faye,” Alexander nudged her side, eyes wide in surprise. “I knew we kept a rifle in the shop just in case—but I’ve never seen you shoot the f*cking thing. Where’d you learn this?”

“My dad,” Faye shrugged, a small smirk tugging at her lips. “Went hunting a lot when I was a kid.” It was a complete lie, but it wasn’t like she could come clean about it all and tell Alexander she had enlisted in the military in a foreign country, and had more experience than most soldiers within the walls when it came to shooting men down in the name of war.

“Damn brat. It was probably just a lucky shot,” Oluo grumbled, crossing his arms. “I’d like to see you hit all the cans with that much precision.”

Faye chanced a backward glance over at Erwin and Levi, who stood a few paces to her right to observe her skills. They were basked in the orange glow of the sunset, and Erwin wore an entertained curve on his lips—something that Faye’s heart leaped at.

“Go ahead,” He nodded. “I’m interested to see if you can prove Mr. Bozado wrong.”

Faye’s eyes slid over to Oluo, who wore a similar scowl to Levi. “You asked for it,” She grinned. It was like riding a bicycle, and she nestled back into her position with the rifle. Petra cleared the area, returning to stand next to Eld, and Faye took in a deep breath, squaring her shoulders while she relaxed. Her jaw unclenched while she aimed the rifle, carefully adjusting due to the wind, and she gently squeezed the trigger, feeling the kickback.

She wasted no time in pointing her rifle at the next can on the fence, and in rapid succession, all five of them had been shot at, all knocked onto the grass.

“How come dad never took me hunting?” Eren whined, tactfully hiding his surprise.

“You probably would have shot yourself,” Faye quipped, stretching her shoulders back to grin. “Besides, you’d have scared all the game off, and we would have gone without dinner.”

“What?!—”

“f*cking medic got them all!” Gunther shouted from the field, his fingers tracing over the bullet-riddled cans.

“It’s official,” Alexander crossed his arms, leaning against a particularly large boulder. “My best friend is a complete badass.”

“It took you that long to figure out?” Faye snorted, carefully pulling the safety lock back into place before she looped the gun to sit on her back. “I thought that would have been made clear when you watched me deliver a baby via cesarean section.”

“That’s quite impressive, Faye,” Erwin complimented, “How far do you think you can shoot from?” He was all business, though he definitely seemed more at ease than when he dropped her off, and that was enough to put Faye into a chipper mood.

“Never really tested it out,” She admitted.

“Faye, try from over here!” Petra waved her hand from across the field, a good twenty meters backward. “I want to see Oluo speechless, come on!”

“Like she could pull that off,” Bozado scoffed from beside Faye. “I can barely see them from here, so how is this brat going to see the cans from way over there?”

“Hey Captain Levi,” Alex called, following close behind Faye as she marched over to where Petra was. “If Faye makes this, do I have permission to whack Oluo?” He was being cheeky, his boyish grin on display which almost seemed contagious.

“Permission denied,” Levi deadpanned, his arms crossed. “Instead of making sh*tty jokes, you should focus on improving your lamentable cleaning skills, you’re almost as awful as Eren.”

“Alright,” Faye stretched, positioning her body in the grass. “Let’s see,” She hummed as she narrowed her eyes, watching Gunther and Eld step away from the newly placed cans. They had moved them around, spaced them out in a bizarre placement, though it wasn’t a problem. She nestled closely to the rifle, squaring her shoulders, easing the muscles, and aiming.

Her finger squeezed the trigger five times, all one after the other.

“That’s my f*cking captain, and you can all suck it!” Alexander yelled, fists pumping into the air.

“Faye, that’s incredible,” Petra praised, watching as her teammates picked up the cans. “How long has it been since you last fired a gun?”

“A few years I think,” Faye’s scratched her head, hiding the grimace as she remembered the war cries on the battlefield, which haunted her nights.

“That’s enough for tonight,” Erwin hollered, waving his hand to signal he wanted her to move closer.

Faye slung the rifle onto her back again, easily closing the distance between her and the commander.

“Told you I wasn’t half bad with a rifle,” She teased. “I know I’m still a bit slow, but I think if I practice a bit more, I can—”

“Slow?” Gunther incredulously questioned. “You hit all those cans in the time in takes Oluo to piss—” Bozado sent up a dirty look, mumbling something about Gunther being a brat. “—And you’re calling yourself slow? That’s insane.”

“Gunther’s right,” Eld acknowledged. “You’re deadly with that rifle, it’s crazy.”

“Stop pestering the sh*tty doctor and start dinner,” Levi ordered, and when no one moved, Levi let out an irritated huff of air, pinching the bridge of his nose. “What are you all waiting for? Get the f*ck into the kitchen, now!” He barked, prompting his soldiers to jump and scramble off to the castle hastily.

“You too, Al’,” Faye jutted her chin in the direction of the others. “I’d appreciate it if you watered all the seeds we planted earlier.”

“Aye aye, captain,” Al’ sent up a mock salute before he scurried off, leaving the three to stare at each other.

“Erwin said you knew how to handle a knife,” Levi stated, carefully watching the tilt Faye’s head took. “Show me.” His hand had already whipped a dagger out, holding the handle for Faye to take.

“I’m not as good with one,” Faye hesitantly took the blade, gripping it backward exactly like Kenny had taught her while she took a step back, bending her legs at the knees. The unique grip Faye had on the knife didn’t go unnoticed by Levi or Erwin, though Levi narrowed his eyes and scoffed at it before he launched forward.

He heard Faye swear, the metal clanging together as she lifted her knife up at the last second, deflecting him and causing his blade to rebound off of hers—a move he recognized a little too well. He pivoted to the side, swiping, and he nicked her arm, frowning before he pulled back.

Faye lunged this time, angling her knife for his, and she rounded her hand, but Levi was faster, and his leg swept out, knocking Faye onto her back before he pounced, landing to straddle her waist while his hand angled the dagger at her neck.

“Too slow,” He muttered out. “We’ll work on that.” He grunted when he got to his feet before he offered her a hand. “Your movements are sloppy, and your stance isn’t balanced enough.”

“Do you think she could hold her own against a civilian?” Erwin inquired from behind them, his brow raised.

“Yeah, probably against the MPs and Garrison soldiers too,” Levi let out a heavy sigh. “I’ll train with her every couple of days to get her into shape, and you said one of the new recruits was going to take over her ODM gear training?” He was stressing himself out over nothing—but the grip and the way she’d made his knife bounce off of hers—he shuttered out a breath. It was all too familiar, and the nostalgia was hitting him like a ton of bricks. “I’ll check in on that too every week, just to make sure she’s suitable for the expedition.”

“Good,” Erwin gave a resolute nod. “See to it that she’s well prepared for any and all instances.”

“You know I’ve survived all this time by myself, right?” Faye questioned, breaking into their conversation. “I know I pale in comparison to you,” Her eyes met Levi’s in a defiant stare, “But I didn’t think I was that bad.”

“There’s always room for improvement,” Erwin cut in gently. “You’re being targeted by a potentially dangerous criminal, and I’d feel safer knowing you can carry your own against most anyone. That includes Levi.”

“When you come back next week, bring some pistols,” Levi ordered, shifting his weight. “It would do well for her to learn how to use a smaller gun in case of emergencies.”

“Good thinking,” Erwin nodded. “In any case, I’ll be taking my leave. The messenger should arrive in two days, so make sure you turn in all your paperwork and status reports.”

“Will do,” Faye sighed. “Don’t forget my—”

“Ah, yes,” Erwin smirked as he dipped his fingers into his jacket pocket, pulling out a few dandelions, “I almost forgot.” Satisfaction rolled through him at the surprised look on Faye’s face, and he relished in the way her jaw slackened. “I didn’t have time to stop by a florist, so I hope they’ll make due.”

“Yeah,” Faye swallowed. “I’ll get them into some water, thank you,” The curve her lips took told her she sincerely appreciated his gesture. “Until next week?”

“Until next week,” He nodded, spinning on his heel and making his way to the stables, leaving Levi and Faye to stare at his retreating form.

“What’s with the sh*tty flowers?” Levi impatiently asked, eying them in mild disgust.

“Erwin was being nosy, so he’s compensating for his curiosity by bringing me flowers and tea every week,” Faye grinned brightly. “Didn’t expect him to actually go out of his way for me though.”

Levi tsked, gently grabbing onto Faye’s elbow to lead her back to the castle. “They’re just flowers, no need to get so f*cking sentimental over them,” He let a beat of silence pass before he added, “Bees probably sh*t all over them.”

“Alright Mr. Clean,” Faye sarcastically retorted. “No need to ruin the nice gesture with your sh*t jokes.”

“Who said I was joking?” Levi fired back. His lips had curved up just slightly—it was an action so minuscule no one would ever notice it unless they were specifically looking for it, but it made Faye breathe out a small laugh, that was until his lips tugged down again, and the bags under the short captain's eyes deepened. “Erwin said it was a criminal who taught you how to wield a knife,” He said it reluctantly, as though he were wary of the answer. “You think he’ll come after you too?”

Faye tilted her head at the guarded way Levi spoke, and after a heartbeat, she shook her head. “No.” She let his eyes snap to hers, and she sent up a small, reassuring smile. “I think he has a soft spot for me, so I’m not too worried he’ll try to take my life.”

A heartbeat of silence passed, and Levi finally exhaled his guilty conscience.

“I’m sorry.”

It was only two words, but it was all Levi could offer without feeling like some kind of sh*tty sentimentalist.

“Are you planning on hanging onto that ring for the rest of your life?” Faye side-eyed the captain, grinning when he scoffed.

“Like I’d want to keep your sh*tty ring,” He grumbled, but his heart gave a thick thud, one that vibrated down to the pits of his stomach, internally letting him know that statement couldn’t be further from the truth- even if he’d never admit it out loud. His free hand came up to pull the twine from around his neck, and he passed it over, his fingertips brushing over Faye’s palm.

“Hey Levi,” Faye bumped her shoulder with his, “You want some tea when we get back?”

“I have tea leaves from your shop, if you want,” Levi softly offered, letting his shoulders roll back. “Bought some while you were out of commission.”

“Are you serious?” Faye’s eyes were brimming with something akin to flattery. “What type did you get?”

He looked to his left at a patch of dirt, and he forced his lips to twitch into a frown. “All of them.” He could feel his ears burning, and he hoped the low lighting would hide it from Faye’s sharp eyes.

“I thought you said herbal tea wasn’t real tea?” She challenged just as the castle came into view.

“My squad enjoys it, and I like to treat them every once in a while to boost morale,” He mumbled, back stiffening. He sent out a silent prayer that she wouldn’t push, and he heaved out a sigh when she nodded.

“You grab the black tea and I’ll boil some water?” She proposed, glancing over at Alexander.

“Whatever,” Levi let Faye’s elbow go, and he stepped through the side door, sending a fleeting look over at Faye before he closed the door.

“So how come you never told me you were a complete marksman?” Alexander questioned when Faye neared him, he’d been over by the valerian root, dumping a bucket of water over the soil.

“Never came up in a conversation before,” She shyly admitted. “It’s also kind of a hard-hitting subject for me—you know, with my dad and all.”

Alexander nodded in understanding. She’d never been too keen on discussing her parents, and that only worsened after her dad disappeared.

“Are you ever going to want to talk about them with me?” He let the words slip, they’d been on his mind for the last five years, and the insecurity was driving him up the wall.

“Eventually,” Faye mumbled out. “I think I’ll need to tell Erwin and Levi first though.”

“That bad?” Alex’s eyebrows had raised, his lips turning down.

“Worse.”

Chapter 13: 9. Eren's Accidental Shift

Chapter Text

“Damn,” Alexander muttered out lowly from beside Faye. “So that’s what titans look like.”

“Dead titans,” Faye corrected, staring up at the heaps of steaming bones. “Wonder who did them in,” Her eyes shifted towards Hange, who looked equally heartbroken as they did infuriated, and they looked to be spewing out some choice words to Erwin.

“Who keeps titans as pets?” Alexander sassily questioned, his hand resting on his hips while he surveyed the skeletal remains. “I can’t really imagine they make good company.”

“I don’t know,” Faye softly said, her mind flickering back to the glassy-eyed, grinning titan who’d once been her mother. “They look human enough, why couldn’t they pass as something akin to us?”

“Because they think we’re a tasty midday snack,” Alexander deadpanned. “Imagine getting chomped by one-” His back shivered, and he made a disgusted sound. “Their breath probably smells like a skunk, nasty motherf*ckers.”

“Alright, just because I made you minty toothpaste,” Faye started, a sarcastic curve on her lips while she held Alexander’s stare. “Does not mean you have superior oral hygiene in comparison to titans.” She grinned when Alexander met her eyes, mockingly placing a hand over his chest as though Faye had driven a sword through his heart. “You’d actually have to use it for that.”

“I do!” He defended. “See?” He leaned in a little too close for comfort, blowing out a breath for Faye to sniff. “Minty fresh or whatever, right? It’s just because I don’t do my laundry with mint that I don’t smell as good as you.”

“That’s why you smell like mint,” Mike sent up a smirk from behind Faye, his lips curling at the medic and her assistant. “I could never figure it out until now.” He let himself sniff the pair, satisfied to see they still smelled the same. “Usually people smell like their surroundings, but I’m glad to see that the castle hasn’t rubbed off on the two of you yet.”

“Was that your way of telling us you missed us?” Alexander inquired, raising his brow, but he grinned when Mike slung an arm around his shoulder and pulled Faye in for a group hug.

“How’s Levi treating the two of you?” He questioned, releasing them.

“He’s really grumpy,” Alex whined. “And he expects us to clean every day, and then he gets pissy because I have to come in after working in the garden, and he complains because, and I quote,” Alexander rested his face, pulling his lips down into what he thought Levi’s scowl looked like. “‘f*cking moron, tracking all that filthy mud through the castle,’” He’d lowered his voice to try and imitate the short captain, but it sounded awkward. “And he’s never satisfied when I mop it all up-”

“Because you have the cleaning skills of a sh*tty toddler,” Levi cut in with a frown. He’d come out of nowhere, startling the lanky redhead. “The only person who knows how to properly clean is Faye.”

The medic blinked, but before she could send up a response, Alexander had pounced on the opportunity to argue.

“That’s because she cleans everything down in the infirmary with disinfectant to keep it all- sh*t, what’s that word you use, Faye?”

“Sterile,” Faye offered, watching in blatant amusem*nt.

“Sterile! Yes,” He went to jab a finger into Levi’s chest, but the captain caught his hand midair, and twisted his wrist, making the lanky lieutenant bend his knees to try and relieve the pressure.

“Don’t touch me with your dirty hands,” Levi glared. “Didn’t I already tell you it’s against the law to assault military personnel?” He seemed to be in an exceptionally dour mood today, and he twisted Alex’s wrist a bit more.

“Alright guys,” Faye stepped in, her hand gently picking the short captain’s fingers off of her assistant’s wrist. “Let’s refrain from physically hurting each other and creating unnecessary work for me,” She kept herself in the middle of the two, just in case Alexander tried to pull a fast one on Levi.

“Faye!” Her head swiveled at the familiar voice just as a blond mop of hair leaped forward, only for Levi to step in with lightning-quick reflexes. His fingers wrapped around their wrist, and within the second, he’d pinned them on the floor, a hard look in his eyes. What he hadn’t been expecting was for the second pair of arms to pounce on the medic in a panicked mess.

“Morning Armin,” Faye awkwardly addressed, blinking at the teenager from over Levi’s shoulder while she patted Mikasa’s back.

“You know this brat?” The short captain grunted, narrowing his eyes at Faye.

“Yeah, Armin is one of Eren’s best friends, he stayed with us after Shiganshina fell,” She appeased, prompting Levi to release the boy- albeit a little roughly. “This is Mikasa, she’s Eren’s other best friend, graduated top of her class.”

“Is-Is Eren okay?” Mikasa seemed a little out of place, usually calm and collected, but her anxiety must have really done a number on her mental state, fraying her emotions.

“He’s fine, I wouldn’t let anything happen to him unless he deserved it,” Faye assured. “I’ll send some tea over for you, looks like you haven’t been sleeping too well lately.”

Armin looked down at Faye, his lips tilting down in confusion.

“Faye, what are you doing here?” He’d let his emotions get the better of him at seeing the familiar face, and he couldn’t stop himself in time before he tried to hug her, but then- His eyes slid over to Levi, and a strangled gasp left his lips before he sent up a stiff salute. “Captain Levi, sir.”

“At ease, brat,” Levi ordered, allowing Armin’s shoulders to ease up.

“What,” Faye grinned, “No hug for your favorite adult?” She held her hands out, and Armin wasted no time in wrapping his arms around the comforting doctor. She’d been a big part of his life, taking him, Mikasa, and Eren in when Shiganshina fell, and his respect for her had only grown since then.

“I missed you,” The blond breathed, “Trost fell, and then I saw you at Eren’s court hearing-” The color drained from his face. Of course, the hearing. “You! You’re a captain now. That’s why you’re here.”

“Yeah,” Faye let out an awkward laugh, releasing the teenager. “I dragged Alexander along too, he’s my lieutenant.”

“And you guys are part of the Survey Corps?” His eyes narrowed in on the patch on Alexander’s standard-issue leather jacket, and when his eyes shifted back to Faye, he frowned. She wasn’t wearing anything that was remotely close to the uniform. Slacks, sandals, and a loose-fitting long-sleeved shirt. If she was a captain, why wasn’t she wearing the uniform?

“Erwin doesn’t exactly take no for an answer,” The medic vaguely waved her hand before she turned to Mikasa, her face settling from the smile. “I was actually hoping to see you, I was hoping you could teach me the basics on the ODM gear.”

“Me?” Mikasa’s brow furrowed, “But wouldn’t it be better if Captain Levi or Captain Mike-”

“They’ve got their own squads to deal with, and I figured you’d be on board to watch Alexander fly face-first into a bunch of trees,” Faye’s lips stretched to reveal a toothy grin. “I think I’ll only need a day or two to figure it out, but Al’ will probably need the full four weeks, if you’re feeling up to it.”

“That’s fine,” Mikasa gave a nod. “You’ll need to speak to-”

“Faye,” Erwin strolled over, and the medic’s lips turned down.

“It’s like I’m a magnet.” Her eyes roved over the small group she’d managed to attract, and she scrunched her nose. “Erwin, this is Mikasa Ackerman, she’ll be taking over Alex and I’s gear training,” She introduced, before moving down the line to the blond. “This is Armin, he’s pretty intelligent, you should ask him around to play chess or something.”

“High praise,” He dipped his head as greeting to Armin, taking in the teenager’s cautious eyes. “Faye doesn’t give out compliments to just anyone,” He let his hand rise, offering it for the boy to shake reluctantly. He kept his hand firm around Armin’s, committing his face and name to memory before he turned his eyes back to Mikasa. “You were top of the 104th corps, weren’t you?” He gave a polite smile, also shaking the teenager’s hand. “Quite an accomplishment, it’s a pleasure to have you join the regiment.” His eyes slid over to Faye, and his lips thinned. “I’d like a word with you, if you don’t mind.”

Faye’s stomach dropped, eyes narrowing in on the tall commander. He looked tense- more so than usual. Her nod was curt, and she followed his swift footsteps into the R&D base.

It was another old, musty castle, but it wasn't kept organized like the one Levi’s squad had taken up residence in. The corners were all home to spiders, and the walls and sconces were all covered in a thick layer of dust. Dirt and mud had all settled into the cracks in the cobblestone, and if Levi were to step foot into the castle, Faye was sure he'd have a field day.

Hange’s office was in worse shape, papers strewn across their desk and floor haphazardly along with glass vials over candles filled with strange colored liquids littered around the room. The bookcase was a mess, half of its books were laid on top of one another, not having been put away properly.

Faye watched him take a seat in Hange’s chair, leaning against the backrest. He looked like he’d seen better days. His shoulders were stiff, he had dark eye bags, but he looked jittery, strung up on adrenaline and stress.

“You should take a nap.” The words came out brusque and clipped, and they made Erwin’s calculated eyes glance up at her in annoyance. “I mean it, Erwin,” She pressed, fingers pressing down into a frown at how irritated he seemed with her suggestion. “What’s got you so tense? Do you want a neck massage? You look like you’re ready to blow a gasket.”

His eyes softened, “That bad?” His massive hand came up to tiredly rub his cheek, and the sigh he heaved out made Faye’s breath hitch. He was going to drive himself into an early grave with how pressurized he was.

“Worse,” She breathed, her legs moving forward to position herself behind him while her fingers came up, prodding at the skin. “Undo a few buttons, I’ll try and get the knots out on your shoulders.” She watched him comply, and she felt around the muscles and tendons around his shoulders and neck. “You need to stop hunching over your desk.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” He muttered out, tensing when her thumb started loosening a knot. “The titans-” He grunted, a few choice words coming to mind, though he bit them back. “Do you think your twin had anything to do with them?” He almost breathed out a relieved sigh when she paused for a second, mulling over his words.

“It’s a possibility,” She licked her lips. “I was serious when I said I haven’t seen or heard word from him in eighteen years. I didn’t even know he was still alive,” He tensed again when she worked a little too aggressively. “I’ve got no clue what his motives are, but if he’s actively looking for me, I can’t assume anything good will come out of our reunion.”

Eighteen long years. Her words from when she’d sat on the beaches on Paradis with Eren Krueger and her father flashed inside her head, the words, “ I think I’m gonna kill him, ” Echoing and reverberating inside her being.

“There’s nothing you can tell me about him? Not a name? Nothing?” Erwin was digging for information like a mole.

“Zeke.” She sighed. “His name was Zeke.”

“Zeke Jaeger,” Erwin tasted the foreign name on his tongue. “And does he look like you?”

“Complete opposite, from what I remember,” Faye worked on a tendon, smoothing out the muscles. “It’s all pretty blurry though.”

*

It was day nine. Nine f*cking days spent listening to Alexander get on Levi’s nerves before Levi put him on stable duty. Nine days of Eren shuffling into the infirmary at first light to have tea with his sister. Nine days of Petra trying her absolute best to be friendly to Faye (Something seemed off about it, but the medic wasn’t in any position to complain.) And nine days where Levi’s entire squad would all filter into the field just after their afternoon tea to watch Faye practice her sharpshooting skills, placing bets on her like she was a horse.

Alexander had left for the day, as Faye told him to meet up with his father who happened to be in Calaneth for business, which left the infirmary much quieter than usual.

It was also the day Eren started his experiments with Hange, and as such, Faye was expected to be on standby in the infirmary should anyone get injured and need her, which wasn’t a big deal since Faye practically lived there.

She’d been seated at her desk, sipping on tea and overlooking some paperwork regarding the upcoming expedition when her door had slammed open, and in strolled Levi, holding Eren up by the scruff of his shirt wearing an exasperated frown. The two captains shared a tense bout of eye contact, each trying to find something to say to the other without coming out awkward.

Faye’s eyes trailed over to her brother, too uncomfortable to hold Levi’s scrutinizing gaze any longer. When her eyes shifted downward to the shameful expression Eren wore, she frowned. Faye’s brother’s chin was covered in blood, which had been gruesomely smeared.

“What, did you eat a girl out on her period?” The words had slipped past Faye’s lips before she could process them, leaving the Captain and Eren in stunned silence at the crudeness she’d voiced. Levi’s jaw slackened as he furrowed his brows, staring at Faye in shock. Faye blinked, cheeks suddenly burning while her words registered in her own ears, flushed and embarrassed.

“Faye, what the hell?” Eren snapped out of his stupor, shrugging out of Levi’s grasp and stomping up to his older sister. “You can’t just say sh*t like that in front of the Captain,” His eyes nervously shifted behind him to glance at Captain Levi, blood turning cold as he blinked dumbly. Eren had leaned in close, whispering quietly, “Besides, I don’t think Captain Levi has ever, you know,-”

“Finish that sentence and risk your funeral, Jaeger,” Levi snapped, scowling at the boy before he turned his vicious gaze upwards at Faye. “And you,” Faye couldn’t tell if Levi’s eyes held murderous intent or quiet amusem*nt. “Discard that vulgar way of thinking while you’re working,” He barked, though Faye didn’t miss the faint blush Levi sported.

‘He’s a prude’ Faye realized, desperately trying to hide her amusem*nt. “Alright Eren, tell me about what happened and let’s get you cleaned up,” She shifted her attention to her kid brother, whose face had turned crestfallen.

“I-” Faye watched him clench his hands, which were covered in bite marks. “I couldn’t do it,” He had trouble getting the words out, and Faye’s lighthearted smile had dropped into a thin line. “I couldn’t transform into a titan, I’m a disappointment-”

“Alright, kiddo,” Faye interjected quickly, firmly gripping Eren’s shoulder and steering him over to an open cot. “That’s enough self-depreciation for one day, let’s take a look at your hands,” She ordered, shutting Eren’s humiliated face down. “I doubt you know everything about your ability just yet, so give yourself a break,” She firmly commanded, fishing out some alcohol and gauze.

Captain Levi watched with interest as the medic dabbed away the blood covering her brother’s hands before ruthlessly pouring isopropyl alcohol over his hands. Eren sucked in a breath while his hands burned, and forced himself to grit his teeth so as not to groan out in pain.

“Don’t be such a baby, you sh*thead,” Faye muttered, unrolling the gauze and beginning to wrap Eren’s hands. Despite her harsh words, she worked with careful precision and gentle hands.

“Captain, Sir,” Eren addressed, looking up at Levi while Faye wiped the blood from his face diligently. “I’d like to request spending this afternoon’s tea with my sister, Sir,” He asked, sending a resolute stare Levi’s way. It was obvious that despite being a loudmouth, the Captain still managed to ingrain terror into Eren’s soul, or, at least, Eren was trying to make a good impression and not step on any toes.

“Ask your sister instead of me, you degenerate,” He sighed. Sometimes it seemed Eren held the mental capacity of a rock. He felt for Eren, truly. It couldn’t be easy having the social skills of a toddler.

“Ouch, Faye! What the hell was that for?” Eren cried, his forehead throbbing while he held his newly bandaged hands to his forehead.

“For being stupid,” The medic shrugged, innocently smiling at her younger brother. “Also for insinuating that Levi has never had s-”

“Like you’re one to talk,” Eren argued, hotly crossing his arms. “You worked in a brothel for two years,” He accused, pointing a finger down at Faye.

“Enough,” Levi ordered, feeling the start of a headache pounding away. “Stop bickering and start moving. I’m sure the rest of the squad is already waiting for you,” Levi mentioned, tapping his foot impatiently.

“Right, s-sorry, Sir!” Eren rushed to apologize, stuttering over his words as he stood and quickly went to stand by his captain, waiting for Levi to give him an order. Instead, he spun on his heel and made his way around a corner.

“Levi, wait a sec,” Faye called, sprinting towards the Captain. “Eren, we’ll meet you there in a moment, can you ask someone to prepare an extra cup of tea for me, please?” She pleaded, watching Eren’s eyes shift to his captain, silently seeking permission.

When Levi nodded, and Eren continued on his way, Faye grinned up at Levi, opening her palm up. “Anti-inflammatories for your headache,” She revealed, dropping the pills into Levi’s reluctant hand. “If it gets worse, let me know and I’ll get you something stronger,” She earnestly promised.

“Thanks,” Levi grunted, immediately popping the pills into his mouth without a second thought. “We should probably get out there, I’m sure the- What did you call him?” Levi sarcastically questioned. “The sh*thead?” He watched Faye send up a devious smile before he continued. “Is eagerly awaiting your arrival.”

He’d been walking briskly seconds earlier, but he slowed his pace down, leisurely making his way out of the castle beside Faye. It was a comfortable silence, one that he basked in. Too many people chattered away all day, and it was nice to have a moment of peace and quiet with another soul.

“Are you going out to the range tonight?” Gunther grinned when he saw Faye. “I’ve got ten dollars bet on you hitting all of them, but missing on the third.” She’d been working on using the pistols, and while she had a decent grasp on her aim, she still needed a bit of work to refine and perfect it all.

“Not likely,” Faye dryly quipped, taking her spot between Eren and Oluo.

“How are all the physicals going?” Eld politely inquired, a gentle smile on his face while he passed over a small jar of honey. “You and Alexander seemed pretty busy with them for the last few days.”

Faye dipped a teaspoon into the sweetener before she stirred it in, sighing. “Yeah, finished them all last night though, so Al’s got the day off,” Guilt twinged in Faye, but only slightly. “Poor guy had to learn while on the job.”

“I’ve been meaning to ask you,” It was Gunther, and he looked reluctant, the words pausing on his tongue, as though he didn’t want to seem rude. “How’d you make it into the Scouts without any training or experience?”

“Keep your sh*tty questions to yourself,” Levi sighed from the head of the table, irritation etched onto his face. “She’s here on Commander Erwin, Mike, and I’s personal recommendation” Levi flickered his eyes over to the medic to see a small, discomforted frown. “She has exceptional medical knowledge that could prove useful in decreasing our death rate,” His reply had come cooly, and Oluo shrunk into his seat in clear resentment.

“Captain,” Oluo addressed, “If this woman attends the expedition, won’t she just be dead weight?” He questioned, sliding his eyes between Faye and Levi. She felt the rest of the table’s eyes follow suit, glancing between their superiors curiously.

“No, she’s been trained on how to properly use the ODM gear, and she’s aware of what’s at stake if she dies while on the expedition,” Levi firmly stated, silently daring them all to speak up again. Faye scratched her neck uncomfortably, suddenly feeling unwelcome within Levi’s squad. “Eren, how are your hands?” Levi quickly shifted the conversation, glad to stand and step away from the group, sipping on his tea. Eren frowned, looking down at the bandaged hands and shaking his head wordlessly while Levi scoffed. “You’re telling me that your hands show no sign of healing?”

“None, sir,” Eren affirmed. Faye noted the somewhat ashamed and haunted expression that had tiredly settled onto her little brother’s face, and she frowned. There was nothing to feel guilty about.

“No offense, but you’re not much good to us in this form. If you can’t change, our plans for Wall Maria go up in smoke,” He reminded darkly. Faye noted Levi held onto his teacup somewhat strangely. It was the way she might have handled a glass of brandy, but not a teacup. “Pull it together, and yes, that is an order,” He’d spun on his heel, taking a few steps away from the group, eager to peacefully drink his tea, and he inwardly frowned when Petra had followed his lead, lowering her voice to chat with the Captain.

Eren’s eyes turned downcast while he helplessly stared at his bandaged hands, inwardly screaming at his incompetence.

“C’mon, don’t lose heart, kid. You’ll get it,” Eld spoke up, who’d shot a kind smile Eren’s way. He seemed the friendliest out of the Special Operations Squad, along with Gunther, though the latter typically looked to be more on the stoic side - at least, that was what Faye had originally thought when she met him, but after she started shooting bullets, Gunther opened up, and Faye found him to be the funniest of the group.

“Maybe, I don’t know,” Eren mumbled out, tiredly rubbing his forehead.

“Well that’s one hell of a way to learn you’re more human than expected,” Oluo muttered out, stirring his tea boredly.

“Look at it this way, it’s better to find out now than in the field. Back to the drawing board, huh?” Eld asked, his lips settling into a thin line.

“He’s right,” Gunther agreed, staring down at his tea. “No such thing as being too careful when so much is riding on you,” A hard look crossed his face while he continued to peer blankly down at the cup.

A grim silence followed, and Faye numbly sipped on her tea, still reeling from her encounter with Levi’s team. They’d all been so encouraging when she’d been on the range- but ultimately, they were right to be wary. It’s not like they’d watched her training sessions with Mikasa or Levi, and guns were near useless against killing titans unless someone was just trying to slow them down.

She raised her brow when Eren had attempted to lift his spoon-presumably to add in too much honey to his tea, but let out a small groan, his hand spasming, sending the spoon toppling to the ground.

“Is everything okay?” Eld gently asked, sending a worried glance upwards.

“Yeah,” Eren breathed, stretching his body down to pick up the spoon. Only, it seemed to be just out of reach, and Faye’s breath caught in her throat when his fingers brushed the metal's smooth surface.

“Levi!” She barked, throwing herself across the table as sparks flew violently from Eren’s hand, diving out of the way before a hot blast erupted from where Eren had bent over, the steam burning through a layer of Faye’s forearm as she shielded her face. She wasted no time in leaping towards her kid brother but knocked into someone. Eren’s panicked breaths filled Faye’s ears, and she noted with horror that he had only managed to summon the crude head, torso, and right hand with muscle and tissue only wrapping around half of its ribs. It had already begun to steam and melt into itself.

“Dammit, why now?” Eren anxiously questioned the air around him, as if he couldn’t be humiliated any further, desperately tugging on his arm which had been encased by his titan ability.

“Calm down,” Levi ordered, gently letting go of Faye’s elbow, jutting his chin in the direction of her brother.

“I’m sorry, Captain,” Eren exclaimed. “I-I don’t know how I-” Faye had already hopped forwards, carefully standing on its bare ribs to avoid the steam, but Eren stood motionless, gaping down at the sight beneath him.

“The situation is complicated,” Levi reasoned, a hand raised in front of himself defensively, eyeing his four underlings seriously. “Now calm down,” He spoke slowly and resolutely, ordering his comrades to relax for the second time.

Petra’s eyes burned in fury, glaring upwards at Eren and Faye, gritting her teeth in animosity and fear. Faye’s stomach dropped when she realized all four subordinates wore nearly identical expressions, each brandishing their sword threateningly.

“Eren,” Faye quietly addressed, slowly grasping onto his shoulder. “Don’t make any sudden movements,” She advised, heart thrumming almost painfully in her chest. She watched in apprehension as the four had spread out to surround Eren, their swords at the ready while Eren had frozen, his muscles clenched tightly.

“The hell do you think you’re doing?” Eld shouted, raising his sword menacingly. It was a stark contrast from the friendly and gentle blond she’d been interacting with for the last week and a half.

“Sir, please,” Eren tried, only to be cut off again.

“No one gave you permission to transform, did they?” Eld spat venomously, shifting his eyes to Faye. “Are you working for him?”

“I said calm down-” Levi raised his voice, glancing between the four agitatedly.

“Answer Eld, you two,” Oluo ordered. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Leave it, explanations can come later,” Gunther spat, stepping forwards threateningly. “You need to persuade us you’re not hostile like your life depends on it,” He commanded seriously, while Eren let out a shuddered breath. “Prove it or we kill you both, the burden of proof is yours, kids,” He pronounced. Faye’s finger twitched in blistering offense, but she only stared down hotly.

“I’m-” ‘I’m just trying to make sure Eren is alright because that’s my job’ is what Faye had started to snap, only to be interrupted.

“So much as twitch an arm and I’ll lob your head off, this is the first and only warning you’ll receive,” The soldier akin to Levi snarled, pointing his blade towards Faye. “I can end you in a heartbeat, do you understand me, girl?” She’d opened her lips to retort hotly, but Levi beat her to it.

“Oluo,” Levi admonished, finally raising his voice to shout at his comrades. “How many times do I have to say it-”

“Captain,” Petra interjected, shouting over Levi with both of her blades glinting dangerously. “I need you to step away,” Faye’s brows furrowed at the sheen of sweat that slid down her forehead. “You’re too close,” Her eyes shifted somewhat panicked between Levi, Faye, and Eren, and her lips tugged down when Levi tried to argue.

“Right now, I believe you’re the ones who need to step away,” Levi calmly advised, his voice lowering in warning. “Do it.”

“Why on Earth-” Petra attempted to argue but was shut down immediately by Levi again.

“A gut feeling.”

“Eren, you’d better say something,” Threatened the Eld. “You too Faye, we won’t give you another chance.”

Eren had shifted his wide eyes to peer down at his comrade, he froze when another voice cut in.

“Don’t try anything cute,” Oluo advised harshly. “Your sister’s neck is only a swing away.”

“Prove you’re not hostile,” Gunther cried. “Now!”

“Seriously, I don’t-” Eren tried, his voice coming out weakly.

“This is serious, we will kill you,” The Eld declared, taking a threatening step forwards.

“I’ll do it! I swear to God,” Oluo agreed, raising his sword and preparing to slash at Eren.

Faye’s body flung itself forward as the squad continued to terrorize Eren with threats. Her hands came around his torso, effectively shielding his body with hers. Eren realized in horror that Faye’s shoulders were shaking as she hugged him tightly, tears streaming down her cheeks and dripping onto his own. He didn’t even remember the last time his big sister had cried, it was unlike her to be shaken up by mere death threats.

“I love you,” Faye’s voice strained quietly, but Eren heard her loud and clear, and before he could process what he was doing, he’d shifted Faye behind him, and he’d shouted at the top of his lungs, bellowing out:

“Shut up! All of you just be quiet!”

Vaguely, Faye could hear Hange gushing over Eren’s arm, and when she felt him shift again, turning to pull his arm out, she’d launched herself at him again, sending them both tumbling down to the floor with Faye on top, clutching her brother protectively under her. Again, Hange had sounded off about Eren’s titan hand, before footsteps sounded behind Faye, and her breath caught in her throat while another fat tear dripped hotly onto Eren’s cheek.

‘ She’s not afraid for herself ,’ Eren realized in dread. ‘ She’s terrified of losing me ’ Her mind had run through every possibility of getting out of that situation alive, and realistically had come to the same conclusion he had. If he tried to run, they’d no doubt be cut down, so she tried to physically protect him with her own body. She was ready to die in his stead.

A hand gently gripped her elbow, untangling her limbs from Erens and pulling her to stand. “Take a few deep breaths, I promised you I’d keep an eye on him, didn’t I?” Levi reassured, waiting for her to nod before he let go and turned to Eren, who had already begun apologizing. “So, you feeling okay, or what?” He questioned, a small, approving smile adorning his face.

Eren took a few heavy breaths, getting to his hands and knees. “Not exactly, no.” He admitted quietly, still trying to catch his breath.

“Hange, you’re in charge of Eren, I need to-” He cut himself off as Hange had hoisted Eren to his feet, drool primitively running down their chin.

“I got this,” Hange reassured, already pulling Eren away to be further inspected.

“Hey, you stay here and deal with all of this,” Faye tugged on his jacket sleeve, sending up an apologetic smile that made Levi’s heart contract. “I’m just going to go.” She’d already started on her way, and she ignored the captain’s eyes on her back until she made it into her room, where she slumped against the door and tiredly held her face.

*

Petra and Alexander stood in the kitchen, creating some kind of bizarre, meatless stew that had too many potatoes and not enough carrots.

“I just feel bad that we all ganged up on them like that,” Petra sighed, chopping mercilessly at an onion. “You should have seen Faye, it was-” Her spine gave an involuntary shudder. “-Bad. She was crying.”

“Well, why the hell would you guys point your blades at them?” Alex snapped, his eyes flickering from the pot he was stirring to fix Petra with an annoyed glare. “I don’t even remember the last time I saw Faye cry, and not even a month into the job you made her break down? Not cool.” He returned to aggressively stir the broth, letting out an aggravated breath.

“I’ve been trying so hard to be nice to her the last week and a half,” Petra bit her tongue. It was going to sound stupid. “But I just don’t get why you’re so- so- loyal to her.” She was getting bent out of shape over the medic, and she had absolutely no clue why. “She’s just a doctor- not even. She doesn’t even have a medical license, so why is everyone so protective over her? She’s a criminal.”

Alexander clicked his tongue, shaking his head. “You don’t get it. She nearly killed herself for our family, Petra,” He didn’t dare look up at his sister, she’d look too shell shocked, and her emotions would morph with his, and they’d just end up getting into an argument. “It started when she noticed I wasn’t getting fed a whole lot because dad’s business was failing at the time, and whatever leftover money, we sent to you, which left us dirt poor with bills we could barely pay.” The stew had started to boil, and he was quick to turn the heat down. “She started dealing drugs just so she could put more money onto my paycheck, and somehow that snowballed into selling handcrafted poison to a very specia l sort of clientele.”

“Alright, but what does that have to do with you?” Petra challenged, nudging the cutting board over to Alexander, who’d started pouring in the chopped onion and garlic.

“Petra, you weren’t there,” He turned to regard his sister, his lips thinned and his eyes screamed fiercely. “We would have died if Faye hadn’t stepped in, and then she kept stepping in, time after time. I watched her get shot at, and then she cleaned herself up like it was a regular Tuesday evening, and that all happened because one of her customers got upset that she was out of stock on his order.” He ran a hand through his hair, trying to keep from boiling over. “She’s a god-”

“Alright, Alex,” Petra cut in, “Now I know you’re lying. I’ve never heard you refer to anyone as a god- you don’t even believe in a god.”

“I would if Faye were one,” Alexander earnestly confessed. “I’m serious. She’s saved thousands of lives, and she’s killed thousands of lives. She’s got us all in the palm of her hand, and she could just as easily squash us or set us free.”

“But-”

“No,” He spun around from the stew, letting it sit on its own. “I mean it. She’s saved me from loneliness, getting sick, death, starvation, myself,” He huffed out a big breath, turning back to the stew. “Ask Levi to help her out the next time someone gets hurt badly. You’ll see what I mean.”

“What’s going on here?” Levi stood in the doorway with his arms cross, his index finger impatiently tapping his forearm. “Is dinner almost ready, or did you screw it all up like you do your cleaning?”

“Yeah, it’s almost done,” Alexander bitterly grumbled, his back was exceptionally stiff, and his movements came out mechanical. “How’s Faye? Has she come out of her depression cave yet?”

“No.”

“You should go talk to her,” Alex pressed. “She’s probably cleaning her room and scrubbing everything clean.” His lips pursed while he squinted, turning back to the stew. “Don’t give her too much time to get into her head. The second she turns quiet is the second we need to worry.”

Levi retreated without another word, his steps light, though his soul felt heavy.

Faye had been hiding away in her room since the incident earlier that day, and the guilt was eating Levi alive. He was quick in getting to the infirmary, and a silent breath of air left him when he noticed the door was cracked open, leading into Faye’s personal quarters.

“Hey,” He leaned against the doorframe, knocking on the wood. “You alright in there?” He nudged the door open with his foot, his eyes roving around her bedroom.

It was quaint, but something about it screamed inside the deepest pits of his heart that it felt like home. It was clean, and the smell of mint mixed with disinfectant hit his nose like a ton of bricks. She must have sprayed everything down within the last hour. A bookcase was lodged into the corner, though it looked like Faye had multipurposed it in using one shelf for her medical books, and another for her clothes, which had been neatly folded.

Her bed was tucked into the opposite corner, against a window with a large sill where Faye quietly sat, watching the sunset in silence.

“I’m fine,” She sighed, her eyes glued to the scenery.

“May I?” His tone had gone from abrasive to soft- a tone he’d reserved for Erwin and Faye.

She turned just slightly to see Levi motioning to her bed, and she gave a nod, expecting him to cozy himself up on it, but instead, he started to take his boots off, intending to set them down next to her sandals at the foot of the bed.

“Looks like you’ve been busy cleaning,” Inwardly, Levi felt a twinge of irritation at Alexander for being right. Of course, the Ral boy knew Faye better than him, but Levi- something about Faye screamed out into his soul. He was going to add a swear somewhere into his sentence, but he’d decided against it at the last second. He shifted onto the bed before he took a seat next to Faye on the window sill.

“I clean when I’m stressed,” She hummed, unbothered by his presence. “Erwin mentioned you might understand the sentiment, but he didn’t go into detail.”

“Yeah,” Levi breathed, his eyes flickering to the door he’d closed on his way in. “I-” His heart was hammering in his chest, pleading to just be honest about his past. Erwin was the only person who knew about it all, but maybe Faye was trustworthy enough to be bestowed his story. “I grew up in the underground, and everything down there was filthy day in and day out.” He could still smell the sh*t-laced air down there, and his nose wrinkled in disgust. “It was like a cesspool for the dirtiest people, and my-” He cut himself off with a frown. The last time he'd spoken about Isabel and Furlan had been when he broke down to Erwin about it a month after their deaths. "Friends-" He swallowed the lump. It had been years. He could talk about them. "-Thought I was batsh*t crazy for needing our quarters to be kept clean."

Faye spared a glance at Levi, and her breath caught in her throat at how vulnerable he looked. She swallowed, and nodded, not knowing what else to say- what more could she possibly say?

“Why do you clean?” He sensed her hesitation, and he had no problem prying into her reluctance. She was the one who’d brought it up in the first place.

Faye shifted, her hand tired rubbing her cheek, eyes returning to the window.

“When I was a kid, it was do or die.” She let the words hang in the air for a heartbeat before she continued. “I spent a miserable month gunning men three times my age down and watching them kill my comrades. It was a month of blowing snot laced with dirt out of my nose, being covered in mud, and being constantly disgusted with myself. ” She let her shoulders ease up, her chest feeling much lighter. “Then I spent another month outside the walls, and that-” She let out a soft snort, shaking her head. “That was a sh*t show. And when we got into the walls, my whole life fell apart, and everything changed. The only thing I felt like I had some sliver of control was keeping myself clean, and my bedroom.”

“Do or die… That’s why you picked up on the ODM gear so quick then.” Levi’s throat closed in on itself, and she nodded. It explained a lot. He’d been overseeing her training every few days, and she was a natural when it came to learning and utilizing the skills he’d been teaching her, especially on the gear.

“Old habits die hard,” Faye murmured, “I learned to adapt for self-preservation, I guess it’s a reflex now.”

"Some sh*tty reflex," He snorted softly, "You probably went through hell to build that habit." It seemed like every time he learned something new about the doctor, he found himself relating to her in some miniscule way. "At least we have that in common."

"Yeah," Faye nodded to herself. "Everything seemed a lot simpler before Trost fell."

“Why a tea shop?” The question had been slowly burning a hole in his brain for the last week, and when she met his eyes with a grin, he felt his heart flutter.

“I needed to get away from my dad for a bit. We were arguing every day, and my job at the brothel was killing me,” She chewed her lip, flexing her fingers from around her knees. “Tea was the first thing I’d ever prescribed to someone.” Levi wasn’t sure what answer he’d been expecting, but that most certainly wasn’t it. “I was five, and I prescribed a blend of chamomile, valerian root and lavender to a grumpy old woman.”

“You gave me a tin of that too.” Levi swallowed. “It was good. The sh*tty tea works.”

“Glad to hear.”

Levi grunted, giving a curt nod, though he didn’t offer much else, and he turned his eyes to the view outside her window, where the sun had started to get swallowed by the wall in the far-off distance.

“Alexander said to start worrying if you got quiet,” He let out, leaning his head against the wall, his eyes uncharacteristically soft.

“It’s not like I locked the door,” Faye sent a dry smile up. “I’ve just been cleaning. Felt dirty, that’s all.”

“You were crying.”

“My eyes were just leaking,” The doctor insisted. “Nothing to get your panties in a twist over, I promise.” She felt her heart contract before she swallowed the lump in her throat. “I’d tell you and Erwin if I was upset with my job.”

She felt the shift Levi took, but she kept her eyes dutifully trained forward, choosing to evade the eye contact. It would be too vulnerable, and she was sure he’d been looking at her differently since she let him know about her cleaning habits.

“Erwin would insist-”

There was a knock at the door, interrupting Levi mid-sentence, and Faye heaved out a sigh. Her quiet afternoon had just been prematurely terminated.

She was quick to shuffle down from the windowsill and off her bed, sliding on the sandals before she opened the door, raising an eyebrow at Eren, who looked like a child who’d been caught red-handed.

“Um, Commander Erwin is here, and he was asking to see you and The Captain,” She watched in quiet amusem*nt when her brother awkwardly shifted on his feet, especially under Levi’s hard gaze. “He’s just in the foyer, if you want to maybe go see him.”

“Man, it’s unfair that you got all the height genetics,” She grinned, standing on her tippy toes to minimize the height difference while she patted his head. “And you’re still pretty young, so I'd wager you’ll still grow a few inches.”

“Faye! Not in front of Captain Levi,” he swatted her hands away, his cheeks tinged bright red. “He already thinks I’m a brat who can’t clean, come on!”

“That’s because you are a brat who can’t clean,” Faye gave a cheeky smile.

“Enough of your sh*tty sibling rivalry,” Levi interjected, gently tugging on Faye’s elbow for her to follow him. “Let’s go see what Erwin wants.”

It was a short walk, but when Faye rounded the corner with Levi, her legs faltered, and flattery swelled inside her guts.

He looked suave, his shoulders straight, a charming smile on his face when he met Faye’s eyes, and he held a massive bouquet of sunflowers and roses, which probably cost him an arm.

“Good evening,” His chest rumbled from the baritone lilt, and he carried himself with a confident aura. Levi’s squad had all piled into the hallway to watch the scene unfold with curious eyes. “I didn’t know what kind of flowers you liked, so I had to go out on a limb.”

Erwin’s fingers brushed against Faye’s when he held the bouquet out for her, and the breath got lodged in her throat.

“You didn’t have to,” She tried, her lips curling up.

“Consider it a token of my apology and gratitude,” He dug into his pocket where he brought out a small tin, holding it out for Faye, “I also bought you some green tea, not as high quality as yours, but it’ll do.”

“How much did this cost you?” She queried uncertainly, guilt bubbling in the pit of her stomach. “Can you return it? This seems like a lot-”

“Take the sh*tty gift,” Levi snapped. “It’s like the necklace all over again, for f*cks sake.”

“Language.” Erwin chastised.

“Alright you sh*tty old man,” Levi snorted, the sarcasm rolling off him in waves. “Why’d you barge in here anyways?” He’d crossed his arms, drumming his fingers against his arm as though it would help pass the time by faster.

“I was hoping you two would accompany me into town,” He seemed entertained, and it sickened Faye to know she got some sort of bizarre satisfaction at having made The Commander smile in amusem*nt. “I was hoping to get some business done, and I’d like your help.”

Faye shifted her weight, tilting her head. Levi’s lips had thinned, and he didn’t look at all happy about Erwin’s request, though he nodded regardless, and Faye found herself following his lead.

“We’ll leave in two minutes,” Levi decided, spinning on his heel to dismiss his squad, while Faye tried to send a polite smile at Erwin before she turned to make her way to the infirmary to put the flowers in water.

“I hope they’re to your liking,” Erwin had fallen into step with Faye, easily matching her short strides.

“Yeah, they’re beautiful,” Faye assured, “You really didn’t have to though, I was just teasing you.” Her stomach gave a lurch, and she furrowed her brows. “You’re not-” It was a silly thought, really, but the only time a man had gifted her with flowers- “You aren’t- er- courting me, are you?”

Erwin noted the hesitant way she’d spoken, and he raised an eyebrow, wondering why she was so reluctant about the idea. It made perfect sense in his head.

“And if I am?” He challenged, holding the door open for the medic.

“I’d tell you I would make a terrible companion, and an even worse wife,” She retorted, stepping past him and toward her desk. “I can’t even tell you the truth about anything, so I just feel like-”

It made her wary. Like he was just another man from Shiganshina who’d seen her as a conquest.

“Relax,” He’d said it softly, watching her put the flowers into a vase after she’d set the tin down on the corner of her bureau. “It was a peace offering, nothing more.” It was a lie, but if it would quell whatever disquietude Faye had brewing in her head, he was all too happy to appease to her wishes.

“So what’re we going into town for?” She’d switched the subject, turning to face her commander, but instead of seeing the polite smile he usually gifted her with, her heart dropped, and she swallowed thickly.

“John Orwell sent his personal messenger to Calaneth, and I’d like to intercept the letter.”

Chapter 14: 10. Mission Gone Wrong

Chapter Text

The plan had been simple: Faye would act as a diversion on the basis that the messenger knew who she was, and Levi would bump into them and pick the letter out of their coat pocket. Nothing fancy or extravagant.

Still though, Faye’s bones had settled into a pool of dread, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was going to go horribly wrong. Erwin had reassured her numerous times he’d be overseeing the entire exchange from a vantage point atop one of the buildings, but that did little to ease the pit in her stomach.

Levi sat on a bench, his arm draped over the backrest lazily while he held a newspaper in front of him, though his eyes were subtly directed at the civilians leisurely strolling along the cobblestone pathways, looking at what merchants were selling, weaving in and out shops while the sun was still out.

Erwin peered down at the crowd, catching eye contact with Faye. It was fleeting, but he gave a small nod, signaling to her to initiate the plan. His finger stretched out to point to her left where a generally well-built man was lumbering down the pathway, eyes trained forward.

He was easy to pick out, the way he carried himself was a dead giveaway. Not even the MPs or the Garrison walked with that much purpose.

She blew out a heavy sigh, pushing off the brick wall before she started towards him, a bright smile curving her lips up. She avoided his eye, ignoring him completely while she strolled right past him, but she felt the gust of air signaling that he’d turned around to watch her carefully. Her stomach dropped as she realized the man knew exactly who she was, Orwell must have tipped him off at some point or another. Maybe he was even at her court hearing.

She stopped at a window, peering in at a porcelain set of teacups. She watched the reflection, carefully picking up on him leisurely strolling to the opposite side of the road to watch her. He was good, the way he moved nimbly through the civilians, as though he wasn’t spying on her, choosing to busy himself with a newspaper much like Levi had.

She moved two shops down, pretending to inspect a dress in the storefront window.

Levi stalked through the crowds, zeroing in on the muscled man who leaned against a store with a newspaper. The spy kept glancing between the paper and the woman every few seconds, which made Levi's job all that much easier. The short captain turned his head down, moving to round the corner a little too sharply, and he knocked straight into the spy.

“Hey,” The spy frowned, “Watch where you’re going.”

It had all happened in the split second Levi let his body touch the filthy man’s, and he was gone within the instant, blending into the crowds with ease before he ducked into an alleyway and let his ODM gear pull him onto the rooftop.

“He’s stalking her like she’s tonight’s dinner,” Erwin informed, his eyes trained on Faye, who’d dipped into one of the shops. The spy followed after her.

“Disgusting f*cking man,” Levi spat, shoving the letter in Erwin’s direction. “Smelled like piss and bitter resentment.” He settled for kneeling, too on edge to settle in and make himself comfortable. Something was eating away at Levi, this had all been too easy.

Faye, meanwhile, circled around the store, all too aware of the man standing by the door, blatantly staring at her like a piece of meat. She’d gone to uselessly inspect a dinner tray in the corner, avoiding looking over her shoulder. A shiver wracked through her spine as she pulled the cloak tightly to her body, and she made way for the door, her eyes catching on the casual way the spy had asked one of the salesmen about a knife.

Her hand grazed the doorknob before she felt someone grasping onto her waist, and when she turned, her heart dropped. He was holding up a coin, trying to smile innocently.

“Sorry miss, but you dropped this,” He scratched his cheek while he dropped the coin in Faye’s palm, and she thanked him before she turned to leave, eager to put some distance between the two.

Faye’s foot made contact with the cobblestone again, and she glanced over at the building Erwin was supposed to be on before she started making her way back to where the horses had been tied up. Just as she’d rounded the corner into an alleyway, her heart lurched at the sound of footsteps that followed a few paces behind.

She leaped forward just as the shadow pounced, and her fingers went to grasp the pistol in the waistband of her trousers, but she swore when she realized someone had swiped it. She turned just in time to see the man back on her feet, but instead of the spy, she was met with the salesman the spy had been talking to earlier.

“How many of you are there?” She kept her tone guarded, though her heart was racing. Her fingers wrapped around the dagger Levi had insisted she tuck into her boot, and in the moment, she’d never been more grateful for the short captain’s obstinate nature.

“I think you mean ‘Us’,” He hissed, ”After all, we all come from the same place, don’t we?” He took a step forward, threateningly, and Faye bit back a growl.

She kept her knees bent, ready to pounce or dodge the man, but he cracked a chilling grin, one that made the hair on her arms stand, and he pulled out her pistol, pointing it at her.

“Move, and I’ll shoot,” He threatened, while he took another step. His aim was off though, he’d hit her shoulder at best, maybe a little closer to her chest if he was lucky. Something inside Faye’s head snapped into place, and she wet her lips, her brain snapping into survival mode. “I imagined you to be...taller. Something about the way Zeke described you just-” He tilted his head, trying to think of the right word. “Made you seem big, larger than you are.”

Her knuckles tightened on the blade. Just one more step and she could pounce.

“You were a war hero,” He informed. “I heard stories about you when I first entered the Warrior Candidate Program,” The grin he cracked made Faye’s throat constrict. “Kids these days think you’re a legend, you know? Faye Jaeger was supposed to-” He took another slow step, but Faye kept herself grounded. He’d drop his guard and she’d strike, she just needed to be patient. “-be the greatest titan holder in all of history, they’d even debated giving you more than one- sh*t!”

She was quick, the dagger easily slicing through his finger while a bullet went off.

She struck again, aiming for the blade to slide his neck, but he’d moved too quickly- or, maybe she’d moved too slow- whatever it was, she stabbed his arm instead, and he dug a finger into where the bullet had lodged into her abdomen.

The adrenaline was enough to keep her going, sure, but that had been before this man’s grubby fingers nestled into her wound, and a strangled, guttural groan resounded off the cobblestone.

“You’ve gone soft, I thought you were a killing machine,” He derided, yet another finger jabbing into the wound. “Come on, show me why my instructors thought you were a god.”

Her grip tightened on the handle of her dagger, and she breathed in slowly. Her hand swept down with a precise motion, the blood splattering out onto Faye while he clutched his thigh. Her fingers hooked onto the gun, and she slipped it out of his grip while he went down like a sack of potatoes.

“I’m not a god,” She huffed as she staggered against the wall. “I was a scared little girl who thought she would save the Eldians.” Numbness coursed through Faye’s veins as she leaned against the cool cement. He was bleeding out, and there was no saving him. She’d hit the femoral artery on his thigh, an artery that was highly pressurized, and within the next three minutes, he’d be a corpse.

Her stomach was screaming out in pain, and she clenched her teeth. More people should have crowded around to see who had shot a gun, but no one had even glanced toward the alley. Her breathing was labored, and the blistering pain was sending her into a frenzy, her heart pounding a million miles a minute while her breathing picked up the pace.

“Well well, looky here,” Drawled a voice from the opposite end of the alleyway.

Faye’s fingers were going numb while she pressed down on the wound, trying to keep the bleeding to a minimum. “Marley’s famed Faye Jaeger, the one who got away,” The spy took his time in strolling forward, a jovial spring in his step. “Reduced to a woman bleeding out in an alleyway. How pathetic.”

Her body was burning, and she could barely focus on the man. Sure, she’d been shot before, but she’d also been in the comfort of her home where she’d retreated upstairs to clean and sew herself up within the hour, but there, in the alleyway, it had already been two minutes, and she wasn’t going to last without medical attention.

“Zeke will be so glad I nabbed you,” He chuckled, kneeling down in front of Faye. He looked young, maybe in his early thirties. “Ever since Orwell sent word about you, he’s been obsessed with infiltrating the walls,” His hand reached out to pull Faye to her feet, ignoring the pained groan she let slip.

Everything was starting to dim, and she pressed down harder on the hole in her abdomen. She swallowed the lump in her throat while her eyes burned, and she gave a harsh shove to the spy, knocking his hands off of her before she made a run for it.

She’d been fast, but he was quicker, and he spun Faye around like a ragdoll, grinning maniacally at the terror written all over her face.

“What? You don’t miss talking to someone who might understand?” He gave a harsh laugh. “I’ve heard all about your time in the Warrior Program, you were a seasoned vet, according to some.” He was methodical about it, grabbing onto Faye’s wrist and twisting it to force her to her knees. “It’s no wonder you made it all the way to the walls. But you’ve gotten weak, let your instincts rot away to nothing, haven’t you?”

She was being toyed with.

“My instincts haunt me,” Faye grit out. “It took years to stop twitching every time I saw a gun.” It was agonizing being subjected to his ridicule and callous grin. He let out a sharp chuckle, intending to ridicule the illicit doctor, but she knocked her free elbow forward, effectively hitting his nuts and sending him to the ground in a pitiful heap. She heard him swear, but it made no difference. Her hands clawed at the side of his face, and she grabbed onto his ears, ripping downward and taking the protruding skin with her fingers before she forced herself to stand, tossing the remains of his ears to the ground.

War cries reverberated inside of Faye’s head, she could smell the gunpowder and bullets, the muddy trenches. She picked the pistol up before pulling the safety off and squeezing the trigger, putting a bullet into his head.

She couldn’t bring herself to feel anything except the blinding pain, and she staggered out of the alleyway, clutching tightly to her side. No one paid her a second glance as she moved against the crowds, forcing in deep, heavy, slow breaths. Panicking would only make things worse, and she needed to stay conscious until she could deal with the bullet inside her.

“sh*t, Faye,” Levi swung down the second he laid eyes on her, the woman was covered in blood, and the heavy look in her eyes made him question if she was really the same doctor he’d come to somewhat know. “Where is it? You okay?”

“Just get me to the infirmary, please,” She mumbled, lips pulled thin. “I have a bullet playing house in my abdomen, and I’d like to evict it as soon as possible.”

“What?” His eyes had widened considerably as he swiveled his eyes to stare down at where her hands were clutching, and his mouth went dry. “Hospital. sh*t, let’s get you to the nearest hospital.” He waved for Erwin to come down, and he looped his hand around Faye’s torso, forcing her to lean on him. “Come on, stay with me.”

“No hospital, just get me home. I’ll do it myself,” She stubbornly dismissed. “It’s only a ten-minute ride there, so let’s hurry this up already.”

Erwin’s arms mirrored Levi’s as he came to help. “What happened? I thought you were looping back around?” They’d all started to move forward.

“I got shot,” Faye growled. “f*ckers thought it was all a game and I killed both of them.” Neither of the men missed the wince or the crack in her voice. “They knew who I was and- sh*t,” her knee caved in, though Levi and Erwin made sure to keep her upright.

“Focus on making it back to the castle,” Erwin ordered, his eyes hard. “You can tell us about it when we know you aren’t in mortal danger.”

“Erwin, this looks serious, she might not make it to the castle,” Levi hissed, his lips pulled down into a fierce scowl. “Get her to the f*cking hospital, it’s closer and we can at least monitor her.” His eyes softened for a split second when Erwin peered over at him, and quieter, he urged, “Please.”

“I don’t like the hospitals here,” Faye slurred, “They- they’re awful. They’ll put me under, I gotta-” She wrenched her hands in front of herself, and before either of the men could stop her, she pulled her pinky back, and she let out a slew of curses. Her actions yielded the desired results though, and her eyes had turned wide while the adrenaline coursed through her body.

“What the hell, Faye?” Levi snarled, grabbing her uninjured hand away from herself. “Why would you break your own finger?”

“You’re afraid of passing out,” Erwin mumbled out, and by the way Faye’s back stiffened under his hand, he knew he was right. “Levi is right though, the hospital is only a block away and- stop wiggling or I’ll knock you out myself.” He threatened lowly.

Faye abated, though she shot up a glare, and she allowed herself to be dragged along the streets. The hospital was small, especially compared to the ones in Marley, but when Faye was hauled through the door, the nurses were on top of her like a swarm of flies, and she bit her tongue to keep from snapping at them.

Of course, when they got her onto the bed, and Faye caught sight of the needle one of the nurses was handling, her reaction was instantaneous, and she leaped up from the bed like a wild animal, backing away.

“Get that thing away from me,” She glowered, her hands pulled into fists. “I mean it, give me your supplies and I’ll patch myself up.”

“Ma’am, you’re in no condition-”

“Let me inject myself,” Faye swallowed. “I’ve seen enough people get stabbed by them, and I refuse to be part of the masses.”

“Get The Commander and Captain,” The nurse ordered, pursing her lips.

Her throat had gone dry, and her eyes glanced around the room, searching for some form of escape. This was stupid. She was a doctor, for f*cks sake, she could take care of herself better than any of those nurses would

“Faye,” It was Erwin who’d called her name, taking small steps forward with Levi hot on his trail. “You need to let these nurses do their job,” His voice was soothing, but it only made Faye tense more, her jaw clenching. She was backed into a corner like a wounded dog.

“I’ll do it myself,” She tried, but Levi cut her off.

“Look at your hands,” He prompted apathetically. “You’re shaking like a leaf. You can’t do sh*t right now, so let these people help you.”

“No-” She shook her head vehemently, “I’ll be okay, look, I’m not even tired anymore,” It was a lie, her muscles were practically screaming out for her to just sit down and be catered to, but the fear- the absolute bone-chilling terror kept her from relaxing. “Just- sh*t. Just get me home, and I’ll patch myself up.”

Levi and Erwin shared a glance, one that made Faye’s stomach curdle. They both took a step forward, and Faye took another back.

“Don’t do this to me,” She pleaded. “I swear, I’ll be okay, just-” Another step, and Faye’s back hit the wall. “Just don’t. I’m fine, really.”

“It’s going to be alright,” Erwin reassured. “Let’s talk about this. Why are you so afraid of the needle?”

“Shiganshina,” Faye reminded. “I can’t exactly spill everything on a whim. Just take me home and you can enjoy some tea while I-” Levi pounced forward, his arm pinning her chest against the wall, but Faye saw it coming, and she muttered out a quick apology while her own hand came up, hitting the spot where his chest met his shoulder.

She was a whirlwind, and Erwin’s brows furrowed at how swift and quick she moved, the precision she dealt. Levi’s lips opened to swear, but Faye had already moved on to ducking low, avoiding his other hand, and her elbow rammed into the captain’s ribs.

She was out the door before anyone could stop her.

Faye was panicking. It was rare that she let her emotions overflow, but the situation warranted it. She could vaguely make out the calls of the medical professionals calling for help, but it made no difference to Faye. She was working purely on instinct, and it was more dangerous for them than it was for her.

She blew through the front doors of the hospital, veering off into an alleyway before she took a left, heading further into the heart of town. Calaneth District was big, there was bound to be a store where she could find decent medical grade equipment to treat herself.

Meanwhile, Erwin helped Levi to his feet, gently pulling him up.

“She’s acting like a loose cannon,” Erwin softly murmured. “I’m sorry I pulled you into this.”

“f*ck off,” Levi wheezed, clutching at his ribs. “We shouldn’t- I should have listened to her. How many times did she say she didn’t want to go to this sh*tty hospital?” He got a little too worked up and his lungs burned, forcing Levi to hunch over and cough.

Erwin patted Levi’s back in an attempt to help him, but it only earned a glower.

“Are you feeling up to finding her? We can’t leave her out on the streets to bleed out.” If Erwin was to be honest, he’d tell Levi his mind was still reeling from Faye’s stunt earlier. He’d never seen her in action before, but she was quick, light on her toes, but more lethal than he could have ever anticipated. She knocked her elbow into Levi’s ribs with just enough force to wind him, but not severely damage his bones or lungs. “She’s too valuable.”

“Oi,” Levi huffed. “Don’t go putting her on a pedestal like you did with me.” He forced his back to straighten out despite his ribs begging him to rest. “Let’s go find the sh*tty doctor. You take the west and I’ll take the east.” He’d already started for the door, his eyes narrowed and his lips pulled down in an irritated frown.

“We should probably try to hurry, we don’t know if there are more people looking for her,” Erwin mentioned from beside Levi.

“Just f*cking go already, I’ll start in a second.” Levi rolled his shoulders back, ignoring the erupting pain that felt like someone was stabbing him from the inside out. He flexed his hand, or, tried to. It twitched in response, and it felt disembodied. He should have seen that move coming, she’d already hit him with it once before.

He took to the rooftops scowling, but something twinged to life inside of the short captain. Morbid curiosity, perhaps. Whatever it was, it made him backtrack to the alleyway Faye had stumbled out of, and his brows knitted together to see Erwin already standing there, surveying the gruesome scene splayed on the floor.

“You too?” Levi grunted, pushing his feet forward.

“Did she say if she got shot before, or after she killed the first one?” Erwin inquired, his eyes glued to the bodies.

“No clue.” Levi stood next to Erwin, eyes roaming around to inspect the blood, which had soaked into the ground and walls. If Levi had grown up on the surface, he was sure he would have heaved the contents of his stomach up at the scene.

One body laid in the middle of the alley, a finger just next to his head while his thigh looked to have bled out. His eyes were open and glassy, but his mouth was curved into a gratified smile, like he’d seen all there was to see in the world. The other one - the spy- was closer to the wall, his head was bloody though, and his ears had been gruesomely torn away from his head. A single bullet wound to the head was likely what had killed him- he couldn’t see Faye wasting bullets just for sh*ts and giggles.

“She wasn’t even here for five minutes, and look at the destruction she single-handedly caused,” Erwin sounded impressed, and Levi didn’t need to look up to know the twisted smile he wore. “She might just be as talented as you.”

“Don’t call it a talent,” Levi growled. “It’s a curse.”

“My apologies,” Erwin sent down an apologetic smile, “I’m just amazed at it all, I don’t think I could-”

“Where do we meet up when we find her?” Levi shifted uncomfortably. He didn’t want to hear Erwin’s sh*tty apologies, he’d heard enough of them over the years, and it felt like they’d finally gotten past that in the last few years.

“At the castle, if neither of us locates her in an hour, we’ll return regardless. It’s entirely possible she headed back without us.” He gave Levi a curt nod before he took off to the rooftops.

“sh*tty f*cking doctor,” Levi huffed under his breath, following Erwin’s stead, but leading a different direction. “This town is disgusting, and-”

Not even a block away, and there she was, sitting on a bench with a small bag next to her, dousing her stomach in what he could only assume was disinfectant.

Never in Levi’s life had he turned away from a scene so fast, grappling back in Erwin’s direction, where The Commander was perched on a rooftop.

“Oi,” Levi hollered. “Found her, she’s two blocks that way,” He jutted his thumb back, beckoning Erwin to follow close behind.

Faye, meanwhile, had finally calmed her heart, forcing in deep, slow breaths as the curved needle pierced through the skin, and she pulled the suture thread out the other side. This was infinitely better than having a stranger work on her. She tied it neatly, her tongue tracing her teeth.

“Are you going to do anything about your pinky?” Erwin inquired, taking a seat next to Faye just as Levi took up residence on her other side.

“I will, but I’d like to sew this thing up first,” She glowered, mood dampening as she started with the hooked needle again. “It’s hard to focus when you’ve got a gaping hole in your stomach.”

Levi stared down at the bloody bullet, which rested by Faye’s feet. Her hands were covered in blood- likely her own, and he saw no evidence of tweezers. His stomach sunk. She’d pulled the bullet out with her fingers. His eyes flickered back to her hands, but he had to look away, the sight was making him nauseous.

“Your hands are still shaking,” Levi murmured.

“They’ll stop eventually,” Faye shrugged with one shoulder. “Maybe next time you’ll listen when I tell you I can patch myself up instead of threatening and forcibly dragging me into a hospital that reeks like third-rate disinfectant.” Her words cut deeper than a knife, and Levi’s breath caught in his throat while he solemnly nodded, not knowing what more to say.

The three fell into an uncomfortable silence, one in which Faye kept grinding her teeth together to keep the groans of pain in her throat.

“You’d better make sure the next bouquet you bring has campanpulas in it,” Faye muttered out, tying off the last stitch. “And jasmine tea.”

“Campanpulas?” Erwin's brow twitched.

“Yeah, they grew like weeds in Shiganshina, and they’re my favorite flower,” Faye’s shoulder’s rolled back while she grabbed a pencil, handing it over to Levi. “Snap this in half, please.” She didn’t spare a second glance to either of them while she unrolled some gauze, thanking Levi for the pencil.

“Are you angry with us?” Erwin straightforwardly asked, his heart hammering in his chest.

“More annoyed than anything,” Faye admitted, carefully aligning one half of the pencil under her pinky. “I’m tired, I need a bath, I’m covered in blood that isn’t even mine, and if I’m being honest, I’m starting to remember a little too much about my childhood.” She started wrapping the gauze over the pencil and pinky, keeping it tight, but not enough to cut off her circulation. “Things I’d have liked to not think about.”

“Earlier,” Levi swallowed the lump in his throat, guilt eating away at his conscience. “You said you shot men, and you watched your teammates be gunned down, is that what you’re thinking about right now?” He knew he shouldn’t have even asked, if he were in her position, it would have been the last thing he wanted to discuss.

“Yeah, as a matter of fact,” She tucked in the gauze, turning her hand to inspect. “I’ve got thousands of people haunting my ass, and I heard them all scream when I added two more to the numbers.” She pulled her shoulders back, slumping on the bench. “They’re all disgusted with me,” She shuttered out a breath. “And I can’t say I don’t share the sentiment.”

*

The letter, as it had turned out, was all in Marleyan.

"Mission Report:

Candidates in place and ready for Marley's signal.

Engage small village to south, do not linger.”

The letters were all different, and it took Faye a solid five minutes to sound it out and decipher. Didn’t help that whoever wrote it had haphazardly scribbled it all down, and the ink had smudged on several letters.

When Erwin had asked how she knew to read the letters, she shrugged, telling him she’d grown up in the same circles the spies ran in.

Then she promptly went to sleep.

Truly, it felt like every time Faye actually needed the sleep, it was interrupted within what felt like the blink of an eye.

“Wake up!” Levi hissed. “Zachary is here, wake the f*ck up!”

“What the hell are you talking about, Levi?” Faye groaned, still a little loopy on the painkillers she’d taken the night before. “Why would Dhalis Zachary be here of all places?” She dug her head into her pillow, muttering out a low “Stop screwing around and let me sleep.”

“Oi!” Levi snapped, gently tugging at her elbow. “He’s going to come up here any second so get your ass out of bed,” He ripped the blankets off of Faye.

“Alright, alright,” Faye conceded. “I’m getting up right now,” She rolled her shoulders back, carefully sitting up. “Go stall him or something-”

“Eren and Alexander are already doing that-”

Faye’s eyes snapped up in sudden alertness.

“Why would you let Al’ anywhere near the guy?!” She cried, stumbling to her feet a little too quickly, thankfully Levi caught her. “He’s awful when it comes to stalling people and-” She paled. “-He’s probably asking about his sex life-”

“sh*t,” Levi grunted, his back stiffening while he steadied Faye. “I’ll go down there and send him up to help you instead or-”

“No need,” Came the Premier’s voice from the threshold separating Faye’s bedroom from the infirmary. “I’ve already dismissed both Mr. Ral and Mr. Jaeger for the time being, I hope you don’t mind.”

“That’s fine, sir,” Levi rigidly replied, his tone hard. “I’ll have my team prepare Faye some tea and leave you to it, then.”

It was bizarre to see Levi being so compliant to someone in a position of authority. Even with Erwin, he was blunt about how he felt, even if he said it awkwardly, or didn’t say anything at all.

“Mr. Dhalis,” Faye didn’t bother calling him by his last name, or a proper title. Gave him too much authority. “I hope you don’t mind if we move this to the infirmary, I’d like to check my wound and take a few painkillers.”

“Not at all,” Zachary swept forward, offering Faye a hand. “I’d expect that much.”

Faye cringed when her hand met The Premier’s, a fleeting flash of Dhalis leering at a man who’d been hung upside down with what looked like a funnel shoved into his rectum rippling through her mind too quickly to properly digest. Her hand ripped itself off of Zachary’s skin out of instinct, and she froze under his inquisitive stare.

“Muscle spasm, sorry,” She mumbled, replacing her hand and letting the older man guide her to her desk. “There’s a chair near the door if you’d like, or you can take one of the beds,” She offered, already rummaging around in her drawers for disinfectant and salve. “Can I ask what you’re doing here, or is that a little too forward?”

Zachary chuckled, grabbing the aforementioned chair and dragging it to sit a few feet away from Faye.

“Commander Smith sent word to Commander Dok, who, unfortunately, had other business to attend to today, and I offered to interrogate you about yesterday,” He’d taken his jacket off, folding it neatly before he set it down on the bed and took a seat on the chair, rolling his sleeves up.

“I’m not sure which I would have rathered,” Faye bluntly admitted, slouching and rolling her shirt up to check the wound. “Mr. Dok is easier to read, and he scares me less than you do.”

“I scare you?” Dhalis canted his head at the woman curiously.

“Maybe scare wasn’t the right word,” Faye gave a thoughtful hum. “You make me uneasy,” She grabbed the disinfectant, pouring it over the stitches. “I can’t get a good read on you, and you don’t strike me as the person to lay their true intentions on the table for others to see.” Her mind blinked with Zachary’s leer she’d seen in her vision, wincing.

“Very wise of you,” Dhalis agreed. “Would it settle your nerves more if I divulged I feel the same way about you?”

Faye raised her brow, glancing up from the jar. “A bit,” She used a wooden depressor to scoop out some salve. “I try to be blunt when I can, though I doubt I’d do as well as you in politics.”

Dhalis chucked, watching as Faye held the wood between her teeth while she screwed the jar shut. “I think you’d gain popularity among the crowds,” He shrugged.

“Doubtful,” She started to slide the ointment off the wood and onto her stomach, massaging it carefully overtop the stitches. “Anyone who favors a mass murderer should be checked into a mental ward and have their psyche heavily evaluated.”

“So you admit to killing them all, then?” His eyebrows raised. Faye had his interest piqued, and she drew him in like a moth to flame.

“Yeah, I’ve been killing people since I moved to Trost ten years ago,” She noted the glimmer in Dhalis’s eyes, it sent a ripple of disgust through the pit in her stomach. “But I’m sure you’ve already read over my case file, so I’m not sure why it’s being brought up now.” She cut a piece of gauze, taping it securely overtop the wound before rolling her shirt back down and sitting up, rolling her shoulders to straighten out.

“You’d be surprised at how notorious you are,” The Premier stated, all too aware of the way Faye crossed her legs in discomfort. There was no surprise there, and apparently, the fame ran beyond the walls. “I’ve been hearing about your victims for the last five years, and it’s only been in recent months your name started making its way onto my desk every morning.”

A knock clipped at the door, with Faye calling for them to come in. Levi strolled in with a tray of tea, he looked stiff and just as uncomfortable as Faye felt.

“Do you mind grabbing me the acetaminophen out of the cupboards?” Faye politely asked, “It’s just in the top left.” Levi gave a curt nod, his footsteps echoing on the stone. Just his presence made Faye ease her shoulders and let out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “Thanks,” Levi’s hand brushed hers when he dropped the container into her hands.

“Tea is hot, so be careful,” He warned, strolling out the door without another word.

Faye blinked, before she opened the container, “So… Do I want to know what your soldiers have been writing about me in their reports?” She took out two tablets, popping them down her throat while she poured some tea.

“It started with Commander Dok-thank you-” Faye had nudged over a cup for Dhalis before she started on her own. “He was very adamant that you were the culprit behind many of the poisonings, and when Trost was breached, the evidence all but fell into his lap.”

The illicit doctor took a languid sip of tea, pleasantly surprised to find it had been a jasmine blend from her store- something she’d been craving as of yesterday.

“Not to be rude, but you haven’t asked me very much about what happened yesterday,” Faye cut in. “I’m well aware Nile Dok had been hunting me like a rabbit for the last few years, and I’m sure he was relieved to have finally caught me.”

“But did you know Erwin has written several reports about you?” He leaned in, just slightly. “Detailing how you conveniently found Mike Zacharias on the street and sewed him up-”

“Listen,” Faye rubbed a weary hand over her temple, the start of a headache throbbing below the skin. “If you’re implying I knew who Mike was before I picked him up, you’d be sorely mistaken,” She didn’t raise her voice, but she sounded exhausted, like the absolute life had been sapped straight from her veins. “I tripped over his leg, saw he was bleeding, he sniffed me, I made a few sarcastic comments, he threatened to turn me in, and then he came back because he pulled a muscle in his back. He’s like an annoying older brother, or an uncle to me now. I don’t know what else you want me to say.”

“And Commander Erwin and Captain Levi?”

“Who knows,” Faye shrugged.

“How does a fifteen-year-old start and maintain an illicit business for ten years where she procures poison for criminals?” Zachary questioned, amusem*nt curving his lips up subtly.

She let out a big sigh, “It was just a matter of making connections and working my way up the food chain. Are we going to actually get around to discussing yesterday, or are you just dragging this out because you enjoy watching me squirm?”

“I saw the scene, quite the display,” Dhalis confessed. “One missing a finger, and the ears ripped off the other. Was it done out of malicious intent, or was it self-defense?”

“I’d like to claim self-defense,” Faye swallowed. “I was the one getting attacked.”

“Done then. Consider your record absolved,” Zachary stood, coming to his full height, watching as Faye followed his lead, but she groaned when her skin pulled, and she steadied herself against the desk.

“That’s it?” Faye questioned. “No slap on the wrist, or execution?”

“Not today,” Dhalis sent a polite smile which vaguely resembled the guarded, tight-lipped one Erwin usually gave when he wanted a conversation to end. Unfortunately for Zachary, Faye didn’t give two sh*ts about his subtle warning to drop the subject.

“What was the point of this chat then? Don’t tell me it was just to meet the Scouting Regiment’s new captain.” Something about this visit wasn’t sitting right with Faye, it should have dragged on longer, she should have been given some sort of punishment.

“I owe Erwin a favor, and he’s decided to ask me to pardon you,” Zachary admitted, pulling his jacket on. “Though I’ll be honest when I say you intrigued me enough to want to meet you.”

“When did I gain your interest?” Faye’s heart was thrumming, a lump forming in her throat.

“Your brother’s court hearing. I knew who you were, but I was surprised to see you put yourself in the spotlight when it could have spelled out your death.” Dhalis wet his lips, meeting Faye’s eyes. “Someone who was truly guilty and deserving of punishment wouldn’t have done that.”

“I am though,” Faye countered. “You saw those men from yesterday-”

“All swept under the rug, I assure you,” Another smile. “You look distressed, you should rest.”

“Dhalis,” Faye’s fingertips twitched, “I meant it when I said you make me uneasy.” Her eyes were just slightly wider than usual, and he could tell by the subtle way she wiped her palm on her shorts that she was sweating. “Just- stop with the political bullsh*t for one minute and tell me why you went out of your way to have a conversation with me. Nile Dok could have just as easily rescheduled or had me escorted to Mitras to be detained and properly interrogated.”

“I’ll be sure to send your warm regards to Commander Dok,” He assured, nearly spinning on his heel to exit, but Faye’s words startled him into freezing.

“Your idea for a torture weapon,” She licked her lips, evenly meeting his eye. “It’s inhuman.”

“It’s meant for people who act like animals,” He smiled- and Faye’s blood chilled. “I hope you stay out of enough trouble to avoid it in the future.”

“If I don’t, I hope you’ll find mercy in your heart for me,” She swallowed thickly.

“Not likely.” He went to turn, but he froze once more, turning to watch the short woman. “You won’t salute?”

“Not for you.”

*

Petra’s hand rapped against the door, while she nervously shifted. This was stupid, but Alexander had piqued her interest, and she couldn’t ignore her curiosity much longer.

“Petra?” Faye blinked, a blank look crossing her features. “What’s up? It’s almost dinner time, are you feeling nauseous or something?”

“No, no,” Petra shook her head, waving her arms while she stood in the doorway. “I-” Her cheeks burned. “I was just- you see, Alexander… He- well,” She was a stuttering mess, not knowing how to put her thoughts into a coherent sentence. “I was just wondering if maybe you’d- You’ve been at the castle for ten days already… I was thinking-”

“I was just on my way to the shooting range,” Faye started slowly. “Would you like to come with me? I’ve got an extra rifle if you’d like.”

“Yes!” Petra nearly jumped. “You read my mind. Would it be okay if I tagged along? I don’t have a lot of experience with guns, but you’re such an expert, and Alexander speaks so highly of you.”

“Yeah, give me a minute to go grab it and we can head over together,” Faye grinned. She disappeared back into her room for a few seconds before she jogged back, handing the extra rifle to Petra. “So what’s up? Did you get a front-row seat to Alexander and Eren attempting to stall Zachary?”

Petra let out a small laugh, nodding, her shoulders relaxing. “I got secondhand embarrassment.” She confessed, falling into step beside Faye. “Eren kept stuttering, and Alexander tried to step in to save Eren, but it turned into Alexander asking The Premier if he was gay and available.”

“Well that’s one way to start off strong,” Faye snorted. “Did he do the thing where he tries to go baritone, but halfway through the sentence his voice cracks?”

“Yes! And then he tried to cover it up with a cough, but I guess he started choking on the spit and he started coughing for real,” It felt natural to chat so casually with Faye. “Then Zachary tried to excuse himself, but Eren panicked and started talking about his friend Armin?”

“Yeah, he’s a genius in a fifteen-year-old's body,” The doctor admitted.

“Eren said as much, mentioned he might be next in line to take Zachary’s job, and that’s when The Premier cut in and told them they were dismissed from duty for the next hour.”

“What a bunch of idiots,” Faye huffed. “How’d Levi react?”

“Eren is on stable duty for the rest of our stay here, and Alexander is stuck on meal prep for the next week,” Petra shrugged. “Captain didn’t seem very impressed when he stormed down the stairs to chew them out, and I can’t really blame him.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen Levi in a seriously bad mood,” The medic thoughtfully said. “Sure, he gets grumpy sometimes, but the few times he’s hissed out an insult, he’s never been scary or intimidating about it.” It was true, all the times he’d been angry, it wasn’t like Faye felt like she was in any serious danger. “He sort of reminds me of a mother disappointed with her child when he’s upset.”

“I don’t know,” Petra drawled. “He has his moments. Eren is definitely afraid of him.”

“That’s because you’re all on duty to literally kill him if he goes rogue,” Faye reminded. “Yesterday was probably a good eye-opener for him.” ‘And for me too’

“I’d like to apologize for that,” Petra nervously murmured. “I think the fear hit us, and we all moved on instinct. And- and I’m sorry. You were crying, and after you left I felt like I killed a baby, and Alexander- he made it worse-”

“Petra, calm down,” Faye gently held onto Petra’s upper arm, giving a reassuring squeeze. “You guys were just doing your job, I can’t hold that against you.”

“Still,” The ginger wet her lips, heart hammering away inside her chest. “And before that too… I-” She hesitated, brows furrowing. “I accused you of some very awful deeds, and I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” The doctor let go of Petra’s arm, continuing the stroll to the makeshift shooting range. “No harm, no foul, right?”

“I literally punched you when we first met?” Petra reminded questioningly.

“I deserved it,” Faye shrugged. “Call it karma.”

“Faye, I mean it, I really am sorry-”

“Apology accepted.” Faye dismissed. “Drop it, and we’ll call it even.”

Petra sucked in a breath, annoyance fraying her patience, but she nodded nonetheless, and the rest of the walk to the range was Faye giving a short explanation of the rifle.

“Let’s start off close, just so you can get a feel for how to aim,” Faye suggested, walking a few meters away from the cans. “I learned by leaning on the ground for more stability and to get used to the kick of it, so I’d say-” She kneeled down, checking the softness of the ground. “-This is a decent spot.”

“How old were you when you first learned?” Petra inquired, following Faye’s lead and nestling in on the ground with the rifle.

“Five.” The medic positioned the gun in the crook of Petra’s shoulder, “You need to relax your shoulders, but keep them squared, and then-” She leaned in close to Petra, biting her lip while she shifted the soldier’s fingers just slightly. “-Try and aim for one of the cans. It’s pretty nice out today, and the wind isn’t awful, so you shouldn’t have to worry too much about the weather changing the bullet’s trajectory.” The words all sounded like gibberish, but Petra nodded nonetheless, pointing the barrel of the rifle at the middle can. “Pull the safety, and then gently squeeze the trigger. You’ll feel the kickback, but it shouldn’t be too bad since you’ve got it in a stable position.”

Petra followed Faye’s instructions, to the tee, the trigger pulling back while the shot made her ears ring. The can hadn’t moved an inch though, meaning her bullet had missed.

“Alright,” Faye leaned her shoulders back, adjusting Petra’s gun. “Take a deep breath,” She nudged it a little more to the right and up, “And on the exhale, squeeze and try again.”

The redhead's lungs inflated, and Faye watched with avid eyes as her finger drew the trigger back, the sound didn’t bother the medic much, it never had, and she watched the can go flying.

“I...did it,” Petra breathed, eyes wide. “I- that was only my second try, holy sh*t!”

“Try it on the one to the left,” Faye urged, once again helping Petra adjust.

The two spent their afternoon together, taking shots at cans and chattering.

Chapter 15: 11. Yikes

Chapter Text

“That does sound like a horrifying vision,” Erwin agreed, leaning back on his chair. Sunlight had filtered in through Faye’s large window in her bedroom and bathed Erwin in a warm glow while Levi sat just to the left of him, narrowly avoiding the bright sun. “And you said you asked Zachary about it point-blank?”

Faye gave a nod, sitting against her headboard where the light didn’t quite reach. “Didn’t even deny it, just gave me this...smile, and told me to stay out of trouble.” His smile, the curve Zachary’s lips took - it was twisted and demented, and it sunk into her head like quicksand. She’d dreamed about it before she’d woken up in a cold sweat. There were most definitely a few screws loose in his head.

“Interesting,” Erwin hummed. “In the meantime, I need you to rest up, do you think you’ll be fully healed in time for the expedition?”

“I’ve actually been meaning to talk to you about that,” Faye fiddled with her blanket, feeling awfully small. “I don’t think Alexander should go.” Stunned silence hung in the air while Faye sucked in a deep breath. “I was thinking about giving him until next week to see if he can stick a landing on the gear, but if he can’t properly use it, he’ll be more of a hazard.”

“I’ll have a post designed for him to do some paperwork until we get back in the Calaneth District,” The blond assured. “But you dodged my question, do you think you’ll recover in time?”

“Yeah, it’s already been two days and I’ll be able to take the stitches out tomorrow or the day after,” She shrugged, lifting her shirt for Erwin and Levi to inspect. The wound looked clean, and there was no sign of infection. “My pinky feels better too. I’d wager it’ll be another five-ish days before I can take the splint off.”

“And mentally?” Levi inquired, grunting as he shifted on the chair.

“It’s… I’m on my way to recovery,” Faye mumbled out. “I went shooting with Petra yesterday, and all I could see was the spy with a clean bullet to his forehead.” It was a subtle motion when she wiped her hands on the sheets, and Levi frowned.

“You still feel like you’ve got their blood on your hands.” It had meant to come out as a question, but the tone in his voice was too hard, and instead, it sounded more like a statement.

Faye shrugged, bottling her guilt for the time being. “Not much I can do about it now, so I’m just trying to move past it.” She hadn’t answered his question, and both men narrowed their eyes at her evasion.

Erwin startled her, his hand gently grasping her shoulder while he leaned in with an apologetic smile. “If there’s anything we can do to help, just let us know.”

Faye stared directly into his eyes, nodding. It was one of the few moments Erwin had let his guard down and allowed himself to be sincere and genuine, so she felt like it was expected she returned the sentiment.

“I will,” Her head bobbed while she swallowed. “Thank you, for everything. Both of you.” She glanced between the two. “I’d probably be dead by now if you guys hadn’t taken me in during my hearing.” She would have been executed if Erwin had declined to take her in…

“Stop your sh*tty blabbering,” Levi cut in, “You’re acting like you haven’t saved Mike and I’s life already.”

“Levi is right,” Erwin interjected, clamping a hand onto the short captain's shoulder to ease his harsh attitude. “You’ve proven yourself to be a valuable asset to our team, and it would have been a great loss to the regiment if you had decided not to join.”

“Did you guys make any leeway with the letter?” Faye tactfully switched the subject. “Seemed kind of important.”

"Not yet," Erwin gave a small smile. “Speaking of letters,” His eyes were sparkling, glinting in the sunlight with his usual, cool curiosity, his hand rummaging around in his jacket. “This,” He flicked his hand out, holding an envelope for Faye to take. “Came for you this morning.”

He watched Faye’s head tilt, and he slid his tongue over his lips when she carefully pulled a knife off her dresser to break the wax seal. He’d been waiting all morning just to see what was written inside, and the only reason he hadn’t opened it himself was out of respect for the doctor. (A grace most people were never bestowed with.)

Faye’s jaw tightened, and she swallowed, glaring down at the paper before she held it out for Erwin to take back.

‘My dearest Faye,

How is life within the Scouting Regiment treating you? Bloody, I hope.

My days are numbered, and with my wife’s recent passing, I’ve found myself whittling away the time until I, myself, finally kick the bucket. Unfortunately, I fear my days are numbered, and as such, I’d like to see my nephew and niece one last time. Of course, you’re also considered family at this point, and I would be thrilled if you came along for the visit too.

I’ll be in Calaneth in a day's time when this letter reaches you. If it so happens to align with your schedule, I’d be grateful to see you one last time. I’m staying at the inn on the southern border of town, stop by whenever suits your needs.

-Crazy Uncle John Orwell’

“Are you going to go?” Levi quirked a brow, leaning back in his seat while his fingers drummed his arm agitatedly.

“I think I could talk to him about Marley’s plans,” She carefully stated.

“No.” Levi scowled. “You’re just going to get shot again.”

“Well, why did you ask then?” Faye gave her fellow captain an annoyed glance, her hands motioning up into the open air dramatically. It was too early for Humanity’s Grumpiest to be actively getting on her nerves.

“Do you think you could actually get a straight answer from him?” Erwin leaned his elbows on his knees while he rested his chin on his hands with a thoughtful look. At least he was actually thinking it through instead of shooting Faye down as Levi had.

“His spies said some interesting things,” She swallowed her hesitancy. “Apparently I’m well known in their circles, and they want to reunite me with my brother,” ‘Or country…’ Her fingers twitched, and she forced a deep exhale. “If he’s going to open up to anyone, it’s going to be me.”

“Erwin,” Levi’s head swiveled around to look at his commander incredulously. “You can’t really be considering this. The sh*tty doctor hasn’t even healed yet.” His eyes flickered back to Faye, and he caught eye contact, silently pleading with her not to go.

“It’s not like I’ll be going alone,” She clipped. “Al’ might be a bit useless when it comes to fighting, but Petra’s got a decent chance of-”

“This is a sh*tty idea,” Levi tried again. “You’re putting my soldier into harm's way for a selfish agenda, you sh*tty doctor.” His voice was low and menacing, and the lines beneath Levi’s eyes seemed to deepen the longer he was subjected to this conversation.

“Then I’ll go alone,” It was an easy enough task to accomplish by herself, and if anyone in the Survey Corps would be able to do it, it would be the illicit doctor. “That way I’m not putting anyone else in danger.”

“And if he happens to detain you and you’re forcibly brought to your twin?” Erwin leveled, catching the way Faye sucked in a breath and stiffened.

The air felt like it drained out of the room, and the doctor had gone pale, biting back the urge to finger the hem of her blanket.

“He’s a stranger to me now,” She swallowed thickly, though it wasn’t wet, and she did a good job of putting a lid over her emotions. “I think if it came down to it, I could kill him.” Maybe. Possibly.

“Erwin!” Levi hissed. “She’s going to get herself killed-”

“Levi,” Faye interjected softly. “I’ve got enough experience with these people to know how to handle them, I’ll be okay.”

“You’re on a suicide mission, you sh*tty-”

“If I wanted to kill myself, I would have already,” Faye huffed. She felt like a child getting scolded by their mother, and the feeling stirred her stomach. “I’m doing this because the sooner I figure things out, the sooner I can tell you and Erwin everything, and that starts with Marley’s motives.”

“Fine,” He inhaled, forcing his heart to slow. “Who do you think you should take? Because you’re not f*cking going alone.”

“Aside from Alexander and Petra, I think the obvious would be you and Erwin,” Logically, it made sense, Levi knew it did, but he couldn’t help the grimace. There were so many ways this could go wrong, and it felt like he was the only one who realized that fact.

“Fine,” Levi clicked his tongue, an irate frown on his lips. “If you die, don’t come crying to me about it.” He pushed himself off of his chair. “And don’t expect me to keep your sh*tty ring as a last memento.” He didn’t look back, and the door closed behind him.

“I think that’s actually enough for today,” Erwin gave a polite smile. “In the meantime, I’d advise you to pack a medical bag for your visit and review all the material you’d like to go over during your first aid course tomorrow.”

Faye chewed her lip while she watched Erwin roll his shoulders back, hearing his bones crack while he let out a satisfied breath. He seemed at ease with her plan - or lack thereof- and it made her wonder-

“Do you really trust me, or is it all just a facade?” She wouldn’t be angry either way, but she just needed to know.

“Both,” The blond shrugged. “I’d like to think you’ve been honest with me thus far, but it makes me apprehensive about what you’re omitting,” His eyes were guarded, but they still seemed to see straight past all the flesh and bone on Faye, peering into the depths of her soul. “The more I learn about you, the more questions arise.”

Faye found herself swept under by Erwin’s blunt honesty, and the only thing she could manage to do was give him a slow nod, unwilling to look away.

“On the bench in Calaneth, Levi mentioned you had experience during your childhood shooting men,” He watched her wince, but the question had been eating him alive. “Where did you learn how to handle a rifle?”

Faye’s breath hitched, and she fiddled with the hem of her blanket, unwilling to look Erwin in the eye anymore. She couldn’t, she was an outsider just like the rest of them who’d wormed their way into the walls, and the guilt was crushing her from the inside out, threatening to spill all her secrets in a wave of uncertainty.

“Marley.” That was all Faye could get out before her throat closed in on itself, and she trained her eyes on the window, refusing to show Erwin that her eyes were burning.

“Marley,” Erwin echoed. “A formidable foe if he’s taught you all you know.”

“They.” Faye corrected.

“An organization?” His brows furrowed, “How many are there?”

She shrugged. “No clue. Lots?”

“You’ll depart after your first aid course tomorrow, is that alright? Or do you think you’ll need some extra time?” Erwin kept his emotions under check, his mind still reeling. One person was easy enough to deal with, but if it were an organization, well, that complicated matters.

“That’s fine,” Faye sighed, rubbing her temple. “I hope Orwell doesn’t drag things out, he’s got a sad*stic streak, and I’m not looking forward to dealing with his bullsh*t.”

“Yes,” Erwin’s mind flashed back to when he’d picked Faye up from John Orwell’s room, and he’d degraded Faye by asking if she had a medical kink. “He’s...Crude.” Wasn’t quite the word Erwin wanted to say, but it got the message across all the same. “Do you think we’ll need to kill him?”

Faye whipped around to look at him and bitter resentment washed over her being, settling into her chest. “I don’t think I can afford to let him live.” If it had been an outcome that would solely affect Faye, she wouldn’t have cared, but they were talking about thousands of lives being compromised because Marley couldn’t put a lid on their greed for land and resources.

“If it comes down to it, I’ll kill-”

“I’ve killed enough people, Erwin,” Faye interrupted. “What’s a few more to the thousands?”

“Faye,” Erwin swallowed thickly. Her eyes were cutting so deep into his heart he couldn’t breathe. “You’ve done enough, let me do this for you.”

“I can’t put that kind of weight on your shoulders,” She denied dully. “I’ll recover from it, but you? You’ll take months- if not years, and the Regiment needs its commander.”

*

“Connie, if it’s not about how to cauterize a wound or stop infections, I’m not interested,” Faye teased, grinning when the teenager’s ears went red.

“Well, Captain Faye- see, I was just going to ask- how do you know if someone is beyond help?” He was a smart kid, as Faye had come to know during the six hours she’d been subjected to his god-awful jokes and questions.

“Judgement call,” Faye replied. “If they’re freezing to touch, they’re struggling to breathe, losing too much blood,” She listed. “Those are all problems you aren’t well enough equipped to deal with, and sometimes you’ll need to cut your losses.” Connie frowned, and Faye added on, in a gentler tone, “It’s not your fault if someone dies while on the field. sh*t happens, and titans don’t leave much room for error. Worst comes to worst, it isn’t your fault, it’s the titans.” Her eyes slid across the room, “Any other questions?”

No one raised their hand, and Faye nodded, sending up a smile. “I’ll be around for the next half hour in the dining hall if you guys need, but I think you’ve got mostly all the knowledge you’ll need. Class dismissed.”

She watched the tan leather jackets all jumble out of their seats, heading out of the hall Faye had used in the Research and Development building. It was astounding to see how uniform everyone looked, especially when half their backs were turned to her.

“Faye! That was incredible,” Armin jogged forward bringing with him the group of lively teenagers he’d been seated near. They had all ended up front and center, and most of them had been eager to ask questions and introduce themselves. “I knew you worked as an illicit doctor, but it almost feels like you know more than any of the professional doctors in the walls.”

“Yeah,” Connie sprang up from behind Armin, grinning ear to ear. “And you made the class fun.”

“I liked that you let us eat while you talked,” Sasha added, stuffing another military ration into her mouth.

“I have a question,” Ymir spoke up, pushing her way to the front of the teenagers who’d started to crowd around Faye. “This whole monthly bleeding nonsense, how do we end it?” She leaned back on the balls of her feet, fixing Faye with a nonchalant but amused look.

“Monthly...Bleeding?” Jean looked disturbed, his lips pulled thin, “What’re you talking about?”

“The medical term is Menstruation, but most women just call it their period,” Faye supplied. She kept her eyes and ears open for any snarky remarks or jokes, but no one had said anything, eagerly waiting for Faye to continue. “Put simply, women have an organ called a uterus,” She’d backtracked over to her chalkboard, drawing a quick diagram. “It’s located over here,” She motioned to where it should have been on her own body. “Every month, these things,” She circled the ovaries, “Let down an egg, which travels these tubes,” She glided the chalk to draw an arrow, “And it attaches itself onto the lining of the uterus. If the egg isn’t fertilized via sem*n, the lining sheds, and results in bleeding from the vagin* every month which typically lasts for about a week.”

She glanced back, blinking at the small crowd she had amassed, including Alexander and Erwin, who were all listening with rapt attention. Two near the back, a tall brunette, and muscled blond seemed a little shell shocked by the explanation, both of them having gone a little green.

“The-” Connie had gone white, glancing at Sasha, “You- Your puss*-” Alexander’s hand shot out, smacking the back on Connie’s head, sending a dirty look down before he grinned at Faye. “sh*t, sorry! vagin*. Your vagin* bleeds every month?”

“Doesn’t that- Wouldn’t that hurt?” Jean asked, the color draining from his cheeks. “I mean, generally when people bleed it’s like… an emergency, right?”

“A lot of women get cramps, and they might be a little moodier before and after the process,” Faye shrugged.

“You’re telling me I have to deal with this sh*t for the rest of my life?” Ymir settled a hand on her waist, disgust scrawled along her features.

“You’ll eventually run out of eggs, and then you’ll hit menopause, but that won’t happen unless you hit your fifties.” The chances of that were slim though, as is, most of the women inside the walls only lived until their early fifties, but then to add the fact Ymir was part of the Survey Corps? The chances of her living past 30 were cut by more than half.

“So, what happens when a woman does get knocked up?” Jean questioned, though by the way his lips curled back, he really didn’t want to know. It was likely asked out of morbid curiosity.

“Horseface,” Eren groaned, stepping forward to grab hold of Jean’s arm. “Don’t ask my sister embarrassing questions like that. She’s a lady, can’t you see that?” Eren’s finger shot out to point at his sister, who was wearing trousers and a loose-fitting shirt. “She’s not here for you to ask stupid questions like that-”

“I think you’re stretching that a bit, Eren,” Faye interjected, easing her brother off of Jean. “As much as I enjoy talking about the wonders of the human body, I think I’m going to end this lesson and head over to the mess hall,” She redirected the group of teenagers to the door. “If you guys have any medical questions, feel free to find me while I’m eating.”

“Faye,” Armin weaseled himself back over to the medic. “I’ve been meaning to ask you, how come you don’t wear the uniform like everyone else?”

“It’s comfier to just wear slacks every day,” The doctor blinked as though it were obvious. “Besides, I’ve already got the emblem around my neck,” She held up the small pendant for Armin to squint at. “So it’s not like I’m hiding that I’m in the regiment or anything.”

“Where’d you get that?” He didn’t dare touch the silver, but his eyes lingered, taking in the engraved metal.

“It was a gift from Erwin, Mike, and Levi,” She shrugged. “Nothing too special.” She had started for the door with Armin bouncing behind her, his mind still mulling over the six-hour lesson.

“I never knew you were so knowledgeable,” He mumbled out, following Faye into the corridor. “I’ve never even heard of half the techniques you told us about, and based on everyone else's facial expressions, neither have they.”

She’d been hearing that sentiment for the last twenty years, and it was getting old very quickly. Faye couldn’t bring herself to comment back, settling for shrugging again, which, apparently, had become her new favorite way of saying “f*ck if I know.”

Armin moved forward, holding the door open, and just as Faye started to cross the threshold, someone gently pulled on her elbow, halting her from entering the dining hall.

“Oi,” Levi called, lips tugged down into a grimace. “I made you tea.”

Faye, meanwhile, blinked, a dumb look scrawling onto her face. “Tea?” She echoed dumbly. “But isn’t there tea inside of the mess hall..?” She trailed off inquisitively.

“It’s sh*tty tea inside there,” Levi huffed, “Come on, I cleaned a room so we can eat in peace.” He really didn’t give much choice in the matter, and he tugged on Faye’s elbow to force her to follow, leaving the medic to send an apologetic smile at Armin, who’d watched the encounter in silent confusion.

Neither spoke before Levi all but slammed open a door to what looked like a relatively neat office, and there on the desk were two bowls of soup with a bread roll each, and a pot of tea with a pair of cups waiting to be filled.

“Levi,” Flattery welled inside of the medic as she glanced back at Levi, who had already folded his jacket and started rolling his sleeves up. “You really didn’t have to-”

“Stop your sh*tty whining,” He was quick to take a seat, and the way his eyes darted to the other chair signaled he was waiting for Faye to follow. “It was more for my comfort than yours.” He watched the medic like a hawk, letting out a breath of air when she took a seat across from him.

“So,” She sounded small, fiddling with the hem of her shirt. “I was thinking, maybe you should hold onto my ring-”

“f*ck off with your ring,” Levi didn’t seem at all amused or happy, and he fixated on the way Faye shrunk into herself at his tone. “You’re not giving me that hunk of metal, not this time.” He shifted uncomfortably, this was something he’d never done before, but somehow, it seemed… necessary with Faye. “Your ring,” He softened his voice, trying to sound less grumpy. “It’s the last thing you have of your mother, and I think,” A strangled sound came from his throat, struggling to get the words out without sounding like a moron. “Maybe... That I’d like to extend the same courtesy to you.” His ears were burning, and he couldn’t bring himself to meet Faye’s wide eyes while he held out the small piece of fabric to the woman.

Faye could only stare, lips agape and heart-pounding deep in her chest, causing her ribs to quake with every thump. Her mouth had gone dry, and whatever words she tried to make out only caught on her throat.

“I can’t-”

“Don’t make this a big deal,” Levi mumbled, “Take the cravat and don’t overthink it.”

How could she not though? Faye couldn’t even remember one instance where Levi hadn’t worn his cravat, and now that she’d found out it had once belonged to his mother? It was too much.

“Faye,” The Captain lowly warned, still holding out the fabric. “If you don’t take this in the next ten seconds, I’ll strangle you with it.” When Faye’s fingers stretched out to grasp Levi’s cravat, his hand caught her wrist, and he pulled her in over the desk, his free hand grasping to the back of her head, bringing her nose to nose with him while he spoke.

“You get this dirty, and I’ll have your ass, you sh*tty doctor,” He threatened. “Don’t make me regret this.” Internally, he was screaming into a void so loudly it echoed into the depths of his soul. This was more than Faye promising to return his most prized possession, this was a sign of trust, a mutual bridge being built between the two souls, and he desperately hoped she understood how hard this was for him (Mostly because there was absolutely no f*cking way in hell that he would ever admit to it being that important, least of all to Faye’s face.)

“I promise,” Faye breathed. “I’ll bring it back, and it’ll be spotless, I swear.” She couldn’t even form a coherent thought, his eyes were too jarring, and they were reaching into the deepest pits not even Faye had tried to come to terms with. Everything was jumbling together, and all she could see was her eyes reflected in his. “You- This is really thoughtful-”

“Just take the damn thing already,” He let go of her wrist and he brought himself to sit down again, massaging his temple. She was a little too close for comfort, and his heart had swelled twice its normal size from how utterly thankful she looked. “That’s an order not to die.”

“I hadn’t planned on it,” She gave a wry smile, really, it was all she could manage. Her heart was ripping itself into shreds at Levi’s gesture. “Am I allowed to ask-”

“Her dress,” This was stepping into uncharted territory for The Captain, and the more she asked about his mother, the more attached he’d no doubt feel for the medic, which was never a good idea in either of their line of work. “Now stop with your sh*tty questions and start shoveling that sh*tty soup into your mouth.”

It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence-no- It was perfect, neither of them had any need to say much more about the situation, and if Levi trusted her to bring his cravat back, Faye wouldn’t disappoint.

A knock sounded on the door before it was pushed, and in came Erwin, a brow raised while his eyes flickered between the two captains.

“I see I wasn’t extended an invitation,” He spoke slowly, the rumble of his words vibrating teasingly in his chest. “I was just on my way to inform you that Alexander and Petra are awaiting your orders to leave.”

“You’re coming with us, right?” Faye glanced back to Levi before training her eyes on her commander.

“Levi and I will be in the pub just downstairs,” Erwin nodded. “If anything goes wrong, just give a scream and we’ll come rushing up.”

“Just in case something does go wrong,” Faye glanced back at Levi, “There’s a cat in the garden we named Beef, and I’d appreciate it if you kept watering the bizarre patch of grass in the corner of my garden for him.”

There was a beat of silence before Levi’s eyes narrowed.

“You’ve been feeding a mangy cat? It probably sh*t all over your garden,” He growled, his skin crawling at the information, he’d eaten carrots Faye had grown in that stupid f*cking garden.

“He’s very well behaved,” Faye grinned, “Comes into the castle every once in a while and-”

“What?”

“Beef is an attention whor*, so you need to make sure you pet him lots,” She ignored the incredulous glare that was burning a hole through her forehead. “He likes belly rubs, and when you scratch behind his ears. Also, you have to whistle for him-”

“We’re getting rid of it when you get back,” Levi scoffed. “That sh*tty cat probably has fleas and week-old sh*t stuck to its ass.”

“We’ll wash Beef when I get back, then.”

“Faye?!” Someone called from the corridor, faintly, the sound of a door crashing open echoed off the stone walls, before they called again.

“Wonder what Eren wants,” Faye mused, “He sounds kind of frantic.”

“The brat is probably constipated,” Levi smirked.

Erwin rolled his eyes and opened the door just as Eren had started to reach for the doorknob. The poor kid looked flustered, like he’d ran a marathon, and his eyes were wide and panicked.

“Hange,” He wheezed, leaning on his knees. “Squad Leader-” Faye quirked an eyebrow at just how out of breath Eren was. “Squad Leader Hange made-made Krista cry.” He took in a greedy inhalation of oxygen, inflating his lungs until they burned. “They’re talking-talking about pregnancy.”

“Just go f*cking deal with those brats,” Levi halfheartedly snapped. “sh*tty-Glasses has probably scarred them for life.” He let his lips curve up just slightly when Faye grinned, and he watched her scamper out after her brother while he shook his head.

"We'll leave in fifteen minutes!" She called over her shoulder.

“sh*tty f*cking doctor...” He muttered out.

Erwin turned to watch Levi, his heart twinging to life with an emotion he couldn’t quite place. Silently, he nodded, affection racing through his veins for the short medic.

Meanwhile, Faye blinked at the table of teenagers who were all blankly staring down at their food in silence. Apparently, Hange had really done a number, even Sasha had halted, taking smaller bites than usual.

“So,” Faye tried to keep her tone casual. “Let’s start off with what Hange told you guys so I can fix this,” She took a bite of stew, waiting for someone to answer, and when no one spoke up, Faye frowned. “Alright, let’s start at the beginning, and since class isn’t in session, feel free to be as vulgar as need be.”

*

There were three questions Faye had been advised to ask Orwell.

1. Names of the candidates
2. What they were planning on doing with the village to the south
3. What their main goal was

That was all Erwin said he would ask Faye about, and if she happened to have a personal conversation with John, well, that was up to her discretion whether or not to divulge.

Honestly, the plan seemed simple enough, Alexander and Petra would visit with their uncle in his room for a bit, maybe tip a few drinks back, and when they decided to go home, Faye would corner John and ask him about it all.

But the f*cker screwed with Faye’s plan.

Somehow, they’d all ended up downstairs in the pub, exactly where Levi and Erwin had a clear view of all three. Thankfully, they’d been discreet about moving to a more crowded part of the dining area, where they blended seamlessly into the crowd of faces.

Neither of them looked happy about the development, and to make matters worse, John kept touching Faye. It wasn’t anything inappropriate - at least not in anyone else's eyes- but his hand kept brushing against her arm, or he’d grab onto her wrist whenever Al’ made a joke to steady himself while laughing.

“Faye,” Orwell’s beady gaze fixed onto the illicit doctor, picking apart her microexpressions. “You haven’t said much tonight, how are you enjoying your time in the Survey Corps?” He refrained from making any unnecessary comments, especially after Faye threatened his fingers.

“It’s fine,” She shrugged. “Erwin keeps me busy, lots of paperwork.”

“Yeah,” Alexander snorted, “You forgot to mention you got shot a few days ago.” He was oblivious to Faye’s discomfort. “You should have seen her, Uncle John. Faye came home in the bloodiest clothes I’ve ever seen, and when I asked her about it, all she did was lift her shirt to show me she had already stitched the wound. It was incredible.”

It bothered Faye that Alexander had disregarded the lives she’d taken so callously, like they were trophies Faye had earned.

“Oh?” John mused, eyes roved up and down Faye. “When was this? Can I see the wound? I bet it looks so pretty-”

“Uncle,” Petra reprimanded. “That’s creepy, cut it out.”

“Happened three days ago,” Faye’s eyes narrowed when he clenched his jaw, “There were two thugs who cornered me in an alleyway,” She skirted her shirt up just slightly, and she winced when Orwell’s fingers came up to graze the sutured skin. “It’s a wonder I made it out of that alive.”

“I’d expect nothing less from the infamous Faye Jaeger,” His lips curled, his knuckle pushing into the skin just slightly, not enough to tear the skin, but just enough to watch Faye bite back a groan before hastily slapping his hand away and tucking in the shirt again. “I’ve heard rumors you’re notorious for your fighting skills.”

“What, are you spying on me?” She sarcastically quipped, taking a sip of the water she’d ordered.

Orwell shrugged, a smug smirk forming on his lips as he mirrored Faye, not willing to divulge anything more on the subject. Bastard.

“Uncle John,” Alexander mumbled, fidgeting in his seat like a child. “In your letter to Faye, you mentioned that you,” He was stuttering over all of his words, and Faye watched his adam's apple bob as he swallowed thickly. “It’s just that you mentioned you didn’t think you would live for very much longer, and I… See, I was just wondering why you would say something like that.”

John co*cked his head, and his hand moved to grasp something inside his jacket, discreetly flashing it for the table to see. There was no fear or hesitation on his face, just a calm disposition that made Faye’s heart drop.

He was holding a pistol.

“I was wondering when you were going to ask me about that,” He grinned, canines on display. He angled the gun at Faye, and his hand met with her arm, holding it up, though he made no sudden movements. “I don’t plan on living past tonight.” Alexander swallowed, and Petra had frozen in place, eyes wide like a deer in front of a carriage. “I need you and your sister to sit with Commander Erwin and Captain Levi, and you tell them that if they interrupt Faye and I’s conversation, I’ll shoot her without a second thought.”

“Uncle John,” Petra looked like she was going to be sick. The color had all drained from her face, and by the way her chest was heaving, Faye gathered she was having trouble getting in a full breath of air, which likely meant she was getting dizzy. “Put the gun away, let’s talk about this.”

“Petra, dear,” Orwell condescending smiled, “Go sit with your f*cking captain before I blow a hole through Faye.”

“Why would you...” Alexander looked worse than Petra did, his hands had started to shake. “Why would you want-want to kill Faye?”

“Kids, this is goodbye,” He held no semblance of an apologetic emotion, “I would like to thank you for accepting me into your family five years ago, but I think it’s time I take my leave, and in order to do that, I need to speak with Faye alone.”

“I’ll be okay,” Faye’s eyes darted between the two ginger-haired siblings, a small, comforting smile on her face. “Go sit with Erwin and Levi, and maybe order some tea. You two look like you’re ready to vomit.”

“Faye, I can’t-” Alexander gripped onto the table, frantically looking at Orwell for some sort of explanation, waiting for him to crack a grin and say he was joking, but no such reaction came from the judge. “I can’t lose you too.”

“Go.” The doctor urged. “Worse comes to worst, I’ll patch myself up, but I’m in more danger the longer you two press John’s patience.” She was lying through her teeth. If Orwell pulled the trigger, there would be no saving Faye, not when the gun was pressed against her rib like that.

Carefully, the two Ral siblings left the table, trailing into the corner of the pub, leaving Faye and John to stare at each other.

“Move to the other side of the table, slowly,” John inched the gun away, and he made a hand motion as if to hurry Faye. His eyes never left hers when she sluggishly moved, the weight of the world slowing her movements down. “And keep your hands on the table where I can see them.”

“Never took you for the suicidal type,” Faye admitted, clasping her hands in plain sight. “Any particular reason you wanted to speak to me, or are you planning on getting off to my dead body after you shoot?”

“Your last day in the military,” He ignored Faye’s question, keeping the gun pointed at Faye from across the table, but hunching over to hide it from prying eyes. Levi would no doubt be pissed Faye had gotten herself into this situation. “How much of it do you remember?”

“Are we talking about today-”

“Stop playing the village idiot,” John hissed, the lines on his face deepened, and the longer Faye stared, the more she could have sworn she saw the years of war flashing in his eyes. “In Marley.”

“It’s pretty blurry if I’m being honest,” She swallowed the lump in her throat, forcing oxygen into her lungs to calm her racing heart. The best course of action she could take right now was just to play it safe. “I remember gunning men three times my age down, the sound of grenades whistling through the air before they detonated. A man, Alexander Duorko-” She frowned when John gave a small, reminiscent smile at the name. “He saved my life, but I can’t say I remember his face.”

“You remember your first cigarette?” Orwell gave an unsettling grin, one that made the world tilt on its axis while the air rushed out of the room in a cold sweep. The hair on Faye’s arms stood, and her legs went numb. “You were a cute kid, I’ll admit.”

“You...” Faye squinted, trying to pull the memory from the recesses of her mind, but all it did was make the floor sway beneath her feet. She couldn’t even remember what the soldier who’d offered Faye her first taste of nicotine looked like, the memory had corroded over time, and he was little more than a blurry figure that haunted Faye’s thoughts from time to time.

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten what I looked like,” John mocked, “And I thought we’d bonded that day.”

Faye turned her head to look at Erwin and Levi, trying to convey that this conversation was most definitely something she did not want to discuss, and from their grim expressions, they reciprocated the feeling wholeheartedly.

“This might take me some time to process,” Faye managed, her stomach filling with dread. The news made her want to throw up in the nearest toilet. “This is a little far-fetched, even for you.”

It only took him a second, his free hand dipping into his breast pocket before he pulled out a small, worn photograph-something Faye hadn’t seen in years..

Her eyes narrowed, there she was, having been photographed crouching low on the floor, her rifle against her shoulder, finger hovering on the trigger. The little girl in the photograph looked starved, cheeks hollowed in, and eyes dead inside.

“I wasn’t aware they took photos of us while we were on duty,” Faye murmured, disgust welling in her guts. “This was a time I would have rather forgotten.”

“I hope my men told you how renowned you are back in Marley,” He made no effort to take back the picture, instead allowing Faye to continue flitting her eyes over the blurry photo. Her head was starting to throb with all the new information, and Faye couldn’t tell if she was glad to have another memento from Marley, or if she wished it would have burned the day she left.

“Unfortunately,” She muttered lowly. “I don’t even know why they’re so hung up on a seven-year-old who was supposedly turned into a titan.”

“Marley sent reinforcements when none of their soldiers returned,” He grinned. “They found every last one of their men dead in the water or on the wall.”

Oh for f*cks sake.

“It wasn’t me,” She tried. “I didn’t kill everyone.”

“You were the only one capable of that destruction,” His tone had gone soft, the first time Faye had ever remembered him speaking so gently to her. “And now they want you back.”

“Literally the absolute worst news you could possibly give me, you asshole,” Faye leaned her elbow on the table, rubbing her temple. “This is a sh*t show, what else should I know?” She hadn’t thought it was possible for her stomach to drop any more, but she stood corrected when Orwell opened his mouth again.

“I can’t confirm or deny,” Even Orwell looked a little green at whatever he was going to say. “But Zeke apparently has a kink for women who look similar to you.”

“And the candidates and the village to the south?” The throbbing had turned into a harsh pounding, and she flinched when she heard the blood rushing through her ears. At this point, she wasn’t even sure she wanted to know the answer to either of those.

“Unfortunately confidential, as well as our main objective,” He leaned back in his seat, taking in the cleanest breath of air he’d had in the last eighteen years. “I am still loyal to Marley.”

“Why the charades?” The words spilled out before Faye could stop them, and the exhaustion filtered onto her face when she met his eyes. “Why wouldn’t you just tell me who you were when we first met?”

“The thrill of it all,” Orwell shrugged. “I got to see you from a perspective no one else in Marley could ever dream of, and I reveled in it.” She frowned when the look in her eyes shifted, and for a second, he found himself staring at the little girl he’d met in the trenches all those years ago. The same one who’d handed him Alexander Duorko’s envelope, and shared a cigarette with. “You’ve definitely grown into a desirable woman.”

“Tell that to my ringless finger,” Faye quipped, though her shoulders remained tense, and her eyes trailed down to the gun that was still aimed at her chest. “If you’re going to shoot me, aim for my heart or my lungs. The hair tie I’m using is sentimental, and Levi is going to kick my ass if I get any blood on it.”

“Are you and Humanity’s Strongest close?” He seemed interested in the answer, and when Faye gave a lazy shrug, he frowned. “Has he seen you when you’ve got blood running down your chin? Because I think it’s a marvelous sight.”

“Back to this, are we?” John’s love for seeing Faye beat was wearing her patience thin. “Haven’t I already broken your finger for this before?”

“I saw what you did to my men, lovely job, by the way. I’m sure the sight of you with a bullet in your intestines was enough to get a rise out of them,” He took a languid sip of his alcohol, relishing in the taste of it. “Personally, your ability to sew yourself up is a turn-on for me, though.”

“How many candidates are there?” Faye tried again, lips pulled thin and eager to shift the conversation.

“Three,” He shrugged. “There was supposed to be four, but one of them got eaten by a rogue titan, so who knows where the fourth shifter is.” He shrugged. “Then there was me, and my two boys - whom you’ve single-handedly killed, the ears were a nice touch.”

“I need names, John,” Faye scowled.

“Ah ah ah,” He tutted, bringing his ale to his lips. “I’ve already told you, that’s a secret I can’t divulge. It would ruin our plans.”

“Fine, what about the southern villages?” She couldn’t stomach the water, not while such an important conversation was happening.

“Also confidential, I’m afraid.” He repeated, licking his lips and leaned in, grabbing onto Faye’s hand. “Zeke sends his regards, by the way,” He smiled with satisfaction at the way Faye’s back went rigid. “Quite a smart boy, very accomplished and well respected, it’s a wonder the two of you came from swine like Grisha and Dina-”

“Hey,” Faye’s voice dropped. “Keep my parents out of this, I mean it.”

“When I first met you inside the walls,” He slid his tongue along the bottom of his lip, “I thought I was just being paranoid, that the name and face I’d had burned into my memory was finally sending me into a spiral.” He grinned at the guarded way Faye clenched her hand. “Imagine my surprise when the family I married into was good friends with the little girl I watched take down a dozen soldiers in the blink of an eye,” His hand tightened on hers, “But it only intensified when I heard about your illicit practices, and I knew it was only a matter of time before you would be sat in my courtroom.”

“You were the one who set me up when Trost fell,” Her head was starting to throb with all of the new information.

“And when my sweet little nephew sent word that you were in trouble, I jumped at the chance to oversee your court hearing,” His smile had turned malicious, and Faye’s heart dropped. “I wanted to see you in action again. All those years of watching you waste your life in a f*cking tea shop made me lose my mind, so when I heard Nile Dok was rallying for your execution, I leaped at the opportunity to send you right back into the military.”

“What is this?” Faye’s skin was crawling. “You had some sick dream to see the little girl who’d finally gotten away from all the bloodshed be dragged back in?” She pulled her hand away, “You’re vile, and a disgusting excuse for a human, you piece of sh*t.”

“No,” He grinned. “I wanted to see you become the warrior I knew you were - the god I knew you were.” Orwell had snatched Faye’s other hand, latching onto the bare skin with his own. “Do you know how many nights I spent telling Alexander about you? About how great you were?”

“Stop,” Faye’s stomach was twisting, and nausea was quickly setting in.

“The boy worships you now, you should be thanking me.”

“I never asked for any of this,” Faye snapped, tearing her hand away again. “I left Marley to start a new life inside the walls, where I wouldn’t have to kill people anymore, and you sabotaged that.”

“Say what you want, but your handiwork on my men speaks for itself. You never let your instincts wither away, and I think that speaks volumes about your priorities.”

“I want names of the candidates,” Faye ordered.

Orwell hummed, “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“Names,” Faye repeated.

“Zeke is going to have so much fun with you,” He let out a wheezy laugh. “When I told him last month you were still alive- well- the letter he sent back made it clear his first priority was re-obtaining you.”

“You only told him last month?” Faye’s eyebrows knitted together, “You could have told him when you first got in, couldn’t you?”

He leaned in over the table, nails digging into her hand yet again, lips curving up into a predatory smile, “He’s in the walls now.”

“Stop with the games,” Faye leaned back in her chair, needing some space away from John. “I need real answers, and we’re going around in circles. What are the candidates' names?”

“Who says they’re games?” He quirked an eyebrow. “I mean every word. And when the plan starts,” He moaned, “You’ll be front and center to it all. They’ll come after Eren and then Zeke is going to swoop in when you’re at your most vulnerable,” His hand had shifted down to pull out a gun, and Faye stiffened. “I’ll see you in Hell, Faye Jaeger. Just remember my face this time.”

Faye’s legs tried to move, to scramble up from her seat to stop him, but it was too late. The barrel of the gun pressed against the middle of his forehead and her screams were drowned out by his shot before he slumped onto the table.

Distantly, she heard the other screams, but they all paled in comparison to the gunshot that echoed inside of Faye’s head. She knew she had shrieked, trying to deter the man, but the scream died in her throat when he slumped.

It was all so… Numbing. She could tell the bar was in a state of panic, but she couldn’t bring herself to move or care, and all she could bring herself to do was stare down at the body.

He’d been her saving grace during her last day in the Warrior Program. He’d offered her a cigarette. He’d been the one to tell her ‘Love is love,’ A sentence she had clung to over the years. John Orwell had known who she was since the moment he met her in the walls, and he’d never said a word about it, feigning ignorance.

Why hadn’t he said something to her?

Faye had been a fool to believe she could escape her past, and John Orwell only proved the point.

“Faye.” Levi was shaking her shoulder while Alexander kneeled to her side, clutching tightly to her arm while he sobbed, mirroring Petra, who’d done the same on her other arm.

“I’m okay,” It sounded distant and far away, like she was underwater. “I think...”

“Faye,” Levi tried again, slapping her cheek gently.

“I said I’m okay,” She mumbled again. “So stop slapping me around like a piece of meat.” She didn’t meet Levi’s eyes, she couldn’t pry them off of John, where a pool of blood was forming around his head. “You should get these two out of here.”

“Faye,” Alexander sniffled. “I can’t leave you, I can’t.”

“You-” Petra shuddered in a breath, “You- and then he- and now-”

“Petra, take Al’ home,” Faye pleaded. “You guys shouldn’t have to sit here and see this.”

“You don’t know how scared I was for you,” Alexander was sobbing, clinging to Faye’s arm as though she’d disappear at a moment’s notice. “I can’t-can’t leave you. You’re my best friend, Faye...”

“Levi,” It came out strangled, the words getting lodged in her throat. “They shouldn’t have to see this,” Finally, she pulled her eyes up, forcing them to peer up at the fellow captain. “You need to get them home, please.”

Levi, on the other hand, was staring at Faye’s hand, a contemplative frown curling his lips.

“Is that...” His brow twitched as he moved his hand to pluck the thick paper out of Faye’s grip, “Is this you?” If he squinted and darted his eyes between the picture and Faye, he could definitely see the resemblance. But then, if it were a hand-drawn picture of Faye, how had they gotten to it be as life-like as it was grainy?

“Yeah,” She bobbed her head up and down. Slowly, she stood, taking with her the Ral siblings, “Come on guys, you shouldn’t have to look at your uncle. Not when he’s like that.” She didn’t look back, and she swallowed down the guilt that was making its way up her throat.

Petra didn’t say much, just held tightly to Faye, but Alexander? He was a mess, muttering Faye’s name, and John’s, and the tears seemed neverending, even when Faye pulled them out of the pub to lean against the wall.

“You guys want a cigarette?”

Chapter 16: 12. Starry Starry Night

Chapter Text

Anything was better than being subjected to staring at John Orwell’s corpse, where he’d laid in a pool of his own blood thanks to the bullet he put in his head. The man had been less than pleasant, but no one had been prepared to watch his suicide.

So Faye had ushered the Ral siblings away from the scene, trying to shield the body from their eyes the best she could. That had been an hour ago. The streets had long since emptied, leaving the trio to settle with their thoughts despite the biting cold winds that brushed through now and again. Lanterns in the pub window glowed dimly, settling a soft, orange glow overtop three soldiers, who’d taken up residence on the floor, leaning against the pub.

“How do you deal with it?” Petra spoke quietly, huddled next to Faye against the pub.

“What?” Faye raised an eyebrow, “The constant death?”

Petra nodded, her eyes settled on Alexander, who’d slumped against Faye’s arm, soft breaths of air pushing past his lips in an even tempo while his eyes remained shut. The boy had tuckered himself out with all of his tears, and he no doubt needed the rest.

“I keep moving forward,” There was a cool breeze that swept through the air, chilling Faye’s bones. “I read in a book that we have two deaths,” She said slowly, recalling the words from the deep recesses of her mind. “The first is when your heart stops beating, and we decompose, but the second is when your name is said or thought for the last time, doomed to be forgotten by the world.” Her eyes wandered up, settling on the stars glittering in the moonlight. “Everyone I’ve ever killed or seen die, I try to recall them at night, just to keep them alive a little longer.”

“You treat Alexander really well,” Petra quietly admitted. “I think you’ve been more of a sister to him than I have.”

“I disagree,” Faye hummed, the sound vibrating and warming her chest. “I’ve been his friend for a decade now, but he’s never seen me as a replacement for you.” She’d always been careful not to overstep that boundary. Sure, she’d been seen as family, but never as Al’s sister.

“I never really saw your appeal,” Petra bluntly stated. “But then Alexander compared you to a god, and-”

“Please don’t ever equate me to a god,” She cringed. “I’ve had enough of that to last a lifetime.”

“He was kind of right, though,” The ginger mumbled. “Earlier, you were so calm when Uncle John pulled out the gun, and then when we left and went to sit down with Captain Levi and Commander Smith, you weren’t even breaking a sweat.” She licked her lips, trying to put her feelings into words. “It was… I don’t think anyone I know would be able to keep such a level head if they were in your position.”

“Orwell was a loose cannon,” Faye shrugged, disregarding the shy compliment Petra had just bestowed to her. “If I started panicking, Al’ probably would have had a mental breakdown.” It was true; the twenty-year-old hinged on Faye’s show of emotion, and he no doubt wouldn’t have handled the situation so well if she’d been outwardly alarmed.

“Even after he-” Petra’s breath hitched, her mind intrusively flashing with the image of John slumped on the table in a pool of his own blood. “-He shot...” A lump had formed in her throat. “He shot himself,” She swallowed thickly. “You just sat there like it was any other day. You didn’t even look surprised.”

“Petra,” Faye sighed, “I’m just as susceptible to human emotion as anyone else,” She’d been more than a little shocked, maybe even too surprised to outwardly show it. “I’ve just trained myself to cry and be vulnerable in private. That’s all.”

The ginger’s lips thinned, and for what felt like the first time, she took the time to really look at Faye. Sure, superficially, Faye was attractive. Brown hair, light eyes, slender, short. But inwardly? It felt like she was a yawning chasm, filled with empathy and understanding for others. Her eyes roved Faye’s form, and they narrowed at the fabric Faye had tied around her low bun.

Levi’s cravat.

“I think if Captain Levi had to love someone,” Petra’s cheeks burned, averting her eyes. “I’d be glad it was you.”

Faye sucked in a breath of air so fast, it got lodged in her throat, and she coughed, trying to get her bearings.

“I don’t think he loves me,” It came out in a rush, “I think… I think we’re friends,” That had been what they’d agreed on the night she gave him a massage, and it had been brought up a few times after that, so she hoped it was appropriate to call Levi her friend.

“I don’t know,” Petra let herself give a small smile, “I’ve been on his team for the last four years, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him look at someone else the way he does you.” Her train of thought ran freely to her mouth as she continued. “Come to think of it, what’s going on between you and Commander Smith? It feels like every time he comes to visit, he brings flowers for you.”

“It’s part of an inside joke,” Faye dismissed. “Nothing romantic on that front.” She let a beat of silence pass before she added on, “Erwin is too… I think he’d be more blunt with his actions if he were courting me.” Then there was also the fact he’d outright denied Faye’s suspicions, but that felt like too private a moment to retell.

“What about Mike?”

“He’s into Nanaba,” Faye let out. “They’re trying to keep it all under wraps, though, so you didn’t hear that from me.”

“Isn’t that against the rules?” Petra whispered, eyes wide.

“Who’s going to tell The Commander?” Faye found herself echoing Erwin’s words, nostalgic for two and a half weeks prior. “As far as we’re concerned, we know nothing, and they’d make a cute couple.”

“They really would make a cute couple,” Alexander hoarsely mumbled from Faye’s shoulder, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“How’re you feeling?” Faye inquired.

“Well,” He sighed, “You were definitely right about that whole sleep ointment nonsense.”

“Alright,” The medic’s lips twitched in amusem*nt, “If you’re going to quote me, at least remember the quote. I said, ‘ Sleep is like balm for the mind. ’”

“Close enough,” He passively waved, “Besides, I feel like I can actually think straight now.”

Faye watched his expression with rapt attention, picking it apart from within the second. He wasn’t breaking down, and he seemed pretty cognizant of the situation, which Faye supposed was a good sign. His lips had tugged down into a frown, making him look a decade older, but most worrisome of all were the lines carved under his eyes.

“I’m going to grab us some food,” Faye decided, though she faltered when Alexander reached for her arm again, desperately clutching tightly to the doctor. “I’ll be right back,” She promised, softening her gaze to the young adult. “I’m also going to speak with Erwin and Levi to see how much longer they’ll be.”

Alexander abated, sinking into himself as he watched Faye get to her feet before she passed by him, a small, comforting smile adorning her face when she met his eyes.

The pub seemed like it had been cleaned a little better, no doubt thanks to Levi. The body had since been moved, and the blood had been cleaned. The patrons still looked skittish, all sitting as far away as possible, trying to avoid looking at the spot John Orwell had killed himself on. The place John had slumped over in a pool of his own blood with a bullet in his head.

“Oi,” Levi’s hand found Faye’s elbow, startling her. “Erwin and I have some questions.”

Faye gave a curt nod, “Let’s get the interrogation over with then.”

Levi’s jaw clenched as he spun on his heel, leading Faye into the inn and up a set of stairs into what she assumed was Orwell’s room. It was quaint, just a small bed with a trunk that looked like it’d been ransacked. Erwin had taken a seat on the bed, rifling through a few papers John had set on his nightstand.

“You looked quite different as a child,” Erwin slowly started, prying his eyes from the documents he’d been inspecting. “Less… Alive.” He held up a photograph, different from the one John had slid over the table to Faye. The worry lines under Faye’s eyes looked much worse in her youth than they did now, and the haunted glint in her eyes was concealed much better in her adulthood, though from time to time, it peeked through her careful exterior. “It’s amazing how lifelike these are.”

Faye hummed, furrowing her brows as she took the photo, inspecting it.

She was sat at camp under a tree, staring off in a daze. It must have been when she first started because if Faye squinted, she could make out the tears dripping down her hollow cheeks.

“How many of these are there?” She felt her stomach lurch, mouth salivating the longer she stared. It hadn’t been a pleasant time, and Faye had spent the better part of her life within the walls trying to get over her days in the Warrior Program.

“Three,” Erwin shrugged, handing them all off to her.

The first one had been the photo John had slid over the table to her, and the last one pictured Faye in the medical tent, stitching a soldier up. Concentration splayed over her features as the curved needle had only just started to pierce the skin.

“Do you mind if I burn these?” Faye questioned, face paling. “They’re making me nauseous.”

“Oi,” Levi snatched the photographs out of Faye’s hands, scowling. “I mind.” When he’d plucked the first one out of Faye’s hand, he’d been in awe of how lifelike it was and how sleek the rifle she used looked, but then when he’d come upstairs, and Erwin had shown him the other two, his heart had plummeted. These were fragments from time, picturing Faye in her childhood, and regardless of how upset they made her, they seemed like the type of sentimental sh*t she ought to keep.

“Did you glean anything useful from the conversation with Orwell?” Erwin asked tiredly.

“There’s three candidates.” That had been the only concrete answer she’d gotten out of him. “There might be a fourth, but it’s difficult to say.”

“What else?” Levi impatiently questioned.

“I’m 90% sure their target is Eren,” Faye let out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding. “And after they get him, I’m next.” Of course, her throat was burning, begging her to tell them that Zeke was inside the walls, but if she blurted that out, it would only complicate the situation more. “It’s a strong possibility one of the candidates were the ones who purposefully killed Hange’s pet titans.” She tacked on as if that wasn’t a conclusion Erwin had already come up with.

“And your twin?”

“A dangerous threat,” She settled for. “From what I understand, he’s a nutcase.” Yeah, that was a decent explanation. Faye couldn’t bring herself to tell Erwin what John had told her. The words, ‘ Apparently he has a kink for women who look like me,’ just seemed wildly inappropriate.

“A nutcase?” Erwin echoed.

“Insane,” Faye elaborated. “It sounds like he’s got some mental issues he needs to work through. If anything, we should feel more threatened because of that.”

“He’s willing to sacrifice more to obtain his goal,” The Commander pieced together. “A formidable foe.”

“You look like you sh*t your pants,” Levi frowned, “What aren’t you telling us?”

“You’re not going to like it,” Faye weakly murmured. “It’s going to make you a lot more apprehensive about him.”

“Spit it out,” The Captain growled, impatiently waiting for the medic to start talking.

“Orwell said that he heard rumors,” She said it all slowly; the words were still processing in her brain. “Apparently, Zeke has an inclination towards women who look like me.” She swallowed the bile down. “I’m not assuming anything, but I think it’s safe to say I should be wary around him regardless of if this rumor has any truth to it or not.”

“A wise decision,” Erwin muttered, a hard look on his features. “If it can be helped, I’d like for you to stay away from him.”

“You’re only postponing the inevitable,” Faye gave a meek smile, cringing at her own words. “Won’t be my first time getting raped, so at least I’ll know what to expect.”

Erwin’s jaw slackened while the photos Levi held fluttered to the floor, both having frozen to stare at the medic.

The two men caught eye contact with each other. It was brief and frantic, their message to each other clear.

“Before either of you act like I pissed in your morning oatmeal," Faye cut in, clenching her jaw. "I'd like to remind you that my reunion with Zeke isn't something we can actively avoid," That was a hard truth to swallow. "He's in the walls, and none of us have any clue what he looks like or what his main objective is. The sooner he obtains me, the sooner we get some answers." She'd already thought about it all while she was sitting outside the pub, and the fastest way to gain intel would be by meeting Zeke head-on.

“You’re certain you can handle it?” His innards were screaming, begging him to turn her down and play the hero, but somewhere deep down, Erwin knew that wasn’t a viable option.

She took a moment to study Erwin’s profile. The furrowed tilt his eyebrows took on, the creases under his eyes, the thin line his lips took with his dismay at the reality of the situation. The man was waiting to die of stress.

“I’ll make it out alive,” She promised, “I always do.” Faye leaned on the doorframe, the light from the candles cupping half her face in the darkness. “I’d be more worried about what we plan to do with Zeke after the fact.”

*

It had been three days since John Orwell shot himself. Three days filled with sleepless nights, where Alexander would shuffle into Faye's room and pass out on her bed. Three days of working tirelessly on finishing mass-producing salves and ointments before packing them into saddle sacks. Three days that Faye had worked herself to exhaustion, favoring being tired over dreaming of Orwell's unblinking eyes.

She hadn’t spoken an awful lot. She didn’t have much to say.

Three days after John Orwell’s death, Levi gave his team the day off, just as Faye had done for Alexander, and they sent everyone except for Eren off to attend the funeral. The Special Operations Squad was tight-knit, and Petra’s uncle’s death hit them all like a ton of bricks, which was why none of them had any qualms over attending and staying by Petra’s side.

Levi had been dutiful during those three days at bringing a small tray of food to the infirmary, choosing to eat with the doctor in the privacy of her office and keep her company. It seemed to him that she’d been reticent - not that he blamed her, of course- but it bothered him like an itch he couldn’t quite reach. He wouldn’t pry though, it wasn’t his place, and being forced to talk about feelings, well, it wasn’t exactly his forté.

Eren wiped the sweat from his forehead as he stared down at the brown cat, whose green eyes blinked innocently up at him. The stupid cat was smarter than it looked, and it had been pissing the boy off for the last half hour.

“Come on, Beef,” Eren quietly urged. “Faye’s been acting weird lately, and maybe she’ll cheer up if I sneak you into the castle.” It let out a soft yawn as though mocking the titan shifter. He bit his tongue to keep from lashing out. His outburst would only spook the cat, and the last thing he needed was for Beef to bolt. “That’s a good kitty,” He took a slow step forwards, keeping his hands in the air.

A hand swept down before Eren could take another step, lifting the feline by the nape of its neck.

“So this is the cat that’s been sh*tting in the garden,” Levi drawled, scrutinizing the cat who stared up at him with wide eyes. “Disgusting.”

“Captain Levi!” Eren exclaimed, his back stiffening when his captain slid his harsh gaze to the boy. “I-I wasn’t going to-”

“At ease,” Levi ordered, clicking his tongue when the cat started purring. “Take the beast, and get the hell out of here before I change my mind.” It was obvious Levi held disdain for the cat, eager to pass it off to Eren. “It’s a sad day when a cat bests a man; next time, try whistling for the damn thing. It was pathetic, watching you run after this mangy beast.” He let go of the cat when Eren held onto it beneath its front legs

“Sir!” Eren nodded, waiting until Levi continued on his way back into the castle before he slumped. “You stupid cat,” He glowered. “Nearly got me in trouble with The Captain.” His legs worked quickly as he jogged back into the castle, jostling Beef around by accident.

“Faye?” He knocked on the infirmary door, though when no one answered, he peeked his head through the door, scanning the room for the familiar brunette. “Must be in her room,” he mumbled, mostly to the cat.

Again, Eren Jaeger stalked forward, knocking on the wooden door of his sister’s room.

“Levi, I can’t drink any more tea-” She stopped herself mid-sentence when Faye’s eyes landed on Eren, who wore a goofy grin. “Hey, what’s up?” Sure, Eren popped by her office every few days to have some breakfast tea with his big sister, but it wasn’t often he showed up midday unless he was injured because of one of Hange’s experiments.

“I, uh,” He stammered, holding the cat out for Faye. “I brought you Beef,” He waited until his sister hesitantly held her hands out, a quizzical look adorning her face. “You’ve been pretty down lately, and the only time I’ve seen you smile was in the garden with him.”

“Eren,” Faye breathed, flattery swelling in her chest. “Thank you. Did you want to come chat for a while? I was just cleaning up.”

Eren frowned at her words. Faye Jaeger had always tidied up, preferring to keep everything relatively clean, but when his eyes glided past Faye into her bedroom, his brows knitted together. It looked like she’d been scrubbing everything down since dawn, and her room reeked of disinfectant. She had never been so extensive in her cleaning endeavors, and from what he saw of her room right now, well, to put it lightly, it would put Captain Levi’s cleaning to shame.

“Sure,” He absentmindedly agreed, following Faye into her room before she closed the door.

“So, how has training been going lately?” The medic asked, setting Beef down on her lap as she sat on one end of her bed while Eren kicked off his shoes.

“It’s okay,” He shrugged, taking the opposite end of the bed. The backboard supported his back while he leaned against it, staring at his big sister. “I’m still not as good as the rest of Captain Levi’s squad, though.” It came out timidly like he was embarrassed he wasn’t as skilled as the rest of his team.

“You’ll get there,” Faye assured, scratching behind Beef’s ear gently. “You’re only fifteen, and you haven’t even been part of the regiment for a whole month yet, so don’t beat yourself up over it yet.”

It was a moment of weakness, one of the many that were sure to come, and Eren’s frustration bubbled over as he raked a hand through his hair, clearly annoyed.

“You’re one to talk,” He grumbled. “You’re perfect at everything you do. I didn’t even know you knew how to shoot a rifle until three weeks ago. Then I find out you’re this complete badass, who got shot and still managed to kick two grown men's asses before she sewed herself up.” It seemed unfair to him that all of his friends were better than he was.

“I’m good at those things out of necessity,” Faye sighed. “You’ll hone your skills when you get out onto the field and have to take a few titans down.” She understood why Eren beat himself up over his failures, though she didn’t necessarily agree with his reasoning. “So far, you’ve been training, but the greatest learning tool you’ll ever have are real-life situations where your life is genuinely in danger.”

“Like you’d know,” Eren muttered out. “You’ve never left the walls.”

There was a long silence, one where the only sound filling the room was the cat purring.

“Actually,” Faye hesitantly started, watching Eren, whose eyes snapped up to meet hers with his mouth agape. “Dad and I were found outside the walls when I was seven,” This was all news to her baby brother, and his wide eyes showed just how surprised he was by the news. “I don’t remember much, just taking down a few titans before we were saved.”

“You...” The titan shifter looked a little pale, the color draining from his face. “But how did you end up outside the walls? That’s against the law, isn’t it?”

“I don’t remember,” Faye lied, wetting her lips. “I don’t remember anything before dad, and I were found.” It was all a lie, and sometimes, she desperately wished it were true. At least if it were, Faye wouldn’t remember the few hundred lives she’d taken before she turned herself in.

“How come you and dad never told me?” Eren was caught between feeling betrayed and absolutely flabbergasted.

“There’s a lot of things we never told you,” She shrugged. “Some of it is better left unsaid. Too horrifying to remember.” Like her mother getting turned into a titan before Faye’s very eyes, or the men who used her body for their pleasure back in Shiganshina, or the titans she had encountered during her month wandering outside the walls with Grisha.

“But what-” Eren cut himself off abruptly, the look in Faye’s eyes chilling him right down to the bone. He’d only seen it on her a handful of times, most notably when Grisha Jaeger had been pronounced missing and when he caught a glimpse of Faye after she came home from getting shot a week prior. It was the look a seasoned vet wore, but it looked so much worse on Faye. Like she watched the world burn but could do nothing to stop the flames from eating everyone in its path.

“Anyways,” She hurried to change the subject, “You just need to get some real experience in and keep chipping away at your weaknesses.”

“Could you help me?” He shyly asked, eyes wide and hopeful. “Captain Levi is just…” Eren trailed off, struggling to find the right word to describe his childhood hero. “He’s too quiet, and sometimes his feedback doesn’t make sense.”

It baffled Faye how Eren came to that conclusion, especially considering every time Faye trained with him, all he could do was point out the many flaws in her technique with crippling detail. Regardless, though, if that was really how Eren was feeling, she couldn’t exactly turn a blind eye to it.

“Sure, you want to get some training in right now?” Slowly but surely, the dead look in Faye’s eyes dissipated, and Eren forced himself to nod. Maybe the training would get her mind off of everything, and by the looks of her room, it definitely couldn’t get any cleaner.

“Field in ten?” Eren asked, jumping off the bed.

“Let Levi know, and you’re on,” Faye grinned, watching her little brother’s back as he flew past her door. Her grin slowly dissipated, his lips twitching. It took her a minute, but she heaved herself off the bed.

“Alright, Beefy,” Faye sighed, opening her window. “I doubt Levi will be thrilled if I bring you with me, so you’ve got to go back out.” She watched as the cat gave her a pointed look, one that very well meant he wasn’t at all pleased with being kicked out of Faye’s room. Beef let out a lazy yawn, and he sent back one last glance before he leaped out the window, landing on the ground with a soft 'thump' before he padded into the bushes.

She stayed by the window, taking some time to gather her thoughts. She'd been expecting Eren to press her for more details about being outside the walls, but maybe it was best if he remained in the dark about it. At least for a little longer.

“Oi,” Levi knocked on the doorframe, looking for any sign of the cat Eren had dragged in. It looked relatively clean, but the fact that Faye's window was open told him all he needed to know. “You feeling okay enough to do some training with the brat?” The vet narrowed his eyes at Faye. She'd been overworking herself the last three days, and he was getting worried.

Faye nodded, taking her time to shut the window. “Are you coming with us?” She already knew the answer, but she asked out of courtesy to Levi.

“I’m stuck babysitting the little sh*t,” He deadpanned. “Of course I am.” Levi let out a soft snort, eyes narrowing when Faye turned to look at him with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. His fingers twitched, “Don’t smile at me if you don’t mean it.” He hadn’t meant for the words to actually leave his lips, but it was too late to take back now.

Shock coursed through Faye at a breakneck pace; she furrowed her brows. “Sorry,” It came out quietly. “Didn’t realize you’d notice. Nobody else has yet.”

The words ‘I noticed ’ burned in his throat, aching for him to verbalize them, but he swallowed them.

“I’ll see you out there in ten.” Was all he said, turning on his heel.

*

Eren's training had finished when dinner rolled around, though Faye skipped it, opting to sit in her office and work on the saddle packs. By the time she finished, the sky had gone dark. She sighed, grabbing a couple of blankets and a pillow before she shimmied out of her window, scaling the walls to reach the roof. She wasn't sure how long she'd been up there, but it didn't matter.

The sky was littered with tiny, bright stars, each one distantly flickering every so often, glimmering and shining for a short brunette to watch from the roof of a castle. She had laid down overtop a blanket with another draped over her legs and torso, content to quietly pretend the rest of the world didn’t exist and that the events of a particular week hadn’t come to pass.

She heard the footsteps before she heard the voice. They were soft, light on their toes, but they were too well balanced to be Eren.

“I’ve been looking for you for the last ten minutes,” The short captain impatiently stated. “I found your sh*tty cat; I figured you might want some company.” Earlier, when Levi watched Eren’s pitiful attempts at hunting the cat down, he realized the brat actually had a decent idea, and naturally, Levi stole it.

“Thanks,” Faye mumbled, holding her hands out for the cat, who was happy someone other than Humanity's Strongest was holding him. The cat vibrated, even through the thick blanket Faye had covered herself with. “You feel like stargazing?”

He didn’t say anything; he didn’t need to. Instead, he settled himself in next to her, taking off his shoes and accepting the blanket she held out to him before he laid on his back, staring up at the darkened sky.

“What’d you think about training?” She softly questioned. “Looks like Eren can finally stick a halfway decent landing now without scraping his legs up.” Faye insisted the boy learn how to properly land on his feet during the first half-hour of training, something her brother was awful at.

“He’s got a long way to go,” He simply commented.

“Do you think he’ll survive the expedition?” The thought had been heavy on Faye’s mind the last few days. Death had been lingering around every corner, and she wouldn’t be surprised if Eren or Alexander didn’t make it through the titan-infested territory.

“I promised you I’d look after him,” Levi reminded, “So stop worrying.” He wasn’t planning on leaving Eren unattended, and Erwin wouldn’t take any chances with the titan shifter. He was, after all, humanity’s last hope, and therefore, Levi had more than just an obligation to see through; he had a savior to protect.

A few heartbeats of silence passed between the pair, where the two got lost in their thoughts. Truthfully, Levi wasn’t sure why he’d sought Faye out at such a late hour; something in his bones begged him to find her, screaming out into the void in his soul that she needed the company, even if they didn’t talk.

“When I was a teenager, I used to sit on the roof of my tea shop and do this,” Her voice was soft, and out of the corner of his eye, Levi could see the even rise and fall of her chest. “If I stared long enough, it would feel like gravity was shifting, and instead of laying down, it would almost feel like I was falling forward.”

“My friends found a book on all the star constellations,” He wasn’t quite sure why he was saying anything, he could have just kept quiet, and she’d have been none the wiser. But instead, he swallowed down his pride. She was making an effort to have a conversation; the least he could do was contribute. This had been the most she’d spoken in the last three days, and truthfully, he missed the sound. “When we made it above ground, they’d spend the night on the roof, flipping through the book and pointing them out in the sky, forcing me to listen to their sh*tty origin stories.”

“I’ll bet you any money you secretly loved it,” Faye let out a small smile.

“Piss off,” He clicked his tongue, but he couldn’t help the small curve his lips took, an action so minuscule no one would ever see it unless they were looking for it.

“Alright,” Faye snorted. “Let’s not forget who stood in my garden and whistled for three minutes waiting for Beef to show up so that you could console me without needing to actually say anything.”

Levi’s heart stopped for a good second, “You saw that?” It came out in a breath of air, and he couldn’t be more grateful for the night sky hiding how red his ears had gone. “I just wanted to see if you were sh*tting me about the cat.”

“Which part?” Faye sarcastically inquired. “That Beef was real, or that he came when you whistled?”

“The whistling was kind of impressive,” He defended stoically. “Especially considering it’s a beast that licks its ass half the day.”

“You’re going to hurt his feelings,” Faye chided. “Next time, he won’t listen, and he really will sh*t in the garden.”

He let out a soft breath of air, and Faye relaxed onto the roof next to him, her shoulders easing into the blanket she was lying on. It was soothing, just to sit and banter with the short captain. Especially after the hellish week she’d had.

“So, are you going to point out any constellations?” She quipped, an eyebrow raised. “Because if you’re not, we can always just make our own and create some lore for them.” She needed something to take her mind off of it all.

“Like what?”

“See those stars, it kind of looks like the letter B,” She pointed over Levi’s chest, and he nodded, zeroing in exactly to where she wanted. “It’s the constellation of ‘ Beef ’ He was a cat god, and legend has it the moment Beef was put into the sky, two short captains gained a deep understanding of each other, and their friendship transcends time.”

“That’s a sh*tty legend,” Levi deadpanned. “Besides, I tolerate you. We’re not friends.”

“Oh, come on,” Faye’s hand jutted out to smack Levi’s shoulder. “You love me, and you know it.”

“Yeah,” Levi swallowed the lump in his throat. Maybe a little too much. “I guess you take shorter sh*ts than the rest of them.” He felt the rustle of the blankets as Faye shifted just a tad closer; he could feel the body heat her arm was giving off and the cat’s vibrations from on top of her stomach.

“My mom used to say all of those stars are souls and that even from beyond the grave, they’re watching over us, guarding us during the night,” Faye spoke with such a hopeful tone, Levi’s heart squeezed. “Maybe Orwell is up there, watching over Al’ and Petra.”

It was a long second, one that Humanity’s Strongest antagonized over for what felt like an eternity. Slowly, he shifted his arm, bumping into hers, and the tips of his fingers brushed against Faye’s.

“Don’t say sh*t like that,” He said it softly, his arm still against hers. When she laughed, he let out a breath he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding, like the world’s weight melted off of his shoulders in an instant. That was the first genuine laugh he’d heard her let out in three miserable days, and he welcomed it.

“Yeah,” Faye shrugged, laughter dying down while her heart contracted in her chest as all the lives she’d taken flashed inside her head. “Everyone I’ve ever killed is too busy haunting me to be up there.”

“Get that sh*t out of your head,” Levi gave a stern frown, fingers twitching against Faye’s. “What’s done is done. No need to beat yourself six feet into the ground just to meet them halfway.”

“I’m not,” She protested vehemently. “But I deserve to feel guilty for all of them. I took their lives and-”

“You think I haven’t killed my sh*tty fair share?” He cooly questioned, the air chilling Faye’s bones. “I know how you feel, and I’m telling you to let them go.” He sent a pointed look at the woman next to him, hoping his glare would finally scare her into listening to him like it did most everyone else.

The urge to argue bubbled inside of Faye, and she opened her lips to disagree, but the words died in her throat, fizzling out before she even knew what they were. Dejection knocked the wind out of her, leaving the medic to slump her shoulders and listen to the quiet purr of the cat.

“People keep comparing me to a god,” Faye’s expression dulled as she spoke. “I feel like they don’t even see me as human, and they’re all expecting me to fix everything,” She faltered, face crumpling. “And I feel like I need to bear the weight of it all so that no one else has to.” She wasn’t going to cry, but the emotions were raw, passing by on Faye’s face in a moment of helplessness.

Levi felt the air leave his chest, a strangled emotion clawing its way up his constricted throat as he listened. He understood the very sentiment she’d described in crippling accuracy.

“Get over yourself,” He forced a huff of air in. Now wasn’t the time to get emotional. “Stop your pity party and pick yourself off the ground,” Sure, his words were harsh, but Faye didn’t strike him as they type to take it all so sensitively. “You’re only flesh and bone, so start acting like it.”

“And if I can’t?”

“Then I’ll lighten the load,” Levi clicked his tongue. “Your sh*tty cat can help too; he looks like he needs something to fill his time with.”

“That’s the first time you haven’t called Beef ‘It’” Despite the dissonance crushing Faye’s chest; she managed a weak, sincere, toothy smile. “Does this mean we can keep him?”

“Absolutely not,” Levi turned to glare at the cat, “The beast was covered in dirt when I found it, and he’s not tracking any of that sh*t through my corridors.”

“What if I told you he could scare away all my ghosts?” Faye argued.

“Then he can do that from outside.”

Silence ensued as the pair eyed the stars trying to discern their emotions from the conversation.

“Did you mean it when you said you’d lighten the load?” She quietly inquired, swallowing the doubt nestled deep in her throat.

“If I said I would, then I obviously meant it.” He didn’t shift his gaze, and the words came out monotonously. To him, it wasn’t even a question; it was a promise. “If anyone in the walls is going to understand you, it would, unfortunately, be me, you sh*tty doctor.”

“Maybe the Constellation of Beef is real,” Faye mused, a small tilt to her lips.

“Piss off,” Levi grumbled, “I knew it was real the day you called me out on my bullsh*t.”

“When the MPs searched my shop?” Her brows had furrowed, shifting to look at Levi, who was fixated on the moon. “How’d you know?”

“Gut feeling,” He shrugged. “Not a whole lot of people who actively bad mouth Humanity’s Strongest to his face,” His lips curled just slightly, “It was refreshing. I needed to get knocked down a peg or two.”

“Or five,” Faye snorted. “The first time you met Al’, you nearly threw him in jail.”

“He’s not going to last in the Scouts.”

Even though Faye had already expressed the same thought, Levi’s words still winded her. Before she could process what she was doing, she had scrambled into a sitting position, gently shifting Beef off of her chest. Her heart was pounding, the blood rushing through her ears while the sudden movement made her slightly dizzy.

“Why would you say that?” She breathed.

“You were right when you said he’s not ready for this expedition,” Levi leveled, slowly matching her movements and straightening out as he sat up.

“I know,” She sucked in a breath. “He’s clumsy on the gear, he doesn’t have enough muscle to cut through a titan, and if he doesn’t get eaten, he’s going to get crushed by uselessness.” Another deep breath caused her heart to slow. “I think I’m going to take over his training myself.”

Levi’s hand shot out, clutching at the low bun Faye had used his cravat for and pulling her nose to nose with him aggressively.

“You’re doing it again,” he articulated, his breath fanning Faye’s lips. “We’ll do it together. You’ll be too soft on him.”

She couldn’t even argue, so she settled for nodding, gently leaning away, but as her nose distanced itself from his. Levi’s fingers tangled into her hair and deftly pulled his cravat loose, along with the rest of Faye’s previously held-back hair. He had refrained from asking for the fabric to be returned since John’s death but now felt like an appropriate time to take it back.

He inspected it closely, satisfied that she’d kept it from getting any dirt or blood on it. His chest vibrated when he hummed out and tucked it into his shirt, feeling more at peace than he had in a long time before he laid back down, tugging at Faye’s elbow for her to follow him.

“Thank you,” She subconsciously shifted closer to Levi, “For entrusting me with that. It meant a lot.”

“Whatever,” He grunted. “Don’t expect for it to happen again.”

*

Faye had fallen asleep sometime near three in the morning, curling into Levi's chest, and the captain didn't have the heart to wake the medic up. He told himself he was just going to rest his eyes, let Faye get a quick nap in before he woke her back up, and insist she return to bed. Then, like a complete moron, he woke up to a beautiful pink and orange sunrise, with the doctor pressed against his chest, their legs tangled together.

He squinted at Faye from across the room. Gunther was talking, but it all droned into the background. Levi couldn't even remember the last time he'd fallen asleep with a woman in his arms. Maybe Isabel? Back when she first moved in with him and Furlan? The memory was hazy, and the grumpy captain couldn't discern if it had actually happened, or if he was making it all up.

“What’s going on with Captain Levi and you?” Al’ whispered, eyes darting back to glance at the grumpy captain, whose eyes had narrowed at Faye. “He looks like he’s ready to skewer you.”

The doctor slowly looked over her shoulder, but she frowned when Levi snapped his head in the other direction, pretending to listen to Gunther.

“No clue,” Faye lied. He’d been acting weird since he woke her up on the roof at dawn. Granted, if anyone else had seen the two, it would have been considered a compromising and inappropriate situation. Legs tangled together with Levi holding Faye to his chest as she slept. Maybe he was embarrassed..?

“Do you think that he makes a lot of constipation comments because he’s projecting?”

“He’ll gut you if he hears you,” Faye grinned, loading a bowl up with soup. “I wouldn’t test his patience; you’re already on thin ice with Levi as is.”

“Seriously, Faye. What did you do to piss him off? He's ready to pop a blood vessel.” Alexander’s mood soured when he chanced another look back only to find the captain glaring straight at him. “How come you’re the only one who's actually friends with him?”

“Might have something to do with the plates you threw at him,” The doctor quipped, waiting for Alexander to finish loading his military ration onto the plate. “Or maybe he’s stressed because the expedition is only a week away. Could be anything.”

“Speaking of the expedition,” Al’ slowly started, balancing his plate on a tray as he fell into step with Faye. “You’re sure I should sit this one out?” It wasn’t that he disagreed with his captain; he was worried that she’d be stuck on the field without him. Next to the medic, he had the most experience with life-threatening injuries - even if he had no clue how to treat half of them.

“Yup. Levi and I are going to start training you personally after this one to make sure you’re completely ready for the next.” They’d had an extensive conversation about handling Alexander’s training the night before, so as soon as they got a schedule for the next month, they’d start teaching the boy. “Besides, I’d rather scope out the field before you so I can prepare you for what you’ll see.”

“Good enough for me,” Alex earnestly shrugged, following Faye into the infirmary.

“Do you mind tidying up when I leave for HQ?” Faye inquired, skirting around a few extra medical bags. She'd been mass-producing salves and pills for the last three and a half days, and today was the day the medic was delivering them all to the Scouts headquarters. “And make sure you get these to Levi’s squad.”

Alexander watched Faye start on her soup, and he couldn’t let the question simmer in his mind for much longer.

“Why didn’t you go to Uncle John’s funeral?” He’d been wondering about it since the day after he committed suicide when Faye had pulled him aside during the day to tell him of her decision quietly. “You were the last one to talk to him, so I just don’t get why you wouldn’t want to pay your respects.”

Meanwhile, Petra’s hand hovered over the doorknob in the corridor as she listened with rapt attention. The same question had been nagging at her, too. However, she would never have asked the doctor so bluntly.

Faye wet her lips, trying to think of how to answer Alexander’s question. How was she supposed to put her feelings into words that would convey her thoughts?

“I’m going to visit him one of these days,” She quietly stated. “But I think if I went to his funeral, my mental health would have taken a bigger hit than it already has.” She held eye contact with Al’, trying to give him an apologetic smile. “I’m trying my best to be there for you, but there’s only so much I can do.”

“You always put me before you,” Alexander’s voice had started to catch on his throat, and he struggled to get the words dislodged from his throat. “But how come you don’t have anyone putting your needs above theirs?” He sounded like a child, and the way he stared into Faye’s soul made her breath hitch.

“It’s always been like this,” She softly conceded.

“But it doesn’t have to be,” He looked like he was grasping at straws, an anguished curve on the boy’s lips. “I know I don’t understand everything about you, but-”

“Al’,” Petra couldn’t see Faye, but she imagined the doctor leaning forward and gently holding Alexander’s hand. “Don’t worry about me. Focus on moving forward at your own pace instead of trying to catch up to me.”

“But you-”

“I’ve got Levi and Erwin to talk to about my feelings,” Faye assured. “What do you think we do during our weekly meetings?”Alexander let out a snort, prompting Faye to continue in a softer tone, “I’m going to tell you about it all, but you’ll be in a lot of trouble if I don’t tell Erwin and Levi first.”

Petra steeled herself, taking a deep breath in before she knocked. It seemed like she’d eavesdropped for long enough of a private conversation. She heard the doctor call from behind the door, signaling for Petra to step into the infirmary.

“Captain Levi is wondering when we’re planning on leaving,” The eldest Ral sibling informed, eyes trailing over to Alexander, who had his back turned to her while he ate. “He said he’d like to speak with you before we go.”

“Do you mind preparing the horses and cart?” Faye asked, stretching as she got to her feet. “I’ll go see him right now. Do you think you can be ready to leave in ten minutes?” The medic waited for Petra to leave before she addressed Alexander again, “My bed is open tonight if you need it. I’ll probably be back pretty late, though.”

The lanky twenty-year-old nodded, sighing to himself before he got to his feet and pulled Faye into a hug. “Just make it back in one piece. It feels like every time you leave the castle, you get hurt.”

“Will do,” Faye pulled away, already slinging her small medical bag over her shoulder. “I’ll see you when I get back.”

Alexander let out a heavy sigh when the door shut, and his eyes settled on the half-eaten soup. That was the third meal the doctor hadn’t finished…

It wasn’t long before Faye and Petra set out with a wagon full of medical supplies. Petra held the reins, leaving Faye to lean back in her seat and enjoy the sunny day. The clouds were high in the sky, though they were sparse.

“Are you planning on returning to your tea shop with Alex when Trost reopens?” Petra inquired, relaxing into her seat.

“I can’t see myself abandoning the regiment,” Faye truthfully shrugged. “I think there’s a lot that I can do to help, and discharging would cause an uproar. Especially with Erwin.” The Commander would probably go back to hassling Faye about rejoining, and she’d never hear the end of it.

“I was thinking,” Petra reluctantly started. “I’d like to go on leave for a few months with Alexander.” The words tasted foreign on the ginger’s tongue, though there was blatant familiarity with the sentence. “I’d like to spend some time with him and my father while I still have can.”

“I think he’d like that,” Alexander had never been fit for the military, so the sooner he got out, the better. “Al’s been looking for an excuse to hang out with you, so this gives you guys a good opportunity to reconnect.”

“You think so?” Petra’s heart hammered against her chest. “How would I even go about asking him?”

The eldest Ral sibling was vulnerable, and Faye recognized it within the instant. The wide, doe-eyed look, the slightly furrowed brows, the slightly clenched jaw. It was a look she’d seen on Alexander time and time again.

“Just tell him what you told me,” Faye softly smiled. “He’s not unreasonable, and I think it would do him well to have some time away from me.” Alexander has started using Faye as an emotional crutch, and even though the doctor didn’t mind it, she still thought he needed a better support system. Something Petra could offer with her father. “I think your dad would really enjoy having his kids around too.”

“Our whole family keeps dying off one by one,” Petra murmured, “I think the stress is really getting to my dad.” Her mind flashed to how her father had looked during the funeral. Gaunt, depressed, anxious. He was clinging onto Petra like his life depended on it. “Maybe he’ll even take work off to help with the shop.”

“Why don’t you talk to Erwin about getting the paperwork for your leave?” Faye suggested. “We’re going to see him anyways.”

*

Erwin stood in the loading bay of HQ, looking over the packs of medical supplies Faye and Petra had brought in. There were over 300 saddle sacks ready for use, meaning there were even a few extra for captains and squad leaders to ride with in case one of the soldiers lost or used theirs up.

“Alexander’s been working on them for the last week,” Faye hastily explained, “So he’s the one you should be thanking.”

“I see,” Erwin’s chest rumbled as he spoke, thoroughly impressed at the sheer number of packs Faye and Alexander had assembled in time for the expedition. “Please send him my regards.” His eyes slid over to the medic, who looked to be in better spirits than the last time he’d seen her.

“I think Petra has some matters to discuss with you,” Faye informed, jutting her chin at the Special Ops soldier next to her. “Do you mind if I find Mike while you guys chat?”

Oh.

She was excited to see Mike.

Of course.

Erwin nodded, “He’s in the field with his squad. Ms. Ral, if you’d please,” He let his gaze linger on Faye before he turned.

“Erwin,” The medic called, just as his foot took a step. “Do you want some tea after Petra is done talking to you?”

The Commander froze, his heart contracting while his chest warmed. A small smile graced his lips as he dipped his head, falling back into step before he spoke over his shoulder, “If you wouldn’t mind.”

Faye shot Petra a reassuring smile before she set out in search of Mike. Her steps were jittery, filled with excitement to see the lanky squad leader.

When she stepped outside, she squinted against the sun, staring at the soldiers zipping around on the ODM gear. Mike, of course, was easy to discern between the others, and as soon as she saw the tall captain, she broke into a sprint.

“Mike!” Faye called, “I missed you!” Her arms wrapped around Mike’s torso as she pulled him in for a hug, grinning from ear to ear.

“Shouldn’t you be training?” Mike raised a brow, pulling away to regard Faye properly. “There’s only a week until the expedition, aren’t you nervous?” He didn’t know why he was even asking; the woman was an enigma and went against most social norms.

“I think you got taller,” Faye craned her neck to look at the tree-like captain.

“Maybe you just got shorter,” He retorted with an eye-roll. “Good to see you still smell the same.”

“It was creepy the first time you did it, and nothing has changed since then,” The medic quipped. “Maybe Al’ was right when he said you have the nose of a dog.” She let a heartbeat pass before she added, “You definitely still look like one too. You need a haircut.”

“I think I look good,” Mike defended.

“Has Nanaba told you that recently?” A sly smile overtook Faye’s lips as a blush crept onto Mike’s cheeks.

“What are you talking about?” He tried to play it off, crossing his arms as he leaned into the breeze, trying to cool the redness on his face. “Nanaba is my second in command, so if you’re implying-”

“Alright, alright,” Faye abated, raising her hands in mock surrender. “Do you feel like making some tea for Erwin with me?”

He trailed beside Faye, a smug smirk curling his lips upward, “He’s been bringing you an awful lot of flowers lately. Haven’t seen him leave without a bouquet and a tin of tea, what’s the deal with that?”

“So you noticed?” Faye quipped, “It’s his way of apologizing for being nosy.”

Mike couldn’t exactly disagree that The Commander had a curious streak, so it didn’t surprise him that he’d tried to pry about Faye’s life.

“Still not wearing the uniform, I see.”

“Alright, you tall behemoth,” Faye clicked her tongue, “If I’m going to wear a jacket, I’d like it to fit over my stomach.”

“What, are you self-conscious?” Mike’s brows knitted together as he spared a glance down to the short captain. To him, she looked like every other soldier: Fit. So he didn’t really see the problem. Sure, she wore trousers and tucked her shirt in, but she still looked feminine, so maybe it was something else?

“My blood circulation is really sh*tty,” It was a small truth, but Faye was still relieved she didn’t have to lie about it. “I’ll wear the cape on the expedition, but the jacket won’t do a whole lot for me in terms of actually keeping me warm. Not to mention the one I was issued is a little too small.”

“You should talk to Erwin and get a replacement,” Mike advised, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. “Might be beneficial to you on one of the expeditions.”

“I’ll manage without it,” Faye grinned. “Besides, I look cooler in civilian clothes.”

“Women and their bizarre fashion senses.”

Chapter 17: 13. Expedition

Chapter Text

The sun was high in the sky, beating down on the soldiers who sat atop their horses, waiting for the 57th Expedition to start. The air buzzed with nervous jitters as the Scouts bounced around Calaneth. A lanky redhead and a short brunette stood under the shade of a nearby tree, just far enough away from the soldiers to have some privacy in their conversation.

“He’s sure his plan is going to work?” Alexander Ral’s nerves had been on high alert since he woke up, thinking of all the worst outcomes the 57th Expedition might bring. “How does he even know they’re after Eren?”

“He thinks the Colossal and Armoured Titans are both shifters, and the reason they didn’t break through the inner wall in Trost was because Eren showed up in titan form. They’re going to try and recruit him, one way or another.”

A few heartbeats passed in contemplative silence. Eren was just a kid, and already, he was being dragged into the same bullsh*t Faye went through with the Warriors.

“Faye,” Alexander tugged on Faye’s sleeve in a childlike manner. “You’re going to be okay, right?” He’d been fretting over his captain the entire morning, double and triple-checking her gear and packs.

“Al’,” Faye was flattered that he was so nervous for her, but he was being overbearing. “I’ll be fine. Focus on finishing the paperwork, and grab some tea with your dad while he’s still in town.”

“But what if something goes wrong?” His bright eyes bore into Faye’s, searching for any doubts or concerns. “What if there are too many for you to handle? What if they damage your gear? Or take out your horse?” He was sending himself into a spiral. “Faye,” He shuddered in a breath, “I can’t cremate another loved one; please don’t make me plan your funeral. I can’t.”

“I promise I’ll make it back in one piece,” The medic assured. “Now, do I get a goodbye hug, or are we just going to stare at each other awkwardly?”

“Is that even a question?” The lanky soldier snorted, pulling Faye into a bone-crushing hug. “Just please,” He quietly urged, “Be careful.” He leaned his head down, pressing a chaste kiss to Faye’s forehead before he stepped backward. “Off you go. Before I change my mind about staying.”

“Make sure you stop by the castle and grab Beef,” Faye reminded. “I want to take him to HQ with us.”

“Aye aye, captain,” Alexander saluted, trying his best not to let Faye know just how worried he really was about the expedition. Something in his bones told him Erwin’s plan wasn’t going to play out quite so smoothly, and regardless of how awry his plan went, Faye was certain to be dead center of it all.

The medic turned away from her best friend, venturing further through the sea of green cloaks. It had been the first time she’d actually bothered to put on the iconic green cloak, and a small part of her hated it. She felt too...uniform with the rest of them, and it filled her mind with intrusive thoughts, memories from her time in the Warrior Program.

Mike stood just a few paces away from Erwin, Hange, and Levi with an extra horse. He kept his facial expression stoic, though when the lanky squad leader spotted Faye, he dipped his head in acknowledgment, holding the reins up for her to see.

“Thanks for holding onto Chicken,” Faye grinned, petting the horse’s snout.

“Are you going to be alright?” He watched Faye hoist herself up onto the horse, “This is your first time going into titan territory, isn’t it?” Mike’s brows furrowed at the lax expression the medic wore, even as she shifted on the saddle, getting comfortable.

“Second time,” Faye corrected, leaning her shoulders back and feeling her back pop. Slowly, her bones and muscles were settling back into the familiar environment: On alert, but not tense. “I’m a lot more armed than last time, too.”

“I’m still not sure how useful a rifle is going to be outside the walls,” Mike mumbled, warily eying the gun strapped to Faye’s back. “Titans heal too quickly for them to make a difference.”

“You’re not shooting them in the right places, then,” The doctor shrugged. “You can blind them and knock a tooth or two out.”

“Teeth?” The lanky squad leader’s brows involuntarily rose. He’d never even considered aiming for a tooth, though now that Faye had mentioned it, it made sense. A soldier could easily slip out of the mouth if a tooth or two were missing. “How’d you come up with that?”

Erwin had started shouting, addressing his regiment, but Faye didn’t pay much attention to his words. He had run his speech by her earlier, so she wasn’t missing out on a whole lot.

“Personal experience,” She shrugged. “Even if they get you in their mouth, it’s just a matter of avoiding their teeth and not getting swallowed. You can always use the gear and slice through their neck from the inside.”

“Interesting,” Hange’s voice carried as their horse cantered to join Faye and Mike. “Have you ever tried that? Or are you just theorizing?”

The mad scientist made Faye wary. It was in the grin Hange wore whenever titans were mentioned. The night they questioned Faye on her extensive medical knowledge hadn’t exactly helped with the doctor’s apprehensiveness with them either.

“A little of both,” Faye admitted. “The inside of a titans mouth is a lot… softer. The tissue and muscle are less tough to slice through, but since it’s an enclosed space, your time to get out is significantly shorter until you risk getting burned by the steam. That’s where the ODM gear comes in handy.”

Hange was internally swearing, using every profanity they knew to curse Erwin Smith to hell. He’d purposefully kept Faye away from them, knowing she had all this knowledge that nobody else could even begin to fathom. The woman was a walking paradox; at first glance, Faye looked like every other civilian: ignorant. But the more layers Hange peeled back, the more she realized how well educated Faye was.

“Maybe when we get back, I can pick your brain on the subject,” Hange’s mind was already spinning at the prospect of all the facts Faye knew about titans.

“I don’t know,” Faye teetered on her horse, “Are you planning on assaulting me again?”

“You still haven’t answered my questions on that,” Hange deftly pointed out, their aura darkening. “One of these days, I’ll pry the truth from your lips, just you wait. Secrets can only stay buried for so long.”

“Oi,” Levi’s horse trotted next to Hange’s, and the short captain wore an irritated frown. “Stop pestering our only medic, sh*tty-Glasses,” He seemed more tense than usual, but from what Faye could tell, he looked like he’d actually gotten some sleep the night before. “Besides, Erwin’s speech is almost done, and she needs to get into formation.”

Faye’s ears registered, taking a second to listen to Erwin, but just as she opened her lips to object, Levi had snatched the reins from her hand and had started leading Chicken away from the mad scientist and tree-like squad leader.

“You scared?” He gruffly asked, slowing his horse to trot next to Faye’s. He let his eyes linger, taking in the green cape she sported. It was too dark to be compared to the medic’s eye color, but with the way the sun was shining and the forested green of the cape, her eyes jumped out, glinting sharper than any blade he’d wielded.

“I’ll manage-”

“That’s not what I asked,” Levi huffed, his frown deepening. “I asked if you were scared.”

“Not half as much as I should be,” She decidedly confessed. Her heart wasn’t hammering, and she wasn’t panicking. “I’m supposed to be sticking with your squad, so I know I’ll be fine. Worst comes to worst; you can hold my hand and tell me I look pretty before I die,” Faye smiled, watching Levi shift uncomfortably at her morbid sense of humor.

“Don’t say sh*t like that,” Levi swallowed. “If you’re going to die, I’d rather it be swift.”

“I’ve been meaning to ask you,” Faye fiddled with the reins, trying not to recede into herself. “You’ve been dodging me all week. Did I do something to piss you off?” Sure, she wasn’t anxious about the upcoming expedition, but she was definitely panicked about her friendship with Levi. The man had been acting weird since their night on the roof, and he avoided Faye like she was the plague.

Levi blinked, his heart thudding against his ribs. His ears were burning, and he could barely see straight. His mouth had gone dry, and the only sound he could actually manage to dislodge from his throat was the word: “No.” And then, like a complete moron, he nudged his knee into the horse, prompting his horse to canter forward just so Faye wouldn’t see the awkward, miserable frown on his face.

The short captain figured he must have gotten a few wires crossed during the last week. He reminded himself of a toddler trying to use ODM gear, shooting wires, and accidentally tangling them all up into a mess. Every time Levi tried to talk to Faye, all he could think of was waking up to her wrapped in his arms on the roof, their legs entwined together while the sun peeked over the wall in the distance, bathing the two in the crisp air and warm light. Levi had never considered himself a man prepared to die, but the longer he thought about it, the more he realized he would have been happy to pass away quietly in the moment. He was pathetic.

Faye, meanwhile, watched Levi’s back as he hurried away from her company. “Wonder if I whined too much,” She mumbled to herself, following Levi’s form through the crowd of soldiers.

“Faye,” Petra whispered, tugging Faye out of her thoughts. “I sent in my paperwork today. Alexander and I should hopefully be going on leave in three months.”

“That should be just in time for Trost to reopen, too,” Faye noted, excited that her tea shop would be back in business soon. “Have you thought of any tea infusions you want to create?” In truth, experimenting with the blends had been Faye’s favorite part of owning a tea shop, so she was excited to see what Petra came up with during the near future.

“Not yet,” The ginger shrugged. “I’m hoping Alex can show me the ropes and ease me into it.” She glanced over to Levi before Petra inched closer to Faye, continuing to whisper, “No one else knows except Commander Erwin, so I’d appreciate it if you kept quiet about it.”

“Scouts, move out!” Erwin’s voice bellowed from the gates as they opened, prompting the throng of horses and soldiers to speed after him.

“I will,” Faye called over the shouts to Petra, getting ready to follow her comrades into titan territory. Everyone moved swiftly, and though Levi didn’t spare the medic any glances, he kept his horse close to hers.

Behind the dilapidated buildings, Faye could hear the support squad shouting commands to one another as they defended the main troops, keeping the titans at bay just long enough for them to pass through.

“You know your flare signals?” Levi questioned as they passed the gate.

“Orange tells me someone needs help. If I need help, I fire off a grey flare,” Faye called back, muscles on high alert. “If they’re not saveable, I send up a pink one.” She wasn’t tense like everyone else, the medic was too well versed with titans, and her time in the trenches back in Marley had taught her that the tighter she held herself, the more energy she exerted. Energy she could use for better things, like keeping her ass out of a titans maw.

“Don’t be stubborn with the grey and pink flares,” The grouchy man ordered. “We can’t afford to let you die.”

“How do you feel about your first expedition?” Eld called, making conversation as they sped through the ruins of Wall Maria just outside the walls.

“So far, so good.” Her shoulders eased as she leaned forward, urging Chicken to move faster. “All the injuries back at the castle have been pretty minor, so I’m looking forward to stepping my game up.” Faye glanced back just in time to see the last of the Scouts leave the gate.

It was a different side of Faye that Levi witnessed that day. The cool, serious side that rarely peeked through the persona she built up. She wasn’t smiling, but she wasn’t frowning either. Usually, during training, there would be small instances where her muscle memory kicked in, and her lighthearted demeanor dissolved within an instant, but it always came back in a few minutes when Faye wasn’t in danger of being injured. It was different now, though. Sure, she’d been cordial in replying to Eld, but the voice didn’t match the expression on her face. Instead, she was focused on her surroundings, concentrated on keeping her eyes and ears peeled for signals and unwelcome sounds.

The long-range formation took shape when the last of the scouts made it into the open greenery, leaving Faye to fall behind Levi’s squad while she kept an eye out. The only sounds that registered in Faye’s head were the footfalls of Chicken and the breeze. However, she supposed that was better than hearing ominous thumps, signaling a titan was nearby.

Distantly, a flare sounded. Red billowed into the sky while Faye frowned. Figures that the front row would see a titan first, though she hadn’t expected it to be quite so soon. It was all a waiting game to see how Erwin would react, so Faye patiently waited for the green signal flare to be shot into the sky before she adjusted her course.

For the most part, Faye rode forwards, keeping an eye out for the smoke signals, but the longer it took, the more her stomach dropped. There should have been more titan sightings, but the red flares hadn’t been used in over ten minutes.

Black smoke billowed up to the doctor's right before several other streams followed its lead.

Armin was supposed to be somewhere in that direction, wasn’t he?

Another black flare went up.

No. Faye couldn’t break formation. If he needed help, he’d send up an orange flare. Not to mention he knew the basics of first aid and how to suture a wound. “He survived The Battle for Trost,” Faye reminded herself. “If he didn’t die then, he won’t die now.”

Just as she went to avert her gaze back to the front, orange smoke flew high into the sky from the far right-wing.

Good, something to do rather than aimlessly ride forward.

When Faye arrived on the scene, her heart plummeted. It was a massacre. Bodies littered the ground while titans meandered the grasslands, munching and crunching on fallen soldiers. Blood watered the vegetation, painting it all crimson and scenting the air. If anyone on the right-wing was alive, they should have fired off a yellow flare.

Faye loaded a yellow signal before she shot it into the air with a grim frown. A few seconds later, pink flew into the sky, and Faye gave one last look to the titan-infested grounds before she took off.

Personally, Faye figured Erwin had a death wish. Maybe it was subconscious or something, but the man had a penchant for danger and putting his men in harm's way. Of course, this whole expedition was a lie, meant to lure out the spy who’d killed off Hange’s pet titans. If they weren’t careful, Eren really would be abducted, and if her sixth sense was right, that meant Faye was next.

“Hey,” Faye called, easily catching up with a small group of spotters. “Right-wing is all dead. Pass the message down the line.”

Another orange flare billowed to the left.

It was a man; he looked familiar, probably from the physicals or her first aid training. Whatever it was, he definitely knew who she was.

“Captain Jaeger,” He addressed, clutching his arm tightly. “I’ve been trying to keep a steady pressure on my injury, but-” His lips curled down, and he looked almost...Ashamed. “But there’s just so much blood.” His hands were shaking uncontrollably.

“Take off your jacket and let me see,” Faye slid down her horse, grabbing some saline solution from one of the saddle packs. She kept her face neutral despite the squelch his jacket gave off when he pulled it off, revealing the bite marks down on his forearm. "Alright, this is going to be a mutual operation," She steadied Chicken, pulling out a bottle of whiskey. "You keep watch and drink; I'm going to sew. Don't get us both eaten," She handed the bottle over, fingers opening her medical bag.

"Captain, we're sitting ducks-"

"Listen," She interjected, laying out her supplies. "You're losing a lot of blood. Too much. If I don't do something, you're going to die." There was no hint of a joking manner, and reluctantly, the soldier screwed open the cap on the bottle and settled down on the ground, taking a large gulp. "Not too much; you're still on duty." She handed him pills before she started disinfecting the curved needle.

The bite marks looked painful, like he'd been jolted around while his arm was between the teeth, and when she doused the wound in saline solution, she bit back a growl. She could see the white of his bone peeking through all the muscle and tissue.

“I’ve never seen a titan like it before,” He bitterly muttered out. “Some kind of Female Titan. Didn’t look interested in eating any of us.”

Isopropyl alcohol drenched his arm, and the soldier let out a guttural hiss, the sound evaporating just as quickly as titan steam. Faye ignored it all, she'd spent twenty-five years listening to patients groan and whimper, and the man only added to the numbers. He'd get over it once the pain meds kicked in. They always did.

"Keep talking," She softly instructed, "It helps keep your mind off the pain." She wasn't really sure if that was true. Every time Faye had ever gotten seriously injured, she forced the whimpers down to maintain her dignity. "Tell me about the titan."

She put her knee overtop his hand, digging it into the ground while she leaned on his shoulder, keeping the limb still as she hooked the needle into his skin. He jolted, but Faye's body weight kept him in place as she continued.

"Took us out like we were ants," He grunted. "None of us could even react, and she brought a horde of titans with her-sh*t!" He brought the bottle to his lips again, taking a hefty swig.

"Slow breaths." Faye reminded, "In through the nose, out through the mouth." He was doing pretty well, considering the painkillers hadn't kicked in yet. She couldn't give him morphine, not until they got back to the walls or made camp for the night; it was too risky. Too many titans, and the spy- which she heavily assumed was the Female Titan given the soldier's words- hadn't been found out yet.

"The rumors didn't do you justice," The soldier let out a wheezy chuckle. "You're a lot prettier than anyone gave you credit for."

"Yeah?" Faye dully asked. "What exactly are these rumors?"

"A lot of people think you used to be some kind of hotshot criminal," His eyes screwed shut again, "Something about poison. Didn't get all the details-f*ck- Some people think you're secretly part of the royal family-" He stared up at the sky, not noticing the way Faye's jaw clenched together. "-and that's why you got such a lenient sentence in your court hearing. Explains why you've got the face of a goddess."

"That's awfully flattering," Faye ground out, tying off a suture. "Nice to know my skincare routine is paying off." Again, the needle went in. "Criminal part is pretty accurate."

"Oh sh*t, you mean you really worked with Kenny the Ripper? No f*cking way," He breathed, eyes snapping to the side to regard Faye. "He didn't kill you?"

"I know him," She passively stated. "Met him when I was fifteen. Crazy bastard said I reminded him of his nephew." Faye had no clue who this nephew of his was, but if she resembled him, he couldn't have been as insane as his uncle. No one was as insane as Kenny the Ripper.

"What was he like?" The soldier's eyes were wide with wonder, ignoring the burning sensation of his skin being pulled together via a needle and thread. He was blatantly enthralled with Faye, eager to learn more about the Wall's most notorious serial killer. No one could figure out if Kenny the Ripper was to be feared or revered. Sure, he killed many innocent people, but he also took down a lot of phony Military Police.

"He really likes sweets," Faye wet her lips, again tying the suture. "Always bought some pastries before he left." It was a mundane fact, but it had always stuck out in her head. Something about how his nephew didn't like them, and since he was all grown up, he could finally indulge. She hadn't really listened to the explanation. "He was my favorite customer. Never got handsy and even stepped in when another one tried threatening me." Despite his unhinged personality, he had some moral code he lived by. "Taught me a little bit about knife fights."

"You?" The soldier wheezed. "In a knife fight?" He shook his head in disbelief. "You're too angelic for that."

"Keep hitting on me, and you'll experience first hand just how lethal I am," She admonished.

Faye finished sewing him up shortly after, carefully helping the soldier tug on his jacket.

“Get back in formation as soon as possible,” She grunted, gathering her supplies and dumping them back into her saddle sack. "Don't use that arm for any heavy lifting, and don't rip those stitches. You've already lost a considerable amount of blood, and I'll be pissed if I have to re-suture your arm." Faye pulled herself onto her horse, watching the soldier do the same. "Stay safe." She nudged her horse into a canter, heading forward through the grassy plains.

Green smoke flew into the air, and like a moth to a flame, Faye followed. Chicken galloped like the wind, passing by a few soldiers on the way, and just as Levi’s squad came into view, black smoke billowed into the air again.

Eld must’ve spotted Faye because he called out to Levi, jutting his head back to alert the short captain of her arrival.

“What happened to the right-wing?” Levi questioned, keeping his pace at the head of his squad. “We heard they got wiped out.” He didn't look at all happy, and the worry lines beneath his eyes seemed much deeper than an hour prior.

“Dead. All of them,” Faye’s bitterness of the situation shone through; her lips pulled into a thin line. She shifted her horse closer to his, gauging the distance between the captains and the rest of the squad before she added in a low voice: “I think they're like Eren.”

“Faye, are you staying?” Eren hollered, pushing his horse to catch up with the captains.

“No,” She sent her little brother what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “I’m meeting up with Erwin. I figured I should stop to chat with Humanity’s Grumpiest first, though. That’s all.” She turned back to Levi, “I’m heading off. Don't die.” She waited for him to give a curt nod before she continued her journey.

As Faye pressed on, she frowned. There should have been more orange flares. Maybe she was just being paranoid? On the other hand, she’d taught them a pretty decent first aid course, so hopefully, they were utilizing what they learned.

By the looks of it, Erwin had ventured straight into a small forest, slowing just as he reached a pathway leading in. He wore a contemplative eye, inspecting his surroundings and stopping briefly when he noticed Faye riding straight towards him.

“Have you seen the abnormals?” He questioned, subtly blocking Hange’s horse from Faye.

“It’s just one,” She answered. “I think she’s a shifter.” It wasn’t anxiety that welled in Faye’s stomach, maybe something more akin to dread.

“She?” Erwin’s thick eyebrows rose. “I wasn’t aware titans could be gendered.”

“I’m basing it off of what another soldier told me,” She dismissed. “Listen, if she’s who we think she is, then-”

“Already accounted for,” Erwin started his horse again, beckoning Faye to follow along with two fingers. “Inform everyone behind us,” He called loudly over his shoulder. “Only the center wagon defense squad is to enter this forest,” He ordered before a chorus of soldiers sounded behind him, leaving to inform the rest of the scouts.

“So what else have you found out about titans?” Hange’s horse nearly crashed into Faye’s at how close they followed with a borderline maniacal grin. They’d been carefully considering the conversation they had heard earlier between Faye and Mike, eager to test out the doctor’s theory.

“Hange,” Mike warned, no more than a few paces away. He wasn’t eager to let the mad scientist anywhere near the medic; the last time they’d been in a room together, Faye ended up with a bloody nose and bruises that lasted a week.

“What about their density?” Hange pressed. “Have you noticed anything bizarre?”

“Not in particular,” Faye let out, leaning forward on Chicken to catch up to Erwin. “We can talk about titans later, but I’d like to focus on the matter at hand.” She tried to keep it curt and professional.

Mike grunted, sniffing the air. “That abnormal is closing in. I’d say it’s almost caught up with Levi’s squad.”

“Mike, Hange, help set up the artillery,” Erwin hadn’t even started breaking a sweat. Merely continued riding. “Faye, tack up the horses and meet me up top.”

It was the first time Faye had actually witnessed Erwin use the ODM gear. He was almost as graceful as Levi on it, flying through the air with ease from branch to branch. It was just a second where the light filtered in through the leaves, bathing The Commander’s figure in a golden halo.

It reminded Faye of a vague memory of a cathedral in Marley that she had visited with her parents and twin. She didn’t remember much of it, just an icon she’d glanced at. But, she swore, Erwin looked near identical in the pose, the way the light stroked his face, and the determined glint in his eyes.

It was only for a second, though, and she forced herself to turn away from the scene, gathering the reins of her commander’s horse before she led it further into the forest.

There was a loud, shrill ringing that sliced through the air, piercing Faye’s eardrums. The horses faltered in their steps, neighing in discomfort. “Come on, Chicken,” her hand patted the horse's neck reassuringly, “Let’s get you off the trails.” She only led them a few trees away, carefully tying them to a nearby branch. Mindlessly, Faye reached a hand into one of the packs on her horse, intending to grab her medical bag, only to snatch her arm back as though she’d been burned. Then, slowly, she flipped the top open and peered inside.

“When’d you slip in?” Faye quietly inquired, pulling the brown cat out gently. “You were supposed to stay at the castle, Beef.” The cat peered at Faye innocently. “Whatever, can’t just leave you here now, so you might as well come with me.” She set the cat into her hood before she grabbed her medical bag and set off into the trees.

“Didn’t realize all of this fit into the wagons,” Faye mumbled, planting herself right next to her commander. Artillery and cannons were neatly lined against the treeline, tucked out of sight from most of the pathways. “You think this will hold her?”

“I’ve planned for nearly every circ*mstance,” Erwin assured, planting a firm hand on Faye’s shoulder. “I’ll be pleased if they exceed my expectations.”

“I’m surprised you planned for them being another titan shifter.”

“Weren’t you the one who said it was safe to assume Eren wasn’t the only titan shifter?” The Commander wore an ironic tilt on his lips. He hadn’t removed his hand from her shoulder, though he bristled when a tiny paw darted out from Faye’s hood, attempting to claw his fingers.

“Sorry,” The medic sheepishly scratched her cheek, “Found a stowaway in my bags and figured he might as well stay for the ride.” She watched him slowly move, pulling the hood back to inspect the tiny creature nestled away. “His name is Beef.”

“Beef,” Erwin mused. “Is he an official member of your squad?”

“He’s replacing Al’ as my second in command,” Faye grinned, easing into herself for the first time in a week and a half. “I’m going to get him a custom uniform.”

“You’ll make the cat wear the uniform, but you won’t?”

Distant thuds filled the forest, snapping the two out of their banter.

“Ready the artillery,” Erwin barked, stepping back into his position as commander. He was scanning the forest floor, watching his soldiers intently. The thumps were getting closer at an astonishing pace, nearly shaking the ground with each step the titan took.

She could hear the horses galloping, though the sound was distant and drowned out by the titan tailing Levi’s squad. She narrowed her eyes when they came into view, zipping down the pathway, and the second they cleared the cannons, Erwin had stepped forward, shouting “Fire!”

The cannons fired, catapulting hundreds of wires through the air, which stabbed straight through the titan’s exposed muscles and skin. The steel glinted in the patches of sunlight, angling as the Female Titan’s eyes widened at having fallen for their trap.

“Look at how she’s flexing,” Faye mumbled, eyes narrowing at the wires. “She’s testing her mobility. Definitely a human wrapped in titan skin.” She watched the titan’s lips curl back in frustration.

“She’s not putting up much of a fight,” Levi commented, shooting up to their branch with ease.

“That’s no reason to let our guard down,” Erwin reminded, both of his blades drawn. “Good work in leading her here; I’m more than a little impressed,” He acknowledged, prompting Faye to glance up at him with a frown. That was a blunt backhanded compliment.

“We couldn’t have without the rear contingent whose lives bought time,” Levi reminded somewhat hotly. “This belongs to them,” Faye observed the scene, picking it apart in her mind. It seemed like Commander Erwin had a habit of forgetting the scouts were humans, viewing them as expendable, while Levi was painfully aware of their mortality. “I don’t intend to ever forget that.”

Erwin hummed thoughtfully, dully inquiring, “Is that so?”

“Yes. Because of their sacrifices, we can expose whoever this really is,” He’d jutted his chin down to look down upon the titan. “Ten to one,” He noted, turning to curl his lips back in disgust before adding in quietly to himself, “They’re in there pissing themselves right about now.”

Faye noted the pressed facial expression she wore, watching the metaphorical cogs turn, rapidly trying to come up with a way out of the wired trap. ‘I wonder how old she is.’ it was a fleeting thought, but it echoed inside her skull.

“Not quite yet, Levi,” Erwin loured. “A little more insurance.” Faye watched the blond raise his right hand! “Second and third waves, fire,” He bellowed. It wasn’t very often The Commander belted out commands, but when he did, he made sure the entire parameter heard him. “All reserves!”

Erwin called for another round of shots before the medic watched Levi and Mike barrel toward the titan. They were synchronized, swinging their blades down before the metal snapped on impact due to the titan's crystalized hands. Mike swung up to a nearby branch, shaking his head solemnly at his commander.

The Commander summoned another scout with a simple wave. “Prepare an artillery round; I want her hands blown off,” He didn’t miss a beat, ruthlessly watching the trapped titan.

“With all due respect, Commander,” The lackey addressed. “There’s a risk if we use the cannons. The hands will get blown off, but whatever’s beneath them will too, Sir,” He pointed out adeptly.

“A fine point, soldier.” Erwin agreed, “Which is why you’ll aim carefully and sever them at the wrists. On my signal, I want an all-out Salvo,” Erwin left no room for arguments while the soldier quickly retreated to the ground, relaying Erwin’s orders.

Faye bristled at the cold tone. She'd never heard her commander use that intonation, and she would never have suspected he'd be so brutal. It was a side to him she couldn't recognize. Erwin had always made it a point to be the perfect gentleman around her, but now, watching him stand before someone he regarded as his enemy... What would happen when she told him the truth about herself? Would she fall victim to the same cutthroat attitude? Would he order her death just like the Female Titan?

“Erwin,” The doctor quietly addressed. “That’s a human in there.” Her commander’s cold eyes left her stony and tense.

“A human who killed off a decent percentage of our troops,” The blond reminded. “She’s lethal, and I’ll be damned if I have to endure any more nameless casualties.”

The doctor swallowed, nodding. As much as she hated to admit it, Erwin had a well-thought-out point. It wasn’t done out of malicious intent; it was done to ensure his soldiers would be protected. But still… ' That titan could have just as easily been me if I hadn’t turned myself in all those years ago."

Faye’s eyes trailed to Levi, who stood on the titan’s head, muttering down at it. She grimly noticed the deadset glare in Levi’s eyes while he stared down with an empty, bloodthirsty expression, eager to exact revenge for the rear contingent Erwin had seemingly disregarded.

A piercing, demonic wail sounded out, shaking the trees with force. The soldiers hurried to press their palms over their ears, seeking relief from the blisteringly loud shriek that cut through the air. Faye pursed her lips, the death throes of the Eldian Restorationists reverberating inside her head while the Female Titan screamed.

Mike hurriedly zoomed over to Erwin, “Titans are coming. I can smell them,” He informed, his composure taking a serious edge.

“From what direction-”

“From every direction,” Mike growled. “Fast. Dozens,”

Erwin glanced to his side, a surprised breath leaving his throat while thundering footsteps echoed within the forest.

“Faster on the artillery, gentlemen,” Erwin commanded, forcing himself to regain his collected attitude.

“Here they are. First wave’s closing in from the east and coming in fast,” Mike admonished, sweat dripping down his temple languidly.

“Wagon Defense Squad, intercept. Now,” Erwin called, only to falter when the titans ignored the soldiers and continued barrelling forwards. Faye grimly noticed that this was the first time she’d ever seen Erwin awestruck, and his reaction warned her to start panicking.

Levi stomped on the titan’s head, growling something Faye couldn’t quite make out before he shot forward, decimating four titans single-handedly without so much as breaking a sweat.

Erwin’s head tilted down, a strangled sound humming from within his throat while he watched a rogue titan leap forwards, its jaw unhinging while it wrapped its body around the Female Titan’s leg tugging at it to get a better bite. It hadn’t even glanced at the soldiers that were still on the ground. It was then that he realized dozens of titans had bulldozed their way forward, all aiming for the Female Titan.

“All hands, commence combat!” He called out, watching his soldiers begin leaping towards their potential death, “Defend the Female Titan at all costs!”

Faye wasted no time, her gear latching onto the nearest titan as she propelled herself down, readying her blades. She kept herself moving, from one titan to the next, copying the spiral Levi had taught her during their month at the castle. Once one titan had been dealt with, she raced to the next, slicing through the flesh and ignoring the steam that evaporated from her clothes. Her muscles were flexing, remembering the movements she'd been training to learn. The movements were repetitive, cut, move, slash, repeat. Cut, move, slash, repeat.

Then, her hook landed right in the palm of a waiting titan, and before it could yank on her line, Faye's hand swung down, severing the wire before she sent another up, narrowly avoiding another's teeth. She clenched her jaw when she glanced down at the severed wire. Her gear was screwed, and they hadn't brought any extras.

She swung the gun around, taking in a big breath. Gunshots rang out as she took aim and fired, rendering a few titans blind. That was the best she could do given the circ*mstances.

Six bullets later, Erwin was forced to eat his words, and shout out, “All hands, withdraw. Redeploy the formation. Return to Calaneth District!”

The Commander’s eyes remained downcast, glancing over at Faye and Levi, who’d only just arrived on his branch, still steaming. “We’ve been bested,” He admitted, somewhat ashamed.

“Don’t give me that crap,” Levi snapped, wiping off a piece of titan. “Not now. Not yet.”

Faye had only intended to send a glance over at Erwin when he’d began speaking, but her jaw slackened, and she couldn’t help but stare up at the sick, excited smile he was trying to force down. What kind of demented commander smiled at the revelation of being beaten?

“Think about it,” Erwin prompted. “The enemy was prepared to make sacrifices. Enormous ones. So committed to maintaining her secret, she would rather let herself be cannibalized than exposed.” He elucidated with a nauseating sense of satisfaction.

He was mental.

“That whole song and dance in the courtroom and this is what we’ve got to show for it,” Levi growled irritatedly. “We scurry back now with our tail between our legs, Eren’s right back in chains, and Faye is imprisoned under the suspicion of conspiring with her brother.”

“We’ll jump off that bridge when we come to it,” Erwin shrugged, completely downplaying the situation. “Right now, our only concern is getting back without sustaining further casualties,” his voice lowered before he quietly added, “However we can.”

“I’ll gather up my squad,” Levi had started to bend his knees, ready to take off, but Erwin cut in before he could.

“Not yet, Levi,” Erwin had turned his head to survey the damage, keeping his eyes trained forwards. “First, replenish your blades and your fuel.”

“I can deal with what I’ve got,” Levi assured. “We’re running against the clock as it is.” Faye watched a heartbeat pass where Levi’s curiosity bested him, and he questioned his Commander. “Why?”

“Because I said,” Erwin replied simply, subtly reminding his subordinate of his position. “That’s an order,” There was a tense moment where the two gained eye contact, some unspoken words traveling between the pair before Levi stiffly relented.

“Whatever you say, sir,” He voiced stoically, a distant expression forming while he looked away from the Commander. “I trust you implicitly.”

Faye glanced between the two in silent curiosity while her mind tried to unpeel the layers to the meaningful eye contact and far away looks before her cheeks burned, and she realized in horror that she was blushing.

Alexander had joked about it before, and Faye had always brushed it off. But…

Were Erwin and Levi together..?

It was a preposterous idea, but it made sense. The prolonged eye contact, the banter between the two, the fondness in Erwin’s eyes every time he looked at the short captain.

She used her good hook to move to a different branch, the movement lopsided and clumsy. She needed a moment away from Erwin. She’d probably go into a frenzy if she kept thinking about it.

“Anyone needing immediate medical attention,” She cupped her hands around her lips, yelling into the open air. “Up here! Form a line!”

“Faye,” Hange zipped up to her branch, nearly crashing into the captain she was eager to speak to. “The mouth-

“Take a seat,” Faye ordered the squad leader, hands already pillaging through her medical bag for a suture kit. “You should have some painkillers in your bag; I suggest you take one.”

“Faye,” Hange tried again, bouncing next to the doctor. “Your theory on the mouth, I tested it. You were right on the tissue being softer inside. I cut through their throat in a matter of seconds.”

“That explains the titan steam,” Faye clipped, jutting her chin to Hange's cloak. “Anything else?”

“It was an instant kill,” They supplied. “Maybe that’s the most effective way of dealing with them. Wouldn’t that be exciting?” Hange grinned, “And the last thing they would think before they die is that they’d be getting a tasty meal.”

“Too much of a risk to avoid their teeth,” Faye didn’t have the luxury of waiting for the pain medication to take effect, so she unscrewed the lid to some salve and gently smothered some onto the nasty looking burn the squad leader sported on their leg. "We can talk more about titans when we aren't surrounded by them."

“Is that a promise?”

“It’s a threat,” Faye corrected, “By the way, where are the rest of the soldiers who need help?"

"Treating one another," Hange grinned, watching Faye wrap their leg. "Most of them paid attention when you taught your first aid course, and Erwin explicitly ordered everyone not to bother you unless it was an emergency."

"So what the hell are you doing then?"

"Keeping you company?" Hange innocently tilted their head, trying to appear as though they had no clue how to slap some salve over a measly burn.

“Go help load the artillery,” Faye dismissed, clicking her tongue. She watched the squad leader go before she breathed a sigh of relief. Hange, despite being good-mannered throughout the expedition thus far, put Faye on edge. They were too curious a person - and they weren't patient like Erwin was.

“We’re moving out in two minutes,” Erwin informed, coming to stand next to the medic.

Her shoulders tensed while her spine stiffened, a blush tinting her cheeks red. Erwin and Levi, huh?

“Off the books,” Faye hesitantly started, eyes darting around the forest for any signs of stray soldiers listening in. “Are you seeing anyone?” She tried not to look conspicuous, easing her shoulders as she peered up at him and praying her blush receded or that the blond was too dense to notice it.

Erwin’s heart thrummed inside his chest so quick he could hear the blood rushing through his ears. What was she insinuating? Was that her way of coming onto him? Had Faye finally realized the flowers and tea were more than just part of their inside joke?

Faye found herself fighting a grin when she noticed the Commander’s cheeks had been tinted pink while he struggled to answer. His stunned silence had been enough of an indicator for her, but she waited patiently for him to reply nonetheless.

She watched in anticipation as Erwin’s eyes narrowed dangerously, staring at something high in the sky, and when Faye had followed his eyesight, the hair on the nape of her neck stood on edge. There, in the sky, was a green flare. Somebody was impersonating Commander Erwin.

Erwin had stepped back into himself while he took control of the situation, urging his men to hurry and depart within the next minute.

“Faye, I-”

Faye shook her head, sending a lighthearted smile up. “Don’t worry about it. Your silence was enough of an answer for me,” She assured, while the Commander shifted uncomfortably.

‘No. It wasn’t.’ Erwin grimly thought. “We’ll talk about this when we get to HQ; for now, we need to press forward and try to find the spy,” He leaped off the branch without so much as a backward glance.

*

Distant chatter filled a quaint tea shop near the edge of Calaneth District. It was rush hour, though the tables remained largely empty-most likely due to the subpar tea they served. Sunlight filtered through the window, bathing an older, balding man with his lanky, ginger-haired son in an orange glow.

Mr. Ral’s brows furrowed as he stared at his son. Alexander had been acting depressed the entire two hours they’d spent together, and truth be told, he was getting worried.

“Alex,” He hesitantly started, fiddling with his teacup. “You look...” Mr. Ral licked his lips, carefully annunciating, “Gloomy.” Yes. Gloomy didn’t sound too aggressive. “Did you want to talk about it?”

“I lost the cat,” Alexander was paling, the color draining from his face. “Faye asked me to do three things. Paperwork, have tea with you, and grab Beef.” He buried his face in his hands miserably. “And I lost the f*cking cat.”

“Cat?”

“Beef,” Alex supplied. “A cute little brown cat who Faye loved more than her life.” He’d tried; he really did. “I spent an hour calling for him, but he’s gone. How am I supposed to tell her?”

For a second, Mr. Ral empathized with his son. If he had to bring bad news back to Petra, he was sure he’d be just as torn up about it. But the second passed, and the father found himself going just as white as his son. He loved his daughter, but how did Alexander feel about Faye?

“You act like an old married couple,” Mr. Ral implied, leaning forward in his seat. “Is there something going on between the two of you?”

“God no,” Alexander’s nose wrinkled at the thought, disgust coursing through his veins. “She’s my best friend, dad. I don’t think I could deal with Faye if I were in love with her romantically.” In all the years he’d known Faye, he’d never once considered the possibility of entering into a relationship with her. She was too… Feminine.

“And she still has no...romantic prospects?” Mr. Ral inquired curiously.

“Not really.” Al’s mind drifted to Levi, who’d been acting awfully suspicious. Or maybe even Erwin, who made it a point to bring Faye flowers every time he saw her.

A disjointed heartbeat passed.

“And Captain Levi?” Mr. Ral’s palms were sweating, a strained frown on his lips.”How has he been with Petra?”

“He’s...Brief.” Alexander’s throat had gone dry. This wasn’t an argument he wanted to start today. “He doesn’t really like anyone, though, to be fair.” At least he was being honest. “The Captain just kind of glares at everyone until they leave him alone.”

“Does he do the same with Faye?”

“Not exactly,” Alex shrugged. “I think Captain Levi tolerates Faye more than he does anyone- oh for f*cks sake,” The boy glared down at his hands, mood souring upon realizing he should have just kept his big mouth shut.

“Tolerates?” Mr. Ral questioned expectantly. “Does he do that for Petra?”

“Yeah,” Alexander lied, voice raising a few octaves. “Captain Levi, he’s- he’s really… sh*t.” His mind was blanking. The only thing the boy could actually think of was the way the short captain scowled at everything. “He and Petra drink a lot of tea together.” Yeah. Tea. That would work. That was believable.

“You never could tell a lie, Alexander.” Mr. Ral clicked his tongue, shaking his head.

Nervous laughter filled the air as Al’ sucked in a deep breath, scratching his neck awkwardly. This was bad. He could tell by the way his father had narrowed his eyes at the boy, how tight his fists were clenched, the way his shoulders tensed. He was so far deep in a pile of sh*t, there was no escape.

“I think I should talk to Captain Levi about his relationship with my daughter.”

That was the absolute worst idea Alexander had ever heard.

“He’s not going to like that,” Al’ tried to say. “Captain Levi doesn’t really like talking. To anyone.”

“I think he could spare a few moments when he and Petra get back from the expedition,” Mr. Ral reasoned. “I’ve never spoken to Captain Levi before, so perhaps now is a good time to start.” His reasoning was understandable, though Alexander doubted he’d feel the same way after five minutes with Humanity’s Strongest.

“Dad, why don’t you talk to Faye about it?” Alex meekly suggested. “She’s on better terms with The Captain than everyone else. I think if you asked her, she would-”

“Hold your tongue, you insolent boy,” Mr. Ral ordered in a low, dangerous tone. “Why should I speak with the woman who, apparently, is the only person Captain Levi-who might I remind you, should have proposed to Petra months ago- gets along with?” It was a quiet rage, seething and boiling just below surface level. “She’s a whor*, Alexander. I don’t know why you hang around Faye if you can’t see yourself marrying her.”

“How did this conversation go from talking about Beef to you calling Faye a whor*?” His fists were trembling as he tried not to make a scene. “Do you have any idea what she’s done for our family? Half our income came from her. How could you consciously bad-mouth her like that? She put food on our table-”

“And now she’s put you in the Scouting Regiment,” Mr. Ral cut in. “You’ve never had a day of official training, and that woman is ready to put your life at risk.”

“My whole life, you’ve been nagging me to join the military, and now that I have, you’re unhappy?” Al’ incredulously questioned. “What the hell, dad? It’s like the only person in our family you respect is Petra.”

“Well, I would respect your mother, but Faye went and killed-”

“Don’t.” The lanky boy bitterly cut in. “That’s my captain you’re talking about. She’s outside the walls right now, saving people’s lives while she risks her own.” Words couldn’t even describe the disgust and shame Alexander held for his father. “And all you want to do is call her a whor*?”

“Lest I remind you, she’s only in the regiment because she was found guilty of murdering thousands of lives,” Mr. Ral hissed, his hands balled into fists as his face had started to redden.

“Lest I remind you ,” Al’ snarkily repeated, “That she’s also saved thousands of lives. Our lives.”

“She’s a criminal,” Mr. Ral vehemently reminded.

“So am I,” Alexander forced a breath of air into his lungs. "I knew what she was doing, and I turned a blind eye. I'm just as guilty as Faye..”

“You don’t think it’s bizarre that a woman of her age isn’t married yet?” Mr. Ral raised a defiant brow. “She’s pushing thirty, and still no romantic prospects? Why do you think that is?” It was rhetorical, and when Alexander opened his lips to answer, Mr. Ral cut him off. “Because she’s sleeping around. Once a prostitute, always a prostitute.”

“You know what,” Al pushed himself away from the table, “Talk to Captain Levi yourself and see how well that goes. I’m done with this conversation.”

“I will not be spoken to like this by my son,” Mr. Ral fumed, leaping to his feet as he latched onto his son’s arm, digging his nails in. “I am your father, and I demand respect-”

“You’re an old man who can’t be bothered to love his own son,” He corrected, ripping his father’s hand off. “I lost my mother last month, and where were you? Huh? With Petra, like always. And at Uncle John’s funeral? You couldn’t even look at me.” Alexander watched the way Mr. Ral’s eyes narrowed, though he stood unmoved by the silent fury. “You’ll have my respect when you start treating me like your son.”

“Petra wasn’t crying like an inconsolable child,” Mr. Ral sneered. “You’re a man. You shouldn’t be so prone to your emotions, Alexander.”

“Oh my walls. Oh my f*cking walls, are you hearing yourself right now?” Al’s eyes couldn’t get any wider. “You sound insane.” A sarcastic laugh left his lips, filling the open air. “You’re- sh*t. What was the word Faye used? Gaslighting? You’re gaslighting me.”

“Gaslighting?” Mr. Ral snapped. “I’ll show you gaslighting -”

The door slammed open, a young man excitedly rushing in with a grin.

“Daddy,” He cried, moving to bounce from foot to foot at the counter. “The Scouts are on their way back. Can I go see them? Please?”

“I gotta go see Faye,” Alexander muttered out, shoving a hand in his pocket and slamming down a few coins. “Tell her I lost the f*cking cat.” He couldn’t bring himself to look at his father; the man had done enough damage for the day.

Apparently, Mr. Ral hadn’t gotten the hint, and he scurried to keep up with his son, slinking out the door behind the lanky boy.

“And if Faye Jaeger is dead?”

Alexander froze mid-step, sucking in a deep, shuddering breath. He’d been doing his damndest not to imagine the possibility of his best friend losing her life, and his father had just undone all the effort he’d put in.

“She promised she’d make it back alive.”

“But what if she doesn’t?” Mr. Ral took another step closer to his son, easily meeting his eye with burning determination. “Will you settle down and find a wife? Give me some grandchildren? Stop this foolishness of pining after a whor*?”

Alexander's composure dropped, and he spun on his heel to face his father, looking him dead in the eye.

“I like men,” Alexander whispered, muscles tensing while Mr. Ral stiffened. “I’m not pining after Faye. She’s got the wrong parts, and-” The boy must have learned something from Mikasa’s training because the second Mr. Ral’s hand whipped out, intending to slap his son, Alexander caught his wrist. “Abuse? You’d really hit your own son for telling the truth?”

“You’re no son of mine,” Mr. Ral snarled. “ My Alexander would never stoop so low-”

“Send him my regards,” Alexander sharply interjected, dropping Mr. Ral’s hand. He was done with the conversation, regardless of whether or not his father felt the same.

Chapter 18: 14. Return to the Walls

Chapter Text

Erwin had only needed to give Faye a nod, and that was all it took for her to go flying through the trees with her broken gear. Her movements were clumsy and lopsided-but manageable. One hook was all she needed to maneuver through the trees, clamping onto one branch at a time.

“Do you think she’s caught up with Eren?” Faye hollered, swinging next to Levi.

“What happened to your gear?” He ignored her question, zeroing in on Faye’s crooked stance.

“Doesn’t matter,” The doctor shrugged. “I can deal with what I’ve got. Do you think she’s caught up with Eren?” Faye repeated, keeping pace with Levi. She frowned when he didn’t say anything, but she took his silence as an answer regardless.

A piercing wail shook the trees, thrumming through the air with enough force to knock the wind out of someone. It sounded animalistic and just as demonic as the throe the Female Titan shrieked earlier.

Faye rounded the tree with Levi, turning to follow the sound. It was Eren; there was no other explanation. And if Eren had assumed titan form, well, she couldn’t conclude that meant anything good. More likely than not, he was in serious danger. Not to mention that Faye’s little brother had the absolute worst impulsive attitude she had ever witnessed, which could only lead to disaster.

“Don’t lose your head,” Levi warned. “I get that he’s your brother, but we can’t afford to make rash decisions.”

“Don’t insult me,” Faye cautioned. “I might not do things the conventional way, but I do weigh my options and their outcomes before I act.”

“And that time Eren transformed?”

“He’s supposed to be Humanity’s Saviour, isn’t he?” She raised a brow, challenging Levi. “It would have been a shame if he died before he got to retake Wall Maria, wouldn’t you say?"

“You’re acting different,” Levi grumbled. He’d been on edge since they left the safety of the walls, and it didn’t help that Faye had been unusually stern. It wasn’t a side to her he had expected to witness. At least, not for such a long period of time.

“Next thing you’re going to tell me is that I’m acting like I’ve lived through a war,” Faye clipped.

“Stop screwing around. The only war we’ve lived through has been against the sh*tty titans.” Levi scoffed, dismissing his comrade’s words, ignorant of just how true they were.

The first body Faye and Levi had encountered was Gunther. He hung lifelessly from a few wires, blood dripping down his body from a lethal gash straight across his torso. He stayed unblinking, mouth just slightly open.

“Keep moving,” Levi quietly ordered. “No point in worrying about someone who’s already dead.”

The pair reached the center of the clearing, taking a fleeting moment to survey the damage. Eld laid on the ground. There was no sign of his lower half, and by the looks of it, he was already turning cold. His lips had started to go blue, and his eyes had shut.

Oluo’s spine was bent, his spinal cord snapped clean in half. Splinters and dirt had collected just beneath the skin in a gruesome display, likely from being launched into a tree.

The eldest Ral sibling laid at the base of a tree, her head tilted back to stare at the sky. The way she had been positioned looked almost… reverent. As if her last thought had been a prayer that she hoped would reach the heavens. Her legs had been crushed, the blood having exploded in a macabre fashion, leaving bits and pieces of leftover skin, tendons, and muscles hanging off the bone. Her eyes remained unblinking, in a lifeless, glassy fashion, with blood smeared around the side of her head and hair.

Faye stared at all of them in horror. They were all dead. The injuries were too severe, and they’d already lost too much blood. There was no coming back to life for any of them, not even if Faye had gotten there in time.

Levi’s voice ripped Faye from her thoughts, “They’re just up ahead by the sounds of it.”

It was only a minute later the Female Titan came into view, but Faye’s heart dropped.

“Levi,” The medic called. “Mikasa is up there, and she’s not thinking straight. You need to stop her before she does something stupid, please.” She was having a hard time remembering to breathe, and she nearly missed the branch she was aiming for with the gear.

The grumpy captain said nothing, but he heeded Faye’s request, moving forward just as Mikasa launched herself forward and tucking the teenager under his arm.

“We’ll stay back for now,” Levi ordered, narrowing his eyes at the bared teeth Mikasa wore. She was acting like a loose cannon, and he would never have expected the 104 Training Corps number one cadet to act so rashly. “Maintain current distance.”

The medic watched Levi drop Mikasa, the teenager’s lines pulling her forward between the two captains.

“Looks like she’s slowing down,” Faye commented. “The fight with Eren must have worn her out.”

“Faye, did you see the neck back there?” Levi’s lips pressed thin, a grim look shadowing over his features. “It looked like she may have bitten the entire nape off.” He let a heartbeat pass, trying to gauge the doctor’s feelings. “It’s unlikely Eren survived.”

“He’s still alive in there,” Mikasa insisted, her scarf fluttering in the wind while she pressed forward, eyes glued on the Female Titan. “This titan is different; it acts with purpose. If she wanted Eren dead, she could’ve simply crushed him. No, she needs him for something.” The teenager’s mind was whirling, working at a breakneck pace. “But she also needs her hands to fight, so she’s been holding him on her tongue.”

“It’s possible she just wanted to savor her quarry. In which case, it’s likely he’s already been swallowed.” Levi had no problem shooting Mikasa’s theory down with his own. He wasn’t saying it out of maliciousness, but he needed to prepare the teenager for the very real possibility, so he added on, “If so, he’s dead.”

“He’s alive!”

“Someone’s optimistic.” Levi duly noted, oblivious to the withering glare he was receiving from Faye.

“If you had just done your damn job and protected him like you were supposed to, we wouldn’t be having this conversation,” Mikasa snapped, clearly having reached the limits of her patience.

“Oh, I see now,” Levi turned, still flying through the air to face the teenager with a blank look. “The ‘Childhood Friend,’ right? Suddenly it’s all making sense.”

“Levi,” Faye’s tone sounded hard and unimpressed. “Stop patronizing Mikasa. She’s worried enough as is. Either give her an order or drop the condescending asshole act.” She hadn’t raised her voice, but there was more than enough level and snappiness to it to get her point across. The medic zeroed in on the small curve the teenager's lips took, “And you. You need to tone down the teenage angst. We’re all worried about Eren, but that doesn’t give you the right to act like an idiot. You’re acting recklessly, and you’re wrongfully taking your anger out on Levi.”

“Faye-” Mikasa's eyes had gone wide, anger welling in her bones.“Levi, what’s the plan?” The doctor ignored the girl, focusing on the other captain. He had more experience with titans, and therefore he probably had a better idea of what to do given the unusual circ*mstances.

“Right,” Levi nodded, a twinge of guilt filling his bones. “For the sake of argument, let’s narrow our goals.” Willingly, he put back the mask of indifference. Faye was right, he wasn’t familiar with the teenager, and he was likely making an ass out of himself. “First, we forget about taking her down-”

“No way.” Mikasa cut him off. “She’s killed too many of our people for that. She’s dead.”

“Mikasa,” Faye’s voice held no amusem*nt or fondness. “We’re not trained or equipped to deal with her ability to crystalize and harden her skin. We’re only going to hurt or kill ourselves in the process.”

“We’ll act on your assumption that Eren is alive,” Levi decided. “And focus only on freeing him before she exits the forest. I’ll handle the cutting, you find a way to distract her, and Faye will grab Eren.”

The three separated, Mikasa, sending a bout of gas to propel herself forward, easily gaining the Female Titan’s attention. The teenager watched the titan glance backward, catching sight of Levi before her eyes narrowed, and the giant humanoid’s arm swung back, intending to punch Humanity’s Strongest.

Levi’s hooks grappled into the titan's skin, and before Mikasa could even blink, he moved forward, spiraling along her arm faster than the titan could process. He took out her eyes, next, and then it was anyone’s guess as to where his next cut ended up. The titan’s back hit a tree, and her legs collapsed out from under her.

Faye watched the encounter with narrowed eyes, waiting for her chance to leap forward from her spot among the trees. Levi was quick, faster than the titan could process, which played to their advantages. She watched the titan’s hand fall from its nape, but then, her heart stopped.

Mikasa had seen the same opening Faye had, but she’d neglected to notice the hand that was aiming to squash the teenager like a bug.

Faye’s hands moved on instinct, the rifle getting pulled against her chest, the safety being flicked up, and she fired two bullets within the span of a couple seconds, effectively taking the titan’s eyesight out for the second time in three minutes. It wasn’t enough though, the hand was still zooming through the air, and if something weren’t done, Mikasa would be flattened.

“Don’t do it!” Levi shouted, pushing Mikasa out of the way. He landed on the hand with a grunt, his ankle giving out beneath him and landing painfully.

Faye was already on the move, shooting her lines forward as Levi’s blade dragged across the titan’s mouth, forcing it to drop open. Eren laid on the tongue, encased in slime. She was in and out of the mouth, grabbing onto Eren before Faye’s hook landed in a tree, and Levi joined her on the branch, kneeling with an arm out.

Faye handed over her baby brother, frowning at Mikasa. “He’s fine. Just covered in saliva. You can clean it off of him when we get to safety.” She moved closer to Levi, fingers pressing against the boy's wrist to take his pulse.

“What’d I tell you about trying to take her down?” Levi questioned, his ankle throbbing inside his boot. “Now come on. We’ve got Eren, that means our work here is done.” He shifted his gaze back at the titan, who hadn’t moved from the base of the tree. “Don’t screw this up by making it personal, you understand? We all get that you love him, but try not to act crazy.”

“Levi is right,” Faye conceded, releasing Eren’s wrist. “That was stupid of you. You’re in the military now, and there isn’t any room for you to ignore orders. You should know better.”

“I-I was just-” Mikasa stiffened, watching Levi turn with Eren secured in his arm before he leaped.

“Mikasa,” Faye sighed, expression softening. “I’m not trying to be hard on you, but I’m not exaggerating when I say that you almost gave me a heart attack. I saw that titan’s hand come up, and if Levi wasn’t there, I-” She cut herself off with a grunt when Mikasa pounced forward, hugging Faye.

“I hate him,” Mikasa glowered, “He assaulted Eren, and-”

“He also just saved your life, as well as Eren’s,” Faye didn’t miss a beat in reminding the teenager. “Levi was trying to lighten the mood back there because he noticed how tense you were. He didn’t say any of that to get under your skin; he was saying it to help loosen you up.”

“By ridiculing me?”

“His entire sense of humor verges on literal sh*t jokes,” Faye deadpanned. “Besides, he just found out his entire squad was killed by her, so cut him some slack.”

“Oi!” Levi hollered from a few trees away, “You two going to gossip like a bunch of ten-year-olds, or are we going to get a move on?”

Mikasa clenched her jaw, but she moved off of Faye and took off down the trees to follow Captain Levi, with Faye moving just behind her.

Levi’s eyes caught on something behind Faye, his eyes widening. Then, when Faye looked back, her breath got lodged in her throat.

There, behind the trio, sat the Female Titan, crying.

‘That would have been me if I hadn’t left Marley…’

It felt like an eternity that the three traveled in deafening silence, though it was closer to ten minutes. When they finally emerged from the forest, Levi frowned. There were at least a couple dozen more bodies laid on the ground being covered with spare linens. How many corpses hadn’t been retrieved, though? The number of bodies seemed low, and for a split second, the captain wracked his mind, trying to remember how many soldiers he watched get torn to shreds back in the forest.

Two? Maybe three?

The numbers didn’t quite seem right to him though; they should have been a lot higher.

Faye got to work the second Levi laid Eren down on a cart. Mikasa’s cloak came off, and the medic folded it, using it as a makeshift pillow for her brother. “Start cleaning the saliva off,” Faye ordered. Her fingers brushed her brother’s hair aside, inspecting the cut spanning over his hairline, which, unfortunately, hadn’t started steaming or regenerating.

Faye’s head was starting to throb, the stress manifesting in the pulsating ache. The medic worked deftly, bandaging her brother in silence and checking for any other injuries. She kept her hands busy, hyper-focusing on making sure the gauze wasn’t too tight.

“Do you need another hug?” Faye quietly questioned, finishing the neat knot on the bandages. She wasn’t asking for Mikasa’s sake; it was more selfish than that. Her eyes met the slight quiver in Mikasa’s idle hands, and she couldn’t help the heavy sigh that pushed from the deepest puts in her stomach.

“I’m not a kid anymore, I’m-”

“Fifteen, I know, I know,” Faye rolled her eyes, leaning against the cart. “Eren gave me the same lecture a few weeks ago, so spare me the arguments. Sheesh.” She let a heartbeat pass, straightening her shoulders. “But on a serious note, you look like you’re shaken up, and I can’t remember the last time I saw you so troubled.”

Mikasa stared at Faye, weighing her words with decisive precision. “Eren almost died.”

“You’re going to have to give me a little bit more to go on,” The medic prompted. “I’m beside your head, not in it.”

“I- The titan, she was carrying Eren in her mouth,” The words came out in a monotonous strain. “Captain Levi didn’t seem all that optimistic about his survival.” Mikasa watched Faye nod in understanding, “He specifically told me not to worry about killing her, and I- I disobeyed. Her nape was open, and-” Mikasa bit back a growl, “He saved me. I would have been dead if Captain Levi hadn’t stepped in.”

“You’re not indebted to him,” Faye murmured. “Buy Levi some tea, and he’ll call it even.”

“You don’t even look like you’re worried about Eren,” Mikasa fired. “He was almost kidnapped-killed- and you look like the only thing on your mind is taking a nap.”

“It’s been a long day,” She dryly supplied. “I’m worried about him too, but there’s not much I can do until Eren wakes up. Right now, I’m just grateful that he’s in stable condition, and you and Armin are safe.”

The teenager blinked, shoulders slumping. “You’re right. I don’t know why I keep questioning my superiors.”

“As someone in the same boat,” Sympathy was broiling inside of Faye’s guts. It might have been nearly two decades since she had actually been required to report to commanding officers, but she remembered it all with blistering accuracy. “Questioning orders and superiors is fine. But before you do, you better figure out their motives before you object or disobey.” The doctor let the words sit in the air, marinating in Mikasa’s head. “When Levi told you not to worry about killing the titan, it was because he recognized just how deadly she was. He was fine putting himself in danger, which was why he took over slicing and dicing it and put you on distraction duty. Despite teasing you, he wasn’t willing to lose you, which he proved when he pushed you out of the way and hurt his leg.”

“Captain Levi hurt his leg?” Mikasa’s eyes snapped to meet Faye’s, guilt welling in the pit of her stomach.

“I’m going to go check on it,” The medic assured. “But I think that when your nerves calm down, you should try to talk to him.” She watched the teenager’s lips open with the intention of objecting, but Faye spoke up again, “Be honest with him, and tell Levi why you didn’t appreciate his commentary. The worst he’ll do is tell you your taste in men is sh*tty.”

“Fine.”

The brunette let out a heavy sigh, “Are you staying with him, or do you want me to?” She already knew the answer, but it didn’t hurt to double-check.

“I’ll do it,” Mikasa promised.

It went against every sibling instinct in her body, but Faye nodded, pushing past the trepidation.

Mikasa was still just a kid, and Eren had become her lifeline, so it made sense the teenager wanted to stay near him. Not to mention that he’d nearly been kidnapped, which only added to Mikasa’s anxiety.

“Knock yourself out,” Faye shrugged. “Cover him up and make sure he stays warm. Send for me when he wakes up, please.” She didn’t wait for the girl to answer before she spun on her heel, marching forward.

Jean spotted Faye before Armin did, sending up a grim wave, beckoning the medic over.

“Captain Faye,” He dipped his head in acknowledgment before he saluted. “Do you mind looking over Armin? He has a pretty nasty-looking cut on his head.”

Armin stiffened, clenching his teeth together. If he were going to tell a superior about his theory, it would be Faye. The woman had proven time and time again to be trustworthy - especially during their time together before he joined the training corps.

“Come on,” Faye patted the edge of the wagon, jutting her chin at it. “Take a seat.” The blond teenager was already taller than Faye, and if he stayed standing, she’d have no hope of inspecting the damage done to his head.

“Captain Faye,” Armin hesitantly started, obeying her request. He stayed still, allowing the medic to peel away the gauze Reiner had wrapped around his head. “I uh- can I talk to you?”

“Go ahead,” Faye’s hands moved, gently brushing his hair out of the way to assess the wound. It looked a lot worse than Jean had implied. Blood had caked over on his forehead, clumping together in his hair. It wasn’t just a simple cut, either. It looked like Armin had taken a near nose-dive and scraped his head against the ground.

“Well, earlier, I encountered the Female Titan with-”

“Armin,” Faye’s hand dug around inside her medical bag, pulling out some disinfectant. “We’re a little pressed for time here. If you could just cut to the chase, that would be lovely.” She hadn’t said it offensively, and the short nod the boy gave told her he understood.

“I think I know who the Female Titan is.”

Jean’s eyes nearly bulged as he spun around to stare open-mouthed at his friend, crying out an incredulous, “What?!”

Armin had expected Faye to pause or drop the disinfectant, but she was completely unfazed, pouring the isopropyl alcohol overtop his head.

“That’s a pretty bold claim,” She moved a clean cloth to catch the disinfectant that dribbled down his forehead, effectively saving Armin’s eyes. “Do you have any proof?”

“It’s pretty weak,” He bit down a hiss of pain, fisting his hands. “Most of it is circ*mstantial.”

“Armin,” Jean took a step closer, shock written all over his features. “What are you saying?”

“I’ll explain it later,” Armin promised, feeling the cooling properties of the salve Faye had spread overtop the injury.

“Listen, both of you,” The Captain ordered. “Keep this between the three of us until we get back in the walls. I don’t care how much you trust your friends; it’s not safe .” She annunciated, narrowing her eyes at the pair of teenagers. “Knock on Erwin’s door, and explain your reasoning to him.”

“You’re not going to hear me out?” Armin sputtered, his hands darting out to clutch onto Faye’s forearm. “Why not?”

“I’m not the one you need to convince.” It was a simple answer, and Armin released her arm, slinking back to lean against the backboard of the wagon. “Talk to Erwin, and be honest. He’s not scary, and he’ll listen.” She was already rebandaging his head.

“How do you know we can trust him?” It was Jean who spoke, crossing his arms.

“The same way you know you can trust me,” She shrugged. “Keep your head away from any hard surfaces, and remember what I told you about running your mouth to anyone else.”

Armin saluted, nodding while Jean did the same. Faye spun on her heel, adjusting her medical bag on his shoulder as she stalked forward. The soldiers all seemed busy tallying the bodies. None of them smiled, and many the younger ones looked like they were going to be sick.

“Faye,” Erwin’s hand shot out among the sea of green cloaks, gently grasping onto her wrist. “A moment, if you’d please.” He patiently waited for the medic to nod before his hand slid down, entwining his fingers with hers as he led her away from all the carnage. It wasn’t exactly a sight he enjoyed seeing, so he couldn’t imagine how gut-wrenching it felt for Faye - a doctor who’d sworn to save as many lives as possible.

“How are you fairing?” The Commander set Faye down on a rock near the base of a tree. He kneeled on the ground, searching her eyes.

“Went better than expected.” There were fewer bodies than she’d prepared herself for, and from the brief, once-over of the scouts she’d done when she reached the field earlier, most of them had treated their own wounds decently.

“You look-”

“Yeah,” Faye cut him off. “I know.” The woman didn’t need a mirror to know she looked dead—the shell of her former self, a body operating with no soul. For the time being, she was devoid of emotions, numb to the numerous casualties she’d been witness to. It was too much to think about while still in titan territory, and if Faye were being honest, she didn’t have the energy. She couldn’t bring herself to look Erwin in the eyes, so she settled for staring glumly down at her hands. “It’ll dissipate after I take a shower. It always does.”

“Can I do anything for you?” Erwin’s nerves were steeled. He couldn’t bring down the mask of cold indifference, not even for the medic. His lips had been pulled into a thin line, and his voice was steady, “Water, a military ration?”

There was a long, contemplative silence. Faye’s eyes narrowed down at her hands, flexing her fingers. Slowly, her eyes trailed up, meeting Erwin’s. He looked worse for wear, the bags under his eyes were deep, and his hair had been tousled, likely from having run a hand through it in frustration. His eyes had darkened considerably, a stark contrast the medic had trouble navigating.

“Earlier, when we were still in the forest,” Faye’s brows furrowed, playing with the hem of her shirt while she stared at her commander. “You were ruthless.” The hard glint in his eyes flashed in her mind. “I hardly recognize you.”

“Present tense?” He questioned.

“Yeah. You were going to comment on my mental health, but I think the one we need to worry about is you.” It was easier to just be blunt, especially after the nightmarish expedition. “The more you hold back on your emotions, the worse it’s going to be when they all spill over.” She had learned from personal experience - a habit she was still struggling to rectify.

“The title of Commander isn’t an easy job,” He sighed. The conversation was tiring him out. Faye was hitting every emotional nail possible, and Erwin wasn’t sure if he was glad someone understood or if he was wary she could read him so easily despite his stony expression. “The Scouts need a leader who’s willing to do what’s necessary for humanity's sake. For freedom’s sake.”

“And how would you define freedom?” Faye inquired. “Are you the type who thinks freedom lies beyond the walls, just out of reach?” She was digging into Erwin’s mind; she could see it in the way he bristled at her words.

“I’d like to find freedom in the secret to titans,” He kept himself honest but guarded. “Eren, and now the Female Titan, they leave much to be discovered. Knowledge you seem to keep tucked away inside your head.”

“Ignorance is bliss,” Faye mumbled. “This whole situation is something I thought I’d run far enough away from. The killing, the bloodshed, the constant death.” The entire day had been a constant reminder of the doctor’s time in the Warrior Program, the horrors she’d faced in the trenches. The memories haunted her, picking at her mind like vultures to a body laid out in the sun. “Levi said he understood what it was to take a life, but I think you and I are more alike than anyone else realizes.”

“Perhaps it’s a bitter pill for many to swallow,” Erwin sighed in resignation, a hand sweeping through his hair as he got to his feet, towering over the medic, who shrank in his shadow. “You’ve had a long day; you should rest when we return to the walls.”

“What about Eren?” Faye sucked in a breath. “The government is going to want him dead. He proved useless on this expedition, and neither the government nor the citizens are going to stand for having a titan shifter living in the walls when he can’t even control his ability yet.” Her nerves had already been rattled, but the thought of Eren dying a pointless death- she shuddered. The boy would never forgive himself if he failed to make a difference in the world.

“Our main priority is making it back to the walls without sustaining any more casualties,” The blond reminded. “We can worry about Eren’s life when we aren’t in immediate danger. Besides, Mitras is a day and a half’s ride away; we’ll have time to plan during the journey.”

“Before you go,” Faye hadn’t made a move to stand, keeping herself seated on the rock as she looked up at Erwin. “Can you step out of your commander role for a minute? I’m having a hell of a day, and I could really use a friend for twenty seconds.” Somehow, Faye managed a weak smile.

Erwin’s posture softened, nodding, “What is it?”

“You look like you need a hug as much as I do,” She stated. “Do you mind?”

Erwin’s head tilted, his shoulders easing as he brought his hands out, welcoming the brunette into his arms and pulling her against his chest. He leaned down, resting his chin on her head. Mike hadn’t been lying when he said Faye smelled like mint and disinfectant, and inwardly, Erwin prayed the smell would cling to his memory for as long as he lived. The blond hadn’t registered how much he missed the physical contact a hug offered; it wasn’t sexual, but he reveled in how the doctor felt cradled to his chest. He couldn’t help it when his eyes fluttered shut, savoring the moment. Truly, he hadn’t realized how badly he needed this gesture until now.

For a split second, he wondered if that was what freedom felt like.

“You smell expensive,” Faye mumbled against his shirt.

“Expensive?” Erwin hummed, chest vibrating against the medic.

“Fancy cologne,” She supplied, relaxing the longer she stayed tucked away in her commander’s arms. “I’d wager it’s from Mitras.”

“It was a gift from Levi.”

Faye nodded, having figured as much. They were, after all, apparently an item. At least, Faye thought they were.

He was a living furnace, the body heat penetrating through his jacket and warming the brunette. A lump had formed in her throat, warning her not to try and speak for fear of the words cracking. Erwin had no clue just how much the simple action of wrapping his arms around Faye had decreased her stress. It truly was a godsend.

“Alright,” The medic shuddered in a heavy breath, bracing herself for when Erwin released her. “You’ve got some troops to order around.”

The cold air hit her like a ton of bricks, chilling Faye right down to the bone when her commander took a step backward.

“Commander Smith, Captain Faye,” A soldier had come bounding up the hill just in the nick of time, oblivious to the moment he’d nearly walked in on. A few others trailed behind him, following his lead. “Status report on the corpses.” He saluted, handing a clipboard for Erwin to look over. “We’re almost done, sir. We estimate about five to be unrecoverable.”

Five. Five humans whose bodies couldn’t be brought back to their families.

“Not even an arm or a leg?” Erwin’s tone was grim, eyes downcast. That was five men he’d sent to die.

“Sadly, the titans didn’t leave much behind,” The soldier let out. “And, honestly, sir, I think it would be best for the families if we didn’t bring back what little there is.”

The words stung, but he was probably right. Faye couldn’t imagine receiving Eren’s leg or arm after being notified of his death; she’d probably spend hours staring at it, imagining the teeth that had clenched down around the limb with enough force to snap it off.

“We’ll put them down as missing,” Erwin decided.

“Also, sir, our spotters report several titans have emerged from the forest.” The soldier notified. “Fortunately, none yet seem to be headed in our direction.”

“We move out immediately. Inform the squads,” The Commander handed back the clipboard, motioning for Faye to follow, though the pair were interrupted by yet another soldier.

“No! I refuse! It’s inhumane!” He vehemently protested. “We can’t just leave them out here. He was there! I saw Ivan’s body; he was right in front of us!”

“And if you didn’t notice, there were titans nearby,” Another snapped. “Go back, and we could wind up dead ourselves.”

“So?” The one who had spoken out of turn snipped. “If they attack, we’ll fight. That’s what we do, right?”

“Ivan and me,” The one next to him voiced, “We grew up in the same town together. His parents were like family to me.” He was shaking like a leaf, likely due to his incredulous anger. “I can’t face them again if we leave him!”

“Stop shrieking,” Levi admonished, having stepped out from behind a large rock. “If you’ve already confirmed his death, then there’s nothing more to do.” He looked just as exhausted as Faye felt, rivaling the depressed frown Erwin wore with his own. “Whether we have his body or not makes no difference now. He’s still just as dead either way.”

“As straightforward as Levi was, he’s right,” Faye stepped forward, lips thinned. “The most you can do for his family now is lend an ear and mourn with them. You’ll be putting yourselves at risk if you go back for the corpse. I think we’ve had enough casualties to last today, don’t you?”

“Ivan and the others will be listed as missing in action,” Erwin’s tone gave no room for arguments, “That’s my decision, and it’s final . Now let it go.” He started forward again, moving away from the soldiers who cursed him.

Faye’s brows furrowed, and she gave a worried glance back at Levi, who glared at the ground as he followed. Again, Erwin had ordered his soldiers in a tone Faye had never been privy to from The Commander, and inwardly, she wondered about just how much of a toll it took on him. He definitely looked bitter, but she couldn’t tell if it was because of all the lives he’d lost or because he was responsible. Maybe both.

“Levi,” Erwin didn’t bother stopping, “Take Faye with you. Neither of you have squads to travel with, and I would feel much more at ease knowing you were looking out for one another.”

No one said anything, and when Erwin broke away from the pair to start giving out orders, the medic shuffled closer to the short captain.

“You should change your cloak,” Levi muttered out, stalking off towards a few soldiers with their horses. “It’s filthy, covered in dirt and sh*t.” He’d been focusing a little too hard on the green piece of fabric, needing a distraction from the badges in his pocket.

“Beef is in my hood,” She shrugged.

“Your sh*tty cat?” The short captain leaned to the side, growling at the sight of the feline nestled away, napping as though it were an average Thursday afternoon. “I’ll wash it when we get back to headquarters.”

“If you want,” Faye patted Chicken’s snout, letting the horse nuzzle against her hand. “I doubt the stains are going to come out, though.”

“Throw it out then,” Levi suggested, grip tightening on his horse's reins. “Won’t do you much good if it’s covered in blood.”

“Do you mind looking after Chicken and Beef?” The doctor quietly inquired, hands gently scooping Beef up before opening her saddle pouch and letting him get comfortable. “I’m going to say my goodbyes.”

Levi gave a solemn nod, accepting the reins from Faye before she set off towards the bodies, leaving him to turn away, intending to give her some privacy despite being a decent distance away.

Faye kneeled beside the ginger, the only body that hadn’t been loaded onto the wagon yet. The soldiers had the decency to not only shut Petra’s eyes but also give the captain some space.

She was at a loss for words, choosing instead to just stare down in silence for a passive heartbeat. It looked like the soldiers had wiped off the blood from her face, and if Faye hadn’t seen the carnage and state of her body earlier, she might have even mistaken Petra for only being asleep.

There was no rise and fall of her chest, and her body had already gone cold, turning her lips blue. Petra’s face had gone pale, the blood having drained from her face. The cloth covered her lower half, a sight that was gruesome for more reasons than one, though the blood had still soaked into the linen.

“Al’ isn’t going to know what to do with himself,” Faye softly stated. “He’s not done grieving for John, and definitely not your mom, and now you.” She didn’t touch the corpse, didn’t see her hands as clean enough to reach out and brush away the stray hair that fell on Petra’s forehead. “I’m going to do my best for him, but you need to give him a sign. Something for Al’ to cling on to. Anything. I can’t shoulder his depression alone.”

The breeze lined the air, blowing the stray hairs on Petra’s forehead out of the way. Distantly, she heard the sound of birds flying overhead and the sound of soldiers barking at each other. If Faye hadn’t known any better, she would have thought the afternoon was like any other-where casualties weren’t so abundant.

She shuddered in a breath.

War.

This was what war felt like when she was a child, and she couldn’t find it in herself to be surprised that she was still just as numb to it now as she was back then. Nothing had changed. Faye was still a scared little girl who wished she wasn't a victim of the ravages of war. The corpses, the blood, the war cries. It was the same no matter who you were fighting or where you found yourself. Whether it was the muddy trenches waiting below a barren wasteland or the thick, forested plains of Wall Maria, it felt the same.

The bodies were all the same. Piles of them from nonsensical violence, wounded by more than just physical injuries. It was all bullsh*t.

“Rest in peace.”

The Scout Regiment set off quickly, with Levi and Faye silently riding just a few paces behind Erwin, who hadn’t looked Faye in the eye since their conversation earlier. She understood, though. It wasn’t personal; the man just needed his space. Both him and Levi did.

It wasn’t even ten minutes into the journey back when a red flare shot into the sky, and a soldier shouted, “Titan! Spotted at the rear!”

Faye’s jaw clenched, keeping her shoulders alert but not overly tense.

“Full speed! All soldiers!” Erwin barked.

“Our best chance might be to circle back,” Levi proposed. “Make a beeline for the trees. We can’t put up much of a fight out here.” He had a point, and Faye could definitely credit the short captain for thinking so quickly.

“No,” Erwin denied. “Our best option now is to continue to the wall.”

She glanced back, frowning at the four titans who were gaining on the rear of the formation. They were going to catch up if something didn’t change.

“I’m heading back,” Faye called. “The titans are catching up to the wagons.” She didn’t wait for Erwin to say anything, slowing her horse down. When she glanced over, Levi nodded, following her lead.

“I’ll jump behind the bastard and distract him,” One of the soldiers offered from beside the corpse wagon. “It’ll give you a chance to put some distance-”

“Don’t bother,” Levi interjected, ignoring the incredulous looks the men gave him. “You’ve got to jettison the extra weight.”

His words reverberated in Faye’s head, fingers twitching. He wanted to throw the bodies to lessen the weight. In theory, it would work, but there was no telling whose body they were going to toss, and what if it was Petra’s?

‘Al’ would want one of you to make it back,’ A little voice inside Faye’s head argued. ‘Don’t leave him to grieve for two women.’

“What?” The soldier’s face fell into dumb confusion, the captain’s words not processing in his brain.

“Dump the bodies,” Faye snapped, dumbing it down for him. When the lackey tried to open his mouth to object, Faye cut in, “We’ve already left behind a sizeable amount of corpses. These aren’t any different. Dump them.” She twisted in her seat, narrowing her eyes at the titan before she swung her rifle around, carefully aiming and taking out its eyes.

“Are we doing this?” The soldier cried, visibly in denial. “We can’t seriously be doing this!”

“Consider it their last service to the cause,” Levi offered, ears ringing from the gunshots.

“Listen,” Faye’s heart was thrumming, “Bullets will only do so much, and I’ve only got half a hook on my gear.” She should have been more careful when she was taking down those titans earlier; maybe then she could have safely used her ODM gear. “The choice is yours, but you better make it quick.”

Her heart stopped when they started throwing the bodies to the wind. And for a split second, Faye was glad she couldn’t see the faces. They would only haunt her during the evening, and she was having trouble getting to sleep as is.

But then came the third corpse, the white cloth coming undone, and Faye’s breath hitched, a strangled sob clawing its way up her throat.

Ginger hair spilled from the cloth, revealing Petra’s soft, peaceful face. Her body rebounded against the hard ground, rolling away as the horses carried forward. The sun set the sky ablaze, creating a black silhouette overtop a red background. That was the last time anyone would ever see Petra Ral again. Alexander would have no body to cremate. Petra was gone forever.

“Faye,” Levi’s voice prompted her to look away, “Don’t go soft on me yet.”

“Yeah,” She bit her tongue, trying to focus on the physical pain rather than the way her heart had contracted. “I know.”

*

A lanky ginger teetered from foot to foot anxiously, the wings of freedom crest proudly displayed on his leather jacket as he waited for his comrades to return. The crowds had already started gathering, eager to jab and jeer at how many soldiers they’d lost in their battle against the titans.

It didn’t matter to Alexander Ral, though. He only needed two soldiers to come marching down the streets. Just two. A short brunette and an even shorter ginger. He could live with himself if they both came back.

“Eager to see the whor*?” A balding man sneered. “I hope she’s dead, for your and Petra’s sake.”

Al’ said nothing, moving further into the crowds to escape his father’s cruel words. His palms had gone clammy, his lips dry. It seemed like the longer he had to wait for the gate to open, the more insane he’d begun to feel.

His eyes snapped up at the sound of grating metal, heart thumping as he caught sight of Commander Erwin leading his troops to safety. Behind him came a throng of green cloaks, and his eyes had started to search among them desperately.

“Come on,” Al’ breathed, “Where are you, Faye?”

Levi had opted out of riding, choosing to lead his horse into the walls, with Faye doing the same. His ankle was aching, dull, stabbing pain throbbing every time he put weight on it, but it didn’t matter. He deserved every minute of it. Levi’s head flashed with the horrifying images of his squad, covered in blood. Yeah, this was nothing in comparison.

He snuck a glance at Faye, frowning. She hadn’t spoken a word since he’d asked her not to go soft on him after dumping the bodies, and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t getting worried. Of course, Levi would never outright voice his concerns to her face; he had never been good at talking about feelings regardless of if they were his or someone else's.

“Oi,” He nudged her arm. “You still having tea with Erwin and me?” His frown deepened when she mutely nodded. Was she angry with him for ordering the body dump? He couldn’t blame her; he wasn’t exactly pleased with himself either.

“Excuse me, Captain Levi?” A man addressed somewhat nervously. The man’s eyes darted toward Faye with a scowl, but it was only for a second. Already, he was pulling Levi off to the side, clicking his tongue at how The Captain gently held onto Faye’s elbow, tugging her along too. It seemed Alexander wasn’t kidding when he implied Captain Levi favored the illicit doctor. “Good evening, I uh- yes. I’m Petra’s father, sir.” He introduced.

Faye shot a sidelong grimace at the name, but before she could open her mouth, Alexander had arrived on the scene, pulling the brunette into a bone-crushing hug. He was warm, and he sighed out in relief when Faye wrapped her own hands around his torso.

“So, I don’t know where Beef is,” Alexander started, heart hammering in his chest. “I was hoping maybe we could both go to the castle to call for him?” No answer. “I think he was just out for a walk when I called him, that’s all. We’ll find him, I promise.”

“Al’,” Faye sucked in a breath, pulling away from her best friend. “Listen to me,” Tenderly, her hands came up, palming Alexander’s cheeks while she forced him to bend down a bit. “Petra passed away.” She held his eye, watching her words process in his brain.

“Did you bring the body back?” His words sounded distant, as though they’d come from someone else.

“No.”

She watched his face crumple while he swallowed. Then, his legs buckled, and Faye raced to catch him by the torso before he fell. She grunted, easing him to the ground. She could see the tears welling in his eyes and the quiver his chin took as Alexander pulled Faye forward. He was sitting, and he wrapped his hands around his best friend just as the first sob wracked through his body.

Faye rubbed small circles into Alexander’s back, letting him cry into her shoulder. They were off to the side, far enough away from the streets the Scouts were marching down that no one would spare them a second glance. She didn’t say anything, just sat with him. He deserved that much.

Levi peered up at the crestfallen gaze Petra’s father held while he clutched tightly to Levi’s wrist.

“This is all some sick joke, isn’t it? You-you handpicked my Petra because of her outstanding abilities as a soldier, so how could she be dead?-” The middle-aged man questioned in blatant denial.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” The Captain apologized, tightening his grip on his horse's reins. “She was a dedicated soldier. You should be proud to have called her your daughter.” The words sounded mechanical on his tongue. “We’ve advanced so much today because of her brave actions.” He hated himself for lying to Petra’s father.

“I-” The old man gurgled, his voice failing him while Levi watched tears well in Mr. Ral’s eyes. He’d turned away quickly, refusing to meet The Captain’s eyes. Mr. Ral’s fists shook with every step forward, and before he even knew what he was doing, he arrived before Faye, holding tightly to his son. A son that had disgraced his family name.

“You!” He snarled, ripping Faye away. “You were supposed to be there for your sister. Instead you were playing hooky, neglecting your duties as a soldier, and now look at what’s happened! My little girl is dead.” His nostrils flared, fisting Alexander’s shirt. “Dead, Alexander. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead!” Mr. Ral’s hand came down, intending to strike the bane of his existence, but he was knocked off balance, tumbling down in a heap with someone else clutching tightly to his form.

“That’s your son ,” Faye huffed, keeping her body weight over top of Mr. Ral, pinning his hands. “Alexander is the only family you have left, and you’re callous enough to strike him?” Her lip curled back in disgust, eyes hard. “Show some compassion, old man. You aren’t the only one grieving.” She released his hands, slowly moving her leg off of the insipid man, but instead, her back met the ground, and she could have sworn she heard it crack.

“Listen here, whor* ,” Mr. Ral spat; his face had gone red. “My family affairs have nothing to do with you, do you understand me? If I choose to beat my son, I expect you to mind your own business.”

“That’s my lieutenant you assaulted,” The doctor’s patience was wearing thin. She’d had one hell of a day, and Mr. Ral was only worsening her mood. “Not to mention my best friend. If you’re going to blame someone for Petra’s death, you can blame me. I gave Al’ the day off. I was the only medic on duty. I didn’t get there on time-”

Faye saw him dart his hands out, but she didn’t move, didn’t so much as flinch. Not even when her windpipe started throbbing and burning, she couldn’t tell if she was wheezing, but her hands stayed limp, unwilling to claw at the hands squeezing her esophagus. Distantly, she could hear Alexander screaming, begging his father to stop. In her peripherals, she saw a crowd forming around the spectacle. She couldn’t make out any of the faces, but she was certain they all looked horrified. Who wouldn’t?

It was fleeting, but when Faye blinked, she flinched. Mr. Ral had morphed into one of the men from the brothel in Shiganshina, his fingers gleefully squeezing the life from her neck. It was over when he started talking again, grounding her in the reality of the situation.

“She was my daughter, you filth,” Mr. Ral seethed. “She never even got to marry, have kids of her own, gain Captain Levi’s interest.” His own words were racing around in his brain as he throttled Faye’s neck. “You’re a whor*, do you understand me, girl? You destroyed Petra’s chances of accepting Captain Levi’s proposal, and when she laid there, dying, you couldn’t even save her.”

The lack of oxygen made her eyes go bleary, sending bright, lucid shapes dancing around her vision. She could feel her heart thumping against her chest, trying its damnest to pump blood to her cells, but she couldn’t bring her hands up to fight against Mr. Ral’s tightening fingers. He was angry, and he had every right to be.

Air flooded Faye’s lungs, sending her into a coughing fit, and Mr. Ral’s body weight was thrown off her. Levi and Alexander kneeled next to her, leaving Mike to deal with the situation.

“Hey!” Mike’s fury presented itself in the collected expression on his face. The way his lips curled down, his eyes narrowed, and a dangerous growl bubbling in his throat. He easily yanked Mr. Ral off Faye. “That’s a military captain you almost killed.” Mike’s hand clutched tightly to the balding man’s collar, lifting him just slightly from the ground. “Do you have any idea the hell Faye went through today?”

“She killed my daughter!” Mr. Ral clawed at Mike’s hand, he was still raging, and his anger was only doubled at the sight of Levi, who had kneeled beside Faye to help her sit up. “That bitch killed my Petra, and you’re going to let her walk around free? She’s a murderer, and you’re going to protect her?”

Alexander’s fists were shaking, and the longer he listened to his father’s bullsh*t, the less of a grip he had over his emotions and actions. One second, he was watching Mike scowl; the next, Alexander had pounced forward, knocking his father to the ground.

“It wasn’t her fault!” The boy snapped, his fist reeling back before it connected with Mr. Ral’s bottom lip. “It was never Faye’s fault; why don’t you understand that?” He repeated the motion on his other hand, ignoring the sensation of his skin splitting at the knuckle. “It wasn’t Faye’s fault when mom died, it wasn’t her fault when Uncle John died, and it wasn’t her fault when Petra died.”

Mike seemed like he was in blatant shock. He’d never seen Alexander so livid, but now that he was watching the tormented boy beat the sh*t out of his father, he wasn’t so sure he wanted to step in. The man was a complete asshole, and maybe a beating would knock the loose screws back into place in his head.

Faye, on the other hand, had scrambled to her feet, the world tilting on its axis from the blood rush. She felt Levi’s fingertips brush her hand, trying to grab onto her, but she was already one step ahead, moving forward to catch Alexander’s fist as it came up for the fifth time.

“That’s enough,” Faye’s voice had dropped, surveying the scene.

Mr. Ral laid in a heap, blood trickling down his newly broken nose, and his lips had been split. The man’s left eye had started to swell, the bruising already shifting his skin to a deep purple and blue.

“He’s being a complete dick-”

“You’re all he has left,” Faye cut in pointedly, still firmly holding Alexander’s wrist. “Why do you think he’s not fighting you off? He didn’t even try to shake you off.” The frown cracked into a thin line, and the longer she felt Alexander’s watchful gaze, the more exhausted she felt. Like the day just wouldn’t end already. “He’s your dad, Al’, and he’s grieving. Both of you are. You’re all he has left.”

“That’s bullsh*t!” Alexander barked, his free fist pulling back, but he growled when Faye caught it with her free hand.

“What’s bullsh*t is how petulant you’re acting right now,” Faye’s patience was fraying faster than she could mend, and if this didn’t end soon, she was going to have a meltdown. “And you,” the doctor’s eyes darted down to the mess of a man below Alexander, the blood decorating his face in a gruesome display. “Man up and put effort into your relationship with your son. My dad never made the best decisions, and he certainly regretted not being nicer to his son.”

“What would you know about my son and me?” Mr. Ral’s teeth were stained red, peeking out from his bloody lips every time he opened his mouth. “You’re a whor* who-”

Alexander wasn’t really sure how it happened. One second, he was straddling his father, and the next, Faye had pushed him aside, assuming the exact same position. Her hand darted out, taking hold of Mr. Rals, and before Levi or Mike could move to stop her, Faye had already gripped onto one of his fingers, curling it and pressing in while the man writhed beneath her.

“I know enough.” It was a wonder how Faye maintained her calm attitude despite nearly breaking Mr. Ral’s finger. She was keeping a steady pressure on it, just enough to keep him compliant in listening. “My father was a spineless man who bent to the will of others in his youth, much like you do now. He spent years mourning the relationship he ruined with his son, and if you don’t rein in your pride, you’ll die harboring the same fatal flaws he did.” Mr. Ral’s eyes had gone wide, but Faye didn’t let up. She wasn’t done. “Another thing. I might have worked in a brothel during my teenage years, but that doesn’t give you the right to debase and shame me. I did what I thought would best help my family financially, and I left that job as soon as I could. The next time you call me a whor* in an attempt to humiliate me or discredit my position within the military, you’ll be dealing with Zachary.”

“And what about all the lives you’ve taken?” Mr. Ral questioned coldly, halting Faye from getting off of him.

A tense heartbeat passed, one where Faye clenched her jaw with a stony expression.

“They’ll pass judgment on me in Hell.”

Levi held out a hand for Faye, helping her off Alexander’s father, who hadn’t moved. She didn’t look back at him, just started forward, placing one foot in front of the other with a mask of indifference.

‘Just a bit longer,’ She reassured herself. ‘Just until you find somewhere private.’

“Faye...” Alexander had scrambled to step in line with his captain, a sullen tilt on his lips. “That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you defend yourself.”

The doctor faltered in her steps, turning her head to regard Alexander, who expectantly stared right back at her. The boy still had tears streaming down his cheeks and stood at least a foot taller than her. Under normal circ*mstances, she wouldn’t have said anything, but Alexander looked like he had a sh*tty day, and if Faye were being honest, he deserved an answer.

“I think it’s about time I lay the title of ‘whor*’ to rest, don’t you think?”

Chapter 19: 15. Post Expedition

Chapter Text

The castle was drafty. The short brunette couldn’t tell where the bizarre current came from, but the air swept straight through Faye’s bones and plunged deep into her soul, grasping at the little warmth she exuded. She wouldn’t complain, though. At least Erwin hadn’t sent her with Mike and Hange to the hostel to look after everyone else.

Levi sat across from Faye, languidly swirling his tea. Eren sat a few seats down the table, staring down at his hands aimlessly.

“What’s the holdup?” Levi impatiently questioned. He’d never looked so casual, opting out of his usual button-up shirt and cravat for a white sweatshirt and a pair of casual-wear pants. “Erwin’s never late; they should be here.” He stared at the wall behind Faye. “At this rate, the damn MPs’ll show up first,” Faye couldn’t quite place why the short captain acted so lively. Maybe he was uncomfortable with the silence. “That’d be our luck,” He took a sip of tea, sighing into the cup. “Yeah, who can say? Maybe they’re all takin’ a sh*t. Duty calls, right?” His eyes glanced over to Eren, who’d chuckled quietly at Levi’s words, easing into his skin a bit more.

“You’re, uh,” Eren stuttered lamely, “Sure in a talkative mood today,” Eren commented, sending a weak, hopeful smile up at his captain while Faye watched the exchange.

“So what if I am?” Levi countered, “Doesn’t mean I was talkin’ to you,” He went to shift in his seat before he winced, shooting his hand out to clutch his left leg. Faye watched with interest as he tried to cover his injury up.

“Are you hurt?”

“No,” Levi tried to say, but Faye shot her leg out, softly kicking his knee. The Captain bit back a growl, clutching to his leg as it pulsated. During the ride back, his ankle swelled up, but he thought his pants hid the injury - which begged the question of how the hell Faye found out in the first place. “That’s the second time you’ve purposefully hurt me, you know?”

“I told you that I thought you were a ghost,” Faye huffed, dramatically setting her cup down before she shifted her medical bag and kneeled in front of Levi. “It wasn’t my fault you scared the sh*t out of me. How was I supposed to know?” Gently, she started assessing the damage to his ankle.

“I’ve never heard of someone accidentally punching another person,” Levi remarked with a dry attitude.

“Stand up for a second,“ Faye ordered, shuffling back. Her hands grazed the back of his thigh, earning a dirty look. She paid no mind and continued, prodding at the tender muscles and skin.The medic paid extra attention to the little mannerisms-like how his fingers jolted every time she pressed a little too tightly or nudged the wrong spot that helped Faye discern what exactly he’d hurt. “Sprained ankle-“

“I could have told you that,“ Levi muttered, sitting back down.

“And a torn hamstring,“ Faye sent him a withering stare, hands rummaging around through her medical bag. “Take a few of these whenever it gets bad, and stay off your leg. I’ll talk to Erwin about it to make sure he isn’t sending you off on taxing missions.” She left a jar of pills on the table before she returned to her own chair.

Sometimes Levi was unnecessarily difficult.

“It’s my fault, sir. I made the choice,” Eren spoke up from his seat, guiltily staring at his captain. “If I’d have thought this through, none of this-” His voice caught in his throat, causing him to painfully avert his gaze. “We wouldn’t-”

“You made a judgment call,” Levi interjected, “No one expects you to be clairvoyant,” The Captain ran a hand through his hair, shifting in his seat. His good foot nudged into Faye’s, an action so minuscule no one else would ever notice it. She did, though, and the small smile she shot him made his heart flutter.

It didn’t take long before the door opened, and Erwin strode in and down the steps, a string of young recruits following in an orderly line. Among them trailed little Armin Arlert, followed closely by Jean. The pair looked to be anything but happy, and tired frowns tugged their lips down.

Faye gave a short nod to the blond teenager, glad he followed her advice in talking to Erwin. The Commander possessed a bizarre knack for coming up with plans, and if anyone could help navigate their best options, it would be Erwin Smith.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Erwin politely said, listening to Eren gasp in his seat.

“What the-” Surprise flittered over Faye’s brother’s face. “Why-Why are you all here?” He sent a weak finger up at the recruits, knowing them all through having been in the 104th Training Corps together.

Silently, Faye’s eyes flickered between Armin and Erwin, noting just how similar the pair looked. Erwin could have been Armin’s older brother just by the physical likeness the two shared. The blond hair, the bright blue eyes, the pale complexions. Sure, The Commander towered over Armin, but the boy still had time to grow. It was a wonder she’d never noticed it before. The comparisons ran deeper than just outward appearances too. Armin possessed the mind of a genius, and it wouldn’t surprise Faye if the boy helped construct whatever plan Erwin planned on presenting.

“We believe we’ve uncovered the Female Titan’s true identity,” Erwin stated, motioning for the young soldiers to group around the table as he spread a map out. “She won’t slip away this time.” He held a bitter edge to his words that reverberated in his chest, not going unnoticed by Levi and Faye.

“The day after tomorrow, we’ll be passing through the Stohess District en route to the capital,” He explained, pointing at the map. “That’s when we’ll strike. It’ll be our first and only chance to do so,” Faye could practically hear him adding ‘ So don’t screw it up ,’ to the end of his sentence, but instead, he continued, using the map as a visual aid. “Once we’ve set foot in the interior, the government will assume custody of Eren, and the Scouts’ authority to continue operations will be limited.” He’d obviously spent a while going over his plan, carefully eliminating whatever bumps in the road he could think of. “Thus, unless we wish to concede defeat, we must flush out the enemy now. So, here’s what we do.”

Faye watched with interest as he pointed down to what looked like a desolate alleyway, “While in Stohess, we use Eren as bait, luring the target into this underground passage,” His finger trailed down, showing the designated route. “The deeper, the better. Get her well beneath street level,” He ordered, watching everyone around the table nod in understanding. “That done, she should be easily immobilized, even in titan form.” Faye’s stomach shifted uncomfortably, dread settling into her bones as Erwin continued. “If she transforms before reaching the tunnel, well, at that point, she’ll be your responsibility, Eren.”

Faye tuned out of the conversation, instead leaning over to Levi to review the papers he held. Humanity’s Strongest didn’t typically ever look-well- happy, but it seemed ever more true in the sight of him glaring down at the stack of papers. Distantly, she could hear Eren’s world imploding in on himself, refusing to believe Annie was the Female Titan, but Faye shrugged his plight off easily. Lately, it seemed that Eren found himself in a constant state of shock; he’d have no trouble picking apart his feelings without her aid.

Her eyes roved at a list of names and their positions within Erwin’s new plan. Levi took the liberty of scratching out whatever Erwin intended for her, and instead, he’d neatly written “Comic Relief” and “Glorified Babysitter.”

“Okay, we get it,” Levi sighed, apparently having been listening to the conversation. “Do you have anything else on her? Any concrete evidence?” He questioned tiredly, his gaze flickering over to his empty teacup.

“There’s the fact that she looks like the Female Titan,” Mikasa quietly admitted, calmly watching Eren jump to his feet in anger.

“Really? What the hell’s wrong with you?” He spat, “What kind of evidence is that?”

“So basically, you’re going after her without proof,” Levi shot a blank stare at Mikasa and Eren, apparently unimpressed by their groundings.

“You’re kidding me, right?” Eren looked small, his world imploding. “This is insane. What if it’s not her? What if she’s not the monster you all say she is?” The boy desperately clung to the idea that Annie was innocent, and he outwardly showed it.

“If it’s not her, she’ll be cleared,” Mikasa shrugged. “End of story.”

“No one wants to condemn her prematurely, least of all me,” Armin confessed sympathetically. “But either we make a move based on circ*mstantial evidence, or we sit back and let the central government condemn you.”

Eren averted his eyes, his temples glistening with sweat in the candlelight. “Do you even hear yourselves?” He questioned, “We’re talking about Annie.”

Faye shifted forward in her seat, rolling her shoulders backward before she piped in to give her two cents.

“Eren,” Faye addressed, raising her chin and sending her little brother a pointed look. “I know you want to believe the best in people, but it doesn’t hurt to reserve some wariness for others.” Eren’s jaw tightened just slightly, and she watched his anger boil. “Me, for example,” She continued, ignoring the upset glare she recieved. “I know you love me, you know I love you, but if you posed a serious threat to the walls and the innocent lives that reside within them, I would eliminate you,” It was a lie, of course, but Eren didn’t need to know that. He just needed a little sisterly push. “Just like I hope you would do the same for me.”

Erwin and Levi stared at Faye, somewhat awestruck. Neither could tell if she told the truth, but either way, they were both mildly surprised at how boldly she’d admitted to the possibility of killing her brother to his face .

Eren averted his gaze, glaring down at the table and clenching his fists.

“Eren, don’t stand there and tell me this conversation isn’t ringing any bells,” Mikasa articulated. “You fought hand-to-hand against the Female Titan, was there anything about her techniques that seemed familiar?” The teenager pushed, forcing Eren to turn the metaphorical cogs inside of his head. “Dig deep. It’s Annie. You know it is,” Mikasa urged. “And you have to fight. Unless-” She hesitated, her resolve cracking just slightly. “Unless there’s something deeper keeping you from it.”

Faye quietly watched the rest of the meeting, her eyes trained on Eren, who had also gone quiet. Despite nodding along and paying attention, he was obviously at odds with himself. The boy wasn’t the type to think before he acted, but it looked like he was actually mulling over Mikasa’s words, which only worried Faye.

It didn’t take long after that the recruits all retired to discuss the expedition and upcoming mission together, which left Erwin, Levi, and Faye sitting at the table, staring down at the map.

“You’re sure I shouldn’t go with you guys?” Faye dully inquired, fingers drumming against her leg.

“If Annie isn’t the Female Titan, then Mike is going to need help keeping the rest of the recruits safe.” Erwin’s hand came up, raking through his hair in a tired motion. He looked a little better than he did when Faye spoke to him while they were still outside the walls, but judging from the dark circles under his eyes, he needed to get some rest.

“Levi is out of commission,” Faye sighed. “Don’t put him on the front lines; he sprained his ankle and tore his hamstring.”

Erwin didn’t even look surprised; he just nodded like it was to be expected.

“You look well,” Erwin noted, leaning back in his seat. “I take it the nap and shower you took when we arrived aided in your mental recovery?” He couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling brewing in the pits of his stomach, though seeing the color brought back to Faye’s eyes helped settle the disquietude.

“I wasn’t expecting the weight of my role as a soldier to hit me so hard, that’s all,” Faye mumbled. “I had a lot of intrusive thoughts, and I kept thinking about my time in Marley.” The name still sent a jolt of electricity to her heart, prompting the muscle to thrum inside her chest.

“A penny for your thoughts?” The blond offered. His mind kept teetering back to the hug. It was an innocent act, but it solidified the fondness and adoration he felt towards the woman. He enjoyed his fair share of women and men over the years, but somehow… Faye just seemed different. Maybe it was all the knowledge she possessed, brewing inside that pretty head of hers or the fact that her wit was as sharp as her combat skills.

“The Female Titan,” The doctor hesitantly started, “I don’t think you realize just how close I came to being her.” That was if Orwell and his spies intel could even be trusted. “Then, when you were ordering your men around, I just-” Her brows furrowed, trying to find a way to describe it. “You just sounded so apathetic-like you didn’t give two sh*ts. It reminded me of some of the men who ordered me around as a kid. I hardly recognized you.”

“I hardly recognized you ,” Levi spoke up, leveling with Faye. “You looked like you had to take a sh*t the entire time.”

“Definitely felt like it,” She snorted, staring down at her hands. “I’ll try to be more outward with my emotions on the next one. Besides, I think Al’ would lose his sh*t if I acted like that with him around.”

“How are you fairing with your grieving process?” Erwin’s eyes searched hers, patiently waiting for a response. Good or bad, he could deal with, but he needed to know so he could help.

“I’m processing it all,” Faye earnestly said. “I’m still kind of in shock with Petra.” How was she supposed to tell Alexander about Petra’s plan to go on leave with him? She already knew it was going to worsen the boy’s depression. “It’s just a matter of taking the time to mourn, though. Give me a few days, and I’ll get over it.”

“What did you mean when you said you were close to being the Female Titan?” It was Levi who spoke, a contemplative frown adorning his lips. Typically, he wouldn’t have even bothered asking, but the longer he thought about it, the more he realized he needed an answer. If only to put his mind at ease.

“If I hadn’t left Marley when I did, it’s likely I would have gotten a titan.” The words tumbled out of Faye’s lips before she could stop herself. Silence blanketed the air, hanging over the trio as they all stared at each other. “It’s complicated,” Faye murmured, slumping in her chair. “I can’t give you all the details yet.”

Shame. Faye was drowning in self-loathing and shame, too far away from the coast for anyone to send her a line. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to explain it all to Erwin and Levi; it was that she didn’t even know where to start - or how. How was she supposed to tell them that Marley wasn’t an organization; it was an entire country filled with people who were just as oppressed as the Eldians inside the walls? How was she supposed to tell them that their technology was almost an entire century behind? That she’d turned herself in after her parents because her twin exposed them as part of a restorationist group that aimed to overthrow the Marleyan government, and she couldn’t live without having said goodbye to her father? How was she supposed to tell them any of her past without sounding like she should be in a mental institution?

Levi drummed his fingers against the table for a moment before he impatiently spoke. “Well? I’m waiting. Are you going to talk about your feelings and finish your thought already? I’ve taken sh*ts that have come out faster than you talk.”

Her fingertips twitched as her spine stiffened.

“I was just going to say that the thought horrified me. That’s all,” The medic conceded. “Annie is still just a kid, and the burden they’re placing on her is probably crushing her from the inside out.” The view of tears streaming down the Female Titan’s face flashed in Faye’s mind. “I was almost the one who killed Petra.”

“Why did you leave?”

Faye’s heart hammered, pounding away at her chest so hard it physically hurt. “Shiganshina,” the medic promised. “I wouldn’t even know how to tell you everything. Too much information to sift through, and we’ve already got our hands full with Annie.”

“What about after we deal with the Female Titan?” Erwin knew he was pushing, but he’d been dying to pick her brain for nearly two months, and his insides started to burn. Truthfully, he wouldn’t be surprised if Faye shot him down, it seemed personal, and she’d reiterated numerous times she wanted to wait until they made it to Shiganshina to make the retelling easier. Something about her father’s journals would make it easier, likely because he wrote all the important events down.

“I’m not promising anything,” Faye hesitantly conceded. “But if you’re so adamant on knowing, then it’s only a matter of time before you take matters into your own hands, and that’s infinitely more dangerous than me confiding in the two of you.”

Levi watched the exchange, frowning. Erwin was practically twisting Faye’s arm in the situation, and the medic was starting to buckle under the pressure. Maybe the expedition really was getting to her more than she let on.

“Faye,” Erwin called out softly, watching her turn to look at him. “Did you mean what you said to Eren?” The question burned in the back of his head, and he’d been aching to ask her about it for the last hour.

“About killing him?” She glanced at Levi, who hunched forward slightly, eager to hear her response. “f*ck no. I’d rather die a violent and psychologically tortured death than murder my own brother,” She admitted easily. “I just figured he needed to be put back into his place, and he needed a nudge in the right direction.” Faye let a heartbeat pass before she continued. “Besides. I was expecting him or Armin to call me out on my bullsh*t. Do you know how many lives I indirectly killed?”

“And,” Erwin hesitated, glancing between her and Levi with uncertainty. “About your earlier question. In the forest-” He slowly started, taken aback when Faye shook her head, quickly throwing her hands up.

“Your secret is safe with me,” She gave a mock salute, glancing between the two quickly. “Speaking of which, I’ll just be off now. You guys probably want some alone time to de-stress.”

“Oi!” Levi’s voice started Faye’s movements, halting her in her tracks before she could get very far. “Have you been getting the nightmares yet?” He watched her movements like a hawk, the way she slowly turned around to meet his eyes, the clenched jaw, the tightened fists. He knew the answer, but he wanted to hear Faye say it.

“Yeah.” She sighed. “My nap earlier got cut short, but I took a caffeine pill and-”

“You wanna sleep with Erwin and me tonight?” The words sounded so innocent in his head, but the second they hit the open air, Levi cursed himself to hell and back. “Not-sh*t-not like that,” He scrambled to sit up in his chair, heart pounding against his ribcage. He was an idiot; Erwin should have been the one talking to Faye - he had always been better with words and sh*t. “Not like that,” He repeated. “Like, a-a deep sleep. We’d all be asleep-”

Erwin’s hand sympathetically clamped down on Levi’s shoulder, silently urging the short captain to stop talking.

“I think what Levi means to say is that we understand your dilemma, and we’ve found that sleeping in the same bed as another person helps with the nightmares.” The Commander’s words were smooth and fluent, though he faltered at the toothy grin Faye wore.

“So you guys sleep in the same bed?”

Both men froze, their backs stiffening, shoulders tensing, eyes going wide. Erwin’s mind reeled, with Faye’s voice echoing, ‘Off, the books, are you seeing anyone?’ Mortification rolled through him as he realized she knew about his monthly brothel visits.

“What the hell are you going on about?” Levi’s brows furrowed at the suggestive side-eye Faye was dealing the men.

“It’s not like that,” Erwin defended, “It’s-” He stopped himself. He couldn’t even tell the truth without it sounding exactly how Faye probably imagined it. “It’s innocent. We’re not together.”

Levi nearly choked on his saliva, the realization hitting him like a ton of bricks.

“f*ck no,” The short captain rushed to supply. “That sh*t ended two years ago.”

“So, is this going to be my bedtime story?” The doctor grinned; she genuinely just couldn’t help it. They were making quite the spectacle of themselves, and after the awful day she’d undergone, she needed some comic relief.

“I think we’ll save that story for when you reveal everything else to us,” Erwin’s lips twitched up, “A fair trade, wouldn’t you say?”

*

It had to have been close to two hours the two men laid in silence.

Neither Erwin nor Levi was able to sleep when Faye was sandwiched between the two, snoozing the night away. Their minds were reeling, going over the days' events, and thinking of the upcoming journey to Mitras. Every once in a while, the medic would shift in her sleep, though she stayed quiet.

“You think she’ll be okay with Mike?” Levi quietly asked, voice hoarse.

“He’s Humanity’s Second Strongest, Levi,” Erwin sighed, running a hand through his hair. Truth be told, he was wondering the same thing. “Mike wouldn’t let anything happen to Faye - he values her too much. Besides, Faye can look after herself; she took down five titans in rapid succession. She’ll be fine.” He couldn’t tell if he was saying the words to appease Levi or himself.

“Five?” Levi’s brows raised in approval.

“Who knows how many she took down when she was a kid, too.” The blond reminded. “You would have been proud at how efficient she was.”

“How’d she break her gear?” Levi couldn’t shake the question since he’d noticed it in the first place in the forest, and Erwin seemed to have been watching with a rather close eye, so if anyone knew, it would be him.

“A titan grabbed hold of her line,” The Commander was stoic in his explanation. “Didn’t even flinch when she cut it.” He memorized the exact movement her arm took, the angle in which the blade swung down, the subtle jaw clench as she started to fall before she shot out her free line and narrowly escaped the wide jaws of an awaiting titan below. “She’s an exceptional soldier.”

“Don’t put her on a pedestal.” Levi let out a discontentedly grunted. He knew the glint in Erwin’s eyes a little too well, and it made him uncomfortable that he was unknowingly glorifying Faye. “She’s got enough riding on her shoulders; she doesn’t need your sh*tty expectations.”

“They’re not sh*tty,” Erwin defended, frowning at how insulted he felt. “I expect the same from her as I do you.”

“Exactly-” Levi froze when Faye shifted in her sleep, holding his breath and praying to the walls that he hadn’t accidentally woken her up.

Erwin didn’t miss a beat in pulling the blanket back up over her shoulders, gently tucking her in while ignoring the glare he was receiving from Humanity’s Strongest from the other side of Faye.

“Do you love her?” Erwin’s voice was so soft and content; his gaze didn’t waver from Faye’s face, studying the curvature of her nose and cheeks.

“Do you?” Levi countered rather swiftly, watching his commander’s eyes slide from Faye to him.

There was a long bout of silence in which the two men gauged and sized the other up, trying to get a read on the other’s thoughts. It wasn’t surprising to either of them, but it was disquieting to think that they were both pining for the same woman.

“I see,” Erwin’s chest rumbled as he spoke, lips tilting into an amused curve. “May the best man win.”

Faye twitched in her sleep, muffled words reverberating through the otherwise silent office. Her eyebrows furrowed, a deep frown lined her lips. Her hand subconsciously moved as though blocking a hit.

"Wonder what she's dreaming about," The blond voiced, watching the woman shift again.

“She’s getting restless-”

Faye's head dug into the bed, a whine sounding out.

The sound was foreign to the two men. Sure, they'd heard Faye hiss out a few swears when she had a bullet lodged into her stomach, and they'd heard her groan in annoyance. But a whine ? It wasn't just a small one, either. It was guttural. The sound rumbled in her throat before clawing its way out in an almost pained wince.

"Wake her up," Levi ordered. His knuckles went white from the tight fists he made. The sound made him anxious and physically nauseous. She hadn't made a peep that night on the roof, so what was getting her so riled up now?

Erwin was gentle in shaking her shoulder, patiently calling her name. He watched her eyes open and recognition filter through her expression.

“It was just a nightmare,” The Commander softly assured. “Whatever it was, you’re okay now.”

“I-I was-” She couldn’t catch her breath, and the sweat glistened in the orange glow cast by the candle on the nightstand. “I think- I need to go,” She meant to just shuffle away from Erwin, but she bumped straight into Levi. “sh*t, I-I’m sorry.”

Faye flinched when Erwin’s hand clamped onto her forearm in an attempt to steady her, but the sudden movement was so jarring, the blond ripped his hand away, quietly wondering if he accidentally hurt her.

“I’m just-” The panic was welling up in Faye’s stomach. Her mouth started to salivate, and she felt her stomach give an unsettling lurch. “Where’s the bathroom?”

Levi’s words were gurgled in the doctor’s mind, but her brain managed to register the extended finger. That was all it took for Faye to send herself flying from the bed, opening the door and throwing herself at the base of the toilet, where she felt dinner crawl its way up her throat.

Levi was the first to react, barking at Erwin to grab the glass of water on the nightstand as he rushed into the bathroom with a blanket at the ready. The short captain didn’t waste any time in pulling Faye’s hair back before wrapping the tattered fabric around her quivering shoulders.

She heaved again, the tears burning at her eyes while her stomach contracted, driving a metaphorical knife straight into her innards.

Erwin was quick with the cup of water, setting it down next to the sink before he kneeled on the floor, rubbing circles into her back.

“That’s it,” The blond winced when her shoulders heaved again. “Get it all out. Atta girl.”

“I’m not a dog,” Faye’s forehead rested against the toilet bowl. The words were muffled, sounding distant and vague like she was underwater. The cool ceramic felt nice against her forehead; it gave her something to focus on.

“You want me to get Ral?” Levi was still holding her hair, frowning. Faye’s nausea came out of nowhere, and his chest kept squeezing at the pitiful pile the medic had been reduced to in a matter of seconds.

“No, he’s-” She recoiled from the toilet, “He’s sleeping. He needs it.”

“Here,” Erwin stretched, his free arm coming out to grab the cup before he held it to her. “Drink some water.”

“You want that sh*tty mouthwash-sh*t,” Levi’s hand left Faye’s hair faster than she could process. “Don’t cry.” His heart plummeted when her eyes met his, still gulping water down. “Don’t-sh*t. Erwin!”

“Come on,” The Commander was on his feet in an instant, gently helping Faye up. “Drink the rest of that water and calm down. Levi and I will make the bed; it’ll give you a minute or two to gather your bearings.” He wasted no time in turning away from the medic, whose tears moved something in the deepest pits of his soul.

Levi shut the door behind himself. Faye probably wanted some privacy to clear her tears away, and he couldn’t imagine she wanted an audience to her tears. She’d run the last time she started crying, and he could only assume it was her way of preserving her dignity.

It was only two minutes, but it felt like an eternity before Faye left the bathroom. She’d dried her tears, but she looked to be in a fragile state. She held her elbow, shyly keeping her eyes trained on the ground.

“You going to stand there like you just took a sh*t, or are you going to sit down and talk?” Levi quipped, patting the bed between him and Erwin.

“I think I’ll just return to my room,” She mumbled. “I don’t want to keep you guys up when you have to leave in the morning.”

“You’ll be on our minds if you don’t tell us anything,” Erwin pointed out.

She gave out a great sigh, her chest rising with the expansion of her lungs before she deflated and made her way back to the bed between the two men. She sat with her back against the headboard, holding her knees to her chest.

Her eyes were burning again, and she felt the liquid drip down her cheek.

"I expected myself to cry a lot sooner, somewhere in private, where I didn't have to worry. But when we got here, I tried and-" Her throat was closing in on itself, forming a lump that couldn't be swallowed. "-And then earlier, and I kept seeing Petra's eyes-" Her voice was coming out strangled, and the tears only multiplied when Erwin's hand met hers, gently squeezing. "I couldn't save her-I couldn't save anyone. What kind of doctor can't save lives?"

"It wasn't your fault," The blond was almost being too soft with her, his hand darting out to entwine his fingers with Faye's. "What happened to blaming it on the titans and cutting your losses?"

"It's different for me," Shame was coursing through Faye's veins, whispering every bad deed she'd ever enacted. "I'm the medic of the Survey Corps, so I should have been able to deal with it. I shouldn't be sitting her, bawling my eyes out over some stupid nightmare where you, Levi and Al' were swallowed by-" 'By my mother...' She shuddered in a breath. "By a titan." That would have to do for now.

Neither of the men said anything. In their line of work, it was rare to see a soldier live long enough to retire. Death was considered a Scout's retirement.

"It's stupid, I know. I don't even know why I'm so attached to you guys," The doctor continued, breaking the silence. "All you do-" She looked to Erwin, "-Is ask me uncomfortable questions about my past. And all you do-" She glanced at Levi, "-Is grouch all day and nitpick about cleaning." Her laugh was wet, and it got caught in the back of her throat, getting choked by her esophagus contracting. "I really don't know, but I think you guys are my best friends. I mean, you guys know more about me than Al' does."

"They don't go away," Levi softly conceded. "Some nights are easier than others, but you won't be able to forget them no matter how hard you try." He balled his fists, his nails digging into the skin of his palm. "When you start forgetting their faces, they'll start talking to you, mocking you and-"

"I know." Faye let her hand rest on top of his, prompting him to release the tension. "I just- I thought I was over all the nightmares. I used to get them all the time as a kid."

"Just- try and get some sleep. You look like sh*t." It was an action so small, most would have glossed right over it. But when Levi turned his palm up, gently lacing his fingers with hers, Faye's heart sprung to life.

"Levi and I will be here when you wake up." Erwin gave a reassuring smile, holding the blanket up for Faye to slide under. "We're not going anywhere for the night." He waited for the medic to situate herself before he tucked her in with a soft smile. "We'll talk more about it when we get back."

*

"Al', you're going to be fine," The medic assured, safely tucking Beef into Alexander's arms. "You've practised this on oranges, you know the steps, and worst comes to worst, Levi can help guide you."

"But what if I forget, or what if all these people die because I'm not good enough?" Alex's hold on Beef tightened for a fraction of a second, his face paling. "I'm not like you, Faye. I don't know the ins and outs of being a doctor. I never- I've only ever watched you treat other people." He was panicking, his face had gone white, his hands were a little shaky, and his voice went up a few octaves.

"Relax," The brunette jumped off the wagon, dusting her hands off. "If there are a lot of people who are injured, you can always just help direct them to the hospital. You're not obligated to save them all." She let a heartbeat pass before she added, "Besides, your first priority is Humanity's Grumpiest. Just make sure Levi doesn't get into any trouble, and I'll consider this mission a success."

"You're sure I can't just go with you and Mike?" He bit his lip, trying his best not to show just how shaken up he was about leaving Faye again. "I don't like leaving you alone..."

"This is good practise for you," The doctor wasn't budging in the slightest. "This is going to help prepare you for the next expedition without plunging you into all the blood and carnage head first." She made up her mind ages ago, and in Faye's opinion, this was a good learning curve for the boy. He was weak stomached, and if he went on an expedition without any preparation, he wasn't going to make it. "Just take a few deep breaths if you decide to help someone, and Levi said he'll help you however he can."

"He did?" Alexander smally asked, brows raised with a hopeful attitude.

"No."

"You could have at least lied," Alexander's head shot to the side, regarding Humanity's Strongest with a scowl.

"Alright, alright," Faye cut into the pair's spat. They weren't going to last the day if they kept grating on eachother's nerves like this. "Levi, it's not like you have anything better to do. You're there as a last resort, right?"

"Piss off, you sh*tty doctor," Levi grumbled, quickly averting his gaze. He stepped onto the wagon to take his seat next to Alexander. It was like that night on the roof, he couldn't even look Faye in the eye without blushing. "He's got all the training he needs for this, so it's not like I can help him."

Faye's lips twitched. "Was that a compliment?" She teased, noting the faint blush creeping onto Levi's cheeks. "In any case, Al' probably just needs reassurement." Her gaze landed back on the boy, and she gave a toothy grin, "Just remember to take your time, take nice, deep breaths, and don't let yourself panic. You're going to do just fine."

"Oranges aren't the same as a real person, Faye," Alexander hissed. "What if I hurt them? What if I screw it all up? What if-"

"What if you do just fine?" The doctor countered. "Remember, if you're not comfortable treating someone, you can always just direct them to a hospital. You've got no obligation to do anything, and there's nothing to feel guilty over." She heard Erwin start his instructional speech, meaning she needed to wrap the conversation up quickly. "Listen, it's almost time for you guys to depart-"

"You're going to be there when we get back, right?" Al' sucked in a deep breath, meeting Faye's eyes head on. "I don't think I could take it if you died while I wasn't there."

"I'm going to be just fine, Al'," Faye assured with a warm smile. "It's just a bunch of kids, and Erwin is 90% sure he's got the right culprit. Don't worry about me."

"Faye," The lanky boy hesitantly started, "You're my best friend."

"I know," She smiled. "Please just be safe. You guys are in more danger than I am."

Levi's guts lurched as the carriage started forward. He couldn't put his finger on it, but something about separating from Faye made him uncomfortable, and it wasn't just because of the attraction he currently felt for her.

"I love you!" Alexander hollered, cupping his mouth to make the sound carry.

"I'll see you when you get back!" Faye waited for the wagon to turn the corner before she let the grin drop. Alexander was about to be faced with the destruction a titan possessed, and all she could do was hope that he would make it out safely. The only reason he was going was because she needed someone to keep an eye on Levi to make sure he wasn't being stupid with his leg.

"They'll be fine," Mike's hand clamped down onto Faye's shoulder, "Erwin said he's purposefully keeping Levi out of the line of fire, so they're hopefully going to be far enough away from the Female Titan that they won't have to engage."

"Yeah," The doctor murmured. "I hope you're right."

"Come on, the horses are waiting, and the base is a few hours away," Mike tugged on her shoulder, guiding her to the stables. "Are you worried we've got the titan?" The woman's frown made Mike’s stomach uneasily turn. Typically, she couldn't stop joking around and grinning.

"Armin's a smart kid, I don't think he would have suggested Annie unless he was certain," Faye sighed. "I'm more worried that I'm not going to be there when all the destruction goes down. There are going to be a lot of injured civilians, and Al' has never worked on a real patient before when they've got life threatening wounds."

"He'll be okay," Mike reiterated. “He’s not going to be leaving Erwin’s side. The man is a powerhouse- more than Levi and I.”

“He is?” Faye’s brows shot up in surprise. She supposed she never saw him on the field before, but it made sense. The man had muscles for days, so it was safe to assume he kept himself in shape.

“He stopped Levi’s blade with his bare hands a few years ago,” The lanky squad leader shrugged, as though it were an every day occurrence. “If Levi’s out of commission, Erwin would step up to keep him and Alexander safe. I’m sure of it.” He waited for Faye to enter the stable before he followed. “Have some faith in us.”

Faye gently guided Chicken out of his stall, “In the meantime, what are we going to do with all the kids?”

“They’ve got a few free days,” Mike was right behind Faye, grounding his foot in the holster before he pulled himself onto the horse. “We’re just making sure none of them get into any trouble, so it’s a pretty easy job.”

“They’re going to get bored,” The medic grunted, swinging her leg over Chicken’s back before she settled into the saddle. “We’re not bringing any entertainment for them? Nothing?”

“They’ve got each other,” Mike shrugged. “They’ll make do.”

Chapter 20: 16. Breached! Wall Rose

Chapter Text

Just south of Wall Sina sat one of the Scouting Regiment’s bases, tucked away in the rolling plains within the walls and bustling with young recruits and their superiors. The sun beat down in all its early morning glory, already high in the sky despite only being half-past seven. The breeze provided some sense of relief, but it came and went too quickly to provide any remission from the scorching temperature.

A short brunette stood with a lanky man in the cool shade of the stables, hiding away from their duties for a moment of respite. The shorter of the pair sat next to her horse, feeding it grain out of the palm of her hand every so often, while the taller gentleman leaned against a wooden frame, leisurely taking in the calmness of the morning.

“I should have asked Levi for some of his tea,” Faye sighed, holding her hand out to the horse. “How come no one told me you guys only have B-grade tea?” The topic should have come up a lot sooner, considering the brunette used to own a tea shop.

“We don’t really have the funding,” Mike explained. “The government equips us with the bare necessities and expects us to deal with it.”

The medic’s nose scrunched in distaste, a small scowl adorning her lips. “That’s stupid, given the fact that we’re the regiment who actually needs the money.” The horse lapped at her empty palm, beckoning her for more grain. “I don’t know why the Military Police are the richest out of us all, but they get off doing virtually nothing.”

“Beats me,” The lanky squad leader gave a one-shouldered shrug, “They’re supposed to be protectors of the peace, but honestly, all I’ve ever seen them do is sit on their asses while criminals run around.”

“I wonder why Nile Dok hates me so much,” Faye’s brows furrowed in concentration, pulling her hand out of the grain bin to hold for her horse again. “I don’t think I’ve ever been outwardly rude to him-”

“He stands for justice,” Mike cut in, meeting Faye’s eyes with a pointed frown. “It’s not that you were rude to him, it’s that you’re a criminal he’s been tracking for the last decade, and now that you’ve been exposed, you’re getting off scot-free.”

Faye hummed, “It’s about his pride then.” Really, there couldn’t be any other explanation, and men were often found defensive when their dignity was on the line; the medic knew the feeling well- maybe a little too well. “I wonder who tipped him off about me.”

“How do you know it wasn’t me?” The squad leader raised a brow, dutifully hiding the teasing smile that pulled at his lips. “I threatened you with that the first time we met, remember?”

“Please. You and I both know you would never have turned someone who saved your life in.” The brunette snorted.

“How would you know?”

“I saw it in your eyes,” She knew it sounded corny, but the truth often did. “You’re a big softie.”

“Really?” Mike’s lips twitched, “Usually, people say I look almost as menacing as Levi.” His chest warmed at the thought; it was a pleasant surprise to know he wasn’t as daunting as he thought he looked.

“Sure, you’ve got a glare that could scare the piss out of titans,” Faye casually conceded, “But you don’t hold a candle to Humanity’s Grumpiest. You smile a lot more, and you’ve got a sense of humor the general population can actually understand.” She closed the grain bin - much to Chicken’s disappointment- and grinned, “Don’t sell yourself short, Mike. You’ve got a lot of great attributes I’m sure Nanaba would agree with.

“Nanaba?” Mike stuttered, his cheeks tinged pink. “What-what does she have to do with any of this?” The man nearly stumbled over his own two feet when Faye stood to her full height and started to stroll down the stables towards the exit.

“Oh, you know,” She raised her brows as her lips curled up in a knowing smile, eying the squad leader. “Because you guys are dating.”

The hair on the nape of Mike’s neck stood on end. His lips opened and closed a few times, trying to search for words, and his legs remained immobile, dooming him to stay glued to his spot at the threshold of the stables.

“Erwin told me, so don’t get your panties in a twist,” Faye snickered, stretching her arms out as she continued dawdling. “You guys are cute. You suit each other.”

"Wait a second," Inwardly, Mike cussed Erwin Smith out with every profanity he knew. The nerve of outting his relationship… He had a whole plan for how he wanted to tell Faye, and The Commander ruined it because he harbored a penchant for gossiping like a teenaged girl. "When did he tell you?"

"Like," She squinted, trying to think back. "The day he took me to Levi's base."

Mike couldn't bring himself to say anything more about the situation. This was a topic he would need to bring up with his commander and thoroughly cuss him out in person.

“This weather is unbelievable, jeez.” She stepped into the sunlight, frowning at the impossible heat beating down on her shoulders.

“Your cloak would have helped shade you,”

“It’s covered in blood.”

The mood dampened considerably, like an overhanging cloud loomed just above Faye’s head, mercilessly drenching her in a sudden depression. The change happened so quickly; Mike struggled to discern why the brunette’s mood took a plunge.

Reality hit Mike like a ton of bricks. He opened his lips to utter out a simple, “Oh.” Really, what more could he say in response? Faye lost the teammates she lived with for an entire month straight, and he doubted the death took a light toll on her mind.

“I’ll give you my cloak, then,” The squad leader couldn’t really stand to see Faye so glum; it pulled at his heartstrings to the point that he nearly keeled over in pain. “You shouldn’t have to bear this alone.” He waited for Faye’s lips to curve into a meek smile before he continued, “I’ll meet you in the dining hall. You should probably check on the recruits. I’ll bet they’re going stir-crazy.”

“Roger that,” Faye gave a mock salute before she spun on her heel, the small tilt of her lips dissipating within the second. Acting like she was okay took a lot of energy, and she still had at least a day and a half before Levi and Erwin started to circle back for her.

And Alexander…

Faye sincerely hoped the boy behaved himself and refrained from commenting on Levi and Erwin’s bodies. Objectifying The Commander and Captain wouldn’t end well for him, especially if they heard the words straight from his lips. Yikes… He would come home black and blue, and he’d have to sit yet another expedition out.

Then Faye needed to worry about Alexander’s ability to treat patients. Sure, she made him practice his suture skills on an orange, and she walked him through the process of cauterizing wounds and dressing them properly, but it wasn’t the same as real-life experience. Not to mention Alexander had a pretty weak stomach to begin with, and Faye couldn’t imagine him keeping a level head when faced with so much blood…

Levi said he would help him, but still… Humanity’s Strongest could only do so much with the negligible medical skills he possessed in the face of life-threatening wounds. Not to mention that they possessed limited supplies.

Maybe Faye really did make a mistake in sending Alexander to watch over Levi…

“Hey, Captain Faye, over here!” A sunny blonde waved from her spot with a cheerful smile curved on her lips.

Krista Lenz - affectionately dubbed the 104th’s “Goddess.”

Now, it wasn’t that Faye didn’t like Krista - No, not at all - in fact, it seemed to be quite the opposite. Krista was well mannered, made it a point to put others before herself, never gave her superiors any grief, made sure to keep Ymir (Her very sarcastic - but loveable- friend -maybe lover? Faye hadn’t quite figured that part out yet ) In check. She was the perfect poster girl for the 104th Training Corps.

See, the problem laid in the uncanny resemblance Krista bore to Dina Fritz. A figure of Faye’s past she would have been okay to forget about. Every time the captain looked at Krista, her eyes automatically lightened the hair and darkened the eye color before aging the teenager a few years - leaving Faye to stare at her mother’s look alike. Needless to say, it felt like hell.

“Hey, kiddo,” The captain forced a grin on her lips as she took a seat next to Ymir. “What’re you guys up to?”

“More like what we aren’t up to,” Ymir grumbled. “We’ve been cooped up in this building for the last day. When the hell are we going to leave?” Her fingers drummed on the table impatiently while she pursed her lips. “Are you going to give us any answers, or are you going to act like every other f*cker-”

“Ymir!” Krista gasped, leaning over the table to clutch onto her friend’s (Lover’s?) hand.

“I’m under orders,” Faye apologetically smiled. “It’s on a need-to-know basis, and you guys didn’t make the cut.”

“And Armin and Horse-Face did?” Ymir scowled.

“We just got back from an expedition,” The medic reminded. “You should relax while you still have the time. Pretty soon, Erwin and your squad leaders are going to have you kids running drills day in and day out.” She knew the sympathy in her voice reached their ears, but she also knew that it wasn’t exactly fair to them to be cooped up inside the dining room for sixteen hours a day.

“Well, how come we’re not allowed to wear our uniforms? Or train to pass the time?” Ymir pressed. “You’re armed to the teeth, and we’re defenseless, so how does that make any sense?”

“Ymir, really,” Krista’s hand gently squeezed Ymir’s in a silent plea for her to stop pushing the subject. “Maybe Captain Faye is right; we should be enjoying the downtime while we still have it.”

“She’s got a gun, Krista,” Ymir’s patience thinned with each passing second. “Do you really think Captain Faye would need a gun if this really were a break?”

“Consider it a perk of being a captain,” Faye’s eyes narrowed at Ymir, leveling her with a pointed stare as if to stave off her inevitable frustration. “I’m not here to execute you. I’m here to make sure you’re safe.” Slowly but surely, Faye could see the metaphorical cogs spinning inside the teenager’s brain.

“Who are you protecting us from, then?”

“Classified,” Faye leaned back in her chair in a casual pose. “What I can tell you is that-”

“Uh, guys?” Sasha’s voice held urgency and panic as she addressed the room. “I think I’m hearing footsteps.”

“Knock it off, Sasha,” Reiner’s face went stony. “So what, you’re trying to tell us titans are here?” He clenched his jaw, steeling himself as he continued. “Come on, that would only be possible if Wall Rose had fallen.”

The hair on the nape of Faye’s neck stood on end as she frowned. She didn’t know Sasha very well - but from what she could tell, the recruit wasn’t the type to lie about something so dire.

“You kids stay here,” Faye murmured. “I’m going to double-check with Mike.” Her feet carried her out the door in an orderly fashion, but the second she turned the corner, the captain bolted through the front door.

“Hey,” Faye’s gear pulled her up the tower to stand next to Mike, Nanaba, and Tomas. “Sasha said she heard titans. I need a confirmation on that.”

Wordlessly, Mike handed his cloak over to Faye as he stepped forward, sniffing the air.

“Tomas, ride out of here, take three couriers, and notify the districts.” His voice held no amusem*nt as he continued to watch the rolling plains to the south.

“Mike,” Faye tugged on his sleeve, lowering her voice. “The odds of one of these kids being one is low. We need to get them to safety.” She knew he had reached the same conclusion, but it didn’t hurt to voice her opinion all the same.

“We’ve got multiple titans incoming from the south.” Mike’s hand balled into a tight fist as he continued. “Wall Rose has been compromised.” His eyes narrowed as he took in another whiff, “Nanaba, gather the recruits. The titans are about 500 meters to the south. There’s no time.”

Nanaba didn’t even wait to nod or acknowledge Mike; she jumped off the ledge in a rush, letting her gear do all the work for her.

“Faye, you’re with me.”

“Like I would have it any other way,” Faye scoffed, following Mike as he descended towards the stables. “You sure you don’t want your cloak back?” She got to work on putting the saddle on her horse, practically mirroring Mike in the other stall.

“No. The breeze is picking up, and you never got that jacket replacement,” He grunted, sniffing the air again. “You mind finishing my horse? I’m going to check on the titans; they’re closing in at a breakneck pace.”

“Yeah, I’ll meet you out there.” She didn’t bother looking up. Mike was an adult, and he could handle himself just fine. Instead, Faye focused on tightening the straps on Chicken and Mike’s horse, making sure they were all secure before she double-checked the saddlebags, which were all filled with medical supplies.

The recruits all filed in to start on their own horses just as Faye started to leave the stables. The steps were uncoordinated and anxious, teetering from one side to the other as they fumbled with the saddles.

“Reiner, Bertholdt,” Faye’s arm darted out to gently hold the latter’s elbow - much like Levi typically did to her. “I need you guys to keep an eye on everyone.” She could practically see the confusion and panic swimming in Bertholdt’s eyes, so in a softer tone, she continued, “You guys are the oldest. Just make sure you guys aren’t doing anything dangerous, do you understand?”

The gesture made Reiner’s head throb, though he nodded through the pain. He wasn’t really sure what it was about Faye that screamed at him that she was dangerous, but every time she spoke, the hair on his arms stood.

“Yeah,” The blond nodded. “Don’t worry about us. We’re warriors at heart.”

Everyone else fell into the distance as Faye froze, lips curling down as she stared at Reiner. Her spine was tingling, and her tongue felt like it was two sizes too big for her mouth, impeding her ability to swallow. Her heart thudded against her ribcage as her lungs contracted in a near painful squeeze.

“What...did you just say?” Her voice had gone flat, fingers twitching - begging - her to pull her rifle up to aim it at one of the boys.

“He said we’re soldiers at heart,” Bertholdt stuttered, a sheen of sweat developing on his temple.

“Faye! We need to move out!” Mike barked from a nearby rooftop.

The doctor needed to make a decision, and she needed to make it immediately. Detaining the pair would mean finding a safe place where the incoming titans couldn’t reach and then somehow ensuring they couldn’t hurt themselves to transform. Not to mention that Faye would need to explain the entire situation to Mike since the squad leader was completely in the dark about everything, which would no doubt lead to questions Faye just… couldn’t answer without Levi and Erwin present.

“Reiner, Bertholdt,” Faye released her hold on the blond’s elbow, taking a small step backward. “We’ll discuss this when we aren’t all in danger.” Her eyes flickered between the two menacingly. “You hurt any of these kids, and you’ll be answering directly to me. Do you understand?”

“Captain Faye?” Bertholdt wiped his sweaty palms against his pants. “We’re not-it’s not what it looks like.”

“Yeah?” She pinned the lanky teenager with a hard glare. “You’re candidates from Marley, sent to infiltrate The Walls. What part am I misunderstanding?”

Reiner and Bertholdt shared a worried glance. This was uncharted territory for the both of them, neither had expected to be found out.

“I’m sure you heard my name being passed around while you were still in Marley” The medic watched the recognition dawn on them in a pitiful manner. Faye let a slow heartbeat pass before she switched tactics. She might have been shorter than both teenagers, but it did nothing to lessen the terror she instilled within them. Her tone lowered dangerously, the cooling breeze passing straight through the two men. “You’re looking at the kid who massacred an entire fleet single-handedly when she was seven. Now imagine what I can do as a twenty-five-year-old.”

They were paling at her words, Bertholdt’s hands started to quiver, and Reiner’s chest kept rising and falling rapidly.

“I mean it when I tell you to behave. I’ll hunt you down, and I’ll gut you like I did the fleet.”

It seemed John Orwell did have his uses in telling Faye just how revered she was in Marley. Her name ingrained heart-wrenching horror in the candidates before her - completely unaware of how dishonest her last statement was. She’d never even laid a finger on the fleet; it was all Eren Kruger. But they didn’t need to know that.

“Yes-yes, Captain Jaeger,” Bertholdt stammered, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly. “We’ll- I swear. We won’t-”

“Reiner,” Faye addressed, watching his back stiffen under the heavy weight of his childhood hero. “I want your word.”

“Yeah-yes. Of course. We’ll-we’ll halt the mission until you get back.” Reiner couldn’t remember the last time he found himself this sweaty. The air had gone stale, and his tongue had gone dry as he waited for Faye to respond.

“Get going, then.”

Bertholdt didn’t need to be told twice, grabbing Reiner’s hand and scrambling away with the bulky teenager in tow.

Faye rolled her eyes at how gullible they were and started forward. Talk about being drama queens; when she was in the program, she was prepared to die for the cause. Then again, Faye also believed she had the entire future of the Eldians riding on her back, so maybe she couldn’t really compare herself to them.

The medic took in a shaky breath while she spun on her heel. ‘There’s nothing I can do right now,’ She told herself. ‘The titans are gaining on us, and if I keep them here, we’ll all die.’

“What was that about with those kids?” Mike lifted himself onto the saddle of his horse with ease, watching as Faye did the same. “They looked like they were ready to piss themselves.”

“I was just asking them to look out for the other recruits, that’s all,” Faye dismissively waved her hand in the air, as though the question were trivial and not worth their time. “Are we ready to head out?”

Mike gave a nod before he cantered back to address the recruits, leaving Faye to button his cloak up.

The horses galloped at a breakneck speed, the recruits, and soldiers riding as one large group. Faye kept close to Mike in case things went awry - especially with the two candidates. Their main priority was making it out of this mess alive, though.

“The second the titans reach the woods, we’ll split up,” Mike barked, the wind carrying his words to the rest of his soldiers. “I want four separate teams, recruits and soldiers alike in each unit.” He didn’t miss a beat in his orders, apparently having come up with a plan in the five minutes since he first sniffed the titans out. “When I give the signal, we’ll scatter in different directions simultaneously. Get the word out to civilians and do not engage the enemy.” His instructions were clear and direct, a feat Faye certainly appreciated. “Which one of you is most familiar with the area?”

“Uh, me!” Sasha raised her hand without hesitation. “Sir, my hometown is just to the north of here. I know this region like the back of my hand.” Truly, Sasha was an excellent soldier if Faye had ever seen one, a little green, but she had a lot of potential. “Connie too. Go on, tell him.” She glanced over to look at Connie’s dread-filled expression, and Sasha’s lips thinned. “What’s wrong?”

“My village...” Connie swallowed, eyes wide with anxiety. “My village is to the south.”

Faye’s heart plummeted, sympathy filling her very soul for the boy. He was no doubt worried about his family if that were the case.

“That’s where the titans are coming from. I can lead you to nearby settlements, but afterward...” Connie trailed off uneasily, trying to choose his course of action carefully. “Let me go home. Please.”

“That’s fine with us, right, Mike?” Faye asked, trying to throw the boy a bone.

“Very well,” Mike nodded, agreeing with his fellow captain. “Guide the southern team and then go to your village.”

“I’ll come with you,” Reiner offered, all too aware of the pair of eyes blatantly narrowing at him from the head of the small group.

“What?” Connie frowned, “No. You’re crazy. They’ll be everywhere.”

“Reiner,” Faye called over her shoulder. “Remember my orders from earlier.”

“I was going to help him get home anyway,” Reiner shouted back, meeting the captain’s eyes. “It’s not safe for him to go alone.” His fists had started to shake around the reins in his grip from the sinister stare he was receiving. Zeke didn’t even intimidate Reiner this badly, and he was- well- sort of a loose cannon…

“Take Bertholdt with you then,” Faye decided. “He’s the more level-headed out of you two, and he’ll help keep you balanced.” It was more for her sake than anyone else's. If Reiner and Bertholdt didn’t listen, it would only be one kid in the line of fire vs. the entire 104th corps, and if they did behave, then Faye could sit them down and have a civilized conversation with them.

“As you have guessed, today marks the darkest hour in humanity’s history,” Nanaba spoke up, voice grave. “Look sharp. If ever we needed to give our all, that time is now. Don’t lose heart.”

Yeah, with Mike’s decisive decision-making skills, and Nanaba’s motivational speeches, the two made a power couple.

“They’ve reached the woods!” Gelgar notified. “The enemy is on top of us.”

“Scatter, now!” Mike’s voice went gravelly as the soldiers heeded his orders. “Ride for everything you’re worth!”

Faye observed the titans owlishly, taking in the way they stopped for half a second before swinging into action, running towards the group with fervent hunger. The horses were already galloping at full speed, but the titans had already started gaining on them.

“Mike,” Faye called. “We need to bait them.”

The medic was already veering off from the group when Mike shouted the order for Gelgar to take over the southern team. The titans hadn’t slowed, but they had definitely noticed her approaching them.

“Your solo kills are a little lacking right now,” The squad leader hollered. Mike was behind one of them faster than Faye could blink, slicing into their nape before he sent a smug smirk down, egging her on.

“You shepherd dog,” Faye muttered, letting her body get pulled into the air, words getting lost in the wind. “I’ve only been on one expedition. Give me a little time.”

She only hoped things were panning out better for Erwin, Levi, and Alexander…

*

Alexander Ral didn’t know much about Erwin Smith-really, he just knew the basics. The tall blond was handsome, he had a nice ass, he dressed nicely when out of uniform, his eyes were pretty, and he had the jawline of a model.

What he hadn’t expected was for Erwin Smith to be completely insane. Easy on the eyes - but absolutely out of his mind.

“I’m sorry,” Al’ ran a hand through his hair for what felt like the thousandth time. “You guys think little Armin Arlert is going to be able to lure- f*ck, what was her name again? Anna?”

“Annie.”

“Right, right. Annie.” Like the name made any difference. “Anyways, you really think Armin is going to be able to lure Annie into the tunnel?” Incredulous laughter bubbled in the pits of Alexander’s stomach. “The kid is barely taller than Faye- and that’s saying something.”

“He’s the best shot we’ve got,” Erwin’s resolution stayed steadfast as he cantered his horse forward. “I’m more worried about Nile and the Military Police. I doubt they’re going to let us go so easily - especially not when Jean is revealed to be a decoy.”

“We’ll deal with it when we jump off that bridge,” Levi pinched the bridge of his nose, leaning back into the wall on the wagon, which jostled his body like a slab of meat. The longer he sat and listened to Alexander blather away, the more Levi felt like dangling the boy over a titans jaw, and Erwin wasn’t helping quiet him down. “For now, just focus on getting through the gate and shutting up.”

The gate was already in sight, so it was only a matter of minutes before they reached Stohess, which begged Alexander to question why Humanity’s Strongest was acting like he still had a stick shoved up his ass.

“All due respect, Captain Levi,” Al’ sassily started, “All you’ve done this entire time is complain, complain complain,” The boy was too busy picking at the dirt under his nails to notice the intense glare he was receiving via the short captain. “Honestly, you’re downing the whole mood. Things are about to get depressing enough as is- especially if this doesn’t go according to plan, and-”

“Levi,” Erwin’s voice cut through Alexander’s; he wore a stern frown, shaking his head. “Faye wouldn’t be pleased if her lieutenant returned with broken fingers.”

“Broken?!” Alexander hissed, cradling his hands to his chest as though he’d been burned. His brows shot to his hairline as he regarded Levi. He jeered his head back, realizing the violent, metaphorical daggers sent to his forehead by none other than Captain Levi. “Broken?” He repeated, a little louder. “I’ll have you know that the only reason I’m even here is to look after your ass.”

Air shot through Levi’s nose as he snorted at the outlandish boy, who dared raise his voice at Humanity’s Strongest. Just because he let Faye get away with calling him on his bullsh*t did not mean he took kindly to Alexander copying her. While the boy was certainly just as blunt as Faye, the words didn’t sound as pretty or appealing coming from the Ral sibling.

“Stable duty.” The words were swift and merciless, even in the face of Alexander’s dropped jaw. “Two weeks.”

“What-”

“A month,” Levi interrupted again.

“You’re not even my captain-”

“A month and a half,” Humanity’s Strongest could keep going all day. “And you’ll be cleaning Hange’s research lab once a week.” Maybe he couldn’t dish out physical discipline like he wanted to, but menial tasks were just as pesky. Levi knew from first-hand experience.

Alexander sputtered, a growl vibrating in the back of his throat. Sometimes, Captain Levi was so-so- infuriating . He had no clue how Faye put up with his snobby and reserved attitude - especially not when he was so unreasonable.

“If Faye were here, she wouldn’t have stood for this.” Alexander crossed his arms, lips pursing as he averted his gaze.

“You’re right,” Erwin acknowledged. “She would have stepped in like she always does to save you.” He saw the shock registering on the youngest Ral’s face, but it made no difference to The Commander, and he continued ripping down the ego Alexander had built over the years. “You’re young, and you haven’t learned when to keep your thoughts to yourself yet, which leaves Faye to constantly run after you before you can say something that’ll get you in trouble.”

“Yeah, but-”

“But what?” Levi’s eyes narrowed as he challenged Alexander. “You think it’s fair to make your captain cover for your own arrogance and stupidity? Faye has better things to do than make sure you’re not getting yourself in sh*t with that big mouth of yours.”

“You’re Faye’s lieutenant,” Erwin reminded. “You should be the one helping her, not the other way around.”

Alexander huffed out a sigh, “She doesn’t like the help.” The words were helpless, strangled against his throat as he clenched his fists. It was all he could do to keep the raw emotions squeezing inside his chest from manifesting physically.

“Because you don’t know how to help her,” The Commander’s voice was hard as he stared forward. “Think, Alexander. In all your years of knowing Faye, has she ever allowed herself to lean on you emotionally?”

The youngest Ral sibling couldn’t bring himself to comment, and he chose to resolutely grit his teeth and let Commander Smith’s words reverberate inside his head.

The overarching gateway gave a rusty screech as the mechanisms inside grinded. Garrison soldiers manned the rotating levers while the Military Police bustled, positioning themselves to escort Eren Jaeger through Stohess and into Mitras.

“Nile,” Erwin’s face contorted into a pleasant smile as he shook the dark-haired man’s hand. Niceties were the man’s forté, and holding public relations while playing the game called ‘Politics ’ was Commander Erwin’s bread and butter - a facade he put on without thinking about it. “I hope Marie is doing well.”

“She’s fine,” Nile brusquely stated. The Commander of the Military Police eyed the carriages and wagons with a deep-set frown. “Where’s the criminal?”

“I'm right here,” Levi rolled his shoulders back as he hopped off the wagon - much to Alexander’s disapproval- “Or are you referring to our newest addition, Captain Faye Jaeger?” It was easy to see just how deep under Nile’s skin Levi was, especially now that the dark-haired man was outwardly glaring at the short captain.

“You know who I meant,” Commander Dok growled. “I’ve got a warrant to detain her, so where the hell is she?”

“A warrant?” Alexander’s head spun from how fast he stood up. “What did she do?” If there were ever a time to panic, now would definitely be it.

“She’s with Mike, watching over our newest recruits,” Erwin cut in, a polite, guarded curve on his lips. “I’ll send for her when Eren reaches The Capital.” His hand clamped down on his fellow commander’s shoulder in what he hoped was a friendly gesture. “If I had known you wanted to detain her, I would have ensured she was with us. My apologies.”

Levi’s eyes narrowed at the interaction. Nile was a fool if he actually believed Erwin’s words. It was no wonder he was so steadfast in his decision to keep Faye with Mike - the cheeky bastard knew Commander Dok would take advantage of Faye being in town, and he would want to interrogate her - no doubt about her dealings with criminals during her days as an illicit doctor.

“I’ll inform Premier Zachary,” Nile was quick to spin on his heel, bellowing commands at his soldiers before the convoys started the journey through Stohess. He was oblivious to the cloaked scouts parting way with the wagons, scouring off into the shadows of the alleyways.

“What the hell is Commander Dok trying to pin Faye for this time?” Alexander hissed into Levi’s ear. He was teetering from foot to foot, having joined the small group on foot rather than stew away in the wagon.

“Doesn’t matter. What matters is that she’s safe for the time being.” Levi shot back. “Now shut the hell up and act natural before you blow our cover.”

Erwin strolled with Nile, casually discussing which carriage held Eren and which carriages held artillery and weaponry, easily distracting him from the fact that the titan shifter had fled the second they stepped into Stohess.

“How is your ankle doing?” In all honesty, Alexander didn’t give two sh*ts, but if Faye wanted the boy to mind Captain Levi’s ankle, he was going to do his best to ensure Humanity’s Strongest didn’t screw his leg up more than it already was.

“Fine.”

“Okay, see, you say that you’re fine,” Al’ sarcastically started. “But Faye said you should really try to stay off your leg, so maybe you should sit down and rest it,” He tried to keep his suggestion lighthearted and well-meaning, but Captain Levi’s dour mood made it increasingly hard for Alexander to understand why Faye even put up with the guy.

“I said it’s fine.”

“She’s going to be pissed when you come back with a swollen ankle,” Maybe, deep, deep down, Alexander found pleasure in taunting Humanity’s Strongest. “And you know who she’s going to blame?” He let a heartbeat pass before he continued, “Me. Captain Faye is going to blame me. And you know who I’m going to blame? You.”

“So do it and be done with it, you sh*tty lieutenant,” Levi scowled.

“I wish one of those plates landed,” Al’ muttered under his breath. “At least then I would have gotten a decent hit on you, you asshole.”

“You’re not going to last in the military with that attitude.”

Alexander swiveled around in open-mouthed horror to look at Hange, who was grinning from ear to ear at the boy. He had minimal contact with the bizarre section commander, and truth be told, they gave him the heebie-jeebies. He couldn’t quite place his finger on why Hange made the hair on his neck stand, but they incited a visceral, knee-jerk reaction that begged for him to put some distance between himself and the mad scientist.

“Shorty here’ll kill you.” They swung an arm around Levi’s shoulders in a lazy display of - sh*t; Alexander couldn’t quite tell. Maybe it was… Affection? “And he won’t hesitate to carve you up like a titan on Thanksgiving.”

The words went in one ear and out the other as Alexander stared, trying to think of something to say.

“You punched Faye…”

Hange squinted, amused by how timid Alexander Ral had gone when he had been arguing with Humanity’s Strongest, who - arguably - was a hell of a lot scarier than Hange was.

“He’s supposed to be Pint-Sized’s assistant?” Hange whispered, leaning into Levi’s ear while they raised a brow. “I thought she was smart, so why’s Ral so slow on the upkeep?”

Levi twisted himself out of Hange’s arms with a scowl, taking a step back to establish some much-needed distance.

“Pint-Sized?” The short captain repeated with an unimpressed tone. “That’s your sh*tty nickname for Faye, Four-Eyes?”

“Like you could come up with anything better,” Hange retorted. “It’s always sh*tty-Doctor this, and sh*tty-Doctor that. She’s the best damn doctor either of us has ever met.” The incredulous tone they sported drove home how unbelievable and cynical Levi acted - even in the presence of people who considered him their friend. “You should try to find something a little more accurate.”

“f*ck off, sh*tty-Glasses-”

“See?!” Hange’s arm swung out to point an accusatory finger at Levi. “There you go. Even ‘sh*tty-Glasses’ is more accurate than sh*tty-Doctor.”

Alexander started to slow his pace, eager to separate from the grumpy captain and bat-sh*t crazy section commander. Hange’s energy was a little too much - even for him. He was subtle about it, casually inching further and further away.

“Hey! I wanted to ask you about Faye,” Hange’s eyes glinted in a near dangerous way, “You’ve known her the longest, right?” They were bouncing from foot to foot, a stark contrast to the menacing grin they wore.

Alexander didn’t dare answer. From what he understood, Hange was looking to latch onto whatever information they could find on Faye, and if he could help it, he wanted to keep her life private.

Hange let an irritated huff escape their lips. “Fine, what do you know about Grisha Jaeger?”

“Let it go, Four-Eyes,” Levi grabbed Hange by the scruff of their collar, dragging them away from Alexander. “Faye didn’t want to talk then, and her lieutenant has balls of steel. You’re not getting any info from Ral.”

Al’s lips opened and closed a few times, trying to think of something — anything — to say. Had he heard Humanity’s Strongest correctly? Had the man just… complimented him? sh*t, Levi must have bumped his head or something when he hurt his leg because there was absolutely no way in hell Levi made the conscious decision to praise Alexander Ral on his balls of steel.

Like he would know anything about them.

Alexander couldn’t make out what Levi muttered out to Hange when the deafening crashes sounded out. He had seen his lips move in his peripherals, but he was too busy gawking at the smoke billowing into the sky and the shrieks of terror piercing through the air.

“Escort squad, have a look.” Nile Dok barked, expression souring. “I’ll hold position here.” A bead of sweat dribbled down his temple while her fists clenched. It didn’t take a genius to see the man was nervous.

“Nile, deploy all troops immediately.” Erwin’s eyes narrowed, though he remained outwardly unbothered. “We should assume that a titan has already appeared.”

“Are you out of your mind? This is Wall Sina,” Nile snapped, sending a dirty look at his fellow commander. “There’s no way a titan would just suddenly show up here.”

Alexander’s eyes nearly bulged out of his skull at how incredulous The Commander of the Military Police sounded. How absolutely brainless he was — and that was saying something considering Al’ wasn’t exactly the sharpest tool in the box.

“What? Just like Wall Maria and Trost?”

Silence swept over the commanders and Humanity’s Strongest as they all turned to Alexander. The words were an honest mistake, having forgotten how to hold his tongue in the face of superiors.

“Who is this kid, Erwin?” Nile didn’t look at all pleased with the blatant disregard for rank as commander, eyes flashing dangerously.

“He’s a mouthy brat,” Levi acknowledged, glaring up at Alexander. “Who can’t even be bothered to listen when his superiors try to talk some sense into him.” Oh, if looks could kill, Al’ would have been flayed alive within the second.

“Who told you to move, Jaeger?” Soldiers flanked to the teenager’s side when he hopped out from the carriage with a scowl.

“How ‘bout this damn wig said I can, moron?” The teenager ripped the poorly made wig from his head, unveiling the dirty blond hair beneath. Silence rippled through the air as everyone stared, open-mouthed at Jean’s display, revealing that he was not, in fact, Eren Jaeger but a mere decoy. An actor. A normal boy with absolutely no titan shifting abilities. “Call me Jaeger again, and it’s your ass; you got that?”

Nile looked to be in shock, glancing between Jean and Erwin with an accusatory glare, as though he just couldn’t believe his eyes.

“Commander, what’s the plan?” Jean moved to salute Erwin, ignoring everyone else.

“Ask Squad Four for your equipment,” Erwin replied, watching as Jean buttoned his cloak before he saluted again.

“Like the brass balls, but try not to swing ‘em so hard they get you killed,” Levi added.

“Was that another balls of steel joke?” Alexander leaned down to ask, lips twitching up.

“You’re going to wish you had balls of steel if you sh*t something stupid out again.”

Okay, so Levi definitely wasn’t in the mood to joke around. Al’ could take a hint.

“Hold on, what the hell?” Nile tried to ask stupidly. He was sweating bullets, glancing between Erwin, Levi, and Alexander with vehement unintelligence. “What—”

“Commander,” Another scout zipped down from one of the rooftops, carrying a case that was opened to reveal ODM gear. They kneeled before Erwin, holding the case open while the blond started shrugging the gear on.

“Wait just a damn minute!”

“Alright, all of you, with me,” Erwin ordered, effectively ignoring Nile. “We’re rendezvousing with the Capture Squad.” He only took two steps before Nile exploded in a fit of unadulterated frustration.

“No!” The tall, dark-haired man cried, snatching a rifle from one of his men’s hands before he moved to block Erwin’s path. “The hell you will. This is outright treason.” The barrel of the rifle pushed against the blond's chest, right over where his heart was. The rest of Nile’s squad took aim, pointing at Levi and Alexander while they circled around, caging the three of them in. “I am well within my rights to shoot you where you stand.”

“Shoot?” Alexander gulped. “This wasn’t in my job description.”

“Think, Nile,” Levi advised, “I find it hard to believe you’re actually as thick-headed as you look.” If the captain saw Alexander swivel his head around to pin him with a dumb glare, he disregarded it easily. “You’re a hair-trigger away from making the biggest mistake of your life.”

“Take off the gear before I shoot you,” Nile looked frantic as he dug the rifle into Erwin’s chest.

“Hey, let’s all take a deep breath,” Alexander raised his hands in the air while he stepped forward, heart thundering in his chest. This was definitely a first for him, but he had watched Faye in a similar situation, and he hoped he exuded the confidence she often wore. “Killing Commander Smith is only going backfire on you.”

“How would you know?”

Alexander blinked, reciting word for word a sentence he had heard Faye use over the years. He had never really understood what she meant by the saying, but he figured it was worth a try.

“Because killing another human only results in useless hatred and bloodstained hands.”

Nile squinted his eyes as though Alexander were some sort of bizarre puzzle he couldn’t piece together.

“Sir!” A Garrison soldier flew to Nile’s side, saluting before he continued. “Reports indicate two titans are the source of all the commotion,” More soldiers were gathering, ready to shoot on Commander Dok’s order.

“We’ve got two of ‘em hashing it out on the streets?” That got Nile’s attention.

“The city is collapsing like a house of cards,” The soldier confessed, reeling their face back at the furious glint in Dok’s eyes.”It’s just… horrifying. We can only guess how many casualties...”

Casualties…

“sh*t, Faye is going to murder me, I gotta-” Al’ went to take a step forward, meaning to push his way out of the barricade of soldiers, but Levi held tightly to his elbow, forcing the boy to stay close to him.

“You can’t do anything for the dead. Stay here and don’t cause any trouble.”

“Erwin,” Nile growled, spinning on his heel to once again point the rifle towards Alexander’s commander. “Your arrogance has brought Hell right to our door.” Any village idiot could tell the man was bathing in hot fury.

Nile’s shoulders were tense - a lot tenser than Alexander could ever remember Faye’s being when she handled her rifle, and he furrowed his brows at how white his knuckles had gone. Sure, Al’ was by no means an expert, but from the times he went out to the shooting range with Faye, Commander Dok looked like a novice. His stance was all wrong, and the kickback from where he had the rifle positioned was going to leave a welt.

Shouldn’t the commander of the Military Police know how to handle a rifle?

“I know,” Erwin’s expression was grave while screams echoed in the distance. “I acted entirely on my own authority, and I offer no excuses.”

“You knew what this would do to us, you son of a bitch,” Nile’s hands worked quickly, pointing the rifle down and grabbing onto Erwin’s collar to drag him down to eye level. He looked ready to pop a blood vessel, and his hands started to visibly shake with rage. “You knew, and our lives be damned. Why? Damn you, why?!” He shook Erwin around, seething while he grit his teeth.

“For humanity,” Erwin calmly admitted. “For victory.”

“Don’t give me that!” Nile cried, once again pointing his rifle at Erwin. “You’re nothing but a traitor, and I ought to kill you right here and now. None of the higher-ups would fault me.”

Why did Nile Dok keep stalling? How many times was that now that he had pointed his rifle - incorrectly if Faye was modeling correct gunmanship - at Erwin? Three? And the number of death threats? If it were Faye, she would have only said it once and meant it.

“Do as your conscience dictates. My post is yours,” It was a wonder how Erwin kept his cool, despite having been threatened numerous times within the last five minutes. “The Female Titan must not escape. Deployment is through Peer, and Beirer is in command of Provisions. Work with them closely. Do whatever is required to ensure she doesn’t—”

“Shut up,” Nile hissed, the sweat on his forehead glistening in the low sun while his eyes held wide, panicked fear. “Do-do you really believe… this is for the good of us all?”

“I have faith it’s a step forward,” Erwin evaded.

Nile’s forehead creased, “Place this man under arrest,” his lips curled down while he slowly lowered the rifle yet again. “Deploy all troops immediately, and as of now, focus on evacuation.” His men had already started cuffing Alexander’s complacent commander. “Erwin, I hereby wash my hands of you and leave you to the high court.”

“I’ll accept their judgment, thank you, Nile.” Erwin’s head dipped down in thanks, “Levi, for now, stay here. A pointless death wouldn’t suit you.”

“No, I doubt it would any more than it suits anyone else.” Captain Levi’s words were monotonous as he watched Erwin get dragged off, leaving him and Alexander alone.

“I’m heading to the hospital to help,” Al decided. “Don’t screw your leg up, or Faye is going to have both of our heads skewered.”

“Getting ballsy,” Levi’s eyes narrowed while he shrugged his jacket off and reached into the carriage, pulling out his ODM gear. “That’s two months on stable duty.”

“Just you wait until Faye hears about this,” Al’ grumbled, spinning on his heel. “She’s going to rip you a new one for treating me so bad, and I’m going to get a front-row seat!” He spared a glance back, watching Levi buckle the straps over his legs before he turned back around and stalked away from the antagonistic captain. Sometimes, he really was an asshole.

When Alexander arrived at the hospital, his stomach nearly curdled. The nurses were all rushing around, covered in blood. He took a deep breath. He’d seen Faye do the exact same thing, and if Faye could do it, so could he.

“Hey,” He reached a hand out to stop a nurse, “I’m a medic with the Survey Corps. Can I do anything to help you?”

*

“Damn, they just keep coming,” Faye’s chest rose with each huff of air she forced into her lungs. She couldn’t remember the last time she had pushed herself so hard - certainly not within the last five years. Her joints ached, begging her to slow down, if only for a few seconds, but the second she lost her momentum would be the second she died.

“We fight to the very end,” Mike’s gear pulled him to a rooftop, just next to where Faye stood, overlooking the scene. “We haven’t been beaten until we’re eaten.”

“There’s only four left,” The captain’s lungs burned with how much oxygen she inflated them with. “I don’t think it’s worth the risk.” Titan blood was still steaming from her clothes and Mike’s cloak, which she wore proudly. “It’s almost sunset. I think we bought enough time for the kids to safely evacuate everyone, don’t you?”

The titans had been unusually… mindful. More mindful than the typical titan that dawdled around in a blind search for humans. These ones were a little faster, more aware of their movements. More dangerous.

“You’re right,” Mike acknowledged. “You think we should start heading back? Try and lose these titans?”

Faye’s mouth moved to open, but her eyes caught sight of movement beyond a few trees. The thing was huge — and it was a wonder how she hadn’t noticed it before. It was a few meters short of being half the height of the walls, easily the biggest titan Faye could ever remember encountering.

What made her hair stand on edge was that it looked eerily familiar. Like a forgotten memory that had eroded over time.

It resembled a monkey, but its arms were too long for its body, drooping down almost awkwardly. Its eyes perused the ground and trees, cognizant of its surroundings, putrid green eyes roving the interior of the walls. It sported a round belly, but above it looked like a well-maintained six-pack — something Faye had again, never seeing before. Its fur wasn’t matted like she would have expected it to be, but it wasn’t spotless either, and it took long, calculated steps.

Where the hell had she seen a titan-monkey hybrid before?

“I was wondering how long it was going to take you to spot the bastard,” Mike’s eyes darted between Faye and the abnormal titan. “It’s massive, and I’ve never seen one covered in fur before, have you?” He waited for Faye to shake her head before he continued. “It’s just lumbering around, but it hasn’t tried to rush us. Definitely an abnormal, but...”

“The thing is giving me the heebie-jeebies.” Faye shivered. Mike had a point, it had to have noticed them zipping around, but it hadn’t tried to make a move on them… “Let’s get the hell outta here.”

Mike let out a shrill whistle, obliging Faye. He had enough sense to agree with her. In the distance, he heard their horses whinnying, and relief flooded the pair.

Unfortunately, the solace was short-lived when the titan’s hands darted down, scooping both horses up and squeezing. Blood splattered out, raining down on the grass and painting the earth red.

No, this thing had human intelligence.

Mike’s hand instinctively went to draw his last blade - his only defense, while Faye frowned and slowly moved her rifle into place. She’d used most of her round up helping Mike divert the titans and keeping them occupied. There were only 5 bullets left.

It had happened faster than Faye could process, her muscles reeling into action to rip herself away from the incoming horse carcass, which barreled towards her and Mike with crippling accuracy.

She hadn’t lost her balance like Mike, but she was definitely feeling the adrenaline kick in from the near-death experience. Her hands had gone shaky, and as if things couldn’t get any worse, she heard Mike let out a slew of grunts as he tumbled down the rooftop and into the waiting hands of a titan.

His legs were already getting gnashed by one of the smaller titans by the time Faye took a step forward, hand inching towards her second last blade. She froze in place, though, eyes going wide when the monkey-looking titan spoke.

Spoke.

Spoke.

It f*cking spoke.

“Wait,” It commanded, prompting the three-meter to halt its vicious chomping for a second. Blood spurted out of the smaller titan’s mouth as it bit down, tearing into Mike’s flesh while blood gushed out. The titan squatted down, “You must not have heard me. I told you to wait.”

Faye had never considered herself weak-stomached, but the sight of the monkey-titan squeezing the three-meter's head and quite literally popping its eyes out to kill it made her guts contract, begging for her breakfast to move up her throat. She swallowed thickly. Whoever the sick son of a bitch was, was malicious.

“Stay there!” Mike’s voice cracked as he yelled at Faye. “Get back to the walls.”

“Are you crazy?” Faye took a step forward. “I’m not leaving you here to die by these things-”

“May I ask what you call that strange weapon of yours?” The titan interrupted. “The thing attached to your waist that allows you to fly?”

It was finally happening. Marley had sent reinforcements for its candidates, and this must have been one of them. There was no other explanation. Maybe Orwell tipped them off before he put a bullet in his head or something.

“Huh. I’m fairly certain we speak the same language,” The titan’s eyes glanced between Faye and Mike. “Perhaps you’re too frightened to formulate a response? I notice you also use swords. Fascinating. Must mean you know we reside in the nape.” It was noting things off like they were one of Hange’s more docile experiments. “Ah, well. Suppose I’ll just take it back with me.”

It was a position Faye had seen many take during her time in the Marleyan Warrior Program. Mike’s body curled in on itself, and his hands went to protect his head when he saw the abnormal’s hand reaching out.

There was no way either of them was getting out of this alive, and Faye’s feet moved, her hands twitching against the small mechanisms on her gear, which propelled her forward. Her blade sliced through its middle finger, and it would have been its index too if they hadn’t been so… lithe.

“Come on, Mike,” Faye hissed. “Get your ass up. What happened to not giving in? Neither of us is dead yet.” This wasn’t good. She hadn’t been fast enough to stop the monkey-titan from grabbing Mike’s gear, which left him practically defenseless. “Can you stand?”

His legs were f*cked. There was too much blood, and he had chunks missing. Mike Zacharias would die if she didn’t get him somewhere safe immediately and close the wounds.

“Huh?” The abnormal looked up from its inspection of the gear, zeroing in on the pair of soldiers. “Oh.” His free hand moved forward faster than either of them could react, and Faye was forcefully lifted into the air. “You can all move now.”

Her hands went to her blades, or, at least, they tried to. She was held too firmly between the titan's fingers to move around, and she bit back a feral snarl when he pulled her up to inspect.

Mike’s screams rang out from behind Faye, willing her to twist her neck before an involuntary tremor wracked through her spine. It was too much to watch - let alone listen to. It was a sound she had hoped never to hear again. The screams of a comrade who knew they were going to die.

“Stop it,” Wiggling was useless, though she still tried to wrench herself free. “Stop it, stop it, stop it.” Her eyes were burning uncontrollably while hot, thick tears dribbled down her chin. She could handle Petra and the rest of Levi’s squad. “Please, not Mike. Make them stop-”

She heard the crunch of his spinal cord, and she flinched. It was too late for anything now.

The titan inspected her closely, squinting in the orange glow of the sunset. Metal gleaned in the light, and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of a ring, hanging by some twine around the woman's neck. His free hand moved on instinct, carefully pinching the twine from around her neck as he lifted the ring from her neck, holding it up to the light to inspect.

Faye, meanwhile, had gone pale. She knew exactly where she had seen the monkey before.

A neatly stitched monkey plushy. It wasn’t the nicest, but Zeke could tell Faye had put a lot of work into it, going as far as to use two different colors of brown to add detail, and she had embroidered its eyes, nose, and smile. The sides looked like they’d been neatly sutured shut, but it added character.

Silently, Faye wished she had given the ring to Levi before they parted ways. At least then, she could have feigned ignorance.

Chapter 21: 17. Enter! Zeke Jaeger - The Insane

Chapter Text

Erwin Smith couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so utterly stressed.

Sure, he could handle Nile Dok slapping some cuffs on his wrists and having the MPs lead him away from the skirmish with the Female Titan; Levi was more than capable of overseeing Eren’s wellbeing, not to mention Alexander had been appointed to make sure Levi didn’t sustain any further injuries to his leg.

But a literal titan inside the wall?

“For the time being, we’ve covered the Wall Titan with sheets, and it seems to be holding up.” A soldier informed, scurrying to keep pace with Commander Smith. “Further measures will be taken after sundown, commander.”

“Understood.” Came Erwin’s curt response. His patience was thinning faster than he would have liked to admit.

“Forgive me, sir,” Of course, the soldier wouldn’t just report and leave; that would have been asking too much. “But what are we supposed to make of all this? I mean, I never imagined there could be titans inside the walls.”

“Why would you?” The Commander questioned, keeping his eyes forward. “No one did.” He didn’t slow his pace; there was no time to dilly dally. “There were only those who knew and those of us completely in the dark.” He couldn’t help the bitter tone he used nor the downward curl his lips took.

Faye knew.

She had to have known. The eldest Jaeger knew about everything he didn’t, so it made perfect sense that she would have known about the Wall Titan.

“Send an escort for Captain Faye Jaeger immediately,” Erwin ordered. Originally, he had been willing to wait until they made it to Shiganshina for answers, but circ*mstances had shifted, and he needed an explanation as soon as possible for the recent discovery of the titan hiding inside the wall. “I want her in Stohess by morning.”

“Sir!”

Erwin continued forward, and just as he crossed the halfway line, came the toll of the bells, while one of Mike’s soldier’s screamed out for all to hear:

“The titans have breached Wall Rose!”

As if the day could get any worse.

“Commander Smith—”

“I want Captain Levi in my office immediately. And find Lieutenant Ral.” He couldn’t really help the annoyed tone, especially not when he dismissed his men and closed the door behind himself, finally allowed a moment of peace and solitude.

The Scouting Regiment’s commander slumped into his chair, massaging his temples while he heaved out a sigh. The entire day was turning out to be a mess. Half of Stohess had been destroyed during Eren and Annie Leonhart’s titan clash, and Annie hadn’t even been captured and interrogated for answers. Instead, she was encased in some sort of bizarre crystal that blades couldn’t slice through, not to mention that Eren had over-exerted himself and was unconscious. Then came the revelation about the Wall Titan, and now—

f*ck.

Now, Wall Rose had been breached.

The very same wall that he had left Faye trapped in with Mike with the rest of the 104th.

Erwin’s jaw clenched, his hands aggressively pulling a stack of paperwork his way. Best not to focus on Faye and Mike’s situation until he needed to. He was too close to the two of them to think objectively, and until he grounded himself and calmed down, he couldn’t make any decisions.

Meanwhile, Alexander wiped the vomit from his chin, pushing himself away from the toilet bowl. The boy wasn’t sure how long he had kept himself occupied by volunteering in the hospital, but his poor stomach just… couldn’t handle all the blood.

Sure, in the moment, he forced the bile down and focused on tying knots over open wounds, or disinfecting dirt-ridden gashes, or slapping bandages over cuts, but there was only so much he could handle.

“Oi,” Came the familiar drawl. “Erwin wants you to look after Eren.”

“I don’t know, is he covered in blood?” Al’ pinned the short captain with a heated glare, resting his hand on his hip. “Because I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve been up to my elbows in blood today, and I’m not sure I can actually handle—”

“He’s a titan shifter,” Levi deadpanned. “The worst you need to worry about is steam shooting out of his ass.”

“Okay, I didn’t ask for your snarky comments,” Alexander’s nose scrunched. “You can tone down the bitchiness; I doubt either of us is in the mood to —”

“Wall Rose has been breached.”

Alexander froze, lips falling open as he stared slack-jawed at Captain Levi. He wasn’t quite sure he heard his superior correctly.

“Pardon me?” Al’ blinked, voice having gone soft. “I didn’t catch what you said.”

Levi didn’t miss the innocent head tilt Alexander gave, patiently waiting for him to repeat his sentence. Personally, the short captain didn’t exactly want to believe it either, the implications were too great, and he wasn’t sure he was ready to come to terms with the news yet.

“Wall Rose has been breached.”

Even just saying the sentence made it too real. Too close to home. Too close to—

“Faye... ” Al mumbled, face crumpling. “Oh sh*t. Faye is still out there. We—we need to send some backup her way, right?” His heart was racing, and his head had gone unnaturally fuzzy, cluttered with thoughts. “She’s—she’s out there. Faye wouldn’t die. She’s the smartest person I know.”

“Ral, go tend to Eren.” the words came out quietly, nearly under Levi's breathe.

The two shared a beat of silence, Alexander stared, straining his vision to search Levi's eyes for any sort of emotion or understanding. A shred of sympathy. Anything.

“My best friend is out there, probably fighting for her life, and you want me to sit in a room with a kid who regenerates like a f*cking lizard?” Alexander’s chest heaved up and down, the color draining from his face. “She needs help, dammit. I’m heading out to find her.”

“Faye would want you to make sure Eren is okay,” Levi didn’t make a move to block Alexander’s path, but his words stopped the boy dead in his tracks. “You said it yourself, Faye is resourceful, and this isn’t her first time dealing with titans. Stop sh*tting your pants, and start using your head for once.”

“Captain Levi, if Faye is dead—” Oh f*ck. Even just saying those words made his throat tighten. “I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself. She’s all I have left, she’s—she’s my best friend.”

“Stop spiraling,” Came the blunt reply. “Have some faith in your captain. She wasn’t appointed for sh*ts and giggles.” In truth, Levi understood how Alexander felt. It was like his heart wouldn’t slow down, and every time he moved a little too quickly, the ground beneath his feet shifted, throwing his balance off. “She’s already had five solo kills; I think she’ll manage just fine for the time being.”

“I thought you guys were friends,” Alexander’s voice took on an incredulous tone, “She’s the only one you actively made an effort to talk to. So why the hell are you acting so calm? Faye is out there, probably struggling against a horde of titans, and you look like you don’t even care. She’s good at fighting, sure, but she’s not invincible. She—”

“I know.” Levi interrupted. “Spare me the lectures and get your ass over to Eren.” The captain waited for Alexander to trudge over to the door, shoulders slumped and muttering out profanities before he sighed.

At least it wasn’t raining.

When Levi made his way to Erwin’s office, the sky was already darkening, the sun seemingly disappearing faster than usual. Erwin stood at the window, peering out at the half-destroyed town below.

“Why can’t these sons of bitches just leave us alone?” The captain drawled, letting himself in and shutting the door behind him. His eyes trailed to the side, where another soldier stood with a clipboard, likely relaying information between Erwin and the rest of the scouts.

“Can you go?” The commander questioned, turning his eyes to pin Levi with a leveled stare.

“Like there’s a choice.” His ankle and ham—sh*t, what had Faye called them? Ham tendons? Ham… Hamstrings? His ankle and hamstrings kept aching, but Levi carried on, doing his best to act like it was all fine. Like he always did.

“If I may say so, sir,” The soldier spoke up. “Very wise leaving Squad Leader Miche and Captain Faye in charge of the 104th. If anyone can handle the situation, they can.”

“Yes,” Erwin’s lips pulled into a thin line. “Let’s hope so.” Slowly, the commander took a seat at his desk, motioning for Levi to do the same before he excused the soldier, and they were left alone.

“It’s always when I’m not there to do anything,” Levi scowled. “First with Isabel and Furlan, then with my squad, and now with Faye.” His hands balled into fists, teeth clenching. “When she gets back, I’m not letting her out of my f*cking sight. sh*tty doctor...”

“You said that when the two of you encountered the Female Titan during the expedition, you teamed up with Mikasa Ackerman.” The words tasted bitter on Erwin’s tongue, and inwardly, he loathed himself for the words he was about to say. “ If she gets back, I want the two of you to co-captain a team.”

“Is this so I can babysit her, or so she can babysit me?”

“The two of you have a penchant for danger,” Erwin annunciated. “So perhaps you can keep each other from sustaining any life-threatening injuries if she survives.”

“Ral isn’t going to be pleased about this development.”

“The two of you can get more acquainted with your newfound positions while you help the evacuees in Ehrmich.”

*

Faye’s head throbbed, pounding away against the interior of her skull in a dull, stabbing sensation. The pressure felt like it was only building, and it was worse than any migraine she had ever experienced. It took the soldier a moment to notice the feeling of fingers gently brushing through her hair while she was cradled to someone's chest, being rocked back and forth while they hummed a familiar tune. Her head rested in the crook of their neck, and she could feel their throat and chest vibrating with every breath of air they hummed with.

For a second, she wondered if she was dead and whether or not it was Grisha who held tightly to her like he used to when she was a child. Whoever it was smelled exactly like her father, the scent of coffee invading her senses and lulling her. The hands were comforting, one playing with her hair and slowly soothing her headache while the other was wrapped around her waist, rubbing small circles into her hip.

Reality hit her harder than any titan could, dousing her in the cold, hard truth.

Faye swore under her breath while she jumped in the benign enemy’s arms, startling herself backward and away from them, landing her ass on the ground in a heap. Of course she wasn’t dead; that would be too merciful.

“I was wondering when you were going to wake up,” he quietly stated, clasping his hands while he hunched forward to regard Faye. The night blanketed the earth in darkness, the only light coming from the small fire he had lit. “I didn’t mean to squeeze you that hard. I’m sorry.”

That explained why she felt so tenderized.

She didn’t even remember getting knocked out. Maybe it was after he took the ring? But then, wouldn’t she have remembered? Maybe it was so bad her psyche blocked it out… It wouldn’t be the first time.

A tense moment of silence hung in the air while Faye assessed the man in front of her. Even sitting, she could tell he was tall, and there was no doubt in Faye’s mind he was related to Dina. The blonde hair and bright blue eyes were unmistakable, not to mention the pale skin he bore. If she squinted, Faye could make out the ghost of Grisha’s genes, too, but they were practically unnoticeable unless you knew exactly where to look.

“You killed Mike.” She softly conceded. She didn’t look angry, merely glum and doleful.

“Was that his name?” He canted his head with a thoughtful tilt on his lips. “I tried to talk to him, but the poor guy looked like he was ready to piss himself.”

“You’re going to insult the man you murdered?” Faye’s fingers twitched at the sight of two rifles lying next to his feet, begging her to reach out and put a hole in one of his kneecaps. “I never would have assumed you would be so callous.” She didn't raise her voice, but there was an edge to her words.

“Awfully big words for someone I spared.” The blond countered, hunching forward on the log he sat on. “You might want to try practicing gratitude. ”

Faye co*cked an eyebrow, “Hard to believe we shared a womb,” Disgust coursed her veins while she frowned. He was acting like a complete and utter asshole.

“So you do recognize me,” His lips curled into a satisfied smile. “I was getting kind of worried there.”

“You look a lot older with the beard, but you look too much like mom to mistake for anyone else,” Faye admitted, mind teetering back to a certain blonde in the 104th who also looked like Dina Fritz… “Your titan form could stand to lose a few pounds, though.”

“Maybe when we get home, I can show you the inspiration behind it,” Zeke offered, acting innocent despite Faye’s narrowed eyes. “You remember the monkey you made me don’t you? I kept it all these years as a tribute to you.”

“Unfortunately, I won’t be accompanying you back to Marley,” Her tone was clipped, not sparing any sentiment for her twin. “You’ll need to send my regards to the higher-ups; I can’t imagine they’ll be pleased to know the famed Faye Jaeger slipped through their fingers again.”

Zeke canted his head in an almost confused fashion. “What makes you think I’ll allow you to leave again?”

A sharp exhale of air left Faye’s nose, “It’s not like you stopped me the first time.” She knew the words were harsh, but they needed to be said. The less emotional attachment Zeke felt for her, the less of a chance he would try anything untoward.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Zeke’s voice lowered in a warning tone. “Your mechanical wire device was crushed, and you’re defenseless unless you’re counting the medical supplies you have packed away in that little bag of yours.” The firelight reflected off of Zeke’s glasses, casting deep lines into his thinned lips. “You’re trapped in this forest with me until sun up, when we’ll be making our way back to the ships.”

“You sound pretty certain.”

Zeke shrugged, “I’ll drag you back if I have to. It’s for your own good.”

“What is this?” Faye scoffed. “You feel so out of control in your own life that you need to take over mine? Is that it?” She wasn’t a psychologist, but her twin wasn’t exactly being discreet. “What’s next? Are you going to tell me Orwell wasn’t lying about your kink for women who look like me?”

“I’m surprised the news even reached John,” The warrior mumbled, expertly feigning an embarrassed blush while he scratched his neck. “Seems like I’ve made quite an impression on everyone.”

“Drop the innocent act,” The soldier frowned, taking a step back. “You’re not fooling anyone by pretending to be bashful and charming.” The news that Orwell hadn’t been lying hit Faye like a ton of bricks, forcing her muscles to tense. This was the complete opposite of an ideal situation, and Zeke’s ability to present himself as harmless had almost fooled her.

“Oh?” The Warrior’s lips curled, “You think my acting skills need some polishing?”

“I think you need to see a therapist,” Faye corrected, hair standing on end at the predatory grin her twin wore. “Maybe work through your issues. Especially if you think incest is acceptable in this day and age.”

“Careful, Faye,” Zeke warned, slowly rising from his seat. “You might hurt my feelings if you keep insulting me like that.”

“I think the only thing at risk is going to be your pride if you don’t keep your distance,” the soldier took a step backward, keeping a sizable gap between her and Zeke. The last thing she needed was to get corned like a wounded dog. “And maybe your fingers if you try touching me.”

“You’re cute when you try to act intimidating.” Zeke’s bones cracked as he languidly stretched, seemingly unfazed by Faye’s threats. “The truth of it is that you’re terrified. You probably don’t know what to expect from me, and the thought of what I plan to do to you makes your fingers twitch.” He took a slow step forward, reveling in how his sister took two backward. “Face it, Faye. I’ve finally surpassed you.”

“I’m going to boil your f*cking teeth if you don’t sit back down,” Faye growled.

“I missed your potty mouth. The curse words always did sound prettier coming from your lips.”

The round of expletives Faye bit down would have put Levi to shame — especially after Zeke took another taunting step forward, canines flashing in the firelight mockingly.

“What, you’re going to stop swearing because I complimented you?” He derided. “I thought you would take it in stride like you do with everything else. Or maybe you’re acting coy on purpose.” He let a heartbeat of silence pass before he hummed, “Well, which is it? Or are you planning on acting shy the entire night?”

The world around the small fire had gone pitch black while clouds roamed over the moon, leaving only Faye and her twin bathed in the warm glow of the flickering fire. She was rapidly approaching the border where the light stretched and where she could hide in the shadows.

“You should really see a shrink,” Faye stalled, taking another calculated step away from her brother. “They might be able to help with your obsession with me. If you’re lucky, they might even put you in an asylum.”

“I’m not sure an asylum could keep me away from you,” Zeke chuckled, eyes following Faye’s movements with his undivided attention. “You’re the only thing keeping me sane.”

“On the contrary,” Faye bent her knees, flexing her fingers while she steeled herself. “I think I’ve driven you crazy.”

The Scout Captain lunged for the cover of darkness, adrenaline coursing through her circulatory system. She could hear Zeke swearing as he followed her, but it was nothing in comparison to the sound of her heart pumping blood through her veins and arteries, which muffled most everything else.

“I never took you for the type to enjoy being chased,” Zeke’s voice echoed in the dark abyss, “You always hated tag.”

Faye halted, the metaphorical lightbulb flickering to life inside her head. Slowly, she crept to the side, feeling her way around the trees and back the way she came. If Zeke was busy looking for her in the forest, that meant he had left the rifles unattended back at the campfire. Maybe there really was a god looking out for her after all.

The light of the fire was easy to spot, and stealthily, Faye circled the perimeter, scooping both guns into her arms before she darted back into the blanket of darkness. Things were looking up, and now the only issue Faye faced was figuring out her cardinal directions to make it back to the walls and keeping herself from getting eaten by the titans.

The silence was deafening, and after the initial thrill wore off, the Scout Captain kept her ear out for Zeke, who had gone uncharacteristically quiet. Zeke’s rifle had been slung over Faye’s shoulders while her own was held up, aimed forward while her finger hovered over the trigger.

The seconds dragged on into minutes of meandering through the dark. Every so often, a twig would snap, and Faye could only hope it was the wildlife roaming around. Her luck hadn’t given out on her yet, and as soon as she made it back to the walls, Faye could grieve for Mike.

Mike…

Damn, his death had happened so fast, and Faye had been utterly useless to prevent it. All she had really done was freeze when the titan started talking, and she hadn’t even fired off a round of bullets, nothing. Couldn’t even kill a few of the ones that had started chewing on his legs. And —f*ck— the sound of his spine getting snapped while his screams died in the back of his throat? Faye doubted she’d ever be able to forget the sound…

How was she going to tell Erwin and Levi? How was she supposed to explain herself to them? About the way she had frozen in horror at the sound of actual words being formed by a titan, who she later realized was her twin brother? There was no telling exactly what had gone on in Stohess, but it had to be better than having Zeke, and the titans breach Wall Rose, right?

Were they even worried about her?

Maybe it really was for the best if Faye just… Didn’t make it back. She had all these secrets riding on her shoulders, and if she were being honest, it would just be easier on everyone if she died a quiet death, slipping away without any fuss. She was getting tired, and it wasn’t like she had anyone depending on her anymore. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin had all grown up, and they weren’t living in her teashop anymore. Alexander was starting to pave his own way, and hopefully, he would defect from the military after her death and start the tea shop back up, and Levi and Erwin? Well… They were used to their comrades dying, so what was one more to the numbers?

The snap of a twig up ahead caught Faye’s attention, ripping her from her thoughts. It was too heavy to just be another fawn or bunny. The crack echoed again, this time closer, and as if things couldn’t get any f*cking worse, the clouds parted, and moonlight shone down through the leaves.

“Found you.”

Instinct kicked in, and Faye’s finger squeezed the trigger, sending two bullets straight into Zeke’s kneecaps. Again, she lined her aim up to his chest, though she didn’t fire any rounds off. Instead, she cautiously took a few steps backward.

“f*ck,” Zeke wheezed out a laugh, ears reeling with the echoing gunshots. “I see your aim is still annoyingly perfect.” His legs were steaming, burning as the bullets were slowly pushed out of his knees while he staggered forward. “You should really point your gun somewhere else. You might accidentally hurt someone.”

“Don’t make me waste my bullets,” Faye warned. “I’m giving you the option to walk out of this forest scot-free if you turn around and forget you ever saw me.”

“It’s going to be really awkward when I get back to the fleets,” He grunted when one of the bullets exited his flesh, landing on the ground as he forced his steaming legs to move forward again. “And I have to tell the minister that my wife-to-be got cold feet.”

“Wife to be..?” Faye echoed, fingers going numb as she stumbled away. “You—you want— you want to...marry me?” The words sounded crazier coming from the soldier's lips, and it took a couple of heartbeats to actually register what Zeke had just said.

“How else am I supposed to cuff you to me to ensure you don’t run again?”

Another round of bullets sailed through the air, nailing both of Zeke’s kneecaps again, stunting his movement and stalling for more time.

Faye’s chest heaved, and she furrowed her brows, trying to figure out just how psychologically damaged her twin was. Sure, she knew it wasn’t going to be an easy reunion, and she had prepared herself for what she thought would be the worst-case scenario, but her imagination hadn’t even realized that marriage was a possibility.

“Just because bullets can’t kill me doesn’t mean they don’t hurt.”

“You’re insane,” Faye murmured. “Don’t you need my consent to marry me? You can’t be dumb enough to think I’d follow along and just agree to that.”

“Nothing a little money couldn’t fix,” The warrior shrugged, still steaming. He moved his legs slowly, but he’d be damned if she got away again.

“You were going to bribe the minister?” She only had one bullet left before she needed to switch to Zeke’s rifle, and there was no telling how many rounds he had; best to assume he was at zero.

This was so much worse than anticipated. There was no way she could go back home with him. Absolutely no f*cking way in hell. It felt like every time Zeke opened his mouth, Faye found herself more and more horrified with who he had turned into.

Maybe if she stayed, things would have turned out differently…

“Your hands are shaking,” Zeke commented, canines peeking through in an animalistic grin. “Is that the adrenaline or the fear peeking through?” His legs were still steaming, but they were usable again, which meant he just needed to catch her off guard.

“Zeke, this is your last warning,” Faye took a deep breath in, lining her aim to point the barrel of the gun at her twin’s head. “If you don’t start backing away, I’m going to shoot you right between the eyes.”

“That’s not going to kill me, just piss me off.”

Faye didn’t hesitate, the years of being in the warrior program hitting her with the apathy needed to take a life. The bullet whistled through the air, but the second her finger squeezed and fired, she had already turned tail and started sprinting, eager to put some distance between her and her twin.

The air had chilled, and the last thing of Mike’s was the only thing that kept her warm as she forced her legs to run faster. His cloak fluttered behind her, and the only sounds filling the forest were Faye’s heavy breaths, her footfalls, and Zeke swearing out into the dead of night. If she were lucky, the moon would get veiled by the clouds again, and she could slip away into the darkness undetected.

She could see the ominous figures of titans, standing perfectly still in the moonlight. She wasn’t sure if they actually slept, but from what Faye understood, most of them only operated during the day when the sun touched them. If there were any abnormals, she would hear them before she saw them, and hopefully, she could get to safety before they reached her.

Her footfalls were cut off abruptly when she felt the weight of the taller man tackling her to the ground, and she would have taken a nose dive if she hadn’t maneuvered mid-air to land rather painfully on her back, head bouncing against the ground. She was working on pure adrenaline, movements shaky and imprecise but action-packed. Her fist reeled back, slamming into Zeke’s jaw before she tried to crawl backward.

“Alright, Faye,” Zeke’s voice had gone gravelly, his fingers latched onto his sister’s wrist before he wrenched her toward him, his other hand already working to find her free arm. “I tried to be courteous — come on, up you go.” He grunted when he forced her up to stand, pinning Faye’s wrists behind her back with one hand while the other clamped over her shoulder in a vice-like grip. “But you’re wearing on my nerves, and now I’m inclined to do things the hard way.”

“Zeke, you don’t want this,” Faye tried, wiggling around in a hopeless attempt to free herself. “I’d make a terrible wife. I can’t cook, I’m impulsive and reckless, and I can’t even follow orders.”

“Nothing a little discipline can’t fix.” In truth, this had been exactly what he was expecting. Of course she had grown out of compliancy; Orwell said she worked in a tea shop for the last few years, and it wasn’t like there had been anyone to rectify her wayward nature. “I’ll take care of you. Don’t worry, Faye.”

Faye’s body went on autopilot, doing her best to make a nuisance out of herself if only to prove her point. She kept muttering out profanities, trying to shake Zeke off of her, or kick his legs, but the man was steadfast in dragging her back to his makeshift campsite.

*

The ride to Ehrmich had been long and tense. Alexander had quietly sat in the corner of the wagon, hands wringing together while he tuned out the conversation. Images of Faye getting mauled to death by titans kept invading his imagination, and he had to keep reminding himself that she was going to make it out alive.

She had to…

“Come on, Ral,” Levi called, waiting on the ground for his subordinate. “You’re taking longer than my morning sh*ts.” His impatience was only getting worse, and the captain loathed that he had been sent to help Hange and the refugees in Ehrmich. “I don’t tolerate dawdling on my squad. You’d do well to remember that.”

“If Faye were here—”

“Well, she’s not,” Levi snapped. “So stop bringing her name up.” It was the very name that kept creeping into Levi’s thoughts. Wondering if his fellow captain was even still breathing and whether or not there would be anything salvageable of her body left. Had she been swallowed whole, or had the titans missed a hand or a leg? Maybe, if he was lucky, their teeth had missed the ring and the pendant.

Alexander said nothing, but he followed behind Captain Levi, who guided Pastor Nick down some stairs. He nearly bumped into the short captain when he came to an abrupt stop at the bottom of the stairs, but he glanced up just in time to stop.

Pastor Nick had frozen in his tracks, staring down at the scene. There were hundreds — if not thousands of refugees who all moved in one direction, eager to find somewhere safe and warm to spend the night. Children had tears streaming down their faces with raw cheeks. Somewhere within the sea of people, a little boy cried out for his parents frantically. A pregnant woman limped forward, caressing her unborn child, while a little girl held onto her free hand, sniffling every so often. A crude doll laid on the ground, getting trampled over by adults and children alike.

“No one told you to stop. A rolling stone gathers no moss.” Levi apathetically growled, his foot finding Pastor Nick’s back to nudge him forward. “Maybe you expected something quaint? This is what happens when the walls give.” His own eyes roved over the refugees, silently wishing them the best. Nick tried to turn away, shielding his eyes from the horrors, but the captain grabbed his collar, forcing him to face the crowd. “No. Take it in, holy man. These are the faces of human beings who’ve lost everything they ever had. Human beings you and your kind abandoned, incidentally.” His lips curled back in disgust. “Hard to look at it, I’d imagine. But if the church had its way, this would be all of us. Titans would pour in and make a feast of what’s left, shoveling man, woman, and child down their putrescent gullets. All humanity digested as one.”

“Captain Levi,” Alexander hissed, swiping furiously at his eyes. “For f*cks sake, I’m worried about my best friend, and you’re making it worse.”

In truth, Levi didn’t even know where the monologue had come from. It was probably thanks to the anxiety Faye had stirred inside his guts, and like an annoying itch, she just kept finding her way into his thoughts.

“Come on.” Levi shoved the pastor forward, joining the crowds. “Hange should be around here somewhere.”

Alexander pressed forward in silence. He noticed that Nick kept his gaze down, unwilling to look at the scene he was refusing the help, while Levi had clamped a hand down on his shoulder, guiding the pastor and forcing him to move along.

It didn’t take the three long to reach the boarding courtyard, where Hange had been overseeing the preparations with their assistant, Moblit.

“So, seen the light yet, by any chance?” Hange cooly regarded Nick, who kept his eyes trained on the ground with a deep frown sitting on his lips. “Oh goddamn it, make up your mind! This isn’t some spiritual test; lives are on the line.”

Faye’s life was on the line— if she hadn’t already died yet…

“Alas, I have no choice,” Nick sighed. “Neither myself nor the others who believe are at liberty to divulge the truth.”

“Fat lot of help you are,” Hange shouted, oblivious to the way Alexander’s face crumpled at their yelling. “Thanks for keeping us company. It’s been fun.” Their tone was sarcastic as they spun on their heel, prepared to stomp off.

“I’d offer my help if I could, but a duty as great as this one is beyond me,” The pastor mumbled, watching as Hange turned to regard him. “The Order of the Walls abides by the Sacred Will. Our faith commands us to obey.”

“Whose ‘Sacred will?’ Do you mean, like, God or something?” Their tone left nothing to speculate. It was clear that Hange Zoe believed in no god.

“I can’t answer that,” Nick admitted. “But what I can do is provide you with a name. An individual that the Sacred Will, in its divine wisdom, instructed us to monitor.”

“Holy f*cking Walls,” Alexander breathed, his sanity waning with every second he spent listening to Nick blather on and on. “Just f*cking get to the point already. My best friend is out there, and the sooner you give us the name, the sooner I can get my ass out there and find her.”

“My apologies,” The pastor abated. “It’s a child by the name of Krista Lenz.”

It took Alexander a minute to realize that Eren, Armin, and Mikasa had also circled around to listen intently, their eyes widening at the name of their comrade.

“You must find her with all haste. She is the key.” Nick’s expression turned nearly haunted as he continued. “She may know things we understand but poorly. With that, we come to the end of what I’m free to share.” He inhaled deeply, taking a second to gather his thoughts. “The rest I leave in your capable hands.”

“But if—if she’s in the 104th Cadet Corps,” Hange stuttered. “She’s at the front lines by now.”

With Faye…

“Then let’s go,” Eren urged. “Come on; there’s no time to lose-oof.” The youngest Jaeger had meant to spin and break into a jog, but he knocked straight into another recruit, sending the both of them tumbling down in a heap.

Al’ hadn’t even seen the teenager come in.

“I was sent to give a message to Commander Erwin, who then entrusted me to deliver this to you, Section Commander,” Sasha formally explained, thrusting the letter over to Hange.

“So, who is Nick talking about?” Hange asked, walking over to where the trio stood, shrugging on their gear with haste while peering down at Erwin’s neat lettering.

“She was the smallest one in our class,” Eren admitted. “Golden hair, blue eyes.”

“In fact, she’s uh, kinda cute,” Armin confessed, blushing just slightly.”

“The girl who’s always hanging around Ymir,” Mikasa added.

“Calm down, Eren,” Levi finally stepped forward, grabbing the metaphorical reins of the situation. “I need you all to listen. We’re going our separate ways; that’s how it has to be. Erwin has his reasons for throwing this ragtag squad together, but right now, this is all riding on you.” When Levi put his mind to it, he wasn’t half bad at doing motivational speeches. Maybe it was from listening and helping Erwin prepare all of his.

Alexander’s mind pulled himself out of the conversation. It made no difference to him, but he needed to start doing something, or else he would go crazy. The whole ride down the Ehrmich had Al’ twisting his fingers into knots while his mind reeled with all the possible ways Faye had died, and he only hoped he was wrong about it all.

“Ral, you’re staying here with me.”

Alexander’s eyes nearly bulged as he whipped his head around to stare at his captain, suddenly all too aware that Eren, Mikasa, Armin, and Hange had already left to prepare their horses.

“What? Why?” His voice had gone small, lips tugging into a frown. “I promise I won’t get in the way, but I-I should be there for her. I need to make sure Faye is okay. I can’t just leave her out there for the titans.”

“You’re too close to this,” Levi’s stoicism remained steadfast as he continued. “You’ve been dragging your ass everywhere and moping around like you have to take a sh*t. If she’s not there, you’re going to run off and get yourself killed.” He let a heartbeat pass, where he held eye contact with the youngest Ral. It was intense, each quietly gauging the other. “For now, you can help hand out provisions to the refugees and look over any injuries they might have received on the way here.”

“If she’s dead, I’m holding you accountable,” Al’ muttered, spinning on his heel with an aggressive huff.

Levi watched his back, eyebrows knitting together. It was for the best. The boy was acting like a loose cannon.

*

“Heh,” Zeke’s hand came up to his nose, which Faye had just finished driving her forehead into. The blood had already started steaming, evaporating into thin air thanks to his titan-shifting abilities. “Feisty little thing, aren’t you?” That was the third time Faye had managed to draw blood while he was tying her up, a feat he couldn’t help but feel just a little proud of.

“Only when provoked.”

Zeke carefully finished the knot, stepping away from his twin to review his handiwork. The ropes suspending Faye had been tied a few inches higher than needed, which allowed for her feet just barely to brush against the ground if she stretched.

“If you keep glaring at me like that, I’ll start wondering if you really want to go through with the wedding or not.”

“Your sarcasm is giving me a headache,” Faye growled, snapping her head up to meet Zeke’s amused eyes while she dangled from the ropes. The sudden movement caused her to swing slightly, and Faye’s toes struggled to reach the ground in an attempt to stop herself.

Zeke couldn’t help it when his fingers stretched out, ghosting over Faye’s cheeks to brush a few stray hairs out of the way. Despite being suspended, she was still shorter than him. It was cute.

“I’m getting tired of your hostile attitude towards me,” His voice had lowered, eyes boring into hers. He cupped her jaw, the pad of his thumb rubbing small circles into her cheek tenderly despite the dangerous tone he used. “You look like you’re just waiting for me to f*ck the disobedience out of you.”

For a second, the world had gone quiet, the trees and titans all fading away, while Faye stared at Zeke, processing his threat. She had promised herself she wasn’t going to cry, but god, was he ever testing her resilience. She could handle the men from Shiganshina and the interrogation unit from Marley, but her own brother? The thought was revolting.

The sad part was that it was probably her own fault for Zeke’s certifiably deranged antics.

Maybe if she hadn’t left Marley, he wouldn’t be so eager to make up for lost time, and they could have grown up with a normal sibling relationship…

Zeke unclasped her — Mike’s — cloak, folding it before he set it down on the ground. He worked with patience, languidly removing and readjusting her clothing to his satisfaction. It could have been worse. At least he wasn’t ripping and shredding her clothes. He started with her —Mike’s — cloak before he moved on to her shoes and pants, his thumbs brushing against her skin, reveling in the softness.

‘It’s just sex,’ She told herself. ‘You’ve done this a hundred times. What’s one more to the numbers?’

Except it wasn’t going just to be one more time. Zeke expected a wife, and for all Faye knew, she would have another thirteen years left of this sh*t. And then she’d be stranded in Marley with no way back to the walls.

The warrior hitched her shirt up, tracing the scars on Faye’s abdomen. There were already three, but by the looks of it, they had all missed the mark. A pity that he would need to do it himself, especially after he was done with Faye for the night.

“Orwell mentioned in his last letter that you got shot and then sutured the wound shut immediately afterward,” He didn’t doubt her skills, but he needed to make sure she would survive until morning. Of course, he had already checked her medical bag to ensure she had all the necessary tools, disinfectant, a needle and thread, painkillers, and from what he had seen, she was definitely well enough equipped to save herself. Not to mention that if worse came to worst, he knew a little about patching people up. “Is that true?”

Faye gave what felt like a disembodied nod, barely putting any thought into the strange question. The cool night air nipped at her exposed flesh, ghosting over where Zeke’s hands rested on her hips and down her legs. She tried to focus on anything else, tried to envision her days in the tea shop, bantering with Alexander, or sitting with Levi in the medical wing of the old castle they used as a base when she first enrolled in the Scouts, literally anything else except for reality.

“Oh come on, Faye,” Zeke hooked his fingers into the waistband of her underwear. “Don’t tell me you’ve given up already,” He hadn’t been anticipating his sister to go so quiet; he expected her to kick up more of a fuss, to kick and scream, shouting profanities at him . “I was looking forward to breaking you.”

“Is that how you imagined this instant? You want to force me into submission?” Faye tiredly looked up at her captor, wrists starting to go raw from the ropes that kept her suspended. “You’re a cad.”

Zeke’s hands slid the fabric down her legs and off her ankles, lazily throwing it on top of the small pile of her clothes before he felt around inside his jacket pocket. He stood to his full height, sliding Dina’s wedding ring onto Faye’s finger, and leaned in, resting his forehead against Faye’s.

“We’ll work on your compliment-giving skills next.”

Faye flinched when Zeke’s lips found hers, his beard scratching at her chin. While he seemed eager, she clenched her jaw and braced herself for what would inevitably be one of the worst nights of her life. She leaned out of the one-sided kiss, nausea welling up in the pits of her stomach.

Zeke didn’t seem to mind, and instead, his mouth trailed down her neck, hands descending with fervor.

The soldier’s eyes screwed shut, trying to hide the tears that had started burning her eyes and choking down the strangled sobs that threatened to hit the open air. Zeke was murmuring things against her neck, but it made no difference to her. Not when he was so… clinically insane. Not ever.

She wished that it would have happened like when she was a kid, where she had blocked the memory out and found herself transported from one moment to the next, but Faye’s consciousness remained steadfast in the present, insistent that she feel and remember it all.

The feel of his hands squeezing into flesh, the first thrust inside of her, the heavy, coffee-scented breath, the lazy toss of his glasses when he got serious. She lived through it all. His hands didn’t leave anything to be desired, roaming and gripping wherever he could like an addict. He didn’t stop after the first round, either.

He just kept going.

Seconds ticked by into minutes, which blurred together. Honestly, Faye had no clue how long she had been tied to the branch and suspended, subjected to Zeke’s demeaning fantasies. Her mind kept teetering back to the Marleyans who interrogated her as a child and the fingers they forced her to swallow whole while they used her. Then she’d get flashes of the men from Shiganshina who were looking for a good night away from their wives, and how they all smelled like straight alcohol and sweat, and how desperate they all were.

Most men, as Faye had come to learn at a young age, were vile.

At one point, Zeke had reeled back to actually look at Faye, and he faltered in his movements for a split second. Of all things, tears had started streaming down her cheeks, but she hadn’t made a sound.

For a woman who was hailed as the “God of War” back in Marley, Faye sniffled rather pathetically.

And to think that not an hour ago, she had been ruthlessly gunning him down. A pity she hadn’t stayed in Marley when she was younger; perhaps he could have saved her from being reduced to such a feeble woman. He would need to fix that.

In truth, Zeke wasn’t sure why he watched his sister so intently. Maybe it stemmed from some sort of morbid fascination at the way Faye’s breaths came out in quick puffs, her chest rising and falling at an alarming rate. She had gone pale, a numb frown adorning her lips as she mindlessly stared at the guns on the opposite end of the clearing.

“Come back to me,” The warrior murmured, fingers wrapping around her neck in an attempt to win back Faye’s attention. “I’m going to — f*ck —” He could barely get the words out when he felt the familiar high. He subconsciously squeezed, tightening his grip on Faye’s airways as he came again, oblivious to the choked gasps for air escaping Faye.

When his hands left her throat, the air got lodged into her throat, spurring Faye to start coughing and hacking on the oxygen that filled her lungs too quickly. The world kept tilting on his axis, veering off to one side while the trees tipped to the other in a bizarre mirage. It was the lightheadedness. It had to be. It didn’t help that Faye was also developing a headache — likely thanks to the lack of water she had consumed within the last twenty-four hours.

The sound of Zeke pulling out made bile rise in the back of Faye’s throat, only to be swallowed back down. Shame coursed through her veins when he stepped back to admire his handiwork, eyes roving over her exposed flesh, which was now riddled with the start of bruises.

Satisfaction rolled through the man as he tucked himself back to his pants, eyes lingering on Faye’s thighs where his sem*n had started dripping down. Sure, he had made a mess of things, but it had all been necessary.

“Are you hungry?” The words came out casually, trying to offer an olive branch to his twin.

“No.” Faye lied. It was a stupid question. She hadn’t eaten in hours; of course, she was f*cking hungry. Her stomach felt like an empty cavern, the starvation kept licking her insides, begging her for sustenance, but her pride was on the line.

Zeke’s eyes narrowed, head tilting quizzically. She was an awful actress, but if she didn’t want his generosity, he wouldn’t push. He turned around to stalk over to the other side of the clearing. The sun wouldn’t be coming up for another few hours, and by the looks of Faye, she could really use some sleep. He would make it quick.

His fingers latched around the strap of Faye’s medical bag, humming to himself as his other hand felt around his pockets, fingers wrapping around the switchblade. She was going to be fine, one way or another, he would make sure of that, but still… Guilt seized his heart at what he was about to do.

He was certain he would feel more guilty if he didn’t, though.

Faye held her breath when she saw the glint of fire reflected on the metal’s surface. Maybe if she were lucky, he’d call her damaged goods and just kill her. Slowly, she exhaled, staring up at the sky. Her whole body throbbed, aching in places she wished never even existed.

Zeke stepped forward, one hand securing her waist while the other worked on cutting the rope suspending Faye. He heard her grunt, legs giving out when they hit the ground, and he caught her before she could tumble into a heap on the ground.

“Come on,” His tone went soft as he helped Faye lean against the tree, sliding her down to sit. “I’ve got you.” His hands worked to undo the ropes binding her wrists together, setting it aside for later use.

“What is it now?” The sound grated against her throat, coming out hoarsely. “You haven’t had your fill on the sex yet? Or did you finally get bored of me?” It was too much effort to look Zeke in the eyes, and she settled for staring up at the inky sky between the shadows of leaves.

“I’ve heard that you have extensive experience in treating serious injuries,” He said the words slowly, tasting them as they rolled off his tongue. He had done research before this, of course, but the nerves were still boiling just beneath the surface.

“Yeah, I helped out at dad’s hospital all the time, don’t you remember?”

Of course he did. He could never forget that Faye was Grisha’s favorite child, though it wasn’t like Zeke could blame his biological father. He saw what Grisha did in Faye, too.

“And your illicit hospital?” His fingers tightened around the hilt of his blade, steeling himself. He’d make it quick. He was merciful if nothing else.

“Everything from treating arthritis to amputating dead limbs—” A strangled gasp flew past Faye’s lips, cutting her off while her hands flew to her stomach, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. Her eyes had screwed shut while she struggled to inflate her lungs.

Zeke’s blade dug straight into Faye’s abdomen, slicing downward before he pulled away and repeated the motion, more to the right and lower.

“Zeke?” Faye’s eyes were flooding with tears as the knife sunk back into her skin, forcing her to choke back a scream. She couldn’t even formulate the sentence to ask him what the f*ck he was doing before he stabbed her again. She could feel the knife slicing through her skin as she tried to scamper backward, but Zeke leaned his weight on her legs, and one of his hands found her wrists to pin them down.

“This is hurting you just as much as it is me,” Zeke murmured, lips pulled thin while concentration lined his features. “But it has to be done. We can’t bring another Eldian child into this world, Faye. Don’t you understand that?” Blood was mixing with the sem*n on her thighs as he plunged the blade in once more. “We can't allow another generation to be subjected to this hatred. You understand that, don’t you?”

The words weren't registering in Faye's brain, going in one ear and out the other while she watched Zeke retract his blood-stained hand before he stabbed her again. Her hands had gone shaky, a guttural whine sounding, grating against her throat when the knife caught on her pelvic bone.

"Stop," She tried to fight against his grip, her sight going a little fuzzy with the blinding pain, while her ears deafened to a loud ringing noise. "You're going to kill me, stop it!"

Chapter 22: 18. Dead!

Chapter Text

A flock of birds tore through the trees when a scream pierced the air in a desperate cry. The scent of blood laced the forest, hanging thick and blending with the dirt.

“We can’t let another Eldian child into this world, Faye,” Zeke murmured, brushing the sweat-laden hair away from Faye’s eyes. “I had to. You know I had to. They would have just suffered the same way we did.”

Tense.

It had been the first habit Faye had ever trained out of her body because it wasted precious energy. Energy that could have been put to better use keeping her ass out of the line of fire. Yet, for the first time in a decade, Faye’s shoulders and legs involuntarily tensed, trying to prepare her for the knife that swung down for the seventh time, impaling her.

Maybe this was meant to be her atonement for all her sins.

“I know.” Faye’s voice came out in a rasp, gritting against her throat like sandpaper. “I know you had to.” It was a complete and utter lie, but to be honest, she didn’t feel like pissing Zeke off when he still had a knife wrenched into her uterus.

Her breaths were coming out in quick puffs, lungs only expanding halfway before the air was forced back out. The pain seared into her muscles, making them spasm and contract, begging her to make the blistering and mind-numbing stab wounds stop pulsating in heat. She was losing a lot of blood too quickly, and if something wasn’t done to close the wounds, Faye was going to die.

“It’s going to be okay,” Zeke assured. “We’re going to sew you up.” His free hand reached across Faye, dragging her medical bag across the ground.

“Zeke,” Faye struggled to keep her voice calm, trying not to sound as anxious as she felt. “I need you to hold my legs down.” There wasn’t exactly any other choice. If her knees jolted unexpectedly, she could end up screwing all of her sutures up, and considering the fact that she was quickly approaching Death’s doorstep, she didn’t want to push her luck.

Mike was right when he told Faye that the leather jacket might have come in handy, and she cursed herself to Hell and back for not listening to him when he told her to order another one. She could have used it to bite down on while she sewed her skin together.

The soldier uncorked the bottle of alcohol, waiting for Zeke to lean his weight over her knees.

Faye’s throat constricted when the familiar sensation of her innards burning hit her with full force. It was like the alcohol was drenching her in sweltering heat, licking away at the exposed flesh with a vicious hunger meant to devour her whole. Ringing roared to life in her ears, muffling the guttural whine that escaped her esophagus.

At least the feel of isopropyl alcohol eating away at the bacteria was loud and clear. If Faye could feel the pain , then she was still alive .

Thus began the arduous task of stitching the stab wounds while Faye was half-coherent. The Scout Captain did her best to focus on rhythmically sliding the curved needle in and out of her skin before tying them in knots. She tried to keep the sutures neat, clearing away the blood every so often with some saline solution, but it was near impossible.

‘It’s not that bad, ’ Faye tried to convince herself. ‘There’s no way he stabbed you that deep.’

Then came the rational part of her brain that whispered the unthinkable:

‘His knife caught on the bone .’ It wasn’t a reality Faye was ready to face quite yet, and it only spurred her to tie the suture a little more aggressively than needed. ‘He stabbed clean into your womb multiple times and then dragged the blade along all the tissue. Nothing is ever going to grow in there… Ever. ’

Faye’s needle pierced her skin as she shuddered in a breath, holding the whine in the back of her esophagus. Her throat was still sore from when Zeke had attempted to choke her out, and the tips of her fingers had gone numb; she couldn’t tell if it was from the blood loss or how chilly the night had become.

Zeke, on the other hand, couldn’t peel his eyes from the scene. It was something about the soft tremble in Faye’s fingers as she knotted another suture, biting back groans. He liked hearing the way Faye muttered out profanities, usually followed by a hiss of pain before she hooked the needle into her skin. He was enthralled by the sight of his twin, sitting in a pool of her own blood while she worked on sewing her skin back together. Every once in a while, her legs would give a jerk, and he had positioned himself just right , so her knee would graze his—

Zeke’s heart stopped. Faye’s movements slowed to a halt, eyes glassing over while the hooked needle held by a pair of medical-grade tweezers slid from her fingers. Her head hung from her neck, hair framing her face while her lips parted slightly.

Zeke tried calling her name, but his sister remained unmoved, eyes unblinking and freezing to the touch. She held no pulse or semblance of breathing, and for a second, the earth had gone unnaturally still, the silence inescapable.

Faye Jaeger was dead.

It all happened so gradually that Faye hadn’t even noticed the impending darkness that sank into the ground, encroaching from the shadows of the trees. It sleuthed forward, swallowing the world in its wake, patiently stretching over the forest until it had gobbled the last ember within the crackling fire, and swept over Zeke, leaving Faye to swim in a sea of pitch black.

For a long heartbeat, it felt like her lungs had filled with seawater, drowning her from the inside out and ruthlessly cutting off her oxygen supply while she floundered. She could feel her lungs sizzling, begging for air to inflate them and contract her diaphragm, smoldering over her innards.

It was only a heartbeat, and before long, it all subsided, leaving the Scout Captain drenched in a pool of her own sweat, the stab wounds forgotten. What the hell had just happened, and where the heck had Zeke disappeared off to? Hadn’t the fire been going just a few minutes ago? And where in the world had the moon gone?

Something was definitely wrong.

The silence within the void was so deafening, it made Faye’s ears ring, and her stab wounds had all but gone numb.

Had she… died?

If this was Hell, it was a lot less… terrifying than Faye imagined it to be. Where were the souls of the damned being tortured for all of eternity? Where were all of Faye’s victims who deserved to persecute her mercilessly? The fire and brimstone? Death had never been an experience she feared, but now that she was dead, what was she supposed to do..?

All the abyss did was leave her feeling cold and empty.

“Hello?!” Faye cupped her hands over her mouth as she hollered, listening to her voice echo back in a near mocking cry. “I’m ready for damnation, but I need a sign!”

Faye’s lips twitched down. Was death supposed to be ironic? She was born into this world with Zeke, so it made sense for him to be there when she died? Was that it? She was cradled in Dina’s womb by Zeke, and now, Faye’s tomb had been in Zeke’s arms? If there was a god, they had a sick sense of humor, that was for sure.

“You sound like you’re at peace with your recent death.”

The voice made the hair on Faye’s arms stand, a shiver wracking through her spine. It sounded a little distorted, but there was no denying that it was her own voice at the base of it all.

Slowly, the scout captain turned, glacial green eyes meeting an identical pair that seemed to blink owlishly at her. Brown hair cascaded down her shoulders, framing the woman’s face. Her lips had been pulled thin while her brows had arched, likely observing Faye the same way she was doing to her. They even wore the same clothes or would have, if not for Faye still being half-naked with a bloody pelvis and torso.

“Well?” She prompted, snapping Faye out of her thoughts. “Are you?”

“Sorry?” Faye mumbled, trying to calm her racing heart. “I, uh— I don’t think I got the question.” The words sounded dumber than she thought they would, but it was easier just to be blunt about her apparent confusion.

“A lot of people are afraid of death — they’ve all got unresolved business, they’re scared of the unknown, they weren’t ready to die,” She listed, counting the reasons off on her fingers. “But you aren’t fighting it; you’re trying to drown yourself in the flow of it. I guess what I meant to ask was whether you’re actually at peace with your death or if you’re faking it.”

The Scout Captain tilted her head, trying to steel her frayed nerves. Seeing her identical lookalike stirred an eerie feeling within the pit of her stomach, setting her consciousness on high alert.

“I’m not entirely sure,” Faye earnestly responded. “I have a lot of people I would have liked to say goodbye to, but I also have a lot of people I want to see again.” Her head swam with the ghosts of her past, Orwell, all of her victims, the men in the trenches, Mike... “I’ve known I wouldn’t be entering Paradise since I was a kid, and because of that realization, I’ve come to terms with the idea of Hell. But judging from the lack of fire and brimstone, I’d wager I haven’t quite made it there yet.”

“Big words for such a small woman.”

“Like you’re one to talk,” Faye snorted. “We’re exact replicas of each other.” Or they would be if Faye were wearing trousers and if the doppelganger wore the wings of freedom pendant. “Speaking of which, who are you?”

“I thought that was obvious,” Not-Faye deadpanned. “I’m you.”

“Alright, alright, enough with acting like this is some trashy novel,” The Scout Captain sarcastically grumbled. “Are you part of my subconscious or something? Did my brain decide to intervene because of all the sh*t I went through today? Are you secretly God or the devil?”

“Last time I checked, the title of ‘God’ made us uncomfortable.” Not-Faye’s shoulders rolled back, holding her chin high. “Walk with me.”

“There’s not really a whole lot to see,” Faye pointed out, unyielding to her doppelganger’s demand. “So, where exactly are you planning to take me to?” Her suspicion was only increasing by the second, and she wasn’t sure she trusted her mirror image’s intentions.

“Nowhere,” She shrugged. “Sometimes, it’s easier to gather your thoughts when you’re doing something mindless. I can’t imagine you’re as calm about the night you’ve just lived through as you’re pretending to be, and I figured that maybe a little stroll might help take the edge off.”

“Fair enough.” Faye abated. This wasn’t the ideal situation, but maybe a walk would help quell the anxiety brewing in the pits of her stomach. “So, this is weird, right?” She fell into step with the bizarre woman, matching her pace with uncertain steps. “I mean because I always thought that when I died, it would be a brutal afterlife.”

“You seem to have this notion inside your head that you’re at fault for everything wrong in the world,” She kept her gaze forward, unwilling to look at Faye as she spoke. “Who taught you to carry that burden alone? To search and long for meaningless repentance in which you aren’t responsible for? I thought Levi already had this discussion with you.”

“He did, but—”

“But what?” She countered, finally pinning Faye with an icy stare. “You did what you had to do. The men you gunned down, the people who died from your poison, the spies, Orwell, Mike ,” She listed. “None of them blame you for what you did to make ends meet.”

“Yeah? Well, how would you know?” Inwardly, Faye knew she was being stubborn, but she couldn’t just let go of the guilt that had been festering inside her for the last twenty years. “Dina couldn’t even look me in the eye before she got turned into a titan because all she saw was a blood-stained little—”

“You saw Zeke and what dwelling in the past did to him,” Her voice had only raised slightly, claiming the conversation in a single breath. “Don’t let that happen to you.”

She said it like Faye had a choice in the matter. Like she was going to—

“Oh. I’m not staying dead, am I?” Faye questioned, huffing out a sigh. “By the way you’re talking, you make it sound like I’m not done murdering people.” She couldn’t help the tired tone or the way her dark circles seemed to deepen beneath her eyes.

“It’s okay to grieve for those you’ve wronged, but don’t let it consume you.” She laid a comforting hand on Faye’s shoulder, offering a small smile. “Learn from your mistakes, and rise above them. Strive to emerge victorious from your battles, but be merciful to your enemies. Death isn’t always inevitable, but be swift in delivering their souls.”

“Delivering their souls?” The Scout Captain quietly murmured. “I don’t like playing God; why should their souls be left in my hands? Haven’t I done enough?”

“You’re part of the royal family,” Her lips strained to hold the reassuring curve. “You were always meant to rule over the Eldians. To lead them to victory, Faye. You have your entire life ahead of you, but you won’t be able to move forward if you don’t choose to move your legs.”

“What if I can’t? I—I can’t even carry on the royal bloodline anymore,” Subconsciously, Faye’s hand moved over her mutilated uterus, ghosting over the crusted blood and shredded skin. “I was never meant to hold another life, whether it be in the palm of my hand or in my womb. I can’t—”

“You can, and you will.” She sharply interjected. “You’re leading yourself into a spiral, Faye. If you don’t snap out of it when you’re brought back, you’re going to go insane. Zeke isn’t going to stand for a disobedient wife, and Marley will force you back into the military. Do you want that?” Her fingers squeezed Faye’s shoulder, just enough to help get her point across. “You’re known as the God of War in Marley; do you really want them to put that title to good use? To abandon Eren and let him stray down the same path as Zeke? Do you?”

“Well, I—”

“You’ve never been particularly indecisive,” She stepped closer to Faye, bringing herself nose to nose with her lookalike. “So what’s stopping you now? When have you ever been the type to bend to other people’s will? I thought you knew better?”

“I’m—I’m not.” Faye sucked in a breath, trying to rifle through the thoughts circling around inside her head. “I just—”

“You’re going to drown in self-pity, Faye. Make up your mind, and choose the outcome you think you’ll come to regret the least.”

It was like a small dam broke loose inside of Faye. Her eyes started to burn, welling up with tears, while her lungs took in shallow breaths of air. Reality was starting to dawn on the scout captain, her doppelganger's words finally sinking in.

“I—I want to stay,” Faye forced out. “I don’t want to go back to Marley. I can’t. Not with him.” Her words clung to the back of her throat, coming out in wet gasps while tears stained her cheeks. “ I don’t want to drown in self-pity. ”

“You know what you need to do, then.” Her hands reached out, circling around Faye’s shoulders to pull her into a hug, her own eyes beginning to brim with tears. “Fight for your freedom .”

*

“Faye?” Zeke was starting to panic, his hand finding his twin’s in a moment of weakness. She was freezing to the touch, and when he tilted her head back, he couldn’t help the sharp inhale of air when his eyes caught on hers, which remained unblinking and void of life.

His twin was dead.

“Come on,” He breathed, moving off her knees to pull her entire body down to the ground. “You can’t die yet, Faye.” His gaze lingered on his mother’s wedding band, heart clenching tightly in his chest. “Not like this.”

Zeke had never been great when it came to medical procedures. Sure, as a kid, he was forced to volunteer at his father’s hospital, but he had never actually worked on a patient before. Then, later on, he sat through the mandatory first aid courses that all Warriors needed to sit through and learn, but it wasn’t like he had ever put that knowledge to use since he regenerated.

No.

He needed to calm down. If he panicked, all hope was lost.

Slowly, he tilted Faye’s head and listened for any breathing. It hadn’t been long, maybe half a minute since she died. When he heard nothing, he muttered out a few choice swear words before he clasped his hands and started compressions.

He heard and felt the crack the second time his hands dipped down, and he couldn’t help the wince. That sounded painful.

Zeke did his best to count the compressions and keep them rhythmic, but in reality, it was highly likely that they were erratic and untimed, just as frayed as his nerves were. Then, after thirty, he dipped his head down, pinched Faye’s nose, tilted her head back, and breathed air into her lungs.

He narrowed his eyes from behind his glasses, but then he started back up on the compressions.

There was no way Faye was dead. Not when he was so close to getting her back home. To marrying her. She just needed to make it a few more hours, and then they’d be on the ships, where she could receive proper medical attention for her stab wounds and the ribs he had just cracked.

“Come on, Faye,” Zeke growled, forcing his hands to continue their movements. “I know you’re in there. You’re not getting away from me that easily, do you understand? Not when we’re so close to being together.” His hands pushed down, and he heard another rib give way beneath the pressure.

Again, he tilted his twin’s neck back, pinched her nose, and met her lips with his own. There was no way in hell that he was giving up on her yet.

He breathed the air into Faye’s mouth, forcing it down her throat and into her lungs. He was halfway through the second bout of oxygen when Faye twitched underneath him before she broke into a coughing fit.

Faye’s lungs burned as she choked on the foreign air, trying to steady her mind and process what the hell was happening. Never in her life had she felt so disoriented and flayed by whiplash at her circ*mstances. The last hour felt fuzzy inside her head, as though she couldn’t quite recall everything. But then, her hand met her abdomen, and the warm blood startled her back to reality, dousing her in the recent events.

Her uterus felt like it was on fire, not to mention her ribs rattled with every breath she took, begging her just to sit down and take it easy. Every inhale felt like her chest was caving in on itself, and every exhale had her wheezing out a groan while clutching tightly to her ribs.

“Let me guess,” Faye sucked in a shallow gasp of air. “CPR?”

“We should bandage your ribs to prevent them from—”

“I’ve already gone into—” sh*t, her ribs were really testing Faye’s basic ability to breathe. This wasn’t good. “—Cardiac arrest. I need to finish—” In and out went another painful bout of air. “Stitching this.”

Zeke helped Faye sit back up against the tree, resuming his position on her knees, but this time, he kept his eyes trained on his sister, keeping his groin away from her knees. He couldn’t let himself get distracted again; he had almost cost Faye her life.

Faye tried to move swiftly, doing her best to block out the pain. Her eyes had gone bleary with tears again, but she blinked them away. She didn’t have time to cry. She needed to finish sewing her flesh together and wrapping her ribs so she could get the hell out of there.

Whatever f*cked up little game her subconscious played on her while she was out cold had knocked The wind out of Faye. She wasn’t even sure what had happened in the afterlife or what the purpose of the pep-talk her doppelgänger gave her, but whatever it was, it was meant to be taken seriously. If she thought Faye could escape, then she needed to at least try.

Her hands worked on muscle memory, and instead, Faye focused on trying to think of a way to fight Zeke off. Her chances of escaping had lowered drastically when he stabbed her, but now that she had at least two broken ribs? It had to be less than a 10% chance of success.

Then came the hazy memories from when she had died. She still wasn’t sure what to make of the entire experience, but if her clone thought she could make it out alive, then she couldn’t let herself (?) down. She was right. Faye needed to make a decision and stick with it. One way or another, she was going to get away.

“You had me worried,” Zeke spoke softly, afraid of startling his twin when she looked so concentrated. “That was almost three minutes your heart stopped.”

“You’re lucky I didn’t make it to four,” She spoke through gritted teeth, holding back groans of pain. “That’s when the—the brain cells start to deteriorate.” Faye gasped in heady breaths of air. It was by pure luck that Faye hadn’t stayed dead, but she was… well, she was frazzled by the experience but determined to make her doppelganger proud. She was brought back for a reason, which meant that she couldn’t just give up yet.

“I thought it was six,” Zeke mumbled, feeling her leg give a small jerk while he held it down.

“Four,” Faye repeated. “Four minutes until the—the cells start deteriorating without oxygen, and—and five before the patient goes brain—brain dead.” Her memory about the last few minutes might have been shoddy, but her medical prowess was unrivaled. She couldn’t forget something as important as how long the brain took before it ceased to function. “You should have helped—helped out at the hospital more.”

“You know I was never good with that,” Zeke gave a small smile, hoping to come off innocent.

“Good or not, it’s valuable knowledge,” Faye heaved in a breath that barely reached the base of her trachea before it was expelled again. “Ask grandpa when you get back.” As much as she hated to admit it, the conversation was helping her tune out the pain and the itch to wash her hands of all the blood they were covered in.

“We.” Zeke corrected. “When we get back.”

And just as fast as Faye had come to appreciate the small talk, did she come to loathe it.

“Yeah,” she lied, hands quivering as she took in another shallow intake of air, feeling her ribs press in dangerously. “You’re right.”

*

Alexander’s nerves were quickly disintegrating. First, Erwin had been led away by the military police, then came the news that titans had breached Wall Rose, then he realized that Faye was still stuck in titan-territory, then Levi informed him that he was now an official member of Squad Levi and Faye, (Stupid, in his opinion, because Faye’s name should have been first.) then Levi forbid his from accompanying Hange and Eren from riding out of Ehrmic to the front lines to find Faye, and now… Now he had lost the only thing he had left of Faye: Beef.

f*cking Beef.

He turned around for one minute, and the f*cking cat was gone, nowhere to be seen. Faye was going to kill him when she got back.

If she got back.

And it wasn’t like Beef could have been with Faye this time since he had brought him to Ehrmich with him. This was a f*cking sh*t show.

“Come on,” Al’ whispered, voice echoing off the stone walls in the torchlight. “Here, Beefy, Beefy, Beefy,” He let out a soft whistle, hoping the cat would remember to come when called for. When the furball didn’t magically reappear, he pressed his palms to his eyes, shuddering in a breath.

Levi stood a few paces behind; his hands shoved into his pockets while he watched Alexander. The boy was truly a mess. His hair — which, to be fair, was typically tousled — looked like he had run a stressed hand through it a few hundred times, and his shirt had come untucked in the back, while his leather jacket hung loosely off his shoulders. Alexander was digging himself an early grave with how anxious he was over Faye.

“Oi, the cat is fine,” Levi sighed, decidedly making his presence known. “It’s napping in my room.”

“In your—in your room?” Alexander choked on the air as he incredulously spun around. “He’s— when did Beef weasel his way into your room? He doesn’t even like you! You don’t even like him! What?!”

Levi shrugged, “sh*tty cat kept pawing and yelling at my door, and he only stopped when I let him in.” In truth, Levi really had tried to ignore Beef’s pleas to be granted entry to his room, and he had fully intended to kick the damn cat out; but when he opened the door, the stupid thing pounced forward and somehow found the canister of Faye’s black tea that he set down on the window sill. The cat recognized Faye’s scent just as well as he did. “Come on. You can remove him from my room.”

“You should really let me check your ankle and thigh,” Al’ offered, falling into step a few paces behind Levi. “Faye wouldn’t be too happy if she came back and found out I was neglecting you.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re hiding your limp,” Al’ sassily corrected, narrowing his eyes at the slight stagger Levi walked with. “At least let me re-fasten the bandages. It’s the least I can do for taking care of Beef and keeping an eye on him in your room.” And for putting up with his childish behavior.

“No.”

“You wouldn’t decline if Faye were the one offering,” Alexander grumbled. “You always give her special treatment.”

Levi said nothing, instead choosing to let out a soft sigh while he kept his eyes forward. Of course, Alexander had noticed his soft spot for Faye. She just made it so easy to accept help, and she wasn’t bratty like the rest of the recruits. Not to mention that she knew how to clean, made a decent pot of tea, and didn’t complain about his lack of social skills.

“I can’t blame you,” Al’ filled the silence. “Something about her just sucks you in, and before you know it, she’s become one of the most important people in your life. I watched it happen with you, and Petra, and Kenny—”

“Kenny?” Levi glanced back, halting his steps to glare up at Ral sharply. “The Ripper?”

“Yeah, I never really knew him. Faye always kept me away from her side hustle, but I caught glances of him through the window every now and again,” Alexander shrugged, oblivious to the deepening frown on his captain lips and how tense the atmosphere had suddenly become. “From what I hear, the guy has a pretty soft spot for Faye, though. Saw her getting riled up by a few of her lower-class customers and conveniently came back the next month with the excuse that he was low on money but could offer to teach her how to use a knife in exchange for some poison and drugs.”

Inwardly, Levi was spiraling. He knew the way Faye handled a knife was familiar —too familiar— but he hadn’t bothered asking for a name because he figured Kenny wasn’t the type to teach just anyone. sh*t. It was like the more he thought he knew about Faye, the more he realized how surface-level his understanding of her was.

“When was the last time he came around?” Levi brusquely questioned, moving his feet forward to continue to walk back to his room.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Al’ scratched his chin, trying to think back. “Maybe like… Five years ago? Or was it six?”

“You think he’ll go after Faye if he finds out she’s joined the Scouting Regiment?” Levi stiffly asked. Five years ago… The last time Levi thought he saw Kenny had been when he was still just a kid, and now he was finding out that Faye had seen— Spoken to him , even— five years ago? Maybe Kenny abandoned her like he did to Levi…

“I dunno,” Alexander teetered over his words, trying to think of a good way to explain his thoughts. “I think he and Faye have some kind of understanding. Kind of like a ‘You don’t expose me, and I won’t expose you,’ kind of thing.”

Levi let the new information marinate inside his head for a few seconds. The first lesson Kenny had ever taught Levi was that he couldn’t trust anyone, but from what he understood of his and Faye’s relationship, the bastard had broken his number one rule. What kind of sh*tty criminal—

“And you haven’t heard about anything after Shiganshina fell?” Best to cover all of his bases. Levi would need to have a nice, long conversation with Faye about her business deal with Kenny. He was too dangerous not to be informed about. And… and maybe a little part of Levi felt betrayed and… wounded.

“No, he kind of went awol. Stopped coming by the shop, stopped sending notices, pretty much just fell off the face of the earth,” Al’ supplied. “I’d imagine the Military Police have an even bigger bounty on Kenny the Ripper’s head than they do for Faye, too, but it’s not like they know how to do their job, so it’s not hard to imagine that he’s probably living it up right under all our noses.”

Yeah, Levi could picture that. The Military Police really were useless, and Kenny wasn’t exactly stupid.

“Oi,” The short captain’s hand found the doorknob, pushing it open and stepping inside with Ral hot on his trail. “Get your sh*tty cat and get out.” He had gotten all the information he needed, and his head was starting to throb.

Alexander didn’t need to be told twice, so he stepped forward, easily locating the call of fur on the window sill. Gently, Alexander scooped Beef up, feeling him stir. Then, the boy turned around and started towards the door.

“Ral, get some sleep. You’re useless if you’re strung out and sleep-deprived.” Levi pinned the boy with an icy glare, watching him retreat from his room.

“Says you,” Al’ muttered under his breath. “I’ll see you in the morning, Captain.” He held Beef to his chest as he exited Humanity’s Strongest’s room, leaving the captain in the solitude his room offered.

Levi closed the door behind the boy, sighing into the darkness illuminated by a single candle. Ral was insufferable, but if the boy really had lost Faye, he would undoubtedly need to keep himself busy, and Levi could step up to the plate to train him. Maybe he could learn some discipline and self-restraint.

Levi eased himself into the chair at the desk, pulling his face into his hands. Why did it feel like Faye was at the center of everything? And now he wasn’t even sure if the sh*tty doctor was even still alive. Erwin would no doubt be crushed if his prized medic turned up dead in the morning.

What was he thinking?

Levi was the one who was going to be crushed. The last words he had spoken to Faye were him calling her a sh*tty doctor. Why couldn’t he have just complimented her instead? And he hadn’t even thought to ask for that sh*tty ring of hers. Something about the metal band just made him feel… Made him feel like she would come back to him — if only to retrieve her mother’s wedding ring.

He sighed, peeking out the window. There, sat high in the sky, was the Constellation of Beef. He was never going to be able to look at it again if Faye didn’t make it out of this alive.

*

Faye’s skin crawled every time Zeke laid his hands on her, and since he had insisted on helping her into her trousers, she had no choice but to endure her twin’s fingers digging into her skin.

She had noticed that Zeke would look down every so often, and his eyes would linger on her neck. He kept staring at it with barely concealed annoyment, and the only conclusion Faye could reach was that he had bruised her when he choked her out earlier.

“How are those bandages on your ribs holding up?” He softly questioned, helping to tuck in Faye’s shirt. “Your chest was already starting to bruise earlier.”

“It’s okay,” Faye took in another shallow breath. She was lying through her teeth, but if she could lure Zeke into thinking she was compliant, she might have an easier time escaping. “You did what you had to do.”

Zeke let out a relieved sigh, bending down to lean his forehead against her shoulder. He couldn’t even bring himself to speak, but by God, was he ever grateful that she wasn’t holding it all against him.

“Come on,” He breathed, fingers looping into her belt loops to guide her. “We should try to get some sleep before dawn breaks. The ships aren’t exactly quiet, and you might get a little seasick.”

Faye’s fingers twitched when her eyes flitted to the guns. ‘Not yet.’ She reminded herself. ‘Just a little longer.’ Zeke’s beard dug into her shirt, scratching her skin beneath the fabric as he spoke, and she forced herself not to wince. She had been through worse. She could make it out of this alive.

“Yeah,” Faye agreed. “You’re right.”

Her entire chest burned, searing the wind right out of her lungs with every breath she took in while Zeke led her to the base of a tree. She clutched onto Mike’s cloak, fingers tightening around the neatly folded clothing. It was the last thing she had of Mike, and she’d be damned if she let it out of her sight.

Her body screamed at her not to make any sudden movements, even when Zeke leaned his back against the tree and tugged her down, so she sat nestled between his legs with her back against his chest. Realistically, this was supposed to be the most accommodating sleeping pose she was going to find since it meant her ribs wouldn’t be jostling around in her sleep, but her pelvis throbbed when her butt met the floor, skin seemingly stretching around the sutures.

“You’re covered in blood and sweat; you don’t look very comfortable.” Zeke softly murmured, leaning his head back while his knees lazily cradled Faye, arms carefully sliding around her torso. “When we get to the ships, you can take a shower.”

“Do they have hot water?” She didn’t even know why she was asking; it wasn’t like she intended to return with him in the first place. A hot shower really did sound nice, though, especially considering the dull ache in her muscles and ribs…

Zeke hummed, nodding. “Are the walls really that behind in technology?” He assumed they must have been a little less advanced considering the rifle Faye had originally used and brought back, but he hadn’t expected them to be that… primal.

“We get by,” Faye shrugged. “It’s just a different way of life here.”

“The pendant you wear,” Zeke started slowly, eying the chain that hung from the back of her neck. “I saw the same crest on a few others. What is it?”

“My regiment’s crest,” The exhaustion was hitting her full force, and she strained herself, trying to hide the lilt in her voice and keep her eyes open. She still needed to execute her plan, and she couldn’t do that if she fell asleep. “They’re called the Wings of Freedom.”

Zeke repeated the name, tasting it on his tongue. “And what does your regiment do? You make it sound like there’s more than one.”

“The Scouts go on expeditions outside the walls so we can learn more about the titans, the Garrison look after the Walls, and the Military Police are basically just glorified police officers. Pretty useless, if you ask me, though.” Her words were slurring together, the pain finally subsiding enough for her to get comfortable. “Ten whole years, and they didn’t even execute me.”

“That was when you were running a hospital out of your tea shop?” Orwell had detailed her illicit practices, of course, but Faye wasn’t biting back with sarcastic comments, and Zeke was enjoying catching up with his twin - even if she sounded worse for wear and tired out of her mind.

Faye winced when she yawned, a small whine sounding out while she nodded. “I’m glad I got sentenced to the Scouts. At least I could have repaid Erwin, Levi, and Mike for taking Eren in.”

“Eren?” Zeke’s brows furrowed. There hadn’t been any mention of an Eren in any of John Orwell’s reports. “I’m not sure I’ve heard of him.”

The Scout Captain’s spine stiffened, snapping awake. She slipped up by mentioning Eren. She should have omitted his name entirely while in Zeke’s presence. The Warrior was clearly desperate for some semblance of family, and if he found out that he had a half-brother, there was no telling what stunt he might try to pull.

“New hire at The Tea House who was helping me develop medicine,” Faye lied, silently praying that Zeke bought it. “He got caught, and Erwin insisted the Scouting Regiment take him in.”

“I see,” Zeke’s chest rumbled as he spoke. “Was he important to you?”

“Yeah,” Her chest burned wetly, “He was like a little brother to me.”

Zeke thoughtfully nodded, the pad of his thumbs rubbing lazy circles into Faye’s sides, while the conversation slowly died, leaving the two to try and sleep. Zeke seemed to be relatively at peace, likely comfortable to just be near Faye while she wasn’t snapping back hostile retorts at him.

Faye, meanwhile, swallowed the bile that threatened to rise up her throat. Her medical bag rested on her lap while her fingers grazed the spot where the stab wounds began. Her time in death had been fleeting, but whatever prospect of new life Faye previously held in her body would never grow. She, at least, had the chance to be resuscitated, but the eggs in her ovaries had no chance of ever living long enough to see the light of day.

When she got back to the walls, she would need to patch herself up and rest properly.

It was bizarre being cradled by Zeke again. When she had woken up after she had first been kidnapped, she had groggily mistaken her twin for their father. Both of them reeked of coffee and cologne, but now that Faye was so close to Zeke again, she could pick up the faint scent of cigarettes too.

She would need to quit smoking if that were the case. Faye didn’t want to associate any of her pastimes with Zeke, not after the night he put her through. Killing Mike, raping her, stabbing her, and sending her into the afterlife before ripping her back to the world of the living. Her head was still throbbing from the day’s worth of events, which didn’t seem like they were going to be ending any time soon.

Faye let out a careful sigh, her ribs pulsating at the movement. She was going to make it out. She had to. All she needed to do was be patient; Zeke would fall asleep sooner or later, and then she could make her getaway. It was just a matter of waiting.

Slowly but surely, Zeke’s thumb slowed to a stop, and his breathing evened out while his head slumped against the tree.

He must have tuckered himself out with his psychotic tendencies.

The Scout Captain waited a few seconds before her hand inched forward, delving into her bag silently. If she woke Zeke up before she got the needle in, he’d likely put up a fight, and she wasn’t exactly in any condition to throw punches.

Her fingers wrapped around one of the syringes, quietly pulling it out to read the label before she removed the cap. There was a 50/50 chance of this actually working since Zeke was a titan, and it wasn’t like there were any studies done to research the effects of anesthesia on titan shifters.

At least, there weren’t any inside the walls. Marley was a different story.

Faye held her breath, trying not to move around too much for fear that she would accidentally wake Zeke up. She pulled the fabric of his pants tight near his knee, and she hovered the needle above. Ideally, she would have disinfected the area first and been in a sterile environment, but it wasn’t like she had much of a choice.

Her hand came down in a quick motion, the needle piercing straight through Zeke’s pants and skin. Faye waited a moment, just to see if he would stir, and when he didn’t, she gently squeezed the top, injecting him with propofol.

Ideally, propofol would have been used if Faye were in an emergency on the field and a soldier needed immediate surgery, but seeing as it was the only sedative she packed, it would need to make due. The soldier pulled the needle out, capping it again before she dropped it back into her bag. It wasn’t the most sterile way to dispose of the needle, but it got the job done for the time being.

Two minutes ticked by before she held Zeke’s hand up and let it fall to the ground limply. Definitely knocked out.

The Scout Captain grunted, ribs throbbing and pelvis burning as she forced herself to her feet. As long as she took her time moving around, she had a pretty decent chance of making it to safety alive.

She turned around, intending to rifle through her twin’s pockets to grab his knife, but she froze upon the sight. Zeke sat, for the first time since Faye had laid eyes on him in eighteen years, completely innocent and vulnerable. His eyes were closed, and in the light of the fire, the lines beneath his eyes and the creases in his forehead looked more pronounced. His palms were faced upward on his legs while his lips had relaxed. He looked older, but something about the vulnerable position made the image of a seven-year-old Zeke flash in her head, begging her to stay.

“I’m sorry, Zeke,” Faye whispered, kneeling carefully so as not to injure herself further. “It’s my fault you’re like this. I couldn’t stay then, and I can’t stay now.” Maybe if she had stayed, the current events wouldn’t have come to pass, and she wouldn’t feel the need to run every time she looked at him.

Faye stood, clutching her ribs to help support them before she turned, and felt the familiar twitch in her fingers — a habit Faye assumed she had trained out of herself — when she laid eyes on the rifles. Her steps were slow and staggered while grunting, but she pushed forward. Her fingers latched around the sleek, polished exterior of the modernized rifle before she swung it onto the shoulder.

She fled into the dead of night, refusing to look back at her twin.

That would be the second time Faye abandoned him.

Chapter 23: 19. Titans Galore

Chapter Text

Alexander sat next to Captain Levi in a small cart while Pastor Nick sat across from them. The sun beat down steadily, and the only escape from the heat was in the shade provided by the nearby buildings.

“Hey! Levi, where are you hiding all the titans?” One of the Military Police called, chuckling with his buddies.

Alexander scoffed, trying to keep his bitterness at bay. This wasn’t the time to be joking about all the f*cking titans, Faye was still out there, and the fact that she hadn’t returned yet was setting him on edge.

“Problem?” Levi questioned, blinking innocently. “You seem eager to be eaten alive, soldier.” The Captain felt Alexander shift uncomfortably next to him, but he ignored it. “Sorry, we couldn’t make that happen for you today. Plenty of opportunities outside the wall if you’re looking. Lots of scouting expeditions. I’d be more than happy for the help.” Then, after a moment of silence, he condescendingly added: “We could all fight titans together.”

“Well, you know,” The MP awkwardly shuffled beneath Levi’s cold stare. “There’s our work in the interior, so—”

“So what?” Alexander piped in, finally turning around to acknowledge the soldier. “You think that just because you work in the interior, it’s okay to get off scot-free for mocking us? Is that it?” His frustration was leaking out beneath the confines of his lips, scalding the MPs. “Faye Jaeger slipped through your fingers for ten whole years; what does that tell us? Huh? You guys are useless; the Scouts probably wouldn’t even have any use for insufferable idiots like you.”

“What did you say?!”

“At ease, soldier,” Levi growled, the air thickening with static electricity. “Alexander was only stating the facts. The best you’d be good for is titan fodder. I doubt you would last for more than one or two expeditions—unless you’re willing to test that theory?” He raised his eyebrows, daring either one of them to speak up and contradict his words.

“Hey!” Another soldier called from within the crowds. “The advance squad is back! Go, tell Commander Pyxis!”

“You think there’s any news on Faye?” Alexander couldn’t help the hope that bloomed in his chest with the question. He’d been a nervous wreck since he had gotten news of Wall Rose being breached the other day, and he was waiting with bated breath for an update on his best friend.

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Levi warned despite silently yearning for the same thing. “It’s already been a full twenty-four hours since the Wall was breached, and we have no idea what the status is on the titans yet.”

“Yeah,” Alexander got to his feet, following his captain’s example. “I guess.” He followed close behind as Levi got off the wagon and joined the crowds to listen to the advance squad’s report. Commander Erwin and Pyxis were already among the crowds, and it seemed like Al’ and Levi had gotten in just at the tail-end of the status report.

“I see,” Pyxis murmured. “No breach as far as you could tell, correct?”

“That’s correct, sir.”

No breach? Alexander’s fingers played with the hem of his untucked shirt. That didn’t sound right. If there was no breach, then where had Faye gone, and what were all those titans that had been seen yesterday by a few of Mike’s squad members?

“I see,” Pyxis hummed. “Just as I thought.”

“But sir, a situation has developed,” The soldier scrambled to continue speaking, panting as he gulped in air. “You see, we ran into another group on the way back to Trost. It was the Scout unit led by Section Commander Hange, and there were recruits from the 104th Cadet Corps with them, none of whom had equipment.”

Faye and Mike should have been there with them, shouldn’t they? Those were all the kids they were supposed to watch over...

“This may sound crazy, sir, but three of them were titans.”

Alexander’s blood ran cold. Faye was dealing with… three more titan shifters? He had seen first hand the injuries Annie had caused, but if there were another three in the 104th, then how badly was Faye wounded?

“What the— hang on a sec,” Jean stepped forward, face lined with shock. “Seriously? You mean like there were three… more? But… who were they?” He hadn’t even let a heartbeat pass before Jean snapped his eyes up to watch Sasha, and he aggressively barked out, “Who, damn it?!”

“Actually, I, um...” Sasha startled, her water canteen jumping in her hands as she stammered.

“Jean, calm down,” Erwin laid a hand on Jean’s shoulder, willing the boy to take a breath. “What happened when their titan forms were revealed?”

“The Scouts faced them,” The soldier was sweating, a haunted glimmer shifting in his beady little eyes. “The Armored titan and the Colossal head-on...” It felt like Alexander couldn’t breathe; his chest was caving in on itself with every word the soldier let out. “But by the time our unit arrived on the scene, it was… too late. I’m sorry.”

Too late? What the hell was 'Too late' supposed to mean?!

“And did you happen to see Faye Jaeger?” Erwin spoke up, holding tightly to his calm facade.

“She left with Squad Leader Mike to draw the titans away,” Sasha spoke up, stammering over her words under the intense stare her commander gave. “I haven’t seen her since.”

“Scouts, start preparing your horses. We’re heading to assess the damage to Squad Leader Hange’s location and retrieve Eren.” Erwin barked, startling the onlookers. “I want to leave within the next thirty minutes.”

“Watch the sh*tty pastor,” Levi muttered out to Alexander before he stepped forward, clenching his fists. This was the opposite of an ideal situation. Every time he took his eyes off one of his comrades, they turned up dead.

“Levi, a word,” Erwin jutted his chin to the side, motioning towards a small corner where they could talk privately.

“What are the odds she’s still alive?” Levi quietly asked, rubbing his temples. It wasn’t that he wanted to know; he needed to know. Some morbid part of him needed to brace himself for the worst, and Erwin’s predictions were typically spot on.

“Slim to none.”

Levi’s guts squeezed together, contorting around his stomach while he struggled to respond. He should never have let Faye out of his sight. What was he supposed to tell Alexander when the Scouts returned from retrieving Eren, and they came back without his best friend?

“On the off chance that we do find her, though,” Erwin carefully articulated, doing his best to push away the dull throb his heart gave at the thought of Faye. “I want to personally question and interrogate her.” He watched Levi’s face, searching for any indication of how he was feeling inside.

“Do you still expect us to co-captain a squad?” Humanity’s Strongest raised a brow, leaning against the wooden paneling of the building they were next to.

“I think it’s only fair, considering her penchant for attracting danger, don’t you?” The Commander challenged, steadfast in holding onto his authoritarian frown. “I think it would be wise of us to keep a close eye on her and keep her out of trouble.”

Levi scoffed, averting his eyes for a split second. “She’s not a dog, you know,” He met Erwin’s cold gaze with his own. “Don’t forget that she’s survived this long without our help.” A little part of Levi agreed with Erwin, but the voice inside his head kept nagging him, telling him that Faye wouldn’t appreciate being put on a leash and collar.

“I’m not trying to turn her into a dog. I need her to stay alive,” Erwin ran a hand through his hair, the lines on his face deepening. “She’s the best doctor within The Walls, and I’ll be damned if I let her slip through my fingers.”

Maybe it was in the lines around Erwin’s eyes, or the rugged sigh he blew past his lips — Hell, it could have even been the slight way his shoulders hunched forward — whatever it was, it made Levi purse his lips and bite back a sarcastic retort, choosing instead to take a deeper look at his friend and realize that Erwin Smith was just as worried about Faye as he was.

“You still worried about your humanity?”

“Do you really need to ask?” Erwin quietly shot back, steadily holding the gaze of Humanity’s Strongest. “I’m chipping away at the compassion that makes me human to preserve humanity as a whole, and I don’t know how many more hits my moral compass can take.” He was buckling under the pressure, and the thought of Faye being dead was only worsening his mental state.

“Stop spiraling,” Levi ordered. “I can see all your sh*tty thoughts on your face, so get a grip on yourself. You don’t have time to second guess any of your sh*tty decisions—”

“They’re not sh*tty—”

“They’re sh*tty, and you know it,” Levi was geared up now, and there was no stopping the low hiss that escaped his throat in every word. “Faye is probably dead right now, which means Eren is your first priority—”

“I know,” Erwin stressed, practically flinging Levi’s hand off his arm. “I’m already arranging a plan in my head—”

“If you don’t bring him back, Faye is never going to forgive us.”

Erwin’s shoulders tensed, lips pulling into a tight line while he glared down at Levi with thinly veiled irritation. All Levi was doing was worsening his already frayed conscience. He knew Faye was never going to forgive him regardless of whether or not she was still alive. She had the moral compass of a saint despite having been convicted of mass murder, and she would have given her life up for her little brother in an instant if she knew he had been kidnapped.

“He’s Humanity’s Last Hope,” The Commander bitterly muttered. “I’m well aware that he takes priority, and I’m determined to bring him back in one piece.”

“Oi,” Levi’s tone softened, mirroring his eyes. “The corps needs its commander, too. Don’t get killed while you’re out there.” It was all he could do to not sound like a complete and utter asshole, and his last words to Faye reverberated in his head, begging him not to insult Erwin before he was going to go into battle without him.

“Eren is more important,” Despite his firm belief, he gave a small nod, dipping his head to acknowledge Levi’s subtle compliment. “I’ll see to it that he returns.”

Levi watched his back as he marched off, barking orders to his men to ready their gear and get the horses ready. Inwardly, the pit in his stomach grew, begging him to ask Erwin to stay. He wasn’t sure if he could take another death so soon after Faye…

“Captain,” Alexander cupped his hands over his lips from the wagon with Pastor Nick. “Beef keeps crawling into your bag. Is it okay if I just leave him there?” He pointed a hand to the corner of the wagon, where a pair of paws were sticking out of Levi’s satchel.

“sh*tty cat,” Levi grumbled, turning his eyes to survey the scene as he approached his subordinate. It was obvious to him that the only reason the cat stuck its head in there was that it had sniffed out the tin of black tea that Faye smelled like. “Let him be,” He sighed, climbing the step ladder to sit next to Alexander.

“Let him— let him be?” Al’ dumbly echoed, scrunching his nose and furrowing his brows. “You feeling okay? First, you let Beef into your room last night, and now you’re letting him—”

“Don’t push your luck.”

*

It seemed, to Faye, that once the ball started rolling, it became exceedingly impossible to stop.

First, it had been Orwell, and finding out that he had once been a blurry figure of Faye’s past that she thought of from time to time, then came Zeke, and now… Now, it felt like her eyes were deceiving her. The exhaustion was starting to hit Faye harder than any titan could. That was over twenty-four hours she had stayed awake, and she was crashing and burning like a falling star. There was no other reason for the sight below her branch, but at the same time… it was so… it was so lifelike.

A dozen meters below the branch stood a reminiscent face, recalcitrant in grinning up at Faye. Despite having been eighteen years, the titan’s features hadn’t changed one bit, still baring a grin that stretched from ear to ear and royal blue eyes that peered into her soul. Its gaze never left Faye’s, carefully taking in her features, though it made no move to try and paw at her in an attempt to grab and eat her.

All of Faye’s ghosts from her years spent in Marley seemed hellbent on reappearing, and Dina Fritz’s titan form was no exception. They caught eye contact, neither moving a muscle and instead choosing to watch the other like a hawk.

It felt like her world was slowly tilting on its axis, threatening to throw Faye’s balance off and send her falling to her death. Sure, she had always known that her mother had been turned into a titan, but she hadn’t expected actually to encounter said titan in the wilderness. Then again, it wasn’t like Faye expected to encounter any other titan, having thought she would never venture outside the walls again.

Its lips extended into an unnatural smile, spanning the entire width of its face to gruesomely display its teeth, which looked to have yellowed and discolored over time. Its cheekbones were pulled high, letting the skin sag down, and the muscles around its mouth twitched every so often, straining against the tendons and skin. The ribs protruded from its chest in a sickly manner, and its arms were disproportionate to the rest of its body. It looked distorted and disfigured, but there was no mistaking it with any other titan.

“Hey, mom,” Faye whispered, tilting her head to the side to regard her titan-ized mother. Her lungs rattled with every breath she took, hitting the humid air in a wheeze. “Been a while.” She wasn’t sure how to feel, so she opted for quietly speaking to her mother, who probably didn’t even understand her. “I thought the Scouts would have already done you in.”

The titan tilted its head as though to question her daughter, golden hair catching on the orange glow from the sunset in the distance.

“I don’t know either,” She sighed, eyes burning. She was running on pure determination to stay awake, and if she were being honest, she felt a little neurotic due to the sleep deprivation. “It’s a wonder you haven’t run into your son.” Faye couldn’t bring herself to say Zeke’s name, and the memory of him made her stab wounds throb. “Almost feels like a family reunion; now, the only people I haven’t seen are dad and Eren today.”

Maybe… Maybe seeing Dina was comforting. It certainly wrought a lonely solace to Faye. Maybe it was just because she had spent half her day alone in the forest, and her mother’s titan form— no matter how off-putting — was familiar.

“He’s on a rampage, your son, I mean,” Another heavy sigh blew past Faye’s lips. “He’s… He’s not well in the head. I won’t even tell you about the things he did— just in case you’re actually listening.” Dina was still Zeke’s mother, and as much as Faye resented him, she wasn’t about to drag his name through the mud to his own mom. Dina would have had a heart attack if she knew about it all… "He wanted to take me back to Marley. I couldn’t do that to myself, not again. At least in The Walls, I can pretend that I’m killing titans based on self-preservation.”

The titan unlodged its jaw, gaping open its lips into a wide arc before it shut again. Was it… Was it trying to talk..? No. It must have just been her imagination. Her drowsiness was playing tricks on her.

“You missed out on a lot,” Faye continued, flexing her fingers. “Dad got remarried, you have a stepson who inherited two titans, I’m a captain in the Survey Corps, and I’m supposed to be the head medic - even though I’ve only saved a handful of lives so far -” She grumbled out the last part, trying to keep the conversation light. It wouldn’t do anyone well if Faye started crying again; she had spent more than enough time in the early morning light letting tears glisten down her cheeks. “And I have a cat named Beef.”

That was how Faye started to recount her entire life story to the titan, which seemingly stood and listened with rapt attention. Its eyes never left Faye, staring up with its disconcerting grin and glassy eyes. It didn’t shift or turn to look at the other titans that meandered around, merely patiently waited for Faye to finish.

She wasn’t even sure how long she droned on for, maybe an hour. It was cathartic to vent about the things she couldn’t tell anyone else. How betrayed she felt about Grisha who had neglected to tell her about his plan to give Eren two titans, how frustrated she was that a fifteen-year-old boy had the weight of the Walls riding on his shoulders, how tired she was of killing people, but how there looked to be no end in sight.

“I haven’t even told you the best part yet,” She huffed out a strangled breath of air, ribs contracting painfully. “I met these two guys, Levi and Erwin, and both of them just… get me. I like them. I like spending time with Levi, drinking tea and star gazing, and I like having philosophical discussions with Erwin and watching his brows knit together when he’s deep in thought.” Then came the familiar pang of denial twitching to life inside Faye’s chest. “I don’t think I’m going to see any of them again. Not Eren, or Alexander, or Levi, or Erwin, and to be honest, I… I don’t want to die alone. ”

It was a miracle Faye had made it to the Walls the first time, but now she didn’t have Grisha to keep her safe from all the other titans, and all she had was a sh*tty switchblade and a rifle. She might have had a chance if her ODM gear hadn’t been compressed into a hunk of metal, but then she would have had to worry about conserving fuel. There was no hope for her in sight. Sure, she could always travel at night, but there were only so many military rations and bottles of water Faye packed into her medical bag - not to mention that she was otherwise doomed if she ran into an abnormal halfway through the night.

“I died a few hours ago,” She felt tiny under her mother’s unwavering gaze. “I don’t know who I met in the afterlife, but they took on my face. Told me I still had things to do, but I don’t think they were right. I can only do so much, and I’m getting tired, mom.” Her hand brushed the stray hair away from her eyes while she leaned her head against the tree. “Death said something about the royal bloodline, but it’s not like anyone here would believe me. You and Zeke were the ones who looked regal. Dad and I… We were never meant to be royalty.”

Slowly, the titan’s hand lifted, holding its palm out to Faye. It didn’t move otherwise, just continued peering up at its daughter with a strained grin that twitched every so often.

The Scout Captain blinked, furrowing her brows. The titan didn’t look particularly hungry, but if it wasn’t trying to make a grab for Faye, then what the hell was it doing? It looked like Dina’s titan was reaching out the same way another human would hold hands, but it would be more like Dina holding onto Faye’s entire body with the size difference.

Maybe this was what Death had meant. Maybe she was supposed to embrace her royal status by leaping into her mother’s hand and die there. Talk about another womb to tomb metaphor; if Faye jumped, she would end up right back in her mother’s belly - but this time, it would be the end of her life instead of the beginning.

“Alright, mom,” Faye grunted, the wind getting knocked out of her lungs as she struggled to stand on her feet. Her stab wounds burned with every movement, begging her to stay seated, but she was nothing if not obstinate. “If it means getting to hug you one last time, then you can count me in.”

She was eighteen years overdue on her death and now seemed to be an appropriate time to let go of her mortality. Death wanted Faye to go back to her royal roots; well, this was as close as she would ever get.

Faye’s wounds throbbed as she stepped towards the end of her branch, and she took in a heady breath. “Now or never,” she whispered, bracing herself. Slowly, she stepped off the edge, the wind whipping her hair around her face while leaves and trees blurred together in the distance.

Her back hit the titan's outstretched palm, rebounding at the sheer force at which she landed. Her lungs felt like they were closing in on themselves while her ribs sweltered and lit her chest on fire. A few of her stitches had torn open, and the blood slowly seeped through her pants again.

The Scout Captain expected the titan’s fist to close around her body and to lift her into the air to dangle her above its maw, but the titan did no such thing. Faye didn’t dare move, her heart thudding in her chest. This was supposed to be the end for her. Why wasn’t the titan moving to eat her?

At first, Faye thought she was just disoriented and that she merely imagined it, but the longer she stayed cognizant of the situation, the more she realized that Dina had moved her hand to her chest, cradling Faye’s tiny form right above where her heart should have been.

“Mommy?” Faye breathed, turning a pair of wide, unblinking eyes to stare up at her mother. There was absolutely no way in hell. Titans weren’t supposed to be aware of the humans they longed to eat, so why was Dina gently holding Faye to her chest?

The titan’s gaze shifted down while it tilted its head to regard the woman. Its teeth were still bared in a daunting grin, but its eyes held a familiar softness, and its brows had relaxed, if only slightly. Was it… did it really recognize its own daughter?

She was jostled when the titan took a step away from the tree, taking Faye with it. The footsteps thundered and vibrated along the titan’s body, reverberating against the Scout Captain as she was held.

If Dina wasn’t going to eat Faye, then where the hell was she taking her?

The titan dawdled forward, leaving the confines of the forest and meandering out into an open field. There weren’t any other titans in sight, and the sun only continued to dip lower on the horizon. On the other side of the field laid another forest, likely the same one Faye had been dragged into by Zeke.

“Mom?” Faye’s heart skipped a beat when the titan’s footsteps picked up speed, racing through the open field at a breakneck pace. The horses couldn’t even tread land this quickly, and if Faye hadn’t been cradled to Dina’s chest, she was sure she would have been accidentally dropped because of how fast the titan raced forward.

The wind whipped Faye’s hair out, leaving her to squint and pull her hair out of the way. Why had Dina suddenly gone into turbo mode? What the hell was happening? Why wasn’t she eating Faye yet?

She heard it before she saw it, and when Faye craned her neck despite the throb in her ribs, her heart dropped into the pit of her stomach.

A titan was making a beeline straight towards Dina’s titan. And not just any normal titan, this one ran with purpose — intelligence. Its entire body looked to be covered in hardened, yellow skin, while underneath laid its tendons and muscles, barely exposed between the patches of impenetrable skin. Its teeth were grit together, and it used its arms to gain momentum as it carried on forward.

Then, as if things couldn’t get any worse, another titan came flying out of the thicket of trees, landing on the Armored Titan’s back while he pushed forward.

“What the hell?” Faye whispered, lungs pushing painfully against her ribs. Her insides were smoldering, and she was having a difficult time getting in a full breath without coughing the air back out immediately after. “Is that...” She squinted, trying to make out the small form that was rapidly approaching on the Armored Titan’s shoulder. “Is that Bertholdt? And who’s strapped to his back?” It almost felt like a fever dream, and she couldn’t tell if it was real or if she was hallucinating the entire scene. Maybe the lack of sleep had affected her a lot more than she originally anticipated...

The Armored Titan’s eyes darted to the titan carrying Faye, assessing its stature before its beady gaze locked onto Faye, and it tilted its head.

‘Must be Reiner,’ Faye realized. She supposed that the titan subsequently resembled the stocky teen in hindsight when she took a closer look. Both were muscled, had the same hairstyle, even the body movement, and the way it ran looked to be similar. It was a wonder Faye hadn’t noticed the similarities when she had first met Reiner.

She assumed Reiner would just carry on without sparing her a second glance, but Faye was proven wrong when his fist swung out, socking Dina’s face with enough power to force the titan to stagger back a few steps, palm tilting just enough for Faye to slide down. One second, she was sailing toward the ground — doomed to die on impact, but at the last second, Reiner’s hand hurtled forward, and she was being clutched tightly in his grasp while he hauled ass away from the scene.

“Reiner,” Faye gasped, her ribs setting fuel to the scalding hot sensation inside her chest. “Reiner, my—my ribs—broken—stop squeezing me.” The words kept getting stuck in the back of her throat, and she could feel the skin stretching uncomfortably around the sutures she had stitched herself with the night before. She had already torn two of them, and if a third ripped through her skin, she was going to die from blood loss — permanently this time.

“Reiner, I’ve got her,” Bertholdt called, sweat beading down his temple as he tactfully tied Faye’s wrists together while she was still held in the clutches of the Armored Titan. Slowly, the fingers relented, loosening their grip while Faye floundered to get a decent-sized breath into her lungs without hacking it all up again.

“What are you planning to do with Captain Faye?”

The voice, however distant, made the medic’s back stiffen, and when she glanced to her side, still wallowing in pain, she muttered out a string of profanities.

“You guys—” f*ck, her ribs kept throbbing like there was a knife being stabbed into them repeatedly. “—involved Krista?” Of all people, why did they have to get Krista roped into all this bullsh*t?

“Ymir insisted.”

“Ymir?” Faye coughed, groaning. “Where the—where is she?”

“Captain Faye, are you hurt?” The blonde rushed forward, helping her captain stand, while Bertholdt kept his hands on the ropes he used to tie Faye’s wrists. “Where are your injuries? I don’t see any— You’re bleeding!”

“Krista—”

“Historia.” She corrected, waving off Faye’s confusion while she worked on the top button of Faye’s trousers. “Just let me take a look, maybe there’s something I can—”

“Stop it,” The captain growled, taking a step backward but closer to Bertholdt. “I’ll—sh*t—I’ll be fine. Worry about yourself, and—” Her eyes flitted to the side, where the smaller titan watched the scene with its undivided attention. “—Ymir.”

“Captain, we haven’t seen you since yesterday—”

“Well, you’re seeing me now,” Faye wheezed, the base of her skull beginning to throb like it always did when she was starting to get a headache. “Is anyone going to—” she bit back a groan again, instead taking a sharp inhale of air. “Catch me up on what the hell is going on?”

“We don’t have the time to fill you in,” Bertholdt snapped, yanking on Faye’s wrists to send her tumbling backward into the crook of Reiner’s neck. Her lungs felt like they were going to shrivel up because of the lack of oxygen, and she could feel her heart starting to pick up its pace. “Just sit back and let Reiner handle this.”

“Did Zeke put you up to this?” It was all Faye could ask to keep her sanity in check. Her patience was slipping like a bar of soap through her fingers, and the longer she was subjected to being ridiculed by the tall cadet, the more she wanted to throw herself off of Reiner’s shoulder. “I can help you if you just—sh*t—if you just let me.”

“Help us?” Bertholdt was starting to sweat, and he couldn’t help the incredulous pitch in his voice. “You broke your ribs, and I can’t even tell where all this blood is coming from. Face it, Captain Jaeger, you’re no good to anyone in your condition.”

For a second, the wind passed straight through Faye’s skin, seeping into her bones while her fingertips twitched. He wasn’t wrong, per se, but he wasn’t exactly right, either.

“What happens when I recover?” She made sure to say it slowly, keeping her chest from heaving to relieve some of the pressure on her ribs. “Are you really sure you want to bring me back to Marley? Where they have advanced weaponry and technology? I’m a soldier, Bertie. I survived by learning how to adapt, and no one in Marley is going to be able to save themselves if I go on a rampage.”

A scream cut the conversation short, and Faye watched in mild horror as a soldier managed to land a hook into the hardened skin of the Armoured titan, swinging themselves up, only for their line to be jerked away, sending the soldier plummeting to the ground.

Then came another line, too fast for the naked eye to follow. Faster than the captain could blink, did Ymir give a pained roar as steaming blood spurted from her eyes. Mikasa zipped through the air, blades poised for action as more lines came down, and Bertholdt wrenched Faye back with him, calling out to Reiner for help.

Just as Mikasa brought her blades down, Reiner’s hands came up, caging Bertholdt, Eren, and Faye in while the young soldier’s metal rebounded off the hardened skin.

Bertholdt was breathing hard, his palms were clammy against Faye’s skin, and he paid no mind to the way his captain was coughing, struggling to inflate her lungs with air before expelling it. He was too focused on the way Mikasa glared through the cracks, a wild and infuriated glint in her eyes while she growled.

“Toss me around like that again, and I’ll—” She heaved. Her ribs felt like they were caving in against her innards, squeezing the air out of her chest. “—I’ll boil your teeth.”

A muffled gasp echoed within the prison of hardened skin, and within the instant, Bertholdt was shoved forward while grunts and cries vibrated through Eren’s throat. His feet came up against the wall of titan skin, pushing against it with all his might as he struggled to free himself.

When had Faye's little brother gotten there? What else had she managed to let slip by her attention? What the hell was going on?!

“Quit struggling, both of you!” Bertholdt hissed, pushing back against Eren. “It’s not going to help.”

“Like hell it isn’t,” Faye braced herself before she drove the back of her skull into the lanky soldier’s chin, feeling the familiar crack of his bones.

“I said stop—” Bertholdt released Faye’s wrists, but his hand found the side of her head, clutching onto her hair near the base of her scalp. “—struggling.” His hand forced her head to collide with the hardened skin, albeit a little more aggressively than needed. He felt her slump, listening to her wheezy breaths fill the air, while he attempted to keep her upright while fending Eren off.

She was slipping in and out of consciousness, catching little divots of conversation here and there. None of it made any sense to Faye, and she couldn’t hear half of what they were saying, thanks to the deafening ringing inside her ears. Her body felt like it was slowly shutting down, getting heavier by the second, and she strained herself trying to lift her head.

This was bad. If she couldn’t stay aware of the events unfolding around her, the chances of escaping would plummet.

“Bertholdt,” Faye slurred again, cutting into whoever the hell was speaking. “I know you’re not—not the enemy,” Her lungs felt like they were seizing, and her head pounded like a hammer to a nail. “You’re just a kid; let me help you.”

“You can’t even help yourself—”

“Bertholdt!”

It was a high-pitched voice that made the hair on Faye’s arms stand. Why the hell was Armin here? Had the entire regiment suddenly shown up to retrieve Eren or something? Just how much had Faye missed out on during the two days she was absent?

“So you’re okay with this?” The boy questioned, eyes darting toward Faye. She looked like she had seen better days, to put it lightly. “Leaving your friend behind to face the music? I guess Annie was weighing you down.” Armin could see the cogs turning in Bertholdt’s head as he spoke. “Do you know where she is right now? Way up North, in the Utopia District. Being tortured.”

Faye’s ears rung at the name. Annie? That was who Armin believed to be the Female Titan. It made sense that Reiner and Bertholdt would know her; they were all supposedly Warrior candidates who had inherited the titans. At least now she knew who all of them were.

“The silent treatment only goes so far,” Armin continued. “The body may heal, but her screams are an object lesson on the limits of endurance.” Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see the disgusted frown that Faye wore, but it was a small price to pay for her and Eren’s freedom. “Oh, don’t worry, they’re taking special care she doesn’t die or get a moment’s rest. So little time… Mustn’t waste a prize specimen like Annie. She’s too precious.”

“Shut your mouth, hellspawn,” Bertholdt cried, tucking Faye under his arm while his free hand clutched onto his blade while he threw a few lines out. “I’ll kill you!”

Faye’s head was spinning, the world tilting on its axis while her ribs jostled around again. The least Bertholdt could do was handle her with a little more care; it wasn’t like she was invincible or had titan healing abilities. She felt him take a step forward, preparing to jump from Reiner’s hand with her in tow.

The sound of a blade slicing through the air faster than the naked eye could follow reverberated inside her head. She felt Bertholdt’s hold on her slip while blood flew through the air. A growl hummed deep, and as she fell, she found herself engulfed in the familiar scent of expensive cologne.

Her eyes darted up just in time to witness the soul-clenching glare Erwin shot Bertholdt, his arm holding tightly to her waist as they fell. Never in all the months that Faye had known Erwin had she ever seen him so… furious. It was raw, and even in her preoccupied state, she could feel the tendrils of hatred seeping from Erwin’s body.

Yet, despite the murderous glint in her commander’s eyes, it had also been the first time that Faye had felt so completely and utterly relieved. Her eyes burned, blurring her vision, and her throat constricted tightly.

“Erwin?” It came out in a cough, wrists still bound together while she struggled to get a full breath of air.

“I’ve got you,” He murmured, the air shifting as he shot another line towards a shorter titan, maneuvering towards the ground. He glanced back, silently nodding at Mikasa, who had caught Eren. His focus was directed to sticking his landing without ending up in a heap on the ground, and when his feet met the ground near his horse, he wasted no time in slicing through the fabric holding Faye’s hands together. “I want a report on your injuries.”

“You’re missing an arm,” Faye muttered out through clenched teeth, biting back the groan when Erwin helped her onto his horse. “Let me—sh*t—let me help you.”

“Faye, I asked for a status report on your injuries,” His tone dropped a few octaves, and he heaved himself up behind her. “Don’t make me ask again.” Judging by the bags under his eyes and tense shoulders, his composure was fraying just as quick as Faye’s was.

“Cracked ribs, stab wounds, and head trauma,” She bitterly glowered. She didn’t bother getting into the more intimate injuries, she didn’t have the time, and it was exhausting to just think about. Not to mention humiliating.

Erwin’s brows shot up to his hairline, blatant surprise filtering onto his face. Cracked ribs and stab wounds? How the hell had she managed those? And how did she end up outside of Wall Rose?

“All soldiers, retreat!” His voice bellowed through the field, turning his horse away from the carnage. He could ask the hard-hitting questions later, but for now, he needed to know the basics. “Are you alright?”

“Everything hurts.”

“Blunt as ever, I see,” Erwin’s horse galloped forward, leading the rest of his soldiers away from the Armored Titan. “I’ll have the hospital look you over when we return to the walls.” Despite her typical attitude, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something had gone drastically wrong within the time that she had disappeared. She was acting like she was okay, but what about underneath the front she put up? He doubted she was in as good of mental space as she pretended to be. He expected Faye to reject his order, to claim that the doctors within the walls were all a bunch of morons, but when she did no such thing, his heart thundered inside his chest. That wasn't like Faye at all...

A shadow blocked the sun, leaving Faye to glance up. Her heart plummeted into the deepest pits of her stomach as a titan flew overhead, grinning down at her from above. She felt Erwin jerk the reins back, redirecting the horse to the side to avoid a collision.

“It’s like Armageddon out here,” Faye’s eyes kept darting around, watching as more titans flew through the air, crashing into soldiers. It was a miracle Erwin had dodged the first one, but now they were in the thick of it all, surrounded on all fronts.

Another titan came tumbling through the sky, landing too close for comfort. If the horse didn’t pick up speed, the titan was going to get up and catch up to them in no time.

“I think— I think that’s Ymir,” Faye panted, holding a shaky finger up to point at a gruesome-looking titan. It tilted its head and changed direction, heading straight for the commander and captain, but its eyes were locked onto something else.

The titan behind them.

Ymir pounced forward, but she leaped too low, feet dragging along the ground.

Faye’s hands worked instinctually, turning despite the incessant burning in her chest while she wrapped her arms around Erwin’s torso and threw them off the horse just in time to avoid getting clipped by Ymir. She felt her legs go airborne, tangled with Erwin’s as he maneuvered them midair so he would take the brunt of the fall.

The wind got knocked out of Faye again as she landed on top of her commander, listening to the soldiers around her wail. She couldn’t make out any of the words, and vaguely she could feel Erwin pulling her up, but it was all distant, and her movements felt distorted.

The dam inside Faye broke, and the floodgates burst open. All the emotions she had been trying to conceal desperately were hitting her full force, materializing in the form of hot tears welling in her eyes. Her throat seemed to close in on itself, and for a long heartbeat, she struggled to formulate a coherent thought. Her ribs and pelvis sweltered unapologetically, consuming her from the inside out.

“Erwin,” She felt a sob tugging at her voice. I’m having a hell of a day, and I could really use a hug right now.” She glanced backward, and the first tear ran down her cheek. In the distance, she could see her mother’s titan, blood dripping down her chin and chest, while Eren and Mikasa stood nearby.

Eren was the last person aside from her that Grisha had left in this world, and Dina’s last words had been a vow to find her husband regardless of what form she took on.

Of course, irony would have the last laugh.

The Commander didn’t say anything, merely clenched his jaw as he gently tugged Faye closer to him and rested his chin on top of her head while his arm circled her waist. His men were all screaming around him, wailing and crying the names of their loved ones, for someone to save them, for help.

For a fleeting heartbeat, he wondered if he would have screamed out for Faye.

And whether or not it would be his name she called for...

Despite the chaos surrounding him, he found solace and respite just holding Faye. She was shaking, and her skin was cold to the touch, but she was alive. Against all the odds he had calculated inside his head, Faye Jaeger was still alive.

He had only meant for it to be a few seconds, but he had trouble pulling away, especially when her hands clutched onto his jacket lapels and leaned her forehead against his chest. His heart was starting to crumble against the weight of her head, and as any noble-hearted man would feel, he just couldn’t bring himself to let go.

“If I stayed, we wouldn’t be in this mess,” Faye’s eyes squeezed shut, lips pressing into a grimace. “I shouldn’t have left Marley; I shouldn’t have let Dad turn Eren into a titan, I shouldn’t have—” Her voice caught in her throat, knuckles going white at how tight she held her commander’s jacket. “I shouldn’t have let any of this happen. It’s all my fault, Erwin. How many people am I going to murder before the guilt kills me? Levi told me he would help bear it — but — but he’s not here. I’m all alone, and nobody knows who I am .”

Her breath came out in quick puffs, nose sniffling between sentences and gasps.

“It must have been quite a frightening day and a half for you if you’re breaking down like this,” Erwin softly acknowledged, arm tightening just slightly around her waist. “When we get back to the walls, you should rest. We can discuss the events of the last two days once a doctor has checked you and your life isn’t in peril.” He could feel his shirt dampening, but that was the least of his concerns. “You and Eren are our priority, and I could never forgive myself if the two of you died before you seized Humanity’s freedom.”

“Erwin, you said your version of freedom was finding out the secrets behind the titans,” She sucked in a shallow breath, tilting her head up to look her commander in the eyes. This was the moment of truth, the singular instant he had been waiting for since they had met. “They’re—”

A shrill, piercing scream tore through the air, static rippling through Faye’s veins as she snapped her head back to find the source of the wail. Her words had been momentarily forgotten at the sound of the cry, and in horror, she realized that Dina’s hand was stretched out, intending to snag Eren from the ground.

The titans around the rest of the Scouts all froze, jaws slackening as they all stared blankly at Eren and Dina. Their eyes were vacant, the lights were on inside their heads, but no one was home.

The hair on Faye’s neck stood on edge as the titans seemed to leap forward in perfect synchronization, all heading towards the same source: Eren.

Faye’s legs moved on instinct, lungs caving in and rattling with every labored breath she took. Panic was searing into the flesh, and her stab wounds stretched as she took a futile step towards her brother.

“Oh my god,” She breathed, eyes widening at the sheer amount of titans all leaping towards Eren.

Erwin’s hand found Faye’s wrist, halting her movement. He watched as she turned her head, the lines beneath her eyes dark and sunken, while her face had gone unnaturally pale. He didn’t even have the time to speak before she started on him.

“Let me go, that’s my brother these titans are all hauling ass toward right now,” Her voice came out hoarsely, strained against her throat and chest. “That’s my baby brother. He’s out there, and he’s going to get eaten if I don’t do something—” Her knees buckled when she jostled herself a little too much, and her ribs blazed to life again.

“Faye,” The Commander’s eyes sharpened on the figures in the distance. “They’re not headed for Eren. They’re headed for the titan.”

The captain’s spine stiffened, mouth going dry.

Dina Fritz was staring a hole through Faye’s being. Its eyes were glued to its daughter’s, having picked her out in the distance. Even as hordes of titans barrelled forward, it grinned; lips curled, and canines barred. It didn’t flinch, not even when the first titan rammed into its leg and took a chunk from its calve.

“Mommy?”

It sounded disembodied and distant, leaving Faye to wonder if the word had even ghosted over her lips or not.

Faye watched with wide eyes, fingertips twitching as the gun around her shoulders weighed heavily around her shoulders. The rifle was useless against that many titans, and it wasn’t like her ribs were in any condition to withstand the kickback from the shot.

For the second time in Faye’s life, she was useless in preventing horror from befalling her mother. Subjected to what felt like an eternity of watching her mother be cannibalized by other titans, torn to shreds, and eaten alive.

Then came the second scream, and another round of static shot through Faye as it did with all the other titans. They stopped their assault on Dina but focused on the Armored Titan and Bertholdt.

*

Alexander’s leg bounced uncontrollably, his hands playing with Beef’s tail while he anxiously waited inside the hospital with Levi. The walls were uncomfortably blank, and the nurses often shot him dirty looks for bringing an animal into their supposedly clean environment — though he could hardly classify it as being sterile. There were too many dust particles flying around, and the hospital reeked of third-rate isopropyl alcohol.

“She’s still in there?”

The cat jumped when Alexander’s arms flailed for a second, his spine stiffening beneath the heavy weight of his captain. He looked tired. More so than usual, and Alexander couldn’t quite tell if he was relieved Faye and Erwin made it back alive or horrified that they looked so battered.

Al’ nodded, sighing while he relaxed in his chair again. “How’s Commander Smith doing?”

“Stable.”

Levi’s brief response garnered a small frown from the boy. It wasn’t like Alexander saw Levi as a friend or anything, but the least he could have done was offer some sympathy or show a little compassion.

Slowly, the captain lowered himself into the seat next to Alexander and leaned back. It felt he was barely holding onto his sanity, like a thread over a lit candle. It had already been over three hours that those doctors had been operating on Faye, and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could wait to find out if she survived or not.

“How’s your ankle?” Alexander ventured, trying to fill the silence with meaningless small talk. Maybe it would make the time pass by faster.

“Fine.”

“You know Faye is going to be pissed if she wakes up and finds out that you haven’t been resting your leg like you were supposed to,” The boy was quick to point out. “I’m not sure who she’ll be more upset with: You for not taking her orders seriously, or me for not making you take it easy.”

“Like you could —”

The sound of the door opening cut Levi off mid-sentence while Alexander shot out of his chair fast than he could blink, all but throwing the cat off his lap. The doctor stepped into the hallway flanked by two nurses, who —like the doctor— were all covered in blood.

“How is she? Is she okay? Can we go in to see her? Is she going to make it? What’s wrong with her? Is she going to wake up any time soon—”

“She’s in stable condition,” The doctor sighed, cutting into the boy’s rapid-fire questions. “You can go in, but visiting hours are over in thirty minutes.” He watched his nurses continue forward, each bearing a heavy frown as they returned to their stations.

Al’ wasted no time in thanking the doctor before he scurried into the room, letting the door shut behind him without glancing back at Captain Levi.

“I want a list of injuries and how to ensure they heal properly once Faye has been discharged,” The words came out in an irritated huff while Levi stared down the doctor expectantly. “I also want to hear what your best-educated guess is as to what happened to her.”

“I’m not at liberty—”

“Start talking, or you’ll have the Military Police on your ass,” Levi’s voice dropped into a low growl while he stood to his full height and glared up at the doctor. He wasn’t in the mood to screw around, and the sooner he made sense of Faye’s injuries and figured out what to do about them, the sooner he could let his shoulders relax.

A tense heartbeat passed, the two locked in a staring contest to see which would crack under pressure first. Levi was steadfast in wielding his chin high and utilizing his glare to the best of his abilities, slicing through the doctor’s sh*tty excuse for a resolve.

“Ms. Jaeger cracked her ribs,” The doctor exhaled, letting his words hang in the air. “She’s lost a lot of blood, and it’s unclear how long it’ll take before she wakes up. It could be a day, or it could be a week.” He glanced behind Humanity’s Strongest at the nurses behind the counter, who busied themselves with whispering to one another. “The stab wounds — they —” He hesitated, wondering whether or not this was information he should divulging to someone who wasn’t even in a relationship with Faye as far as he knew.

“Spit it out,” Levi’s eyes narrowed, frowning at the bewildered tilt on the doctor’s lips. “I’ve taken sh*ts that have come out faster than this.”

“They damaged her womb,” he blurted, screwing his eyes shut. “It’s irreparable. Ms. Jaeger will live to be childless, and as such, I wouldn’t expect her to ever marry a suitable man.” The words nearly stung as he forced them out, shame and despair coursing through his veins for the pitiful woman who laid in the room behind him. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Humanity’s Strongest, fearful that the captain would appear apathetic towards his patient. “In addition to that, I concluded she was sexually abused, and —”

“And?” Levi’s brows shot up, masking the horrified lilt in his voice by clearing his throat. “There’s more?”

“Well,” The doctor shifted from foot to foot. “You can see for yourself. The bruises are self-explanatory.” When the doctor finally lowered his eyes, he felt his jaw slacken.

Humanity’s Strongest looked like he was nearly shaking with unadulterated fury.

He could practically feel the waves of rage emanating from the captain’s body, darkening the atmosphere around him. He was fighting to keep his fists from shaking, but his lips had been pulled thin, and if the dangerous glint in his eyes were anything to judge by, Levi was boiling just beneath his skin.

“I—er— I’m getting back to work,” The doctor stammered, taking a rushed step to the side and out of Levi’s direct line of vision. “Have a good day, captain.”

Levi swore under his breath, muttering about the staff's incompetence at the hospital while he reined in his emotions. If Faye were in as bad of condition as the doctor has stated, then her recovery would need to be taken seriously, and it was likely that she would need to stay on bed rest for at least the next three weeks.

Alexander startled from his spot in the chair next to the bed, staring up at his captain with tear-stained eyes. He was holding Faye’s hand to his forehead, murmuring into the otherwise silent room. He caught captain Levi’s eye for a heartbeat before he looked away, hiding his blurry eyes from sight.

“Titans didn’t make those bruises around her neck, did they?” Al’ softly sniffled, hearing the creak of the wood as his captain drew closer. “She could have died out there...”

“Maybe she did.”

It was a small admittance, but Levi’s mind strayed to the night he watched Faye revive Alexander’s mother and the horrifying crack that seemed to echo within his mind. What did she call it during her first aid course? CPR? If that were the case, she was intentionally kidnapped, and whoever was behind it wanted her alive. Probably the same bastard who used her like a common whor*.

“sh*t.” Levi breathed, zeroing in on Faye’s face for the first time in two days. She looked like she crawled out of Hell. The doctor hadn’t been lying when he said the bruises were self-explanatory; he could make out exactly where someone’s fingers wrapped around her windpipe and squeezed. He didn’t dare graze the blackened skin, but he let his fingertips ghost over the marks subconsciously.

“I asked Eren, and he said he doesn’t even remember how Reiner and Bertholdt got her,” Alexander’s tone quivered, and he struggled to hold back his tears. “She was just kind of there when he woke up, but— but—”

“Ral,” Levi’s gaze didn’t waver from Faye, too anxious to take his eyes off her in fear that she would disappear again. “Stop whining and get your sh*t together. Now isn’t the time to crumble like a pillar of salt.”

“Captain… I—she’s all I have left, sir.” Alexander seemed to recede into himself, averting his eyes while his shoulders slumped. “It’s hard not to fall apart when the only thing keeping me together is lying in a hospital bed, comatose.”

The two sat in silence for a few heartbeats, neither daring to say a word to the other and instead let the words marinate inside their heads.

Chapter 24: Kenny!

Chapter Text

840 - Trost District

A lantern flickered inside The Tea House, setting a soft glow to dance against Faye’s cheeks while she worked on the bookkeeping. A frown tilted her lips down, and her brows furrowed as she counted on her fingers, carefully rechecking her calculations.

“Awfully late to be working.”

The hair on Faye’s arms stood as she snapped her head up. There, standing in her doorway, was a relatively young-looking man wearing an expensive-looking hat. He held a cigarette between his teeth, grinning down at the teenager behind the counter.

“The Tea House is closed right now,” She was careful to shift away from the man, bringing her hand to sit on her lap — consequently closer to the gun she kept hidden near her cash register. “We open at eight-thirty sharp tomorrow.”

She didn’t tense when he took another step into her shop, but she flexed her fingertips, readying herself for the worst.

“I’ve heard some interesting rumors on the street,” He let out a heavy breath, continuing to leisurely stroll forward. His shoulders were pulled back; chin raised high. His shoes tapped against the wooden flooring, trench coat swaying behind him. “Apparently, you’re running a pretty smooth operation here.”

“It’s only been a few months since I opened, but I’m very optimistic about the success rate of my tea shop,” Faye kept her voice flat, staring the man down. She knew he wasn’t talking about her tea shop, but she wasn’t about to outwardly admit that she was dealing drugs on the side. The fewer clients she had, the easier it would be to figure out who ratted on her if the police ever came knocking on her door. “As I said earlier, if you want to come back in the morning, I’d be more than happy to assist you.”

“Gutsy little runt, aren’t ya?” He questioned, raising a brow as he slid into the seat across from Faye at the counter. “Lying to a famous serial killer like it’s a normal Tuesday night.”

“I could say the same for you.” Faye countered, unmoving. She watched him clasp his hands, setting them on the counter while he observed her. “Who’s to say I haven’t murdered just as many people as you have?”

“You don’t strike me as the type to enjoy that kind of life,” His canines peeked out from his lips as they stretched from ear to ear, eyes glinting dangerously in the flickering lantern light. “A nice little girl like you?” He tilted his head, hat casting a dark shadow over his brows. “No. You hate violence. Probably still have nightmares about whoever the poor sons of bitches were.”

“I’m not opposed to violence when the situation calls for it,” She moved slowly — deliberately — noting the way the man watched her owlishly, but did nothing to stop her, not even when Faye brought the shotgun into his line of sight, flicking the safety off before she took aim and laid the barrel over his forehead. “I’ll make a deal with you; you don’t kill me, and I won’t haunt your ass.”

For a long heartbeat, the two stared each other down. Neither moved, both focusing on the gunmetal against their skin. The man in front of Faye was an unknown, and whoever he was, he was certainly unhinged. She could tell by the way he curled his lips in a smile. Something about his casual attitude made sirens blare inside her head, begging her just to pull the trigger and be done with it, but the chasm in her soul whispered into the depths, quietly anticipating why he had sought her out.

“Faye Jaeger,” She breathed, removing the gun from his forehead and placing it back behind the counter. She might have only been a teenager, but she wasn’t dumb enough to leave the shotgun sitting on the counter where the supposed serial killer could just as easily snatch it away.

“Kenny. Kenny the Ripper.”

For a moment, the floor swayed beneath Faye’s feet, and she struggled to remember how to breathe. He was notorious, and by the predatory grin he wore, he knew it too. What the hell had she gotten herself into this time?

“Alright, Mr. Ripper,” her fingers twitched, though she kept them from reaching for her gun again. “I doubt you’re here for some late-night tea, so let’s cut to the chase.”

“Mr. Ripper?” Kenny barked out a laugh, startling the teenager in front of him. “Cute. That ain’t one I’ve heard before. Color me impressed, kid.” He set his hat down gently, leaning forward in his seat. “Tell me about your little side hustle.”

“Not much to tell,” She did her best to come off nonchalant, but it came out strained instead. “I’ve got a wide array of drugs; you pay, I supply.”

“I pay, and you supply, eh?” He amusedly repeated. “Big words for a runt like you.”

“I’m not a runt; I’m fifteen,” Faye couldn’t help the subtle pout that overtook her lips, angling her chin down a notch. “If you want the goods, you better start treating me with respect. You can start by grabbing the broom over there and sweeping up all the dirt you just tracked into my shop, you dirty old man.”

Kenny blinked, lips tilting into a frown as Faye’s words echoed inside his head. She could practically see the gears spinning as he tried to process what she had just said. The illicit doctor kept her hand ready to pull her rifle up, just in case he took offense, and she waited with bated breath.

Again, Kenny howled with laughter, slapping his knee and clutching his stomach. His eyes danced with unadulterated mirth, and he had trouble composing himself, more so after noticing how rigid Faye had gone. It was hard to believe he was really Kenny the Ripper — the notorious serial killer known for slitting the throats of his victims.

“Kid,” He wiped a tear from his eye, struggling to contain himself. “You’re going to send yourself into an early grave if you keep tryin’ to act all tough like that.”

“I—It’s not an act,” To Faye’s horror, she felt her cheeks start to burn, and it wasn’t like she could just make a run for it to the kitchens without raising suspicion. “I meant it. You made a big mess of my floors, and I just cleaned.” She insisted, clinging tightly to her dignity.

Kenny raised a brow, grinning. “You sound just like this other little sh*t-stain I know. Obsessed with cleaning and gets flustered real easy. Maybe I should introduce the two of you.”

“Alright, Mr. Ripper,” Faye huffed out an exasperated sigh. “Do you want the goods or not? Because if you’re just going to sit there, muck up my floors, and make me feel like sh*t, then you can kiss your stupid drugs goodbye.”

He leaned back on the stool, rolling his shoulders back. “What do you say I sweep this dump up, and we can discuss business with a nice, hot cup of tea?” He was careful in maintaining his casual demeanor, not willing to seem uptight and authoritative.

“I told you that I was closed for the night.” Faye deadpanned. “We can discuss business, but if you’re looking for tea, I meant it when I told you to come back in the morning.” She was steadfast in not making another pot for the serial killer. She had already cleaned up for the night, and she wasn’t keen on doing another round of dishes this late at night.

“You drive a hard bargain,” The serial killer sighed. “And here I was, excited to try the tea Shiganshina’s finest whor* had to serve—”

Faye’s rifle came up faster than Kenny could blink, aimed at the cavity in which his heart should have resided. Her lips were pulled into a thin line, unamused by the situation. It didn’t take a genius to gather that the illicit doctor had more experience shooting a gun than half the Military Police, and if Kenny had to wager, he would bet that she had better aim than most of them, too.

“Listen, Mr. Ripper,” Faye’s voice had dropped a few octaves, glaring down at the serial killer who sat across from her unapologetically. “I’ve had a long day, so either you cut to the chase and tell me what kind of drugs you’re looking for or get the hell out of my shop. I’m not looking to open old wounds, so I would appreciate it if you stuck to staying professional instead of prying into my personal life.”

“That’s the second time you’ve pointed your gun at me,” Kenny blew out a dry chuckle. “Most don’t even have time to take aim.”

“Stop wasting my time,” she growled, furrowing her brows. She didn’t let her finger unlatch from the trigger, hyper-aware of how foreign a person Kenny was. She couldn’t figure out if he was really as deadly as all the rumors or if he was just acting like a jackass for sh*ts and giggles. “Who snitched on me, and what the hell kind of drugs does a well-known serial killer need?”

“Awfully touchy about your past,” Despite the cool metal against his forehead, he didn’t lean away or shift uncomfortably; in fact, the only indication that he was taking Faye’s threat seriously was the downturn of his lips.

Time seemed to slow when Kenny finally flitted his eyes up to meet Faye’s. There was an unfamiliar glint in his eyes, and he seemed to peer into the depths of Faye’s soul, picking her apart faster than she could process. Heart-wrenching fear bubbled up in the pits of her stomach, and the longer Kenny looked, the more vulnerable and exposed Faye found herself involuntarily becoming.

“I… It’s not something I’m proud of.”

It was the first time she had ever admitted the truth out loud, but it felt nice to finally vocalize the words that had echoed within her throat for the last two years.

“Kid,” Kenny’s eyes softened — if only slightly — as he spoke. “You made it out of the sh*t-hole alive. That’s something to be proud of.”

“Mr. Ripper,” Faye started hesitantly, still at the ready to pull the trigger. “Can we start over?”

*

Kenny stalked through the door in his signature trench coat and wide-brimmed hat, stepping into Faye’s shop. Not much had changed, but it certainly looked a lot brighter in the late-morning sunlight. He could easily see the charm in sitting down and having a cup of tea at one of the tables while he whittled away his day.

“Excuse me, sir,” A tiny voice interrupted his wandering eyes, drawing him to squint down at a little ginger-haired pip-squeak. The boy was so skinny; he looked sickly. Eyes too big for his face, and the clothes he wore hung off his shoulders. “You’re not allowed to loiter. Faye says you have to buy something if you wanna stay.”

“Does she now?” Kenny mused. “You know where she is?”

Alexander glanced backward at the door leading into the kitchens, biting his lip. Kenny could practically see the hesitance written on the kid’s face, and as irritating as it was, he couldn’t blame the little sh*t for not trusting him.

“Menus are in the corner,” he sighed, warily looking up at Kenny. “I’ll go get her.”

For a second, the kid didn’t move, still watching the stranger in front of him. It didn’t take a genius to see the apprehension written across the kid’s face, even when he slowly moved and started towards the door in the back.

Kenny let out a small snort, shaking his head. The kid was cute, smart for not blindly trusting him like every other moron on the streets, but he was nothing in comparison to Levi. He would kill himself before he ever admitted it, but his nephew was the only thing he ever found himself remotely proud of.

“I thought we finished all of our business last night?” Faye slid into the seat opposite Kenny, sporting heavy bags under her eyes and a frown that never left her face. She wasn’t at all amused, and the entire exchange the night prior had left her with little sleep, too busy tossing and turning while she wondered what kind of torture Kenny the Ripper inflicted on his victims. “Is this going to be some kind of sick game we play where you show up during my work hours?”

“I was just hopin’ to work out a schedule with you,” Kenny browsed the menu, languidly leaning back in his chair while dutifully avoiding Faye’s gaze. “Any particular day of the month work best for you?”

“Whenever.”

Kenny peeked over the menu, furrowing his brow at the teenager. He wasn’t exactly sure whether he should be offended that Faye didn’t give two sh*ts about when he dropped in or glad that her calendar was so flexible for his murderous schedule.

“What’s got you so down in the dumps?”

“Has anyone ever told you that you talk a lot?” Faye grumbled, leaning her chin on her hand. “Because you do. Like, a lot. Too much, sometimes.”

“Just tryin’ to get to know my newest supplier,” Kenny pouted, expertly feigning indignancy. “Is that against the law?” He batted his eyelashes, doing his damndest to come off innocent despite his reputation for being a literal serial killer.

“Murder definitely is.”

“Black tea,” Kenny finally decided, eyes darting up to meet Faye’s. “I’ll have the black tea. Who do I need to flag down? Is it the little red-head that’s been glaring holes into me since I got here?”

“His name is Alexander, and I’d rather you keep away from him.” Faye’s tone was resolute, snapping to attention at the prospect of Kenny speaking to her employee more than what was necessary. “I’ll go get us a pot, and you can gather your thoughts about this supposed schedule you’re hoping to create.”

He watched her push up from her seat, eagerly disappearing behind the door in the back with the kid in tow. Teenagers… what a nightmare. He couldn’t imagine trying to deal with Levi’s sh*t, especially when the kid was already so finicky and particular about everything . Maybe it really was for the best that he left.

Still, an annoying nagging tugged at the back of Kenny’s mind. Faye looked and acted like any other teenager, but last night… the way she wielded that shotgun… there wasn’t any hesitation within her movements. Didn’t even flinch when her finger met the trigger. That sort of cutthroat personality didn’t just manifest within the average citizen. If she was that adept with a gun, why hadn’t Faye enrolled in the military?

And the bizarre bout of eye contact last night? He could practically see the fear festering inside of Faye when she met his gaze, like an animal that had been backed into a corner. Something was definitely wrong with Faye Jaeger, but it wasn’t any of Kenny’s business, and he wasn’t about to pry any more than necessary.

“Oi,” Kenny addressed, watching as Faye set two piping hot cups of tea down along with an entire pot. “Second Wednesday of the month.”

“That’s fine.”

He bit his tongue to keep his sourness from leeching onto his face. The teenager was acting like a depressed sociopath, and her tea shop was only big enough for one mentally deranged individual — a seat Kenny was currently occupying.

“Um,” Faye’s reluctant tone caught Kenny’s interest, and he watched as she nudged around her teacup. “How did you know about Shiganshina?”

“You think I wouldn’t do my research on you?” He raised a brow. “I read your entire file.” He leaned back in his seat, bringing the teacup to his lips while he reveled in the anxious atmosphere. “It’s interesting that your file was almost completely blank except for your birthday and your employment at the local whor*house.” He didn’t miss the subtle twitch in her fingers as she stayed quiet, nor did he forgo how concentrated and alert she went. “Somethin’ you wanna get off your chest?”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“You teenagers are always so dramatic.” Kenny hid his grin as he took another sip of his tea.

“If only that were the case,” Faye hummed, crossing her arms as she relaxed. “Most women my age are worried about their wedding, but I doubt I’ll ever secure a future with any sort of family. Not if they know about Shiganshina.”

“Do you really want to be obsessed with marriage?” He couldn’t hide the disgust in his voice, not to mention the slight curl his lips took in revulsion at the thought. “Locked down and expected to pop sh*t-stains out for the rest of your life? You never struck me as the Trophy-Wife type.”

The air left Kenny’s lungs at the sight of Faye’s strained smile, guts wrenching like he had a knife twisted in his innards. He hadn’t even thought his comment was half as insulting as usual, so what the hell was she getting her panties in a twist for? And that sh*tty excuse for a smile? Why did it even bother him that much?

“Well, Mr. Ripper,” Faye shoved away from the table, forcing a curve onto her lips. “If that’s all, I’ll see you next month with your supply.”

“I killed the pisshead who snitched on you,” The words came out in a swift breath, and to Kenny’s disembodied relief, it made Faye freeze, her neck craning to watch him warily. He could have sworn he saw guilt flash through her eyes, drowning her from the inside out.

“What do you want in return?” She tiredly questioned, leaning her weight on the chair she previously occupied. The bags under her eyes deepened, defining just how exhausted she really looked.

“Consider it a favor,” Kenny shrugged, exhaling as he finished the last of his tea. “Can’t have my supplier getting turned in this early into the game.”

“Is that what this is for you? A game?”

“Kills time,” He grinned, lifting his hat to his head again. “I only want two things, power and entertainment. Killing provides both.”

“They don’t haunt you?” Faye reluctantly questioned, as though fearing the answer Kenny was sure to give. She stood rigidly, looking down at the serial killer with an undecipherable expression.

“Faye,” Alexander hollered from the cash register, a woman staring down at the boy in blatant annoyance. “Can you come make sure I did the math, right?!”

“See you next month,” Faye sighed, giving a nod to Kenny before she started for the snot-nosed little kid.

Kenny watched the teenager’s back as she retreated, followed by the way her lips twitched up into a forced smile at her customer as she made small talk. How the woman snorted out an irritated complaint.

He didn’t understand Faye, not even a little bit. The runt was too sensitive, and her mood swings gave him a headache. Even so, there was something about her that he found himself getting attached to, similar to how he had gone soft when he came across Levi all those years ago.

Kenny left feeling more hollow than when he arrived.

843 (Three Years Later)

“I still don’t understand how you manage a tea shop, an illicit hospital, and a drug-dealing business at the same time,” Alexander groaned, leaning over the counter boredly. “Doesn’t that ever get to be too much? Running from the Military Police, keeping half your life a secret from the public, you’re like a spy.”

“It’s not as glamorous as you’re imagining, Al’,” Faye teased. “It’s a lot of late nights refilling prescriptions and manually making the pills and drugs.”

“Yeah, but then you get to deliver all that medicine, and you’re like everyone’s secret hero,” The boy grinned, separating the different coins to count them. “Look, someone could walk through that door right now, and within like… twenty seconds, you would know exactly how to treat them. If that doesn’t count as some kind of superhuman ability, I don’t know what does.”

“Imagine a human being able to turn into a titan at will,” She quipped, restocking the loose-leaf tea for the morning. “Wouldn’t that be spectacular?”

“That’s superhuman in the paranormal sense; you’re superhuman in the ordinary-miracles sort of way,” Alexander squinted at the money, carefully recounting them in a soft whisper while he momentarily halted the conversation. “Like… You could pass off as normal when people first glance at you, but the second someone decides to get to know you, they’ll never be able to look at the rest of humanity the same.”

“When did you gain the wisdom of an age-old sage at the ripe age of thirteen?” Faye’s brows quirked up in question, shooting a disbelieving glance at the boy.

“I’ll have you know that I just finished a two hundred page book in which —”

“Another romance novel?” Faye bit back a laugh. “No wonder you’ve been extra sentimental and full of sh*t lately.”

“I’m not full of sh*t, I’m just— I’m just trying to be mindful of everyone around me,” he scowled at the woman beside him, who was barely holding in her amusem*nt. “Besides, there’s nothing wrong with reading; at least I’m not down at the pubs gambling all my money away.”

“I never said there was anything wrong with reading, but half of those books you’ve got your nose buried in have no substance,” She retaliated. “They all have the same story, so I don’t understand why you’re so obsessed.”

“Well, I—”

The door slammed open, the rain pelting on the figures of three men who prowled in Faye’s doorway, each bearing a predatory grin as they eyed the illicit doctor.

“Isn’t it about your bedtime, kid?” One of them asked as he stepped forward, dragging his muddy boots along Faye’s previously spotless floors. “Your boss and I got some business to — er— attend to.”

“Hey, Faye,” Alexander mumbled, still eying the three criminals who dared to sully the hardwood he had just mopped. “You want me to take care of these chumps?”

“You’re just going to get hurt, Al’,” Faye didn’t bother herself with gleaning any more than a quick glance up at the men crowding her entrance, “These guys aren’t worth gambling your pride for.”

“But they’re—”

“They’re what?” The one on the side snapped, lips curling into a sneer at the ginger-haired boy.

“Do you boys mind taking a seat? I just need to pay my associate here, and then I can get you those orders of methamphetamine and hallucinogenics,” The illicit doctor didn’t waste any time in interjecting, too tired to put up with any sort of argument between Alexander and the thugs.

“Take your time, doll,” The leader of the group spoke, slinging his arms around his lackeys as he dragged them all to one of the tables in the shop. Their boots squelched along as they carried forward, footprints embedded in the mud their boots carried.

“Al’,” Faye led the boy into the kitchens, pushing open the door and gently closing it behind her. “This is non-negotiable. You aren’t getting acquainted with anyone from my side business, I mean it.” She sent him a resolute stare, clinging to her decision with a steadfast grip. “This isn’t the life I want you to lead, making dirty money and involving yourself with the worst humanity has to offer. Do you understand me?”

“Yeah, but how come you have to be the one to do all the dirty work?” Alexander’s words came out in a huff, leaving him to cross his arms and give his sternest frown to his employer. “It’s always you. I don’t even know when you started doing all of this, but don’t you think it’s about time you put it all to an end?”

“It’s not a viable option—”

“But why not?” Alexander pressed, brows furrowing as he tried to understand Faye’s reasoning. “Are you being threatened? Extortion? Just tell me, I’m thirteen, I can handle it.”

“We can talk about this later,” Faye quietly offered, “But right now, I need you to go home and forget you ever saw those three.”

“Faye, this isn’t fair!”

“I’m only going to say this once,” Again, her voice treaded the line between whispering and speaking, “I’m not the damsel in distress. I’m the one who distresses the people around me.” She stared Alexander down, doing her best to keep an authoritative air surrounding herself. The boy was too curious for his own good, and if he ever learned that he was part of the reason Faye was knee-deep in criminal affairs, the boy would never forgive himself. “You don’t need to worry about me; I’ll manage just fine on my own.”

“You never accept anyone’s help,” Alexander grumbled, swiping his pouch of money from Faye’s hands. “Fine. If you’re all roughed up in the morning, it’s your fault. I offered, and you declined.” He stomped off, still muttering out his frustrations while Faye watched, oblivious to how petulant he was acting.

It only took a second for Faye to compose herself, steeling her nerves while she masked herself in a polite smile, grabbing the packages from one of her cupboards. Within the instant, she pushed open the kitchen door and greeted the men all lounging around in her shop.

“We were just chit-chatting about you,” The ringleader drawled, taking his feet off Faye’s table. He jutted his chin out to the empty seat across from him, tucked away between his two lackeys. “Please, sit down. We have a lot to discuss.”

Faye’s heart sunk at his words, and she swallowed thickly. “I think I’d like to stay standing if that’s alright with you.” It was a poor attempt to keep her distance, something the thugs had started taking notice of.

“You’ll hurt my feelings,” He brought a hand to his chest, lips puckering into a mocking pout. “Have we ever done anything to lose your trust?”

Faye hesitantly glanced back to the counter, where her shotgun was sitting tucked away, much too far away for her to feel comforted. These men were nearly twice her size, and if they swamped her, there was no way she would make it out unscathed.

“I’m not in the habit of handing out my trust blindly,” Faye carefully articulated. “But feel free to make yourselves at home.”

“I guess we’ll just stand with you, then,” The leader chuckled, grunting as he stood to his full height while his lackeys followed suit. “Now, onto business, shall we?” He took a lazy step forward, towering over Faye, who stood rigidly. “I take it you have the goods?”

“All here,” Faye held up the paper bag, take a subtle step backward. The men were all swarming around her, and unease festered in the pits of her stomach. “Do you have the money?”

“About that,” The leader took a daunting step toward Faye, easily closing most of the distance between them. “I think your prices are a little too high for our liking.”

“If that’s the case, you can find business elsewhere,” She scoffed, fingers twitching as she glanced back at the counter. “I’m not changing my prices just because a couple of low-lives like you can’t afford it. I told you from the very start; you want it, you pay accordingly for it.”

“I’m sure we can agree on a different method of payment,” As if the three of them were synchronized, they all took a calculated step toward the illicit doctor, circling around her like rabid wolves.

“I already said—”

“Don’t be a bitch,” The leader hissed, hand darting out to hold Faye’s chin in a vice-like grip. “Nobody likes a f*cking tease, you little slu*t.”

“Yeah?” Faye challenged, bracing herself. “Well, nobody likes an asshole.”

She moved swiftly, fingers jamming straight into the spot where his shoulder met his chest on both arms, before she ducked, just barely avoiding a swing from one of the other thugs.

Confusion blanched over the leader’s face as he tried to move his hands, and he shouted something indiscernible to his associates, though it vaguely resembled the words, “That bitch!” but the blood was rushing through Faye’s ears a little too loudly for her to be certain.

Thus began the brawl.

*

Kenny’s mood was foul, to begin with. He was soaked to the bone because of the sh*tty weather, and his latest kill hadn’t satisfied him the way he had hoped it would. The gaping hole where his soul should have been only blackened, and he retreated from the scene covered in more blood than necessary.

His apathy to cleaning up was going to get him caught one of these days…

Not to mention that he was stuck in Trost for the night, and it wasn’t like he could show up to an inn while he was still slick with warm blood. Wouldn’t that be a sight for the poor son of a bitch taking the night shift?

He tilted his head, faltering in his steps for a moment.

The sh*tty sign reading ‘The Tea House’ loomed overhead, glinting in the moonlight. The lantern inside was still on, and he wouldn’t be at all surprised if Faye were sitting at that damned counter, pouring over her logbook for all the sh*tty money her tea raked in.

He hovered his hand over the doorknob, debating his options. Worst case scenario, Faye kicked him out and refused him for the night. It was worth a try.

So he pushed the door open, stepping past the threshold of the door.

“Who the f*ck are you?” Someone shouted over all the ruckus inside. “Who the f*ck is this guy?!”

“f*ck! The bitch broke my nose!”

Kenny blinked, jaw slackening at the sight of Faye getting forcibly pushed to her knees while one of the men locked eyes with him, glaring menacingly. Whatever he had just stepped into was obviously a private affair between Faye and whoever these punks were, and he had half a mind to turn around and exit without getting involved.

Of course, Kenny the Ripper would never willingly turn away from a fight.

One of the men’s fingers threaded into Faye’s hair, clutching tightly near the base of her skull as he wrenched her head back, bringing his pocket knife up to her throat. The other one stalked away, likely to deal with Kenny. The one holding her was breathing heavily, and he looked worse for wear. No one ever suspected that the short tea shop owner could hold her own against grown men, she looked unassuming enough, and her height certainly didn’t help her case; yet, here she was, less battered than all three of the men she had just spent the last two minutes defending herself against.

“You little bitch,” He snarled. “You never told us you were expecting company.”

“You never asked,” Faye spat, teeth gnashing together to stop the grunt of pain when he yanked on her hair.

“I’m gonna shove all these f*cking drugs down your throat and—”

“Paul! Help us, dammit!

It only took a split second. Paul’s attention had been diverted, and his grip on Faye’s hair had gone momentarily slack, but it was all the time Faye needed to jerk herself backward, maneuvering halfway through the air to narrowly dodge the large man who came tumbling down after her.

Her muscles thrummed with energy, burning as she brought her elbow down straight into his nose, which cracked under the pressure, the cartilage giving way. He sputtered out a sh*tty insult, but Faye had already moved on, choosing to survey the scene in front of her.

Kenny was holding his own against the two thugs, grinning maniacally as the knife in his hand glinted in the lantern light, blood splattering against the floor and walls as she swung his arm, the blade slicing one of the hoodlum's necks.

It was the first time Faye had ever witnessed Kenny’s psychopathic tendencies in full swing. He looked almost… giddy at the prospect of blood being shed by his hand, canines peeking out from his wide smile. He hadn’t even looked to her once since he joined the fight, too invested in his newfound prey.

Three whole years… Faye had known Kenny for three whole years, and in all of his monthly visits, she had never seen him so drunk on life.

It all happened in a blur, one second, Faye was sitting there, staring at her savior, and the next, she was holding the shotgun she kept under her counter, taking in a deep breath as she took aim and squeezed the trigger.

The silence was so deafening, her ears rung in an attempt to fill the empty air. The last man was lying on the ground with a bullet hole clear through his skull.

“Was that a fluke?”

“No.” Faye’s voice felt disembodied, sounding far away and distant. How long had it been since she had gunned down a man? It felt like a lifetime, but her muscles had moved on pure instinct, following the stream of actions that were embedded onto the frame of who Faye was at her core. Would she always act on the muscle memory wielded by a murderer?

“One hell of a shot,” Kenny grunted, kneeling down and investigating the bullet hole. “Dead center, too. Where’d you learn to shoot like that?” The question had been burning a hole in his throat ever since he had first realized Faye knew her way around a shotgun, and now that he finally asked, he found himself nearly impatient for an answer.

“Hell on Earth.”

The serial killer barked out a laugh, “Stop bein’ so dramatic. Come on, kid, what’s the truth? Your old man take you hunting when you were a kid of somethin’?”

“No.” Carefully, Faye tucked the shotgun under the counter, fingers twitching at the absence of steady weight in her hands. “I should probably clean all of this up.” She stared at the three bodies, contemplating how she could hide them. It wasn’t exactly a situation she had ever dealt with before, and to say she was a little panicked would be an understatement.

“Oi,” Kenny shoved his hands in his pockets, tilting his head down in an attempt to shield his concern. “If you take care of all the blood, I’ll dump the bodies.”

“You’ll… dump the bodies?” The words sounded incredulous — especially when Faye was the one saying it out loud.

“What kind of a serial killer would I be if I couldn’t get rid of a few bodies?” He grinned. “You look like you need to take a sh*t. Go sit down; I’ll be back in a half-hour.”

She watched him haul all three corpses out, not another word spoken between the pair. The Tea House had been privy to many a quiet night, but none filled with such loud thoughts swirling the empty air. Of all people, why had Kenny the Ripper shown up? He wasn’t due for another two weeks… and why was he acting so calm about the whole situation?

Faye got to work on cleaning, mopping, and scrubbing her floors. If the Military Police came knocking, she could just as easily deny seeing anyone or being a part of their murder investigation. She took a deep breath, steadying her heart rate. Kenny was right, he had been in this lifestyle for a lot longer than her, so if anyone knew how to shift the blame for a murder, it would be him. As long as Faye kept her head down, she would make it out of this just fine… maybe…

Time ticked by at an agonizingly slow pace, marching on dolefully. The seconds blurred into minutes as the illicit doctor cleaned. Movement took over, allowing Faye’s mind to wander as it pleased while she meticulously scrubbed away the blood. What was the saying? Wash, rinse, repeat.

The bell over the door rang, leaving Faye to glance up at Kenny. Now that she wasn’t panicking, she could actually register that not only was Kenny drenched from the rain, but blood seeped through what was once his white shirt and trench coat, painting him in his victim's blood.

“Mr. Ripper,” Faye couldn’t look at him for too long, so instead, she kept her eyes trained on the cloth she used to wash her floors. “I don’t have anything to repay you with for… for this.”

“You look like sh*t, runt.” The door clicked shut behind him, boots squelching against the hardwood as he stepped forward. “Take a break. I’ll make us some tea.”

“You’ll… make us some tea?” Faye echoed numbly, brows furrowing. Did Kenny even know how to make tea? It just didn’t seem like the type of skillset he would be interested in knowing, let alone putting to use.

“My nephew insisted on drinking that sh*t day in and day out, learned a thing or two from the squirt,” he shrugged, taking steady steps towards Faye, who hadn’t moved like he asked. “Said it tasted better than the piss-water we were used to drinking.” He didn’t make any sudden movements, gently hooked his hands under Faye’s arms before he heaved her up, muttering out, “Come on, attagirl, upsie-daisies.”

“Kenny?”

She felt him freeze, fingers tightening around her arms as the name left her lips. Her legs dangled, grazing the ground, but Kenny didn’t put her down immediately, hesitating for a split second. Then he let out a soft snort.

“sh*t, kid. I think that’s the first time you’ve ever called me by my name. Keep that up, and you’ll make me go soft for you.” He loosened his grip, finally letting Faye’s feet meet the floor. “You should eat more. Put on some weight. You weigh less than a rabbit.”

“You mind if I stay the night?” The words came out gruff, his shoulders hunching as water puddled around his feet on the floor. He was still soaked to the bone, but the warmth inside The Tea House helped stave off his shivering.

“That’s the least I could do,” Faye hovered near the door, staring down at the water dripping down Kenny’s coat. “Let me go get you a spare change of clothes.”

He heard her footsteps on the wooden stairs, shaking his head just slightly. That girl… What a complete and utter nutcase. Who, in their right mind, would agree to let a serial killer stay with her? It was like she didn’t give two sh*ts about her own life. Maybe he was just thinking about it too hard, though. Maybe she actually… trusted him? He found that hard to believe. He was a revered serial killer, and Faye didn’t strike him as the stupid type.

“Hey,” Faye broke Kenny out of his thoughts, “These are some of my dad’s old clothes, but they look like they’ll fit.” She held the neatly folded clothes out, watching as Kenny carefully took them from her hands. “There’s a washroom just up the stairs to the far right.”

Kenny’s lips twitched, and he nodded in thanks, following her directives. Faye watched his back as he disappeared behind the door, footsteps thundering on her stairs.

A quivered breath left Faye’s lips, the first and only of the night. It was all she could afford since Kenny the Ripper was still lingering around her tea shop, and she’d be damned if she let any tears slip by while she was in danger of being seen by one murderer to another. Her pride was too fragile to survive an instance like that.

So instead, Faye settled herself in at the small table in the corner of her kitchen and steadied herself. He was only staying one night, and she could last until tomorrow evening after she cleaned up shop.

It wasn’t long before Kenny made his way back to the kitchen, dawning fresh clothes. He looked a lot warmer and more at ease, and it made Faye feel better that he wasn’t dripping rainwater all over her floors.

“Kenny,” Faye started, brows furrowing. “If you had a daughter, would you...” The question was stupid, but lately, it singed the back of her mind, nagging and annoying her with its tenacity. “Would you want her to marry?”

Kenny bristled at Faye’s words, though he didn’t turn around to regard her. His movements in shoveling tea leaves out from the tin canister slowed, and his spine went rigid for a split second, prompting Faye to continue.

“Because my dad keeps telling me that I can find a good husband, that he’ll forgive me for my past in Shiganshina, and we’ll turn over a new leaf together and start a family,” Her innards were already recoiling at how dumb the thought was. “But I… I don’t think I’m interested in finding someone who’s willing to forgive me. I just want someone to accept me as I am. Maybe I’m asking for too much, though.” Faye mumbled the last part out, sighing at the end. “I’m not particularly eager to marry anyone, but the kid inside of me keeps picturing what I’ll look like on my wedding day, you know? The gown, the flowers, the church, but whenever I try to imagine what my future husband might look like, all I can see is—”

“Marriage is pointless for someone like you and me,” Finally, he turned and leaned on the counter, crossing his arms. His lips were pulled into a thin line, and for once in Kenny’s life, he wasn’t making a joke out of the conversation at hand. “Men are pigs, and women are just a fun game for them to play. The second you get married is the second you lose all your freedom. All this money you’re raking in with your sh*tty teashop? It’ll become his money. They won’t be your kids; they’ll be his kids. You won’t have your name anymore; you’ll have his . Your side business will be forfeited, and all those geezers you treat are going to get left behind. You think a husband in this day and age isn’t going to report you for practicing medicine without a license? Think again.” The lines around Kenny’s eyes deepened, soul dimming with every word he spoke. “If you get married, your whole life is going to go up in flames, or your marriage is going to be built on pillars of lies.”

“Kenny...” Faye whispered, throat closing in on itself.

“But what do I know?” He shrugged, turning back around as the kettle started whistling. “I’m just a serial killer. Not exactly the ‘Daddy Dearest’ type, if you haven’t noticed.”

“You know more than me.”

*

“Isn’t it about that time of the month?” Alexander’s chin rested on his palm as he boredly stared out at the small group crowded around one table in the corner of the shop.

“Since when are you tracking my menstrual cycle?” Faye raised an eyebrow, tilting her head at the boy. “I didn’t even know you actually listened to me whenever I complained about that sort of thing.”

“Okay, first of all,” Al’ raised his free hand, pointing his index finger up. “I listen to everything you say. I just don’t remember it all. Second of all, your period isn’t set to start until next week, so lay off the bitchy attitude until then. And third off,” he raised an extra two fingers, finally deigning to meet Faye’s gaze with a hardened frown. “I was talking about that guy in the expensive-looking hat and trenchcoat. The one with nice shoes.”

“He was here two weeks ago,” Faye sighed, glancing up from her logbook. “Stayed the night and left in the morning before I opened the shop up.”

“You—he stayed the night?!” Alexander’s eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets as he gaped at the woman, mind running wild with possibilities. “Like—” He lowered his voice, glancing around the room to make sure no one else was listening in. “—like in the same bed?”

“He took the floor,” Faye deadpanned, squinting at her associate. “He’s like twice my age. That’s nasty.”

“Not my fault you don’t know how to pick a man—”

“Not true! Just because I choose not to doesn’t mean I can’t,” Faye defended, scowling at the thirteen-year-old. “I could pick a man if I wanted to. There just aren’t any interesting husband prospects around, that’s all.”

“You’re almost twenty, and you’re still not married,” Al’ rested his hand on his hip, “Face it, Faye. You’re going to be a spinster.”

“So what if she is?”

The air went stale, the color draining from Alexander’s face as he slowly craned his neck to peer up at the tall man. From his angle, Kenny’s teeth were pulled into a predatory grin, daring the boy to speak against him.

“I—I just— Faye just—”

“Al’ was just teasing me,” Faye interjected, setting her hand over the boy’s shoulder in a comforting gesture. “Why don’t we take this conversation to the kitchen? Alexander can keep watch over the shop while we discuss business.”

“You mind if I have a word with the squirt first?” Kenny slung his arm around Alexander’s shoulders, forcing the boy halfway over the counter and into his torso. “It’s a man-to-man conversation, nothing you’d be too interested in.” He batted his eyes in mock innocence, trying to come off as harmless despite his reputation.

“I don’t think—”

“Just give me two minutes,” Kenny cut in, loosening his grip on the boy. “You can get the goods ready in the meantime; what do ya’ say?”

“It’s up to Al’,” The illicit doctor quietly conceded, watching her employee. He was sweating bullets, hands having gone clammy while his face had lost its color. There was absolutely no way Alexander would agree.

“I’ll—I’ll do it.” His voice trembled as his chin did, and the ginger-haired boy looked like he was on the verge of having a meltdown, but for his and Faye’s sake, he held it together the best he could. “Come on, mister, I’ll—I’ll talk to you.” Alexander swallowed the lump in his throat, though his racing heart did little to steady his nerves.

“Come on, kid,” Kenny led the way into the kitchen with Alexander in tow, taking long strides. He didn’t look back to check on the boy who was nearly sh*tting his pants in dread, nor did he care. He had made up his mind about talking to the little runt a week and a half prior when he finally figured it out, and there was no going back now. “Take a seat.”

“Yes, sir.”

Kenny studied Alexander’s face, noting how pale he looked and the sweat beaded on his temple. His hands were quivering, but he was smart to clasp them together in an attempt to steady himself. The kid was shaken up, that much was obvious, but if he was too busy panicking, would he really listen and understand what Kenny had to say?

“Take a deep breath; I’m not here to hurt or kill you.” Kenny leaned back in his chair, languidly taking his hat off while his free elbow came up to rest on the backrest. “I wanna talk to you about Faye.”

“Faye?” Alexander furrowed his brows, “You’re not gonna kill her either, are you?”

“How much do you know about her little side hustle?” The serial killer avoided the question, instead choosing to ask his own. There was no way in hell Kenny would admit to sparing Faye if it ever came down to it.

“Just that Faye sells drugs on the side and has a secret medical clinic where she treats a few people.” Al’ fiddled with his thumbs, twirling them around each other as he squirmed under Kenny’s gaze.

“You ever wonder why she started in the first place?”

“Well, yeah. Everyday,” The boy mumbled, shyly looking away from the adult. “I tried asking her about it a while ago, but she never answered.”

“You ever think you’re the reason she started and that she didn’t tell you because she didn’t want you to feel bad?” The words were blunt, but it wasn’t like he had time to beat around the bush just to spare the kid’s feelings. “When I first came around, and I saw you, you were skin and bones. You’ve put on quite a bit of weight.”

“Only because...” Kenny could practically see the realization dawning on Alexander as he trailed off, eyes widening at the revelation. “Because Faye started to pay me more...”

“Next time you want to tease your boss, I’d think twice about everything she’s done for you,” The serial killer articulated, pulling his hat to his head again. He left the boy sitting at the table, allowing him to think in silence as he got to his feet and exited. A kid like that shouldn’t bite the hand that quite literally feeds it.

Kenny pushed the door open, letting out a deep breath. This wasn’t any of his business, so it made no sense for him to meddle in it, but still… He couldn’t help the nagging little itch inside his brain that begged him to intervene. Faye didn’t suit the criminal lifestyle she sported, and Alexander needed a harsh dose of reality.

“Is Al’ okay?”

Kenny let his lips curl downward, stiffening in place for a heartbeat, hand still gripping tightly to the doorknob. Faye’s lips had been pulled into a thin line, hands wringing the hem of her shirt as she stared up with big eyes.

“He’s fine.” The serial killer grunted, stepping forward. “Give him a few minutes.”

“We can chat here if you want,” Faye nudged a stool over from beside her, “It’ll look less conspicuous if we’re talking out in the open like this. And it’s far enough away from the rest of my customers that we won’t be eavesdropped on.”

“You do this often?” Kenny relented to Faye’s offer, settling in next to her while he leaned on the counter, lips twitching.

“Sometimes,” She shrugged, bending over to trifle in one of her drawers. “Anyways, I’ve got your order for this month; it’s all in the back just waiting to be picked up.”

“About that,” He mentally scowled at himself, unease coiling in his stomach. “I’m short on money this month; you mind if I pay you back some other way?” He made sure to keep his chin up, clinging tightly to the image he carved in blood and angst for himself. “I was thinkin’ I could teach you how to use a knife properly.”

“Killing doesn’t pay the job?” Faye quipped, grinning at the glower she received from the man.“Yeah, that’s fine, though. After what happened with those guys, I almost think it would be dumb of me to turn your offer down.”

“Guns don’t do you well if you can’t keep one on you at all times,” Kenny lowly voiced. “That shotgun you’re keeping here can only do so much, only hold so many rounds, only kill so many people. But a knife? It’s versatile enough that it can last a lifetime. You’ll never run out of ways to kill someone.”

The way he spoke, Faye couldn’t discern whether he enjoyed the killing or revered it. Maybe both. Maybe he enjoyed it because he revered it… Got drunk off the thrill of fear.

“So,” Faye glanced at the group in the corner, gathering their cups in hand as they started clearing their table. “When exactly do you want to start these knife lessons?”

Chapter 25: 20. Calm Before the Storm

Chapter Text

The room tilted on its axis, the bed rotating beneath Faye as she pushed the thin blanket away from her body. Bile was rising in her throat, and she couldn’t quite figure out why, but just as it made its way up her throat did she swallow it back down, distantly hearing Alexander’s panicked questions. His vowels hit the air in a twisted and slurred rush too quick for Faye to make any sense of the gibberish he was speaking.

“Faye?” Alexander’s voice raised in pitch, his panic peeking through despite his efforts to keep it hidden. “I don’t think— I don’t think you should be moving around yet. You—you still have stitches, and your ribs aren’t done healing yet. Why are you— Faye?!”

His words went in one ear and out the other as the scout captain ignored her best friend and instead focused on using the wall for support as she clambered forward.

“Alexander,” Faye cut in tersely, “How long was I out for?” She didn’t glance back at the boy, too intent on making it out of the hospital room. It was grimy, and she felt suffocated in it. Maybe it was all the dust floating around or the faint smell of cigarettes that lined the blankets. Whatever it was, Faye couldn’t stomach being confined in the hospital room.

“Thirteen days, but I really don’t think you should be getting out of bed, Faye.” He reached a hand out, furrowing his brows when she flinched at the sudden contact, but wrapped his fingers around her arm regardless. “You haven’t fully recovered, and you—”

“I know,” She didn’t hiss it out or snap, but her words swept over the two, easily silencing Alexander with two words. “I just… I need to talk to Levi and Erwin.”

“What’s the rush?” Al’ questioned, “They’re not going anywhere, and we aren’t going on any expeditions anytime soon, so why are you practically scrambling to find those two?” He flexed his fingers on her arm before he let go, then, quieter, he added: “Why are you so intent on leaving me?”

“I’m not trying to leave you, Al,” Finally, she stepped back into the room and shut the door behind her, sighing as she leaned against it. This was a conversation that deigned to have her full attention, and despite the itch in her bones to find her commander and captain, she couldn’t help but silently admit that Alexander needed her just as much.

“Really?” He crossed his arms, pinning Faye with a pointed frown. “Because you literally just woke up, and you seem like you can’t escape this room fast enough. You’ve barely said two words to me, and you flinched — and I mean you f*cking flinched when I tried to touch you.”

“Why does it feel like I’m being accused of something?” Her throat felt like it was closing in on itself as she struggled to take in a full breath. Her entire body felt like it was on fire, burning up from the inside out with searing pain. Her ribs throbbed every time she shuttered in a breath, and the skin around her stitches stretched every time she shifted. “I just—” The hair on the nape of her neck stood on end, senses on high alert as the smell of cigarettes invaded her senses again. “—I just want to feel safe again.”

“Safe?” Alexander’s eyes narrowed, the bags deepening as he continued, “You’re inside the walls, Faye. How much safer could you possibly be?”

For a patronizing heartbeat, Faye said nothing. It wasn’t like she could argue with Alexander. She was inside the walls, Zeke was nowhere to be seen, and for all she knew, another titan gobbled him up after she sedated him and left him dozing off in the forest outside of Wall Rose. What more did she have to be fearful of? It was utterly irrational to keep looking over her shoulder or allow her breath to hitch every time she thought she smelt cigarettes.

“You know,” Alexander couldn’t help the bitter bite in his voice, “I thought that when you woke up, you’d be really happy to see me. We would hug, and Beef would be here, and you would finally tell me what exactly happened out there, but I’m realizing that was too much to ask for.”

“Al’,” Faye tried, “I’m happy to see you, I swear that I am.” Her eyes softened, if only slightly, and she swallowed the lump in her throat, forcing the words to hit the open air. “But I can’t stay here in this crappy hospital. I’m getting nauseous off the smell of piss-poor disinfectant, the sheets all smell like a chain-smoker slept in them, and this room is making me claustrophobic. I just want to go home and have some tea.”

“So let’s go home,” Al reasoned, taking a small step towards the woman. He towered over her, canting his head to stare directly into Faye’s eyes. He didn’t notice the way she pressed herself against the wall, trying to lean away from his daunting figure. “Let’s go back to Trost and reopen the tea shop. You don’t need to sell drugs anymore, and you can focus on your under-the-table hospital. We don’t need to stay in the Scouts, Faye. We shouldn’t have to deal with the titans — you shouldn’t have to deal with the titans. You were never meant to fight like this.”

“You know I can’t just abandon them now,” Faye squeezed her eyes shut, trying to blink away the hotness in her eyes. “I’m in too deep, and Erwin and Levi aren’t going to let me slip through the cracks anymore.” She couldn’t even imagine trying to return to a normal life after the sh*t she had seen. As a kid, it was easier to assimilate into the masses within the walls, but now — now she understood too much about herself, and the guilt would kill her from the inside out if she let it fester again. “I was always meant to fight; you just never knew that side of me.”

“You’re not the king, Faye,” Alexander interjected, lips pulling into a deep-rooted scowl. “You’re not part of the royal family, so why is all of this your responsibility? The king is the one who should be concerning himself with finding a way to kill all the titans so we can live our lives free of the walls.” He raked a hand through his hair, tugging near the base of his skull as he struggled to understand his best friend. “Why do you always do this? It’s like you can’t just leave it alone. You have to take all the weight of the world and the burden of carrying it all, and you can’t let it go. You let it all sit on you until you get so stressed that you just can’t f*cking take it anymore, and I’m— I’m—” The words caught on his throat, eyes welling with tears against his volition. “— worried about you.”

“Alexander, I’m—”

“If you try to tell me you’re fine, I’m going to throw a fit,” Al snapped, gritting his teeth together. “You’re not fine. You’ve got cracked ribs and stab wounds. You flinched at me when I tried to help you through the door. You’re the furthest f*cking thing from fine that I’ve ever laid eyes on, Faye.” His anger was seeping out from his eyes in salty liquid that dribbled down his cheeks. “Just let me help you. You don’t need to stay in the Scouting Regiment. You’ve done your part. Let yourself rest, for f*cks sake.”

Faye bit her lip, her heart palpitating faster than a horse could gallop as she swallowed down her irrational fear. She would have rathered keep her distance from the boy — at least until she felt okay in her own skin, but Alexander’s world was crashing and burning around him, and she couldn’t allow him to think so poorly of her. Not when he had probably been idling his time away by her bedside for the last thirteen days.

Her fingertips twitched, eyes darting to glance around the room for the familiar weight of a rifle to help quell the disquietude bubbling in her chest, but her heart sank at the lack of dangerous weapons in her room. She couldn’t meet Alexander’s eyes, not as she took a small step forward and forced her arms to circle around his waist, and she did her best to not jump out of her skin when Al’ reciprocated the action.

“Al’,” She mumbled, sucking in a breath of air as her insides turned at the contact. Maybe this was a step too far too soon… “I know it’s killing you inside to watch me bend over backwards for the Scouts, but I can’t leave them to clean up my messes like this.” It came out in a wheezy, shuttered breath, ribs flaring under the minuscule weight of Alexander’s arms. “No one else knows how to fix this, and I—I’m the only one who knows anything that might help us avoid a war.”

“A civil war?” He squinted, “We haven’t had a war inside the walls in years, Faye. I don’t know where you’re getting this information, but it’s bogus. It’s all wrong; why would anyone—”

“No.” Faye took a rushed step back, exiting the warmth of Alexander’s arms as her temples throbbed. “No, no, no, no, no, no . You don’t— no one gets it.” Her words came out tightly; lips thinned as she did her best to keep her frustration at bay. “I’m alone in the walls. No one knows who I am, and I’m—I’m all alone. You have no idea how hard it is to live a lie day after day. I’m a wolf in sheep’s clothing, and I’m going to be the reason you’re all killed.”

“You’re not making any sense,” Alexander took a step forward, but he froze mid-step at the sight of Faye pressing her back into the wall, chest heaving up and down. “Why don’t you just sit back down and just tell me what the hell is going on, Faye?”

“I don’t have time, Alexander,” Her eyes narrowed, “He got into the walls once, and—and what if he got in again? What if—” No. She couldn’t bring herself to voice the words that circled in her head, picking her apart like a vulture. What if he found her again?

“You always do this, Faye. Just tell me. Tell me and get it done and over with.” Al’ pressed, trying not to take another step towards his captain. He might have been angry, but he didn’t want to spook her — he knew better than most about just how unpredictable she could be when backed into a corner. “You said that no one knows who you are, so tell me so that you won’t be alone anymore.”

“Alexander, I told you that before I tell you anything, Erwin and Levi should—”

“They don’t even know you, Faye,” Alexander blurted out, “They’ve known you for what? Two and a half months? I’ve known you for ten whole years, so what does that make me? Huh? The forgotten one that lives in the back of your head whenever you’re bored?” His heartbeat thundered inside his ears as he cautiously took another step forward, gazing down at Faye, who shrunk under the intensity of his stare. “Ever since you met them, you changed. You never cried, you never got hurt this often, you never argued with me, and you never abandoned me like you did when you sent me off with the commander and Captain Levi. At least you had Mike; I had no one. No one to comfort me when you went missing, no one to comfort me when you came back half-dead, and I have no one to comfort me now.”

“What, are you looking for an apology from me? You want me to apologize for saving your life?” Faye shot back, “Mike is dead. He died getting his limbs ripped off by titans as they ate him to death. What the hell am I supposed to tell Nanaba? How am I supposed to tell her that he’s—that he’s— goddamnit,” Faye squeezed her eyes shut, biting down on her tongue to focus on the physical pain rather than the gaping hole in her chest. “Just piss off, Al’. I haven’t even been conscious for five minutes. If you don’t want to help me find Erwin and Levi, I’ll do it myself.”

“Yourself?” Alexander scoffed, “Your ribs are still cracked, and you’ve got stitches. Where the hell are you planning on going? Down the hallway? You’re not going to get very far without getting flagged down by a nurse unless you decide to go through the window.”

A half-baked snort left Faye’s lips as she twisted the doorknob behind her and peeked her head out, glancing both ways before she sucked in a deep breath. Her ribs shifted under the pressure of her lungs inflating so heavily, but still, she braced herself.

“Can I get a nurse in here?” Faye waved her hand in the air, locking eyes with a lady behind the desk who looked to be doing paperwork. “I just woke up, and I’d like to get a check-up and patient plan for my injuries.”

“Ms. Jaeger,” The nurse’s eyes widened, lips dropping open to gape. “You—you shouldn’t be walking around,” She rushed from around the desk, legs taking small, quick steps. “Your ribs—your stitches. You need to rest; I’ll— Oh dear. I’ll send a messenger out right away to notify Commander Smith. You climb back into bed, and I’ll get the doctor immediately.”

The nurse scurried off, hurrying past other patients and staff.

“Whatever,” Alexander bristled as he took a disgusted step back, “You let the Commander and Captain rush to your side. See if I give a damn. I’m going to go check up on Beef and make sure he’s not getting into trouble. One of us has to be a responsible parent to the f*cking cat.” He slipped right past Faye, shoving his hands in his pockets as he wandered down the hallway, disappearing into the thicket of patients meandering around the halls.

*

Levi’s lips thinned as he stared down at Faye from his seat on the couch, brows knitting together. The tea had long since gone cold, not that it mattered. The tea was the last of his worries. Instead, his focus was honed in on Faye’s words, replaying them over and over again in his head as he struggled to discern whether or not he should just confront Faye about what really happened then and there.

“And that’s all you have to report?” Erwin raised a bushy brow, leaning back in the chair as he broadened his shoulders. The bastard had this uncanny ability to make anyone feel awfully tiny in his shadow, and apparently, Faye was no exception.

“Is there anything else you’re looking for?” She evaded, nearly shrinking under the intense bout of eye contact her commander seemed hellbent on maintaining.

“I just think it’s curious that you’ve glossed over how you received those injuries, that’s all,” Erwin shrugged, tilting his head as he flitted his eyes over the bruises around Faye’s neck. He did his best not to come off as imposing or threatening, but the thought that she felt the need to keep it a secret nagged at the back of his head like an annoying itch he couldn’t quite reach.

Levi’s shoulders tensed, unable to look away from the scene. His heartbeat thundered in his ears, palms going sweaty as he waited. That was bold of Erwin, though Levi wasn’t about to complain about his direct approach.

“Zeke stabbed me, so what?” Faye stiffly questioned. “Can’t really blame the guy considering I shot at him with the intent to kill.”

“And your ribs?” The commander patiently pressed. The sunlight framed his face, lighting his hair up in a halo of gold. He might have looked unassuming and innocent to anyone who might have walked in on the conversation, but in Levi’s eyes, he was a wolf eagerly watching his prey. He was starved for the information Faye held, but he refused to give up his gentlemanly act. “How exactly did they get fractured within the fray of things?”

Levi noted the way her fingers twitched, eyes darting around the room—searching— for something. Vaguely, the action felt familiar, though he couldn’t quite place why. She never came off as a twitchy or nervous individual, but he could have sworn he had seen Faye repeat the motion in past experiences. Maybe he was just overthinking it, though. Perhaps he was so hyperfocused on memorizing how Faye looked when she was conscious that he imagined things.

“What exactly happened after you left?” Faye quietly asked, once again evading giving an actual answer. “When I met back up with Reiner and Bertholdt, they had Eren and Krista. And what happened to Ymir? Is she okay?”

“Historia.” Levi’s voice filled his ears. “If she’s on our rag-tag squad, we might as well know her sh*tty name.”

“Our?” Her eyebrows pinched together, fingers tightening around the sh*tty hospital blanket. “I thought I asked you not to give me a squad to babysit, Erwin. I don’t want to be in charge of someone else’s life. I can barely keep mine from slipping through the cracks.”

“I vetoed your request.” Erwin cut in, “Despite having lived this far, I made the executive decision as your commander to put you and Levi in charge of a squad together. Maybe having him by your side will reduce the possibility of another incident transpiring like what happened with Mike.”

“What happened with Mike?” Faye sputtered for a moment, the colour draining from her face. “Erwin, that wasn’t just an incident, that was an entire life that got cut from the cloth because—”

“Whatever the case, I’ve made my decision, and it’s final.” The commander’s words left the room cold, eyes piercing straight through Faye’s resolve like a spear. He wore the same tightened expression as when he gave an order he would hate himself for, lips pulled into a cinched line, shoulders back and chin held high. “I expect you to carry out your orders like a dedicated soldier.”

Faye pressed her lips together bitterly, eyes glaring a hole through the blanket as she focused her gaze toward her lap. She said nothing, though her silence seemed to scream out into the void inside of Levi. Maybe he was just overthinking it, but he could have sworn he saw her hands tighten into fists for a split second.

“Now, with that having been said, I believe your first task should be concentrated on recuperating,” If Erwin noticed how resentful Faye sank, he did an excellent job of hiding it. “We need our head medic in pristine condition, especially if we plan to get to Shiganshina anytime soon.”

A knock sounded on the door before a nurse peeked her head inside, scanning the room with sharp eyes. “Excuse me,” She smiled, opening the door a little wider before she set foot into the room. “I’ve been asked to administer some more painkillers to Ms. Jaeger, so I hope you don’t mind the intrusion.”

“Not at all,” Erwin gave a tight smile as he got to his feet, “Captain Levi and I were just heading back to HQ.” He was precise in looking back at Faye, eyes softening if only slightly at the sight of her. “I’ll have Levi escort you back in 2 hours. That should be plenty of time for the doctors to discharge you.”

She didn’t say anything, merely gave a slight hum of acknowledgment. Her eyes had dulled, lips relaxing, and Levi couldn’t help but wonder where her consciousness had been pulled away to.

He followed Erwin out, not daring to look back again. Something inside Levi died every time he let his eyes catch on the bruises and minor cuts, and he wasn’t sure he could keep the emotion from leeching onto his face for much longer. The anger kept festering inside the pits of his stomach, and the last person he wanted to upset with his scathing temper was Faye.

“Awfully quiet today, Levi,” Erwin noted, closing the door behind him as they ventured into the hallway.

“She didn’t mention it.”

The commander faltered in his footsteps, peering over his shoulder to regard Levi. Humanity’s Strongest might have put up an indifferent facade to Faye’s situation. Still, the longer Erwin stuck around to witness the short man’s emotions coming to a full-throttle, the deeper he realized Levi’s emotions ran.

“No,” Erwin sighed. “She didn’t.” He turned back to the hallway, regaining his pace through the warm bodies in the hospital. “Did she seem at all… nervous, to you?”

Levi gave an affirmative hum, “What did you say to her before you reached the walls to set her on edge like that?”

“You think I was the source of her discomfort?” The commander’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline as he processed Levi’s accusation.

“You didn’t notice the way she kept trying to inch away from you every time you leaned in close, or the paranoid way she cringed every time you went to squeeze her shoulder? She couldn’t even look you in the eyes for more than a few seconds at a time.” The short captain gave an irritated huff, his forehead creasing as his mind flitted back to the way her fingers twitched when Erwin questioned her about her ribs. “She’s traumatized beyond belief, but she refuses to let anyone help her. Stupid f*cking doctor.”

“She mentioned you,” It was a quiet admittance, ghosting over Erwin’s lips as he spoke. “Just as the titans were descending on us, she mentioned that you would help bear the weight of all her kills.”

“She’s still going on about that?” Levi forced a scoff out, “I told her to drop it. No one gives two sh*ts about all the lives she took except Nile Dok.”

“Yes, well, I doubt Nile could absolve her of her sins.” Erwin held his breath for a heartbeat, waiting for Levi to say something — anything — if only to fill the void.

“What else do you think she’s hiding?” Humanity’s Strongest held the door open for his commander, grimacing at how bright the sun was. “She knew about titans being human and the wall titan, but she didn’t give us any sh*tty explanation.”

“Hard to say,” Erwin maintained. “It’s likely that she’s sitting on a mountain of knowledge, and we’re the fools without the proper gear to traverse it.” He meant to just leave the rest of his words hang, but something inside his throat begged him to continue, “It’s only a matter of time before her throne of lies crumbles, and I’d rather her be at a safe distance; when it does.”

*

Alexander squinted at Faye from his seat across from her in the infirmary, pursing his lips. She looked awful, that much was known, but if she felt half as terrible as she looked, why the hell was she forcing herself to complete paperwork?

“You’re going to burn a hole through my forehead if you keep glaring like that.”

“Shouldn’t you be resting? You’re easier to babysit when you’re unconscious.” Alexander muttered out, lips curling down. He didn’t look away, though his eyes looked to have rounded out to neutralize the scathing irritation.

“Tell that to me the next time I break my ribs,” Faye quipped, doing her best to give a small smile, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Besides, I have a stack of paperwork bigger than my head, and I know how much you loathe forging my signature.”

“Just you wait,” Al’ gripped tightly to his pen, “When Trost is finished being repaired, I’m going back to the teashop with Beef, and you’re going to be stuck here alone. Let’s see how you like being lonely and surrounded by apathetic people.” Angrily, he scribbled down his name at the bottom of the paper, shoving it off to the side.

“Al’...” Faye trailed off, throat closing in on itself.

“Don’t. You don’t get to call me that anymore.” Alexander shot to his feet, pushing the chair away with how quick he was. “If you want to act like a bitch who isn’t even happy to see her best friend, then I don’t want to hear it. I waited for you like a horse waits for its rider, and you never came back.” He licked his lips, heart hammering inside his chest. “I don’t know what the hell happened to you, but you changed. I don’t recognize you, and I’m scared I never will.”

Faye didn’t even have time to respond before Alexander swept his paperwork into his hands and stomped off, leaving her to mumble out a small, “So am I...”

The boy’s footsteps echoed off the cobblestone as he stormed down the corridor, grumbling under his breath. He was fuming, absolutely disgusted with Faye, and he couldn’t control himself when it came to being in Faye’s presence. Her silence festered something inside of him, twisting his emotions so viciously that he could barely think straight.

Maybe that was why he hadn’t heard the second pair of footsteps that marched behind him.

Alexander’s vision was a blur of slated grey as the collar of his military jacket was yanked, and all his paperwork flew into the air, feathering down above him as his ass hit the cold ground, hands yanked above his head while weight settled on his stomach.

Levi glared down, eyes glinting dangerously in the sun’s twilight. His lips had been pulled into a tight line, stance tense but ready. For a heartbeat, he let the silence deafen his surroundings, privy only to the sound of paper floating down around the pair.

“What?” Alexander hissed, “Were you spying on us?!”

Levi’s patience ran thin, lips pulling into a heavy frown.

“You’re acting like a kid,” The captain growled. “Faye just woke up, and you can’t see past your own selfishness, you sh*tty, f*cking brat.”

“At least she wanted you,” The boy squeezed his eyes together. “She didn’t even say anything to me when she woke up. Didn’t even acknowledge me. All she wanted was you and the commander.”

“She was raped.”

The air went stale, curdling like milk that had been left out in the sun on a particularly hot day. Alexander’s stomach keeled, the air rushing from his lungs as he struggled to comprehend precisely what Levi had just said. It was only three words, spoken so quietly he could have imagined it, but they were bathed in unadulterated honesty. A truth so blunt it sliced through to the very core of his soul.

“What?” Alexander breathed, eyes going wide as he stilled beneath Levi.

“I’m not f*cking saying it again, Ral.”

Al’ blinked, chest rising up and down rapidly as he struggled to take in a full breath. His head felt like it was splitting open right down the middle of his forehead, and the more he tried to process and analyze Levi’s words, the more nauseous he became.

“How do you know?” Alexander murmured hoarsely, teeth chewing at his bottom lip. He waited for a few heartbeats, though when his captain didn’t answer, the anxiety within his stomach swelled. “I asked you how you know, dammit! Don’t pick now to go mute, you asshole. f*cking answer me, that’s my best friend you’re talking about.”

“I questioned the doctor who operated on her.” Levi forced the words to come out monotonously, scowling down at the boy. “The next time you want to act like a sh*t-stained brat, think twice about it.” The captain shoved down on Alexander’s hands, pushing himself off the boy’s torso and to his feet. “You’re a soldier. Start acting like it.”

“Why didn’t she—” Alexander swallowed the lump in his throat, unmoving from his spot on the ground as he looked up at Levi. “—why didn’t she tell me?”

Levi glanced out the window, eyes settling on the fading light of the sun. His face was painted violet, eyes shifting into a muted gunmetal colour. For a long time, he didn’t say anything, pondering over that exact question. In truth, he didn’t have a good answer, but he couldn’t just let himself hang in the balance of her feelings. If it were him, why wouldn’t he have told anyone?

“She’s trying to save her dignity,” Levi said it slowly, tasting the words as they flitted through on his tongue. “She refuses to let anyone else in because—” He hesitated, running his tongue along his teeth as he thought about what to say. “—because she’s in a vulnerable state right now.”

Alexander furrowed his brows, finally sitting himself up. “In the hospital, right after she woke up,” The boy glanced around the empty corridor, searching for any signs of life besides his and Levi’s. “She said she just wanted to feel safe again.” It was a bitter realization, but one he needed to admit. “I think you and Commander Smith can do that for her.”

“Get over yourself, Ral,” Levi scoffed, spinning on his heel as he started back towards Faye’s office. He didn’t look back, and he certainly didn’t allow any pity to linger in the pits of his stomach for the boy. He was undeserving of it, and until he learned how to act like a sh*tty adult, Levi wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.

Levi knocked on the wooden door before he pulled it open and let himself in, leaning on the doorframe as he watched Faye work. She hadn’t glanced up from the stack of papers, but considering the fact that her pen wasn’t moving, it was safe to say he had her full attention.

“Did Eren deliver those field reports?”

“Yeah,” Faye gave a small hum, shoulders visibly easing as she leaned back in her seat. She sluggishly turned her head, mustering a small smile as she regarded Levi tiredly. “He gave me this big lecture about needing to be more safe and alert before he left.”

“Like he’s one to talk.” A small hmph left Levi’s throat, lips threatening to twitch into the slightest smile known to mankind. He waited with bated breath for Faye to send up some kind of reaction or an acknowledgment to his sarcasm, but he found himself vaguely disappointed when she showed no humour.

“Your office is covered in dust,” Levi noted, leading the way out of HQ. “You want me to—”

“I’ll do it.”

Humanity’s Strongest struggled to hold back his eye roll. Of course, she would be too stubborn to accept help. Regardless of what he thought, it was ultimately her decision, and if she didn’t want to accept his offer, he wouldn’t force it on her just like he wouldn’t force her to talk about what happened until she was ready.

And so, he let the conversation lull.

“Is Erwin upset with me?”

“No,” Levi stiffly replied. Of all the thoughts swirling around in her little head, she was concerned with whether or not Erwin was mad at her?

“Are you upset with me?”

“No.”

“Then why are you acting so distant?” Faye huffed, carefully crossing her arms to keep from further injuring her ribs. “You’ve been staring at me like I grew a third head, and you’ve barely said ten words to me. So what is it? Did I piss you off? Do you pity me? Are you uninterested in pursuing a friendship with me because I’m not strong enough? Because I couldn’t save Mike? Because I couldn’t kill my twin?”

“No.”

“Well, you should be.”

It was so quietly spoken that Levi nearly thought he’d imagined it all together. When he focused on her face, he was met with the crestfallen tilt on her lips, eyes downcast and shoulders hunched. She couldn’t even meet his eyes, bathing and drowning in her own self-pity and guilt.

“Get some sleep,” Humanity’s Strongest sighed, slipping away from the doorframe. “You’re overthinking everything.”

“Levi,” Faye startled him by using his name, gluing his feet to the floor as he listened with rapt attention. “If you were angry with me, you would tell me, right?” She stared up at him, vulnerability peeking through her eyelids.

His breath hitched at the sight of her. The muted light sifted in through the window just right , and if Levi hadn’t known any better, he might have briefly wondered if Faye was even human. A soft orange glow surrounded her head like an angel’s halo, a stark contrast to the twilight which fell over her office like a shroud.

It was an easy question, and for a split second, Levi grappled between the two possibilities. He couldn’t even remember an instance where he was angry with Faye. Maybe when she performed CPR on Petra’s mother, or the first time he had met her, but those couldn’t come close to being described as “Angry.”

“Ask me when you don’t look sh*tty.”

The door clicked shut behind him as he leaned on it, bowing his head at the turn of silence and solitude he felt at the physical wall and door separating him from Faye.

What a sh*tty mess he found himself knee-deep in.

*

Nile sat at his desk, face flickering in the odd glow of his lantern. Messy handwriting littered the pages sprawled across his desk, covering the wood underneath with his notes. All the words were bleeding into one another in his mind, eyes bloodshot, while the bags beneath his eyes only worsened with each passing minute.

His time frame for sleep was evaporating with each heartbeat he spent staring down at her name, but he didn’t care. Not when he was so close to finally gaining justice. To ending the source of his disquietude in the world. To ending the living, breathing thing that had taken more lives than he could physically comprehend.

“Premier Zachary,” Nile grit out, ink flowing out of the pen as he wrote. “I’m writing to you yet again to request another court hearing for Scout Captain Faye and the atrocities she’s committed against our citizens...”

The ink bled into the paper, pen sinking aggressively as he continued. He was so incredibly close to sleeping soundly again, to eating a meal without his mind getting clouded over with—

“Nile, dear,” Marie leaned on the doorframe, brows raised and eyes hopeful. “Come to bed; it’s getting late, and—”

“f*ck off, Marie,” The Military Police Commander growled through clenched teeth. “Later. I’ll sleep when she’s dead.” He didn’t bother looking up from his letter to glance at his wife, too encapsulated with the words he was intent on writing down. “She’s got nowhere else to run. I’m claiming justice for all those poor sons of bitches she murdered.”

“Nile,” Marie tried again, taking a small step toward her husband. “I’m worried about you.”

“It’s almost over, Marie. It’ll all be over in a few days.”

Chapter 26: 21. The Attempt to Bury the Rings

Chapter Text

The paperwork was mind-numbing. Of all the jobs within the Scouts, signing her name on the dotted line below was by far Faye Jaeger’s least favourite responsibility. Still, though, it was necessary, and she was required to read through the numerous entries before signing off on them and writing her own. It was repetitive, and it made her want to gauge her own eyes out.

Down went her pen, gliding against the paper to finish her last paragraph for the morning. The curve of the letter F had only just started before the silence was interrupted by a knock. She didn’t even need to look up to know who was on the other side of the door, and Faye hollered to let themselves in.

“Captain Faye,” Nifa sidled against the wall to let herself in. “I’m very sorry to intrude, but Commander Smith wanted me to let you know that he requests an immediate meeting with you and me.”

Any village idiot could tell the young soldier was anxious, picking at her nails and bottling her sighs up.

“You’re not here to tell me breakfast is ready and that I should be running down before Erwin breaks down my door and shoves bread down my throat?” Her brows pinched together, lips turning down in confusion. “Well, this is new. Let me grab my cloak, and I’ll be right down.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

True to her word, Faye didn’t waste much time to dawdle, and instead she downed a few pills, slinging her gun around her shoulders and grabbing her medical bag and cloak. Erwin had yet to call her down to his office during the time she was required to stay at HQ, so whatever it was must have been serious.

She knocked twice at his door, waiting for his reply before she let herself in and stood next to Nifa.

He didn’t look well. Beneath his eyes, Erwin sported bags the size of titans, and he had yet to shave the stubble that had grown during the time he went into a coma. The stress was hitting him full force, and it didn’t help that he hadn’t fully recovered from all his wounds yet.

“Faye, you and Nifa need to get to Levi and the rest of your squad by sundown,” There was no light timbre to his voice, and the way he tensed as if mentally preparing himself only added to the stifling atmosphere. “A freeze is about to be put on all Scout activities outside the walls, and I have it on good authority that you, Eren, and Historia will be listed for bounties.”

Well, that wasn’t exactly great news.

“Nifa, you should pack a bag and be ready to leave in two minutes. I need a moment alone with Captain Jaeger.”

“Understood,” Nifa nodded. “I’ll meet you at the back entrance.”

Faye watched the young woman scamper out, eager to escape the eyes of her superiors.

“Faye,” Erwin continued, brushing his fingers through his hair. “I know your ribs aren’t finished healing, but I need you to keep out of trouble. If the Military Police hunt you down, you’ll be executed without a second thought.”

“Hey,” She did her best to smile, stomach turning uncertainly. “I’ve got a month and a half’s worth of painkillers in here, I’ll be fine out there.” She patted the leather bag resting by her hip. “What do you think they’ll do to you, though?”

“It’s likely that I’ll be placed on house arrest,” Erwin leaned back in his chair, rubbing his chin tiredly. “If the pursue for you, Eren, and Historia continues, there’s little hope for mankind to obtain freedom. Eren is our best hope to retake Shiganshina.”

“Why is Historia being targeted?” She canted her head, mind whirling with the possibilities. “Is this because she’s a noble? But what noble-woman would be chased down like this? It makes no sense.”

“Whatever it is, we have to assume it’ll only create problems for us in the future,” He tightly admitted. “If it comes down to her or Eren, I trust you’ll use your discretion to make a wise decision in who lives and who dies.”

Her ears rang in the void. The gears in her mind spun to a halt, screeching and begging her to realize the sirens blaring away. Had he just…

“Let the thought sit for a day or so,” Erwin continued, ignoring the incredulous frown taking over Faye’s lips. “It’s uncomfortable for me to ask you to sacrifice or play god, but it can’t be helped at this point. I still don’t know what it is the Military Police want with her, but it can’t be a coincidence that she and Eren are both being targeted simultaneously.”

*

Faye held her breath at the sight of torches marching through the forest. That was closer than any of them would have liked to admit, and it wouldn’t be easy to stay under the radar of the MPs for very long.

“So, what do we do now?” Connie questioned, pulling his jacket around him tighter. His breath came out in visible puffs, and it didn’t help that the temperatures were starting to drop for the season. It wouldn’t surprise Faye if the frost began early, too.

“Well,” Faye shifted from foot to foot, glancing at Levi, who kept close to her side. “There’s a warrant out for Eren and Historia, and a freeze was put on—”

“What about you?” Jean piped up, eyes narrowing at his captains. “There’s a warrant out for you, too. How are you acting so calm about this? The Interior is probably going to execute you like they did Pastor Nick, and—”

“Jean,” Faye’s voice had lowered an octave, warning the boy not to push any further on the subject. “Let’s focus on one thing at a time. Right now, our priority is getting Eren and Historia somewhere safe.”

“Trost District,” Levi didn’t raise his voice, but his hand moved to gently wrap around Faye’s elbow, pulling himself to stand next to her.

“Why?” Armin questioned, brows furrowing together. His eyes flickered to the slight motion of affection between his captains, though his eyes didn’t linger. “That’s the same place Pastor Nick was killed.”

“It’s worse to head to the interior,” Levi shrugged, “With Trost in a panic, it should be easy to slip in,” He pulled his cloak back to let his ODM gear glint in the moonlight, “And, if it comes down to it, we can use these in the city.”

“Do you think it’ll really come down to that?” Al’s eyes flitted between Faye and Levi, lips pulling into a thin line. “I mean, that gear was made so we could advance in the fight against titans, right? So if we’re using it in Trost—well—that means our target has shifted to focus on humans.”

The air went stale. Each member of Levi and Faye’s squad held their breaths, waiting for their captains to tell Alexander he was wrong, that titans would always be the main enemy of the Scouts, and that whatever the government wanted with Eren and Historia wouldn’t result in either of them getting hurt.

It was a comfort neither captain could provide.

“Hange,” Again, Levi spoke up through the darkness, “Lend me some of your squad.”

“Of course.” The squad leader nodded, “I’m going after Erwin. Moblit’s with me, the rest of you will follow Faye and Levi.”

“Oh,” Eren dug around in his pocket, producing a slip of paper, “I remembered a conversation between Ymir and Bertholdt, here.”

“Thanks,” Hange took it without hesitation, spinning on their heel and taking a tentative step forward, but they paused with the wind as it breezed past. For a second, the silence whistled through the air, deafening the group in a heartbeat. They waited for Hange to speak up, to give one last comment or side remark, or perhaps even give Levi or Faye an earful, but nothing came. They watched Hange mount their horse with Moblit following before they disappeared through the thicket of trees.

“Do you think the Tea House is still standing?” Eren asked, “Maybe we can hide there?”

“Unless Trost is done being rebuilt, I doubt it,” She pulled her cloak tighter, gently shrugging Levi’s hand off her elbow, “Besides, that would be one of the first places they’d look for us. I think we should just hang low. We can camp out under one of the bridges or something.”

“We should get moving,” Levi narrowed his gaze at the torches in the distance, wandering in and out of the cabin. “It’s only a matter of time before they decide to search the surrounding area.”

*

Despite being Faye’s home for a decade, the streets of Trost bared no familiarity. The cobblestone pathways had once been lined with children shouting to one another, grinning and laughing as they chased one another. The vendors would wave their targets over, haggling over prices and making deals with their consumers.

Instead, everything that had once held life contained little more than the embers of what had once been.

“Hey,” Faye glanced up at Alexander as she spoke, nudging him gently. He made no move to look her in the eyes, though she couldn’t blame the boy. He was probably still reeling with feelings of abandonment. “You doing alright? I know this doesn’t exactly look like the home you remember, but—”

“It’s fine.” His fists tightened, “I should get used to the sight for when we defect from the Scouts.”

Faye stumbled in her steps, head snapping up to watch Alexander with wide eyes. For a moment, her heart stopped, skin chilling under the heavy cloak she wore.

“We?” The captain whispered. The hope blooming in her chest clung tightly to her voice. “Does this mean you’re not angry with me anymore?”

“It means I’m willing to tolerate and listen to you,” Alexander said the words slowly, tasting the bitter reality that inevitably brought with them. “If I’m going to forgive you, I want the whole story. I’ve been your best friend for the last ten years, and I think it’s about time I get to know the lady I’ve grown so close to, don’t you?”

The wind howled next to Faye’s ear, pushing against her hood so quick and furiously that the fabric slid from her head, revealing the pensive frown she wore. Downcasted eyes and furrowed brows weren’t exactly the response Al’ had been hoping for, and yet, he couldn’t find it in himself to be surprised.

“I don’t think I can tell you everything yet.”

Maybe that was a truth even more bitter than his.

“But I’m willing to give you bits and pieces. Just until we hit Shiganshina.”

“Why?” Al’ murmured, “What’s going to change in Shiganshina? Does this have anything to do with your dad’s basem*nt and Eren’s key?” His head kept jumping from one conclusion to the next, but none of them made any sense. “And what about your mom? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk about her.”

“She’s dead.” Faye forced her lungs to shrivel as the air escaped her mouth. “For a while, I wasn’t sure, but I witnessed her death.”

“You—” Alexander choked on oxygen as he breathed in too quick. “You watched your own mother die, and you didn’t report it?!” His eyes were wider than saucers, jaw slack and mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. “Are you insane? It’s bad enough you already have a bad reputation with the MPs, but if they find out about this, you’re going to get executed. And this time, you won’t have Uncle Orwell to save your ass.”

Faye opened her lips to stop the spiral that was inevitably on its way, but she was too late in cutting down any false ideas festering inside of Alexander’s mind.

“f*ck, aren’t you technically on probation? Is that even what that word means? I mean, you’re under Commander Erwin’s supervision and authority, but since the Military Police are monitoring him, does that mean you’re free game? Commander Dok mentioned you in Stohess… What if—what if he’s out to get you, Faye? What if he finally gets to execute you? Beef nearly went into a depression when you disappeared. How the hell is he going to cope if you’re gone permanently?”

Alexander spun on his heel to face Faye, face sallow and fingers trembling as he gripped onto her shoulders, shaking her as if that would help get his point across.

“He’s still just a kitten, Faye. He needs a responsible adult—”

“Alexander,” Faye took in a shaky breath, blinking the hotness in her eyes away. The boy had gone still, but the weight of his hands on her shoulders made her knees buckle. “I need you to let go of me and take a step back, please.”

The Scout Captain’s shoulders were left cold without the heat from Alexander’s palms resting on them, though she couldn’t find it in herself to be regretful over asking him to distance himself. She wasn’t ready for that much physical contact yet, especially not after Zeke.

“Listen, Al’,” In went the oxygen, inflating her lungs once again. “Things are going to change in Shiganshina. There are going to be secrets that might put the Scouts in a very dangerous position—especially with the government that’s in charge.” Being blunt about the situation was easier said than done, and traversing the tightrope of truth and damnation was adding to her stress. “When it all comes out, you should resign from the Scouts and live as normal a life as possible.”

Alexander froze, eyes widening and fists tightening. For a heartbeat, he didn’t say anything, merely watched Faye as he processed her words. The seconds all melted together, neither being able to tell just how much time drowned in silence.

“We.” He mumbled. “When it all comes out, we will resign together and live a normal life.”

“Oi,” Levi’s terse tone cut through whatever heartfelt moment the captain and her lieutenant shared. “Ral, move closer to Springer. He looks ready to sh*t his pants.”

“sh*tty this, sh*tty that, does Captain Levi ever describe anything as something other than sh*tty?” Al muttered under his breath, shuffling up ahead of the two captains. “Learn a better vocabulary to make better— f*ck!”

Faye had only blinked, and that was all the time it took for Alexander to take a nose-dive towards the walkway. If he hadn’t brought his hands up to shield his face, the soldier would likely have suffered scrapes along his forehead and chin.

“Stop your sh*tty whining, brat,” Levi stood overtop, leg still extended from where he had literally kicked his soldier down. “You’re part of the Scouts, so start acting like it.”

“Maybe I’ll start acting like it when my superiors start—”

“Okay, Alexander,” Faye stepped forward, gently tugging Levi to take a step back from her lieutenant. “Stop talking before you land yourself another thrashing. You never saw what Levi did to Eren at his court hearing.” Her eyes held urgency despite the exasperation in her voice. “Go make sure Connie is okay and ask him to bandage your hands.”

When the sound of Alexander’s footsteps faded off, Faye let out the breath she was holding and pinned Levi with a stern frown. Her arms crossed, and for a second, Humanity’s Strongest could have sworn he’d seen that exact pose from another lifetime. His mind nearly throbbed from how far back his memories receded, and the distorted image of his mother faded in and out of focus.

“If you want Al’ to follow orders, you might want to try being a little more friendly.”

And just as quick as the memories washed over him, did they recede into the ocean within the scope of Levi’s brain.

“You’re babying him. He’s a soldier, and he acts like he’s still in sh*t-crusted diapers.” Levi couldn’t help but scoff, rolling his eyes in his usual, irritated manner. “Ral is the liability on our squad, and he’s the most likely to die on an expedition. He might not realize it, but you and I do.” His fingers brushed over Faye’s hood, pulling it back in place as they continued forward. “Unless you want to see that statistic become a reality, one of us needs to step up to the plate, and I don’t see your ass doing it.”

“You’re forgetting that a month and a half ago, Alexander could barely bandage a cut,” Faye defended, “He’s doing his best, but not everyone shares your aptitude to slaying titans. You and Erwin insisted we learn how to use the ODM gear before the expedition, and, well, he can’t stick his landings very well, but he’s on the right track.”

“Faye,” Levi tugged on her elbow, willing her to turn and face him under the moonlight. “This isn’t some sh*tty game. If Ral can’t fight, he has no business being on our ragtag squad.” His voice lowered dangerously, grip tightening by a fraction. “The Military Police are hunting us, and if your sh*tty f*cking lieutenant can’t defend himself, he’ll be dead faster than either of us can prevent it.”

For a long heartbeat, neither captain broke their silence and opted to stare obstinately at the other. Trost might have been a generally lively town, but in that instance, not even the grasshoppers dared to encroach in the argument.

“Damit,” Faye’s knuckles went white by how hard her hands tightened around thin air. She hated to admit Levi was right about Alexander, but she would never forgive herself if she turned a blind eye to the obvious. “So, what the hell am I supposed to do to fix this?”

“We’ll start on their training tonight,” Levi let out a tired sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose while he thought. “You can teach half of the brats how to use a gun, and I’ll take the other half.”

“None of those kids are going to be ready to kill.” It was a quiet admittance that Faye would rather have never needed to worry about, but in these circ*mstances, it couldn’t be ignored. “If one of them freezes up in front of a seasoned MP, they’re not going to make it.”

“So, what did you do when you were a kid?”

The ground beneath Faye swayed as her world tilted on its axis. She found her lungs caving in, momentarily forgetting how to breathe. Did he— did he just ask her about her childhood?

“It was different,” She tried to insist. Somehow, despite the question being one of the absolute last topics Faye ever wanted to discuss, she couldn’t find it in herself to be entirely untruthful. “Right from day one, I was taught that the only way to win was to shoot before the enemy. There was no other option, and I was expected to adapt.”

“So make them realize that.”

“They’re just kids,” Faye breathed, heart pulsating. “They shouldn’t have to learn how to shoot a gun, or take another person’s life, or—”

“Faye,” Levi cut in, gently tugging on her elbow. “They’re Scouts. They have no choice.”

“I know,” Her lips tugged down into a sullen frown, “I understand that they signed up for this of their own free will. I just wish they hadn’t.” It was selfish; she knew it was. “Even when Eren was a kid, he’d mention joining the scouts, and I just… I couldn’t understand it. Being a hero isn’t glamorous. It’s a path forged in an abyss of blood and chaos, and no one seems to understand that. He’s either going to die a violent death or a meaningless one. Or worse, both. ”

“Stop sh*tting your pants,” Humanity’s Strongest strode forward with Faye in tow. “You’re focusing too much on the future. Let’s figure out how we’re going to get through this mess with the Military Police first.”

“Yeah,” Her insides felt chilly, heart lessening its assault on her ribcage. “You’re right. You take Eren, Historia, Armin and Al’; they’re lacking in physical strength and technique. I’ll take the rest and start on their sharpshooting skills.”

“You sure you’re feeling good enough for that?” He couldn’t help but let his eyes linger on her chest where her ribs should have been. “Your ribs aren’t finished healing, and you’re not back to 100%.”

“Speak for yourself,” Faye snorted, rolling her eyes. “It hasn’t even been a full month since your run-in with the Female Titan. Awfully ironic for you to try and tell me to rest.”

Levi’s lips twitched, hidden beneath the cover of his cloak and lack of sunlight. He let out a soft breath of air that looked an awful lot like a laugh, eyes lightening as he glanced up at the moon. If Faye were making a witty comeback, maybe she really was feeling better, after all.

*

The moon hung high in the abyss of black, overseeing the cloaked figure as they treaded over piles of rubble and cobblestone. The night had long since turned chilly, leaving frost to nip at the ground and deaden the grass. Whatever citizens of Trost that had once roamed the streets had retired for the night, wary of the petty theft that had recently thrived thanks to the sh*tty economy — or lack thereof.

He heard her before he saw her, and he readied himself. His feet worked quickly, making sure to round the corner sharply and swiftly. His senses knew no other life than being that of a predator, and hunt he did that night.

“Oi oi oi,” He felt her knock into him, stumbling. “Watch where you’re going.” His acting skills were unmatched, even as he shifted to sidle against the wall, intending to let her through.

“Kenny?” Faye squinted through the darkness, ears ringing in recognition. “What are you doing back in Trost?” Her heart pulsated, thumping wildly in her chest. Her fingers curled around the strap of her gun, wary of the serial killer who peeked out from the shadows.

“Can’t an old man visit his stomping grounds?” His canines ominously glinted as he stepped forward where the light from the moon barely stretched. “I’m in between jobs, and I was kinda hopin’ to find a bar to relax in.”

“You don’t have a job,” She deadpanned, knitting her brows together.

“I’m sure a lot of dead MPs would beg to differ,” Kenny shrugged, languidly continuing forward. “I was a devoted man, still am. There’s nothing quite like a fresh kill to bask in, so if you’ll excuse me.” His trenchcoat swayed behind him as he shoved his hands in her pockets, tipping his hat as he passed Faye.

“That’s it?” Something about the encounter felt off, like an itch at the back of her brain that she couldn’t get rid of. “No more snarly comments or asking how I’ve been? No asking about how I ended up in the hospital?”

“None of my business.”

“I thought you said we wouldn’t have a problem as long as I stayed out of trouble,” She called. For a heartbeat, Kenny paused, and she held her breath, waiting for him to do something. Her gun felt lighter than ever, and she mentally prepared herself to swing the barrel forward, take aim, and shoot at the man.

“Oi,” It came out softly, getting lost in the breeze. “The list of runts I don’t want to kill is short, but your name places in the top three.”

“Wow, I’m touched,” The words came out in a sarcastic drawl.

“Oi, I visited you in the hospital, you little sh*t. You should be,” Kenny growled, face darkening. “That whole building was under surveillance, and I could barely walk three steps down a hallway without catching sight of a Scout. Not to mention you had all your sh*tty little friends sitting at your bedside during the day. It wasn’t easy sneaking in.”

“You—” Amusem*nt fluttered along Faye’s expression, dancing in her eyes and twitching her lips up. “You snuck in just to see me?” It sounded so absurd, and she bit back the urge to laugh. “Wow, I never imagined Kenny the Ripper would go soft enough to visit someone in the hospital.”

“Keep talking like that, and I’ll be putting you right back into one.” His eyes never left hers, allowing a heartbeat to pass by without exchanging words. “Who put you into the hospital in the first place?”

“You’re good, Kenny,” Faye sighed. “But not that good. He’s untouchable, even for you. So just drop it.”

“Was it that little sh*t everyone’s talkin’ about? Humanity’s Strongest?” His hands tightened into fists, lips thinning out of stress. If Faye didn’t know any better, she would have assumed he was almost… worried about her answer?

“No,” She furrowed her brows, appalled at the thought. “Levi would never intentionally hurt me like that. He’s grumpy, and he gets irritated really easily, but he’s not the type to take his anger out on someone else.” She searched his gaze, trying to piece together what the serial killer was thinking.

His shoulders eased, lips pushing out a short breath. It was an action so minuscule, Faye nearly thought she had imagined it.

“You shouldn’t be walking the streets this late at night,” He grunted, glancing at the dilapidated buildings behind her. “Lots of sh*ts that prowl the streets lookin’ for their next victim.”

“I’ll be fine,” Faye shrugged, “I’ve lived here for more than a decade, whatever thieves and wannabe criminals there are, I can handle.” And she meant it. The gun strapped to her chest only needed a finger to push the trigger, and she was faster at that than anyone else she knew.

For a long time, it was all she knew.

“Hey Faye,” It all happened within a heartbeat that lasted an eternity. His eyes met hers in a moment of vulnerability, peeling back the guarded layers of both their souls. Neither could hide their sins stained in the blood of innocents. “Don’t let your guard down in Trost.”

He didn’t wait for a response of acknowledgment, and his feet carried forward, leaving Faye to mull over his words.

Of all things, Kenny had always been the one to simultaneously make the most and least sense to her. She could vaguely understand his personality, but his actions continued to confuse her to no end.

“Whatever, you weird old man,” She scowled, turning her back on the fading trenchcoat. “Be cryptic and pointless all you want, but you’re not getting stuck in my head tonight. I’ve got bigger bears to roast.”

The streets themselves were littered with sharp, jagged rocks that threatened to cut into her sandals, and a few alleyways she managed to stumble upon had been caved in with giant boulders and wooden beams. Every once in a while, she would pass by an old building that had been obliterated by titans back when Trost had been breached. For the most part, though, the pathways hadn’t changed much.

And she marched forward, intent on coming full circle.

Faye kneeled down on top of a few wooden frames, eyes softening as her hands touched the cool stone. The brothel had been home to many women over the years, but none had been privy to the secrets between the walls as much as Bertha Bauer. The very same Bertha Bauer who had kept Faye’s under-the-table hospital a secret, which had been what ultimately led to her death.

“It stinks like piss here.”

“Levi!” Faye whispered, bringing a hand to her chest to steady her heartbeat. “It’s almost midnight. What are you still doing up?” Her ribcage would have throbbed if it weren’t for the number of painkillers Faye had taken an hour prior.

“I could ask you the same thing,” Levi narrowed his gaze, shoulders straightening out. “Braus said you disappeared after their training session. Is this where you’ve been for the last three hours?” He couldn’t hide the disapproval from his tone, and the moonlight glistened off his eyes, leaving him with a calm aura.

“No,” Faye forced her lips to curve, though the smile didn’t reach her eyes quite right. “I was just going down my old route from when I made deliveries and house calls. I haven’t been back to Trost since it fell, and I guess the nostalgia hit me harder than I expected.” She shuffled down to a lower beam, hiding her grunt behind a cough. “This used to be—”

“The sh*tty brothel you made us chase you through,” Levi cut in, holding a hand out to help her down the rubble safely. “The stench in there was the only thing that gave you an advantage over me. Mike nearly sh*t himself laughing.”

“Really?”

“No.”

The hope which bloomed in Faye’s chest evaporated within the second, and she was left feeling cold.

“I miss Mike,” Faye sighed, hopping off the last of the rubble. “I keep replaying his death in my head, and—well— he didn’t go quietly into the night.” The screams reverberated inside her skull, then came the sickening crunch of his spinal cord—

“Faye, snap out of your sh*tty delusions. He went out the way most Scouts do, and Nanaba wasn’t far behind.” Levi should have let go of her hand, and yet, he only squeezed it gently to comfort her. “The Scouts only retire in death, and knowing Mike, he went out swinging.”

She hummed, giving a slight nod as she swallowed the guilt back down. “Come on; I’ll show you where I met Mike for the first time.” Her hand left Levi’s, and she couldn’t help the frown at the hyperawareness she felt at the loss of warmth she gained from her fellow captain’s gesture. “It was raining, and Bertha had saved my ass from one of the MPs who stuck his self-righteous nose into our business.”

Levi’s lips twitched as he followed close behind. The little jabs at how useless the Military Police were was a good sign.

“I was going down this alleyway because it was a shortcut back to my shop,” She could practically envision herself teetering back from the brothel, envelope in hand, as she frowned. “Bertha overpaid me, and I remember I was grumbling to myself. I must have been really annoyed, because, well, I wasn’t paying attention to where I was walking, and I landed face-first on the ground.”

“Mike mentioned that. Said you froze up when you saw him before you helped him back to the shop.” Levi mumbled, flitting his eyes to where Faye had stopped to stare. “He told us about how some idiot who was practicing medicine without a license saved his life.”

“He was so bloody, Levi,” She shuttered in a breath, “And I couldn’t do anything. Why couldn’t I save his life when I had done it twice before?”

“You can’t save every soul you meet,” He had gone rigid, voice going gruff. This was a lot more vulnerable than he had anticipated getting for the night. He needed to mentally prepare himself if Faye were going to go soft on him. He needed time to think about appropriate responses that wouldn’t paint him as an asshole. “Mike didn’t die just so you could kill yourself over all the guilt.”

“You’re right,” Again, she forced herself to give a small smile, eyes blurring over if only slightly, hidden beneath the veil of darkness cast by night. “I guess that’s my fatal flaw. Feeling too guilty over everything.”

Faye waited for Levi to say something, maybe reprimand her for saying something dumb or too self-absorbed, but all he did was watch her through the moonlight, taking in the sight of her vulnerability. He seemed closer than she could ever recall being, standing a hair away from her.

“Come on,” She stepped away, stomach fluttering. “We’ve got one last stop to complete my route, and then we can get back to the squad.”

She led the way down the dingy alleyway. Most of it had been caved in thanks to debris, though the pair climbed overtop it all regardless. Mice skittered close to the cracks, squeaking as the captains strode by. Their beady eyes followed the determined movement, sniffing the air as they continued on their way.

Just as Faye had remembered, her home was little more than chunks of wood and rocks. Glass crunched beneath their feet, and the old wooden sign that had once read “The Tea House” in thick white paint had been snapped in half, splintering at the ends and going mouldy. The banner Faye had hung up peeked between two beams, shredded and too far gone to be saved.

“Still smells like tea here,” Levi noted, surveying the area. “You think you might be able to recover some when they finally get around to fixing this sh*t up?”

“It’ll probably have gone bad by then.” Faye carefully mounted some of the debris, climbing up and throwing the lighter pieces off the pile. “I think—” She grunted, pulling a heavier board away, “That I want to reopen the shop once I finish with the Scouts.” If I ever finish with the Scouts.

“You think Erwin is going to let you slip through his fat fingers after all the effort he put into obtaining you?” He raised a brow, crossing his arms as he supervised Faye. “I think he’d rather give up on Shiganshina before he lets you off the hook.”

“I know,” She shuffled around more rocks, finally creating a dent in the wreckage. “But a girl can dream. Who knows, maybe you and Erwin will retire with me, and we’ll open a sister shop to this one in Mitras or something.”

“Yeah, right,” Levi snorted. “Erwin in a sh*tty tea shop? He’d charm every woman within a 30-mile radius and accidentally drop boiling water on himself. The f*cker can’t even make decent herbal tea. And herbal tea isn’t even—”

“Isn’t even real tea,” Faye finished, lips twitching up. “I know, I know. You’ve told me your opinion on this before.” She didn’t even need to glance back to know Levi was rolling his eyes and scoffing. “You make it sound like Erwin is incompetent or something. I figured he was good at everything; a jack of all trades.”

“He’s sh*t out of luck when it comes to making anything edible.” He squinted at Faye, scowling in impatience. “What the hell are you doing? I thought you wanted to go for some kind of crappy ‘stroll down memory lane,’ not shove a bunch of sh*tty rocks back and forth to dig your way back into your shop.”

“Well,” She felt her ribs involuntarily throb as she moved a heavier beam. “I wanted to lay my mom’s ring to rest here. I don’t think I want it anymore.” She grunted, arms buckling under the weight of another borderline boulder. “It’s been weighing me down ever since I woke up.”

“Does this have something to do with what happened when the Beast Titan kidnapped you?”

Faye finally stopped her struggle to dig a hole into the remains of her shop, spine going rigid. Levi was asking all the right questions, and she was getting too comfortable lying or avoiding answering.

“My dad’s wedding band is buried somewhere in this mess, too,” It was nearly quiet enough to get lost in the wind. “I just think they would be happy to finally be reunited. That’s all.”

“You mean because they’re both dead?”

“How did you figure that out?” She didn’t pause, though her throat had gone tight, chest caving in. She nearly jumped out of her skin when he placed a hand on her head, kneeling down next to her to help clear some space out.

“Erwin figured it out,” He nudged Faye’s hand away, wordlessly ordering her to take a break. “Said you cried out for your mother when the titans started attacking one of their own. After sh*tty-Glasses and Springer mentioned their theory on titans being human, the brainy bastard started to put all the pieces together.”

“And I only furthered his conviction when I confirmed Hange and Connie’s theory,” Her voice felt disembodied, having receded into her thoughts. “Why didn’t either of you ask me about this sooner?”

“None of our—” He froze in his endeavour, furrowing his brows at the peeking out between some broken glass. His fingers nimbly pinched around it, and he subconsciously tilted his head in raw wonder. “Oi, Faye. This what you were looking for?”

“What are the chances..?” Faye’s lips gaped open, eyes trained on the golden wedding band from her childhood. Numbly, she held out her hand, blinking at the coolness of it when Levi dropped the metal onto her palm. “Here,” She slipped a hand into her pocket and fished out Dina’s engagement ring. “Let’s lay them both to rest for the last time.”

“You should hold onto them. Most people get sentimental over sh*t like this,” Levi dryly stated, uncooperative in Faye’s attempts to hand the rings back.

“I don’t want it anymore,” Faye tried to say, shaking her head. Her mind kept flashing back to Zeke and how insistent he was to put their mother’s ring on her finger. “I think we should leave them and—”

“Faye,” Levi interjected, creasing his forehead. It was one of those rare times he let his guard down, and his defenselessness peeked out. “Don’t lie to me. You can lie to Ral, or Eren, or even Erwin. But don’t do that sh*t to me.” He refused to break the eye contact, leaning in just a hair closer.

“If I tell you, you’re going to look at me differently,” She whispered, stomach tying itself into knots. “I just want myself to feel normal again, and not on high alert every time I hear a twig snap or feel like I need to vomit anytime I smell cigarettes.”

“He raped you.”

The air went still, freeing Faye from the inside out. Her hands went clammy, heart palpitating as her eyes widened. She swallowed thickly, nausea brewing in the pit of her stomach. She opened her mouth once, twice, three times, but her tongue forgot how to formulate words, and her mind couldn’t string together more than two coherent sentences together.

“I threatened the doctor, and he nearly pissed himself trying to give me a status update on your health.” Levi knew better than to allow to quiet rage to burn its way past his throat, and he settled on flexing his fingers to direct his — well, if he were being honest, he couldn’t quite discern his feelings on it. It was like some mixture from hell of anger and restlessness. “I wanted to wait for you to come clean, but I’m realizing now that you would rather sh*t yourself than put yourself in a vulnerable situation.”

“I—”

“Don’t want to talk about it,” Levi finished. “You take shorter sh*ts than the rest of them, so I guess it’s fine.”

“Levi…” Faye mumbled, wetting her lips as she tried to think of a response. “Thank you.” The words were dismal, but it was the only sentence she could string together and understand.

“I’ll hold onto the rings for now. You’ll get yourself killed if you keep thinking about those hunks of metal being lost.” He didn’t look, merely held his hand out and stared at the open alleyway, choosing to give Faye a sliver of privacy. She deserved that much.

“Yeah,” Faye hummed, nodding solemnly. Her hand went heavy, weighed down with the burden of memories ingrained in the metal. “You’re probably right. Can’t have me die before Shiganshina. Erwin would bring me back to life and lecture me.”

Air shot through Levi’s nose, fingers clasping around the rings. “He’d have to take a sh*t bigger than his thighs if you died before you told him anything. He’s barely restraining himself now.” Carefully, he tucked both rings away in his pocket, making a mental note to find some twine for them.

“His thighs really are kind of… Muscular,” She mumbled. “How many days a week do you think he works on his legs?”

“Well, he’ll definitely have more time for them now since he only has one arm left to focus on.”

Faye blinked, skull going empty. “Did you just—”

“Don’t strain yourself trying to put that together,” Levi got to his feet, offering Faye a hand.

The silence dragged on between the pair as they drudged back. It settled into the atmosphere seamlessly, and neither captain minded keeping their thoughts tucked away inside their heads. Faye fiddled with the strap of her rifle, and Levi straightened his shoulders, letting his fingers fall leaden with the weight of the rings inside his pocket.

*

Faye’s eyes narrowed at the teenager in front of her, fixing the skirt he wore. It was a little unsettling how similar the two teenagers resembled each other with their sunny blond hair and bright blue eyes. Sure, Armin was a little taller than Historia, and his nose was more rounded and freckled, but if you squinted from a distance, the two were identical.

“Okay,” Al’ clapped, stepping away from his work to survey Armin’s hair. “That should do it. You’re all set to walk the streets as Historia Reiss now.”

“Not quite,” She offered Armin a hand, helping him to stand on wobbly knees. “You’ve got the look of Historia down, but take a look at her,” She nudged her chin down the alleyway where Levi was offering instructions to her and Eren. “You’re shaking in your own skin, and you can barely walk or talk. That’s not going to fly too well when you’re out on the field.”

“Captain Faye,” Jean’s head tilted as he stepped forward, lips tugging down. “With all due respect, I hardly think that’s needed. We only need to fool the Military Police for a few hours at the most.”

“Do you know what I used to do for a living?” She made sure to maintain eye contact, staring at her own face reflected in the hue of Jean’s eyes. “I ran an out-of-pocket hospital that attracted the attention of criminals, who then became important clientele. I did that for a decade, Jean.” She didn’t let her voice waver, and the sight of Jean uncomfortably shifting caught on her senses. “No one knows about outsmarting the Military Police better than me — Al’, you don’t count because you never made any executive decisions when it came to hiding things or keeping it a secret.” She could already hear the ginger protesting, and it was in her best interest to maintain the gaze of all three soldiers. “There aren’t shortcuts you can take when it comes to evading the law. The second you decide to get sloppy or cut corners is the second you sign your death certificate.” Faye searched for recognition in Jean’s eyes, flitting back forth between them before she attentively asked, “Do you understand?”

“Yeah,” His adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, hands going clammy.

“Alright, Armin,” Faye stepped out of the way, offering him some room. “Let’s see the walk.”

And off he went like a spooked deer, legs struggling to take long strides and shoulders hunched in on themselves. It looked awkward and inhuman with the way he drudged from leg to leg, and Faye couldn’t help but grimace at how god-awful Armin was at imitating Historia.

“How was that?” The blond’s eyes flitted between Faye, Alexander, and Jean, brimming with hope.

“Well,” Time to be brutally honest. “Let’s start with your legs; you’re trying to take too long of a step. Historia is shorter than you and I, which means that her strides are going to be a little shorter.”

Levi came to stand next to Alexander, training his vision on Faye and how she took a few steps as she explained something about the weight of her hip. Again, his fingers found the rings inside his pocket, and his brows furrowed. She was acting like she was fine, but the thought of her trying to get rid of her mother’s ring burned at the back of his brain, begging him to figure out the mystery and assemble the pieces of the puzzle.

“Alright, good,” She adjusted his shoulders to sit just slightly farther back than typical and raised his chin as he walked. “Remember that Historia is nobility. She might not have been raised as such, but it’s ingrained in the way she goes about her day-to-day life. Think big, bigger than the colossal, bigger than life itself.”

“But—” Armin’s eyes widened, tone raising a few octaves as he struggled to gather his thoughts.

“No buts. That’s how it is.” Faye cut in. “Now, take it again from the top. Imagine you’re the king, and you’re the one who rules the walls.”

She backed away slowly, training her inspection on the boy’s posture. If she blurred her vision and made Historia and Armin walk side by side, she would never be able to tell the difference between the two.

“Hey, Faye,” Alexander whispered, leaning down to maintain the semblance of privacy. “How do you know so much about this?”

“I’ve been acting like someone else most of my life,” She mumbled back, flitting her attention to her best friend. “You can tell a lot about people by the way they walk. No one can hide the way they were brought up, whether it be in micro-expressions or footfalls. If you live with someone for long enough, you’ll subconsciously memorize the sound of their footfalls and how long their paces are. For example, you sound heavier than you are, and when you’re nervous, you take shorter steps.”

“Did you just call me fat?”

“Yes.”

Alexander whipped around to gawk at Levi, who stood relaxed and unfazed with his soldier’s dramatic reaction.

“You look like you haven’t sh*t in weeks, Ral. Maybe Faye can prescribe some—”

“Maybe Faye shouldn’t have to listen to the two of you bicker,” The medic cut in with a thinned lip and stern glare. “Honestly. The both of you act like two kids who don’t know how to share. Levi, stop poking holes at Alexander, and Al’, stop imagining ways to kill Levi; it’s not going to happen, and you’ll end up with a broken leg.”

“I need to speak with you,” Levi ignored her and instead slid his eyes over to glance at Alexander, who was listening with his undivided attention. “Privately.”

“Yeah,” She gave a nod, “Al’, try and show Jean how to act less...” She pinched her brows together and pursed her lips, “Horselike.” She waved her hand vaguely. “He’s got to act more like a scrawny teenager who cares more about titans than girls.”

“Aye aye, Captain.” Alexander watched Faye be led away by the elbow, though his breath got caught in his throat when he caught sight of her steps. They weren’t short or reluctant, but long and graceful. He darted his eyes between Armin and his captain, frowning.

It was almost the exact same walk.

“If our plan gets thrown out the window, I need to know you won’t panic or overreact,” Levi spoke slowly, trying to gauge Faye’s emotions. “I get that Eren is your brother, but if you can’t think straight—”

“Levi,” Faye cut in. “I’ll be fine. Out of everyone on this team, you and I are the most level-headed and experienced when it comes to dealing with the Military Police. If I can’t handle the stress of the job, I don’t deserve to be here. He’s not my brother. He’s my subordinate when I’m on duty.”

“Yeah, well,” Levi glanced back at their team, lips thinning. “Screw being on duty. I don’t intend on letting any of my soldiers lose their lives again. If one of them gets kidnapped, we’re not leaving them to be fodder for the government’s corruption.”

Surprise flashed in her eyes, lips gaping open. “Yeah,” She murmured back. “No man left behind, right?”

“Let’s get moving. It’s almost sun up, and the longer we dawdle, the longer the MPs have to try and track our movements.” He was brusque, not pausing again to reassure her or offer any words of encouragement. She didn’t need them.

“I’ll take the roofs with Nifa. You keep an eye on Armin and Jean with Mikasa.” It was only a suggestion, but Levi nodded, taking it for what it was: a good plan of action.

“Get a head start with the team. I’ll meet up with you once things have been taken care of.”

That was all the motivation Faye needed to spin on her heel and holler out, “Mikasa, Jean, and Armin, walk with Levi. The rest of you are with me.” She just kept striding forward, head held high as she pulled her hood up.

“Captain?” Connie mumbled, “What are our orders?” He wiped the sweat from his palms on his cloak, teetering from foot to foot anxiously as he scrambled forward.

“Watch the cart and keep your eyes open for any suspicious movement or MPs stalking around. Our goal is to lay low and keep the attention off of us. That means keep the practical jokes to a minimum.”

“Um,” His tongue twisted awkwardly, “How—why is Sasha the only one with a rifle?”

“We only had one, Connie,” Faye nudged her head to Eren and Historia, signalling for them to get into position. “And the rest of you can’t take aim and shoot. Why would I let someone who can’t line a bullet up properly handle a gun? You’ll waste bullets.”

“But—”

“Connie, you, Sasha and Al’ can follow on foot, but I need you all to be hyperaware of your surroundings. If anything backfires, you need to be alert and prepared. These aren’t titans that work on instincts. These are humans whose intelligence will get you killed if you aren’t paying enough attention.”

“Captain Faye,” Sasha stuttered over the name, “What if we can’t—well— you know. Kill another human?”

The captain stilled, face falling into an indescribable display. It was lost somewhere between her duty and humanity, being pulled by both ends in an endless game of tug of war.

“Try not to look them in the eyes.”

Chapter 27: 22. Kidnapped! Faye and Alexander's Realizations

Chapter Text

The air thrummed around Faye as she trained her eyes on the wagon, frowning. Eren and Historia were presumably sitting inside, likely silent and fraying their nerves with anxiety. She could understand herself and Eren being targeted by the MPs, but Historia? Something didn’t add up.

The sound of hooks grappling towards her broke Faye’s concentration, and less than a heartbeat later, Levi kneeled next to Faye, sidling along the chimney and letting his shoulder bump into hers.

“Hey,” Faye kept her voice low, “What do we know about Historia other than her family was of noble descent?”

Levi let his lips tug down; the lines under his eyes deepened as he clenched his jaw. “Nothing.” Then, as though Faye’s question hadn’t been any concern of his, he turned to Nifa. “Status report?”

“Captain Levi,” Nifa greeted, only sparing a moment to glance at Humanity’s Strongest. “The road is crowded, but I’ve seen nothing unusual. It’s not far to Commander Pyxis’ from here, so I think we’ll pull through. How is the body-double mission?”

“A success.”

“You don’t sound too pleased,” Faye noted, lips turning down. “What’s wrong?”

Levi flitted his eyes to meet Faye’s, leaning his shoulder into hers. He could feel his own body warmth being sapped away by Faye, letting her relax. He frowned. Of course, Levi had expected Faye to be on high alert, but he couldn’t recall a time she had ever been so stiff. Perhaps she had noticed the same thing he had.

“Captains,” Nifa leaned over the arch of the roof. “The wagon is almost on the move again.”

“Faye,” He avoided eye contact, staring down at the wagons. “You’ve worked with Kenny the Ripper, haven’t you?”

“The mass murderer in the capital?” Nifa’s brows furrowed in confusion, “The one who slit the throats of over a hundred MPs? I thought he was just an urban legend.” Her shoulders tensed, and she stared expectantly at Faye. “There were rumours you helped criminals before you joined the Scouts, but Kenny the Ripper?”

Faye hummed, nodding. “He’s killed well over a hundred people,” Her skin raised, the hair at the nape of her neck standing on edge. “Probably closer to five hundred people if the drugs I gave him were used in tandem. What about him?”

“He’s no legend,” Bitter resentment strangled his voice. “I lived with him. Back when I was a kid.”

Faye’s spine went rigid, fingertips going numb. Her ears rang, sending the wails of all his victims to echo within her skull. Of all the people Levi could have lived with, it just had to be the very same serial killer she had made a connection with. But then—

“Yeah, very funny, sir,” Nifa sent out a nervous laugh. “This isn’t really the time to be making jokes.”

“Levi,” She fought to keep her breaths of air even and steady, forcing her heart not to take off faster than a titan could run. “He’s in Trost. I ran into him last night.” Panicking would only worsen the situation, and the last thing Faye needed was to let her anxiety cloud her mind. “Levi, he’s in Trost—”

“Nifa!” Faye’s voice fused with Levi’s as they both screamed for their subordinate, eyes catching on the shadow of a tall figure with a wide-brimmed hat and predatory grin pulling the trigger and sending a bullet straight through Nifa’s throat.

Faye and Levi pulled themselves over the rooftop, taking refuge behind the wide chimney.

“sh*t. sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t.” Faye was already working to down another few painkillers, unenthused with their predicament. “One of us needs to take him, and the other needs to get to Eren and Historia.”

“Long time, Levi. Still a runt, or have you grown some?”

“I’ll take him,” Levi breathed, shoulders tensing. “You get to the kids and make sure they’re safe.”

“Levi,” She whispered. “If I had the ring on me, now would have been a perfect moment to give it to you.

ODM hooks grappled into the tiled roof, propelling Kenny forward. The bastard was agile despite his old age, and Faye had to curse him under her breath as she readied herself, eyes catching on the two handguns aimed at her and Levi.

“KENNY!”

Faye pounced off the roof as Levi swept his cloak off to provide a veil between them. No words were further communicated between the two captains, and Faye thumbed the button at her hip to pull her through the open air with only the silent agreement that they both make it back alive.

The gear dug into her skin mercilessly as she rounded a corner, and just as her gaze locked with Eren, where he sat tucked away on the wagon, did three MPs round the corner, blocking the direct pathway to her little brother.

It was all instinctual, really. The logistics of Faye shooting all seven of them were low, but one? One she could definitely take down and discard the rest at her own leisure. Her arms worked on muscle memory, bringing the gun forward as she traversed the open air, and just like she had done hundreds of times before, she pulled the trigger, sending one of the men to the ground with a bullet in his head.

Her ODM gear whizzed and whirled as she changed directions, glancing over at Levi, who had already taken to an alleyway with three men tailing his ass.

Don’t let your guard down in Trost.

Kenny’s words reverberated over and over again, mocking her as she let her body go on autopilot. The bastard knew their plan from the get-go, and he never said anything. But then, if he had slit the throats of all those MPs, why the hell was he working with them? Nothing made any goddamn sense anymore.

Bullets rained down around Faye, iron set ablaze as they lodged into the ground and walls around her. It wasn’t a new sight, and Faye found herself mildly grateful for all her experience being thrown into the pits of war. She took a deep breath.

Faye bit back a growl, hand shoving into the little pocket inside her cloak. It only took half a heartbeat to fling the safety off her revolver and take aim, sending the metal through the air and into the soldier’s chest.

Again, she turned tail and took off down a small alley, using the wooden beams supporting the homes being rebuilt to take refuge from the onslaught of bullets. It was a wonder she was still standing, and even more so when she stopped to consider her ribs. It wasn’t like she hadn’t wrapped them a little extra tight, knowing she was going to be doing some heavy metaphorical lifting that day, but even so... It was going to hurt like a motherf*cker when the painkillers wore off.

Her legs moved instinctually, rounding the corner and diving headfirst into the first building she saw. Vaguely, she could hear the patrons whispering and staring at her with wide eyes, but her attention was trained on the only other soldier present.

“I thought I told you to keep Kenny busy?” Faye hissed, not missing the scowl and pursing of Levi’s lips as he flicked the blood out of his eyes. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Get behind the sh*tty bar before he blows a hole in you,” he glowered, hopping off the counter.

She would have hesitated, but the shouts from outside caught Faye’s attention, and her blood ran cold. If Levi had crammed himself into literally any other building, they wouldn’t run the risk of letting Kenny and the MPs kill two birds with one serial killer.

The medic let her frown sour as she followed suit, dropping down to huddle next to him while they waited.

“Oi,” Levi shoved yet another rifle into Faye’s hand, “How many followed you?” He wiped the blood from his eyes again, annoyance flitting across his face, though she couldn’t tell if it was because of how messy the blood was or because it was impairing his vision. Likely both.

“I had seven, but I took two out on my way here,” Two pissed-off captains didn’t make for terrific conversation, it seemed. “Put some balm on that while Kenny talks about his ego. It’ll help with all the blood.” She nudged her satchel in his direction, listening to the sound of her heart thundering in her ears.

“It’s the damndest thing,” Kenny drawled, taking big, unnecessarily loud steps. “I seem to be smellin’ a couple of rats in this fine establishment. Come on out, little rodents.” She held her breath, and before she could think to let it out, Kenny leaped through the swinging doors, making a ruckus for his own amusem*nt. “The sheriff is here, and I aim to exterminate all the vermin I can find. Bang! Bang!” He stomped on the ground as if to emphasize the pretend gunshots.

Faye and Levi, meanwhile, remained unimpressed, sharing a look caught somewhere between irritation and plain mortification at the serial killer’s embarrassing actions.

“Was he always this uncool?” Faye mumbled.

“Even worse when I was a kid.”

“Oh, come on!” Kenny baited, “You here, or not?”

“Right here, Kenny.” Levi eyed the gun, silently telling her to prepare herself to take aim and fire. “Been a while.” The silence between the bar patrons was maddening, and Faye found herself clinging to Levi’s voice to keep from acting prematurely. “I really thought you’d be dead by now, what with all the MPs you’ve been butchering. But now you’re great friends, huh?”

“Yeah, well, adults do plenty of things kids like you don’t understand,” The serial killer fired back. “Oh, right. My mistake. You’re supposed to be an adult now, but you’re still such a runt that it’s hard to tell.” He let out a small breath of air akin to a laugh. “Always hoped that I might get to see you in action someday. I can’t say I’m disappointed, either. Seems like you still remember every trick I taught ya. But didn’t I ever—”

“Are you sticking to that rat metaphor?” Faye cut in, rolling her eyes at the little grunt of exasperations she could vaguely hear behind the bar counter. “That’s getting a little old, don’t you think?”

“You’re here, too, you little brat?” Kenny didn’t sound too surprised. “Then you should remember this lesson, too. What did I tell you happens to a rat that gets cornered?”

“We’ll find a bullet waiting in every direction,” Faye dully recited.

“Oi, Levi,” Kenny hurled a chair into the wall of wine, smashing the bottles and causing shards of glass to explode out. “You must have become a Scout for a reason, and I think I know what that is.”

One glance at Levi was all it took for Faye to realize that her fellow captain was listening with rapt attention, fisting his hands so tight that his knuckles paled. If she looked closer, she could just make out the edge of his jaw tightening as he ground his teeth together. Kenny was getting under his skin.

Or maybe Faye was the salt being rubbed in his emotional wounds…

“We were forced to survive in that little hellhole,” The serial killer continued. “Giving everything we had just to stay alive. So when we found out just how big the world really was, you can bet it hurt like hell. But you know what saved us?” Faye could feel the floor vibrating as Kenny picked up another chair, voice lightening as if pleased with himself. “We found something we enjoyed doing. It’s just that simple. Every man needs himself a hobby. Even Faye here had one with her little clinic. It may be the only source of fulfillment we’ll ever find in this wretched world.”

“Oh, I see,” Levi angled his head back, swallowing. “Is that why you blew off my people’s heads, then?” He would never outwardly show just how furious he was with Kenny, but the quiet anger was coming to a boil within him, and Faye steeled herself for the eruption that was sure to ensue. “‘Cause it’s fulfilling?”

It was an action so minuscule anyone else would have missed it, but Faye’s eyes caught on Levi’s fingers, turning the wine bottle around, leaving the polished green glass to reflect Kenny’s image.

“Yup,” He didn’t even sound concerned with lying, choosing to bask in the truth like the fiend he was. “To achieve my grand goal, I’ll kill as many as get in my way.”

“Yeah,” Faye snorted, “So is everything you told me last night bullsh*t? I thought I was on your list of the top three people you didn’t want to kill.”

“You are, but that doesn’t mean I won’t kill you if I have to.” She could see him raise the gun while he held a chair in the other. “And you and Levi are the same way. You’ll kill, too, when it benefits you.”

Levi nodded, gaze honed in on Kenny swinging the chair back to give himself more momentum.

“Yeah,” The two captains agreed.

That was all it took for Faye to fling the shotgun over her head and pull back on the trigger. She didn’t need to look back to check on Levi, even as she dropped the gun into the barkeeper’s hands while he thanked her.

Kenny would only be down for a minute at most, and if they didn’t make use of their time, he would hunt them down brutally.

And so, Levi grabbed a chair and flung it out the window before he let his gear whir to life, and Faye followed suit. The second she flew out the window, she diverted from behind Levi, choosing to drop another life as her hand ripped into her pocket and pulled the safety from her revolver. That was one shot she had already taken earlier, which left her with five until she could reload.

Her finger squeezed the trigger at the same time as her other hand nudged one of the mechanisms on her gear, twisting her hip to aim her wires at one of the poor MPs stationed outside. The f*cker hadn’t even seen it coming before a bullet forced its way into his brain, and her lines simultaneously lifted her up and hooked into his skin, grappling the dead weight straight into her hands as a makeshift shield.

Guns are efficient, much less personal than blades, Faye kept reminding herself as she pulled the trigger again and again and again. That was five bullets gone from the chamber since sunrise, leaving five warm corpses in its wake.

“Are you following me?” Faye shouted over the wind, rounding the corner where the wagon should have been while on route.

“Like hell I am,” Levi snapped. “You and I are going to have a nice, long talk about all this sh*t when we settle down for the night.”

Faye’s arm moved instinctually, pulling the revolver out and aiming before she fired, but even as the body began to fall, Levi thumbed the mechanisms on his own gear, grunting as he sped up, blade in hand.

Faye didn’t have the heart to watch as his blade sliced through the corpse unnecessarily.

“Follow the wagon,” Levi barked at the rest of his squad, coming to a stop on the side of a building before setting off again with his team following closely. “Listen up. These soldiers were trained to fight other people. They’ve already taken out three of ours.” His voice lowered in warning. “If you hesitate for so much as a second, you’ll be dead.”

The teenagers all grunted as they propelled forward, leaving Levi, Faye, and Alexander behind them.

“Al’,” Faye called, frowning at how sallow the boy looked. His face had lost its colour, and his lips seemed to be gasping in greedy gulps of air. “Don’t overthink this. You’ll get lost in your thoughts and get killed. Let your instincts guide you.”

“Get going, Ral. Cover Springer and Braus if you can.”

For once, Alexander listened to Levi without kicking up a fuss, and he let his lines pull him down towards the teenagers, blades gripped tightly in his hands as he braced himself. Levi was right behind him, swinging into action like it was a normal Tuesday night, and though Alexander would never have noticed it, Levi kept close to him.

Then Faye went, and victim after victim fell in the wake of her blades. Whatever emotions Faye should have felt in the moment were drowned by her survival instincts. The movements might have been different from those when she had been a kid and in the warrior program, but the action was the same.

Kill, or be killed.

That was, until it wasn’t.

One second, Faye’s blade was coming down on one of the MPs, slick with blood, and the next, there was a long-barrelled gun blocking her blade while the son of a bitch grinned from under his wide-brimmed hat.

“Careful, kid,” Kenny shoved her blade to the side, capturing her full attention with ease. “You could really hurt someone.”

Then came the jerk on one of her lines, then another, and another, and another. By the time Faye realized all of her lines had been cut, it was too late. She was hurtling toward the ground, one hand shoving the blade back into its holder while the other jutted out in an attempt to grab onto the side of the building she was next to.

Her nails caught on the brick siding, and she could feel them splitting while the skin on the pads of her fingers was essentially sanded off. Time slowed to keep pace with her heart, which had caught in her throat.

For once, Faye Jaeger was at a loss of what to do.

Not that she had much time to dwell on the dismal familiarity she felt at being helpless. For Faye, it was out of the frying pan and into the arms of a notorious serial killer.

“Kenny?” Faye breathed, fingers twitching— begging —to slip into her pocket and take hold of the revolver. Her head tilted up quizzically, lips turning down to frown at the older man, whose canines peeked out from the unhinged grin under the wide-brimmed hat. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“You know, Faye,” He grunted, shifting the girl in his arms to a more comfortable grip. Her knees rested on one arm, while the other held her shoulders, keeping her close to his chest. “I told ya’ back at that sh*tty courthouse not to get into any trouble.”

“Kenny, are you—” She hated herself for feeling like she even needed to ask. “Are you going to kill me?”

Her voice came out smaller than expected, and her eyes went round as she held her breath. She counted her heartbeats, swallowing down the fear.

Kenny couldn’t stop the sigh that blew past his lips. “Kid, if I wanted you dead, you’d have a bullet between your eyes by now.” His eyes seemed to cloud over, getting lost in his thoughts as he let his gear pull them around a corner, away from prying eyes.

“Is my brother safe?” In hindsight, the question may have sounded unimportant, especially considering the gravity of Faye’s situation being carried to what she could only assume was her death by a former serial killer. Still, to Faye, it meant the difference between a death she could die peacefully with, or a life in purgatory long after her body would have gone cold.

“He’s fine,” Kenny’s feet hit the ground, and slowly, reluctantly, he let Faye stand, though he kept close to her side. “Taking a little nap with the girl.” He didn’t make any sudden movements—he didn’t need to. Not with Faye. Slowly, his hand delved into his pocket, fishing out a syringe. “You gonna take it like a sh*t-stained little brat, or save your dignity?”

“Hey, Kenny,” Faye whispered, pressing herself against the wall and squeezing her eyes shut. Titans emerging from people flashed in her head, bringing with it the flares of lightning and a grinning titan. “On three?”

She felt his hand clamp over her shoulder, giving it what she interpreted to be a comforting squeeze. She heard him start to count, and she tensed, clenching her teeth together and locking her joints to keep from running.

Kenny injected on “two.”

*

“Our situation just got worse!” Hange flung the door open with Moblit hot on their trail. “I have two things to report, Commander. First, the enemy abducted Eren, Faye, and Historia. Three from my squad were killed in the fighting. I’m about to meet with Captain Levi and follow up on a lead he might have as to their current whereabouts.”

“Understood.” Erwin turned to face the mad scientist and finished buttoning his shirt up. The lines beneath his eyes seemed more pronounced, and the colour had long since faded from Erwin’s face. “What else?”

“Eren recorded a conversation he overheard between Ymir and Bertholdt,” they cradled their head, muttering out, “But if this is actually true then— sh*t, I feel like my head is about to explode.”

The commander’s patience wore thin as he narrowed his eyes at Hange. He thought about just letting them be, but time wasn’t a luxury he could afford, so, instead, he poured them a cup of water and stiffly handed it over.

“Hange, don’t waste my time.” Irritation dripped from his tone as he watched his section commander gulp the water down, and he straightened his shoulders, waiting for them to continue.

“Unless we recover him quickly, Eren will be devoured.”

A thoughtful hum vibrated in Erwin’s chest, “And you think this causes a transfer of his abilities to transform into a titan and remain cognizant?” Of course, he already knew the answer, but he wanted to hear Hange say it—if only to confirm his theory.

“Yes. We’re still not sure who the next inheritor will be, though.”

“I see.” Slowly, Erwin moved to peer out his window, an action he found himself often doing since being placed under house arrest. “You’re dismissed. Report back to me with any further updates, and ensure no other members of the Scouting Regiment fall into enemy hands.”

“Yes, sir.”

Within an instant, Erwin was left alone again. He watched the lamp post flicker a few times, illuminating the heads of a few citizens who deigned to walk the streets so late at night. His eyes caught on the corner of his window, and his lips turned down. It was beginning to freeze over in a thick sheen of frost, no doubt a testament to the chilling winds plaguing the outside world.

He felt the growl vibrate in his throat as his hand raked through his hair, tousling it as his mind ran wild with the possibilities.

Had Faye known Eren needed to be eaten to pass on his titan abilities? And if so, had she known who Eren had eaten in the first place to gain his?

Faye seemed to be a living, breathing conundrum, and the longer he spent in her wake, the more questions bubbled to the surface, leaving Erwin to sit and ponder over her very existence. This was the longest he had ever gone in drawing a blank when it came to reading someone. While it was exhilarating in the beginning, the commander was quickly coming to realize that the fun lay in peeling back the layers of Faye’s personality and secrets; an action he couldn’t do while on house arrest.

A knock on his door jerked Erwin from his thoughts, and he focused on his footsteps as he moved to greet whoever had decided to disturb his evening.

“Nile,” Erwin pulled together a charming smile, trying not to let the exhaustion peek through his exterior. “What can I do for you so late at night?” He could see the anxious teeter in Nile’s steps as he marched forward, shoulders hunched and hands burrowed inside his pockets. “Can I offer you a drink?”

“Where is she?” Nile slammed the door behind him, eyes blown wide as he hissed through his teeth. “Where are you hiding that criminal?” His fingers slid into his hair, tugging at it wildly.

Erwin blinked, brows furrowing as he regarded Nile with a shift in seriousness. “She escaped?” He said it slowly, mind whirring to life.

“How could she escape if she never went into custody?!” Nile snapped, gnashing his teeth together in frustration. “You’re hiding a criminal, Erwin, and if you don’t—”

“Nile,” Erwin clamped his hand down on his friend’s shoulder, guiding him to the small table by his window to take a seat. “I think it’s time you and I had a conversation about the Good Doctor.”

*

“You keep shaking like that, and we’ll mistake you for a f*cking leaf and leave you here.”

Alexander glanced back at Captain Levi with an unimpressed tilt to his lips, fighting the urge to scowl despite the thick veil of darkness that blanketed the pair. To say the boy was bitter would be an understatement. Resentful, spiteful, even acrimonious (A word he had only recently learned while speaking to Armin, mind you.) but bitter? Bitter just couldn’t cut it.

“All due respect, Captain,” He spat out the word like it burned his tongue. “I’m not in the mood to deal with your sh*t right now.” The boy’s hand gripped tightly to the tree trunk in front of him to stabilize his shaking. His knuckles were going white, and he struggled to keep his thoughts from wandering. “Faye is out there, and the longer I sit here, the more of a chance we have of finding her corpse in an alley somewhere.”

“They wouldn’t kill her.”

For a long, patronizing heartbeat, Alexander froze, lips smoothing out into a grim line while his eyes faded, getting lost in a thought. The horses’ footfalls were getting closer, and the team would need to intercept the carriage in a few seconds.

“Captain Levi,” He hesitated, swallowing the lump in his throat. “What do you think they want with her?” Alexander wiped the sweat from his palm on his knee as he shifted to look his superior in the eyes.

“The same thing Erwin wants,” Levi pulled his blade out, furrowing his brows as he readied his lines. “Knowledge.”

And before Alexander could even think to respond, the captain stepped forward along the road, moving out from the shadows and nodding for his squad to follow suit. He didn’t spare Alexander any other glances, leaving the boy to sputter for a moment before scrambling to get in line with the rest.

The carriage rolled to a stop, and Jean stepped forward, readying the rifle against his shoulder, and pointing it just like how Faye had shown him earlier. It was a point-blank shot, so he shouldn’t have had too much trouble in shooting their target down.

Sannes peeked his head out, and Jean shoved the barrel of the gun into his temple, sending him down with a grunt while Mikasa took care of Ralph. Alexander said nothing, though his eyes caught Armin’s, and his heart sunk.

The blond’s eyes were filled with unshed tears, and his chin quivered.

All of them were becoming criminals whether they liked it or not.

“Captain,” Alexander tugged on Levi’s sleeve, begging for his undivided attention as the rest of the squad worked to tie the men up. “You knew they were after Faye, too. Why didn’t you keep a closer eye on her?” He wasn’t being accusatory in his tone, it was a genuine question, and Alexander’s wide eyes only added to his vulnerability in bluntly asking the question swimming in his mind.

Levi flitted his gaze up, lips turning down. “She would have been distracted, and that would have been more dangerous of a situation for her to navigate.” He could see the disbelief drowning the lieutenant, and he sighed, clicking his tongue. “You didn’t see yourself. You looked like you were ready to sh*t yourself, and your use of the ODM gear was worse than usual. She—” He scowled, forcing himself to say her name for the first time since her kidnapping. “Faye would have followed you if I hadn’t.”

“I—I would have been fine,” Alexander tried to reason, ears reddening as his eyes blinked the hotness away. “I figured out how to land properly, I can take care of myself.”

“Ral, you couldn’t even look at the enemy earlier,” Levi turned away, fixating his attention on the rest of his squadmates. “Be grateful someone took your ass into consideration instead of condemning your teammates.”

Truth be told, Alexander barely remembered the walk back to their makeshift base. He had kept his head down most of the way, and before he knew it, he had been seated with the rest of his squad, staring down at the sh*ttiest tea in existence and listening to the screams of pure, unadulterated agony.

“Hey,” Connie nudged Al’, “You okay? You haven’t said a word this whole time.”

“Sannes is sure yelling a lot,” he sighed, staring up at the ceiling. “You think Captain Levi is really pulling fingernails out?” It wasn’t what Alexander wanted to talk about, per se, but anything was better than talking about his feelings, especially not to a bunch of teenagers he barely knew. “You’d think he would remember his own words about people talking after one nail.” He tilted his head to the side, peeking at the kids who wore glum frowns.

“You think you could make him talk?” Mikasa spoke up, narrowing her eyes. “Because if not, you shouldn’t be insulting our captain.”

“I thought you didn’t like him, Mikasa.” Al’ snapped, back stiffening as he sat straight. “So why are you defending him all of a sudden? One second you’re sh*t-talking him because, ohmygod, this is the third time Captain Levi almost killed Eren, and now you’re sitting here, praising his name for everyone inside the walls to hear? Get over yourself, Mikasa.”

“Hey,” Jean’s chair clattered to the floor from how quick he stood up. “That’s going too far, Lieutenant Ral. Apologize.”

“Jean, you’ve been the most useless person on this squad,” Alexander followed Jean’s lead, standing to his full height to glare over the table as everyone watched in silence. “Armin had to kill someone because you hesitated. Didn’t you want to be part of the Military Police? Who do you think was pointing their guns at us earlier? Huh? Did you think of that? You made Arlert cry.”

“You think I don’t know that?!” Jean’s fist slammed down on the table as he shouted. “I’m the reason Armin has blood on his hands. I know I failed him, you piece of sh*t. You don’t have to rub it in my—”

“What the hell are you idiots arguing about this time?”

Alexander let out a dry laugh as he turned to Levi in the doorway. He wore an old apron that was covered in blood. It was still warm, by the looks of how bright it was, and a small spatter had landed on Levi’s cheek.

“Great. Just f*cking great. Captain Levi to the rescue again.”

“Ral,” Levi growled. “Sit down before you sh*t in someone’s tea.”

“No,” Inwardly, he knew he was just being difficult. He was just picking a fight, so he didn’t have to sit with his thoughts for much longer, but Alexander was like a madman on a rampage, and he couldn’t stop himself from spewing out the words burning in his esophagus. “You told me Faye wouldn’t be killed, but you know what? I think you were just projecting, Captain. I think—”

Alexander’s knees buckled under his weight as Levi’s foot slammed into his chest. The wind left his lungs, and for a patronizing heartbeat, he forgot oxygen even existed.

“Don’t forget your place as a soldier, Lieutenant,” The captain glared down at the boy rigidly. He might have been short, but his sheer strength in his kicks made up for what he lacked in height. “Faye might put up with your bullsh*t, but—”

“Oh f*ck off,” Alexander sourly spat, wincing as he stood up. “You think you can just beat your subordinates up for speaking their minds? That’s abuse, you—”

No one had even noticed Hange and Moblit come in, and the teenagers all startled at the uncharacteristically serious tone the squad leader spoke with, commanding the room’s undivided attention.

“Lieutenant Ral, that’s enough.” Hange stood unmoving, eyes narrowed and shoulders stiff. “Take a walk and be back in an hour. You can come with Moblit and me to give Commander Smith a status report.”

“Whatever.” Al’ shrugged away from Armin, who had reached out to try and brush against his arm. “You’re all a bunch of sheep being herded right into a titans mouth.”

Hange watched Alexander's back as he stormed away, eyes narrowed and alert.

Alexander could feel the stares of his squadmates as he shuffled out the door and into the forest. Puffs of air escaped his lips as he breathed in and out, boots crunching over the frosted grass. As soon as he ventured far enough into the woods where he couldn’t be seen, his chin quivered, and his eyes screwed shut.

The forest had long since shrouded over with darkness, and for a patronizing heartbeat, the world around him had silenced, leaving only the sound of his strangled cries. His knees dropped, and he held his stomach, keeling over to lean his forehead into the cool grass.

The air got lodged in his throat, and he struggled to inflate his lungs with oxygen, muttering “Dammit” out as if that would somehow help.

For a time, the forest listened to the boy weep, stomach flat against the grass as his chest heaved up and down and his nose dug into the dirt. He was swallowed by the night, veiled by the darkness consuming him.

He didn’t know how long he stayed there. It felt like an eternity. He would have laid and wallowed for longer if the back of his head hadn’t felt suddenly warm, and when he blinked, forehead still against the grass, he had to hold his breath and bite his tongue to make sure he wasn’t dreaming.

There, against what should have been pitch black forested floor, was his shadow against a halo of warm orange light that flickered every so often. Like the grass beneath him, Alexander froze.

“You’re twenty, and you still act like a child.”

Al’ sniffled, squeezing his eyes shut. He let his ears ring with the whisper of a sigh before he straightened out and rubbed the dirt from his nose, squinting against the bright lantern at the familiar face against a sea of black.

“Hey, dad.”

Both men stared at each other, silently sizing the other up with sharp eyes. Mr. Ral, while previously had looked well-fed and healthy, now looked a great deal thinner and gaunt. His face was pale, maybe even sallow—not that Alexander could even tell, especially not in the warm glow the lantern provided—and the lines around his mouth and beneath his eyes looked more pronounced, deepened with every waking hour spent traveling within the walls.

“I could hear you sobbing from half a mile away, boy.” Mr. Ral annunciated, seemingly towering over Alexander, who leaned away. “I thought the military would have taught you better. Petra would never have—”

“Are you ever going to be satisfied with me as your son?” He breathed out a heavy sigh, hanging his head. He thought of Faye, of how quick-tongued she was in the face of adversity, and he only hoped he could impersonate her blunt intelligence. “She’s dead, and I’m all you have left. Maybe you should treat your son a little better unless you want to really end up alone.”

“You’re no son of mine,” Mr. Ral lifted his chin, stepping back from his flesh and blood. “You’re a spoiled, selfish little brat who turned on his own mother and sister for a whor* you barely know.”

“Selfish?” Al’ sputtered, jolted out of his rigid stance as he stared up, lips parted in questioning. “I worked my ass off for our family. I was the reason you could keep selling merchandise. I put bread on the table for mom when you—”

“You’re blind, Alexander.” Mr. Ral’s tone was stern, like a parent reprimanding their child. “Have you ever considered how your mother or I felt when you started working at that silly little tea shop? We had plans for you and Petra, aspirations and hopes to see the two of you marry into wealthy families and live long prosperous lives.” His voice shook in turn with his fist as he gripped tightly to the lantern, making it swing back and forth with his boundless fury. “But you ruined it all when you went to work for that degenerate prostitute. She was a bad influence, and now you’re paying the price. You f*cked it all up.”

“I f*cked it all up?” Alexander couldn’t help but repeat, eyes widening as his lip curled back in disgust. “You f*cked it all up. Where were you when Trost fell, and mom died? Or when Petra had a mental breakdown? Or when Uncle Orwell did us a favour and kept Faye from getting executed? Huh?” He hadn’t even realized his legs moving to stand head to head with his father, face awash with the violent undulations of the lantern.

“What right do you have to speak of John, Alexander?” The lantern slowed, and Mr. Ral’s shoulder’s slumped. “You didn’t even know the man. Neither of us did.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Al’s brows pinched together, lips thin as he wiped the sweat from his palms on his pants. “He was married to your sister. You were the best man at their wedding, and you want to stand here and tell me you don’t know Crazy Uncle John?!”

“He’s dead, Alexander.” Mr. Ral’s tone had gone absolute and cold, dropping an octave in warning. “He committed suicide. Do any of us really know why he shot himself in the head? Petra mentioned he wanted to talk to Faye and that she was the last person to speak to him alive, but what did those two really discuss? What did she say to edge him over the cliff?”

The spiteful retort dissolved in Alexander’s throat, leaving his mouth with a bitter taste. He counted his heartbeats as his mind raced. One, two, three, four long, slow beats before Mr. Ral continued.

“She was the last person to see your mother alive, Alexander. Your mother. You can’t just stand back and tell me you have that much faith in the criminal doctor.” Then, he let out a heavy sigh, glancing up at the sky. His voice went soft, “Who knows, she was probably the last person to see Petra, too.”

Alexander’s mouth opened and closed, trying to wrap his mind around the idea his father was insinuating. It was ludicrous, he felt insane for even entertaining the thought, but the more he tried to deny it, the more of an itch wiggled at the back of his mind.

“Do you—” Al’ bit his lip, squeezing his eyes shut while he steadied his breath. “Do you really think Faye was capable of something like that? Of killing people she knew in cold blood?”

“She’s killed more people than you or I could estimate,” Mr. Ral shrugged, taking a tentative step back. “A murderer is a murderer no matter which way you spin it. Is it so far-fetched to assume she had something to do with their deaths?”

Alexander’s mouth went dry, mind running wild with the possibilities.

*

A low groan sounded out from Faye’s throat. Her whole body had gone heavy like her veins were full of lead, and when she shifted her head, she found herself going dizzy.

“Oi,” Kenny shrugged his shoulder, nudging Faye’s cheek. “Rise and shine, kid. Blondie has been waiting for you.”

“Blondie? You mean Erwin?” She slurred, blinking a few times. Faye winced, squeezing her eyes tightly at the bright crystals surrounding the pair. “Where is he? Where are we, Kenny?” She didn’t move her cheek from his shoulder, body too sore and weighted for her to care. “What’d you inject me with?”

“Does it matter?” He held down a chuckle, steps echoing off the crystals. “We just got the news that Commander Smith escaped the gallows by a hair. Doesn’t mean Levi won’t.”

Faye hummed, “Levi, huh?” She could feel his back tense, dreading the question he knew she would inevitably ask. “Why did you do it? Why’d you leave him?”

Kenny stopped walking, spine going stiff while his hands tightened around Faye’s legs. For a time, he said nothing, quietly wondering the same thing, himself. Then, his feet resumed their slow pace, marching forward to the beat of his heart.

“Why do I ever do anything?” He grunted, hoisting Faye to sit on his back a little better. “For my own gain. Levi is just another adversary in the grand scheme of things, and I won’t feel a lick of grief when I kill the little squirt.”

“Are you gonna feel sad when you kill me?”

“You?” Kenny could feel the corners of his mouth twitching up somberly, and he dipped his head down, hiding under the wide-brimmed hat he wore. “Never.”

Faye hummed, “I heard your heart stutter, you liar.” Despite being carried by a serial killer and having her wrists tied, Faye felt an odd sense of peace. “I’m glad that you’re my executioner. There’s a lot of people who want my head on a silver platter, but you? You don’t care. I could tell you I have royal blood flowing through my veins, and you wouldn’t even bat an eye before shooting me.”

“Royal blood, eh?” Kenny scratched his chin, mind wandering back to what felt like a lifetime ago. “Uri would have liked you. Might have even raised you as his own if you told him that bullsh*t.”

“I don’t know. I wasn’t exactly a well-adjusted kid.” Half a snort rushed through Faye’s nose. “You would have thrown me out after I sassed you one too many times.” She waited for Kenny to quip back and agree, but he let silence permeate their conversation, and her heart sank. “You know,” Faye continued. “You could have made a family out of Uri and Levi. He doesn’t even know what his own last name is.”

“A serial killer ain’t exactly parent-material.”

“Levi turned out pretty good,” Faye mumbled, vision going bleary. “His sense of humour could use some work, but he has a good head on his shoulders, and he has you to thank.”

“Oi, pipsqueak,” He tilted his head to lean on Faye’s. She was cold in comparison to him, and his lips tugged down. “What happened to you when Wall Rose was breached?” He had heard rumours about her disappearance, and it was maddening not knowing how she had escaped, especially in such bad condition. “I saw you in the hospital. You should have been dead.”

“You visited me?”

He hummed and nodded, and just as Faye opened her lips to casually mention her kidnapping, another voice interrupted their conversation.

“Kenny Ackerman,” Rod Reiss acknowledged, dipping his chin. “I see you brought the Jaeger girl. Hold her down while I grab the serum. You can exterminate her after I’ve interrogated her.”

If Rod Reiss had bothered to watch the pair for just a second longer, he would have caught the slight growl that rippled in Kenny’s throat as he gently set Faye on the ground, muttering a few choice words under his breath.

“Kenny,” Faye spoke quietly, settling on her knees as she reverently looked up at him. “If someone has to kill me, I’m glad it’s going to be you.”

“You little piss-sucker,” The serial-killer scowled, lips pursing while he averted his gaze. “Did they teach you to suck up to the enemy in the Scouts? Or did you learn that when you were in Shiganshina?”

She blinked, lips curling up into a small smile. “I know you don’t mean that.”

“I think Blondie over there was hoping to get a word in with you,” Kenny’s chin jutted out behind her, and Faye craned her neck to follow his line of sight. “Mentioned wanting to interrogate you herself, but Fatty didn’t like the idea of it very much.”

Historia stood at the entrance to a small tunnel, eyes unblinking as she watched Faye and Kenny. For the first time in a long time, Faye felt a sense of dread. Like she didn’t even need to hear the words for her to know the truth. The white robes Historia wore only accentuated her fair skin and blonde hair, making the dark circles beneath her eyes all the more noticeable in contrast.

“Surprised me, too.” Kenny scratched the underside of his chin in thought. “Took me back to the first time I met you at that sh*tty little tea shop. If that girl lost the baby fat and changed her hair and eye colour, you two could have passed as twins.”

“Twins.” Faye numbly echoed, noting the irony Kenny had failed to realize. For a heartbeat, the information settled in her brain, and slowly, she started to piece it all together. “Historia and Rod, they’re….” She trailed off, furrowing her brows as she peeked at Historia once more. “They’re the royal descendants.”

It was starting to make sense. The uncanny resemblance Historia shared with Dina, the bizarre familiarity that tugged at the back of Faye’s mind every time she looked at the young royal, the reason she kept her identity as a “noble” a secret. All of it. The only missing piece to the puzzle that Faye had yet to figure out was—